Family Doesn't End With Blood
by ColossusProblematic
Summary: After he awakens to find his life upended and his friends scattered, Shepard continues the struggle against the hidden enemies that threaten the galaxy while he tries to reclaim the family he lost. M for language, violence, adult content. Being progressively rewritten as new chapters are added.
1. Time off

**Author's note:**

_This is undergoing a rewrite, so there may be the occasional minor continuity error and you'll likely see a shift in writing quality or style at some point when you hit the originally posted chapters._

* * *

"Keelah, this is insane!"

Those four simple words had led to a rather lively exchange while the Mako had bounced, hopped, swerved, and performed every stomach-lurching move Shepard could muster, all while under fire from four geth colossi as they sped toward a miniature mass relay. The words were no stranger to Tali'Zorah's mind, but she usually kept them from escaping her lips. She had always been proud of her ability to keep her composure, doing her best to emulate her commander and the centuries-old krogan battlemaster in their team, but the situation had progressively been escalating from bad to worse. Much worse.

Leaping thousands of light-years in a split second in a starship designed for such travel had always been a nearly unbelievable act, even to a brilliant young quarian engineer who understood the theory. Doing it in a light tank designed for planetary surfaces – and poorly designed at that, in her opinion – was nothing short of insane. She'd held her tongue as long as she was able, even when her asari companion had been repeatedly asking the commander if they were really about to take a ground vehicle through a relay, but when Shepard hopped the Mako over a siege pulse that would have obliterated their shields, her mouth had moved independent of her brain.

_"We'll be fine!"_ had been Shepard's terse reply. When they found themselves in an overturned tank on the darkened, burning Citadel, she had become a believer. Even when they advanced along the outside of the tower leading to the Council chambers while a two-kilometer dreadnought clung to its apex, she still believed. But when an immense piece of smoldering wreckage from that dreadnought crashed through the window of the chambers, she knew his quickly uttered promise hadn't been kept in its entirety. 'We' had become 'you'.

Tali stared into the darkness of their prison beside Liara in silence. The asari had roused her from unconsciousness half an hour before, terribly relieved, but it had only taken a moment for them to remember the events that had left them trapped in a cage of Sovereign's wreckage. They had watched while turian and human ships fired dozens of merciless volleys into the sapient dreadnought, finally bursting it open in a storm of fire and angry red energy discharges that left them cheering. Beside them, Shepard had been quiet, but the small, tight smile on his lips was the first one in days that she had seen free of the tension that had weighed him down since the loss of one of their own. It had been over; their mission was accomplished, the galaxy was saved from the Reaper invasion, and they could all go on the shore leave their commander had promised.

But that happy moment had lasted only seconds. The tension had suddenly returned to Shepard's face, azure eyes opening wide while he yelled at them to move. His strong hands on been on their backs, propelling them from the window with every ounce of strength and biotic energy he could muster, and the last Tali had seen of him was a dim shadow of charcoal grey diving in a futile attempt to escape ten metric tons of metal.

She couldn't even muster the energy to protest the injustice of it all. Tali was vaguely aware of Liara's hesitant, quivering voice but didn't hear the words. Even the flickering of the light on the asari's omni-tool didn't stir her. A half hour passed in agonizing slowness, but she was lost in memories of three months spent on a human ship. Three months of combat, pain, stress, and fear. But there had also been camaraderie, pride, excitement, and friendship.

Tali finally moved, her head shaking slowly while she recalled their human commander and felt the weight of his gift to her in an arm pocket of her suit. The key to her return to the Migrant Fleet, it was a pilgrimage gift greater than almost any that had been given before. But it felt like little more than a ruined memory. She, a quarian, branded as a thief or vagrant by the galaxy, had been given a priceless gift by the first alien to have ever trusted her completely.

But she would have traded it in a heartbeat to bring him back from the dead.

* * *

"Wait, you thought he was dead?"

The mischievous, incredulous voice broke Tali from the events she'd been recounting and she looked up to see Jeff Moreau grinning at her, a bit of white foam clinging to his mustache and beard. "You did, didn't you?"

"Oh, shut up," Tali muttered, quickly busying herself with reinserting the straw attached to her drink through her mask while the others at the table had a laugh at her expense. Shepard's respected reputation as a soldier had only grown since he was inducted into the ranks of the Spectres and the crew had begun to joke that their commander could only be killed by a silver bullet fired from a consecrated gun forged during a solar eclipse. The pulsing music of Flux was subtly muted in deference to the assembly of heroes that had the club all to themselves, but Tali found herself wishing it was louder.

"Prothean beacons, buried nukes, a Reaper-possessed Spectre... he survived all that, and you thought a chunk of _debris_ got him?" Garrus' flanging voice was dry and amused, and he took another sip of his drink while he leaned back in his chair.

"You're forgetting the hundred krogan," Ashley added, slapping Wrex's armored shoulder. The immense krogan opened his toothy maw in a wide grin.

"Bah. Nothing but cannon fodder. Me, on the other hand? I-"

"Have looks and breath that would make a geth colossus flee in terror, Wrex."

The occupants of the table looked up with smiles and laughs when their commander walked up, one arm in a sling and the other clutching a large mug of dark beer. "What's the topic? Aside from Wrex's generally hideous appearance, that is."

While Shepard dropped into his chair, Karin Chakwas eyed Tali and Liara with a sly grin. "Oh, they were poking fun at Tali for believing you had met your end beneath a few metric tons of scrap metal."

Over the course of three months he had become quite adept at reading the quarian's body language, by necessity given that her mouth was hidden by a vocal modulator and only a hint of her features were revealed through the tinted glass of her visor. The tension in her shoulders and the lowering of her eyes made him grin. Embarrassment, was it? Well, he wouldn't let her suffer alone.

"She wasn't the only one. You should have seen Anderson and Liara's faces."

While the blue-skinned asari tried to hide her faint blush with a roll of her eyes, the others laughed and Joker grinned wide. "I knew it. See, when I saw that huge chunk hit the Presidium Spire I knew Shepard would dodge it or punch it back into space or something, but Liara and Tali? Yeah, heart attacks." The teased quarian and asari exchanged smirks.

"Hardly," Liara replied smoothly. "We were too busy nimbly and heroically dodging debris to be worried about some human."

"Uh huh," Joker replied doubtfully before turning his gaze to Shepard with mischief in his eyes. "So which of them got all teary-eyed and hugged you first? And was there dramatic music playing?"

Shepard leaned back in his chair with a calm smile, drumming the fingertips of his right hand on his mug while the squad waited. After a long moment he simply shrugged and nodded his head toward Tali and Liara. "Ask them."

The two harassed females glared at their commander for a few seconds but Tali finally sighed and answered first, folding her arms while she looked back at Joker. "Anderson."

"But there were no tears," Shepard added between sips, putting an appropriately gruff tone in his voice. "And it was a manly hug, of course."

"You're joking," Garrus remarked dryly, accompanying his disbelief with a swallow of turian ale while Ash smirked and Joker shook his head.

Tali stood fast, laughing. "I'm serious. No, forget all about his friends, the ones he dragged across the galaxy, the ones he almost got crushed by an ancient sapient dreadnought with a _creepy_ voice-"

"It reminded me of Wrex's voice, actually," Shepard interjected, flashing a crooked smile over the rim of his mug while the krogan downed another half liter of beer. Joker gave him a knowing grin, though, and the girls his input, giving his commander some defense.

"Yeah, well, Anderson and Shepard go back a long ways."

"Riiight," Garrus drawled, "I think it's more likely he just took the safe route and avoided playing favorites."

He resisted the urge to chuckle at Tali and Liara's subtle squirming. The crew seemed to have an inordinate fascination with his relationship with the two women after they'd fallen asleep in his cabin on the way to Ilos. "It wasn't that," Shepard spoke up with another relaxed smile, gazing over at Liara and Tali. "I just knew they'd overlook my broken arm and try to crush me through my armor." He couldn't help it. They were both rather precious when they got embarrassed.

Liara blushed subtly, a deeper shade of blue coloring her cheeks, and Tali's fingers wriggled together atop the table, but the quarian smirked beneath her mask and turned toward the asari. "Liara did that anyway. But you know... I think Shepard might have squeaked out a little yelp." Turning to the commander, she blinked her eyes playfully while he glared at her.

Wrex laughed and slapped his mug back on the table while Joker sighed and slid a credit chit across the table to him. The krogan pocketed it with a toothy grin. That earned a curious arch of a brow from Shepard, who poked Tali's side under the table and elicited a quiet yelp. "Joker, did you really bet against Wrex? I told you he was crafty."

"Yeah, well, Garrus said Tali was a sure thing," Joker grumbled, but he snickered despite his loss when he saw Tali's helmet drooping slightly, a sure sign of her own blush. Liara patted a two-fingered hand atop the table in consolation.

"That'll teach you to trust C-Sec," Ash said, laughing and tossing back the remains of her drink. Shepard smiled at the embarrassed asari and quarian.

"So, Joker... how does it feel to be the pilot who blew apart a two-kilometer dreadnought with dreams of galactic conquest?" Shepard mercifully changed the subject with a grin as he reached across to pat Liara and Tali's hands, earning a warm smile and a gaze from shrouded silver eyes that twinkled a little brighter beneath their mask.

"Oh, man, I'm going to be the poster boy for the Alliance Navy for years!" Joker exclaimed, drawing a round of rolling eyes.

* * *

"What do you mean, you can't dance?" Ashley set her hands on her hips and stared imperiously down at her commander who sat alone at the table. The others had gathered at the bar or on the dance floor, leaving him free to watch them enjoy themselves with a smile on his lips. Contentedly people-watching his crew had become one of his pastimes, something picked up from his mentor.

"Just what it sounds like, Ash. Your commander has a fatal flaw: he can't coordinate himself anywhere but on a battlefield."

"Sounds like an excuse to me, Commander," Ash teased, taking his hand in hers and gently tugging him to his feet while he laughed softly. He should have known she wouldn't take no for an answer. Despite putting a gentle end to the flirtation that had arisen shortly after meeting her, they had a tendency to banter good-naturedly. He had a feeling she sometimes did it in the name of a little wicked humor at Tali and Liara's expense but never voiced that thought. Wisely, to his thinking.

"Officers aren't afforded the luxury of excuses," he chided, accompanying her toward the dance floor where Liara, Tali, and Garrus were laughing and dancing... or at least two of them were. Garrus really did look like he had a stick up his ass, Shepard observed with a sinister chuckle, earning a smirk from Ash when she determined the focus of his amusement.

"At least he's trying, Skipper." She tugged him onto the dance floor by his good arm and poked him on the hip while he rolled his eyes at her. "Move those hips...sir. Remember, no excuses," she teased with a grin, falling smoothly into a rhythm in time to the music while Shepard sighed theatrically and did the same.. in his own way. He tended to avoid dancing whenever possible.

"You'd better remember that when you're attending Officer Candidate School, Williams."

The straightforward way he spoke the words made the swaying of her hips stop. She stared at him for a moment, then curled her lips into a smirk and shook her head. "Very funny, Commander, but you're not getting out of this _that_ easily."

Shepard ceased his poor imitation of dancing and held up his good arm in front of the hand emerging from the sling, tapping on his omni-tool and pulling up a document for Ash to view. She rolled her eyes but leaned in to scan the document anyways while he only watched, smirking mischievously when she leaned back up and turned to stare at him. "Orders.. to report to OCS next month."

"Signed by Admiral Hackett, Commander of the Fifth Fleet, at the recommendation of Commander Shepard, Spectre, Galactic Savior, et cetera," he confirmed, but her stunned expression didn't leave her face. Chuckling, he shut down the omni-tool and set a hand on her waist, nudging her back into motion. "Ash, I chased a rogue Spectre across the galaxy, defeated an incredibly powerful dreadnought, and got humanity a seat on the Council... according to the media, at least. Family curses are as much of an obstacle to me now as a salarian would be between Wrex and a buffet table."

His sense of humor had made Ash groan before, but this time she only smiled, wrapping her arms around him in a hug. To his surprise, it was rather gentle on his wounded side. And to his utter shock, there was a hint of moisture in the corners of her eyes.

"See? I _am_ getting rid of you that easily," he said, ignoring the breach in protocol and returning her hug while Joker grinned across the room at him from the table, already in the know.

Ash sniffed and leaned away after a long moment, chuckling quietly and shaking her head while trying valiantly to keep the emotion out of her voice. "I'm only going if you've got a second set of orders ready to reassign me to the Normandy when I'm commissioned."

"You don't get to make demands, _Chief._" His emphasis on her rank made her step away, glare, and fold her arms defiantly across his chest. He only laughed. Setting a hand on her shoulder, he guided her her toward their friends who were waiting with smiles on their faces.

"I take it she knows?" Liara asked, beaming. Shepard's own smile wasn't only the result of having made Ashley's night, but from finding the isolated aliens he'd brought aboard enjoying the friendships they'd formed with each other. Some of the tension had taken a while to break, along with one round of bellowing at Ashley and Pressly over indiscreet comments about quarians.

"She knows," Ashley answered with a husky voice before she renewed her glare at the Spectre by her side. "But I told him I'm not going unless I'm returning to the Normandy when I'm done."

Shepard waved a hand dismissively. "I'm sure you can hitch a ride to Ilos from an Alliance research vessel. Anderson might hate me for making him a politician, but I'm sure he'll lean on Hackett again if I ask."

Liara's head and eyes perked up at the very mention of the planet rich in Prothean ruins and she spoke up before anyone else had a chance. "Ilos? We're going back to Ilos?"

"Right, because one visit to a ruined planet with creepy art wasn't enough," Garrus remarked dryly. Liara ignored him, smiling with barely contained anticipation at the commander.

"Hackett wants us to do a sweep for geth leftovers for a couple of weeks, and the Alliance Navy will be busy rebuilding and repairing, but he agreed that a prothean expert and a man who had their cipher burned into his brain would make a good addition to the archaeological team that will be sneaking through the Terminus in a couple of months. Disguised and all that, of course."

"Shepard, I... I don't know what to say," Liara's smile was as soft as her voice, but he waved his hand again and then pointed at Ash.

"Just do me a favor and keep her from trying to make me dance again. She's too damned bossy."

The others laughed at the dangerous smirk on Ashley's lips but Tali quickly stepped over and grabbed his right hand, tugging him off with a grin evident in her voice. "You didn't ask her to keep _me_ from dancing with you."

"Oh, hell," Shepard lamented, but he was laughing while Tali dragged him out to the middle of the floor, silver eyes sparkling up at him behind her visor. That expression, half-hidden as it was, was still enough to coax some movement from his hips while they smiled at each other. There was something about the young quarian engineer that had continued to grow on him, and he rarely found himself more content than when he was sitting with her discussing anything from ships to music.

Back on the sidelines, Garrus draped his arms onto Liara and Ash's shoulders.

"So, ladies..." They turned their gazes away from their commander and the graceful young quarian to glance suspiciously at the turian. "Which one of you wants the consolation prize of a dance with Wrex?"

"I heard that!" a deep voice bellowed from the vicinity of the bar.

* * *

Garrus had accompanied Wrex up into the hills and toward the mountain that loomed over them after the krogan had insisted on killing his own lunch, to the horror of the good doctor and the vegetarian quarian. Shepard, though, was under strict orders to do nothing but relax, walk, or wade, earning a bit of mockery from the hunters and leaving him at the mercies of the Normandy's tyrannical physician. _"__No hiking, no swimming, and absolutely _no _lifting!"_ Chakwas had ordered with the full attention of the crew, much to Joker's amusement.

_ "Welcome to my world, Commander!"_ their pilot had teased, receiving a wry smile and a shooing wave of the hand in return. Joker had obeyed eagerly as he accompanied Liara into the water for one of the few exercises he had at his disposal. Shepard couldn't help but admire the shapely curves of the blue-skinned body beneath the snug one-piece bathing suit the asari had picked up on the Citadel, but he'd torn his eyes away and chuckled at himself after a moment. Having half his ground team made up of curvaceous females had been enough of a distraction even when they were in armor or envirosuits. He should have known better than to pick a beach for their well-deserved shore leave. Though he supposed being a Spectre gave him some freedom from chain of command issues, falling into old bad habits hadn't seemed like a good idea while they were dashing from one part of the galaxy to another in a mission of galactic importance. Still, that seemed less important as time went by. And some of the hand-to-hand instruction had been rather... engaging.

Pushing thoughts of toned females aside, Shepard closed his eyes beneath the warmth of Bekenstein's sun and lay back on the towel draped over the sand. He took a slow, deep breath, feeling only the faintest of twinges from his recovering ribs and nothing at all from his mending arm, though he was careful to obey Chakwas' orders and leave it tucked in against his side when out of the sling. _"Aw, come on, Doc, you can't let him get tan lines!"_ Ash had protested with a grin over at the smirk he'd shot her. But Chakwas had only laughed and given her assent, albeit with conditions. It was good enough, he thought as he laid out in the sun, eyes closed. Idly, he wondered how Anderson was doing in his new position as Councilor. No doubt he was cursing the name of his protege and lamenting the day he'd first met him as a troubled young lieutenant while they'd both been on shore leave on the Citadel. He hadn't realized it at the time, but that would end up being one of the best events in his life.

_ "Why did you join the Alliance, Lieutenant?" Anderson had asked as they stood leaning against the railing, gazing out through the windows of the wards at the glow of the Widow Nebula. The commander was relaxed, his voice calm and level, but Shepard was another story. He was tense, agitated, always taking glimpses of his surroundings. While he'd gazed out into the stellar gasses, he hadn't really cared about the view, a fact that the perceptive commander had picked up easily._

_ "To see space. To fight pirates, protect the Alliance. Family legacy." Shepard shrugged. "The same reasons most join, I suppose." Not that he had done much of that in the previous year, after recovering from the thresher maw disaster on Akuze and attending ICT where he earned his N1 designation. When he'd finished, he had discovered that the Alliance had carried out a retaliatory raid against batarian pirates on Torfan. It was an opportunity missed that had been gnawing at him, one that left him frustrated and reconsidering his future in the Alliance._

_ "Hmm," Anderson had hummed in a tone that revealed his skepticism. "I guess I can understand that. And you've done all of it. But here you are, ready to resign your commission. It doesn't seem to me that you've gotten any satisfaction out of it, despite saving thousands of lives on Elysium and seeing a lot of the galaxy."_

_ Even though there was something about Anderson that had made it alarmingly easy to open up a bit, irritation came quickly to him at being psychoanalyzed. He pushed off the rail with a humorless snort. "Guess not."_

_ "Killing all those batarians didn't give you the satisfaction you wanted, did it?" Anderson spoke as he continued gazing out the window, his voice even. "Your father and sister are still dead, your platoon still died on Akuze, and you're still just going through the motions." Anderson's words made Shepard tense in anger and open his mouth, but the commander kept speaking as he lightly pushed off the railing and turned to gaze at the younger man. "What are you living for, Lieutenant? To kill? To earn another Star of Terra?" He shrugged, ignoring Shepard's clenched fists and turning his head to gaze out the window again. "I'm living for views like this. To hear the laughter of my men on shore leave, to watch mothers point out the stars to their children. To listen to music, taste a new vintage of wine." Anderson shrugged and leaned forward against the rail once more. "It's not much, really, but they're my reasons, and they make me smile. If getting what you claim you wanted through service still doesn't satisfy you, then maybe you _are _in the wrong line of work."_

Shepard's smile returned when the memory came to an end and he became aware of the heat of the sun on his face again, remembering the simple pleasure he used to have on Mindoir feeling the snowflakes falling on his cheeks as he laid back in the snow. He still preferred the cold, much to Wrex and Tali's horror on Noveria, but there was something peaceful about the intensity of the sun's rays and the ferocity of its light. Not to mention the voice that spoke up as something rustled quietly beside him, a soft accented timbre that always made him smile.

"You know, you're stuck up here on the beach but you're smiling," the faintly mechanical voice observed. "I think I have a better chance understanding why Garrus talks to his rifle than why you smile with a half-broken arm. And when you're shooting geth in the face with a shotgun."

Shepard didn't have to open his eyes to know Tali was sitting on the sand beside him with her arms wrapped around her bent knees. Over the span of three months she had become a wonderful friend, happy to stay awake with him deep into the night when his worries stirred him from his bed. Their conversations about anything and everything had distracted him from the stress of learning to be a captain and the leader of a team of aliens while pursuing one of the most dangerous beings in the galaxy. Teasing her when she butchered some of the idioms of his native language and spending hours talking about their lives had been quite enjoyable as well. Shrugging his bare shoulders, he adjusted his good hand where it cushioned the back of his head. "Liara smiles with the sun on her face, and Wrex does the same during a good fight. Maybe I'm part asari and part krogan."

"And part quarian," Tali teased, lying back on the sand beside him while he smirked with closed eyes. "I've never seen anyone blow apart a squad of mercs and scrounge through their weapons and mods like you do."

Shepard grunted and shook his head. "In case you hadn't noticed, I had to buy or scavenge almost all of our weapon and armor upgrades. I don't know if that turian councilor was just being a _bosh'tet_ ," Tali smiled at the word, "or if they enjoy sending their elite agents out undergunned and underarmored."

"Maybe both?" she offered. Shepard laughed again, arching his back and stretching his arms out, jerking at a jolt of pain when his left moved too far from his side.

"Ach... damnit." He pulled his arm back in against his side with a grimace, but felt a tingle on his skin when a three-fingered hand slid gently onto his bicep. He opened his eyes to see Tali's silver orbs gazing through her visor at him with what he was reasonably sure was concern. Sometimes she was hard to read even for him. It was equally curious that his skin was so sensitive to the light touch of a gloved hand, and had been for a long time.

"Are you all right?" she asked softly, her accented voice soothing. Yes, that was definitely concern, gentle enough to warm his heart. He smiled and opened his mouth to reply but another accented female voice answered first.

"Oh, he's fine. He's just playing for sympathy since he can't go swimming," Karin Chakwas teased, folding her bare arms across her chest as Tali and Shepard looked her way, the latter with a grin.

"You know, it's a wonder I managed to get any work done, surrounded by such beautiful women," he stated in a tone that was both gallant and playful, bringing a smirk to the doctor's lips and a laugh from her throat while she shook her head.

"Flattery won't get you anywhere, Commander. At least, not with me. I may be wearing a swimsuit, and putting younger women to shame at that, but I'm still your doctor and mother hen and I say no swimming."

He shrugged his shoulders in resignation and laid his head back down. "Oh well. It was worth a shot."

Chakwas laughed again and walked over to reach down toward his good hand, which he took as she helped him up. "Well, you can at least take Tali wading. She'll make sure a current doesn't finish the job Sovereign started. Come on, now." Tali stood as well but hesitated before Karin grinned at her. "Airtight equals waterproof, Tali. You need to get that sand off you anyway. Besides, you can duck your head underwater and watch the fish."

Tali smiled behind her visor and set a hand gently on Shepard's shoulder, accompanying the commander and doctor to the shore where they waded into the warm water. Ash, Liara, and Joker waved from where they were submerged up to their shoulders. "Damn it, and here I was all by myself with the ladies," Joker protested dramatically. Ashley shoved him playfully, sending him bumping into Liara and promptly triggering a return volley.

"Stop complaining, Joker," Shepard groused halfheartedly. "You can at least swim."

"Hey, you're the one that doesn't get to complain... sir," Joker shot back. "You're only a cripple for a few days, and then you can go back to beating up krogan and walking around the ship without worrying about snapping your tibia." Joker took a deep breath and floated on his back alongside Liara with a contented smile.

"Shepard, please refrain from engaging in fistfights with any krogan while on shore leave," Karin requested dryly. "I rather think I've earned a reprieve from patching you up."

Shepard smirked at her. "I see how it is. My well-being is a priority only because it keeps you from having to do your job."

"And if you did _your_ job properly, you wouldn't spend so much time in my medbay!"

He sighed and shook his head, turning to Tali. "It's nice to feel appreciated."

"Don't feel bad, Shepard," she said brightly. "I appreciate you."

He eyed her with mock suspicion. "You're not just saying that because I'm the reason your Pilgrimage is going to be an epic success, are you?"

Tali shrugged innocently, looking away at an empty expanse of blue water. "Oh, look! Is that a fish?"

Shepard smirked and reached under the water, grabbing her leg behind her knee and upending her with a splash. Tali burst to the surface a moment later with a cry of '_bosh'tet!'_ and promptly began chasing the laughing Spectre, who had wisely already begun retreating in a storm of splashing despite Chakwas' loud objections.

Too absorbed with the spectacle of their injured commander being chased by his soaking wet engineer, no one noticed Wrex's victorious cry of 'Dinner!' from the shore where he had a dead furry quadruped slung over his hump.

* * *

Shepard sighed and tugged the right side of his dress uniform down for the fifth time while he waited with the others for the ceremony to start. If his clothing woes continued he would have to ask Chakwas to whip out old-fashioned sutures and stitch the damned uniform jacket to the waistband of his pants. Anderson had been insistent that he wear full dress, including the dozen medals now pinned to the left side of his chest. Fortunately, his Star of Terra hung around his neck instead of adding to the unbalanced weight. Beside him a muted, accented voice teased him quietly.

"Shepard, you can handle bitchy reporters and hostile admirals, but you can't manage your own clothing?"

He flicked his eyes over to see Tali's silver gaze on him, giving her an almost imperceptible grin with one half of his mouth. "It's not my fault they don't issue these things with counter ballast on the right side. A kilo's worth of metal pinned to one side of your chest makes for balance problems." His mischievous azure eyes lowered to take in the sight of her red and black Kassa Fabrication combination envirosuit and armor, practically gleaming from the polishing Tali had given it. "I'd tell you to try it, but I'm guessing it would take a dreadnought to loosen that suit of yours."

Her head followed her eyes, dropping with embarrassment. She still felt somewhat mortified that he'd spent so much money on her suit, a sum that would have kept the Rayya fueled for months. Shepard had waved off her protests by making the simple point that her home ship would cease to exist alongside the rest of the Migrant Fleet if Saren succeeded in his mission.

Still, practicality aside, she had to admit that she was rather fond of the dangerously elegant look of the black and crimson armor. She was well aware their functional suits were snug and rather flattering to the female quarian figure, but having it mentioned by _him_ left her fingers twitching at her sides and her cheeks burning with warmth. He had a way of making almost any comment about her feel like flirtation, an observation she'd shyly shared with Karin Chakwas at one time when he had left the medbay after checking in on her and making her blush with a warm squeeze of her hand. The doctor had only laughed and suggested she enjoy it... and respond in kind. She'd had no idea how to reply to that, opting to remain silent and blush behind her mask.

Squaring her shoulders, Tali shrugged and glanced sidelong at him, deciding to take the older woman's advice. "Don't feel bad, Shepard; it's okay. I'm sure there are plenty of other things frigates are good at."

She grinned wickedly when she saw his jaw drop for a split second. Recovering quickly, he smirked at her and arched an amused brow. "Oh, I don't know," he murmured, "sometimes subtlety is a lot more effective than a frontal charge. Take the asari, for example. You don't see horny aliens of every species fawning over krogan, do you?"

Tali's own jaw dropped behind her mask at the same time that Joker choked down a snicker and Liara shot Shepard a glare. He simply shrugged innocently and returned to attention when Admiral Hackett stepped up and gave a small hopeless shake of his head. "Commander, it's about to begin. Let's make the Alliance look good, shall we?"

"Yes sir," he replied smoothly. Satisfied, Hackett continued on his way though Tali saw a tiny grin curl the grizzled admiral's scarred lip.

"Commander Shepard, please step forward."

Councilor Tevos' smooth asari voice projected through the open, elegant room of the Council Chambers, bringing the gathering of soldiers and spectators to silence. Shepard's small smile fell away into an impassive mask, his chin lifting in proper military fashion. Protocol, however, didn't stop him from hesitating just long enough to get in the last word.

"Honestly, though, I don't think asari could make those envirosuits look half as good," he murmured, giving her a subtle wink before he stepped out of line and made his way in long, unhurried strides toward the petitioner's stage.

Tali was so flustered that she didn't notice Liara's sidelong stare and she missed half of Tevos' speech. Instead she found herself staring at Shepard's back, nervously wondering how to interpret his comments while Hackett draped a second Star of Terra around his neck and replaced the half-stripe on his shoulders with the third full stripe of a Staff Commander. By the time Sparatus had grudgingly pinned the turian Nova Cluster to Shepard's chest and Valern did the same for the salarian Silver Dagger, she was absently chewing on her lip and smiling widely alongside the others.

Somehow, Joker managed to maintain his Alliance discipline while Shepard made his way down the lineup of his crew, standing proudly at attention when his commander did the honors of pinning on the medals. Tali was envious of the pilot's composure, her toes clenching inside her boots while she struggled to keep her fingers from wriggling.

"Relax," Shepard murmured when he stepped before her. "I promise I won't puncture your suit. ...I think."

She glared at him with all the expression she could muster from behind her tinted visor but he was unfazed, attaching the medals to the top of the black fabric that draped over her right breast. She was once again grateful for the duraglass that concealed her burning cheeks but she smiled when he saluted her before moving on to Liara. Glancing down at the two gleaming awards pinned to her chest, she felt her chest swell with pride and wondered if her father would be as proud as her commander when he watched the recording of the ceremony.

* * *

"Cheater!" Liara accused him, laughing despite herself when Shepard tackled into her from behind after launching off the deck. Wrapping his arms around her waist while she bent over and hugged the ball tighter to her chest, he fought to tear it loose. Both of them floated across the hangar toward the opposite bulkhead in the almost nonexistent gravity that served as part of the evening's entertainment.

Shepard grinned and rolled them to take the soft impact across his back while he popped the ball free. "Don't blame me if you can't understand the rules," he teased, tossing the brown oval toward Wrex while fending the asari off with his free arm. The ball turned in a wobbly spiral as it flew straight to the krogan who waited near the 'end zone' by the hangar belly door. Garrus pushed off the deck to try to intercept it, but Wrex growled menacingly and grabbed the turian's leg to tug him down before he caught the ball cleanly and touched the door.

"Never challenge a krogan, even if the sport is bloodless," Shepard observed. Joker and Tali cheered, to the mild annoyance of Liara, Garrus, Ashley, Pressly, and Adams. Garrus had initially protested the uneven balance of the teams, claiming he needed no charity, but that argument had died quickly when they fell behind. Wrex grinned toothily over at the turian as he tossed the ball his way.

"We're up by two, Garrus. You should learn to listen to Shepard." The battlemaster smirked and pushed off the door, floating back toward the middle of the hangar to line up again. If anyone was shocked to see the ancient, gruff krogan participating in such a lighthearted contest, no one voiced the words.

"I bet Wrex just found a way to use biotics without the glow," Garrus huffed.

"If he did, he didn't tell me," Liara muttered, but she smiled when Shepard's arm slid around her waist. Pushing off the wall, he carried her along with him back to the deck before biotically nudging her toward Ashley with a faint blue glow from his hands. It was all the dark energy he could muster, sadly.

"Or me," he replied with a wink, clasping Tali's wrist while she pulled him down onto his feet on the deck, eyes sparkling behind her visor. Her magnetized boots were technically cheating, but her long-winded and nebulous argument in her own defense had been too clever and endearing to fight.

"No one ever told me low-grav sports could be this fun," Ash said happily as she and Liara slowly tumbled away after colliding. Pressly and Adams were quick to catch them, grinning as wide as the others.

"How do you think I manage to stay in shape without snapping all my bones?" Joker asked wryly as both teams settled back down and lined up. "We don't exactly have a swimming pool on board."

"If you were a biotic, keeping weight off would be easy," Liara said, yelping when Ashley pinched her slender forearm.

"I guess that explains why you're so skinny without ever joining me at the weights," she teased. Liara simply smirked and set her hands on her hips.

Shepard laughed, gesturing at Pressly to center the ball. "Enough yammering. Wrex and I aren't leaving until we're up by ten."

An hour later, with the gravity dialed back up, they were all lounging around the hangar wiping sweat from their foreheads and sipping drinks. Some were grinning, others were scowling, but there was little conviction behind the losers' expressions. Shepard's remark about being up by ten had turned out to be accurate, and he and Wrex leaned against the weapons lockers, arms folded while they looked out at the crew.

"They're a good _krantt_, Shepard. It's been an honor being part of it," Wrex rumbled quietly.

"The honor's been mine, Wrex. But... I'm guessing you've got business to attend to." He turned his head toward the krogan with a faint smile. He'd known it was coming, and they'd already suffered the loss of Kaidan, but the breaking of the team stole some of the happiness of the day. It was a reminder that vacations didn't last forever and there was work to be done. In the case of the Normandy and her crew, it was work with what seemed like an impossible goal: permanently stopping the Reapers. Shepard fought the urge to sigh.

Wrex nodded and glanced over at the crate by his locker which contained his family's armor. "It's time I returned to Tuchanka. I can't just hire myself out for credits while my people feud among themselves and piss their days away. Alenko didn't hesitate when he gave his life to protect the future for the rest of us. Least I can do is honor that kind of bravery by trying to do the same for the krogan."

Shepard nodded silently, remembering Kaidan's words and the kind of man he'd been while he gazed at Ash, who had taken their friend's death as hard as the commander who had known him for years. "I'm sure he'd be honored."

Wrex pulled his shotgun and rifle from his locker and attached them to his armor. Bending, he picked up the crate and held it under one arm while he turned to Shepard and extended his free hand. The commander clasped Wrex's wrist as the krogan did the same, blue eyes meeting red. "Krogan might not welcome outsiders, and you might have to crack a few plates, but if you ever find yourself there, Tuchanka and I would be honored."

Shepard summoned a crooked smile and arched a brow. "Yeah, you definitely need to get back. You're getting soft on this pleasure yacht of ours."

Wrex barked a laugh and released his friend's arm, turning toward the elevator and calling back over his shoulder as he stepped inside. "It's been fun, Shepard." He raised a hand to Garrus and the rest of the crew as well. "Same to the rest of you. Keep piling up the corpses and you'll become legends!"

The squad and crew laughed and most of them waved as Wrex hit the button to ascend. Before the doors closed, though, the battlemaster got in a parting shot. "And Shepard? Make up your mind already!" Shepard smirked but found his cheeks warming when most of the crew turned toward him.

"Make up your mind about what? Commander, are you blushing?" Joker's grin was wide while his CO folded his arms across his chest.

"It's a krogan thing. You wouldn't understand."

* * *

_**Author's note:**_

_A bit of background regarding the way I'm writing Shepard:_

_He's a soldier proficient with just about any weapon. He has minor biotic affinity, mostly using it to nudge off-balance enemies and throw off weapon aim. He's no Kaidan and certainly no Liara. That said, the Lazarus Project gives an interesting opportunity to change things up._

_In trying to choose an origin, I had a tough time choosing and ultimately decided to create a hybrid of colonist and spacer. I thought it would be interesting to make the tragedy on Mindoir an experience shared between mother and son, a relationship I look forward to writing about._

_I faced a similar dilemma with the service history, and decided to blend war hero and sole survivor, who missed out on his chance for revenge on Torfan, to his anger at the time._

_I had concerns about creating a Shepard with such extensive experiences, but ultimately decided that this is my story, and I'd be writing it even without anyone to publish it to. I also felt that such a legendary character could be well served by having a history of severe trials that served to shape him. Besides, I just find it more interesting. There's no rule in fiction that says the squad can only be three strong or that Tali and Liara can't use an assault rifle, after all._

_Looking back at my first few chapters almost a year later, I couldn't help but wince at many parts. A lot of repetition in descriptions and expressions, some parts that feel too melodramatic, etc. This chapter has been rewritten, and I'm planning to update them progressively as new chapters are published._


	2. Love and loss

**Author's note:**

_This chapter has been rewritten._

* * *

The loud sound of the slap brought silence to the garden and drew the gazes of dozens of shocked mourners to where humanity's first Spectre stood in resigned silence, his cheek already turning red. Michelle Alenko was crying again as she stormed away on the arm of her husband, Lee, leaning against him for support. Neither looked back, slipping out of the Presidium garden to the sound of fading sobs.

Shepard stood still and silent for a moment, feeling all eyes on him, no doubt curious what Kaidan's mother had angrily hissed before striking him. Resisting the urge to sigh or glower, he simply turned and began moving quietly toward the other exit to the quiet Presidium garden. He drew up short, however, when a hand slipped into his and gently tugged him to a stop. Turning, he saw Tali gazing up at him, concern evident despite the purple visor that hid her face. Smiling weakly, he shook his head and lightly squeezed her fingers in his. "It's all right. It happens sometimes. Grief manifests itself in different ways." He slipped his hand free and took a seat on a nearby bench, staring down at the grass.

Tali blinked in surprise, moving to sit beside him. "This has happened before?"

He nodded slowly. "Between Elysium, Akuze, and a few others, I've been to a lot of funerals and memorial services. The Blitz happened less than a year after I was commissioned." Turning toward her, he chuckled humorlessly. "I was younger than you are now when that happened. I'd just turned twenty-two." He shook his head. "I was a combat vet but a rookie at leading people. I gathered fifteen off-duty and former soldiers to mount a defense against five hundred batarians and a hundred varren." He rubbed absently at the three scars crossing his lips with his fingertips. "With crap police weapons. Honestly, I'm surprised any of us made it out. And twelve of them didn't. They all put up a hell of a fight, but that's not much comfort to a pregnant widow or father who just lost his little girl."

"Keelah," Tali breathed. "I'm sorry. I guess I never really thought about that part." Stiffening, her eyes opened wider behind her visor. "And Akuze was..."

"A year later, with four times the body count," he confirmed wearily. "And it was completely senseless. That made it harder on the families. No one died saving a life or protecting a colony. They were just... food." He shivered at the thought, shaking his head to clear it and giving Tali a weak smile when she slid her hand onto his forearm. "Anyways. No matter how we pretty it up with ceremony or meaning, people are left behind with a lot of grief to cope with. Sometimes they just need to let it out." Leaning back in the bench, he gazed over at Kaidan's warmly smiling hologram. "I'd rather get slapped and accused of leaving him to die than find out she bottled up her grief to let it eat her up from the inside. I know Kaidan would say the same thing if it was my mother slapping him instead."

They sat in silence for a minute before Tali spoke up hesitantly. "Um... I yelled at the chief engineer of the Rayya after my mother died from that outbreak I told you about. I accused him and his team of being lazy and... well... other things." Turning his head, he saw her shoulders slump as she exhaled a guilty sigh. "My father had them all demoted. It wasn't until I started working in engineering a year later that I realized it wasn't their fault; they just didn't have the equipment to scan for microfractures in the high pressure... well, you know what I mean."

Smiling softly, he laid his hand atop hers. "I know. You don't beat yourself up over that, do you?"

"I... not really. I still feel like an idiot for snapping at them, but when I figured out what really happened I went and apologized to them all." Tali chuckled quietly. "They were so nice to me. None of them were mad. Actually, they told me they'd been worried about me. That made me cry." She sniffled, smiling at the memory. "I convinced Aunt Shala and Admiral Gerrel to promote them all to where they should have been. My father was so angry at me for that, but Han'Gerrel chewed him out." Laughing, she shook her head, silver eyes sparkling up at a grinning Shepard. "Admiral Gerrel would probably be so excited to meet you. Your geth body count would make you his hero."

"Me?" he asked, laughing softly. "I'm not the one who salvaged galaxy-saving information from a geth memory core, or the one who sent a geth frigate on a death plunge from a skyscraper by chopping off one of its legs with a door."

"Welll... okay. I _am_ good, aren't I?"

Grinning, he squeezed her hand. "The best." He turned his gaze back to the hologram. "Kaidan thought so, too. When he lost his shields and you boosted them with your own just in time to save him from that sniper shot, it was all he talked about over dinner."

"Really?" she asked shyly, looking over at the memorial. "I just remember him arguing with me about whose omni-tool was better."

"He probably knew that if he told you how great you were, you wouldn't be able to keep quiet about it and you two would end up being the subject of scuttlebutt."

That particular word for shipboard gossip had confused the hell out of her for a week before she'd figured out what it meant. "What do you mean?"

Smirking, he raised a brow at her. "It only took one chat with Liara before Ash was cluing me in about scuttlebutt saying I had a thing for our new asari recruit. Imagine if people heard that quiet old Kaidan was singing your praises."

"...Oh." Tali blushed furiously, fingers tensing upon his arm beneath his hand. Gossip was common among quarians, though they usually treated it more as entertainment than gospel. Still, she hadn't been particularly entertained when chat about whether Shepard preferred Liara or Ashley started making the rounds. Though whether her discomfort was because of either possibility or because she hadn't been in the running, she wasn't sure. "Yes, well, I think the crew was too busy gossiping about you and Liara and Ashley to worry about Kaidan and a quarian."

"Don't remind me," he said, groaning quietly. "It nearly drove me mad. I was tempted to plant a kiss on Wrex just to change the subject."

Tali blinked hard. Shepard was good at the deadpan, but sometimes he did do crazy things. "What? Wrex?"

"Why not?" he asked with a shrug. "You've got to admit, he's practically the perfect krogan. And he's got those scars across his lips like I do. We're practically a matched set."

She could only stare, jaw agape, too stunned to speak. To Shepard's credit, his face was casually impassive for almost five seconds before his lips twitched and he snickered.

"You make it too easy sometimes, Tali," he said, quiet laughter escaping while he grinned at her.

"_Bosh'tet,"_ she muttered, trying in vain to tug her hand free from his, her cheeks burning with embarrassment. "Maybe you should have tried. He would have eaten you."

"Well, I thought about Joker, but he's got that scraggly beard. It'd probably itch like crazy," he said deadpan, getting a barely suppressed snicker from her. "And Garrus doesn't have lips. If I'm going to kiss a dextro, she has to have lips."

Tali stiffened again, her eyes opening wide. "That... um, I think that rules out turians."

"So it does," he said, nodding. Seemingly oblivious to her onset of squirming, he watched as Ashley hesitantly approached. Glancing sidelong at Tali, he smiled faintly. "Back to work." He gave her hand a brief squeeze and rose, stepping up to Ashley and returning her salute.

"Skipper, I..."

He interrupted her with an upraised hand, his voice quiet. "I know what you're going to say, Ash, but just answer me this: would you rather Abby, Lynn and Sarah were the ones crying here today?"

The mention of her sisters made her stiffen, brown eyes opening wide at the thought. "God, no! But-"

"But a half-dozen salarians made it home, too, Ash," he reminded her, laying a hand on her shoulder. "He died for the mission and Kirrahe's team, not just you." Some of the tension melted away from her face, but she was still stiff and silent when he continued. "You and Kaidan both had the guts to sacrifice yourselves for the mission and the team. But if you keep moping about something out of your hands, I'll get your orders to OCS yanked."

His direct statement struck a spark, Ashley's eyes flying open as she stiffened and pulled back from his touch. "What? Commander, I am not-"

"Yes, you are," he interrupted, frowning. "I knew him for three years. Fought beside him. Trained beside him. He saved my life a day after we first met, and I ended up costing him his. But I'm not going to dishonor the sacrifice he chose by letting his death drag me down." She snapped her mouth shut when he narrowed his eyes at her in warning. "If there's any blame to take, it belongs to me. I accepted it when I got my commission. If you can't handle that responsibility, then you can spend the rest of your career as a Gunnery Chief."

Ashley recoiled at that, her displeasure at that idea written on her face. Shepard resisted the urge to smile. "If you ask me, though, that's a waste of your potential. Kirrahe agrees." Turning, he started walking toward the exit, Tali rising to accompany him. But he paused halfway there and turned back to Ashley. "And so did Kaidan."

When Garrus and Liara came up to Ashley a few minutes later, they found her staring contemplatively down at the orders on her omni-tool, a tiny smile on her face.

* * *

The Presidium was no more or less damaged than any of the wards, but even smashed storefronts and midnight blues pieces of Sovereign's wreckage did little to detract from the peaceful atmosphere. The cool air and artificial blue sky had long been one of Shepard's favorite parts about the immense and ancient station, but he took little note of it in the wake of Kaidan's memorial service. That sacrifice seemed in danger of being in vain when Hackett and Anderson relayed the Council's instructions.

"The Omega Nebula," Shepard repeated, his tone deceptively even. "Deep in Terminus space, nowhere near the Perseus Veil or the geth incursion into the Armstrong Cluster." He shifted his stare from Anderson to Hackett. "And Alliance Command has no problem with this, Admiral?"

Hackett couldn't entirely suppress his grimace, nodding. "I'm afraid so. I'll be straight with you, Shepard; both the Council and Command are already backpedaling. They're blaming the attack on the geth and claiming Sovereign was nothing more than an experimental dreadnought of their own creation. A few ship disappearances seems to be all the excuse they need to get you of the Citadel for a while so they can downplay the Reaper angle."

Shepard shook his head in disgust, rising from his seat and staring out at the Presidium below Anderson's new office. "I'm not surprised the Council is pretending to buy this bullshit. But Alliance Command?" He spun on Hackett, fixing him with a sharp stare. "What the hell are they thinking? It's not their jobs to keep galactic peace..." His voice trailed off and his eyes unfocused, then closed. Snorting, he shook his head. "That's it, isn't it? Getting along with the Council has become their priority, not preventing mass extinction."

Anderson grit his teeth at the tension between the Alliance Navy's newest commander-in-chief and humanity's first Spectre, the latter toeing the line of insubordination. Rising, he held up a hand to his protege. "Hold on, Shepard. You have a point, but you know neither of us are going to give up on this."

Shepard slowly relaxed, the tension bleeding off while his scowl softened to a frown. "True enough, but both of you are still surrounded by ass-covering types who've never faced a crisis their hairstylist couldn't fix." He turned to Anderson. "You're going to have every politician from Udina down to teenage interns trying to railroad you into doing what _they_ want. I put you into this crap job because you're the only one who has the balls to tell them to go to hell. You're going to have to bludgeon pretty hard to get any traction on this." Glancing aside at Hackett, he nodded to him. "And so are you, Admiral."

Anderson chuckled, walking to a cabinet to grab a bottle and three glasses. "I had a feeling you'd start handing out advice to me one day. I just didn't expect it to be so soon. Or without a 'sir' thrown in here and there."

Shepard finally cracked a tiny smile, folding his arms over his armored chest and leaning against the balcony railing. "It's a damn shame you got stuck with Saren. Being a shadow agent has its perks. Even if Admiral Mikhailovich nearly exploded when I told him he couldn't inspect the Normandy."

Hackett and Anderson's brows nearly touched their hairlines. "How the hell did I not hear about that?" the admiral asked. "Mikhailovich can be pretty... vocal."

Shepard shrugged. "I told him he was welcome to take a _tour. _...A very detailed tour."

Anderson laughed, passing over a glass. "I wonder if there's still time to recommend you take this job instead of me."

"Not a chance." Nodding his thanks to Anderson, Shepard took a sip of brandy and looked down at one of the larger pieces of Sovereign by the lake. "Anyways, I'll compromise. We'll make a quick pass through the systems in Omega, but then I'm heading back to Ilos ahead of schedule. I need to talk to that Prothean VI again."

Hackett exchanged a glance with Anderson, frowning. "The Council was quick to sweep you under the rug once already, Shepard. Pushing on this could give you headaches from both them and the Alliance."

Shepard fixed the admiral with a familiar implacable gaze. "I'll cross that bridge when I get to it," he said. "Besides, as long as I'm in the ranks of the Spectres, I don't technically answer to the Alliance and the Normandy belongs to me. And if I want to get even more technical, the Council's instructions are to investigate the geth threat. Considering how much time they spent on Ilos, I can chalk our trip up to research on their motives."

Ignoring Hackett's frown, Anderson sighed and dropped into the seat behind his desk. "That's a fine line, Shepard. Fortunately, the media's made sure your reputation can protect you... to an extent. Just be careful not to burn any bridges."

Shepard fixed his mentor with a predatory smile. "I blow bridges with demolitions, Anderson. No point in giving your enemies any warning before you bring the world crashing down on their heads." Downing the rest of his drink in one swallow, he shrugged and shifted his gaze to Hackett. "But I see your point, Admiral. This is too important to be ruined by diplomatic ass-covering, but I really don't want to have to end up going rogue again to save the galaxy from going to hell."

"Yes, let's try to avoid that," Hackett agreed dryly. "I have enough paperwork to deal with already."

Glancing down at his omni-tool, Shepard frowned lightly. "Speaking of paperwork, I have to sign off on the Normandy's weapons load before we get underway." Setting his glass down on a table, he shook Hackett's hand and turned to Anderson with a wry smile. "Off I go again. Any words of wisdom?"

The councilor shook his hand, grinning. "As a matter of fact, yeah: don't get yourself killed. That's just more paperwork for us."

The three men shared a laugh before Shepard headed for the exit, pausing in the door to glance back over his shoulder. "Admiral, good luck. Can't think of anyone I'd rather see as our commander than you. And Anderson? You're welcome. See you in a few weeks."

With a devilish grin, Shepard slipped out the door.

* * *

There had been happier moments in his life, but he considered the moment that they slipped quietly out of dock to begin their geth hunting mission one of the greatest reliefs in galactic history, despite the stupidity of his orders. It was, at least, the simplest way to avoid politicians and the media. The Normandy hit the second mass relay on their journey during night watch and even Joker was asleep, but Shepard sat alone in the hangar atop the Mako they'd salvaged from Feros, gazing at Wrex and Kaidan's empty lockers while he lost himself in memories.

_"I used to enjoy being transferred. New faces, new sights, new experiences. Guess you've grown on me, old man," Shepard said to Anderson before he took a sip of his beer with a grin. He'd just finished N4 and N5 training but was being transferred from the cruiser Anchorage where Anderson was XO to the dreadnought Orizaba._

_"Getting sentimental in your old age, Lieutenant?" Anderson chuckled and popped a pretzel into his mouth while they enjoyed the view of the Presidium lake from a cafe that overlooked it. "Well, don't worry. Next year, you'll be off the ship again on all the truly dangerous missions. And if you don't screw up too badly, you'll have a red and white patch to stick on your uniform when you're done with it. Just try not to get blown up. I didn't put all that time and effort into you to have to do it all over again with another hotheaded young man."_

_Anderson's words and earnest grin made Shepard laugh and shrug his shoulders. "No promises, sir. Making life hard on you was one of the best parts about being your marine detachment commander."_

_"Uh huh. Just don't bring that damn violin with you when you report in for your N6 assignment. Torturing the crew of the Anchorage was one thing, but -"_

_"Hey!" Shepard interrupted with a smirk. "Only in the hangar and only on night watch. Besides," he chuckled, "I wasn't terrible for that long. I played the cello as a kid, remember?"_

Shepard glanced over to his right, where his violin sat in its case. As a child he had spent hours listening to his mother play and came to miss the sounds when she took up an active duty posting in the fleet. She had offered to teach him, but in typical young male fashion he had refused, calling it a girl's instrument much to her amusement. His father had cleverly recommended the deeper notes of the cello and before long he found himself playing with his mother when she was home. That had ended when Mindoir was attacked, and it had been almost a decade before he touched another instrument. He occasionally entertained the idea of trying the guitar or keyboard, but there was something comforting about the familiar sound.

After tightening the bow and tuning the strings with the help of his omni-tool he began to play while another memory returned to him.

_Too often he forgot his mother's birthday, cursing each time he did before forgetting all about it once more. For a year after the raid on Mindoir they'd been closer than ever, but after he'd enlisted he responded more and more infrequently to her emails. After being commissioned he'd grown busier, and Elysium and Akuze had left him even further withdrawn. He had known it wasn't fair to a woman who'd lost her husband and daughter, knew he was only making things worse on himself, but focusing on his career served as too good of a distraction and an outlet. But that wall was too fragile to last forever. When it came crashing down he could hardly understand the man who had been hiding behind it. It had certainly not been the person his mother had raised._

_It finally felt as if things were back in balance in his life, but there were a few transgressions to make up for. After a moment's wait, his mother's face sprang to life on the viewscreen of the portable terminal he'd brought down to the hangar of the Anchorage behind the M-29 Grizzly, and he couldn't help but smile. "Happy birthday, Mom," he said simply, rewarded by the sight of her tired expression brightening into a wide smile, a sparkle lighting up her cobalt eyes._

_"Well, those are a few words I haven't heard in a while," she replied wryly, enjoying the way he rubbed the back of his neck in discomfort and chuckled awkwardly._

_"Yeah, I know. I'm a horrible son. But I might be able to make it up to you a little. Hold on."_

_He turned away for a moment, then sat back up and lifted the instrument to his neck with a wink despite the anxiety turning his stomach. Apparently one or two of his youthful flaws had returned, but he summoned the will to draw the bow across the strings. He tried not to let the tears that welled in her eyes distract him, correctly anticipating the smile that also spread across her lips._

He'd made a few mistakes playing live when he lost his focus on the projection of the sheet music to enjoy the sight of her smile, and a part of him felt ridiculous to be an experienced combat veteran playing as a novice musician to his proud mother, but learning the instrument had been therapeutic and calming. Fortunately, a few years and many late nights in the hangar had given him ample time to get it right. He played through another of his mother's favorite pieces without error, recording it on his omni-tool to be sent as one of her next birthday presents. With scarcely a pause he moved on to another, unmindful of the opening door to engineering and the quiet footsteps that crossed the hangar.

Tali sat and leaned back against a wheel, wrapping her arms around her drawn up knees while she closed her eyes to listen rapturously. Unlike the bittersweet melody of her ancestors that had been playing in the geth base in the Armstrong cluster where they had recovered her pilgrimage gift, the notes emanating from the strings were warm and bright, coaxing a smile from her lips. Shepard had recommended music to fill the uncomfortable silence that had kept her awake, but she stuck to more rhythmic electronic beats and had never heard anything quite like his playing before.

It was a few minutes later, when she blinked a tear from her eye, that she realized his playing had slowed and deepened into a mournful melody that brought some of her sadder memories to mind, just as the lament in the geth base had. That day had been rather bittersweet, much like the music he was playing. Her excitement at finding such an immense cache of data had been tempered by the knowledge that presenting it would require leaving the Normandy. She had been working up the nerve to ask him for it when he'd simply brought a copy down to engineering and placed it in her palm with a smile, laying his hand atop hers before he slipped away. She'd stared at it in silence while the door to engineering hissed quietly shut behind him. Despite his smile, she could have sworn she saw sadness in his eyes before he'd turned away. It was a contradiction she'd never quite come to understand.

She remembered when an agent of the Shadow Broker had contacted them after they'd shut down a Cerberus base, asking to exchange the data in a deal an admiral had agreed to. But despite their mission being entirely self-funded at the time, Shepard shut that offer down without a moment's consideration while at the same time he handed over classified data to her. And then there was Noveria, where Shepard had coldly gunned down the crooked security sergeant in Synthetic Insights but had shown kindness to Liara's indoctrinated dying mother. But had it been for Benezia's benefit, or Liara's? Or was it simply who he was?

"Oh. Hey, Tali." She jumped at the sound of his voice, blushing fiercely and tilting her head back to gaze up at him. He was peering over the top of the Mako down at her, his instrument resting across his lap. She hadn't even been aware that he'd finished playing, and now he was rubbing the back of his neck in a gesture she'd learned indicated his discomfort or embarrassment. Cursing herself mentally, Tali stood quickly, entwining her fingers nervously at her waist. "Shepard, um... sorry, I just..."

He was as familiar with the significance of her twiddling fingers as she was with his rubbing of his neck, but her own gesture was rather endearing, making him him smile despite his discomfort. "It's okay. Old habit. I play in cargo holds or hangars so I don't disturb anyone."

She didn't believe for a second that it was to avoid disturbing anyone, but in a culture where privacy was at a premium, it was deeply ingrained that you tried your best to avoid interrupting it when someone sought it out. Her fingers only squirmed faster as she shook her head. "No, I'm interrupting. I - I'm sorry, I'll go-"

"No, come on up here. I could use some company." He managed a smile, setting the bow down and extending his hand down toward her. Not for the first time, the feel of his fingers on hers gave her an almost electric thrill, and his strong arm pulled her up to take a seat beside him. She turned her head toward him while her fingers once more entwined together atop her lap, and she saw the warmth in his blue eyes while he smiled at her. Warmth, and a hint of sadness she'd frequently noticed ever since their first meeting. Another in the long list of contradictions that was Shepard, but the mystery had been as intriguing as any elusive engineering problem.

He held her gaze for a moment in silence and then retrieved the bow, once more lifting the violin to his neck and closing his eyes to draw it across the strings in a slow, hauntingly beautiful melody that sent tears trickling down her cheeks before her head came to rest softly upon his shoulder.

* * *

Ten minutes later, the violin and bow were resting in their case. They sat in silence, his head resting against the hooded helmet that still occupied his shoulder. Many times before they had sat in companionable silence at the mess hall table while working on their omni-tools, but something was different. Tali felt the weight of the OSD containing the geth data that would end her Pilgrimage in one of her arm pockets. For weeks it had been a reminder that their journey together would come to an end, a subtle warning not to get too attached.

Staring at her locker, Tali smiled in memory of an event that had left her outraged at the time. Shepard had called her to the hangar to join him on a mineral survey when they had nothing else going on. Happy to have some time alone with him, despite the anti-nausea medication she had to take to alleviate the Mako's horrible ride, she'd opened her locker to grab her weapons. She'd reached instinctively, but her shotgun went clattering onto the deck while she shrieked a moment later. The little imitation rachni that had been planted in her locker had led to Shepard and Garrus clambering atop the Mako to escape her, both of them laughing uproariously.

During the survey she had maintained an icy silence despite the amusement that slowly took over, choosing to make a remorseful Shepard suffer. But it had also given her time to wonder about the man behind the armor and titles, the one who lost a parent and sister and dozens of his men, who had a prothean nightmare burned into his mind and an impossible task set upon his shoulders. For all he'd gone through, he was so much different than her distant, unhappy father. But for each sad thought of Rael'Zorah, she had a happy one revolving around the commander.

"Shepard?" She broke the silence quietly, tilting her head to gaze up at him.

"Hm?" he responded, sounding quiet and content.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Here it comes," he replied lightly, turning his head to flash her a smile. "Sooner or later everyone asks what my first name really is."

_Damn it, he just had to remind me!_ Tali had been dying of curiosity, but she knew better than to try to fight that particular battle again. Laughing softly, she shook her head where it lay on his shoulder. "No, I know better than that. I wonder if Liara even knows it, and she got into your head." No sooner had she spoken the words than she winced, her jealousy at that melding never completely faded. She pushed it aside. "No, um... well, I don't know. I mean, you've gone through so many terrible things in your life. Mindoir, Akuze, Elysium..." She paused, waiting for him to pull away or cut her off by saying he didn't want to talk about it. Instead, she only felt his head nestle more comfortably upon her own and heard his slow breathing continue undisturbed. "..And I know how it hurt when we lost Kaidan." She shivered softly at the memory.

_He was the most expressive human she'd ever met, with those crooked little grins and heart-melting smiles, the determined set of his jaw and the cold glares, the inquisitive tilt of his head so like a quarian when he was genuinely interested in something. But this was an expression she had never seen before. All the tension had drained from his face, but he was staring at the viewscreen, oblivious to even Liara and Garrus' gentle touches on his arms that vainly offered comfort or tried futilely to pull him away He watched the fireball spread and the mushroom cloud form until the image flickered and died away as they went out of range. He finally moved, turning and making for the elevator in long, marching steps, but as he passed her he turned his head and locked eyes with her, and only her, for just a moment, a haunted emptiness in what were usually piercing azure eyes._

She remembered the tears that had rolled down her cheeks, but at that moment they hadn't been for Kaidan.

"Tali?" he murmured after a long moment of silence. "You kinda faded out on me there. You aren't watching a movie inside that helmet, are you?"

"What? Oh! No... sorry." She finally couldn't resist fidgeting, her fingers anxiously entwining at her waist. "I guess I just wish I knew how you can go through all that and still smile." She sighed quietly, staring down at her hands. "I mean, I can't remember hearing my father laugh even once after mother died. He was always focused on his work, but when we lost her, he just..."

"It seems like he doesn't really live, just kind of... exists?" His hand slid onto her lap to take her own in his but instead of a thrill, she felt warmth when he rubbed his thumb along the smoothness of her glove. His shoulder shrugged lightly beneath her head. "Well, it's different for everyone, I imagine. But in my case, we actually had that in common."

Tali blinked, lifting her head to look at him. Smiling faintly, he shrugged and looked down at where his finger was idly drawing a pattern on the back of her hand. "A psychiatrist explained it to me once. Assuming humans and quarians react similarly, people respond to grief in different ways. In my case, I turned into a bitter young man with a hell of a lot of rage. Your father focuses on his work; I focused on becoming a soldier. Then becoming an officer. And so on, replacing one goal with another." Lifting his eyes, he smiled humorlessly. "Actually, your father's coping mechanism is probably healthier than mine was. It sounds like he works to benefit your people. I mostly wanted to kill pirate scum, and the more eyes they had, the better."

_Keelah._ Unable to meet his gaze, she looked down at where their hands entwined, five and three. At first she had found his differences fascinating, but she hadn't really expected that looking deeper would lead to any unpleasant revelations. "That's... hard to imagine." She could think of nothing else to say.

"Even after I bloodied my knuckles on the Mako when Balak got away, or when we were taking out those Cerberus bases?" he asked quietly. "Hate is ugly, Tali. I wish I'd managed to get rid of it entirely. But that's all I was for a while; an angry kid who wanted revenge that forgot how to smile." She looked up hesitantly to see him staring thoughtfully off at a corner of the dim hangar. "I stopped speaking to my mother after a while. I realized that talking to me always made her sad. I was all she had left and she wanted her little boy back, but all she had was a stranger. I hated that I felt guilty about that."

_Curiosity killed the cat. Is that the human saying?_ The thought of a man in such opposition to the one she knew was hard to accept. Still, as much as she'd come to know him, she'd longed for more, and she was getting what she asked for. Hesitantly she laid her other hand atop his to enfold it in warmth, drawing a soft smile from his lips before he continued.

"Anyways. After Elysium, people called me a hero. After Akuze, I was a survivor." The sarcasm in his words was weary and a touch bitter. "But I was no poster boy, even if the brass painted me as one. Hell, by that point I was barely human." Frowning, he rubbed at the back of his neck, not meeting her gaze. "I was furious at missing out on a retaliatory raid against the batarians while I was at ICT – special forces training, the whole N7 thing. I was ready to resign in frustration when I met Anderson." Smiling wryly, he turned toward her. "I'm not sure if he's a natural parent or just a masochist. Or maybe it was just because he's seen some nasty things in his time, too. He knew just what to say to get to me less than two hours after we met. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and didn't like what I saw."

Chuckling, Shepard rubbed absently at his unshaven jaw. "I hated him when he left me standing there on the Citadel, feeling raw and unsatisfied. I still hated him two weeks later when I suddenly got transferred to the Anchorage where he was the XO. He was relentless. I barely got any sleep between standing duty and the extra training he shoved on me. Oh, and the sparring sessions in the hangar where he kept kicking my ass." The return of his broad grin made Tali smile, her reservations beginning to slip away with the progression of his story.

"Hold on," she interrupted, laughing. "You're telling me _you_ got your ass kicked? By a man twenty years older than you?"

Pulling his hand from hers, he folded his arms indignantly and glared playfully at her. "Hey, I've kicked your ass plenty and I have seven years on you."

_Bosh'tet._ Smirking, she folded her arms in a mirror of his pose. "It's not my fault you have that human male upper body strength thing. But if you remember, I kicked _your_ ass in that asari grappling."

"No, you just squeezed me into submission. You nearly crushed my hips with those legs of yours," he reminded her, azure eyes glimmering with mischief. Blushing fiercely behind her visor at that particular memory, she tried to ignore the heat in her cheeks and the warmth that swept through her body.

"I... yes, well. Keep going or I'll do it again." Her mouth instantly snapped shut. _Oh, keelah, did I really just say that?_

"Oh? Is that a threat, or a promise?"

Tali's jaw fell open. The _bosh'tet_ was smirking, one eyebrow arched expectantly. Chakwas was right; he really could be a shameless flirt, even if he was probably only doing it to get a rise out of her. Just like that comment about kissing dextros with lips. Clearing her tightened throat, she poked him firmly in the ribs. "If you don't want a bunch of fake rachni in your bed, you'll finish the story."

Apparently he decided to ignore the opportunity for more teasing she'd left him, as he just rubbed his side and chuckled. "Well, long story short, he kept riling me up until I started to crack. Then, all of a sudden, he laid off and I got reassigned to my own quarters. I found that in the footlocker." Inclining his head toward the cased violin, he smiled and leaned back against the Mako's turret. "I'm not sure why, but I suddenly became obsessed with it. My mother played the violin when I was a kid and I played a similar instrument. I wasn't starting from scratch, but it took me quite a few weeks of playing in the hangar during night watch before I got all the way through that last piece I played."

Tali reclined beside him, folding her hands on her stomach and watching while he stared distantly off at the hangar bulkhead. Her curiosity, fully returned, had escalated into fascination, and she waited patiently for him to continue.

"Playing is how I unwind and sort through my thoughts," he said after a long moment. "It clears my mind better than exercise does. Not sure why. Each time I couldn't get it right I'd go to bed frustrated, swearing never to pick the damn thing up again. But there I was the next night after sleeping like the dead, playing all over again. I think I grinned like an idiot when I finally got it right." He glanced at her momentarily but looked away and shifted uncomfortably, chuckling weakly. "Ah, right before I... broke down crying. And then fell asleep on the deck."

Her eyes flew open wide at that. The thought of Commander Shepard, Hero of the Blitz, Savior of the Citadel, first human Spectre, lying on a cold hangar floor all alone with his grief, was almost unfathomable. She could only stare, torn between disbelief and heartbreak. When he slowly looked her way, rubbing the back of his neck, she shook her head and smiled. As much as she'd wanted to get revenge and render him awkward and uncomfortable for a change, she found it too cute to abuse. "Don't worry," she said warmly, taking his hand. "I promise I won't use it for blackmail... until you pull another prank on me."

Laughing, he slipped his hand free and wrapped his arm around her shoulders to squeeze her lightly. "That's comforting, thanks."

"You're welcome," she replied, feeling the familiar warmth in her cheeks again. Despite it, she slipped her own arm behind his back and laid her head on his shoulder with a quiet sigh of contentment at the light stroke of his palm on her arm. "So..."

"Right. Well, Anderson found me there and apparently he just sat there with me all night. I remember what he said when I woke up and saw him there, frantically trying to salvage my dignity: 'You're not done yet, son.' " Shepard chuckled softly. "And he was right. I felt like a damn baby, but I'd finally hit my breaking point. You don't keep all that bottled up for years without consequences. When I woke up again, my throat sore as hell, he put me on leave and sent me to meet my mother on the Citadel. As soon as she hugged me, I started up again. If I was quarian, I would have been spaced for wasting so much water."

Tali laughed softly despite the moisture that collected in her eyes, twisting her neck to gaze up at him. Smiling down at her, he shrugged and squeezed her warmly in his arm. "Anyways. I guess it was my turn to tell you a long story. But the short version? I think I realized that locking everything in hurt me worse than letting it go, and I couldn't live like that anymore. And it wasn't fair to my mother, my sister, my father, or all the soldiers whose dog tags I had to send home to their families. They were dead, and I was alive, but I wasn't doing much with it. I doubt they would have been happy with me for a few years there."

"They'd be proud of you," Tali promised, smiling up at him.

"Nah," he said with a grin. "I think they'd probably scratch their heads and say 'How the hell did this broken _bosh'tet_ end up helping a quarian girl put an end to the Saren menace?' "

No, she decided, the man she knew wasn't the one he'd described. Three months spent with him had provided enough evidence of that. Tali smirked and lifted her head, turning to gaze at him evenly. "I don't think you can kill a dead turian revived by creepy Reaper tech, Shepard. And you're not broken anymore. Scarred and beat up, maybe," she teased, making him grin.

"Semantics," he contested, winking. "And I'm not as bad off as Wrex. But I'll always be a bit broken, Tali. Normal humans don't laugh alongside a krogan battlemaster while they're both dripping with blood and I'm pretty sure they're not supposed to execute helpless salarians in their cage." His face fell into a subtle frown, as did hers. Despite agreeing with his decision to put the ruined, indoctrinated salarians out of their misery on Virmire, it had still felt almost like murder. Even Wrex had been grim when they had finished.

"Maybe you're right," Tali admitted, but her embrace only tightened while she snuggled into his side and laid her head back on his shoulder, comforted by his warmth. "Sometimes I do wonder if all our choices were the right ones. But we don't all admire you because everything comes easy. It's because you always seem to make the right choices, no matter how hard they are, and you accept the consequences. You take it on yourself so others don't have to."

"That's my job, Tali," he said quietly. "It's what all decent officers do. Please don't make it sound like I'm some sort of larger-than-life figure who-"

"Shepard, please." Her voice was soft but firm while she reached across to put a gloved finger to his lips. "We know. You're just a man, flaws and all. But believe me, we all know you'll do anything to protect your crew and your friends. It inspires a lot of loyalty."

Smiling faintly, he reached up and took her hand in his, lowering them to rest clasped together on his chest. "So would you. But I'm too stubborn to give up my power that easily."

Tali giggled but said nothing for a long moment while they relaxed in silence against the Mako's sloped turret, the Normandy thrumming softly around them like a heartbeat. Her auditory pickups left her just barely conscious of his own and she was tempted to slide down and move her head to his chest to hear it more clearly, but she bit her lip and reluctantly stayed put. One unanswered question suddenly sprang to mind, and she saw an opportunity for a little payback. Putting a soft, serious note in her voice, she spoke quietly. "Shepard, I've been meaning to ask you something..."

"...Yes?" She felt him tense and was faintly aware of his heartbeat accelerating slightly.

"...So where did the instrument you found in your locker come from?"

He'd been holding his breath, but he expelled it with a laugh and shook his head slowly. "Anderson. Who else? I think it was a conspiracy between him and my mother."

Tali grinned wide beneath her visor. It wasn't what she _really_ wanted to ask, but she wouldn't ruin the moment. "You can write in your autobiography one day about the violin that saved the galaxy."

He turns his head to grin at her, squeezing her hand in his where they lay on his chest. "I'll have to include it alongside the smart old man, the disgruntled ex-cop, and the beautiful quarian girl on her Pilgrimage."

Her heart skipped a beat. Only her mother and father had ever called her beautiful, even if her people were hidden away behind tinted glass and it came from biased sources. Laughing awkwardly, she shook her head on his shoulder. "Very funny. _Bosh'tet._"

"What's funny?" he asked, the familiar playfulness back in his voice.

She nudged her shoulder against his as if giving him a shove and lifted her head to smirk his way. Somehow, he never seemed to have trouble recognizing that expression. "For all you know, I could look like Wrex under this helmet."

He tilted his head and blinked. "Wait, what? You're wearing a helmet?"

_"Bosh'tet!"_ she exclaimed, laughing and shoving him again. He slid along the sloped turret to end up on his back with a laugh of his own.

"Quarian princess," he retorted, grinning wickedly up at her, fully aware of how she hated to hear that.

"Damn it, I told you not to call me that!" she cried, failing to suppress her mirth while she pounced atop him and struggled to grab his wrists. They both shook with laughter while he fought her hold but he ended up straddled by sixty kilos of lithe quarian, hands pinned beside his head. He ceased his struggling when their eyes locked and their smiles faded away. She was suddenly aware of the intimacy of their position, just as she had been a month prior when her exultation at beating him had been replaced by heated anxiety.

"Wow. Taken down by the quarian girl. That's not going to look good in the performance reviews." Tali jumped at the sound of the dry, flanging voice, twisting to see Garrus leaning against the bulkhead by the elevator, arms folded while he looked on in amusement. Beside him stood Ashley and Liara, the former laughing. The asari had an expression on her face somewhere between a smirk and a grimace.

"Oh, keelah," Tali muttered, releasing Shepard's wrists to plant a palm on her visor.

Beneath him, the commander just smiled and folded his hands beneath his head, gazing up at the ceiling. "Nice to see you've got my back, Garrus."

"Nah, we just wanted to see Tali get you on your back," Garrus quipped before breaking into a snicker. Tali felt her cheeks progress from warm to fiery at the sight of Ashley's broad grin and the sound of her laughter.

* * *

Tali had a penchant for blushing, he knew, despite the concealment of her visor. He did not. But he'd felt warmth rise to his cheeks when Tali had managed to convince him to play some more after Joker came down to join the others at their seats by the lockers and weapons bench with a few bottles they'd grabbed on the Citadel. Only the bright, eager note in her voice had kept him from making excuses, and he smiled while he watched her sip turian wine through a sterilized straw. Induction port. Whatever it was, it was rather adorable. It was a rather stark contrast to the scrappy fighter who bravely faced down krogan and geth, or the woman whose touch made his heartbeat speed rapidly. The memory of being pinned distracted him into hesitating for a moment before he quickly recovered, his face warming even further.

Fortunately, his friends were a good audience. Even Joker, who was unusually subdued beside Garrus. Liara sniffled occasionally with closed eyes, no doubt remembering her mother, supported by Ashley's comforting arm around her shoulders. The gunnery chief had surprised him with her knowledge of poetry, and she apparently enjoyed music without pounding bass to accompany it.

When he finally put the violin back into its case and took the bottle Liara handed him, he took a sip and shut off his omni-tool, which he'd realized had been recording since before Tali had sneaked in. "Shepard, I had no idea you were a musician," Liara admitted with a smile, gazing up at him with moist sapphire eyes while he shrugged.

"That's being generous," he said dryly, taking another sip of wine. Tali gave him a light bump with her shoulder to express her disapproval at his modesty, but he could only summon a weak smile in response. When Tali's head dipped slightly, he knew she'd realized his discomfort.

"Musicians play in public all over Thessia. Believe me when I say you would draw a crowd," Liara assured him, beaming warmly. He usually loved the asari's smiles, but he took little notice of it at that moment.

"Gotta agree, Skipper," Ash encouraged him, but he only chuckled again, rubbing the back of his neck and hopping off the Mako. He passed the bottle to her.

"Thanks, Ash. You guys have fun. I need to file some paperwork. If you're still up, I'll see you later." He stepped into the elevator and glanced at Tali with a small smile before the doors closed. As soon as they did, he sighed in relief. He hated paperwork, but it was far preferable at that moment. While he'd felt uncomfortably warm playing for the others, he'd been embarrassed for only a few brief moments when he'd realized Tali had been listening. "Wonder why?" he muttered as he stepped off the elevator and made for his cabin.

Back in the hangar, Joker guffawed. "Was.. was Shepard _embarrassed_? Nice job, Liara! I've never seen that before!"

Tali was still blushing beneath her helmet when she mumbled something about the wine making her sleepy. Sliding off the Mako, she made her way to the elevator while Joker and Ash shared a laugh, and Garrus and Liara exchanged a glance of their own.

When Tali disappeared behind the closing doors, Garrus scraped a talon lightly along a mandible thoughtfully. "Joker, why is it that you think Shepard being embarrassed is a _good_ thing?"

"Oh come on, I was just kidding. Besides, he didn't look embarrassed when Tali was telling us about his playing before we... huh." Joker raised a brow with a grin at the revelation and looked over at Garrus and Ashley, who only shrugged.

Liara didn't look as amused as Joker did at that moment.

* * *

_This is a bad idea. He probably wants to be alone, just like he did before you snuck up and intruded on his privacy._

Tali's hand paused near the comm panel.

_Then why did he keep playing without a hint of embarrassment? And why did he let you cuddle up against him like that?_

Her finger pressed the button.

_Oh, keelah, this is a _really _bad id-_

"Come in," she heard his voice call quietly through the comm panel, and the door slid open. Hesitantly, she stepped up to the threshold and peered in, but he was nowhere in sight.

"Um... Shepard?"

"Over here, Tali," he answered, and she took another step inside. She saw him off to her right, sitting in the corner against the wall with his forearms draped on his knees. He gazed up at her with a soft but warm smile. "Got tired of the party?"

She shook her head and he watched her fingers play nervously over each other at her waist. "N-no. I just... um, what are you doing on the floor?"

_Why are you questioning the captain of your ship in his own quarters, Tali'Zorah? What's wrong with you?_

He shrugged and gave her a wan smile, gesturing for her to take a seat beside him. "Old habit I picked up on... well, a long time ago. You'll notice I never sit with my back to the door, either."

Tali was hesitant, but she walked over and slid down to take a seat beside him half a meter away, wrapping her arms around her knees while she stared at a frayed spot on the back of her glove. "I did notice that, but you're a soldier, so... um..." _Change the subject._ "Why are your quarters so... empty?"

"Tali," he said gently, "what's wrong? You didn't come here to criticize an inefficient use of space." He smiled encouragingly, but her blush refused to abate.

"No! I would never criticize... oh, keelah. I'm sorry!" She finally managed to blurt it out. "I shouldn't have asked you to play for the others. I just thought you needed a little encouragement, and instead I was prodding at you to... and after you told me all those hard things just so I could understand something I didn't really need to know in the first place, and-"

"Tali." She was vaguely aware that he'd said her name three times, the third just firm enough to get her attention. Shyly, she turned her head toward him, going silent while he laughed softly. "You don't have to apologize. I thought after playing for you, it wouldn't bother me. You didn't know. So you can stop apologizing, take a deep breath, and smile."

She took him literally, inhaling a deep breath. Her lips didn't move, though. His eyes narrowed slightly as if he was focusing intently on her. "You're not smiling."

"Wh-what? How do you always know?" She laughed softly, enjoying how well he could read her.

"I can just tell." He winked.

"Oh." An alarming possibility suddenly sprang to mind. "Wait! Have my visor's coatings started to fade?" She ran her fingers across the glass and started to rise. "Do you have a mirror?" She jumped when his hand slipped into hers and gently tugged her back down to a seat.

Shaking his head, he smiled. "No, Tali. Relax. I can only see the way your eyes shine and the general shape of your nose. No lips, no skin color, no... I don't know, eye creases when you smile or however it works for you." He squinted and leaned toward her a fraction. "I _am_ pretty sure you don't look like Wrex, though."

Calmed somewhat by his humor, she smirked and leaned back against the wall while he did the same. "So you were just being a flattering _bosh'tet_ earlier."

"Nope," he replied, smiling. "Humans have an expression: 'Beauty is in the eye of the beholder'. Usually people mean physical appearance, but think about the rachni. A race that sings to each other, to teach and comfort their young, to pass information through generations. They're pretty damn ugly on the outside, but there's something beautiful about them, too."

Tali had been smiling at the start of his explanation, but by the time it ended she was faintly squirming with uncertainty. What exactly was he saying?

"So my appearance...?" she asked hesitantly.

"Hm? Oh!" He started, apparently realizing what he'd implied. "No, Tali," he assured her, "I don't know what your face really looks like, but trust me, I don't think 'ugly' when I look at you. Far from it."

Tali nearly sighed with relief before his words fully processed and renewed the damn blush he kept causing. Still, she couldn't help but grin a little beneath her visor when she noticed a slight reddening of his cheek. The opportunity was too perfect to pass up. "So... what _do_ you think when you look at me?"

He turned his head, meeting her gaze in silence in what felt like an interminably long moment. "I think... I'm going to miss you when you go home," he admitted with a quiet sigh. "Part of me wishes we'd never found that geth data." Stunned, Tali watched his gaze drop back to the floor in front of him, his sadness almost palpable. He'd been a little down when Wrex had left, and when he came back from two days spent with his mother, but she hadn't expected him to voice her own thoughts in the same tone she would have used if he had been the one to pose the question.

_Keelah, _she thought, groaning mentally. Why hadn't she departed right after the battle when everything was still chaotic, before they'd spent so much time together on shore leave? She'd known the wading, the dancing, the poker games, the hour atop the Mako hadn't been wise, but she'd ignored wisdom in favor of... friendship? Attraction? Her excuse of staying on to keep hunting geth had sounded weak to even her ears, and her father had gazed at her for a long moment in what felt like suspicion before bluntly recommending she get back to her Pilgrimage. She hadn't mentioned the treasure trove of data in her pocket despite her hopes it would make him proud. She'd known it would have left her practically ordered to return. Inevitability suddenly became a lead weight in her gut.

"I'm going to miss you, too," she whispered, sighing deeply.

They sat for a few long minutes with only the sound of breathing and the humming of equipment breaking the silence. Shepard suddenly stirred, giving her a halfhearted smile while he opened up his omni-tool. "Well, you can take this home with you." He tapped a few keys and Tali opened her own holographic interface when a file transfer request chirped at her. Curious, she opened the file to see the start of Shepard's recording atop the Mako. Blinking back a pair of tears, she turned to him, seeing him smile softly. "Something to listen to if it gets too loud to sleep... wait. Got that backwards."

Shutting down her omni-tool, Tali laughed softly and snuggled in against his side, closing her eyes when she felt his arm slip around her back.

* * *

Her nightly ritual was to make one last review of the engineering systems before sleep. The thought of drifting off had become very tempting while she leaned comfortably against Shepard's side, but duty wouldn't let her surrender to blissful unconsciousness without one last systems check. He'd accompanied her to engineering, sitting against the wall and playing one of his favorite cello pieces for her while she worked. By the time she'd finished her readings, she found Shepard sound asleep where he sat at the wall. She couldn't help but smile, nestling in gently against his side to lay her head on his shoulder and listen through to the end.

When Adams came on duty in the morning, he did a double-take at the sight of his famed commander asleep against the wall with a quarian girl snuggled at his side, string music playing softly from his omni-tool. Fortunately, his skill in diplomacy far exceeded that of his friend Pressly. When Shepard awoke an hour later, an asleep arm pinned around Tali's waist, the engineer brought him a cup of tea and typed out on his omni-tool: 'Tali trouble sleeping again? You're the best, Commander.' Shepard made a note to be generous on his chief engineer's next fitrep, taking a sip and managing a helpless shrug while the lieutenant smiled and went back to work. When he felt Tali stirring, Shepard closed his eyes and did his best to look sound asleep while Adams turned away to pretend to be absorbed in his work. But Tali still blushed furiously when she extricated herself from Shepard's arm, quickly scurrying out of engineering before a blue eye peeked open. Adams and Shepard exchanged shrugs before the commander rose and took his leave, wondering if Tali would end up trying to avoid him for the rest of the day.

* * *

Tali hadn't said more than five words her entire shift, all of them to Adams who worked beside her in silence while she optimized the heat balance between the internal emissions sinks. His last attempt to talk had been to joke about how boring the frozen planet of Alchera looked while he conducted scans, but she'd barely noticed, too caught up in her internal discussion over whether to wait for lunch until Shepard took his. It wasn't until the drive core suddenly spooled up to maximum output that she broke from her trance, only to topple over when the ship jerked violently and klaxons began to sound.

"Keelah!" she shouted, rising to her feet while Adams grabbed a rebreather and hurriedly put it on. "What happened?"

"Oh, hell," he whispered, frantically typing away on the holographic keyboard. "We're under attack! Massive damage to the-"

He was interrupted when a deafening roar accompanied another horrendous buffeting that sent them both sprawling onto the deck. No sooner had they scrambled to their feet than the abandon ship alarm began to blare, oddly muffled before Tali realized that the air was venting from engineering. Eyes wide, she grabbed Adams' sleeve and yanked him toward the door, one glance at the engineering panels having told the horrible story.

"We have hull breaches and the core's unstable! We need to move!"

He didn't hesitate, sprinting over and slapping the panel. The door slid open, tugging them both violently toward it when the remaining air began to rush out into the breached hangar. Adams led the way to the elevator, shaking out a hand swollen by decompression before he smashed the panel with a fist. Two pairs of wide eyes locked for a split second, then they turned to see a gaping hole where the armor lockers had been, the edges of the rent metal glowing an angry red.

"Keelah," Tali breathed, watching gases dissipate into space through the breach. Tearing her eyes away, she swept her gaze over the hangar in search of other crew members. "I don't see anyone else!" she yelled, beginning to turn back toward the opening elevator door before something caught her eye. Adams' hand grabbed her elbow but she tugged it free and sprinted over to the Mako, snatching the object off the deck.

A minute later she helped Adams into an escape shuttle, his breathing labored while he fought the agony in his swollen limbs. Liara, Garrus, and Ashley were already inside and she looked at the empty seat, panic suddenly taking her.

"Wait! Where's Shepard? We can't leave without-"

"He's gone to get Joker!" Garrus snapped over their helmet comms. "They'll take the bridge shuttle! Hurry up and launch it!"

Tali turned to her left and lifted her hand but paused, staring out into the orange haze of the Normandy's burning interior, wondering if they were on their way back. What if something was wrong with the bridge shuttle? What if-

The Normandy rocked again, and Liara stretched out to slap the controls on her side. The doors slammed shut with a terrifying finality before the shuttle shot out into space. Tali rushed to activate the external cameras, gasping at the sight of the broken and burning Normandy tumbling helplessly through space toward Alchera's atmosphere. Still...

"The bridge looks intact!" she exclaimed with some relief. "It... _no!"_

A brilliant yellow beam sliced through the neck of the Normandy, sending the cockpit tumbling away.

"Oh, goddess," Liara breathed. All of them went silent, staring with wide eyes for what felt like an eternity.

"Yes!" Garrus suddenly shouted, the others sighing when they saw the glint of the last escape shuttle streaking away from the scattering wreckage. Reaching across, the turian lightly slapped Tali's arm. "See? Shepard's too damn stubborn to die."

Tali nodded thoughtlessly, struggling to bring her breathing back into control while Ashley maneuvered their pod to keep it on the other side of the Normandy from the immense dreadnought that had just torn it apart. After what seemed like an eternity, the jagged, misshapen thing flickered and vanished into FTL.

"Thank God, it's gone," Ashley said, exhaling a heavy breath. "Hang on, opening comms to the other shuttles." She tapped a few keys while Garrus growled low in his throat.

"Spirits help those bastards when Shepard gets a new ship. He's going to be _pissed._"

Tali wrapped her arms tighter around her cargo, nodding absently and watching Ashley with breathless anticipation.

"Joker? It's Ashley. Where does Shepard want us to rendezvous?"

Tali smiled when she heard those words, but the reply seized her heart in her chest.

"_He's... he's gone. He didn't make it out with me."_

Tali wasn't aware of her own cry, or the squeeze of Garrus' hand that left bruises on her forearm. She only sobbed violently, her entire body shaking while she gasped for breath and clutched a battered violin case to her chest.


	3. Life goes on

_Author's note:_

_Thanks for the reviews and favorites so far. It means a lot.  
_

_Writing the different characters in the time span between ME1 and ME2 is proving to be more of a challenge than I'd anticipated. Some of it is due to the fact that I get the most satisfaction out of writing the characters interacting with each other, and not by themselves. The good news is that I have over 22k words already written further ahead in the story, and those were all written in one long session that came very easily to me.  
_

_In the meantime, hope you enjoy._

* * *

Tali walked the same corridors aboard the Rayya that she had thousands of times as a child and a youth, remembering her friends alongside her or the promise of happiness to be returning to her own private space, but this time, it felt as if she was returning to a prison cell she'd managed to escape for a few, blissful months. She knew her father had officially changed his name to vas Alarei, and the fact that she would be walking into an empty home only made it worse. To her shock, when she pulled back the patterned purple tapestry that covered the entrance to her quarters, she saw him standing there awaiting her. _He probably just sleeps here out of habit and just woke up. He wouldn't bother meeting me._ The thought was bitter in her heavy heart, but she still took a hesitant step toward him as the tapestry fell back to cover the entrance. She was crying as soon as his arms enfolded her and drew her tight, while even her stoic, withdrawn father felt the tears brimming in his own eyes.

After ten minutes of sobbing, he still hadn't let her go, but he'd guided her to the sleeping pad and drew her to lean against him and bury her visor against his neck, in the same way he'd quieted her nightmares as a child. _Oh, my poor little girl. I've been a terrible father. All this must remind her of her mother, and her old friend Hela who died in that terrible accident._

If he'd known she was remembering a human whose last night alive was spent cuddled against her to the sound of beautiful music, Tali would have been crying into her own arms.

* * *

A part of him wanted to stay with her as she lay curled asleep on her side on the pad, that odd black object still slung over her shoulder and drawn securely against her back, but his omni-tool had beeped at him, his project lead requesting his assistance back on the Alarei. Sighing quietly, he sent a message to Shala'Raan, asking if she could come watch over Tali, and he smiled softly when she replied quickly in the affirmative. She was as aware as he was that the human vessel she'd served on had gone down with her pilgrimage captain and many of the crew aboard, but she knew Rael didn't understand just how much Tali had come to love that ship and the friendships she'd made aboard. While Tali had exchanged extranet messages with her father once a week or so, she'd communicated with Raan almost every day in as much detail as she could without revealing classified information.

Shala read through those old messages on her omni-tool while the shuttle approached the Rayya, smiling while she read about their time at the beach on Bekenstein just a few days before the Normandy was destroyed. Tali's sadness about being unable to feel the water on her skin was obvious, but so was the joy when she moved on to write about how Shepard had shown her how to build a castle out of wet sand. Although in this case, Tali had carefully recreated the top half of the Rayya while her captain sat beside her and watched, talking to her the whole time about her childhood aboard it.

When the shuttle docked with the Rayya, Shala shut down her omni-tool and stepped out, making her way quickly through the maze of corridors. The liveship was practically a second home for her after all the time she'd spent aboard with Tali and her mother earlier in their lives, and she knew it almost as well as she did the Tonbay. Reaching the lavender and white tapestry that covered the entrance to Tali's quarters, she lifted a hand to tap on the metal frame but paused when she heard quiet music coming from inside. It was nothing she had ever heard before, though it sounded similar to a quarian instrument. She couldn't help but listen to it for a moment, smiling softly at the beautiful notes, but it stopped abruptly and a moment later she heard a man's voice. _"Wait, what? You're wearing a helmet?"_

Shala heard Tali call the man a _bosh'tet_ and laugh, but the sound stopped and she heard Tali sobbing. Brushing the tapestry aside, Shala stepped in and saw Tali sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall, her head drooped low while she shook with her sobs and hugged her knees tightly. The sight broke the admiral's heart, and she hurried over to slip to a seat beside her, sliding an arm around her shoulders while Tali turned to bury her visor against her aunt's shoulder, shaking even harder. Shala could only close her eyes to hold back her own tears and hold her grieving niece tightly.

"I should have known father wouldn't be here when I woke up," Tali murmured quietly, her voice resentful and slightly hoarse from her crying.

"He's been very busy on the Alarei, but he asked me to come look after you," Raan rubbed Tali's shoulder gently, always having played the mediator between them like Rael's wife had before her death. "He's been worried about you, though. When we heard about the Citadel attack and that your mission was over, he was excited to see you again."

"I... I know he cares. I just... nevermind." Tali shook her head. She'd hoped her father would take some leave time and be there for her, but Shala was here, and she knew she'd _make_ time. "I just don't want to be alone right now."

The young woman's voice, usually so happy and excited, sounded lifeless, and Shala pulled her in gently for another embrace, laying her head against Tali's helmet. "I'm here, Tali." She wasn't sure if the younger woman wanted to talk about whatever had happened and didn't want to push, but she knew talking always seemed to calm her. "What was that music you were listening to before I came in? It was lovely."

Tali tensed, but after a moment slipped out of the embrace to lift her wrist and pull up the recording on her omni-tool leaving it paused on the image of Shepard and his violin. "Shepard...the captain.. he played it the night before..." Tali sniffled and started the recording where he was putting the bow to the strings, closing her eyes to listen to it. She rested her wrist on her knee to keep the image stable and laid her head on Shala's shoulder, listening while her aunt stroked her shoulder and watched.

"Nothing I read about him said he was a musician," Shala spoke quietly, trying to keep Tali engaged while they listened. "I don't think many people would expect that from a soldier who takes on such dangerous missions."

"I had no idea, either, Tali murmured. "He only played when no one was down in the hangar or engineering."

Shala wondered how Tali ended up with a recording if he was that private about it, but she decided not to pry. She'd expected Tali to start crying again, but there was only silence between them while they listened and watched, until he finished and opened his eyes with a contented smile, setting the instrument on his lap before he stretched his shoulders and gazed around. He blinked and peered down after catching something with his eye. Tali chuckled softly, knowing what was coming next, and the image swiveled to capture the speaker.

Shala smiled when she saw Tali in the image, wringing her hands in her customary nervous gesture, and they kept watching until he'd pulled her up to sit beside him and lifted the bow again. Tali paused the image before it showed her leaning in against him and bowed her head while her aunt chided her gently and playfully. "You eavesdropped on the captain but he let you stay for another performance? Humans have unusual punishments."

Tali stared at the image of herself and Shepard sitting there, smiling faintly. "He was an unusual man... he was unique." She wanted to tell her more, but... he'd been a human, and her captain, and... and this was Aunt Shala, not her father. Sighing quietly, she resumed the playback and bowed her head, quietly waiting for the disapproving lecture on snuggling up against a human captain, but after a few moments, she felt Shala's hand stroking her shoulder again gently while the music continued.

"And you cared for him?" Tali sniffled and nodded her head fractionally. Shala sighed quietly and wrapped her arm around her niece to pull her in for a hug, and Tali embraced her tightly. "I'm sorry. He sounds like he was an amazing man."

Tali nodded and sniffled quietly. She'd cried out most of the grief in her now, though she knew tomorrow would bring it back. "He was. He lost his father and sister in a pirate attack when he was young - a few years before Pilgrimage, if he was quarian - and he survived some horrible things, but I never understood why he could smile about all these little things, and in all these intense fights." She turned toward the recording where he was still playing, and she was reclined contentedly against him, and she finally managed a small smile. "I asked him about it, there on the Mako – the vehicle we're sitting on – when he finished, and he told me all about it." Sighing softly, she sat up and leaned against her aunt's shoulder. "You were right...he was unique."

Shala smiled and took Tali's hand in hers, squeezing it warmly. "Tell me more about him."

* * *

"..and while Liara and I were dodging these acid spits the rachni shot at us, Shepard and Wrex were up ahead blasting them apart with their shotguns, and keelah, they were both _laughing_." Tali giggled and took another sip of her drink while Shala stared at her from her spot on Rael's sleeping pad a few feet away.

"Laughing? While they were fighting _rachni?_ Keelah, you make them sound crazy." Still, Shala chuckled while Tali shook her head.

"Wrex was, well, a krogan. You know how they are. But that was something about him I never understood. Shepard seemed to relate to everyone else so easily, like he'd turn into a krogan while he was fighting alongside Wrex, or get sarcastic around Garrus. I think it was his way of putting people at ease.. or maybe he really was part krogan, turian, asari, and quarian." She smiled softly at the memory of her teasing on the beach. "But no, he wasn't crazy. There was a woman on the Citadel who'd been kidnapped by the slavers who'd wiped out the colony he grew up on, and C-Sec asked him if he would help talk her out of suicide. He was so gentle with her, even talked her into taking a sedative and carried her in his arms back to the officers so they could take her to the hospital." She shook her head slowly. "That must have been a painful reminder, but he didn't let that stop him."

"A brave warrior and a sweetheart musician both? No wonder you fell for him." Shala regretted the words as soon as she'd said them, watching Tali's head suddenly droop, but the young woman sniffled and chuckled a moment later.

"He could be a bit scary, though.. not toward us, I mean, but sometimes he'd get a look in his eye that made you shudder. Like when Liara and I were fighting through the Citadel, barely keeping up with him while Sovereign – the huge ship – was trying to take control of it. He just tore through _everything_, and we barely had any kills to our names. He did the same thing the last time we were right on Saren's trail, on Virmire."

Shala was becoming more and more surprised while she listened to Tali's stories. While her frequent messages told them some details about her missions, she hadn't known that Tali had been involved in such heavy combat. She let her motherly concern out, though, with a slight frown. "I can't believe he dragged you along into such terrible fighting."

Tali's head snapped up and she gave her aunt a fierce glare. "He didn't 'drag' me anywhere. I was part of his team, and I knew what I was getting myself into when I offered to join his crew. I didn't join up just to hunt for salvaged tech or geth parts, Shala." She pulled an OSD out of her arm pocket, holding it up while Shala stared at her adopted niece with a stunned expression. "This has hundreds of terabytes of data about the geth on it, and I was right by his side when we wiped out the last of their outposts and found it. I didn't finish my pilgrimage just by following him from a safe spot in his shadow! We wiped out hundreds of geth, a dozen squads of mercenaries, a horde of rachni, a platoon of crazed krogan, and we did it _together_."

Shala could only nod before Tali continued. "Besides," Tali continued quietly, slipping the OSD back into her pocket. "We all looked out for each other. Wrex stepped in front of a swarm of rachni to shield us when they first appeared, and Garrus did the same for me when my shields were down from a geth sniper. And Shepard did the same kind of thing for all of us constantly. Every time one of us was injured, he treated our wounds himself, taking our minds off the pain with jokes or teasing, while he ignored his own."

_She was wounded, too? _Shala had noticed a few patches on her suit, but had never really imagined they were from gunfire or the talons of rachni or anything else they'd run across. "I'm sorry, Tali... you know how old mothers get when we think about our families." It was all she could think to say. She'd never seen Tali so fiercely passionate or protective, and the realization struck her like a charging krogan. _She loved him._

* * *

Anderson, Joker, Ashley, and Garrus sat around a desk in the councilor's presidium office, two empty bottles already on the table in front of them while they sipped fresh drinks. Despite the drinks, the mood hadn't been positive, and they all stared in silence at the table for a long moment before Anderson broke the silence, turning toward Ashley. "Are you all packed and ready to go?"

Ash nodded, but stared down at her drink for a moment before she sighed. "Yeah... I don't know, sir. I don't know if my heart's in it, though. I mean, I've always just been a grunt. You point out a target, and I shoot it. I'm not sure why Shepard thought I'd make a good officer, or why I was even accepted... especially with my history."

Garrus snorted and answered the question before Anderson could open his mouth. "Come on, Williams. We were all there on Virmire. You coordinated those salarian teams like a pro."

"He's right, Chief. I read the reports, including one Captain Kirrahe forwarded. He was even more glowing in his praise than Shepard was, and he was almost as experienced." Anderson gave her a warm smile despite the sadness in his eyes. "Have a little faith in yourself, and if you can't do that, then have faith in Shepard, Kirrahe, and Garrus."

Ash managed a small smile while Garrus laid a hand on her shoulder. "Come on, Williams. If a turian thinks you'd do a good job ordering people around, you know it's high praise."

Laughter finally rang out in the office while they shared smiles, and Ash tapped her glass to Garrus'. "All right, I'll go. But what about you two?" She looked to Garrus and Joker, who both shrugged.

"I've been assigned to ground duty." Joker practically spat the words. "Flight instructor, back on Earth. I don't know, though.. I mean, I guess I don't really have a choice. Orders are orders. It was either that, or a billet on a dreadnought, but that'd be like flying a garbage scow from one planet to another: as boring as listening to politicians talk." He glanced over at a smirking Anderson. "Uh, no offense, sir."

The councilor chuckled and waved a hand. "Believe me, Joker, I have a hard time staying awake.. or rolling my eyes when Sparatus is talking."

"Stupid son of a bitch," Garrus snorted. "Sometimes I wish Shepard had held your fleet back like Liara suggested."

No one said anything, but the general sentiment was apparently shared. "What about you, Garrus? Returning to C-Sec?" Anderson tried to keep the conversation going while the turian shook his head.

"Not a chance. I'd end up thrown out inside a week. I'm going to reapply for Spectre training. Maybe being the only turian who was right about that traitorous bastard will be good for something." His mandibles twitched in what Ashley thought was a smirk.

Anderson nodded his head. "I think you'd make a good one, and I imagine Shepard would agree. His reports always spoke highly of you. Hell, of everyone on that ship, Wrex included."

Ashley and Joker nodded their agreement while Garrus looked out at the lake far below, where the monument to the krogan stood down there somewhere. "I hope you're right." He shook his head, remembering the pitiful excuse for a memorial service they'd come from attending where Shepard's deeds had been understated. The memory filled him with anger, and he scowled. "They ought to be putting a statue of Shepard up right in front of the elevator to the council chambers, that yells 'I told you!' every five minutes."

Joker chuckled. "Screw that. Put the statue up in the petitioner's spot, right in front of them."

"Damn right, Joker," Ash replied, staring out at the presidium.

* * *

_Ground duty just got a lot more interesting. _Jeff Moreau exited the Cord-Hislop building with a chuckle and a smile on his face. Being a flight instructor hadn't been as horrible as he'd been expecting, but with the Alliance clearly having little interest in assigning a pilot with brittle bones – and one who had loudly defended Shepard and the truth of the attack – he'd started opening the messages from various aerospace companies that were interested in his talents. Most were less than exciting, but Cord-Hislop's hadn't promised great pay, amazing medical benefits, or any of the usual corporate jargon. But it was _interesting._

Below the typical greetings in all those emails, the Director of R&D had gotten straight to the point with a picture that made his eyes fly wide: the Normandy, in a longer, beefier form, with scale references and a few specifications that immediately made him want to leap into the cockpit. The only words other than the greeting were _"If you'd like to know more, please visit the Cord-Hislop corporate office in Knoxville at your convenience. No appointment is necessary."_

He'd been on a shuttle an hour later. He'd been ushered straight to the director's office, who led him down to a sub-basement where a field of engineering tech and a heavily shielded and guarded room was waiting, and inside waited a flight simulator that closely matched that of the original Normandy.

_"We've been commissioned by the Alliance to created an updated prototype of the __Normandy, but as you saw, this one is twice as big and three times as powerful. You're the only one familiar enough with the flight characteristics to do this job, Mister Moreau, and to be frank, the only one who _can _do it. Most of the design is done, but if there's anything that needs changing, anything that you think needs updating, you let the team know, and it's done."_

The man had only sealed the deal when he implied that the Alliance Navy would respond favorably to Cord-Hislop's recommendation that Joker be the one to pilot her during trials, shakedown, and her first cruise. His only reply to the doubt on the pilot's lips was a sly, knowing smile and an inference that the military-industrial complex still held great sway over the decisions of men and women with gold stripes on their shoulders. Joker had accepted on the spot and sent in his request to Anderson that he be transferred to the inactive reserves. The very next day, he was in the simulator, a wide grin on his face.

The news today had been even better: she was already undergoing construction, and he'd be traveling to the classified drydock to take a look at her for himself.

_Baby, you and I are going to have some great times together._ For once, his steps had a noticeable spring in them while he headed for the transport terminal, not even feeling the quiet ache in his legs.

* * *

Urdnot Wrex growled quietly upon his stone throne, shaking his head as the latest emissary rumbled off and another walked up. He'd had to fight a half dozen challengers to his claim of leadership over the clan, but now that he was here, he wondered if he'd made a mistake. He was the strongest, and everyone on Tuchanka knew it, but that knowledge tended to make life bloodless. For months, he'd just spent his days speaking with various ambassadors, trying to avoid boredom. He'd become a master of listening without really paying attention.

"Clan leader?"

The emissary's voice broke his stare at the empty varren pit, and he turned to the new arrival, who looked as bored to be here as he was. So had the last one. Wrex could feel the excitement over his ideas and proposals waning lately, even his own, and he restrained his growl while he wondered what Shepard would do. The man had epitomized patience and tolerance, especially when dealing with the Council, though he could see the man's urges to headbutt something when he walked out of the meetings. A slow, vicious smile spread across Wrex's lips when he had a flash of insight. He knew what Shepard would do.

Wrex stood and clapped the emissary on the shoulder, grabbing his shotgun from beside the throne. "Come, Jorgal Brotog. Words can wait. Let's gather the others for a hunt, and we'll speak while we feast on thresher steak!"

He'd spoken loud enough for the entire encampment to hear, and they all roared their approval.

_Crafty, Wrex._ He could almost hear Shepard's words, and he grinned to himself while the clan gathered and moved toward the tomkahs.


	4. Or does it?

_Author's Note:_

_Chapter 5 is done, which ends the day before Shepard awakens, and I'm working on 6. As expected, it's getting easier and faster when characters start interacting with each other. I usually give myself a day to sleep on a newly written chapter and then re-read and proofread it, though. Fortunately, I'm on vacation this week.  
_

_Enjoy! (Or Wrex will eat you.)  
_

* * *

Garrus Vakarian felt no satisfaction, despite the cheers that roared to life all around him. With his final shot, he'd broken the course record on the long rifle range, but it hadn't really been a challenge, not like some others he'd taken. Shots that had earned him a thankful grin and a clap on the shoulder, gestures that meant far more to him than the approval of a bunch of... kids.

_His heart was pounding in his chest, but he ignored it, waiting for that moment just between its beats before he pulled the trigger. His rifle barked and recoiled against his shoulder, and the head of the krogan that had Kaidan around the neck and lifted into the air suddenly exploded in a fountain of blood. The marine lieutenant coughed when he dropped to his knees, turning toward Garrus' position over two hundred yards away, a thankful grin spreading on his lips while he tried to catch his breath._

"_Nice shot, Garrus," Shepard's voice came over the comm. He'd been busy fending off a krogan of his own, helpless to assist his friend._

"_Sorry about the wait, but you kept flailing around in the way like a drunken asari dancer trying to impress a hanar." Garrus' wry joke made both men laugh, though Kaidan was quick to break into another fit of coughing. Still, he managed to wheeze out the words that made the turian grin._

"_You'd be the expert on dancing with hanar, Garrus."_

Sighing, the turian marksman rose off his stomach and secured his rifle on his back, walking off the firing line toward the room that waited to test his class on the finer points of galactic communications systems and the mass relay network. He'd been in training for months, and while he'd picked up a few skills, he'd picked up far more in the same amount of time aboard the Normandy. Not to mention they'd come at a much faster and exciting pace than this boring, plodding, structured-

"Vakarian! You know the rule! Weapons have to be returned to the armorer!" The turian instructor's voice was annoyed: this was the third time Garrus had been reminded, and each time he scowled to see the derision that made the trainee's mandibles twitch.

_Spirits, they're training me to possibly become a shadow agent of the council with almost unlimited power and authority, and they don't trust us to keep our damned weapons attached to our backs? What am I _doing _here?_

Whirling around, Garrus growled and yanked the collapsed rifle from his back and tossed it to the instructor before he stormed away from the classroom.

"Vakarian, where do you think you're going?" the instructor called after him, but Garrus had only two words for him, called in irritation over his shoulder.

"I quit."

* * *

Second Lieutenant Ashley Williams collapsed onto her bunk with a low groan while a dozen other officers did the same, none of them even bothering to remove their mud-coated armor.

"Christ, finally!" a groaning voice exclaimed from across the practically empty barracks.

"You can say that again," Ash chuckled, slowly rolling her neck. Despite having had only two hours of sleep in the last seventy-two, most of them seemed content to simply enjoy the simple pleasure of laying on their backs on something soft, instead of leaning up against a tree or rock with their rifles close at hand.

"What, even you, Williams? I thought ICT would be a walk in the park for you after all the shit you saw on the Normandy." The weary female voice was chuckling, though, and Ash could only will a slight smirk while she rolled her head toward the grinning, muddy lieutenant across from her.

"There's a difference between killing a company of geth and crazed krogan, and going _three days _without any damn sleep."

"All I know is that if Shepard was top of his class all the way through the program, he must have been made of titanium," a male voice groaned across the way. "I certainly am _not_."

Ash chuckled and lifted her head to gaze over at the man. "Don't sell yourself short, Mbantua. My money's on you. I still don't know how the hell you managed to pick up Keaton's sorry ass and carry her up that last slope."

"It's not something you can teach," the man replied with a laugh, melting back onto his bed, right before the barracks doors flew open and a trio of metal cylinders bounced down the polished barracks floor.

"Flashbangs!" Ash yelled, squeezing her eyes tight and ramming her palms tightly against her ears a split second before a deafening boom and blinding flash seemed to signal the end of the world.

But as soon as they went off, all the officers were rolling off their beds and falling into cover.

_A fucking training drill, _now_? Shepard, I don't know how you survived this, but if you and Kaidan are looking down at me, I could use a hand, or a kick in the ass._

* * *

Liara T'Soni stared out the window of her apartment, but the view was obscured by moisture. Silently, she wiped her eyes again, but the moisture remained. It had begun to rain while she'd been staring out at Nos Astra's skyline, absorbed in her thoughts and memories, and the water trickled down the glass. She'd chosen this apartment and furnished it to remind her of her childhood home, back on Thessia. Even the elegant silk nightgown she wore was comfortable and reminded her of the ones she and her mother enjoyed relaxing in while they sat beside each other, engrossed in their reading and sips of wine. But as she sat there, her arms wrapped around her knees, she didn't feel comforted, and this time, like so many others in the last year, she'd had no one to turn to. Unlike that one night.

_Though she'd grown stronger in her biotics and more confident in the dangers they frequently found themselves in, she couldn't help but feel even more apprehensive as she walked across the empty mess hall, staring down at the deck beneath her feet. Her heart suddenly jolted in her chest when she collided with something, and she stammered out an apology when she looked up to see Tali a foot away, staring at her, fingers entwined at her waist in that nervous gesture everyone on the crew was now familiar with._

"_Oh, Tali, I'm so sorry! I didn't see you!" _

"_N-no, it's my fault! I wasn't watching where I was going, and..."_

_They were both suddenly aware that they'd bumped into each other only a couple of meters from Shepard's cabin door, and it was obvious they'd both had the same destination. While Tali's fidgeting continued, Liara felt her cheeks grow hot as they just stood there awkwardly for a moment, until they heard footsteps behind them and they quickly turned, eager for the distraction. Shepard was standing there, an amused smile on his lips._

"_While I usually wouldn't complain about finding two charming ladies at my door, shouldn't you two be sleeping? We'll be hitting the Mu relay in eight hours."_

"_I couldn't sleep," Liara blurted, and Tali's head nodded quickly in agreement._

_Shepard chuckled and moved around them, touching the button to open the doors while he waved a hand over his shoulder for them to follow him in. "So you both decided to wake up the captain and deprive him of sleep as well?" He slid a datapad onto the desk just inside the __door and turned to see them both still standing there awkwardly at the door. Sighing, he snapped his fingers and pointed at the chairs at the small round table in the middle of the cabin, turning again to walk over to the desk by his bed, pulling open a drawer while Liara and Tali hesitantly stepped inside and took a seat at the table._

_Liara spoke first while Shepard rummaged through the drawer. "But.. you're not asleep." She felt like an idiot as soon as she said the words, and she was pretty sure Tali was smirking at her beneath her visor._

_Laughing, Shepard walked over with three bottles of water. He kept a couple bottles of liquor in his cabin, but even Wrex probably wouldn't be drinking right now. "True, but how did you know that?" The two women exchanged small, embarrassed smiles while Shepard sat and slid a bottle to each of them, smirking. "Yeah, that's what I thought. All right, Liara, you're up first. What's on your mind?"_

Liara smiled with unfocused eyes, remembering how he'd listened to their worries and took their minds off them by asking about Thessia. She didn't know what she'd been looking for when she walked to Shepard's door, or what Tali had been looking for, but he got them both trading stories about their homes and sharing laughs until they were relaxed enough for their eyelids to start drooping. Tali had succumbed first, and he and Liara had eased her over to the bed, where she curled up with only the quietest hint of sleepy protest.

Laughing softly at the memory of Tali's mortification at having awoken on the captain's bed, she sipped her wine and smiled. She'd woken up on it, too, with no small amount of blushing herself though she'd thankfully been curled on the opposite side from Tali. Shepard appeared perfectly content in his own slumber, reclined in a chair with his legs propped up on the desk. Garrus and Wrex had teased them about it mercilessly while they geared up, and all the while, Shepard had been laughing to himself, and Liara and Tali both shared a smirk, wondering if Shepard had let it slip on purpose.

_I wouldn't put it past him_. Liara laughed softly. After enduring their teasing, she and Tali had grown closer and developed a real friendship instead of a subtle, unspoken rivalry. Twisting on the couch, she gazed over at her small office area, sighing quietly. She'd messaged Tali that morning, but no response had come in yet. She'd given up on Garrus. His last real message had mentioned checking out Omega for something to do, but he hadn't responded in the month since with anything but _"Okay here. Busy. Will write later."_

Standing, she padded over to the terminal and checked it anyways, but sighed again at the empty inbox.

* * *

Hannah Shepard stepped into the darkness of her cabin and sighed when the doors slid shut behind her. She knew she should have taken a week's leave when she'd had the opportunity at spacedock, but she'd tried to justify her decision by saying the upgrades were too important. Her fingers began unfastening the buttons of her uniform tunic while she sighed and walked toward her clothes locker, shaking her head. _It's not like time off would do anything but give me time to think, anyway. _Pulling off the navy blue top, she slipped it onto a hangar before she turned to stare over at the nightstand beside her bed and the picture atop it. Sometimes she wondered if it was a mistake to keep a constant reminder of what she'd lost in the quiet cabin that always allowed her more time to thank than she wanted, but she couldn't bear to put it away. Moving to the bed, she dropped heavily to a seat and stared at the image until her eyes drifted shut and the memory returned.

"_Just put the damn thing down and come on." Her son smiled impishly at her while she gazed up from her datapad with the appropriate look of motherly shock at his language. Despite it, though, she wanted to laugh, knowing exactly where he'd gotten such a demanding, unapologetic tone._

_Instead, she smirked and folded her arms across her chest. "Every swear out of your mouth is another minute I'll just sit here staring at you instead of following."_

_Her son just grinned and shrugged his shoulders. "Your leave ends tomorrow, but the rest of us have all the time in the world. So hurry up, damn it!"_

_That time, she couldn't help but laugh, shaking her head while she stood, giving him the same irreverent grin he was flashing at her. "If I hear that you talk like this in front of Lisa's parents, I'm trading your cello for a tuba."_

"_Not a chance. You'd get bored playing by yourself." She could scarcely believe she was gazing **up** at her son's smirking face and mirthful blue eyes, and she could only smile while he took her hand and led her out of the dining room toward the front door. "Besides, I'm always a gentleman around them. Dad told me if you make sure the parents like you, you'll be able to get away with anything. Well, almost anything."_

_Hannah could only shake her head hopelessly and stifle her laugh while they stepped outside and he led her toward the side of the house through the pure white snow, knowing her husband was exactly right: like mother, like son, in this family. "Uh huh. As if there's anything you'd be 'getting away with'. She's too smart for you, young man."_

"_I don't know what you're talking about," he muttered while his free hand reached up and rubbed the back of his neck, ignoring her wide grin._

"_I'm sure you don't... what the hell?" She broke out laughing at the sight in front of her. Her grinning husband and daughter stood on either side of a snowman... a very interesting snowman. The snow of its head was dyed auburn as if to imitate hair, they'd drawn grinning pink lips on it, and its twig arms were positioned as if to clasp its hands behind its back. But what was most interesting about it was the navy blue dress jacket they'd adorned it with, the shoulders sporting two thick black bars on either side of a thin one._

_Her son slipped his hand from hers and moved to stand beside his sister, clearing his throat and pulling a pad from inside his jacket. "Attention to orders!" They all snapped to attention while a wide smile spread across Hannah's lips and she imitated the same posture of the snowman, clasping her hands behind her back while her son continued. "On behalf of Rear Admiral Dominic Leclair... whoever that is... it is my pleasure to inform Lieutenant Hannah Shepard, Systems Alliance Navy, that you are hereby promoted to Lieutenant Commander, and appointed all the privileges and responsibilities due your rank." She saw her son's lips twitch before he added: "..And may God have mercy on your soul."_

_They all shared a laugh while she slowly shook her head and her son moved to pull the uniform jacket from the snowman, but she held up her hand and grinned. "Wait, I need a picture of this." While her daughter slid an arm around the snowman, her husband rested his hands proudly on its 'shoulders' , and his son did the same to his sister, she lifted her omni-tool and returned their smiles, taking the photo._

Wiping her tears from her cheek, she sniffled and touched the picture frame, watching it change into an image she'd been far prouder of than her own promotion. Her son stood before the Citadel Council, hands clasped behind his back, the faintest of smiles on his lips while they named him a Spectre. He had his father's strong build, firm jaw, and black hair, but his blue eyes were hers through and through, with that gleam she thought for years that she'd never see again. And now, she knew with certainty, she never would again. Closing her eyes, she could feel the tears coming unabated, but only the beep of her omni-tool kept them from falling, and she exhaled a shuddering breath, opening her message inbox and blinking at the name she saw listed as the most recent sender: Tali'Zorah vas Neema.

Five minutes later, she was weeping silently, but the music that kept the silence of her lonely cabin at bay left a smile on her lips.

* * *

Tali finally pressed the button to send the message and its attached video file after editing out everything but Shepard. Sighing, she stared out the cockpit window of the shuttle, watching Alchera rotate slowly beneath her while she wondered if she'd made a mistake and reopened an old wound. Beside her, Kal'Reegar sat in silence, busying himself with scans of the other planets and various asteroids so she could sit and reflect undisturbed. While it was obvious, unspoken knowledge that she wanted the shuttle so she could visit the resting place of her old crew and captain, the softness in her voice and Kal'Reegar's recommendation that they could also survey for valuable resources had convinced the Neema's captain to lend them the shuttle while the fleet mined an asteroid field in the Arinlarkan system nearby.

Over the past six months that she'd been assigned to his team, he'd heard the sadness in her voice whenever she mentioned the Normandy and its captain, even if her stories about them had lifted her mood as long as it took to tell them. As soon as they were over, however, quiet once again became her default.

"Thanks for doing this for me, Kal." Tali's soft voice broke the silence while she stared out the window at the barren, frozen planet below.

"No need, ma'am. I understand. And it's not like we won't be doing some surveying whenever you're ready to depart." Tali smiled softly beneath her visor. Since joining his team, she'd learned that 'modesty' and 'generosity' were two words that could easily be used as synonyms for 'Kal'Reegar'.

"Just... give me a few minutes, and-"

"Tali, I know what he meant to you. Take all the time you need." His voice was gentle, and despite the surprising use of her first name and the fact he'd said 'he' instead of 'it' or 'them', she only nodded silently and closed her eyes, allowing the tears to flow while she laid her visor against the glass.

* * *

"Sounds like you've already made up your mind." Jacob Taylor refilled the empty wine glass with the merlot Miranda had chosen and took a seat on the couch beside her while she nodded her thanks and took a sip, shrugging her shoulders.

"At this point, I think we've run out of options. Simple organic reconstruction is just taking too long." Sighing, she closed her eyes and rubbed her temple, shaking her head. "And to make matters worse, he's refused to allow me to implant a control chip."

Jacob didn't have to ask who 'he' was while he took a sip of ale, turning to gaze at the monitor where the image showed a mangled body lying still, a dozen tubes slowly circulating fluids through its veins. He couldn't restrain the light shudder that the sight always gave him and shook his head, turning back toward Miranda. "Yeah, I can see the dilemma. Bringing him back exactly as he was means bringing back a man who lost his platoon to a Cerberus project." Miranda's face twitched at the way Jacob said the name of their organization, but she tried her best to ignore it while he continued. "Not to mention the way he annihilated a few operations and killed dozens of employees." Shaking his head, he chuckled at the irony of it all. "Which is exactly what he did best: annihilated everything in his way. When you finally wake him up, I don't want to be anywhere near him."

Miranda's eyes flashed with irritation when she opened them and met his gaze. "If the Illusive Man says he'll work with us, then he will. He didn't get to his position by making mistakes."

Jacob had seen that look before, but there wasn't a trace of concern on his face while he leaned back and shrugged his shoulders. "You say so. But like I said, sounds like you've made up your mind, so you might as well make it official and get to work." Miranda stared over at the monitor for a moment before she set her glass on the table and nodded, standing. Before she could turn, Jacob's hand slid into hers and he chuckled. "I didn't mean right now. Even you need to relax, Miss Lawson."

Miranda paused for a few seconds and shook her head, slipping her hand from his. The fact that she'd been considering sitting back down struck her as evidence enough that she'd gotten too close to her lieutenant. "I can't. I need to get Wilson off his lazy ass so he can get to work."

Before he could reply, she'd already started walking, moving briskly out the door.

While it shut behind her, he sighed and shook his head. He'd had a feeling that she'd see last night as a mistake. Taking a sip of his drink, he turned back toward the monitor where the body lay somewhere between life and death and muttered quietly. "Hope you don't have nightmares, Commander, because you're gonna be sleeping for a while."


	5. Dreams and nightmares

Liara jolted awake, surprised to find herself in bed and under covers. She couldn't count how many times she'd fallen asleep at her desk or on the couch in the past year and a half since moving to Illium. Rubbing her eyes, she yawned and looked around, wondering what had woken her, especially after such a pleasant dream, which was another rarity. She began laughing quietly in recollection of it but jumped slightly when her omni-tool beeped again and she smiled. It only gave that beep when a friend was calling. Sitting up against a pillow and her headboard, she opened the interface and her smile widened while she activated the call. Tali's face – well, visor – sprang to life and she could swear the glimmering eyes brightened beneath the purple glass.

"_Hi, Liara... did I wake you?"_

"Yes, and from a good dream, no less. But I forgive you."

"_It's been a while since I had one of those. Want to share?"_ Tali's eyes seemed to light up a bit, and Liara gazed down at her lap and chuckled.

"It was silly, but... I was just dreaming about a day when I was a girl. My mother took me to a concert in a park by our home. We sat on the grass and shared some fruit while we listened, but..." Tali could swear Liara just _giggled_ and felt a grin on her lips beneath her visor. "...but when I looked over, one of the people playing the harp – a large stringed instrument - was _Garrus_, and he was suddenly breaking strings with his talons and swearing while Wrex..." Liara suddenly paused and made another quiet sound.

_ That was definitely a giggle._ Tali found herself making the same sound, while Liara only laughed harder. _"Come on, Liara! What about Wrex?" _Tali bounced lightly on her toes, wanting to hear the rest, but it was too late. Liara was nearly doubled over with her laughter, leaving only her blue scalp crests visible in front of the video feed. Tali smirked and folded her arms, waiting for the asari to finish. After a minute, Liara finally inhaled a breath and let out one last giggle.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Wrex-" Another giggle. "Wrex was the conductor, but he was wearing one of those silly suits that human conductors wear, and-"

_"Hold on." _ Tali tapped furiously on her omni-tool and pulled up a visual of a human conductor, and she couldn't help but laugh at the thought of the huge krogan wearing such a suit and clasping such a tiny little stick in his fingers. _"Oh, keelah, that _is _funny. Okay, go on."_

Liara grinned and shook her head. "And he suddenly stopped waving his arms around and started yelling at Garrus. 'Damn it, turian, if you keep screwing up my performance, I'm going to eat you!' " Tali broke out laughing at the image, and at the deep, gravelly note Liara put into her voice in an attempt to mimic the surly krogan, but she grinned and watched while her friend continued. "So Garrus gets up and starts storming toward Wrex, but Kaidan jumped in between them and tried to hold them apart..."

An hour later, Tali curled up on her sleeping mat with a smile. Though Liara hadn't heard from Garrus either, she still giggled quietly to herself as she began drifting off, thinking of Wrex gulping Kaidan and then Garrus down like a snack.

* * *

"That's right, you bastards, just a little closer..." Garrus was murmuring quietly to himself behind his scope, seated back from the open window in the darkened room while his demolitions expert knelt in the corner, idly flicking the safety cap of his detonator switch open and shut. As soon as Garrus fired and took the batarian in one of his eyes, hidden explosives blew the squad of Blue Suns mercenaries apart. Their backup, fifty yards behind, suddenly dove into cover, but on the rooftop two hundred yards forward of Garrus' position, the rest of the squad leaped up and leaned down to open fire with their rifles, shredding through the mercs' shields and armor before they could even return fire.

Five minutes later, he felt a clap on his shoulder while they took their pick from the mercs' weapons and mods. This time, the congratulations made him grin wickedly. As they all filed into their cars, Garrus turned to his de facto XO and gazed down at a building diagram the turian had pulled up on his omni-tool.

"Okay, what's next?" Garrus asked Sidonis, that eager grin not leaving his face. _Finally, things are starting to look up._

* * *

"No, no! Harder! What are you, salarians?" Wrex bellowed while two of his younger warriors slammed their plates together with renewed vigor, and struggled with each other's bulging arms. Hungry varren awaited the loser in the pit below, though he'd pit any of his warriors against a few mutts.

"I expected to find warriors in your camp, not plateless humans." Wrex resisted the urge to scowl when he heard the voice of his brood brother, Urdnot Wreav. Before he'd returned, it was widely believed that Wreav would rise to lead the clan, and his brother, like a 'true' krogan, held a grudge. Naturally, he'd been responsible for circulating the fact that Wrex had followed a human shortly after his return, but Wrex had turned that into a great tale that earned him respect and not scorn.

Without bothering to turn, Wrex chuckled, the sound rumbling deep in his chest while one of the krogan slipped and fell into the pit to the sound of cheering roars and one angry one that made a varren yelp in pain. "I fought alongside a few humans whose pairs outweighed your quad, if you even have one. And one of them was a female." He finally turned after making that comment to see Wreav's eyes flashing in anger. Wrex watched him with a smirk on his face, but as expected, his brother only scowled, the fury leaving his eyes. _Figures. Damned coward._

"If you're just going to stand there looking stupid, make yourself useful and go find me some ryncol." As his brother stormed away with a growl, Wrex chuckled and turned to grin at his clan shaman, who was already returning the expression. "Guess I shouldn't expect that drink." The two krogan shared a loud laugh until the victorious roar of the loser echoed off the stone. They turned to watch the blood-covered krogan as he pulled himself out of the pit and raised his arms in victory. Yes, this warrior would be a fine addition to the clan. "Looks like they're ready for the Rite."

"Indeed. Blood and honor await them tomorrow," the shaman replied, walking over to give them the good news.

_And a lot of acid._ Wrex chuckled, remembering his own Rite. He'd changed many things since he took the throne, but not some things. Most had come to accept or even welcome his changes, encouraged by his balancing of violent krogan nature and the cooperation toward future glory. Still, every day was a challenge, and Wrex found himself grinning while he wondered what tomorrow would bring as two more warriors took position and knocked their plates together.

"Harder, or the only female camp you'll be visiting will belong to turians!" Wrex bellowed.

* * *

Liara sighed and leaned back in her office chair, slowly rubbing two pressure points at the base of her outer crests in an attempt to calm her nerves. She found that it didn't help as much as the physicians claimed, but lately very little was doing anything to help. Even soaking in the tub with a glass of wine and a book didn't leave her as relaxed as it once had. Though a smile crossed her face when she recalled she and Tali's latest talk, which had been about nothing but their daily lives... and a few amusing tidbits Liara had picked up about Wrex's activities on Tuchanka. Though Garrus was as uncommunicative as usual, his messages only a few words every month or so, they'd ceased worrying about him when he'd mentioned he'd made quite a few friends and they were doing some good work.

But with Wrex busy, Garrus up to goddess knew what, and Tali off on missions for the Admiralty, she was left with only the Shadow Broker to occupy her thoughts. Sighing, she turned to gaze out the window at Illium's setting sun, shaking her head slowly. She knew it was unhealthy, knew that replacing one obsession with another was making it harder to sleep and to find a measure of peace, but burying herself in simple historical study was no longer the exciting and enjoyable activity it once was. Without something to focus on, she knew, that same unsettled anxiety she felt after the destruction of the Normandy would return. Better to keep busy in an attempt to do some good than to return to that state of affairs.

When the sun slipped beneath the skyline, she closed her eyes in an attempt to rest for just an hour, but her terminal trilled softly behind her and she swiveled around with a sigh, opening up the newest message. The gasp she inhaled would have been loud to alarm Nyxeris, had she been present, when she saw the man that was lying asleep on a cold, sterile table, his strong features and black hair instantly familiar despite the faintly glowing scars that marred his cheek and jaw.

Only one line of text accompanied the video, and she had to blink back tears to read them.

_It won't be long now._

* * *

Sighing for the twentieth time since the shuttle ride began, Ashley squirmed in her seat and adjusted her leg where it was propped up on the opposite bench, trying to eliminate the slowly growing tension in her protesting limb. _Figures. One damn break of the femur and I end up doing public relations crap in the Terminus instead of jumping out of shuttles with a chute on my back or a jetpack strapped around my waist._

Anderson had promised to get her into the next course, but for the next couple of months, she could use some time ashore on a relaxing assignment beneath sunshine and clouds while she walked and hiked her leg back into peak performance. _As if some damn medi-gel and a week of physical therapy wouldn't do it._ But she had to smile, just a little, at the knowledge that he wanted her to have a vacation. Or at least, the closest to it that she'd be willing to accept.

"Thirty minutes to Horizon, Lieutenant Williams."

Ash sighed and rubbed her thigh, calling back up to the cockpit. "Thanks, LT." Turning back to her stubborn leg, she muttered to herself. "Thirty minutes to pure boredom. Can't wait."

* * *

"Damn it, Butler, just stay still! They'll run out of fodder before I run out of thermal clips!" Garrus' voice was a growl as he scoped the next Blood Pack vorcha to jump the barricade and fired, splitting its head open in a grotesque splash of blood that didn't faze the next vorcha to leap into danger.

"Just keep firing, Garrus! I'll take care of him." Melanis fired a grenade into the midst of the next few vorcha to leap over and quickly dropped the weapon to yank the straps of Butler's breastplate off and toss it aside. Garrus took a quick glance over at the wound and stifled the curse he wanted to mutter at the sight of the frothy pink blood that was bubbling up from the chest wound while Melanis worked quickly to apply medi-gel and an airtight wrap. Butler's gurgling gasps for breath made Garrus quiver with helpless rage while he shot a salarian member of Eclipse through an eye. His rifle fired over and over, until finally, the charge stopped, and he turned to meet Melanis' gaze.

The salarian just shook his head slowly and Garrus hung his head for a long moment, whispering to the spirits to protect his fallen friend and the three of them that were left. And for the chance to exact his vengeance upon the one responsible for this catastrophe.

* * *

Jeff Moreau had a habit of ignoring advice when it involved leaving the cockpit of the SR2. Still, he yawned while he adjusted the Z-axis trim of the inboard port thruster and tested it in the simulation that was running on his haptic displays. He'd been working 16 hour days over the past week, trying to distract himself from the fact that they'd soon be out of spacedock and flying off toward distant points of light at speeds the SR1 couldn't have even dreamed of. Shaking his head to clear the cobwebs, he grinned to himself and put the ship through a simulated roll that would've left his gut clenching if the ship had been moving in accordance to the inputs, but breathed a heavy sigh when his copilot spoke up.

_"That level of input is not recommended except in combat situations, Mr. Moreau."_

Joker shook his head and tried to block out the voice while he yanked the nose up into a sharp climb and adjusted the Y-axis controls.

_"Neither is that level recommended except in-"_

"You do realize we're running _simulations_, right? Of course you do," he grumbled. "Now shut up and let me do my job."

His copilot, for once, remained silent and Jeff rolled his eyes while he stared up at the overhead consoles, lips moving in a mockery of the most annoying sound he'd ever heard in his life.

* * *

"Are you sure you'll be all right without me, ma'am?"

Tali sighed as Kal'Reegar asked the question for the third time and stopped in her tracks, spinning around and pointing a finger at his visor, finding him already stopped with his hands clasped behind his back and a twinkle in his glimmering eyes. Smirking, Tali thumped his elbow with her tool kit and turned around to continue toward the shuttle. "_Bosh'tet._ Yes, I'm sure. Just because you pushed me out of the way of that falling debris on our last mission doesn't mean I'm not capable of taking care of myself, you know."

Kal grinned beneath his visor and fell into step beside her, shrugging. "Didn't mean to imply anything of the sort, ma'am. Just figured it couldn't hurt for you to hear yourself say you'll be fine a few times."

Tali shook her head and sighed, chuckling as they rounded the corner toward the docking bay. "I've studied under the great Kal'Reegar, of course I'm prepared to take charge of a bunch of misfits. That's what you do best, isn't it?" She shot him a sidelong smirk while he laughed quietly.

"Quite right, ma'am. Even the ones that were trained all backwards on a human ship while they were on Pilgrimage."

Tali's steps slowed subtly while her gaze slowly rotated toward a bulkhead, but she forced herself to shake the moment of melancholy off with a smile that felt a bit too forced. "I told you, if you keep poking fun at-"

"No no. I meant that I had to retrain you to do things the proper, screwed up way." His voice sounded so completely honest and factual that Tali laughed and hit him in the back of the knee with her tool kit, making him stumble for just a moment with a chuckle.

"Fine, apology accepted. Now, you overly polite _bosh'tet_, go clean your rifle or something. The adults have work to do." She stopped outside the hangar door and grinned at him while he drew himself upright and saluted.

"Aye aye, ma'am. Keep them out of trouble, now."

Tali rolled her eyes at his formality and bumped him with her toolkit again. "Oh, come on. It's just a milk run to some human colony to pick up shy young thing who probably broke his omni-tool."

Kal's head tilted subtly. " 'Milk run'? "

Tali chuckled quietly, remembering that she'd picked up too many human idioms on her Pilgrimage. "Human expression. It just means it'll be an easy delivery job."

Kal shifted slightly in a manner she'd learned meant he was uncomfortable, and her head tilted before he spoke. "Uh... why would humans be delivering milk?"

Tali paused for a moment before she broke out laughing while Kal just stared on in confusion. _What the hell did they _teach_ her on that ship? _After a long moment, she managed to catch her breath and grinned, shaking her head. "No, Kal, it's animal milk, not human milk. Apparently they used to drink a lot of it even as adults, and before they had reliable refrigeration, it was delivered fresh every day."

"Oh. Uh... okay. Don't really want to know how you picked _that_ up, but I'll just turn around and go clean a rifle or something." He gave her a grin while she chuckled and shook her head, tapping the panel to open the door.

"Don't get into any trouble while I'm gone, or I'll tell Aunt Shala to assign you to engineering duties." She waved and slipped out the door before he could reply, and as he watched it slide shut behind her, he noticed the slight bounce in her step had already faded.

Sighing, he shook his head and turned to walk away. Two years, and she was still happiest when she was talking about her time aboard the Normandy, or listening to someone else's stories. Even Shala'Raan was still worried about her, but they thanked the ancestors that she at least had overcome the depression that had covered her like a shroud for well over a year.

"Human milk... keelah." Kal chuckled to himself, shaking his head while he headed back toward his quarters.

* * *

Miranda closed the message terminal and leaned back from the desk with a sigh, reaching up to rub the back of her neck and roll her head slowly. She still wasn't certain why the Illusive Man wanted T'Soni kept abreast of their progress, but it was true, so far the asari had been relatively cooperative with Cerberus when it came to sharing her data regarding the Shadow Broker. And that relationship could prove useful when Project Lazarus was fully successful.

Standing, she walked over to the table in the center of the medical bay, gazing down at the very heart of the project, monitoring the vitals that were continuously being displayed on monitors attached to the bed and throughout the station. Heart rate 46, blood pressure 105 over 69, oxygen saturation 99. Satisfied, she gazed up at the scarred face and the peaceful expression it wore, studying it for a long moment before she cracked a slight smile and nodded in satisfaction. Two years, and the greatest medical achievement in recorded history was essentially complete. Just a few more days, and two of the most expensive Cerberus projects ever undertaken would be complete and ready to resume the most important mission in human history.

Pulling over a stool, she sat and gazed down at the face while the eyelids began to twitch for the first time in two years. Gazing over at the EEG, Miranda studied the patterns and a smile formed on her lips. REM sleep? It was occurring earlier than Wilson's projections had estimated, but the quiet snort that escaped her lips indicated how little that surprised her. The man was an idiot in everything but his narrow field. She knew she should administer a sedative to return him to the deep sleep he'd been in for the last two weeks, but she found herself gazing down at the twitching muscles with a faint smile, the button for the sedative close at hand.

_What are you dreaming about, Commander?_

* * *

_Overhead, the birds chirped merrily while they chased each other through the skies. It had only been a few days since the last of the snows had melted, but his father always insisted on preparing a feast on the first clear day following winter, and it was an annual ritual they all enjoyed. Especially on the times when his mother was home on leave or between assignments, like now. Laughing, he dodged a backhanded swat aimed at his backside and jumped out the door while the grinning blue-skinned woman chased after him, her basket of bread tucked under an arm._

_ Suddenly, she was lifted up into the air and she squealed with laughter while the scarred, reptilian figure shot him a toothy grin and carried the pest over toward the table. "I'll keep her out of your hair, Shepard, as long as you promise me your old man didn't overcook that meat you promised."_

_ "Shepard, please tell me we poor dextros aren't going to starve." Behind Wrex, Garrus approached beside Ashley, and for the first time since he'd met him, the turian was without his armor, adorned instead in a simple blue suit that made him look out of place. The human woman plucked awkwardly at her yellow sun dress, a smirk upon her lips while he shrugged at his turian friend and smiled._

_ "I told you, my mother's taking care of that. So shut up and go sit down. I already saw a few bottles of... something, and there were a couple of dextro labels."_

_ Ash and Garrus shoved at each other in a sudden race for the table, brushing past Wrex and a squirming, laughing Liara. Turning toward the grill, he smiled, seeing his mother leaning against his father's side while they shared quiet words and a soft kiss while his sister braided the auburn locks that were usually tied up in a military bun. He moved to the wall of the house and folded his arms, leaning against it with a contented sigh, watching as everyone began assembling around the table. Even Kaidan was there, demonstrating something to Joker and Anderson with exaggerated movements of a breadstick that made them all laugh._

_ Something was missing, though. Turning, he swept his gaze around the tranquil surroundings, concern taking a gentle hold on his heart before he felt a soft hand on his shoulder. Turning back around, he stopped and couldn't help but smile as the concern faded, replaced by the warmth of two glimmering eyes beneath long locks of silver hair that spilled over bare purple shoulders. A three-fingered hand slipped into his and squeezed gently, leading him toward the table where everyone was already sitting, waiting for them._

_ He pulled out the chair for his companion, who gave him a curious tilt of her head before she realized his intentions, and she gave him a beaming smile while she sat and he slid the chair under her. His father gave him a wink, his mother a smirk, and his sister giggled while the krogan grinned with a toothy maw. _

_ Wrex opened his mouth to say something, but suddenly the soft chirping of the birds was replaced by an ear-splitting mechanical roar, and they all shrieked and covered their ears in pain until the sound faded. The soft blue sky had shifted into a sickening orange haze, and they all gazed up in shock as dozens of midnight blue shapes began descending toward them, impossibly large, their sickening appendages spreading while an electric red glow began to burn between them, causing his sister to shriek in terror._

Just as quickly as it had appeared, the orange haze was replaced by white and the blurry image of two figures looming over him, speaking forcefully to each other in words that sounded as if they were coming from behind a wall. He could feel himself gasping, struggling, his heart pounding in his chest, but all the tension suddenly seemed to slip away and the blinding white light was replaced by the softness of a fair-skinned woman smiling at him, as if promising she would keep the nightmares at bay.


	6. Lazarus rising

_**Author's note:**  
_

_Thanks again for the reviews, favorites, and follows. On deck after this one is the first meeting with the Illusive Man and the first half of Freedom's Progress, which is written. Currently working on the second half. There's a possibility the next update won't be so rapid, as I was having second thoughts about how I wrote it, but I think it's pretty much in its finished form. Not disappointed with it or anything, but trying to write a reunion between a confused zombie in emotional turmoil and a shocked young woman is a lot harder than some other writers on this site make it appear. =D  
_

_Regarding the review asking for Tali to join the crew before Horizon: that won't happen, but I will say that Shepard's going to be visiting the Migrant Fleet a lot sooner than you'd expect, and there's already 20k+ words written starting at the shuttle drop into Haestrom. It'll require some touching up due to a couple of minor changes, but I'm quite happy with it, and it all flowed out in one day of writing.  
_

_Enjoy!_

* * *

_The thunder boomed again, but none of them trembled in fear where they all gathered on the covered back porch, sipping their drinks and watching the dark clouds flash with the lightning that seemed to continue without end. Garrus sat well back from the edge of the porch as if he had a deep aversion to water, but most of the others were leaning against the railing, holding their hands out to let the pouring water wash over their bare hands. Tali especially seemed mesmerized, tilting her hand to let the water trickle down her wrist and forearm, and the wide smile hadn't left her face since the rain started. Wrex was chuckling with amusement at the quarian's reaction, though even he held a hand out to let the cool water fall onto his palm._

_ The thunder crashed once more, louder and closer. Close enough to rattle the house and windows, but he was surprised when Tali suddenly yelled his name._

_"Shepard!"_

The voice called out to him in the sudden darkness, but it wasn't familiar, wasn't pleading for him to provide reassurance. The darkness slowly faded into light, a vaguely familiar and uncomfortable brilliance, and he became aware of pain in his side and face. The touch of his hands on those aches felt distant, strange, but the blurry light was slowly coming into focus, and the voice called again, clearer.

_"Shepard, your scars aren't fully healed but I need you get out of that bed, now! This facility is under attack!"_

His muscles seemed to tighten instinctively, pulling him up into a sitting position despite the groan of aching pain that escaped his lips while he reached up and rubbed his eyes to clear them. "What the hell...?" His voice sounded off, hoarse and sluggish, but it appeared he wasn't going to get time to fully wake, as that female voice called out again, impatiently.

_"Get up, Commander! There's armor and a pistol in the locker across the room, but you need to get dressed __**right now!**__"_

Waking like this, exhausted and confused but with someone yelling at him to get up, seemed to trigger the instincts that military recruits quickly learn, driven by the voice of command. Shaking his head, he twisted and slid off the bed, nearly falling to the floor when his muscles took a moment to respond to his weight, but he stumbled a few feet and regained his balance, looking around for the locker the voice had mentioned. There. Despite a slight wobble, he managed to walk briskly to it, grimacing while he swung his stiff, sore arms in circles and craned his neck from side to side to pop a stiff vertebrae. A simple touch of his finger opened the locker, and he squinted in momentary confusion to see the N7 logo on the unfamiliar armor.

"What the hell is going on? Why is a hospital under attack?" His voice still sounded hoarse, but at least it was clear as he yanked the leg armor out and quickly examined it, trying to ignore the sounds of gunfire and explosions off in the distance.

_"There's no time to explain! Just get suited up and armed as quickly as you can!"_

He shrugged and slipped the armor on with practiced ease after devising the various fastenings, and to his relief, it was a perfect fit... and some small proof that his brain was at least functioning properly. Awakening from that sleep had felt like nothing he'd ever experienced before, even general anesthetic following surgery after the thresher maw attack where half his forearm had to be reconstructed due to contact with that vicious acid. Finishing with the last clasp of the breastplate, he yanked the pistol from the locker and checked the charge... what the hell? It was a standard issue M-3 Predator, but...

"Some idiot tore the cooling systems out of this piece of shit!" He barked, but the voice chuckled weakly.

_"Just... keep moving. Look around for small red and grey cylinders. They're thermal clips. Now hurry!"_

_What in the hell is a hospital doing with experimental technology? Only Alliance R&D had those Geth prototypes we sent them._

Shaking his head, he turned toward the door, useless pistol in hand, and slapped the pad, standing back and peering out into the hallway. Another boom shook the facility as he stepped out and gazed around, noting the odd hexagonal logos on the wall and complete lack of any blue or white patterns. _Not an Alliance hospital. Something in the Traverse? Or the Terminus..._

His blood suddenly turned to ice as he remembered his last moments before awakening on that bed, but he kept moving on autopilot, noting a small glint of metal on the floor. Bending, he scooped it up while on the move and examined it for a moment before inserting it into the pistol, which gave a satisfying click while a red light changed to green. Breaking into a jog, he called out to the woman. "What happened to the Normandy? Are the crew safe?"

_"You're the only one of your crew on this station, but just keep moving! We're running out of time!"_

Gritting his teeth, he rounded the corner and slapped the panel of a door, blinking when he saw bipedal forms turning toward him almost comically, their faces white metal and black polymers with a glowing 'eye'. And they had weapons. He dove toward a desk, intending to roll into its cover, but found his head banging off the metal before he scrambled to yank his feet out of the line of fire.

_God, I really __**am **__still out of it._

Twisting, he popped out of cover and drew a bead on one of the advancing mechs, squeezing off a shot that exploded its head. As the others returned fire, he ducked back behind cover, staring at the pistol with surprise. The Predator was a pretty weak... right, thermal clips. "Huh." He suddenly chuckled with amusement and waited for a lull in the fire, leaning out again and calmly squeezing off three shots that picked the heads off the remaining three mechs, smiling when the last metal body toppled over and exploded. His shields had barely shimmered from their shots, at least. Thank the gods for an easy opponent after surgery.

_"Nice shooting, Commander, but keep moving! I swear, I've seen elcor move faster than you!"_

The exasperation in her voice and the gall she had to poke fun at his reflexes made him chuckle while he rose from cover and broke back into a jog, pausing to scoop up a few thermal clips that had fallen from the mechs' broken bodies. He almost protested that he'd just awoken from surgery after... after...

_Fuck, I was __**spaced**__. I __**suffocated**__._

He shook the memories off despite the chill that ran down his spine and kept moving, examining the pistol and quickly figuring out the button that ejected the thermal clip, popping in a new one while the voice guided him through another door to a new toy.

_Great, what does this one take for a power source? Turian livers?_ He scooped it up and found it was a standard M-100 grenade launcher, already charged and loaded. And highly effective on the trio of mechs that came through the door below. Attaching it to his back, he took the elevator down and sprinted through the gout of fire that the explosion had caused, but he found himself in a skid trying to stop his momentum and he bounced off the wall with a grimace.

_What the hell is going on with my body?_

"Shep... need t... p mov..."

The woman's voice broke into gunfire and static, and he tapped his wrist, but no omni-tool sprang to life. With a curse, he kept moving through the halls until he heard gunfire on the other side of a door, but with little recourse, he opened it and took cover when he saw a man ducking behind duraglass while more mechs fired over his head. Leaning out, he fired four times, missing once with a grimace, but the other three hit their mark and the mechs exploded and crumbled. The man turned in surprise when Shepard jogged up and ducked for cover beside him as more mechs came through the door across the gap.

"Shepard, what the hell? I thought you were still a work in progress!" The man looked fit and military, composed despite his surprise while he reloaded his pistol and swept his gaze over Shepard's armored body.

Shaking his head, Shepard rose and picked off two more with head shots, still amused that the little weapon could pack that much punch. "You tell me. Who are you? Why the hell is a medical facility under attack by these dinky little robots? How'd I end up here?" He stayed out of cover, waiting for the door to reopen, and kept firing, taking them down as soon as they were exposed. The dark-skinned man did the same beside him, talking between shots.

"Yeah, sorry, forgot this is all new to you right now. Name's Jacob Taylor, I'm the security officer in charge here under Miranda. Someone hacked our own security mechs, probably trying to kill you." He paused a moment to focus, squeezing off a head shot on a mech while Shepard reloaded behind cover, gazing up at the man with a nod of approval at his marksmanship.

"Explains the mechs. Is Miranda the voice that was yelling at me for moving slower than an elcor?" He allowed himself a slight, amused smirk while he took over for Jacob, leaning up and holding the next wave at bay.

Jacob chuckled and nodded while he pulled out his last clip and popped it in. "Sounds like Miranda. Yeah, she's the program director. I haven't heard from her in a couple minutes, though. Did she go silent, or...?"

Shepard shook his head as the last mech fell, and no more could be seen coming from behind the door. "Comms broke up, but I heard gunfire as it happened. No idea what happened to her." Standing from cover, he checked his pocket and found only one more thermal clip.

Jacob's face tightened in concern, but he shook it off. "I'm sure she's okay. She knows how to handle herself. Come on, we can talk on the way." He turned and led Shepard toward the door, covering him when it slid open, and following his lead when they moved in.

"She didn't tell me what happened to my crew. I'm guessing by the way I feel that I had to go through some serious surgery, long enough for you to know what happened to them." He was pleased that Jacob moved like an experienced infantry officer, steady and keeping their flank covered, but the brief hesitation on the man's face sent a subtle chill down Shepard's spine.

"Ah, yeah, you've been under a while. About half of the crew survived, including your ground team: the asari, quarian, turian, and Chief Williams. Pressly and some of the crew from the lower decks didn't make it out, though." They paused behind cover while Shepard nodded slowly, torn between relief and sadness.

"Well... small favors, I guess. Whatever attacked us just tore through the Normandy like butter." Shaking his head, he gestured for them to keep moving before Jacob's omni-tool beeped and a man's voice spoke up in a harsh whisper.

_"Is anyone else out there? This is Wilson! I need some help!_"

* * *

The voice sounded vaguely familiar, and the face even more so when they found him slumped behind a crate a minute later, snarling at them to grab some medi-gel. Jacob didn't seem particularly inclined to get it while he folded his arms and interrogated the man about his security clearance, and when Shepard came up with an application ready, he felt hesitant to administer it.

"Come on, hurry up, Shepard! Don't let me bleed out down here!"

Shaking his head to clear out the odd suspicion, he knelt and administered the miraculous concoction while he stared at the man. "You look familiar. Have we met before?"

Wilson snorted and slowly relaxed against the crate while the analgesics went to work on his wound. "Yeah, you could say that. I'm the one who brought you back from the dead. You don't remember waking up a couple of days ago?"

The word 'dead' sent a chill down Shepard's spine, but he paused for a moment and glanced up at Jacob. "Right. Thought it was a dream. I'm guessing the woman was Miranda?" Rising to his feet, he helped Wilson up and let him lean on his shoulder while he drew his pistol and Wilson chuckled.

"Yeah, that was her. Figures, she pours two years into this project and then ends up taken out by her own mechs – shit! More of them!"

An electric blast from Wilson's omni-tool took out a stack of explosives beside the advancing mechs, which was a relief to the two soldiers with nearly empty clip pouches. "Jacob, help Wilson. I'll take point." Shepard led the way, pausing to scoop up two more clips, slipping one into Jacob's pouch and one into his own while they rounded a corner. "What were you saying about two years, Wilson?"

Jacob shot the man a warning glare, and Wilson grimaced before speaking as he limped along beside the lieutenant. "Experimental procedures we've been working on for two years. You were the first one we got to test them on. You were dead, Shepard... but we brought you back."

_God, so I really did suffocate out there above the planet._ Another chill ran down his spine, but once more, he shook it off and led them up the stairs. "Well... thanks for that. Remind me to get you all fruit baskets or something." Shepard and Jacob shared a quiet chuckle before they stepped out into a large, tiered area across from the shuttle bay. As if on cue, a few more mechs unfolded their ungainly bodies and lifted their weapons while Jacob pushed Wilson behind cover and dove for some himself on the other side of the stairs. Shepard stood out in the open, taking aim on the nearest mech while bullet impacts made his shields shimmer, and he took out two before he rolled into cover as his shields crackled and fell away. Jacob dropped the third and chuckled.

"Commander, I know your rep, but if you get wasted by a bunch of mechs, mine goes into the toilet."

Smirking, Shepard slipped out of cover and reloaded while his shields shimmered and finished recharging, leading them up the stairs toward the next level. "Bad habit I picked up from a krogan. Come on, that shuttle is looking better every second." As they reached the next tier, the now-familiar sound of unfolding and awakening mechs reached them and a trio of them on each side activated, rising out from cover. Cursing, Jacob pulled Wilson back into cover while Shepard took one in the head, but the blow was glancing and only knocked it off balance. He threw out his hand with a blue glow, expecting it to topple over from the simple push, but it flew into the pair behind it, knocking them all over. He could only blink in surprise before he felt the impact of a half-dozen rounds on the back of his shields, and he dove after Jacob when they shattered.

"All right, point taken." They shared another chuckle and stayed in cover as the mechs advanced, picking them apart with aimed fire. When only one remained, Shepard gave it an experimental biotic push, and instead of stumbling, it fell over before Jacob dispatched it with a headshot. Shaking his head, he scavenged for clips with the lieutenant, taking a moment to glance down at Wilson, who was leaning heavily against a crate. "What did you do, overclock my amp or something?"

Wilson smirked and shook his head, limping up the stairs toward them. "New one. Replaced your L3 with an L5n."

Thought it seemed a nice upgrade, he scowled at the thought that they'd run the risk of brain damage just to give him something he hadn't asked for, especially if it was some new experimental prototype. He opened his mouth to protest, but Jacob clapped his shoulder and grabbed Wilson around the waist again. "Come on, Shepard, let's get out of here. Plenty of time to answer questions on our way out of the system." Shepard frowned, but nodded and led the way, noting the way Jacob paused for a moment to gaze back the way they came before the dark-skinned man just sighed and shook his head, following along until Jacob and Wilson worked on the locked door.

Shepard turned at the sound of the gunshot just in time to see Wilson fall, blood spraying from his throat, and he nearly pulled the trigger on the woman before he blinked in recognition and Jacob reached up to gently push the pistol aside. "Miranda, what the _hell_ are you doing?"

"My job. Wilson betrayed us and tried to kill Shepard." She was the same beautiful face he remembered from that brief moment of awakening that felt like a dream, but instead of a smile, her features were drawn into a tight line while they gazed at Shepard. Jacob was shaking his head and looking down at the dead man.

"You sure about that, Miranda? We've known Wilson for years."

Miranda scoffed and turned her attention to her lieutenant. "And you didn't trust him, either. He was the one who reprogrammed the mechs." Shepard had been gazing between them with slowly mounting suspicion, one he couldn't explain, and the woman seemed to recognize that, holstering her weapon and activating her omni-tool to give him a bio-scan. "Glad to see you made it, Commander. You seem quite recovered, aside from your scarring." Deactivating her omni-tool, she gestured them through the door, but arched a brow when Shepard didn't move, gesturing for her to go first instead.

"Ladies first."

Miranda's lips formed a small smirk and she stepped through while Shepard followed cautiously, his hand on the grip of his pistol. Something wasn't quite right, and despite her almost angelic appearance over his bed, he could tell first impressions weren't everything when it came to this woman.

* * *

Five minutes later, he finally broke his silence when they shot away from the space station, Miranda and Jacob at the helm seats while he knelt behind them, watching as the stars gave way to the swirling blue of the mass effect field that boosted them into FTL. "All right, time for some answers."

Jacob twisted in his seat to face Shepard, nodding his agreement. "Yeah, you deserve some, Shepard. Go ahead." Miranda didn't turn and instead kept her focus on her navigation plots, though Jacob raised a brow her way as if expecting opposition. When none came, he shrugged and nodded at the commander.

_Where to start? _ He thought it over for a moment and then nodded his head at the pistol on Jacob's belt. "Where did all the thermal clips come from? As far as I know, my team was the first to discover that tech, and we sent it to Alliance R&D just a few weeks ago."

Jacob glanced at Miranda, but she didn't notice or didn't acknowledge it. Sighing, he rubbed a hand over his nearly bald head and shook it slowly. "Yeah... all right. Shepard, the two years Wilson mentioned? We haven't just been working on the tech that long. We've been working on _you. _It's been two years since the Normandy was attacked."

Those few subtle chills he'd felt aboard the station were nothing compared to the one that ran down his spine as he stared at the man, finding nothing but resigned honesty and perhaps the hint of an apology. He wasn't aware of his own slowly shaking head before he found his voice again. "Two... years? That's... sorry, I'm having a hard time with that one." Jacob nodded and lifted his hand, pulling up his omni-tool and pulling up a Citadel news feed.

_"Two years after the geth attack on Eden Prime, rebuilding efforts are still underway. The Alliance has received unexpected help from the Turian Hierarchy and the Asari Republics, who released a joint statement-"_

Jacob deactivated the omni-tool while Shepard stared hard at the man's wrist, finally shaking his head after a long moment. "That's... what the hell?"

Miranda finally turned in her seat and shook her head slowly. "You suffocated over Alchera and entered the planet's atmosphere, Commander. When we recovered you, well... let's just say no one else would have done anything but sent your remains to your mother for burial. But our boss poured over four billion credits into bringing you back to life, though we'll let him explain why."

While she spoke, Shepard had leaned back against the bulkhead that separated the cockpit from the cabin, staring down at his gloved hands, moving them slowly. Jacob only looked on in silence, sympathetic but concerned, as he recalled what he'd said to Miranda a year before about being near Shepard when the truth came out. Fortunately, the stunned commander found his voice again. "That explains why I felt so damned out of it when I woke up." _And those moments when it felt like my body wasn't responding properly. And the biotic upgrades. And... gods. Mom? Tali? Liara? Garrus? Ash? Anderson? Two years? What will I __**say**__ to them?_

He could only shake his head again, sighing heavily and leaning his head back against the wall while he looked up at Jacob, raising a brow as if expecting him to add whatever was on his mind. The lieutenant nodded and didn't even bother glancing at Miranda this time. "Yeah, well, you were really damaged, Commander. Miranda can give you the details, but they had to use a lot of tech and cybernetics to repair your body and get you functioning again."

"And some cloned tissue and organ replacements." Miranda added while the blue eyes went wide with a sudden horror. She headed off the question with a shake of her head. "No, you yourself are not a clone. Your brain is yours, and most of your body is original, but we had to reinforce a lot of shattered bones with implants, replace decayed muscle tissue with synthetic weaves, and clone a few organs and most of your skin."

"And your implant was damaged, so they upgraded that, like Wilson said." Jacob added helpfully, but Shepard was staring down at his flexing hands again.

"So... I'm Frankenstein's monster, only not?" His eyes hardened when he looked back up at them. "Why in the hell would the Alliance spend that much money to bring me back? They were quick to send me off into the Terminus to hunt down wayward geth instead of listening to what we all had to say."  
Miranda shot Jacob a warning glare, but the lieutenant only leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees and clasping his hands together in an attempt to look as non-threatening as possible while he spoke, uncomfortable at the sharp gaze Shepard's eyes were giving him. "It wasn't the Alliance, Commander. They declared you killed in action. It was-"

"Jacob..." Miranda warned, but he shook his head and continued.

"It was Cerberus."

Miranda grimaced, but Jacob used all his willpower to remain still while Shepard yanked his pistol off his belt and held it at the ready between them, a scowl on his face and a deadly gleam in his eyes while he slowly stood. "I'd ask if that was a bad joke, Jacob, but..."

"I know." Jacob nodded slowly while Miranda only sighed quietly, but kept her hands clasped on her lap in view of Shepard. "I'm sorry I wasn't honest on the station, Commander, but I didn't want to drop all that on you in the middle of a fight."

Despite the frantic thoughts that were running through his mind, he gazed down at Jacob and nodded slowly. "Good idea. I would have shot you on the spot." Flicking his eyes over to the calm Miranda, he narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "I'm guessing you're high enough on the food chain to know about Cerberus' involvement with Akuze? With Admiral Kahoku? The other monstrosities I shut down?"

Miranda nodded. "Yes, I'm aware of them. We've had our share of rogue units over the years, but the organization is dedicated to the advancement and protection of humanity. Nothing more, nothing less. Sometimes that leads to operations... overstepping their bounds."

Shepard snorted and resisted the urge to put a round through her head, though his hand flexed hard enough on the grip of the pistol to make the polymer creak in protest. " 'Protection of humanity'? Remind me to tell the only other survivor from Akuze that when he's still having nightmares about having thresher maw acid injected into his veins."

Jacob tensed and shot a hard glance over at Miranda, who nodded slowly, choosing her words carefully. "I understand you don't trust us, Commander. And while the Illusive Man will be the first to admit mistakes were made, he'll also tell you he's no saint and he's dedicated to humanity as a whole, accepting the risks he takes in giving his operatives broad operational discretion."

_Fancy way of saying he's a ruthless son of a bitch who only gets pissed when his operations run the risk of giving him bad press._

Glaring at her, he lowered the pistol subtly away from her and shook his head. "So why bring _me _back? I imagine I'm the biggest thorn he's ever had in his side."

Miranda nodded her agreement, but shrugged. "You are, but you're also a symbol for humanity, and worth every credit he poured into you and every one that was lost on the operations you shut down. The rest, I'll let him explain. We'll be docking at another Cerberus station within the hour, and Commander, while I know you could kill us both and take the shuttle, please at least let him explain everything to you before you make any decisions. You may find that while we're not friends, our primary goals are more similar than you'd expect."

Jacob nodded up at Shepard. "She's right, Commander. Just a couple of hours, that's all we're asking."

Shepard stared at him for a long moment before he held out his empty hand. Miranda gave it a curious glance, but Jacob slowly pulled his pistol from his belt and handed it over. As Shepard attached it to his own belt, Miranda followed suit with a scowl, and he tossed it back into the passenger compartment. With that settled, he leaned back against the dividing wall and stared out the window. "I won't shoot you in the back of the head. You'll have my answer in a minute."

They nodded and turned back to the flight controls while he gazed out the cockpit window, reaching up to rub his aching jaw.

_Maybe it __**is**__ really all a bad joke, or a nightmare. Tali, Garrus, I could really use your help on this one._


	7. Meet the new boss

**_Author's note:_**

**__**_Got a little delayed, but chapter 8's almost ready and should be up soon. Leave a couple of nice reviews and maybe I'll even post it tonight. Yeah, that's right. Blackmail. Bribery. Whatever.  
_

_It's a shame, I came up with the whole 'eezo exposure + cloned implants' thing when I first changed classes from soldier to vanguard. Little did I know it was already a popular theory! Oh well. =)  
_

* * *

Yesterday he'd been going about his duties, his biggest concern being whether or not Tali was avoiding him. Today, he was a Cerberus-created zombie, on one of their shuttles, heading for one of their facilities. Except yesterday was two years ago, and today felt like an unending nightmare.

Sighing quietly, he pressed the knuckles of his free hand against the side of the pistol he still gripped, cracking them and ignoring the way Miranda and Jacob tensed for a brief moment at the sound. The sight brought a small, vicious smirk to his lips, though. After discovering Corporal Toombs and the truth behind Akuze, he'd torn into the Cerberus operations he'd found with a vengeance and a smile upon his lips each time he killed one of their operatives. Wrex, Ash, and Garrus had wholeheartedly approved. Kaidan, Liara, and Tali had been worried about him, but he'd assuaged their worries when he delayed a mission to a Cerberus outpost to head to Feros without hesitation upon receiving news of the geth attack.

The smirk faded when he remembered Admiral Kahoku. The man had poured every resource he had into investigating Cerberus, had even turned to the Shadow Broker, but it had only revealed one facility of an organization that could afford to pour over four billion credits into one man. Shepard often acted on impulse, trusting his instincts over a plan, but this time his instincts weren't overpowering his thoughts, which were working on overdrive.

_Shoot them and return to the Alliance, to your life, or spend some time on the inside of Cerberus gathering intel? You know which one Kahoku would pick. Which one Anderson would pick._

Sighing again, he rubbed he back of his neck and rolled his head to pop his stiff vertebrae, watching Miranda typing up a mission report while Jacob ran diagnostics on the shuttle's starboard thrusters. The sight brought back a memory, of his squad sitting around the mess table sharing a meal while he wrote up the after action report and Tali examined readouts of the performance of the drive core, trying to ignore Garrus' teasing about her immune system and the loud arguments between Ash and Wrex over who'd shot more Geth. At that moment, he wanted nothing more than to go find them all again, to hug his mother, but he knew what most of them would say.

"All right. I'll give your boss one chance to speak his piece, but if I don't like what I hear, you two had better start running."

The stiffening of their bodies made him smirk again, though Miranda managed two words.

"Understood, Commander."

* * *

When they exited the airlock, Miranda took a seat in front of a terminal while Jacob pointed him toward a weapons locker across the room with a slight nod. He had a feeling the lieutenant was doing everything he could to make him more comfortable, and when he had an Avenger and a Mantis strapped to his back, he appreciated the gesture, giving him a nod in return.

"The Illusive Man is waiting for you downstairs, Commander," Miranda reminded him, and he gave them both a cautious glance before he proceeded down the steps and into a dark room. When he stepped into the middle, a holographic wire-frame slowly came to life and he arched a brow. He'd read about experimental communications interfaces utilizing quantum entanglement when he'd had access to Spectre reports, but this was surprising. Clearly, Cerberus was better connected and better funded than he'd expected. And it seemed the 'Illusive Man' was intelligent enough not to meet with him face-to-face for their first meeting.

During the few moments it took for the communications to establish, he ran back through the rough ideas he'd come up on the shuttle. _Be suspicious, guarded, but curious. Make it clear you don't trust him, but you expect answers for what's going on. Yelling at him like a child won't get you anywhere, and pretending to agree with everything won't exactly be believable. God, I hate acting._

When the orange wire-frame shimmered and formed a holographic image of a wide, black expanse of office with a swirling star at the centerpiece, he took a quick glance around before he focused on the man in the elegant, tailored suit and silver hair who was already watching him from his seat, a cigarette smoldering in his hand.

"Commander Shepard."

He couldn't resist the tightness that set in his jaw when he gazed at the softly glowing eyes the man possessed, a reminder of the rogue turian spectre he'd put down only two weeks... two years... before. It took more effort than he expected to restrain the growl he wanted to utter as he folded his arms across his chest. "Illusive Man. I hear you're responsible for all of this."

The man took a slow, casual drag on his cigarette, meeting the gaze of blue eyes with his own as if sizing up an opponent before he exhaled and nodded. "Indeed. And I imagine your curiosity regarding my motivations is tempered by hatred for my organization."

"As you expected, I imagine." Shepard studied the man just as he was studied in turn, receiving a reply while smoke billowed from the man's nose.

"Of course. And were you any other man, I would have been pleased to be rid of such a dangerous threat, but humanity is facing a threat greater than any we've encountered in our brief existence."

"The Reapers."

The Illusive Man nodded and stubbed out his cigarette, rising to his feet and approaching the holopad. "I see your memory is intact. I'll come right to the point: we're at war. Humanity is under attack, but the Alliance won't acknowledge it and the Council denies the threat."

Shepard's eyes narrowed subtly where they met the man's gaze. "Somehow, I'm not surprised. I imagine Miranda or Jacob would have told me already if the Reapers had invaded, so..." He left the question unspoken, raising a brow inquisitively.

"Entire human colonies have been disappearing without a trace. We suspect it's an agent of the Reapers, as Saren and the Geth aided Sovereign... and you were their destroyer. You're uniquely qualified to investigate the threat... and to end it."

Shepard regarded him for a long moment before he turned slowly, reaching up to stroke a fingertip along the fresh scars on his cheek in a thoughtful motion. "You have the resources to train and equip an entire army or a fleet, and you resurrect one soldier who's been a thorn in your side?" He turned back around to regard the man, letting the suspicion play across his face.

Shrugging, the Illusive Man pulled a silver case from a breast pocket and plucked out another cigarette as he turned back toward his chair. "An army or a fleet would attract unwanted attention, would provoke the Council and the Alliance. You, on the other hand, are no common soldier. You're a symbol, trusted by both groups, and you've proven you have better luck breaking through the blindness of bureaucrats to reveal the truth than anyone else alive." He took his seat and lit the cigarette, exhaling as he crossed his legs and continued. "And you have one qualification that's impossible to deny: you killed a Reaper. I don't know if they understand fear, but you killed one of them. They have to respect that."

The Illusive Man picked up a glass and took a sip while Shepard folded his arms and gazed past him at the swirling corona of the star that formed the backdrop of the office, letting the tension in his jaw speak for his suspicion and the distant gaze for his working mind. It was all plausible, and there had been no attempts at sweet-talking by this calm and collected son of a bitch. No stun grenades thrown down into the room to render him unconscious, no attempts to persuade him with evidence that might not even exist, if the colonies were indeed vanishing without any trace. No, he didn't think the man was lying, but he knew just how he wanted this relationship to play out: king and pawn, though whether he really believed it could work like that was open for debate.

After that long moment, Shepard returned his gaze to the Illusive Man's over the faint red glow of the cigarette. "You're right about one thing. The Reapers are the greatest threat we've ever faced, and the disappearances aren't something to be ignored. I'll investigate it, but not as your puppet, and not without sharing anything I learn with Councilor Anderson."

"I'm not foolish enough to think you'd consider replacing that N7 logo with our emblem, Shepard, but that's the compromise I was hoping for. The Council may be blind, but Anderson is not." He set down his glass and tapped his console to pull up a holographic image of a planet. "This is the latest colony to be abducted: Freedom's Progress. I have a shuttle waiting, and Miranda and Jacob are ready to accompany you and take your orders."

His eyebrow twitched imperceptibly at one of those two selections, though he wasn't likely to find anyone else on this station who would be a more agreeable choice. "I have no problem with Jacob, but Miranda gunned down Wilson in cold blood."

The Illusive Man shrugged and exhaled another cloud of smoke. "As you did with one of my employees when you learned what he'd done to Corporal Toombs. I hold no grudge, and Miranda understands the stakes. As with me, there may be no love lost, but you can trust her to follow your lead and do what's necessary to end the threat."

Shepard had to restrain a scowl at the mention of that scientist and the corporal, but he acquiesced with a nod. "Good enough. If we don't find anything, though, Miranda and Jacob will be returning without me."

A shrug accompanied the stubbing of the cigarette in its ashtray. "I understand. We'll never be friends, Shepard, but I do trust you to do everything in your power to safeguard the galaxy as a whole, humanity included. But I'll ask you to consider this: we have vast resources at our disposal, and I can guarantee that you won't find the Council or the Alliance receptive to the idea of giving you another ship to continue your charge as you see fit. I, however, would." Standing, he nodded at Shepard. "See what you can find. Even if you come up as empty as we have in the past, I can promise you I have no interest in wasting the investment I've made in resurrecting you, and that our own investigation won't stop there."

Shepard regarded him a moment and nodded, turning and walking out as the hologram faded away.

* * *

"So his biotics _are_ stronger? Noticeably?" Miranda and Jacob were talking over the glow of her terminal when he reached the top of the steps, pausing to listen to them.

"As far as I can tell, yeah. He was pretty surprised about a simple push of about... six hundred newtons, maybe."

"Hmm..." Miranda mused, gazing out the window at the stars. "Perhaps it's more than just the implant, after all."

They turned to face him when he approached, a brow arched at the information he'd just overheard. "Something I should know?"

Miranda nodded and gestured him over to her terminal, where she pulled up a diagram of his nervous system, including the implant nestled near his brain stem. "We had a theory during your reconstruction that all the element zero you were exposed to from the drive core explosion and the atmospheric contamination might have affected your cloned implants, and it may have turned out to be true. Your new implant is a serious upgrade over the L3s, but going off of Jacob's description, your biotics sound a little too powerful to be due to solely the upgrade."

_Well, that's a new one. 'Kid develops biotics at 29.' 31. Whatever._

He chuckled quietly and shook his head. "I won't complain as long as L5s don't get headaches like the L2s did. And some of my old squad always wanted to chuckle at me whenever I gave something a little 50 newton shove."

Jacob grinned at the sound of that quiet sound of amusement and shrugged. "I've been laughed at by an asari biotic before, but yeah, that sounds rough."

Miranda turned away from the monitor and gazed at Shepard. "So, should we be going?"

Shepard nodded and pulled their pistols from his belt, handing them over. "Yeah, let's go. If we don't find anything, I'm camping out until an Alliance patrol can give me a lift to Arcturus, and your boss is already aware."

They clipped their weapons on and Miranda pursed her lips but shook her comment off as she fell into step behind him alongside Jacob, who nodded. "Works for me, Commander. I've got to say, though, I hope we do find something, because Cerberus or not, we agree you're our best chance at stopping these disappearances."

Ahead of them, he grimaced and shook his head, opening the door to the airlock. Somehow, that kind of faith didn't feel right coming from someone with that logo on his chest, though he would have smiled if it had been a disgruntled turian C-Sec officer or a feisty quarian girl saying it.

"We'll see," was all he said in reply as they entered the shuttle.

* * *

The trip was only a few hours' flight time, and he and Jacob spent it going over his biotic potential in the passenger compartment while Miranda handled the flying. Though most practice was basically out of the question when they were six inches' worth of metal from vacuum, Jacob managed to show him how to create a barrier that would hold off an aggressive toddler for about ten seconds and gave him a refresher on enhancing the strength of his body's physical blows. By the time they landed (and two energy drinks of questionable taste but high nutrient content later), the barrier could hold off a salarian for about two punches. Jacob didn't pull his own punches, and revealed that his own could take approximately two krogan headbutts, though he was optimistic regarding Shepard's potential.

He'd studied the colony's layout on the terminal from the time they entered orbit and was familiar with it when they touched down and stepped out. It figured, really. First Mindoir, then Elysium, and then Eden Prime and Feros, and now this. Human colonies always seemed to spell bad luck, which was why he hadn't vacationed on one since the Blitz. Jacob noticed his hesitation and paused beside him. "You okay, Commander?"

Shepard pushed the thoughts aside and nodded, pulling his Avenger from his back and checking the thermal clip. "Yeah. Just seems like every time I set foot on one of our colonies, things either go to hell or are already there. Let's move out."

They fell into step beside him, shotgun and SMG drawn. Miranda and Jacob had already given him a briefing on their skills, and while they were biotics, it felt odd to have a woman in a catsuit and a man in what could barely pass as armor beside him. Still, Jacob had already proven to be adept with a pistol and infantry tactics, and Miranda was doing the same as they advanced through the colony, which felt more like ruins at this point. _No trees, no fields of grass, no houses... just prefabs and quarries. Why would anyone want to live here?_

Miranda hit the door to exit one of the prefabs and the now-familiar sound of LOKI mechs unfolding made him scowl while he slid into cover... feet-first this time, and as expected, he had to press harder to stop his momentum than he'd anticipated. While Miranda and Jacob slid in beside him, he rose and fired a burst across the gap into the head of one, the explosion knocking its neighbor over. Jacob and Miranda shared a glanced and raised brows when they heard Shepard chuckle, but they were firing beside him a moment later when more mechs came out the door of another unit to the north.

"Someone had to reprogram those mechs for them to be firing on humans like this! There must be a survivor!" Miranda zapped a LOKI mech before two small mechs on four legs came dashing around the corner.

"What the hell are those? Mech dogs?" Shepard asked after he blew one apart and knelt back behind cover to reload after just a split second of confusion when his rifle stopped firing without beeping at him.

"FENRIS mechs," Jacob replied. "Yeah, think attack dogs. No threat until they're chewing at you while you're pinned down. Zapping you. Whatever." He chuckled when he noticed Shepard's grin while he tore apart another LOKI with a quick burst in the head, and Miranda overloaded another FENRIS with a wave of her omni-tool. With their opposition down, they all rose and reloaded, and Shepard became aware there was a smile on his own face. Maybe Tali was right... part krogan, indeed. More likely, though, he just felt comfortable in this element, despite everything that had happened in the last twelve hours. From confusion, with time to think and worry, to the immediate of combat. Wrex might not like that explanation, but it was as good as any.

Shaking off those thoughts, he led them forward, kicking aside a chunk of exploded mech. "Always wished we could have had dogs aboard ship."

"Maybe you can get some fish," Miranda suggested, earning her a chuckle while they moved into the next prefab.

"We'll see."

* * *

Tali's sigh came out sounding like more of a growl when the rest of the squad rushed on ahead, following Prazza's lead. Despite her confidence in front of Kal'Reegar two days ago, she'd been worried they wouldn't accept the lead of someone they hadn't worked with before, and she had just been proven correct. As soon as they'd identified the incoming shuttle as Cerberus, Prazza had yelled at the squad to get moving, but whether it was fear, pride, or a genuine desire to reach Veetor before the humans did, she had no idea. The man had been an insufferable idiot since she'd first met him at the shuttle. Shaking the thoughts off, she kept her fingers flying over her omni-tool to get the door that led to the eastern line of prefabs hacked and opened before they did something stupid... or ran into something too tough for them to handle. She was listening to them on the comm while they engaged a small group of mechs when she noticed movement to the side and glanced over, seeing a trio of humans advancing along the western row of buildings. Tali couldn't help but blink when she noticed how familiar the movements of the distant, light-skinned human were, but she shook it off and called Prazza over the comm.

"Prazza, there's three humans coming up the west side. Be careful."

_"We'll take care of them once we're done with these mechs and have Veetor... keelah! Heavy mech! Get to cover!"_

Tali cursed and redoubled her efforts on the door, rushing through it when it finally opened.

* * *

They fought through a few handfuls of mechs and some security drones, but they posed little challenge, and Shepard exercised his biotics by throwing some halfway across the courtyard after Jacob pulled them into the air. He had to admit, the sound that the destabilizing mass effect fields made when they exploded was oddly rewarding. The sight of the mechs flying through the air like punted footballs while they wailed electronically amused him as well, and his quiet laughter drew Miranda and Jacob's stares, despite their extensive reading on his psychological profile. "Glad to see you're having fun, Commander," Miranda remarked dryly as their last opponent flew off toward the water in the quarry, and he simply shrugged and smiled tightly.

"Find your entertainment where you can get it. Come on, let's head for that loading bay."

As they moved toward the large door, they heard muffled gunfire on the other side, and the Cerberus opeatives took up positions flanking the door while he took cover behind crates in the center, pulling up his omni-tool to take a reading. The external unit around his wrist was a temporary, and though Miranda had offered to set him up with the standard implanted unit before they left, he'd politely declined, opting to wait until he could get one from a source he could trust. The readings the omni-tool gave him made him blink in surprise. "What the...? I'm reading quarians on the other side of those doors, and a large mech unit."

Miranda and Jacob pulled up their own readings, and the lieutenant cursed. "Yeah, a damn YMIR. Heavily armed and armored: picture an oversized krogan with a chain gun and a rocket launcher. It's going to be a bitch to take down, Commander."

* * *

Tali cursed Prazza's name as she emerged from the prefab and grabbed Ela'Wanyu by the shoulders, tugging her toward the relative safety of a crate while she grimaced at the sound of the YMIR mech's gun winding up and firing again, resulting in a scream of agony. When they were out of the mech's field of vision, she yanked Ela's medkit from her arm pocket and ripped it open frantically, injecting the painkillers and emergency dose of antibiotics into the woman's implant port beneath her hood while she tried desperately to block out the screams and gunfire that were echoing off the stone. That was when she heard another mechanical voice, this one more distant.

"Online." The second YMIR unfolded and activated across the courtyard, stepping out from behind the prefab building to catch the squad in a crossfire.

* * *

"Shit, there's _two_ of them!" Jacob swore as he dove into cover beside Miranda while Shepard peered around the loading door, grimacing.

"I'm guessing that's a bad thing. Jacob, Miranda, take the one on the west. Just keep it distracted, get inside the building, whittle down its shields. I'll take the one on the east."

"Commander, are you _serious?_ You're going off by yourself?" Miranda stared at him as if she expected her gaze alone would convince him to stay with them.

"Yeah, so try not to get killed. I'm just starting to not hate you both." Shepard wheeled around the cover of the wall and fired a dozen shots at the closer mech that Miranda and Jacob would be handling, getting its attention. "GO!" They both shook their heads, but sprinted for the building while Shepard took off in the other direction, his cybernetically enhanced speed putting him out of the YMIR's programmed firing range just as the last few rounds it fired broke through his shields and hit his armor with glancing blows. As he reached the eastern prefab, he grimaced when he saw its YMIR fire a missile at a running quarian male who was making for the cover of a crate. The missile struck at his feet and sent him flying with a spray of blood while the crate flew into the back of another quarian who was leaning over an injured comrade, and she fell limply over the body of her friend. _Fuck, these things are nasty._

* * *

Tali blinked her eyes open, confused when she found herself staring down at the stone of the ground and felt her stomach pressing on something hard. Pushing up with her hands, she gasped at the pain that ran down her spine, and she fell to the side with a whimper, reaching behind to her back, which had taken the full impact of the crate. That was when she saw the mech approaching. Desperately, she tried to scramble to her feet, but found her legs were barely moving in sporadic jerks, and she could only roll onto her back and attempt to scurry backwards, using her elbows to push her supine body along the ground. She knew she wouldn't reach anything in time, though, and just kept scrambling backward while she stared at the hulking form that advanced without hatred or pity, driven simply by programming to advance to optimal range and finish off the wounded target. Tali felt her back bump into the stairs that led up into the safety of the prefab, but it was no comfort as the mech stopped and its gun began to wind up.

_I'm sorry, father. I promised I'd let you make up for everything when your project was done, but... please don't blame yourself._

Tali closed her wet eyes and waited for death.


	8. Reunited

The helmet's audio filters muted some of the deafening volume, but the YMIR mech's chaingun still roared in her ears while she squeezed her eyes tightly shut, waiting for the agony that would consume her before blackness descended. But the only pain she felt was a rush of heat on her thigh before she heard a loud hiss and she cracked open her eyelids to see the heat venting from the mech's arm cannon. She blinked and gazed down at her body, but saw only a bright line of blood on her left thigh from a glancing shot, and her suit had already clamped down to seal against her skin and had injected a heavy dose of antibiotics. The display inside her helmet indicated her shields had been taken down, which wasn't a surprise, but..._ How did it miss so many shots...? Not that it matters..._

She was stunned when she looked up to see that the mech was no longer even aiming at her. Its cannon arm was pointed up at the window of the prefab above her, spinning up once more while a staccato burst of assault rifle fire made its heavy shields ripple subtly.

_Keelah, I thought they were all dead!_

The mech's cannon came to life again, and Tali winced, praying it wasn't stupid Prazza, who just might be dumb enough not to take cover the moment it started firing. Yanking her pistol from her hip, she fired at the mech's red optics, but her rounds barely made an impact on its shielding... and only made her a higher priority on its threat list. While its cannon vented again, it rotated back to her, and she belatedly realized how stupid she had been to reengage it instead of climbing up to cover. Before it could fire, a dark figure clad in charcoal grey armor dropped in front of her, shielding her from the mech's cannon fire. She could only gasp and watch as the red optics of the juggernaut stared down at the man who'd dropped in front of her, its cannon and missile arms both raising to take aim at its newest priority, but before the weapons roared to life again, the man – it could only have been a human – leaped forward and grabbed both arms, slowly bending them up to aim harmlessly toward the sky while he growled with the effort.

Tali gasped audibly at the sight while the weapons fired uselessly. _He's not even using biotics! What... _That was when she heard the man _laughing, _and her heart skipped a beat.

Suddenly glowing with a fierce blue, he yanked hard with a roar of effort and the arms creaked in protest before they ripped free in a shower of sparks and a hideous screech of rent metal and zapping electricity. He let them drop and twisted his body to slam a boot into the mech's knee joint, denting it. Another kick bent it, and a third resulted in an eruption of sparks while the mech toppled over with a loud crash onto its side.

_Keelah, that's impossible. Please tell me he's friendly._

The man chuckled again and stepped over to the head while the glowing red optics tracked him. Taking a firm grip, he yanked hard with a swirling aura of azure energy and the head ripped free in another shower of sparks and arcing electricity. She watched the man tilt his head, examining the dying optics for a moment before he tossed it aside with an amused, satisfied chuckle, muttering to himself. "Frankenstein."

_Keelah, he moves and laughs and talks like... like..._

The man pulled a Mantis from his back and took aim at the remaining mech across the courtyard which was firing up at the windows of the western prefab, pausing a moment to exhale half his breath before he fired. Sparks erupted from its head and it turned to address the newest threat, but he calmly reloaded and fired another shot, nailing it through the optics. One final shot and three seconds later, it exploded, and she heard a distant voice whoop in victory. Chuckling, the man secured his rifle and put his fingers to his ear. "Miranda, Jacob, all clear on this side. I'm going to tend to the quarian wounded over here. You two do the same, and if you reply with anything other than 'Understood', I'm leaving _your_ asses on this colony...Good. Shepard out."

Tali's heart had been skipping beats while she was watching him fire on the other mech, but it completely stopped for a moment when she heard his voice.

"Sh-Shepard...?"

The soft, quivering voice behind him sent a chill down the length of his spine and his entire body tensed. It wasn't possible. Hell, quarians probably all sounded alike beneath those helmets. But he still turned slowly and Tali gasped when she saw the face that stared down at her. "Shepard!" Her voice came out in a strangled cry.

"Tali!" He leaped over the mech's corpse and dashed over to her where she lay reclined against the steps, sliding the last few feet on his knees and slipping an arm under her back to lift her off the sharp edges of the stairs while he cradled the back of her head and stared down at her. He could see those glimmering silver eyes just _staring_ at him beneath the helmet, and after a moment they vanished from sight while she uttered a gasping wail and threw her arms around his neck, pulling herself up tightly into his embrace.

_I guess it's not a nightmare._

He heard her sobbing quietly in her helmet and felt a pair of tears welling beneath his own eyelids as he clutched her tightly, but after a long moment he leaned back and gazed down at her, noticing the four-inch tear in her suit leg and the glistening line of blood. His own heart skipped a beat at that while he gently laid her back against the stairs and tugged the medkit from one of her arm pockets, popping the case open before he felt her hands on his arm. "I... Shepard, I can wait. Bring me over to Ela!" She pointed at the quarian he'd seen her fall over after the crate struck her, and he looked between them hesitantly for a moment before he nodded and slid the medkit over to the fallen woman, standing. His stomach was an icy ball with worry over her suit puncture and the hit she'd taken, but he couldn't help but smile faintly while he leaned down and slid his arms beneath her back and knees, lifting her into his arms. She'd always been so damned selfless.

Beneath her helmet, Tali couldn't help but smile like an idiot when he lifted her in his arms, enjoying that brief moment, despite her confusion, before he set her down beside Ela and her quarian upbringing took over again. Pulling up her omni-tool, she scanned the woman. While she scanned, Shepard grabbed the medkit and set it on Ela's chest in reach of Tali before he turned to scan the courtyard, pulling up his omni-tool. After a moment, his heart sank. Ela was the only quarian still alive on eastern half of the courtyard. "Miranda, status?" Tali was carefully applying medi-gel to the shoulder wound Ela had taken, but spared a glance while Shepard frowned, finger pressed to his ear. After a moment, he sighed and nodded. "All right. Bring him over to us, then do a sweep for any more mechs."

"...Only one more survivor?" Tali's voice was a soft, distant thing, and he could only nod while he knelt beside her and pulled a few suit patches from one of her arm pockets.

"Yeah... two through-and-through wounds to the abdomen and side, but he's not bleeding too badly." He unfolded one of the patches and ripped it in half, setting it beside Ela's wound while Tali nodded silently, sterilizing the gel-sealed skin before she applied the patch. Some unspoken weight had fallen over them both while Tali busied herself with the first aid, and Shepard pointed to a spot beside Tali while Miranda and Jacob approached, carrying the quarian between them. They set him down and drew their weapons, moving off. Jacob appeared somewhat concerned when he shot a glance back at them, but Miranda just looked annoyed when she did the same. At that moment, Shepard was sorely tempted to put a bullet in her knee out of spite, but he scowled and instead pulled out the quarian male's medkit and the packet of antiseptic inside.

"Shepard... that shuttle... their logos..." Tali voice was still quiet while she put the finishing touches on Ela's wound, and she didn't look up at him while he sterilized the two wounds on his patient's front side.

_Gods, how do I explain what's happened?_ He shook his head slowly and pulled out the medi-gel to seal the bleeding punctures in the man's skin. "Yeah. _Cerberus_."

Tali's stomach had been as icy as his was moments before, but now it only grew colder, despite the venom in his voice when he hissed the name. She whimpered quietly at the pain in her back when she pushed off on her hands to slide over to Soltor'Dival and she noticed the concerned glance Shepard gave her, but she didn't look at him, applying the medi-gel to his other wound. They worked in silence for a moment, cleaning and patching the punctures before Tali sat back while Shepard rolled the man over gently and handed Tali a fresh tube of antiseptic. Her silence was slowly becoming deafening, but he grit his teeth and kept working. The wounded came first.

* * *

A few minutes later, both wounded quarians were stabilized and Tali sighed softly, gazing down at her bloody gloves where they were clasped on her lap. At first, she'd been overjoyed to see him, but now... now she felt betrayed. _Cerberus. Two years of... mourning, thinking he was dead, and he just abandoned us and now he's with... __**them?**_ Unable to bear it anymore, she found her voice, and despite the pain and anger she felt, she sounded more heartbroken than outraged as her voice trembled. "Two years without so much as a word... and now you're with Cerberus?"

He'd been trying to find the right words while he wiped his own bloody gloves off with antiseptic from Ela's medkit and was reaching to clean Tali's wound when her voice stopped him in his tracks and he gazed up at her, finding her staring down at her lap. The right words had always seemed to flow so easily, but he was still at a loss. Sighing, he shook his head and gently wiped the sliver of Tali's bloody lavender skin that was bared by the cut in her suit. "Tali, I woke up twelve hours ago on a table in a Cerberus medical ward." He could see her head rise and feel her eyes on him, but he kept working, gently cleaning her cut and wiping away the blood. "My last memory before that was..." He couldn't help but swallow and shudder at the memory of gasping for breath, feeling the immense pressure on the back of his eyes as his suit decompressed, the spasms of his diaphragm. Shaking his head, he inhaled deeply, feeling the air pouring easily into his lungs. "I died over Alchera, gasping for breath. And from what I can gather, I nearly burned up entering the atmosphere."

Tali had never seen him so distressed, so shaken, even after Kaidan's death or when a geth sniper's round punched through Liara's shields and left a violet line of blood across her cheek. Her hand had found its way to his arm of its own accord and squeezed gently while he spoke before he shook his head and finished his thought. A jolt ran through her body and she blinked while her mouth fell open behind her visor. _..What? That's impossible!_

"You're telling me," he murmured while he coated her gash with a thin line of medi-gel and spread it over her skin with a fingertip. Tali hadn't even been aware that she'd voiced her thought and she stared at him for a long moment, stunned into silence. While he tore a suit patch into shape, she just shook her head slowly and took a moment to gaze at the odd patchwork of scars on his cheek that were glowing faintly in the dim light of the loading bay. The memory of what he'd done to that heavy mech returned to her suddenly, and she shook her head slowly.

"Keelah... so Cerberus... what did they do to you, Shepard?"

Tali's whispering voice was so hesitant, so worried, that he paused in his application of the patch to her leg and gazed up at her to give her a soft, warm smile to calm her nerves. "I'm okay, Tali. They just... stuck a lot of tech in me." He chuckled quietly and turned back to his work, smoothing the self-sealing patch over her rupture. "Heh. I guess you probably noticed that already." His heart felt heavy at the revelation, which was a reminder of another Spectre that had extensive cybernetic implants.

Tali nodded and gazed over at the fallen mech, with its arms and head ripped off. "I noticed." She turned back to him when she felt his hands sliding into hers, squeezing gently, and she gazed down at them, tears brimming in her eyes. "So you've been..."

"Dead."

She could feel the slight tremble in his hands when he said the word and her eyes squeezed shut while she shook her head slowly. "Oh, keelah... I don't know what to... I mean... _keelah_."

"My thoughts exactly," he murmured, rubbing his thumbs lightly across the backs of her hands despite the blood that coated their gloves. "Gods, I woke up to the facility under attack by mechs, met up with Jacob and then Miranda over there, got on a shuttle, and they told me two years had passed while they rebuilt me. And that they were Cerberus." His voice hissed the word again and Tali noticed, lifting her head to gaze at his haunted blue eyes while they found her own. "It's been like some sort of nightmare, Tali, until a few minutes ago." He managed a slight smile and squeezed her hands gently. "Now it's still a nightmare, but at least there's a friendly face in it. Visor. Whatever."

She finally laughed softly and shook her head, slipping a hand from his to pluck another antiseptic wipe from the medkit, rubbing it over their hands to clean off the blood. A thought occurred to her, one that lifted her spirits and brought faint butterflies to her stomach. "Maybe it'll end now... I can take you with me back to the fleet, and... Veetor!" She tensed suddenly and turned toward the building at the back of the loading bay, trying to rise, but that effort was cut short by a wave of pain that ran down her spine and made her nearly collapse until Shepard caught her, pulling her in to lean against him.

"Whoa, hey... that crate hit you pretty hard. Hold still for a minute." He pulled up his omni-tool and scanned her, his brow furrowing with concern while they both examined the readouts. "Hm... bruised spine?"

Tali pulled up her own omni-tool and copied the readouts so she could read them in Khelish, nodding. "And a cracked vertebrae. I'll be okay after some minor surgery on the Rayya. But we need to get to Veetor, Shepard. Help me up." She shut off her omni-tool and gazed up at him expectantly, but he gave her that tilt of his head that always made her smile with its resemblance to quarian body language. "Veetor's why I'm here. He's on his pilgrimage, but we hadn't heard from him in a while, so the Admiralty sent us to check on him. But we found the colony... keelah, where _is_ everyone, anyway?"

Shepard shook his head and stood, leaning down to gently scoop her up into his arms. She couldn't help but giggle quietly, a sound that earned her a brief smile while he carried her toward the building. "That's why I'm here, Tali. The Illusive Man – Cerberus' leader – asked me to investigate a series of disappearing human colonies, and this was the latest." He shook his head and growled quietly. "Perfect bait for his little trap, but I told him that if I don't find anything, those two will be going home alone." He'd ascended the steps to the prefab while he talked, and he knelt down in front of the door so she could reach the locking mechanism.

She activated her omni-tool and worked on it, frowning at both his words and the complexity of the lock. "So if you find something... you're not seriously considering working with them, are you?"

He sighed quietly and tilted his head to pop his stiff neck. "I'd rather kill them all. But... _if_ what he says is true, _and_ the Council and the Alliance haven't been doing anything about it... I don't know, Tali. His theory is that something working with the Reapers is behind it, and you know I can't ignore that if it's true." She gazed up at him while he shook his head slowly with another sigh. She'd seen that weight on his shoulders before, after the Normandy had been grounded on the Citadel, and she paused her hacking to reach up and gently cup his cheek with her hand.

"I trust you, Shepard. I _don't_ trust Cerberus, especially after they attacked one of our ships, but I trust _you._ Follow your heart. Cardiovascular regulator device. Whatever it is now." Her eyes glimmered beneath her mask, and her attempt to cheer him up was rewarded by a quiet laugh and a curl of his lips that was part grin and part smirk.

"Okay. Let's help your friend. He's our only lead, but if he doesn't know anything, I'll take you back to the Flotilla. I'm sure I could catch a ride with some impressionable young girl on her way to the Citadel for pilgrimage and teach her how to kill geth on the way." He winked, earning a smirk and a laugh while she shook her head and went back to hacking the door.

"_Bosh'tet._ I'm the only impressionable quarian girl you get to corrupt with your silly human sayings and... there."

The door hissed open to reveal a room dimly lit by the glow of a panel of monitors, and Shepard rose from his crouch to carry Tali inside toward the quarian who was working frantically at the consoles.

* * *

Five minutes later, Miranda and Jacob walked out of the prefab, shaking their heads at the images that were replaying on their omni-tools while Shepard and Tali tried to comfort Veetor as he blubbered and buried his head in his hands. "Poor kid," Jacob murmured, earning a sidelong glance from his superior. Since meeting Shepard, her lieutenant had practically turned into the man's biggest fan. Or so it seemed to the consummate professional.

"I can't believe Shepard's just going to send him back to the Migrant Fleet. Our... people... would be able to extract more information from him than just this omni-tool data."

"I think you mean 'interrogators'." Shepard's voice was cold behind her and they turned to see him staring at Miranda with cold eyes and folded arms. "Spare me your protests and go get the shuttle prepped."

Miranda, to her credit, managed to bite her tongue at his first remark but raised her brows in surprise at the second. Despite the information they'd found implicating the Collectors, she hadn't really expected him to return with them. "I take it that means you're coming back with us?"

He shook his head and walked up beside her, setting his hands on the railing and leaning against it with a tired sigh. "Not quite. I'm taking the quarians back to the Migrant Fleet in their shuttle, and you two are tagging along with me in yours." He could practically feel the imminent protest from Miranda, but he chuckled softly instead of giving her a glare. "I'll need a ride back to the station after I've dropped them off." Miranda's mouth opened to speak, but he headed her off again. "I'm not sending my wounded friend off alone when most of her squad is dead, two of them are unconscious, and Veetor is so... compromised. You two can hang back from the fleet while I make sure they're taken care of, and we'll only lose a day at most." He turned and arched a brow at her while she frowned slightly. "It's either that, or we part ways right here."

Jacob nudged Miranda's side and nodded at her, and she laughed softly, running a hand back through her hair. "All right, Commander. Half a day and I've already learned arguing with you is pointless. Besides, I can't say I'm really surprised." She smiled faintly at the sight of his brow arching inquisitively. "One of the main goals of the Lazarus Project was to bring you back exactly as you were, after all, and so far it seems to have worked. I'm sure I'd be on the receiving end of a long stare from the Illusive Man if you weren't worried about your old squad member."

"Perceptive of you." He chuckled dryly and gestured for them to get going, turning to head back toward Tali and Veetor. Miranda was a pain in the ass, but at least she learned quickly.

* * *

He'd tried to insist that he was perfectly capable of bringing their shuttle in to the loading bay by himself, but Tali had ended that argument with one question: _"Do you know how to read Khelish?"_ He could tell she was smirking at him when he'd grumbled out his 'No', and so they'd turned their attention to Veetor, who'd calmed substantially with a dose of a mild sedative and the warm reassurances of Tali. He walked alongside Shepard back through the empty colony while Tali smiled beneath her visor up at the human who was once more carrying her in his arms. She hadn't told him that the shuttle was perfectly capable of outputting in English, Asari, Turian, or a dozen other languages, and she didn't regret the deception for an instant while Shepard smiled down at her.

"So you're sure I'm me, then? Not some zombie with Commander Shepard's memories?"

Tali shook her head, her smile never leaving her face. "I'm sure. The way you move, those silly laughs when you're fighting, your eyes, the way you held my hands. It's you."

He laughed, a sound that made her heart soar, and she leaned her head into his chest with a beaming smile up at him while he gave her a grin. He hadn't really been worried about it, not after spending just a few minutes with her, but it was good to hear her voice the reasons. "Good to see I left an impression. I can live with the tech, I guess, but I hope I can get rid of these scars." He descended a set of stairs gently, careful not to jostle her despite the painkillers she'd taken that soothed the ache in her back and thigh.

"Oh, I don't know," she teased. "I've heard krogan women have a thing for scars."

"Very funny." He smirked and glanced back at Veetor, who was still following, humming a soft tune beneath his visor, and the sound reassured him that the young quarian was doing all right. "I have rules: never date a woman who outweighs you, or who can eat you in under ten bites. Krogan don't fit either of those criteria."

Tali giggled, but felt her cheeks warming beneath the visor while she gazed up at him. "So no krogan, got it. What about hanar or volus?"

"Ah, those break other rules. Never date a woman who doesn't have lips, and never date a woman who would explode in your homeworld's atmospheric pressure." He nodded seriously, but Tali laughed again.

"You're running out of options, Commander. What about vorcha, batarians, or turians?"

"Hmm." He tilted his head in mock consideration while he carried her into a prefab with blinking lights on the fritz. "The teeth on the first two make me think that they could break rule number two, and turians are awfully... bony." He heard Veetor laugh quietly behind them and gave Tali a smile while she did the same. "Veetor, how sharp are quarian teeth?"

Veetor's head turned side to side and he bounced on his toes for a moment before he shrugged and laughed softly again. "Well, um... we were omnivores before the Fleet, so they're... well, half sharp and half dull. What about yours?"

Tali was beaming at the way Shepard had managed to engage him in conversation, and he stopped to turn and face Veetor, giving him a smile before he opened his mouth to show off his teeth.

"Oh, um... a lot like yours, then. But our front teeth are a bit sharper, and those two pointy ones aren't as pointy as ours." Veetor nodded and bounced again on his toes while Shepard smiled and nodded, turning around to keep moving.

"Interesting... thank you, Veetor."

Tali was still grinning, but her fingers had begun to slowly wriggle together where they were clasped over her waist. "Does that break rule number two?"

Shepard 'hmm'ed and tilted his head thoughtfully while he carried her out of the prefab, ignoring Tali's nearly-stifled giggle. "Almost, but no, since you're omnivores-turned-vegetarians. And you certainly don't outweigh me, and you don't feel bony." His fingers squeezed lightly where they were curled against her thigh, and Tali jumped slightly, blushing and smirking up at him.

"_Bosh'tet._"

"I try." He gave her an innocent smile while they approached the quarian shuttle. "Judging by the thinness of your suits, I'd say you wouldn't explode in standard Earth atmosphere, but I have no idea if you have lips."

Tali laughed and swatted his chest with a palm lightly, though the armor just made a soft thumping sound. "We have lips, and they're a lot like yours and asari's. Except without that silly paint your women put on them."

"If you're jealous, you could always paint some lips over your vocal emitter." It was his turn to tease, and he could tell she was smirking up at him, though no more swats struck his chest as they reached the shuttle and she tapped the entry code.

"I was jealous on Bekenstein when I couldn't go swimming, but that's about it."

He stepped up into the shuttle and carried her to the cockpit with a smile. "I couldn't swim, either. But I had a lot of fun teaching you the proper use of sand." He gently set her down into the pilot's seat, tilting his head slightly. He could swear she looked disappointed when he sat her down, but the glimmer in her eyes quickly returned and he turned back to see Veetor sitting and looking at the safety straps with some confusion.

"That _was_ fun," Tali called as he moved to straighten out the straps for Veetor.

* * *

Five minutes later, they were landed in the loading bay while Tali sighed and slowly stretched her back out after reclining her seat. She could still feel the ache, but the painkillers were living up to their name. Behind her, Veetor snored softly, and she sighed quietly, shaking her head. First he had to witness that horrible attack, and now he'd be sharing a cabin with the bodies of some of his people and two wounded. She'd wanted to blame herself, but Shepard had picked up on it instantly and reminded her that Prazza and his squad chose to disobey. And with him there, with her, she didn't want to believe otherwise. So instead, she'd smiled and let him lift her up into his arms to begin the trip back to the shuttle.

Turning her head, she gazed out the cockpit window, watching him wrap a body in one of the bedsheets he'd procured from the colony before he lifted it gently and carried it toward the shuttle. She could tell he was tired, aching, and still carrying the weight of Cerberus and the Collectors, but he'd still insisted on taking care of their dead and wounded himself, leaving his 'squad' on their shuttle. She couldn't help but smile softly as he gently laid the body beside the others while the two wounded were were carefully strapped onto the two benches. Infection had begun to set in for Soltor'Dival, but he was heavily dosed with antibiotics and they'd be back to the fleet before it got too serious. She hoped.

Despite the losses, the wounded, Veetor's mental trauma, the loss of the colony, Cerberus, and the Collectors, she couldn't help but smile. Shepard was alive, and she remembered vividly the way he'd leaped over the mech to hold her, to take her hands. The way he smiled and teased with her, his worry over her wounds. Maybe she was being silly, like she had been two years ago, but... His hands coming down gently on her shoulders shook her out of her reverie, and she gazed up at him while he gave her a soft, weary smile. "Everyone's aboard."

Tali swallowed and nodded, suddenly brought back to reality. He'd found the evidence they were looking for, and now he'd be returning to... Cerberus. It took her a moment to find her voice while she reached up to take his hands in hers. "So... I guess this is goodbye, then?"

"Hm?" He gave her that curious head tilt before he winced and chuckled, shaking his head. "Oh, sorry. I told them I was going to take you back to the fleet. But... yeah." He sighed and moved to drop heavily into the copilot's seat, running a hand through his hair. God, he needed a shower. He shook his head and shrugged helplessly, and she could see the weight on them again. "They promised a ship and resources. I'll stop by the Citadel and speak to Anderson when I can, but if he can't help, then..." He let the thought trail off and frowned.

Tali nodded and reached across to take his hand in hers, which made him smile softly. She was nearly ecstatic to learn he was going to be spending more time with her, though it was far less than she'd hoped for. "I understand, Shepard. You can't turn your back on your people. You're part quarian, after all." That gentle tease made his smile widen a bit more, and he nodded slowly.

"Well... let's get you to the fleet. Hopefully they'll accept the dead zombie Spectre, and the Admiralty might be interested to hear about my thoughts regarding Cerberus." He glanced back to make sure his helmet was still there before he strapped himself into the copilot's seat and yawned heavily.

Tali blinked at his mention of the Admiralty, and as she started the engines, she suddenly found herself imagining nightmare scenarios where Shepard and her father were about to come to blows. She couldn't suppress a giggle, though, at the thought of walking in to brief the Admiralty to see them staring in horror at the sight of a five-fingered and a three-fingered hand entwined.

"What's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing..."


	9. Detour

**Author's note:**

_A long one, and it's heavy with dialogue. Most of it just flowed out in one long session, and when I went back through it, I didn't find much I wanted to trim. Bullets and explosions are coming soon. Promise. After the next chapter's introduction of the Normandy, it's off to find Archangel.  
_

* * *

"Look what I found!" Shepard announced cheerfully while Tali yawned and blinked the sleep from her eyes, looking over at him. He looked entirely too pleased with himself. Clearly, he was going to show her something she wasn't going to like. But he was just sitting there, smiling, holding her water bottle up for her, though she knew that wasn't what he was talking about. Eying him warily, she extended her straw and slid it through the bottle's seal, taking a long sip while she looked around, trying to figure out what he was...

"...Oh. I... I guess I was wrong. Heh. Silly me." She blushed despite her smile while she gazed at the readouts on the copilot's console, which looked like English and were definitely not Khelish.

_Damn it, he was always as devious as Wrex._

"Uh huh." He smiled and turned back to the console, tapping a few keys. "We're five minutes from the fleet, but I've reactivated the transponder and have the decon protocol prepped. Ela's still stable, but Soltor's infection is worse. I gave him another dose of antibiotics, and he's stable, but his fever is up to forty-three." He reached down and picked up his helmet, giving it a distasteful look.

Tali gazed back at the still-sleeping Veetor and the two wounded quarians. Soltor's temperature was four degrees above normal, but it could have been a lot worse. He'd be in the Rayya's medical ward in ten minutes. Nodding in satisfaction, she turned to Shepard and gave him a wry smile. "You still don't like helmets? Soft human."

He shot her a smirk and donned the helmet, fastening the seals. "This 'soft' human has been through the toughest training the Alliance has to offer, with fifty pounds of weapons and armor on his back the whole time. On very little sleep, I might add." He tapped on the console and activated the decontamination routine with a hiss of rushing air and fine aerosol sprays of disinfectants. "I bet you couldn't do that, even with nothing but that skintight suit of yours."

Tali blushed at the mention of her suit's tightness, though she was also secretly proud of its flattering fit... triply so now that _he'd_ mentioned it. But still. "Noveria. Feros. Virmire. Ilos. The Citadel. What were you saying about 'tough military training'?" She grinned to herself while she adjusted their heading toward the center of the fleet where the liveships would be.

"They don't count. You did those with Wrex."

She laughed and shook her head, tapping away at her console. "Then you can't count them, either. And..." She turned her head toward him, meeting his gaze. "..Do you have something to say about my suit, Commander?" The mischievous tone that slipped into her voice was impossible to miss, and Shepard's cheeks warmed subtly.

_"Shuttle Helestya, this is Control. State destination and confirm identity."_

Tali smirked and shook her head while Shepard chuckled, saved by the interruption. She keyed the comm. "This is Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Rayya, requesting permission to dock with the Rayya."

* * *

"Why are you so worried, Rael?" Shala glanced over at the man walking beside her as they passed through the dim corridors of the Rayya, nearing the airlock where the Helestya was docking. The crates and various supplies that lined the corridors and were clinging to the walls under cargo netting were just background to the quarians who had spent their entire lives in conditions most species would consider cramped. "Tali has always had fine judgment, and she would only bring a human back if she believed he had something important to tell us."

Rael sighed and shook his head as they rounded a bend, stepping through a door that hissed open at their approach. "I know, but this isn't the first mission she's returned from wounded, bearing the bodies of some of her team. And she hasn't been the same since her Pilgrimage." His concerns about why that was were unvoiced, but Shala knew the source of them and she could only sigh. Tali wasn't the same effervescent soul she'd been as a girl, but she was diligent, brave, and kind: exactly the kind of quarian she always imagined Rael would want his daughter to be. But still he was troubled, and she had to admit that she was as well.

"I'm sure Han'Gerrel would not object to giving her time off to recover, though he might have to make it an order. She fusses over the Neema's engines like you fuss over whatever project you've been obsessing over, Rael." Shala chided him gently, but he only shrugged. He'd been noticeably tight-lipped about it. "You should both take a few days off and spend some time together."

Rael nodded and led her into the final corridor before the airlock. "I've... considered that. But my work is at a-"

"-critical stage, yes, I know. It always is. But it can wait a few days, Rael. Making your daughter smile is worth a little sacrifice." Shala patted his shoulder, and he smiled beneath his visor as they stepped out of the way of a medical team bearing the wounded quickly toward the medical ward.

"We'll see." He turned to the captain, who nodded crisply.

"Admirals. The wounded are on their way to medical, and Tali said she'd be out in a moment."

Rael returned the nod and glanced at the airlock. "Wounded but running post-flight diagnostics on the shuttle, no doubt." He smiled and chuckled, leaning against the bulkhead beside Shala while the captain gestured his remaining two marines to return to their posts.

"I wonder where she acquired that stubbornness. Any ideas, Rael?" Shala grinned over at him, but he was staring at the airlock, eyes wide behind his visor.

"Commander Shepard, requesting permission to come aboard." Shala's entire body tensed at the words and turned to see the human standing at the threshold of the airlock, armored in charcoal grey and a red stripe, the N7 logo distinctive on his chest. But that wasn't what had shocked Rael, apparently, as Tali glanced between the two admirals from her position cradled in his arms, fingers entwined nervously atop her waist.

There was silence between them all for a long moment before Kar'Danna cleared his throat and nodded to Shepard. "Permission granted, Commander. I, ah, apologize, but we heard you were..."

"Dead? I was. It's... a long story." He shifted uncomfortably at the stares he and Tali were receiving, and she shot him a nervous glance.

"Um, Shepard, this is Captain Kar'Danna vas Rayya, Admiral Shala'Raan vas Tonbay, and Admiral Rael'Zorah vas Alarei." She gestured to each of them with a hand before it quickly returned to the other upon her waist. _Oh, keelah, I didn't know __**they **__would be here. Father looks like he's going to explode._ She gave Shepard another glance, but he was nodding to each of them in turn while he stepped out of the airlock and onto the deck of the Rayya.

"Captain, Admirals. Thank you for allowing me aboard." _Oh, you've got to be kidding. My first visit to the fleet, and the first thing I do is meet Tali's aunt and father with her in my arms._ He wanted to bury his face into his palm, but the helmet made that impossible, so he bowed his head slightly to the admirals instead. The captain took the opportunity to slip away, having no interest in getting involved with whatever was going on between the four of them.

"Commander Shepard, I..." Shala shook her head slowly and caught Tali's eyes. "Are you _certain_ of this, Tali?" Shala felt like an idiot when she blurted out the words, but the poor woman was too surprised to be diplomatic.

Tali nodded. "I'm sure, Aunt Shala, and I have a long list of reasons." She gazed up at Shepard and blushed, meeting his gaze before they both looked over to her father, who was still silent, still gazing at them both intently with narrowed eyes.

"Well, we should get Tali to medical, if you'll show me the way, Admirals." Shepard gave Tali a pointed glance. "And no arguing, Miss Zorah, or the admirals will make it an order. Right?" He gazed up at Rael, who looked as if he _might_ not be scowling.

"Indeed, Commander." He extended a hand to gesture them onward and fell in step between Shepard and Shala, giving the commander a long stare. "I'm sure we can find another gurney if you get tired of carrying her."

Shepard chuckled quietly and shook his head. "Not necessary, Admiral. Part of the long story is that I ended up with some... upgrades." He frowned beneath his helmet and looked over at Rael. "To be honest, I was hoping you could spare a physician to give me an examination to see just what kind of tech got stuck in me while they put me back together."

Rael glanced between Shepard and Tali, stepping forward to hold up a hand to halt the group. "Shepard, I get the feeling there's something you have to say that I'm not going to like, and I prefer to hear unpleasant news before the good." Tali's nervously wriggling fingers didn't go unnoticed, and her father folded his arms across his chest with a frown. Between the mystery of Shepard's revival and the feelings he knew his daughter had for the commander before his death, he braced himself for truly unpleasant news while Shala stepped up beside him.

Shepard glanced down at Tali, who nodded up at him. Exhaling a quiet sigh, he met Shala and then Rael's eyes, choosing his words carefully. "I woke up yesterday in a medical bay that was under attack by hacked mechs. My last memories before that... well, I was struggling to contain my hardsuit ruptures as the Normandy blew apart around me." Tali felt him shudder slightly and reached up to pat his arm, despite the glare that earned her from her father. "When I managed to escape with two of the people responsible for reconstructing me, they told me the facility was run by Cerberus."

Shala's gasp was quiet but audible, and both Shepard and Tali watched as Rael tensed and took a half step back, eyes narrowing. "You're telling me that it was _Cerberus_ that rebuilt you? And that they implanted you with tech to do it?" His voice came out in a hiss, and before Shepard could answer, he turned and yelled for the two marines that were on post nearby. "Guards, get over here and restrain the human! Shepard, put my daughter down, **now**!"

The marines rushed over, weapons at the ready, but Tali twisted in the arms that cradled her, ignoring the pain in her back, and yelled loud enough at her father to make Shepard stop where he'd been slowly kneeling to set her down. "Don't you dare, you _bosh'tet!" _Her sudden ferocity made Rael blink, and the marines paused as Shala held up a hand to stop them.

"Tali, it's okay-"

"No, it's not!" She interrupted Shepard with a hiss, glaring at her father and pointing a quivering finger at him. "If it wasn't for him, I'd be _dead_ on that colony, and my entire squad with me! He jumped in front of a YMIR mech to shield me from its fire before he killed it, destroyed another, and helped me patch up our wounded!"

"That hardly-"

Tali interrupted her father as if he hadn't even opened his mouth while Shala stared at Shepard with curious eyes. "He wouldn't let Cerberus take Veetor, helped me calm him down, brought our dead to the shuttle, and refused to let me return practically by myself while I was wounded! You owe him your daughter's life, and the lives of the three others that returned! So don't you _dare_ lay a hand on him!"

Rael and Shala could only stare at her, but each had different thoughts running through their minds while they looked at the young woman whose chest heaved with anger and whose eyes were practically burning a hole into her father's visor. After a moment, Shala waved the marines off, and they were all too happy to jog away with stunned glances over their shoulders at the woman who could get away with yelling at an admiral. Shepard was smiling, thankful for once to be wearing a helmet, as it saved him from glares while he gazed down at Tali, who broke the silence with a nervous chuckle. "Okay. Well. That's settled. Um..." She peered up at Shepard as if asking for his help, and he rose with a nearly-stifled laugh.

"Good thing I didn't let you handle the debriefings with the Council." Tali swatted his arm lightly, but he was gazing over at Rael. "Believe me, Admiral, I understand. Waking up to find out you have Cerberus tech implanted in you is... well, it's not a pleasant discovery. Especially when they were responsible for the massacre of your entire unit and the death of a good man, one of our own admirals." Shala and Tali exchanged a gaze, and the younger woman blinked at the smile she saw in her aunt's eyes. That was a surprise. Rael reluctantly gestured for Shepard to continue and fell in step beside him again while the human continued. "I met with their leader, who calls himself the 'Illusive Man'. He told me human colonies were disappearing and thinks it's connected to the Rea... well, to what happened two years ago."

Shepard briefed the admirals while they walked, but Shala's eyes spent more time on Tali, watching as the young woman smiled up at the human who carried her so gently.

* * *

Shepard had asked Rael to accompany him while he was examined, hoping his technical expertise and natural skepticism would make it that much harder to overlook something. And to allow the admiral to keep an eye on him, though the battle-hardened soldier found himself dreading the possibility of a father's interrogation, despite the fact there was nothing to really be interrogated about. Tali had appeared concerned, but Shepard had simply given her a smile before they departed, leaving her lying on her stomach on the medical bed while Shala stood off to the side, out of the way of the physician that set up the sterile field and unsealed the back of her suit to repair the fracture in her vertebrae. The medical bay was as white and sterile as any other of its kind, which stood in stark contrast to the dim corridors of the Rayya that felt comfortable and familiar despite their plain and utilitarian brown.

"Keelah, child, what hit you?" Shala breathed when she saw the dark purple bruise on Tali's lower back. It was no suit puncture, but it certainly looked ugly and deep.

Tali just laughed softly and adjusted her head atop her folded arms, gazing over at her aunt with a smile. "A rocket-propelled crate. But I'm fine, Aunt Shala. I would have been shredded by the mech that fired the rocket if Shepard hadn't distracted it." She shivered at the cool air upon her tender skin, but her smile widened at the sensations of feeling something other than the gentle pressure and neutral temperature of her suit. Until she was pricked with a needle, of course.

Shala chuckled when Tali yelped and stepped over to rub her shoulder, her voice teasing. "You've taken bullets, claws, even a flying crate, and you're whimpering over a pinprick? Hero of the Citadel, indeed." Tali felt her lower back going numb and tried to suppress the anxious twitching that came from being exposed to the air with her flesh ready to be cut into. Shala slipped a hand into hers, and her niece squeezed it gratefully. "So how did he stop the mech? I've seen the specifications on those: they're immense!"

"He, um... ripped its arms and head off."

Shala laughed and shook her head. "I'm not _that_ gullible, Tali'Zorah, but I'm sure the commander wouldn't complain about your romanticized version of events."

Tali blushed fiercely beneath her visor, too distracted and anesthetized to feel the scalpel cutting her skin while her silently smiling surgeon worked. "I'm not 'romanticizing' anything, Shala. Cybernetics and biotics, remember?" She turned her head toward the door Shepard and her father had vanished behind, biting her lip. "I hope father isn't doing anything stupid."

Shala gave Tali's hand another squeeze, trying not to wince at the sight of Tali's blood on the surgeon's gloves while her spine was tended to with medi-gel. "I'm sure he's behaving himself. I believe you actually scared him, though he might give the commander suspicious gazes for reasons unrelated to Cerberus."

_Scared? Father?_ Tali grinned at the thought, but felt her cheeks warming again when Shala's words sank in. "He... I don't know what you mean," Tali mumbled, staring at a spot of dried blood on the wrist of her glove while Shala laughed softly. "Oh! I almost forgot... Shala, can you take this to Shepard?" Tali grunted quietly while she reached down and tugged something out of a waist pocket, holding it up for her aunt.

Shala raised a brow and took the flat object, turning it over in her fingers. "A Savant? Keelah, child, this is expensive!"

Tali smiled and laid her head back down, nodding. "He bought them for us on Noveria, and then got us even newer models after the Citadel. Rich _bosh'tet._"

Shala chuckled and shook her head, slipping her hand from Tali's. "I'm sure he'll appreciate it. I'll be back in a moment."

Tali hummed quietly to herself as Shala walked off, shivering again at the cool air on her back while she smiled at the memory of her protests at being given such an expensive gift.

* * *

"At least no one accused me of dooming the galaxy to an invasion of insects or called my methods of destruction unsubtle." Shepard flashed Tali a wry smile as they walked out of the briefing room, supporting her with an arm around her waist. Between laser fusion of the cracked bone and a thorough application of medi-gel, her spine was mostly healed, though her legs were still a bit tingly while the swelling slowly subsided. The debriefing of the mission had been mercifully short, and her omni-tool recordings, along with Shepard's, had absolved her of any fault, but his briefing on Cerberus and the discussion of the Collector information had left him with a dry throat and a minor headache. Fortunately, the admirals seemed to understand his reasons for choosing to work with Cerberus, especially given the information on the Collectors, though Rael's gaze never seemed particularly friendly and Daro'Xen looked as if she wanted to dissect him.

Tali smiled up at him and lightly bumped his hip with hers, happy to be on her feet and alone with him again. "No, but I think Admiral Gerrel's now one of your biggest fans."

"Your father doesn't seem to be, even after your own physicians cleared me of having a self-destruct device or some sort of mind-control chip." Shepard frowned and took a seat on a stack of crates, leaning back against the bulkhead with a sigh while he tried to crane his neck far enough to pop it, but he was foiled by the stiff neckguard and bulky helmet.

"He's... just... um..." Tali sat beside him and tried to force her hands to stop writhing by sticking them beneath her thighs.

"Yeah, I get it. Human. Cerberus affiliations. Pilgrimage captain. Devilishly handsome. Bad combination in the eyes of a protective father." Shepard closed his eyes and smiled after he observed Tali tensing at the mention of his looks. _Thought so._

"Well, three out of four, but yes." Tali smiled despite her blush and found her legs were kicking lightly. Damn it! She forced her heels back into the side of the crate, wondering if there was no end to her nervous habits.

"That hurts, Tali."

"Wh-what? How do you know I... maybe I meant you're... not human. Yes, that's it. You're krogan, not human."

"Now that _really_ hurts." He laughed and lightly poked her side, making her squirm and turn to glare at him, but he could tell by the way her shoulders rose slightly and her head tilted that she was smiling. They gazed at each other for a long moment in silence before he turned and stared out the thick window with a quiet sigh. "I probably should call the shuttle."

"Wait!" Tali practically yelped as her hand shot out from under her leg to grab his wrist, and she blushed as soon as she did though she didn't let go, instead slipping her hand into his to entwine their fingers. "I... don't go yet." _Oh, keelah, this really isn't the best time to pour your heart out. He needs to focus, needs to worry about nothing but stopping the Collectors and staying a step ahead of Cerberus, and-_

He stared down at their gloved hands and sighed quietly. The last thing he wanted to do was leave, to replace her company with that of a couple of Cerberus operatives that he wouldn't trust with even a fork in their hands at his back. His last day aboard the Normandy had been filled with mental wrestling over the feelings he had for the young mechanic and the asari archaeologist, and it had only been as he was making his way to the cockpit with the ship disintegrating around him that he realized his worries had been focused only on Tali making it off the ship. He remembered how scared he'd been when he saw her slumped against those steps on Freedom's Progress with that small flash of lavender skin lined with blood, how happy he'd been when he was carrying her to the shuttle.

Tali's frantic thoughts were interrupted by his hand escaping from hers and his arms slipping around her to draw her in against him in a tight embrace. She melted against him with a deep sigh, laying her head against his and squeezing him tight enough to make his armor creak quietly. They both heard someone pass by, but didn't bother to look, and Shepard broke the silence with a quiet, wry murmur. "If your father comes out and sees us like this, he'll shoot me."

She couldn't help but giggle, but she didn't move an inch, sighing contentedly in his arms. "That's what shields are for."

"I don't feel very reassured by that, but for some reason, I can't bring myself to feel worried." He smiled and stroked her back slowly, sighing quietly as well. "So, Shala told me my new toy came from you. Does this mean that I have to be worried about being hacked by a quarian instead of terrorists?"

"Mmm... maybe. It _was_ my omni-tool, after all. I _may_ have set up virtually unbreakable, matching encryption keys on yours and mine while you were sleeping on the shuttle." She grinned and sighed again at the feeling of his palms caressing her back, laying her head comfortably on his shoulder despite the helmet and the armor. "So it's _possible_ that you might receive messages from me without having to rely on a private extranet account. Messages that Cerberus couldn't trace."

"I knew there was a reason I brought you along two years ago."

"My skintight suit?" The words slipped easily out of her mouth, but she blushed as soon as they left, burying her visor against his shoulder while he laughed and wrapped his arms back around her. _Oh, keelah, me and my big m-_

"Well, no, but your suit _does _look a lot nicer this time around." He grinned beneath his helmet, ignoring the part of him that argued flirting with a girl who had to live in a suit aboard a sterile, insular flotilla might not be the best idea, especially when he'd be working with a human-centric terrorist organization.

Tali's blush didn't abate, though her lips spread wide and she giggled, squeezing him a little tighter in her arms. "Maybe you should come find me when you get a new ship, then."

"I like that idea, even if your father would send the entire fleet after me." They shared a quiet laugh, but his smile faded while he gazed down at the deck. "I'd love nothing more than to have you with me, but... Cerberus." He sighed as the moment of happiness faded into a sense of gloom and dread.

Tali slipped back and gazed up at him, reaching a gloved hand up to lay against the side of his helmet while she shook her head. "I don't care. I'd come with you anyways."

He blinked and found her eyes with his, reaching up to lay his hand on hers. "Tali, that's not... besides, the fleet-"

"-can get along just fine without me." She gave him a reassuring smile, knowing he could pick up on it. "I have another mission to complete, an important one, but after that... I want to come with you. Maybe we can find Garrus and Wrex and Ash... and Liara." She spoke the last name hesitantly, but smiled when he didn't flinch at the mention of it.

"Heh. Replace some of the Cerberus with the old entourage? Can't say I dislike that idea." He smiled and took her hands in his, rubbing his thumbs along them slowly while he gazed down at them. "All right. When I figure out what I'll be up to, I'll let you know. I'll try to track down the others, and stop on the Citadel to see Anderson." His smile faded into a grimace when another name popped into his head. "And my mother... I don't know what I'm going to _say_ to her. I don't even know where she is."

"She's the captain of the Orizaba." She smiled at the way his face brightened at the news, squeezing his hands in hers. "I... well, we exchanged a few messages. I told her about some of our missions. I even sent her that recording of you playing on the Mako. Well, an edited version." _Keelah! How could I have forgotten?_ She sighed, though, remembering she was confined to the Rayya for the next two days while she recovered, and Kal was off on a mission and couldn't help her. _Well, I'll bring it when I join him. _She smiled at that thought, unaware that he was staring at her curiously while her eyes shifted expressions a few times.

"Thanks... everything okay? Your eyes went a little crazier than usual for a moment there." He gave her a playful wink and she smirked, shoving him lightly with her shoulder.

"_Bosh'tet._ No, I was just remembering that I have a gift for you on the Neema, but... it'll have to wait until I see you again."

"You already gave me a gift. I'm all set." He wrapped his arms around her again while she sighed contentedly and leaned in against him once more.

"Yes, but it's been two years. You get two gifts. Right? Two birthdays? Isn't that how it works?"

"I'm not sure if dead people have birthdays, honestly. Or zombies." He knew they'd all watched at least one zombie movie on the Normandy, and her giggle reassured him.

"You're not a zombie. You're a _bosh'tet_. There's a difference."

"Ahhh. Well, quarian ship, quarian rules. But really, you're still alive, and I get to see you again. That's enough of a present for me." _Well, that was ch-_

"That was really fruity," Tali laughed, swatting his shoulder lightly, although her heart was soaring and her smile was warm.

" 'Cheesy', Tali. We've been over this." Tali sighed in mock exasperation and shook her head, leaning back to gaze at him. She saw his eyes lower momentarily and his head tilt down just a fraction, and she was as familiar with the meaning of that body language as he was with her own, waiting for him to voice what was on his mind. The clearing of a man's throat to their side stole their attention, though, while Tali cursed silently at the interruption. She nearly cursed aloud when she saw her father gazing down at them with arms folded across his chest, Shala standing beside him with a twinkle in her eyes. _Keelah... no, damn it, couldn't he have just left us alone?_

"Hello, father. Is the briefing over?" Tali could feel her cheeks burning and wanted to slip away from _that_ gaze, but the bold part of her that had emerged since she left on Pilgrimage decided to stop shrinking before him, and she just gazed up at him with her arms still draped around Shepard, who showed no signs of moving his own. That alone made her smile wide beneath her visor while her father glanced between them as if expecting them to wilt beneath his gaze, but when neither did, he nodded.

_I should have had the marines... bah! Tali would never speak to me again if I did that. Damned human!_ "Yes. I'd like to have a word with the commander before he departs." He gestured toward the corridor.

Tali nearly growled at him, holding a little tighter to Shepard's armor, but he nodded and slipped out of her grasp, standing. "Of course, Admiral." He fell into step beside the tense quarian while Tali's hands found each other on her lap and began writhing nervously. When they were out of earshot, Shala chuckled and took a seat beside her, patting her knee.

"Your father is not happy, but he knows whose side you'd take if it came to that."

"Damn right," Tali muttered, watching as the two men she loved came to a stop beside each other, gazing out at the fleet.

* * *

Before the Normandy had disintegrated around him, he'd spent the day going about his duties quietly, trying to come to terms with what was going on between Tali and himself, finding no good answers. She needed to complete her Pilgrimage, needed to rejoin the fleet, and he had his own duties, but he'd been struggling with the idea of asking if she'd be willing to return to complete the Pilgrimage and rejoin him to help investigate the Reaper threat. Logically, it made sense. With the geth having followed Sovereign, her expertise on the geth, and her skills in engineering and on the ground, she was a great addition to the team. But he got into trouble when he stopped thinking rationally, like he had since he'd first heard her voice on Freedom's Progress. And now he was about to get chewed out by her admiral father. A decade ago, he would have chuckled and just ignored the man, but instead he stood straight and braced himself for the upcoming tirade. To his surprise, Rael was silent for a long moment while they stared out at the twinkling stars and the swarm of ships that journeyed between them, but Shepard waited patiently. Whether the admiral was attempting to unsettle him or was simply gathering his thoughts, it didn't matter. He already knew what he would say.

"My daughter thinks the world of you, Shepard." Rael finally broke the silence with a surprisingly quiet voice, and equally unexpected words that left a furrow in the human's brow.

He nodded and didn't hesitate in his reply. "I think the world of her."

"Yes... I can see that. She told me a great deal about you and your team over the past two years." Rael sighed and glanced down at a faint line of dust on the edge of the window, but it didn't even occur to him to make a note to have maintenance reprimanded. "She returned to us with a broken heart over what I thought was the loss of friends, a ship, and a young girl's wide-eyed crush. But..." Rael finally turned to regard Shepard, who impressed him with the level gaze of azure eyes behind the clear visor. "It was more than that. And it still is."

Shepard looked back at Tali for a moment before he returned his eyes to Rael's. "I know. Admiral, I had the same impression that you first did during the first month of our mission." He gestured for Rael to walk with him, and they moved down the hallway slowly, side by side. "Tali impressed my from the first time I met her. She was young and perhaps a bit naïve, but she was brilliant, brave, and dedicated like no one else on the crew." Chuckling quietly, he shook his head. "My chief engineer, Adams, was amazed by her from the first day that they met, and he's the finest in the Alliance Navy. It didn't take me much longer to feel the same, but she reminded me of my little sister at first."

Rael glanced over at Shepard, noting the way his eyes drifted to the deck for a moment at the mention of his sibling. He was aware of the commander's history. Shepard looked back up and shrugged as he continued. "It was a strange crew. A krogan battlemaster who chose to fight for a cause instead of credits. A turian policeman who chose to follow a Spectre because he was sick of red tape. An asari maiden archaeologist who'd spent more time with ruins than people. But they became like family to me. Tali, though..." He stopped and folded his arms, leaning back against a bulkhead while he regarded Rael, who was listening silently. "You're familiar with my history?" Rael nodded, and Shepard gazed down the corridor at Tali, who was speaking with Shala. "I'd come to terms with it, but that mission brought a lot of it back. The crew was always there to speak with me, ease the stress, and it worked, but speaking with Tali was what truly made me smile."

Rael took a spot on the wall beside Shepard, gazing out at the stars while he listened. "I couldn't imagine a finer representative of your people than your daughter, Admiral. From the way she described you, I'd guess she inherited your sense of duty and loyalty to the fleet, but she's also the kindest, most generous soul I've ever met. I'd wake from a nightmare and she'd find me in the mess hall after her shift in engineering, and she wouldn't let me leave until I had a smile on my face again." He shook his head and laughed softly. "It never took long. Just being around her has a way of making you feel that everything is right in the galaxy, even if you've just come from a mission where you had to leave a friend behind."

Stepping off the wall, he turned to face Rael, shrugging. "Anyways. The point is, it's been thirteen... well, fifteen years since I've felt as at peace as when I'm with her. It took me a while to realize that... and to realize what she means to me. But... I also realize that I could never ask her to choose between her people and... well." He sighed and gazed down the hall at her, shaking his head slowly. "But she volunteered to join me, Cerberus and all, without the slightest idea of what I'll be doing, after her next mission is complete. And it wasn't just because of me." He could feel Rael's tension returned, but he gave the silent admiral a faint smile. "That's loyalty. Not just to me, but to your people, and to everyone else. She's as aware as I am of what the Reaper threat means to not just your people, but the galaxy as a whole. People call me a hero, but I'm not in your daughter's league, Admiral."

Rael had at first been holding his anger in check only to avoid alienating his daughter, but he'd found himself listening with rapt attention and growing pride while Shepard gave him perspective on his daughter he'd never heard before. Her engineering skill and dedication was the pride of the Neema and the teams she was part of, but little was said about her heart other than that had often been heard crying behind the drawn cloth door of her small residence to the sound of soft music. To his surprise, he found himself blinking back a tear as Shepard finished speaking while he slowly nodded his head. "I'd say she inherited more of her mother than of me, and despite my position... I cannot complain." He turned alongside Shepard to gaze down the hall at Tali, who was now looking their way with squirming fingers upon her lap. "I'm old, Shepard, and stuck in my ways. I'm a quarian, through and through, but..." He sighed and chuckled, earning a surprised glance from the human beside him. "But I see that she's more than just some old soldier who lives for the fleet and nothing else. Part of me wants to blame you for that, but after what you've said, what you've done for the galaxy, and what you've done for her, I suppose I can't fault you for anything except stealing my daughter's heart." Rael smiled ruefully and turned to meet Shepard's gaze, finding only an understanding warmth in his blue eyes. "She's not a lovestruck child. She's fully capable of making her own decisions. But I will have your word that you will not let her come to harm due to carelessness or unnecessary risk."

Shepard sighed quietly and gazed over at Tali once more. "I can swear to that, Admiral, but even if nothing would make me happier than to have her with me again, the commanding officer in me dreads the thought of having to put her in jeopardy, even if the stakes are as high as they were two years ago. I don't know how you do it."

Rael bristled for a moment before he realized Shepard's words held no accusation in them, and he sighed as well, gazing at his daughter. "Neither do I, sometimes. But you said it yourself, Shepard: Tali knows the stakes, and she shoulders her duties because it's in her nature. So others don't have to." The admiral turned back to the commander with the hint of a smile upon his lips. "Just as you do. It may be why she loves you." Rael had the satisfaction of seeing the human jolt slightly at those words but restrained his chuckle, gesturing for him to return to a waiting Tali. "Go on. I'm sure she's still worried that we'll come to blows."

Shepard took a step but stopped and turned to smile at Rael, raising a hand to his visor in salute. "Aye aye, Admiral. Keep her company while she's recuperating, or she'll try to sneak her way back to the Neema."

Rael laughed softly and returned the salute before waving him off. "Indeed. Good luck, Commander."

* * *

Tali breathed a sigh of relief when the two men dropped their arms and parted, and Shala chuckled and patted her shoulder. "I told you. Though if it was anyone other than the Hero of the Citadel, he might have found himself out the airlock."

That remark earned the admiral a smirk and a light elbow in the ribs before Shala stood and slipped away, laughing quietly. Shepard approached with raised brows and a wry smile on his face, stopping to stand in front of Tali. "Something I said?"

Three-fingered hands grabbed his and pulled him down to sit beside her while Tali smiled and leaned against his side, entwining her fingers with his. "Oh, she probably just finds you ugly, with all those digits and that strange hair on your face."

"Very funny."

Tali giggled quietly and laid her head on his shoulder. "What did you and Father talk about? Did he threaten to keel drag... keel pull..."

"Keelhaul me? No. At first, I was expecting him to yell at me and threaten to sic the dogs on me if I didn't stay away from you, but he was quite civil."

"Wow. He must be losing a step with age."

Shepard smirked at the sound of another little laugh, though he loved the sound. "He was just concerned about... us."

Tali found her heart suddenly skipping beats and she tensed against his shoulder, even if the conversation was shifting in a direction she longed to take it. "Um... 'us'? Well, there isn't... I mean, not that I wouldn't want... oh, keelah." Her voice faded from a nervous squeak into a flustered murmur, but she found her chin lifted by a gentle touch on the bottom of her mask and she saw warm eyes on her.

"Tali... I know it's been two years for you, but somehow, it doesn't feel like anything's really changed." His hand returned to hers, squeezing it gently as he laid his visor against her own. "Well, you're a bit more bold than I remember, but I can't imagine you snuggling up to Wrex the way you do with me." He grinned and held her hands a little tighter to keep them from squirming while she... yep, that was definitely a blush beneath the visor.

"...No, I can't imagine that either. Heh. I just... keelah, Shepard, you were dead for two years!" She sniffled and bowed her head, shaking it slowly. "I was never going to see you again. I was never going to get to tell you how I felt. I... I didn't want to finish my Pilgrimage. I wanted to stay with you."

He slipped a hand from hers and laid it against the side of her hood, wishing it was her skin, but smiling softly despite the barrier. "I know. I wanted you to stay, but couldn't bring myself to ask."

Tali's eyes lifted to his, brightening as she laid her own hand upon the side of his helmet. "Well... you can ask me now."

He laughed quietly and wrapped his arms around her, drawing her back into his embrace and laying his helmet upon hers. "We already settled that question, but... will you join me, when you can?"

"Yes," Tali replied, smiling and sighing contentedly. "I will."


	10. Not quite like old times

**Author's note:**

_Joker gets another little deviation from canon, for my amusement, and because he has a big mouth. Probably would have blabbed if he'd known Shepard was alive ahead of time.  
I wanted to include Shepard's experience on Mindoir, but spent quite a while debating how to integrate it. He gave a few of his old friends some of the general details, but never the whole story, since it's no longer something that really haunts his waking hours or that he needs to get off his chest. So, you get a retelling in classic Shepard fanfic tradition.  
Omega and Archangel on deck.  
_

* * *

Shepard met Tali's gaze through the windows of the shuttle and the Rayya as the Kodiak slipped away from the liveship, raising a hand before the shuttle rotated and she disappeared from sight. He couldn't help but smile at that last image of Tali's head laid on her father's shoulder while she nestled against his side and waved at him. Miranda and Jacob wisely kept their attention on their consoles, their tension palpable at being in the middle of a fleet fifty thousand strong that would gladly impound their ship and throw them in a cell. When the shuttle slipped out of the Migrant Fleet's perimeter and shot off into FTL, Jacob breathed a quiet sigh and gazed over at the commander who stood behind them, hands on their headrests. "Eight hours to the station, Commander. You can get some rest if you'd like."

Shepard shook his head, forcing his thoughts back to the task at hand. This time, though, that task didn't seem quite so grim, and he gave the operative a faint smile. "You go ahead. It's been a while since I checked out on a Kodiak, and that's ignoring the two year sleep." Jacob chuckled and nodded, unbuckling and moving back to the passenger compartment while Shepard slipped into the seat, pulling up the master systems display while he ignored the glance Miranda gave him. He wanted to pull up his omni-tool and test out the private, encrypted channel Tali had set up between them, but being around the Cerberus woman felt like akin to being around an opportunistic predator.

* * *

"Shepard."

The Illusive Man looked much as he had the day before, lounging comfortably in his chair, though this time the star behind him was a swirling mass of blue instead of red, nearly matching those eerie glowing eyes he possessed. Shepard nodded at him, finding diplomacy much easier this time around, even if he still wished he could step through the field and put a bullet in the man. "You've read Miranda's report and reviewed the data by now, I imagine?"

A nod accompanied a slowly exhaled plume of smoke. "Indeed. This was one of the possibilities I considered, but still..."

"It's disturbing, even with what little I know about the Collectors. And it explains their technological superiority." Shepard frowned and rubbed one of the scars on his cheek while the two men gazed thoughtfully down at the floor.

"Yes, it does. It also explains their ability to utilize the Omega 4 relay when no other ship has ever returned."

"And their ship tore through the most advanced vessel in the Alliance Navy as if it was made of paper, leaving us with two problems, neither of which I see a solution for." Shepard scowled and folded his arms across his chest, raising his gaze to his 'ally'.

The Illusive Man breathed out another cloud of smoke and a faint smile unexpectedly crossed his lips. "Fortunately, I have the beginnings of one. I have a ship for you that may just be up to the task, and a list of dossiers for you to begin building a team." He ignored the doubtful arch of Shepard's brow and tapped the ash off his cigarette, taking a sip of his drink. "I wasn't lying when I told you we have resources, and I always anticipate. I'll be devoting all of those resources to tracking down the Collectors, and you'll need a team to hit them when we have a lead."

Shepard nodded grudgingly. "True, but I'd feel more comfortable with a fleet. I know you don't have much faith in the Alliance or the Council, but I'll speak to Anderson. As for the team, I had a good one."

"Yes, I know. I've even attempted to track them down, but Urdnot Wrex is attempting to unite the krogan clans, Liara T'Soni may be involved with the Shadow Broker, Garrus Vakarian has proven elusive, and Ashley Williams has been off on special assignment. I wouldn't recommend holding out for them."

Shepard shook his head slowly. Liara, involved with the Shadow Broker? He bit his lip, though, and nodded. "I'll see if I can track them down, but I see your point. I may still be a Spectre, though."

"If you think you can get the Council behind you, then by all means. I wouldn't object to that kind of surprise." The Illusive Man stubbed out his cigarette and stood. "I'll track down the Collectors. You see to your ship and team. I even found a pilot you might like." He turned and tapped the console on his chair, and the holographic projection faded away while Shepard arched a curious brow. After a moment, he shook his head and turned. The man struck him as one who didn't make claims that weren't true, but still...

He came to a sudden stop when he nearly ran into someone at the base of the steps, reaching instinctively for his pistol before his jaw fell at the familiar face in front of him. To his credit, his mouth wasn't open nearly as wide as the one he saw gaping at him.

"Holy shit!" Jeff Moreau exclaimed, taking a stumbling step back before he found himself steadied by a pair of gloved hands. "But you... I... _what the shit?_"

Shepard couldn't help but laugh as he stared at the dumbfounded pilot, gripping his shoulders to keep him from falling over. "You've got to be shitting me! Joker, what the hell are you doing here?"

"_Me? _What the hell are _you_ doing here? What are you doing _alive?_" Joker reached up and rubbed a hand over his eyes as if to clear away the vision, but when he peered over his fingers, Shepard was still standing there staring at him, chuckling.

"I'm a damned zombie, Joker. Brought back to life by a Cerberus ice queen and twenty pounds of tech. I woke up yesterday." His happy surprise slowly faded into anger, though, as he gazed at the Cerberus logo on the casual uniform his old pilot was wearing. "What the hell are you doing working for Cerberus?"

Joker shivered unconsciously at the tone of Shepard's voice and stepped back, holding up his hands. "I... it's a long story. I'll tell you about it after I've showed you something." He gestured for Shepard to follow him while he carefully started ascending the steps. "And I think you'll like what I have to show you."

His former commander was staring hard at his back, but he followed along, wondering what new turn this strange drama had just taken.

* * *

Shepard related the events of the past day while they made their way through the station, and Joker was, for once, a good listener, letting him tell the tale in its entirety before he did the same at Shepard's insistence. Mostly. He left out the details about the ship he'd been putting through trials. "So, yeah, I mean, they let me take the lead on refining the new ship, let me fly it, and I just... couldn't resist." He bowed his head with a sigh, gazing out the broad window they'd stopped in front of that overlooked an expanse of darkness. "When they brought me here and told me who they really were, I almost lost it, but I just... couldn't resist." Smiling ruefully, he shrugged. "They promised me its captain would put it to good use against the Reapers, but I wasn't sure I believed it. Until now." While Shepard regarded him curiously, Joker reached up and tapped a panel, slowly flooding the dark room with light while he grinned at the expression on Shepard's face.

"What the _hell?_" Shepard breathed, staring at the sleek outlines of the ship that awaited them, its silver plating gleaming under the floodlights. She was noticeably larger than the SR1, the engines included, and he could tell just by looking at her that nothing in the Alliance could keep up. He shook his head slowly and chuckled. "Tali is going to _love_ this."

"Yeah, good luck getting her away from the engine core." Joker grinned and turned to lean against the window, watching Shepard stare at the ship. "So, what do you think?"

The hint of a smile tugged at the commander's lips. "I think we'll need to give her a name."

* * *

"Can't say I like the lighting," Shepard grumbled as he gazed down the corridor toward the CIC, leaning against the back of Joker's chair with folded arms. "It's like they want us to walk around blinded." He'd had a brief tour of the CIC alongside Miranda and Jacob, and had met a lovely young woman who claimed to be his yeoman and the ship's counselor, but decided to stick with Joker for a while after meeting the most surprising 'member' of the crew.

"_The Commanding Officer has the authority to reconfigure standard lighting parameters, Shepard."_

Shepard glanced back at Joker with a grimace, an expression his pilot returned. "Yeah, you were right. Ship cancer. Maybe Tali's not going to love this after all." He chuckled and gazed down at his datapad, reviewing the dossiers the Illusive Man had forwarded. He agreed with Miranda that Mordin Solus sounded like the most valuable addition, but he frowned at a recent update regarding Archangel which indicated he had attracted the ire of three different merc groups.

"Oh, I don't know. Play that violin of yours for her again and you'll have her melting into your arms." Joker grinned to himself while he ran the final checks on the thrusters and engines.

"She already did that," Shepard murmured, too distracted by the report to notice the sly look his pilot was giving him. "Joker, as soon as we're ready to go, get us to Omega and don't be afraid to push it. I don't think we have much time." He was already walking away when Joker replied, moving on to the next dossier. _Salarian, turian, and now a krogan warlord? Interesting choices, but no Kirrahe, Garrus, or Wrex._ He gave Kelly a nod, receiving a charming smile in return, but continued into the armory where he found Jacob already hard at work, stripping down a rifle. Slipping the datapad into his belt, Shepard gave him a nod and gazed around at the weapons in their racks.

"Pretty standard fare, Commander, but we have a few pieces you might enjoy." Jacob set down the rifle's barrel and wiped his hands on a rag, gesturing to a locker, which Shepard opened, grinning at what he found inside.

"Ah, an old friend." Shepard pulled the collapsed M-96 Mattock from the rack and extended it, bringing it to his shoulder and sighting at the Cerberus logo on the bulkhead. It brought back memories: some pleasant, some decidedly unpleasant. "I shot more than my share of wild tyrnbucks on Mindoir with one of these." Though hunting had largely fallen out of favor among humanity, many colonists preferred to take wild game, just as they grew their own crops. His father had been among them, an expert marksman, and he'd taught his son the same proficiency.

"Yeah, old tech, but it packs a hell of a punch."

"And some batarian slavers found that out the hard way." Shepard's voice was cold as he collapsed the weapon and replaced it back on the rack, staring at it, remembering the feel of the recoil as the heavy rounds ripped into batarian flesh. Pushing the memories of some of the first sapient lives he'd taken aside, he closed the locker and looked over at Jacob. "We're headed to Omega. I hear it's a shithole, so be prepared for anything."

Jacob nodded and returned to the rifle he was cleaning. "Always, Commander. We've got a few different sets of armor to choose from, and they're waiting for you in your locker in your cabin. Send me your preferred loadout and I'll have it ready for you when you arrive."

"Sounds good." Shepard left without another word, pulling out his datapad and pulling up a schematic of the Normandy. _The Normandy. Maybe that was the wrong name for a ship with Cerberus logos plastered all over it._ He frowned at the thought, but pushed it aside and took the elevator to deck three, wanting to hurry through the inspections and introductions so he could send a message to Tali and take a shower.

* * *

He was grimacing down at the datapad and the description of Omega as he entered the medbay. Home to every species in the galaxy, with a high population of batarians. Not the best way to start this mission.

"Commander Shepard."

He started at the familiar sound of that accented voice and lifted his gaze from his pad, blinking at the sight of the silver-haired woman who was giving him a faint smile and stepping toward him. "Oh, gods, first Joker and now _you_? Please tell me this is a nightmare." The sarcastic words poured forth easily, just like the smirking grin that curled his lips while he folded his arms across his chest. Karin Chakwas could be quite motherly, but they'd always played the role of fussy, nagging aunt and rebellious nephew, with the occasional truce.

Karin returned his expression with equal conviction and folded her arms. "Oh, it's a nightmare all right. I'm the evil seamstress, and you're the pincushion." Despite their banter, there was genuine warmth and a hint of moisture in the woman's eyes as she drew close and wrapped her arms around him.

Laughing quietly, he kissed her cheek and returned her hug, dropping his voice to a murmur. "I'm glad you made it off the Normandy, but if you think you're sticking me with any needles when I'm not unconscious and bleeding out, you're in for disappointment."

Karin chuckled, but he heard her sniffle and felt her arms squeeze him a little tighter through his armor. "It seems you haven't changed a bit. Except for all the tech they stuck in you." She pulled back and wiped her eyes, managing a smile.

"Good to hear." He grinned and held up a palm toward her. "But before you try to go poking around to see what they've done, I'll have you know that two very gruff quarian doctors and Tali's own father already took care of that. I'll send you their report."

"Tali's father?" She folded her arms. "You've been awake for less than two days. What _have_ you been up to, and what did you do to that poor girl?"

He chuckled and leaned back against a medical bed, shaking his head. "Saved her life on Freedom's Progress, took her back to the fleet where I got poked and prodded..." Karin smirked and he rolled his eyes. "...by the doctors. Debriefed their admirals, spent some time with Tali, and came here. That's all after I woke up on another Cerberus station and mowed down a few dozen mechs, of course."

"If you were any other man, I wouldn't believe half of it." Karin laughed and took a seat, her expression softening. "But tell me, how are you feeling?"

He shrugged. "Like I woke up into a nightmare. But I'm up to two friendly, familiar faces and one very friendly visor, so things are looking up." His smile had slipped away, but it made a small reappearance. "No time for psychoanalysis, though. I need to check out engineering, get cleaned up, and get some rest. I'll come talk to you later, and you can give me your own story on why you're on a Cerberus ship."

Karin gave him that nagging aunt look, but he ignored it and waved on his way out the medbay. When the door hissed shut behind him, she chuckled and shook her head, pulling up the medical report he'd already been forwarding on his way out.

* * *

He was no tech expert, but you didn't get to be an XO or CO without attending the proper schools on starship operations. He'd left engineering impressed with the new drive core and with a positive impression of the two engineers he'd found down there, no doubt still bickering with each other with well-hidden smiles. He'd then spent a few more minutes with Joker and Chakwas, and now, with his short hair drying from the long shower and a glass of water in his hand, he finally relaxed, sitting on the ridiculously plush couch while he gazed over at the empty fish tank. Really, the quarters were a silly waste of space, but at this point, he didn't particularly care. They'd be comfortable enough to have Tali, Joker, and Chakwas up for a drink, which suited him just fine. The clothing selection was a different matter entirely. _What's their obsession with slapping their logo on every damn thing?_ He glanced down at his chest, shaking his head at the sight of the logo on even something so simple as the black t-shirt he was wearing. Clearly, some shopping was in order when he visited the Citadel.

Yawning, he set down his water and pulled up his omni-tool, smiling at the efficient, customized interface Tali had set up before he tapped the small manufacturer's icon at the bottom right of the screen. Instead of nothing, he was rewarded with the message terminal Tali had set up, finding a message already waiting.

_Shepard,_

_ I miss you already, but Father's actually been keeping me company. He won't tell me what you two talked about and threatened to return to the Alarei if I kept asking, but I swear he smiled. If you keep doing the impossible, the Collectors will end up in pieces and I won't have to bother joining you!_

_ Okay, I'm joking. I know, I'm a _bosh'tet._ This one won't be long, since Father's waiting, but I just wanted to say hello and tell you to be careful. I hope whatever junker they stick you with lasts long enough for me to come fix it up for you. Even Cerberus will have to admit that they can't compete with a quarian._

_ I'll write more later. Stay safe, for me. Keelah se'lai._

Smiling, he tapped up his reply.

_ Tali,_

_ Don't worry too much about the junker. As it turns out, it's fresh off the line and I think even you'd be impressed, though you might roll your eyes at the sound of the pilot's voice and sigh at the fussy doctor. Yes, I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, but Joker and Chakwas are here with me. Joker's is a long story, but the good doctor apparently was briefed on the Lazarus project some time ago and was dumb enough to join my crew again. Good news for me, since it means my favorite quarian will have someone who knows how to cure her sniffles and who can help her with her suit._

_ We're heading for Omega to recruit a couple of people. A salarian doctor who might be able to help come up with a countermeasure to those swarms we saw on the security footage, and a turian mercenary who's been butchering merc gangs with a vengeance. Don't worry, we're already stocked with some dextro food, and I've made sure the galley has the appliances to sterilize what isn't already._

_ There's a fish tank and a skylight in my cabin. Don't ask, because I have no idea, either. No fish yet. Wrex would be disappointed._

_ I need to get some sleep before we reach Omega, so this one will be short. I hope you and your father enjoy your time off. He seems like a good man, especially since he didn't shoot me._

_ I miss you, too._

A few minutes later, he dimmed the lights and lay back on the couch after making sure the pistol was still resting at the ready beneath the cushion. Sleep didn't take long to find him, but neither did the old, familiar dream.

* * *

_ They'd heard the whine of ships, the distant sound of automatic gunfire and screams, while they were laying on their backs beneath the stars at the shore of the frozen lake. He sprinted for the house, having left his best friend hidden up in a tree, while his heart pounded in terror at the sound of the gunfire that was erupting from the house. The chattering of automatic fire was punctuated by the loud, isolated barks of what could only be his father's old rifle. As he reached the door, he heard his sister shriek in horror as the gunfire died away and low, gruff voices spoke harshly in some guttural language he couldn't understand. He paused at the doorway, trembling with fear, but he heard his sister shriek again and he yanked his knife from his belt, a simple but functional blade that was a twin to his father's he'd been given on his twelfth birthday. Without thinking, he rushed into the house and toward the sound of his sister's next scream._

_ When he rounded the corner to the living room, he saw her struggling against a hideous humanoid with four eyes that was trying to drag her out from behind the couch she held a tight grip on. One other stood with a rifle over the body of his father, blood trickling from two holes in his chest and more pooled beneath his back while his sightless brown eyes stared up at the ceiling, Mattock rifle still clutched in his hand. The ugly creature with the rifle turned toward him, but the young man was faster, rushing at him in a surge of rage. He slapped the rifle out wide and kicked the alien hard in the stomach, sending it stumbling over the low table in front of the couch while its ally let go of his sister to raise its own rifle._

_ It was too slow. He leaped at it and slammed the knife deep into the alien's throat with a primal scream of rage, shaking with adrenaline and fury as he ripped it free with a rush of green blood that poured forth while the alien gurgled and toppled, dropping its rifle. On instinct, he dropped to his knees and grabbed the weapon, shouldering it and turning to pull the trigger on the first alien that was already taking aim. The weapon bucked in his hands, pouring out a stream of hypervelocity rounds that ripped through its shields and armor and sprayed green blood and gore over the living room wall. The alien fell, its rifle spraying a wild stream of fire into the couch, and and the youth only released the trigger when its body was ripped open from neck to groin._

_ Once more, he saw his father's lifeless body, but it reminded him of his sister, and his head jolted to the side to check on her, only to find her slumped on the floor behind the couch, red blood already pooling beneath her from holes in her chest and abdomen. He cried her name, dropping the overheated weapon, and scrambled over to her side, lifting her and cradling her in his arms, but her eyes didn't open. Her blood dripped onto his thighs and coated his arms and chest, but he could only clutch her tight, stroking her blood-matted hair and pressing his cheek to hers while he sobbed her name._

_ It was only the sound of gunfire that reopened eyes wet with tears, and his bitter grief was slowly replaced by a burning rage as he gently laid his sister back on the floor. Grabbing his knife, he sheathed it and tried not to look at his father's sightless eyes while he pulled the rifle from his grip. Turning away, he sprinted for the door toward the sound of the gunfire. His stomach clenched tightly when he realized he was running toward the lake, and as he dashed through the trees, he began to see muzzle flashes and hear the screams. He nearly floored Liu Wen, his neighbor, when they collided. The man was babbling, trying to grab him, trying to tug him away with him, but he yanked his arm free and kept running toward the approaching gunfire, catching a glimpse of movement and waiting behind a tree until one of the hideous aliens came into view. He took aim down the sight and fired with a snarl on his lips, and the four-eyed monster's head exploded, shocking its companion. It lifted its weapon and fired from a crouch, but the young man's blood was ice while he took a moment to aim, ignoring the rounds that were blasting chips of bark from the tree. When he fired, the alien was moving for cover and instead of taking it through a disgusting eye, its arm exploded with blood beneath the shoulder as it shrieked in agony and stumbled. It fell to the ground, arm and weapon two meters away. It howled and tried to scramble away as the young man approached with a chest that heaved with rage, and it held up its remaining hand to beg for its life._

_ He stomped the hand into the ground beneath his boot, shoved the muzzle of the rifle against one of its four eyes, and fired._

_ When Alliance marines from the carrier Einstein finally broke through the pirates' defensive perimeters, they'd found themselves too late to save almost anyone. It seemed as if there was no end to the human bodies they kept finding and identifying, but the census data they'd downloaded indicated that at least half the colony would end up missing, taken as slaves. They were grim and silent as they made their way through the colony, bodies littered on the ground, houses burning, blood slick on the snow-frosted grass. They'd found only a few isolated dead batarians, in every case near the corpse of an armed civilian who had fallen to return fire. They were surprised when they walked through woods around a frozen lake, finding over a half dozen dead batarians, all shot through the head or an eye. Only one had a wound elsewhere on its body, its arm blown off, but this one too had been shot through the eye._

_ They found the shooter outside a quiet house, the young man ignoring their approach while he gently and silently wiped dried blood from the cheek of a girl barely into her teens where she lay upon a picnic table overlooking the trees. Beside her rested a grown man, and next to him another young woman, a few years older than the first, both of their faces already cleaned and their hands laid atop one another upon their chests. The youth that had tended to them was splattered with dried red and green blood, the Mattock rifle slung across his back likewise soiled, but he didn't seem to notice as he tended to the girl with hollow eyes._

_ The platoon's lieutenant walked up quietly and took a clean washcloth from the stack, handing it over to the young man who took it without a word and dropped the soiled one with the others. The marine was silent for a long moment before he spoke quietly. "What were their names?"_

_ The youth paused for a few seconds before he laid a hand upon the girl's. "Haley Shepard." His hand moved to the man's. "Alastair Shepard." His voice trembled, but didn't break, and he moved his hand once more. "Lisa McMillan." He and the lieutenant were silent for a long moment while one of the marines entered their identities into the records. "Her parents are dead, aren't they?" His voice was flat and lifeless._

_ The lieutenant turned to his squad member, who nodded. "Yes, I'm afraid so." His eyes returned to the young man, who was nodding slowly and staring down at the cold hand he was clasping. "What's your name?"_

_ Blood-flecked lips opened, but didn't answer for a moment as the blue eyes drifted over to the man that lay before him. His hands trembled as they took his father's and his sister's hands in his. He remembered what people always called his father, what Lisa always teasingly called him. His eyes drifted shut and he bowed his head, voice falling to a whisper. "Shepard. Just... call me Shepard."_


	11. Archangel

The dreams didn't wake him in cold sweats like they once had, only left him with a subtle feeling of disquiet, but it had been a long time since he hadn't had a familiar face nearby to speak to to take his mind off of them. Joker and Chakwas were off duty but asleep, and he had no interest in speaking to anyone else aboard the ship. He'd been sitting at the desk in front of the empty display case for the last hour, reading through extranet news articles of the last two years, but they did little to brighten his mood. While Eden Prime was being rebuilt with alien assistance and the Citadel was likewise undergoing reconstruction, there was no mention of the Reapers, and the Geth were being treated as an annoyance instead of a threat. Sighing, he leaned back in the chair and rubbed the back of his neck. He was beginning to realize what Tali had felt about the original Normandy being too quiet to sleep comfortably. It wasn't the silence itself, but the knowledge that there was no friendly argument going on in the hangar between Garrus and Wrex, no chatting Tali and Adams in engineering, no common bond to a mission or an organization... at least, not to his thinking. The ship felt empty despite a well-staffed crew, and as he gazed through the case at his empty bed, he found himself wishing there was a young quarian woman dozing upon it.

As if someone had read his mind, his omni-tool blinked at him. Pulling it up, he smiled at the name on the new message: Shala'Raan vas Tonbay. There were no words, only a picture, of Tali and himself sitting in front of the broad window overlooking the stars and the Migrant Fleet, visors touching while they relaxed in each other's embrace. While Rael had seemed to reluctantly come around to the idea of his daughter and a human, it appeared Shala's reservations were far more easily overcome. The image and the knowledge was enough for him to return to the couch and fall back into slumber.

* * *

"I should have worn my helmet," Shepard muttered, waving a hand in front of his face at the subtle but permeating stench of unwashed bodies, stale air, and perhaps urine of different species.

"I don't see why anyone would live in this pisshole." Miranda agreed wholeheartedly, but she at least had a small breather on her face. Jacob chose to bear it stoically, but even his face was slightly scrunched in disgust while they neared the door. It opened before they reached it to reveal a batarian striding through, who stopped before them and gave them all a distasteful gaze.

"Shepard. Aria said you were coming. She wants to know what brings a dead Spectre to Omega. I suggest you go to Afterlife and tell her. _Now._" The very sight of the four-eyed alien was enough to curl Shepard's lips in disgust. Between Mindoir and Elysium, he'd always found it hard to get past the prejudices he had toward a species he considered an immoral stain on the galaxy. Sometimes it was a source of shame, especially after learning about the unwarranted opinions much of the galaxy had about the quarians, but he'd never been able to shake it. When it came to the kind of scum that was allowed to wander outside of the Hegemony, though, it didn't bother him nearly as much.

"I don't give a damn about your boss." He grabbed the batarian by the neck and whirled, slamming it into the wall while eight eyes went wide with surprise. His own just glared at the batarian while he pulled his pistol and jammed it into the ugly creature's forehead. "Tell your people to stay out of my way if they don't want me getting into _theirs._ You got it?" Before the batarian could answer, he spun and threw it against the opposite wall, holstering his pistol and storming off while Jacob and Miranda exchanged concerned glances behind him.

They walked for a few moments, glancing around the dingy, haphazard environment. Unlike the Citadel, there were no Keepers or other maintenance crews that kept the floors and walls polished and clean. The entire place practically reeked of desperation and greed, the exact opposite of Mindoir or virtually any other human colony. Shepard stopped in a corner and pulled up his omni-tool to read through the dossier again, but it was short on details regarding Archangel's location, and whoever ran Omega clearly didn't bother posting details to extranet travel guides. Closing the omni-tool, Shepard stared over at the neon sign behind a small line of people being held up by bouncers. Afterlife. He scowled at the thought of having to follow the batarian's advice.

"You all right, Commander? Making enemies right off the bat doesn't seem like a good idea." Jacob had been hesitant to speak up, but the commander struck him as man who appreciated directness. To his surprise, Shepard chuckled and shook his head, gesturing them on toward the club.

"I don't like batarians, but they're like varren. Braver in groups than by themselves, and a show of dominance usually makes them think twice. Still, he might be back with friends." Shepard shrugged as if it didn't bother him and led them on. They attracted a number of stares as they walked past the line being held at bay by an intimidating elcor, but neither he nor the other bouncers at the door tried to get in the way of the three armed humans. Miranda, however, attracted some attention, to Shepard's amusement as they stepped into the dimly lit corridor that reverberated beneath their feet with the thrum of powerful bass. "Should have left the catsuit at home, Miranda." She shot him a glare, but Jacob chuckled along with Shepard while they headed for the next door.

"Don't tell me you've never been distracted by a tight suit, environmentally sealed or otherwise," Miranda quipped experimentally, surprised at the answering laugh and shrug.

"No comment... oh, look, a familiar face." Five batarians were rising from a couch along the wall as they approached, and one had a cloth held up to a bleeding nose, glaring at them with malice. Their hands slowly reached for their weapons, but Shepard folded his arms across his chest while he stopped in front of them with a smile on his face, tilting his head to the right. The gesture made them bristle with anger, but they waited on their bleeding leader to respond, which he did with snarling lips.

"Fucking humans. Aria told us she wanted to talk to you, but she didn't say we couldn't put a few bullets in your joints first." He raised his weapon, but Shepard was faster, reaching out and grabbing the batarian's wrist, yanking his arm down to his rising knee. The forearm snapped with a sickening crack and the weapon fell away, but before the alien could scream, he was stumbling back into two of his comrades from the force of a biotically enhanced punch that cracked his sternum. As the other two raised their weapons, Miranda and Jacob gestured with arms glowing with an azure aura, and they found themselves shoved back or tugged off their feet with surprised yells.

Shepard waded into the batarians with brutal efficiency, snapping limbs with mighty yanks and kicks and breaking teeth with his armored gauntlets. It hadn't been that long for him since he, Garrus, and Ashley had traded different techniques of unarmed combat in the Normandy's hangar, and he put them all to use while Jacob and Miranda just watched in stunned silence. When the last of them was groaning and rolling in agony on the floor, Shepard reached down and grabbed the batarian he'd accosted earlier by the neck, yanking him to his feet with a cold smile while the man coughed and green blood trickled from his mouth. "I warned you about staying out of my way. You people never listen. Next time I see you, I'm stringing your eyes onto a chain and wearing it as a necklace." He had the satisfaction of seeing four eyes go wide with terror at that thought, and Shepard hurled him into the wall with a crack of bone on metal. The batarian fell to the ground and slumped over, unconscious.

Turning back to Miranda and Jacob, he shrugged at their blank stares. "I said they got braver in packs. Not smarter. Shall we go?" They nodded silently and followed as he flicked green blood off his gloved fingers and walked through the final door into Afterlife proper.

* * *

"Try it, and you'll be scanning the inside of your colon." Shepard gripped the batarian's wrist nearly hard enough to crack bone, but he didn't seem concerned about all the weapons that were pointed at him and his team while he stared hard at one of the four eyes that were darting here and there nervously. Aria's laugh broke the tension, and the weapons lowered when she gestured at her guards.

"I'd almost pay to see that. And from what I hear about the late Commander Shepard, he just might make it happen." She turned and gave the commander a tight smile, gesturing for him to take a seat, which he did after he let go of the batarian who stepped back and rubbed at his aching wrist. Jacob glanced at Miranda as they put away their pistols, wondering if they'd gotten in over their heads. Ten minutes on Omega, and they'd already twice come within a hair's breadth of getting riddled with holes, situations Shepard could easily have avoided. But as he gazed up at the casual, slight smile on the man's lips while he was chatting with Aria, he had to wonder if the confrontations had all been part of some plan. There was a fine line between crazy and genius, but he wasn't sure which side Shepard fell on yet, especially when the man chuckled after the asari relayed Omega's one rule: 'Don't fuck with Aria.'

"Simple, easy to remember. I like it, but I suggest your people adopt the same rule when it comes to me. If I have to keep pounding it into their skulls, you'll have a lot of recruiting to do." Shepard was relaxed on the couch, giving Aria a wry smile. He received an amused smirk in response, but Jacob wasn't sure if it was mockery or approval. This bitch was hard to read, and he was sure she'd worked hard to make herself so.

"I warned Moklan not to get in over his head. As long as you don't start a war with my people, they'll figure it out one way or another. If you do, even your skills won't be enough to save you. Now... what brings a walking corpse to Omega?" Aria was just as at ease as Shepard, not for a moment put off by having two biotics and, by reputation, the deadliest human in the galaxy practically within melee range.

"Archangel and Mordin Solus. I need to find them." Shepard laid an ankle on his knee and draped an arm over the back of the couch while Aria's 'brows' rose slightly with curiosity.

* * *

The news hadn't been good. The Blue Suns, Eclipse, and Blood Pack were nearly ready to mount an all-out assault on Archangel's position, and at this point, his team had been under siege for over a week. To make matters worse, it sounded like most of them were dead. Shepard had impressed Miranda with his unflappable demeanor while Aria informed him of the news, but after they'd left Afterlife, he'd led them with purpose toward the waiting skycar, his lips drawn in a tight line. Despite Archangel's reputation, Miranda still disapproved of the choice, as hired guns were easier to come by than genius salarian scientists, but the commander had a good point about the likely order of their deaths.

Fortunately, they came across another hired gun as they left Afterlife, one who was passing a wounded batarian off to a hulking elcor and collecting the bounty Aria had on him. The man was heavily scarred, his armor well-worn but highly functional. As they approached, he fixed them with a stare, one of his eyes cloudy, and then a sly grin at the sight of the N7 logo on Shepard's armor. "Commander Shepard himself. Working alongside Cerberus, no less. And I thought I'd seen everything in this goddamned galaxy." The man gave Jacob a cursory glance and Miranda one that lasted a second longer before he extended his hand.

Shepard took it and chuckled, shaking his head. "Zaeed Massani. I heard a few tales about you, even before getting your dossier this morning. Is it true you managed to throw a grenade into a krogan battlemaster's mouth from forty meters away?"

Zaeed gave him a wicked grin while their hands fell back to their sides. "Fifty. I paced it off. Heard a few stories about you, too. Not bad for someone dumb enough to join the Alliance."

Shepard chuckled and gestured for him to walk with them toward the skycar. "Remind me to tell you how I convinced a Spectre to blow his own head off. Right now, though, we're on our way to pull Archangel out of a tight spot. If you're good to go, you'll find the Normandy at docking bay G23."

" 'Good to go'? Archangel's got all the goddamn merc groups on Omega after his bony ass. I'm 'good to go' with you." Zaeed gave Shepard a cruel grin and patted the stock of the rifle attached to his back.

"That's what I figured. We don't have much time, so expect this one to be messy." Shepard gave the man a glance, but found that the scarred mouth only spread into a wider grin.

"Had a feeling this would be fun."

* * *

"Make it a _lot_ of fun," Zaeed cackled while he nudged the prone, twitching body of Sergeant Cathka with a booted foot. He'd picked up on the meaning behind Shepard's flick of blue eyes easily enough, and had a grin on his face when he jammed the electrified tool into the batarian's back. It hadn't taken the commander long to figure out that the mercenary had some sort of connection to the Blue Suns, one with no love lost, and their brief meeting with the local leadership had elevated it from theory to obvious but unspoken fact.

"I enjoy my work, too, but let's move on before someone complains about you confusing a merc with a guidance thruster." Shepard chuckled and pulled his Mattock from his back as the squad drew their own weapons to the sound of Zaeed's barking laugh. He led them out of the hangar to the main barricade, peering over it with a raised brow as a rifle shot blasted through the visor of a freelancer, even as the man ran in a zigzag pattern.

"Goddamn suicide. That Archangel's as good as I am." It was the first time Zaeed had spoken without enthusiasm, but Shepard only shrugged while Miranda and Jacob traded concerned glances.

"Guess we'd better trade that Mantis for a shotgun, then." Shepard smirked and keyed the armor piercing module on his rifle before he leaped up and over the barricade. Zaeed laughed while he did the same, and as soon as he landed, the commander was already pouring fire into the backs of the sprinting freelancers as he advanced across the bridge. He had faith in his shields to absorb one shot, but if Archangel didn't take the hint, they'd be in trouble. The turian was landing headshots with a speed that would impress even the best Alliance snipers. Zaeed's Avenger chattered furiously beside him while Miranda and Jacob rushed to catch up, and the horde of freelancers was rapidly thinning while they panicked and sprayed wildly up at the window and back at the squad. Their accuracy left much to be desired, however, and by the time the four had reached the building, there was no one left in sight.

"Either he caught on, or he's not smart enough to take the biggest threats down first." Jacob managed a chuckle while he reloaded his shotgun.

"You don't last for a week against this kind of firepower without brains." Shepard led them up the stairs with a grin on his face.

"Or a hell of a lot of rage." Zaeed spoke like a man of authority in the matter.

"Or both," Miranda added as they reached the door to the room where the rifle fire continued, albeit slower.

Shepard was surprised to find the door unlocked and hit the console, raising his rifle. They found a blue-armored turian inside, apparently ignoring them as he walked to the interior window and fired one final shot at a merc they'd missed, who'd been cowering behind a couch. Jacob frowned at what seemed more like an execution than anything else, but Zaeed and Shepard just walked over to the armored turian and lowered their weapons.

"Archangel?"

The turian lowered his rifle and took a seat on a crate, gazing through the opaque visor at the commander for a long moment before he reached up and pulled off the helmet. It was the first time Miranda had seen Shepard's jaw drop, and his rifle nearly slipped out of his grasp.

"By the spirits. I thought it was you, but..." Three humans traded curious glances while the fourth just shook his head slowly and took a step closer toward the stunned turian.

"...Garrus? By the gods, what the _hell?_"

Garrus let out a short laugh and his mandibles twitched in amusement. "Yeah, nice to see you, too. But really, Shepard? You couldn't have at least told me you were alive? Or Tali? Or Liara? You might have gotten a kiss out of it."

Shepard smirked and put his rifle away, folding his arms across his chest. "You don't have lips, Garrus." Zaeed and Jacob laughed while they moved to the exterior window and kept an eye on the barricade after Miranda shot them a glare and pointed.

"Believe me, I'm as glad about that as you are right now," Garrus remarked dryly, but his mirth faded away after a moment. "Seriously, though. Those two took it really hard."

The turian didn't miss the grimace that crossed his old friend's lips. "Long story short? I've been dead for two years. I woke up two days ago. And I've already been prematurely chastised by Tali." He held up a hand when Garrus opened his mouth. "I'll tell you later." He looked around the room, at the bodies in the corner that were draped with bedsheets. "What happened here? I heard there was a team with you."

"That's... a long story, too." Garrus' head bowed and his mandibles twitched. "The short version is that even Spectre training has enough red tape to wrap up an elcor, so I came here to do some good. Even got a team. But we made a lot of enemies, and... yeah, I'll tell you later." Sighing, Garrus rose and reloaded his rifle, leading Shepard over to the window. "They've been trying to wear me down over the last few days, but with you here, they might just try an all-out assault."

Shepard folded his arms across his chest, gazing out over the corpse-littered bridge. "I guess stupid is the rule on Omega. No one knows impossible odds like you and I do." He shot Garrus a grin, earning a chuckle while the turian raised his Mantis.

"True. Hmm... got some mechs coming." He slowly squeezed the trigger on his rifle, but his target's head exploded before he could finish. Garrus grinned. "I see you still enjoy stealing other people's kills."

"If he doesn't, I sure as hell do," Zaeed reloaded his rifle while Shepard and Garrus both smirked at him. The commander had been taking up the slack on his own trigger when the mercenary fired.

"The loser has to buy the drinks." Shepard fired and took the head off another mech while the other two snipers laughed and joined in the fun. Miranda and Jacob could only shake their heads and pull their pistols, falling quickly behind.

* * *

"Guess that means Zaeed's buying the drinks," Shepard chuckled while he and Miranda sprinted through the lower levels, the latter rolling her eyes at the comm chatter.

_"What? Fuck no, Shepard! You're falling behind!"_ Zaeed protested over the radio.

"I withdrew, you old son of a bitch!" Shepard laughed again as he and Miranda reached the door, taking positions on either side. "All right, we're going in." The two snipers took the hint and shut up while Miranda hit the door and Shepard led her inside. Their shields flared to life instantly as a half-dozen vorcha and krogan opened fire, but they held long enough for them to slide into cover. Miranda pulled a vorcha between two krogan off its feet, and Shepard quickly hit it with a throw, grinning wide at the resulting explosion of dark energy that knocked the krogan to the floor and sent the torn vorcha flying across the garage.

"Is this why you brought me, Commander? For the explosions?" Miranda chuckled while she took aim at a vorcha that foolishly stuck its entire upper body out of cover, spraying its neck and head with a burst from her Tempest.

"What, did you think I brought you because of your suit?" Shepard grinned and took aim at a rising krogan, rippling off eight shots that took it in the unarmored face.

_"Wouldn't surprise me."_

"Shut up, Garrus." Shepard chuckled and glanced over at an exasperated Miranda, but she glowed again with biotic energy and pulled another vorcha, which promptly went flying as the second rising krogan was blown right back onto its ass. It didn't even have time to raise its weapon when Shepard approached, firing into its head on his way to the shutter.

* * *

_"We could use some help with this bastard, Shepard!"_

He grimaced and smashed the vorcha that had leaped at him with a glowing fist while Miranda ripped apart the head of another with a burst from her submachine gun. The hideous aliens were mere fodder, but they were numerous enough to delay them while Garrus, Zaeed, and Jacob struggled against the krogan upstairs. Shepard threw a pair of vorcha into the wall hard enough to crack their skulls, putting rounds into them before he sprinted for the stairs with Miranda on his heels. He saw Garm glowing fiercely through the interior window and heard the krogan roaring in their battle rage despite the storm of rifle fire Garrus and Zaeed were pouring into them.

When he and Miranda burst into the room, they found Jacob slumped on the floor, arm bent at an odd angle, Zaeed slamming his rifle into a krogan face, and Garrus leaping for cover while Garm launched a biotic projectile at him. Miranda hit the battlemaster with a warp that exploded against the biotic barrier hard enough to stagger him while Shepard shot Zaeed's foe three times through a knee. As it fell with a howl, Zaeed slapped in a fresh thermal clip, blasting his foe's head apart in a gory mess. Garm turned and stalked toward Miranda, but his barriers were still absorbing the fire from the three of them, leaving Shepard with a scowl on his face. _Fucking battlemasters._ Miranda rolled deftly away from a biotically charged punch that would have shattered her face, and Garm turned toward Shepard with a wide grin.

"I thought I recognized you, human. The Hero of the Citadel. You and Archangel will make fine trophies." Roaring, Garm charged at him with a vicious knife in hand, but Shepard leaped to the side in a roll, leaving the krogan to slam into the wall with a growl.

"I'm out, Shepard!" Garrus yelled as he scrambled among the bunks looking for a cooled thermal clip while Zaeed lifted his rifle and brought it slamming down on Garm's brow plate. The impact only made the battlemaster laugh, and he sent the mercenary stumbling with a blow to the chest.

Miranda's biotics finally broke through Garm's barriers, but the woman was slumping with exhaustion as the krogan just laughed and charged again at Shepard, who caught something Zaeed tossed over. The krogan's mouth opened in a roar, but before they impacted, Shepard flicked the object Zaeed had tossed him into Garm's mouth and leaped to the side, taking a blow on his back that sent him rolling across the floor. He ended up on his side with a grimace, but watched as the battlemaster tried to stick his hand into his own mouth. Too late. Garm's head exploded in a shower of orange blood and chunks of ripped flesh and bone.

Zaeed coughed out a chuckle and rose slowly to his feet while Miranda spat and wiped her splattered face in disgust. Garrus just stared over at Shepard, who was shaking his head slowly. "Nice play, Zaeed."

"Make it a shitload of fun." The mercenary laughed while he clutched at his aching chest and the men collected their weapons and some fresh thermal clips. Miranda tended to Jacob, finding him unconscious with a broken arm, but little other damage.

"I can honestly say that's something I've never seen before," Garrus commented dryly while he restocked his pouch with cooled thermal clips. "And it might have been the only way to take that bastard down. I've never seen a krogan regen that fast. Damned freak of nature."

"Yeah, he could have given Wrex a run for..." Shepard paused and gazed out the window, looking around curiously as a whining noise grew louder. Garrus was the first to spot the source.

"Gunship! Get down!" He dove for cover as a streak shot out from the gunship's missile launcher, blasting the floor in front of him and sending a couch rolling into Zaeed, smashing him against a wall. Shepard cursed and dove behind another couch, meeting Miranda there while they exchanged a glance, both thinking the same thing. _What the hell good is a couch going to do against missiles?_ But the panting woman rose with gritted teeth and fired a biotic warp at the ship while Shepard yanked his grenade launcher from his back, firing at the duraglass of the cockpit, behind which Tarak was snarling with glee at the sight of his nemesis bleeding out on the floor. The cockpit window cracked but didn't break, even after he'd emptied the three shots that were loaded, and Shepard cursed, diving away as another missile struck the couch and sent them rolling heavily into opposite walls.

It was strange to see fear in Miranda's eyes, but he shot her a wink and pulled his rifle from his back, sparing a glance to make sure the display still showed yellow. Stepping out into the open, Shepard shouldered the rifle and squeezed the trigger as fast as he could, sending shot after shot digging into the cracked glass of the cockpit window. Tarak's eyes went wide and he yanked the ship to the side out of the line of fire, but it was too late. An armor-piercing round finally punched through and the cockpit was sprayed with a shower of green blood. Three seconds later, the building shook as the gunship detonated.

Shepard was already at Garrus' side while Miranda used her biotics to pull the couch away from Zaeed, panting with exhaustion while the mercenary groaned and rose, pressing a hand to his bruised ribs. "Miranda, call the Normandy and get a shuttle over here, _now!_" Swearing under his breath, he rolled Garrus off his back and onto his side, grimacing at the shredded mandible, torn face, and the smoking tear in the neckguard of the armor. The turian coughed up blue blood with a shuddering gasp, and Shepard punched the breastplate of his armor. "Don't you fucking die on me you stubborn son of a bitch, because I've got a dozen bottles of turian liquor waiting for you on the Normandy." He quickly yanked out Garrus' medkit and ripped open the medi-gel, working frantically to stem the blood that was softly pulsing from his old friend's neck while wild eyes gazed up at him.

_ I can't lose another one. Not like this._

* * *

**Author's note:**_  
_

_If Shepard comes across as out of character in his treatment of the batarians, don't worry, I've thought about that as well when I first reviewed what I'd written. But I'm satisfied with it. After encountering more mercs and scumbags than he could shake a stick at, he doesn't particularly give a damn about playing nice with them. If they're batarians, they're pretty much guaranteed to be scum due to the Hegemony's iron fist on the average citizen. Not to mention Omega's the kind of place where strength rules, and our commander's received some pretty decent upgrades. Thus, Shepard's brutal display, though he doesn't kill any of them to avoid irritating Aria.  
_


	12. The Professor

**Author's note:**

_Thanks for the reviews. It's interesting how much inspiration one gets just from reading that people are enjoying your writing.  
_

* * *

"What? You _knew_, and didn't _tell me!_"

Liara blinked, leaning away from her terminal at the anger in her friend's voice, shaking her head slowly. _I knew I shouldn't have said any-_ "Answer me!"

The asari sighed down at her lap before she gazed up at the image of her friend on the video terminal. Despite the visor, even she could tell the shining eyes beneath it were burning with anger. And to think the call had started with her quarian friend sounding positively giddy and even bubbly. "Tali... there was no guarantee it would work. How would you have felt if I had gotten your hopes up only to dash them?"

The glow of the eyes seemed to soften, but Tali huffed and shook her head. She knew how Liara had felt about Shepard; it had been obvious to everyone. What was just as obvious was that the asari hadn't been the only one who gave the commander lingering gazes and found excuses to talk with him. And now Liara had left her in the dark... why? So she could have Shepard to herself? But she wouldn't... would she? Tali sighed and could only shake her head. "But_Cerberus_, Liara?_" _The anger returned. "You know what they are and what they've done!_"_

Liara's fingers clenched down on the edge of her desk and her blue eyes flashed with anger. "What else was I supposed to do, Tali? Who else was going to bring him back? The Alliance? The Council? The Migrant Fleet? This was the only way!"

Tali sighed and bowed her head. Trust a scientist to be logical. Except what she'd done to recover Shepard hadn't been logical; it had been obsessive. Except... if the idea had occurred to her instead of Liara, would she have done the same?

_Yes. Yes, I would._

The two women shared another quiet sigh before meeting each other's gazes through the viewscreen once more, and Tali voiced a dreaded question hesitantly. "Why did you do it?"

Liara immediately looked away and bowed her head, leaving Tali to tighten her lips behind her visor.

* * *

Miranda watched the security camera feed from the hangar bay while Shepard slammed his fists into the heavy bag, putting sizable dents into the cushioned foam each time it swung back his way while the metal frame and chain that supported it squeaked in protest. Shaking her head slowly, she resumed her typing.

'The turian is still in surgery, and from what I saw of Chakwas' face, she's not very optimistic. Operative Taylor has a broken arm and a concussion, and Massani has two cracked ribs, but neither is any danger. Shepard concerns me, however. He's taking out his anger on the exercise equipment.'

_'His frustration is to be expected. Vakarian is his friend and would be a stabilizing element, despite their mutual enmity toward Cerberus. But Doctor Solus is a priority. I suggest you recommend to the commander that you return to Omega in order to retrieve him.'_

Miranda frowned and glanced at her other monitor. Aria had forwarded over more info on the salarian physician as thanks for ridding her of the Archangel and mercenary mess, but the news wasn't encouraging. Plague was running rampant in the sealed district, and so were vorcha and gangs.

'I'm on it, though it might be just the two of us. With Shepard in his current mindset, however, I'd pity our opposition. Will have EDI keep you apprised.'

The connection terminated and Miranda sighed. Their second mission, and they'd already taken a beating, even if it had been at the hands of a brutal krogan battlemaster and a gunship. Standing, she moved quickly over to her closet, unfastening her jumpsuit before she turned in surprise at the sound of the door opening. Shepard stood there, still in his armor, dirty and splattered with blood, but he didn't seem fazed at the sight of the sight of the half-undressed woman. "Miranda, gear up. You and I are going after Doctor Solus. Grab some armor instead of that jumpsuit while you're at it." His hard eyes didn't gaze anywhere but at hers, and she only nodded with a half smile.

"I was already about to change, Commander. I'll be at the airlock in three minutes."

"Good." He turned and marched off, cracking his knuckles. Miranda watched until the door slid shut behind him, frowning and peeling off her suit. Time would tell if his attachment to his old friends would prove a detriment to the mission, but despite her reservations, she couldn't deny that his brutal efficiency in combat seemed to be everything his reputation suggested.

* * *

Miranda had a feeling that Shepard wouldn't have anything to say about the smell of burning bodies even if he hadn't been wearing a helmet. She kept up with him without trouble, but the only time they'd stopped moving was when they'd taken cover to tear into some Blood Pack vorcha and krogan that were firing on the Blue Suns. They hadn't exactly been surprised when the turians turned and fired on them, but between their biotics and their marksmanship, the few remaining survivors had quickly fallen. As they approached the door leading to the clinic, Miranda cracked open her breather but immediately winced and resealed it, giving Shepard a sidelong smirk. "The sooner we're off this hellhole the better."

He only nodded and opened the door, rifle at the ready, but at the sight of the unarmed humans at the desk, he lowered his weapon and nodded at them, putting it away. "Looking for Doctor Solus."

One of them gestured toward the back of the clinic while Miranda followed Shepard, glancing around at the many patients and refugees with disgust. She could scarcely believe humans would choose to make their homes on this station. Her thoughts were interrupted by a voice speaking more rapidly than her Tempest could put rounds downrange, and she came to a stop beside Shepard while they watched the salarian discussing medications with his assistant as he worked on an unconscious turian. He was a curious sight, with one horn torn down to a stub, white scientist's garb, and a heavy pistol on his hip, his mouth moving in a long stream of words that seemed directed more toward himself than toward his staff. Shepard just watched him impassively, head tilted curiously to the side until the salarian turned his attention to the two humans suspiciously.

"Humans. Armed, but no mercenary uniforms. Not Blue Suns. Obviously not scientists, not here to research plague. How did you get here?"

"My name is Shepard."

"Doesn't answer my question."

Shepard seemed amused, folding his arms across his chest. "Yes, it does."

Miranda's lips twitched in a small smile while the salarian pondered that a moment until his head jerked slightly. "Shepard? Systems Alliance? Named 'Hero of the Citadel'? Surprising, heard from reliable sources you were dead." Mordin raised his omni-tool and scanned the commander, blinking after a moment and meeting his gaze again. "Here for me?"

"Yes, Doctor. Perhaps you're aware of the disappearing human colonies?" Mordin nodded, but Shepard continued before the salarian's mouth could reopen. "We have evidence they're being taken by the Collectors. We need your help to devise countermeasures to their technology."

Mordin's eyes went wider. "Collectors? Interesting. Theorized that the plague might be a Collector invention. Also explains Cerberus involvement. Surprising to see you working for them, Commander. Read about your history."

Miranda blinked with surprise, but Shepard was smiling behind his visor, a smile that had slowly been spreading. He liked the quick-thinking, pragmatic scientist already. " 'With', not 'for', but that's not the entire reason. So, what do you say?"

Mordin rested his chin on his fingers, musing for a moment before he shook his head and turned back to his patient. "Intriguing, but cannot. Too much work to do. Must cure plague, treat patients-"

"How can we help, then?" Shepard interrupted, bracing himself for the bad news.

Mordin looked up and smiled.

* * *

"I knew it wasn't going to be simple," Shepard grumbled as he stepped over a dead vorcha that was missing a head, reloading his new pistol. To his amusement, the Carnifex packed almost as much punch as the Mattock, but he stowed it and pulled his rifle.

Miranda chuckled dryly and took up a position on the opposite side of the door they'd approached. "Is anything _ever_ simple around you, Commander?"

"Not usually." He hit the door panel and stepped out of cover, moving into the room behind the cover of a wall while he listened to the low, grumbly voices of batarians interrogating a terrified human. He arched a brow at Miranda, who peered around the corner with one eye for a moment before she slipped back and nodded at him, mouthing 'Daniel' and holding up 4 fingers. Shepard nodded and listened for another moment, scowling at the direction the conversation was going. He was hardly surprised to find batarians all too eager to torture to get information. He nodded at Miranda and stepped out of cover, raising his rifle at the head of the nearest batarian. Sixteen eyes shot their way and four pistols raised, but they hesitated when Miranda glowed a fierce blue.

"Let him go," Shepard growled.

"Drop your weapons, or we kill him!"

The commander snorted and shook his head slowly, pulling his rifle a little tighter into his shoulder. "Kill him and I put a round into your eye. Let him go, and you walk out of here."

One of the batarians laughed, but the other two and the leader gave the humans a wary gaze. Heavily armed, well-armored, confident, and deep into vorcha territory. The facts made them nervous. The leader spoke up hesitantly after a moment, slipping a half meter farther from a quivering Daniel and lowering his pistol subtly. "We have your word on that, human?"

"No." Shepard fired four rapid shots, taking two of them in the head with double taps while Miranda's biotics slammed the others into the wall. Daniel looked on in horror while the commander fired two more times and calmly reloaded, turning toward him. "Daniel, right? Get back to the clinic. Mordin was worried about you."

The trembling man's mouth opened wide like a fish a couple of times before he finally found his voice. "Y-you _murdered_ them! How could you?"

"It's no different from any other scum. You just pull the trigger a few times. Now get going, before I lose my patience." Shepad glared at the man, who hesitated for just a moment before he grabbed his satchel and dashed out the door. Miranda and Shepard traded a glance and the arch of a brow before they both shrugged and continued onward.

* * *

"Never simple!" Miranda yelled as she dove into cover, a krogan's overloaded shotgun blast tearing a chunk out of the metal floor a few feet from her. Shepard reached down and grabbed her hand, yanking her up before he leaned out of cover and poured fire into a group of vorcha that was exiting a room at the far end of the corridor.

"Recruiting the aliens on my last ground team was simple!" He chuckled and reloaded while Miranda kept heads down with a stream of SMG fire behind them. "Tali, Garrus, and Wrex just volunteered out of the blue."

Miranda smirked but ducked back into cover when a shotgun blast ripped through the corner. Her curse caught Shepard's attention, and he grabbed her shoulder, pulling her around to switch places. She kept the advancing vorcha at bay with a biotic warp that ripped into a pyro's fuel tank and ignited a rewarding fireball, but she was breathing hard from the strain, suddenly wishing they'd just slapped some medi-gel on Zaeed and dragged him along. A krogan roar from behind caught her attention, and she turned to see Shepard's hands clamped down on thick wrists, a human growl barely audible over that of the krogan's as they struggled. After a moment, the bulky alien grinned with a wide maw of sharp teeth and reared back to land a headbutt, but it suddenly stumbled and gurgled when a knife slashed across its exposed throat. Shepard glowed fiercely and kicked the krogan to the ground before he sheathed his knife and grabbed his dropped rifle, resuming his firing.

With the vorcha ranks thinned, they sprinted into the first fan room and activated it, taking a moment to grab some clips and catch their breath. Miranda gazed on the softly panting commander with some concern. He hadn't rested since they'd set out to find Garrus, and he wasn't accustomed to the strain of continuously using biotics. He glanced at her after a moment and waved a hand. "Don't give me that look. I'll eat like a krogan when we're back on the Normandy. Now, come on." He double checked his rifle and led her back to the door, opening it to see a swarm of vorcha advancing.

_Like a plague of locusts or a swarm of rats. _Next to batarians, they were quickly becoming his least favorite species. He and Miranda fired on the pyros first, aiming for the valves of their fuel tanks that peeked over their shoulders. They were rewarded by a pair of explosions that sent blood and viscera splattering over the floors and pillars, and Miranda grimaced while she followed Shepard out of the room. They were fortunate to find no more opposition until they reached the stairs back to the center of the room, but a trio of vorcha popped up on the opposite catwalk and flashes of flame preceded three smoke trails. "Fuck!" Shepard growled as he shoved Miranda toward cover and dove as well, finding his ears ringing and his arm and side burning with pain when he stopped rolling. He saw Miranda's eyes wide as she gazed over at him, and he looked down to see a few pieces of shrapnel sticking out of his forearm, side, and hip.

_I hate vorcha._

* * *

Tali sighed as she gingerly stepped off the shuttle, checking her omni-tool again. It had been hours since she'd sent a message to Shepard, but she hadn't received a response yet. She knew he couldn't still be sleeping, and her stomach was clenched in a way she hoped she'd never feel again. _Damn it, I should have taken Father up on his offer to take another half day, but he already spent two days away from his duties._ And she had to admit she wanted to return to her quarters for some privacy so she could think over what she and Liara had discussed and message Shepard without fear of her father looking over her shoulder. Her fingers found each other at her waist and began writhing in apprehension as she walked the corridors of the Neema toward her home.

* * *

"For the love of... just shoot them!" Shepard barked at her while Miranda reloaded after missing a shot from the Mantis he'd slid over to her. She shot him a glare that could melt dreadnought armor but brought the sniper rifle back to her shoulder and fired a shot that blew apart the head of one of the rocket launching vorcha. Shepard grunted with satisfaction and fired another shot with his Carnifex that created another fireball on the opposite side of his cover, blowing back an advancing krogan. He leaned out of cover and overheated the clip as he tore the massive head apart with heavy shots, shaking his head while he reloaded with a half-functioning arm. His blood was beginning to make a small pool on the deck, but he didn't have time to tend to the wounds. Fortunately, Miranda's next shot took the last of the vorcha on the catwalk and she ran over, collapsing the rifle and attaching it to his back before she drew her SMG.

"I can't believe the great Commander Shepard wasn't the last one of our little group to get wounded," Miranda teased dryly as he rose from cover and shot a smirk at her, advancing behind a wave of biotic energy that sent two stupid vorcha flying.

"I forgot you were Cerberus for a split second there. Won't happen again." He sprinted out of cover and into the open while a hail of fire followed him into the opposite cover, giving Miranda and opening to lean out and unleash another biotic attack, followed by the entire clip of her Tempest while she began to pant again, too tired to return his verbal jab. Shepard waited until she was back in cover to lean out and pick the head off two vorcha with his heavy pistol, leaving one isolated krogan who roared and started charging. "Idiot," Shepard muttered, stepping out of cover into plain view of the alien that outweighed him at least three times over. Miranda just stared, shaking her head as the commander glowed fiercely and slammed his palm toward the krogan, striking it with a biotic push that stopped it as if it had ran into a wall. As it shook its dazed head, he emptied the pistol into its face while he walked forward. It screamed, hands clutching at its shredded face, but didn't fall until he gave it a heavy biotic kick in the knee that shattered the joint.

The humans were both breathing heavily as they approached toward the second fan room, Shepard moving with a limp and Miranda not even pausing while she fired a long burst into the blinded krogan's face, silencing it for good.

* * *

"Fans back on, cure dispersed, vorcha retreating... very good, Shepard. Bleeding on my floor, however."

Shepard glared at the salarian as he limped up beside Miranda. "It's been a long day, Professor."

Mordin chuckled and walked over with a pair of sterile white medical tools, gesturing for Shepard to take a seat on an empty bed. "Yes, yes, heard news about the combined mercenary attack on Archangel while you were gone. Figured it was you. Speculation is that Archangel didn't escape, though."

Shepard grimaced and reached up to pull off his helmet, dropping it on the bed and running a hand over sweat soaked hair while Mordin gave him an injection in the neck. "He made it out, but-"

"_Doctor Chakwas is still operating. I could inquire about Archangel's current status if you wish, Commander."_

Shepard glanced down at his omni-tool, wincing while Mordin plucked a chunk of shrapnel out of his arm. "No, don't disturb her. She needs to focus."

"_Understood, Commander."_

Mordin glanced at the vanishing omni-tool interface while he applied medi-gel through the hole in Shepard's armor. "Synthetic voice, simulated human inflection. Have to ask-"

"Please focus, Professor," Miranda sighed as she sat beside Shepard and rubbed her temples.

The salarian shrugged and began humming some upbeat tune that sounded vaguely familiar to the commander while he plucked out another piece of shrapnel, earning a hiss from his patient.

* * *

Liara's lips were pressed in a tight line while she watched the footage she'd gathered from Omega, watching as a limp and familiar turian dripped blue blood while a grey-armored human carried him out onto a bridge and toward the waiting hatch of a Kodiak shuttle. She reached out to pull up her message terminal and went so far as to input Tali's address before she stopped and gazed down at the desk with a sigh. She'd already withheld information from her that may very well have ruined their friendship, but would it be any better to let her know that Garrus _might_ be dead?

_Goddess, I should have just returned to my prothean studies instead of coming here._

But it wouldn't have changed anything, she knew. Feron would still be in the hands of the Shadow Broker, except there would be no one looking to recover him. And the protheans had already done their part to stop the Reapers. Liara frowned and closed the message terminal, pulling up the latest feed from Omega. She gasped at the sight of the same familiar human dripping blood from wounds on his side while he limped alongside an equally familiar human woman, and this time she sent the message that she typed into her message terminal.

* * *

"Yes, Professor, it's an AI, and yes, I've been tempted to toss an EMP grenade into the room that houses its hardware." Shepard's limp was less pronounced beside Miranda and Mordin as they approached the corridor leading to the Normandy, ignoring the curious looks they were getting. The various weaponry strapped onto the trio deterred anything more than that. Or perhaps it was simply the annoyance of the salarian voice that seemed to lack a filter on what came pouring from its brain.

"What? Why? Ah, yes, incident on Luna with the Alliance Hannibal VI. Not to mention the geth. Understandable concerns."

Shepard arched a brow at Miranda, who could only shrug. "I think we've underestimated the Salarian STG."

Before Mordin could reply, Shepard's omni-tool beeped at him and he pulled it up, blinking at the name of the sender of his latest message and smiling as he opened it. The contents made him frown, however, and he read it twice before closing the message box, shaking his head. Despite her concern, the Illusive Man's mention of Liara's possible association now truly had him worried.

"Everything all right, Commander?" Miranda's concern at least seemed genuine as they reached the airlock, and he shook his head while they stepped inside.

"Not sure yet." He wanted to pull up the hidden private message terminal and check for a new message from Tali, but not in front of the Cerberus operative. He leaned against the airlock wall and folded his arms with a frown while the decontamination process began and Miranda gave him a curious gaze. Mordin, however, simply began humming while he watched the light show and the mist that sprayed over them.

* * *

They found Karin Chakwas sound asleep in a chair, head resting on folded arms on the bed upon which Garrus lay quietly, his sheet-draped chest rising and falling slowly. Shepard exhaled a deep sigh of relief at the sight, despite the ugly mess of metal and bandages that covered the right side of his friend's face, and he finally cracked a genuine smile. EDI had informed them when they came aboard that Jacob and Zaeed were well on their way to recovery in their own beds, though the mercenary had a few loud curses when he heard that Shepard and Lawson had left without him. Turning, he let the medbay doors slide shut behind him while he ran a hand back through his hair. Miranda approached with tired steps, holding up a soft-sided pouch with colorful labeling. He arched a brow and took it, giving her a faint smile.

"It doesn't look alcoholic."

"A thousand calories and enough vitamins and minerals to make even a quarian healthy." Miranda chuckled and tore the top off of her own while she dropped heavily into a seat at the mess table, taking a large sip.

Shepard glanced at his wrist at the mention of the quarian, but his stomach had been giving him grumbles of protest for the last hour, so he took a seat opposite her and opened the drink, downing it in one long pull. He frowned at the taste, but Gardner set another one in front of him and he downed this one, too, before he stifled a quiet burp and leaned back in his chair with a sigh. "Well, two successful recruiting missions... mostly... and we're done with this shithole. Good enough for me." He winced and shifted at the dull ache in his hip. Painkillers didn't seem to last as long as they used to.

Miranda licked a bead of liquid from her lip and chuckled. "I was going to suggest we look for some equipment in the Omega markets, and there's that information you found at the Blue Suns' staging area that Aria might like to see."

"You just had to ruin the mood, didn't you?" Shepard folded one of the drink pouches and slipped it into the other, smirking at the wry arch of Miranda's brow. "Fine, tomorrow morning we'll do a little shopping and see if we can put the queen in our debt, but then we're heading for the Citadel to pick up the thief. Mordin's brilliant, but he's more geneticist than tech specialist. After that, Korlus, then Purgatory."

"Understood, Commander." She blushed faintly at the sound of her own stomach growling, but Rupert was right on time, setting down two trays of what looked like chicken and some form of pasta.

"Here ya go! Two culinary delights for the Hero of the Citadel and our lovely XO." Gardner grinned and walked off, ignoring the glare he got from the raven-haired woman.

"By the gods, what is this crap made of? Congealed nutrient paste?" Shepard frowned but picked up his fork and knife while Gardner laughed from behind the counter.

"Actually, Commander, I wanted to talk to you about our provisions..."

* * *

Congealed nutrient paste or not, Shepard had two helpings and barely managed to display good manners despite his ravenous appetite. Fortunately, Mordin had come along and mentioned an idea he had regarding modifying their armor to support automated medi-gel injectors and promptly went to work on an idea to further adapt them to contain supplies of the nutrient drinks the biotics would need on their more grueling missions. The salarian also managed to put away almost as much food as Shepard did, mumbling something about his species' metabolism in between hums of that damnably familiar music and rapid typing on a datapad. Miranda had been decent dinner company, at least, even going so far as to bring up her genetic modifications, which was an interesting insight into the perfectionist.

Shepard stretched as he stepped out of the head, a towel wrapped around his waist while he dropped into the chair at his desk and finally pulled up the hidden message terminal on his omni-tool.

_Shepard,_

_ Joker and Chakwas? With Cerberus? I never would have believed that, but then, if I'd known ahead of time you were coming back, well... but I do __**not **__get sniffles!_

_ Anyways, I'm glad to hear your ship isn't going to explode on you. You should send me some tech specs so I can have something to read on my way to my next mission. I wish I could tell you about it, but don't worry. I'll be fine. And once it's done, I'll head to the Citadel and you can come pick me up. I promise you won't have to rescue me from any lecherous turians this time. Unless you find Garrus and bring him with you. He mentioned Omega months ago but I don't know if he ever went. Maybe we can look for some fish for your cabin while we're on the Citadel! Purple ones. Do purple fish exist? I'll do some research._

_ Keelah, I'm rambling even via text. I guess I'm still a little tired. It's hard to sleep in temporary quarters, especially with father snoring across the room. I've become used to falling asleep to music and air handlers, not snores._

_ I'm starving and restless, so I'm going to go get some food and visit one of my old friends, but I'll write more later. Sleep well! And don't snore. You'll keep the fish awake when you get some._

_-Tali_

Shepard smiled and leaned back in his chair when he finished, gazing at one of the speakers in the ceiling. She had a good point about falling asleep to music. Opening his terminal, he scanned through the database and created a quick playlist before he returned to the inbox and pulled up Tali's next message. His smile vanished when he read the brief email, Tali's worry evident over having not heard from him. It seemed a bit strange for her to be worried over not receiving a message for over half a day, but then, he'd just come back to life after being dead for two years. Not to mention the embraces they shared, despite all the unspoken thoughts. He had just pulled up the reply window when he heard his door hiss open and he sighed, turning and fully prepared to give Miranda a piece of his mind.

"Shepard. I heard you collected a few new scars out there."

The human smirked and shook his head at the sight of his bandaged, weary-eyed friend who was leaning against the wall with less weight than he expected to see after _that_ kind of injury. "I've got a lot of catching up to do. Cerberus seems to have left most of my hide smooth and free of my old scars."

Garrus' mandibles twitched despite a wince of pain and the turian gave his towel-clad friend a once-over. "Yeah, you look like a raw recruit. Ah well, probably for the best. Everyone was always ignoring you and hitting on me. Time for you to get a fair shot at it."

"Well, you were always ugly. Slap a little face paint on and no one will be able to tell the difference." Garrus laughed but slapped a hand to his face with a groan while Shepard rose with a grin, walking to his armor locker and pulling some clothes out of the drawers.

"Oh, spirits... don't make me laugh. My face is barely holding together as it is."

"Yeah, I noticed." Shepard chuckled and pointed him to the couch while he walked into the head and got changed. A minute later, he came out to find Garrus rummaging through the collection of bottles that were waiting in a cabinet beneath the table. He wasn't sure who had stocked it, but it probably hadn't been Miranda.

"No dextro liquor? Shepard, that hurts." Garrus pulled out a bottle of purified water and gave it a sad glance before opening it.

"I only got this ship yesterday, Garrus. Don't worry, we're headed for the Citadel, and we can stock up. I'll be saving the good stuff for someone more civilized than you, though." He dropped to a seat on the other couch and pulled up his omni-tool to write up his reply. There was a lot he wanted to talk about with his old friend, but some things were just slightly more important.

"Chakwas wiped off my markings. I'm not civilized at the moment." Garrus took another sip and leaned back in the couch, trying not to grin at his old friend, for his face's sake. "So, tell me, why does Tali get the good stuff?"

"Never took you for the gossiping type, Garrus." Shepard continued typing with the hint of a smile on his face.

"Ashley was a bad influence. Besides, Tali was like our little sister. With a shotgun, and a body count."

Shepard chuckled. "She stopped feeling like a little sister to me a long time ago."

"That explains-"

"_Garrus Vakarian! Get your turian ass back into the med bay or I'll march up there and jab you with enough needles that you'll think you've been bitten by a vorcha!"_

Shepard and Garrus shared a laugh at the sound of Chakwas' voice coming through the comm, but it was the commander that responded. "No deal, doctor. Get yourself to bed. That's an order."

_"You can't order me around in medical matters, young man! I'm-"_

"Oh, yes, I can. This isn't an Alliance ship. EDI, restrict elevator access to deck one to Garrus and Miranda until further notice."

_"Access restricted, Commander."_

_ "Shepard, if you don't bring him down here in sixty seconds, I'll-"_

"Good night, doctor. Sleep well. EDI, terminate communications from Doctor Chakwas to deck one for the next thirty minutes."

_"Understood, Commander."_

Garrus was laughing and clutching at his face with a quiet groan while Shepard leaned back in the couch and grinned, resuming his typing. "I think I'm starting to like you, EDI."

* * *

**Author's note:**

_I was never completely comfortable with Liara's near-complete 180, so I decided to go with a more balanced approach between her obsessions and trying to hold on to her old self via friends... or at least, the one she can get ahold of regularly. Time will tell if it works out well. And whether she and Tali get into an epic catfight. Hmm. Crafty engineer with a shotgun vs. crazy biotic lady. Add a pit of mud and Joker would grin wider than Wrex.  
Okay, I'm joking. ...Maybe._**  
**


	13. The underappreciated Turian

**Author's note:**

_Sorry for the slow update. Well, slow for me. Been writing furiously on another story for a few days and forgot to go over this chapter and put it up. Working 36 hours over a span of 60 also takes it out of you. Hoping to write a chapter today and tomorrow, and a couple on my 3-day weekend next week.  
_

_ It's fun to have a chapter with a lot of dialogue. Shepard and Garrus will punch anyone who uses the word 'bromance', though._

* * *

Shepard stared up at at the stars through the skylight, hands folded behind his head upon the bed. Though Garrus had left when they both began yawning, he'd found the prospect of sleep less alluring than it had been a half hour ago, despite the cello solo that calmed his nerves. Learning about Garrus' year of frustrated wanderings had been harder to hear than he'd imagined, until he talked about the team he'd assembled. They were starting to become something almost akin to a family when Sidonis' betrayal shattered it all, and Garrus' pain and rage were obvious when he spoke about it, despite his practiced calm exterior. Now his thoughts were on the other members of his previous team. Wrex, he knew, always made do: the krogan was a force of nature. He was surely fine. All he'd been able to dig up on Ashley was that she'd recently been promoted to 1st Lieutenant and had graduated ICT but was off on special assignment for Anderson. Even Cerberus, it seemed, had its limits. But she was a survivor, and seemed to be doing well for herself. Tali had told him some of what she'd been up to over the past two years, but Liara was the one that worried him. But contacting her over the extranet didn't strike him as a good idea, and they had no real reason to go to Illium at the moment, so he pushed the thought aside with a sigh and pulled up his omni-tool, going through the checklist he'd made of items on the agenda.

Upgrade their provisions. Research weapon and defensive upgrades. Do some mineral scanning for resources for said upgrades. Recruit the thief, warlord, and the convict. Spend some time getting to know the crew. See Anderson. Contact his mother. And oh, yes: find the Collectors. Shaking his head, he sighed and sat up, sliding up the bed and tossing back the covers and yanking off his shirt. Frustration was beginning to set in again, despite the fact that he had Garrus back, Tali would be returning, and Joker and Chakwas were here. The cause eluded him, though he racked his brain while he slid into the bed and checked the pistols he'd hidden between the bed and each nightstand.

_The fact that I feel the need to have guns by the bed might be cause enough._

* * *

The day hadn't gotten off to a good start when he awoke from a nightmare the prothean beacon had been kind enough to give him, but finding Garrus and Joker at the mess table had immediately brightened his mood, aided by the hot tea and fresh bagels Gardner brought him. Joker's snide remarks about his choice in beverage while the pilot sipped coffee had earned him a slap on the back of the head from Chakwas, who sipped her own tea while giving Shepard and Garrus smirks throughout breakfast. The turian was all too happy to accompany Shepard and Mordin back out onto Omega, if just to get away from the doctor. They were quite certain she was planning something that involved cold metal and a thorough examination of one orifice or reproductive organ or another. Mordin, however, reassured them that she would only do such a thing while they were under an anesthetic. Though it might be a mild one.

Their wounds healed, Zaeed and Jacob quickly caught up, but Shepard sent them on to browse the market while he met with Aria. This time, when they passed through the dim corridor leading to the bar proper, the five wounded batarians on the couch were careful not to meet his gaze as he shot them a smirk. The reception they got from Aria was more friendly, though she'd had a tight smile on her face when she greeted Garrus by his alias, to the turian's dismay and Shepard's amusement. It turned out that the data they'd found regarding the Blue Suns' intentions was worth the location of a cache of mineral supplies, and they returned to the ship without incident and a crate of armor and weapon upgrade mods. Garrus, Jacob, and Zaeed went immediately to work adapting them to their weapon inventory under Mordin's direction, leaving Shepard free to tour the ship. It was a blissfully quiet day, despite the glares he got through the medbay window every time he passed by. Small wonder Garrus avoided returning to the main battery until Karin was off duty.

* * *

"Aaand we're docked. Welcome home, Commander!"

Shepard chuckled and gazed out the cockpit window at the familiar sight of the Citadel docking bay. "I'm amazed my Spectre authorization code is still valid."

"That's bureaucracy for you."

Shepard glanced back at Miranda and shrugged, tugging on his gloves while he walked with her to the airlock where Garrus was waiting. "Keep Joker out of trouble, and make sure Zaeed doesn't put holes in something important. Hopefully once I talk to Anderson, I can get some reassurance that C-Sec won't trouble anyone who wants to disembark. You're lucky the damn Cerberus logo on the ship isn't recognizable to traffic control."

Miranda chuckled. "I'm not sure what the construction crews were thinking. Good luck." She returned his tight smile and turned her attention to the eavesdropping pilot, who quickly turned around and started whistling innocently. She could only sigh while the airlock slid shut behind Shepard and Garrus, wondering what kind of trouble the day would bring.

* * *

"I was wrong. Some things _do_ change," Garrus remarked dryly while they exited the C-Sec substation. Their first taste of the Citadel had been a very bureaucratic clerk arguing with an unfortunate turian, and it seemed proof enough of his friend's theory. Until they met the human Commander Bailey, who didn't seem to have objections to a little five-fingered persuasion. Not that Garrus or Shepard had a problem with the man who had little taste for red tape or bullshit. Now they walked through the bright ward toward the transport designated for the human embassies, taking a look around at the unfamiliar surroundings.

"Well, at least we're not being ambushed by a rogue spectre's untrained goons or being begged by a smelly krogan who wants to join our crew." Garrus returned the grin of his friend and shrugged.

"I wouldn't mind the untrained goons part. Some target practice would be nice. Especially if you got to rescue another quarian damsel in the process."

"Give it a rest, Garrus." Shepard chuckled and typed in his authorization code on a console and an aircar beeped and opened its doors. The damned turian had turned into a high school girl when it came to inquiring about his personal life, though he didn't mind. It was just too much fun leaving him wondering.

* * *

_All right, here we go._ Shepard took a deep breath and tapped the panel. The door slid open with a quiet and polished hiss, revealing a large office seemingly lit by sunlight, with an expansive view of the Presidium. It was an awe-inspiring sight, but Shepard's eyes went straight to the figure leaning on the balcony railing, who looked as if he was lost in thought or memory. It was strange seeing Anderson in civilian clothing, but he cut the same figure of noble authority. The older man's head shook slightly at the sound of the door and he called back without turning. "Udina, I said 'tomorrow', not 'in ten minutes'."

"I know it's been two years, but you can't seriously be mistaking me for Udina, can you, sir?" Shepard couldn't help making a joke, grinning at the way Anderson suddenly stiffened. It was a moment before the older man slowly turned, brown eyes wide at the sight of the armored figure that was walking toward him ahead of a familiar turian.

"My God." Anderson was staring, his expression caught somewhere between shock and suspicion while Shepard came to a stop a meter away, expression softening to a slight smile. There had been dozens of reported sightings about Shepard since his death, and he gave the most recent ones from Omega no more attention than he had the others.

"I guess I wasn't done yet, though I'm sorry to say your present to me went down with the Normandy."

Anderson had been eying him carefully, but at those words a smile found the human councilor's lips and he chuckled softly, shaking his head. "I guess not. Good thing, too, because I owe you a kick in the ass for doing this to me."

"Yeah, you're welcome." Shepard flashed him a grin before he stepped forward and gave his old mentor a handshake, followed by a tight hug.

"Damn, son, take it easy on an old man!" Anderson slipped away with a laugh, setting his hands on armored shoulders and giving Shepard a once-over. "So, do I get to know how you came back from the dead? Where the hell have you been?" Garrus coughed suggestively, earning a smirk from his commander and a grin from Anderson. "Garrus Vakarian. You've been MIA almost as long as Shepard."

They exchanged a handshake while the turian's mandibles twitched. "Yeah. Just don't tell Executor Pallin I'm on board. I'd rather take another rocket to my face."

Anderson's brow arched at that, and he took a good look at Garrus' face as their hands separated. "I suppose I shouldn't complain about my life." He gave Shepard a wry smile and examined the faintly glowing scars on his old XO's cheek. "All right, now tell me what the hell happened." He led them toward the chairs around a small table while Shepard sighed and began recounting how he awoke five days prior.

* * *

"That's... quite a story." Anderson held up a hand when Shepard frowned, shaking his head. "I believe you, don't worry. But Cerberus?" He rose and began pacing, his concern evident on his face. "I'm not sure if it's a mistake or an opportunity. Hell, maybe it's both."

"My thoughts exactly," Shepard agreed, glancing over at a nodding Garrus. "I don't trust the Illusive Man, but I can't help feeling that he's right not to put any faith in the Alliance or the Council, after what I've read in news articles over the past two years." Anderson turned and frowned with anger, but this time, Shepard held up a hand. "You know I'm not including you in that group. But it seems as if everyone was all too happy to label Sovereign a freak geth creation, as if the truth isn't glaringly obvious." The commander scowled, but Anderson was forced to nod his head and sigh, dropping heavily back into his seat.

"I'm afraid you're right. But that doesn't mean Hackett and the Council shouldn't be made aware of what's going on. Officially, you're KIA to both the Alliance and the Spectres, but I'm sure we could get you reinstated."

Shepard paused for a long moment and mulled it over. Being an Alliance soldier had pretty much been his identity for over a decade, and induction into the Spectres had been an honor, and a useful one, but would subjecting himself to others' orders be a good idea with the current state of affairs? He rose and walked over to the balcony, gazing out at the Presidium lake below while Anderson and Garrus traded glances. They'd both expected him to agree without hesitation. Finally, the silence was broken. "Spectre reinstatement would be fine. But if my dealings with Cerberus end up making a stir, I don't want the Alliance officially exposed to the fallout. I can live without the back pay." He turned and gave Anderson a wry smile. "Besides, you and I are going to be saying goodbye on bad terms. I'll be pissed off at the Alliance for ignoring the threat, disbanding my crew, and using me as a recruiting tool. It ought to make the Illusive Man a little happier."

Anderson's face had been tightening into a frown, but it softened as Shepard explained and he finally let out a quiet laugh. "I should have begged Hackett to order you to take this job instead of me. But I see your point, even if I don't like it." He rose and walked over to set his hand on his old XO's shoulder. "Be careful. The Illusive Man isn't just some terrorist thug. If you're not careful, you might find yourself in a very bad spot when you're no more use to him."

Shepard clapped the councilor's shoulder and gave him a wry grin. "Don't worry. Joker's got my back."

Garrus coughed while Anderson's brows shot up, but the humans ignored him. "Joker? He resigned and vanished off the grid a year ago! Don't tell me he joined Cerberus!"

Despite the way the brittle pilot had annoyed Anderson during his tour as the Normandy's CO, the pained betrayal on the councilor's face was obvious, but Shepard squeezed his shoulder and pointed him back to the seats. "Long story, and your first bit of intel." The two men sat back down while Shepard told him what he knew about Joker's employment by Cord-Hislop Aerospace.

* * *

Anderson was troubled by the implications of having such a large and well-connected human company being owned or at the very least manipulated by Cerberus, and frustrated that the intel couldn't be used without implicating his former pilot or XO. It didn't compare to the apprehension he felt at the revelation that humanity's most advanced warship had been replicated and substantially improved by the terrorist organization. Only the Alliance Navy and the Turian Hierarchy had been involved in the SR1's design and construction, and the implications of where Cerberus had acquired the designs were even more troublesome than the thought of private companies being in the pockets of the Illusive Man. The veteran soldier was no stranger to combat, but it suddenly felt as if he was engaged in a war on two fronts while a third army was on a slow, inexorable march. The only comfort to be found was in the confident eye of his protege, even if he knew him well enough to recognize the tension that returned when he gazed distantly out at the Presidium.

When the artificial sunlight began to slowly dim, Anderson had to frown and turn his attention to the three holographic projectors on one side of his office, rising. "We should contact the Council before they retire for the night."

While the councilor put through the request for a meeting, Garrus' mandibles twitched from his spot beside Shepard. "Remember what I said about preferring rockets over speaking with the Executor? I'm starting to have that same feeling."

"Coward." Shepard chuckled, but straightened and put on an impassive face while he clasped his hands behind his back as the Council's images sprang to life.

"It's late, Anderson. What do you..." The turian councilor, Sparatus, was as arrogant as ever, but his voice trailed off when he spotted Shepard. The shock on the painted face wasn't as delightful as the sight of glimmering eyes behind a purple visor, but it was certainly a memorable moment.

Shepard stepped forward and nodded to the councilors. "This meeting was by my request. Anderson told me I'm officially listed as KIA, but I felt it was best to report to you before the media caught wind of my return."

The asari councilor, Tevos, had always been the most unflappable, but even she was staring at him with the others, though she found her voice first, a smooth and diplomatic tone despite her surprise. "Your 'return'? Shepard, all reports were that you were killed in a surprise attack by an unknown vessel in the Omega Nebula."

"I was. Cerberus recovered my body and spent the last two years reconstructing me. I woke up five days ago in one of their facilities."

His calm response drew another round of surprised stares, but this time Sparatus was the first to find his voice, and it wasn't happy. "You expect us to believe that you were dead for two years and _Cerberus_ returned you to life? You must think us fools. Walking out on your responsibilities without even a resignation! We should-"

"Enough," Shepard interrupted with a cold voice, pulling up his omni-tool and the medical reports from Mordin and the two quarian doctors. "Just be quiet for a moment and take a look at the medical reports I'm forwarding you. Assuming you can get over your racism long enough to actually read something from quarian and salarian physicians." He'd never admit to anyone but Garrus and Tali just how good that felt. He'd always been diplomatic and respectful toward Tevos and the salarian councilor, Valern, but Sparatus had quickly run afoul of Shepard's sharp tongue. He could swear he'd seen Tevos' lips twitching against a smile a few times in the past when the two males were sparring with words.

Tevos and Valern were shocked, but Anderson and Garrus had to fight chuckles at the sight of the fury in Sparatus' eyes and the sputtering twitch of mandibles. "How dare you!"

"Just read, Councilor. We'll be here when you're finished." Anderson interjected, winning the battle with his face to keep it locked in a neutral diplomatic expression.

"Are you sure he knows how to read?" Garrus whispered sidelong at Anderson as the councilor came up to stand beside him. To their credit, neither laughed, but Shepard gave them a sharp glare while the three councilors scanned the report and the attached images. The commander was impressed that Sparatus actually remained silent long enough to read the document. Valern, with her quick salarian mind and more substantial scientific experience, finished first and digested the information more readily than her counterparts. After pulling up some information on her terminal, she gazed at Shepard curiously.

"It is plausible, but I would like to meet with Doctor Solus and discuss this with with him."

Shepard nodded and gave her a warm smile. "Of course."

* * *

Mordin had been irritated over the interruption, but he'd made his way quickly to Anderson's office and briefed the councilors in private while Garrus and Shepard were excused for the evening. After getting some food from a small asari cafe in a quiet corner of Zakera Ward, they walked side by side while Garrus sighed. "You've typed more words out on that thing than you and I have traded since we met on Omega. Who are you talking to?"

Shepard laughed while he kept typing, updating Tali on their meeting with the Council. She'd be leaving for her mission in a few days and would be out of contact for perhaps a week, and they were both determined to make the most of it. Hopefully, he could find a quiet spot where he could ditch Garrus for half an hour and talk with Tali over a live connection, something he couldn't do on the Normandy without being recorded by that AI, or one of the damned bugs that was probably installed in his cabin. "Just keeping Tali updated."

Garrus grinned and pointed him toward an interesting prospect dubbed 'Rodam Expeditions'. "Let me know if you do the same for Liara and Ashley. And let me be there for any reunion. I haven't bet on a fight in a long time."

"Oh? In that case, remind me to tell Zaeed and Jacob to put a wager on the two of us. I haven't kicked a bony turian ass in a while."

Garrus chuckled at the expression on the face of the shopkeeper behind the counter. Clearly the man had overheard Shepard's comment while the human was distracted and buried in his little love letter. "Careful, Shepard. I think you offended the management."

"Hm?" Shepard glanced up from his omni-tool and saw the unfamiliar turian face go from angry to curious to shocked when dark eyes scanned the armor, the N7 logo, and finally the face. "Oh, sorry."

"Shepard? _The_ Shepard? The one who put down Saren Arterius?" The turian shopkeeper suddenly looked elated, spreading his arms wide. "By the spirits! Shepard, in _my_ store!"

The human glanced around at the other staring shoppers, and a few passersby who were at the door, gazing in with wide eyes. _Uh oh._

"Looks like you have a fan club, Shepard." Garrus grinned at the glare his friend shot him.

* * *

He was content to let Garrus distract the crowd, regaling them with a tale about the battle of the Citadel that was at least three-quarters invented fantasy while he browsed the shop's inventory. There were a few nice mods and some armor upgrades, and even a semi-automatic sniper rifle. When he put the requisition through, to be delivered to the docking bay, he turned to see the crowd entranced with the story while Garrus explained how he ripped off one of Saren's mandibles with his bare hands and punched him off the petitioner's stage into the garden below. Shepard chuckled, remembering how Saren had instead put a bullet into his own head and fallen, but he folded his arms across his chest and gave inquisitive eyes a small smile. For the few days they'd spent on the Citadel after the battle, they'd become instant celebrities and had reporters and fans on them when they stood still for more than thirty seconds, but it was strange and uncomfortable to be under the scrutiny with the knowledge that the true nature of the threat had never been made public. Fortunately, Bailey came along and gruffly reminded the crowd of station rules against loitering and Shepard and Garrus escaped with a grateful glance, resuming their tour through the ward.

"Who knew people could be so gullible?" Shepard quipped while he resumed typing out his letter to Tali. "I mean, a turian beating a krogan's body count? A C-Sec washout defeating a Spectre?"

"Yeah, that's like saying a quarian could fall for a human."

"Remind me to tell Tali you said that. After I give her one of those new Eviscerator shotguns."

"Forget I said anything."

* * *

Despite the glamored image that the Alliance had used him in recruiting ads that had become the public face of the deceased hero, it didn't take long for word to spread and for the human to begin attracting whispering voices and stares while they made a sweep of the ward. Fortunately, Garrus was a fine distraction, allowing his friend to purchase over a hundred thousand credits' worth of food, drinks, clothes, and assorted upgrades... and even a few fish and a hamster. The bubbly asari behind the counter, elated at her new advertisement, had mentioned something about it being a miniature giant space hamster, but all Shepard cared about was that it was small and furry. It reminded him of the social rodents that had often come up to Lisa and him when they were sitting by the lake on Mindoir, sniffing at their clothes and eagerly snatching the little scraps of fruit she always brought with her. Garrus gave him a few amused words at the purchase, but he didn't laugh nearly as hard as when his friend pawned off one of the fish to a particularly gullible krogan who was obsessed with the thought of fish in the Presidium lake.

"A hundred credits versus three thousand credits. Damn right I'm evil." Shepard pocketed the chit and grinned, gesturing toward the transit terminal. "Come on. Let's get back to the Normandy. There should be a couple of crates of dextro-friendly liquor waiting for us outside the airlock."

Garrus' face brightened. "Perfect. While we drink, you can tell me where to find a decent grip on an asari."

Shepard sighed and raised his eyes to the ceiling. "Garrus, how many times do I have to tell you that Sha'ira and I just _talked?" _

"Uh huh. And what about that time Liara and Tali spent the night in your quarters? Embrace eternity, Shepard."

"Shut up."

* * *

**Author's note:**

_Valern's gender was always a bit confusing to me, since lore says the female dalatrasses were the politicians. So in this one, Valern's female._


	14. Thievery and research

**Author's note:**

_ I decided to have some fun with this one, at the expense of poor Garrus and Tali. In the games, Kasumi was never one of my favorites, but that mostly because of her abilities and her limited nature in conversation as a DLC character. In this story, though, I think she might end up one of my favorites for the humor she brings._

* * *

"No, Anderson doesn't miss you, Joker."

The bearded pilot smirked into his coffee and took a mighy gulp before he replied. "Yeah, well, the feeling's mutual. Damn hardass."

Shepard chuckled and shook his head, leaving his pilot to limp the last few steps to his seat – real leather! - in the cockpit while he headed for the airlock. He and Garrus had helped load their new equipment onto the ship, grumbling all the while about how unhelpful Anderson had been for the benefit of the surveillance devices installed everywhere, but Shepard made an excuse about forgetting to buy food for the hamster and promised he'd meet the turian later for that drink. Garrus, naturally, had voiced his theory that the commander was going to visit an asari consort, but Shepard ignored him and headed for the elevator, wondering just what had gotten into that turian_._

He took a moment to admire the new Normandy, remembering the sight of the original and recalling Tali's amazement upon seeing her for the first time. The memory brought a smile to his lips while he turned away and headed for the empty docking bay next to theirs, walking out to the end of the platform and taking a seat against a crate. As he pulled up the hidden menu Tali had put into her old omni-tool, he idly wondered why these crates were placed all over at seemingly random locations. He was still contemplating it when the video screen sprang to life and he saw the shining silver of eyes behind dark purple glass. Tali's smile was as obvious as his, despite her visor.

_"Shepard! I didn't think you were ever going to call me." _He couldn't help but grin at the way she somehow managed to sound irritated, happy, and flirtatious all in the span of eleven words.

"Sorry, but I don't like the thought of Cerberus eavesdropping on our conversations." He glanced over at the Normandy a hundred yards away, contemplating turning the screen to let her see, but decided against it.

_"Neither do I. Stupid bosh'tets."_ Tali muttered, but her voice quickly brightened again. _"How are you? How's Garrus?"_

"Same old Garrus, really. New scars from the rocket he took, but like I said, Chakwas fixed him up well enough. Even if she's not a miracle worker." He gave her a wink, and she laughed.

_"Well, I'm glad your scars are fading, and it's nice to see you smiling. You sounded unhappy for a few days. I guess Garrus is good for _something._"_

"He's a poor substitute for you, Tali." He smiled at the way her head tilted down and away slightly, still adept at reading her blushes. "I bought a few fish, but no purple ones yet. You can pick the next batch. Oh, and I convinced a krogan that I fished one of them up from the Presidium lake and sold it for thirty times what I bought it for."

_"You what? If a vengeful krogan tries to kill you, I can promise I won't be nearly as unhappy as you will be when I catch up to you."_

He couldn't help but grin while he watched her fold her arm over her chest through the viewscreen and listened to her accented voice turn dry. But he mirrored her pose and shrugged. "Miss Zorah, what's the matter? You don't think I can handle one smelly krogan? After what I did to save you from that mech?"

* * *

_Keelah, he just __**had**__ to bring that up, didn't he?_

Tali smirked behind her visor, feeling her cheeks warm up. He'd been quite dashing and breathtaking when she'd had a few moments to think about it, even if part of her still wanted to strangle him for jumping _point-blank_ in front of a heavy mech. He hadn't even known who he was protecting! Of course, she was still undecided on whether or not that fact made it more or less impressive. Her thoughts returned to his eyes and his arching brows, and she cleared her throat. "N-no, it's not that. I just don't want you stinking like a krogan the next time I hug you."

She suppresssed the giggle she wanted to let escape at the sight of his wry smirk. _"I try not to let them get __**that**__ close, Tali. Krogan are a lot less fun in close quarters than quarians are."_

The sight of his grin made Tali wonder if he could tell her jaw had dropped behind her mask. "I... remind me to tell Wrex you said that." She let him laugh for a moment while she grinned, enjoying the warmth in her cheeks and heart. "By the way, you're a shameless flirt."

_"I am not. Besides, you're the one who tugged me onto the dance floor." _He looked wounded, but the glimmer in his eye made her smile.

"It wasn't a complaint, you silly _bosh'tet._ Besides, you know you enjoyed it."

_"I know. And I did."_

They shared a laugh while she lowered herself to her side on her sleeping mat and propped her head up on her hand, smiling at the image of him in her omni-tool's projected viewscreen. "So, what kind of trouble have you and Garrus been getting into?" At the sight of him wincing slightly and rubbing the back of his neck, she grinned with anticipation. This was going to be good.

* * *

Tali smiled up at the the dimly lit ceiling of her small quarters an hour later, fingers laced on her belly while she hummed softly along to the music her omni-tool was playing. Her shoulder was still a bit sore from when she'd fallen off her mat with laughter at Shepard's imitation of Garrus' wild stories, but she hadn't felt this good in a long time. With the exception of the Rayya almost five days ago. She had to be up in five hours for her engineering watch, but she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep. Chewing on her lip absently, she debated for a moment before she activated her omni-tool and pulled up the extranet on an account she'd hijacked from a bastard of a turian who'd tried to swindle the fleet on a shipment of nutrients. She'd done research on human customs before, but this time she couldn't suppress her quiet laugh at the thought of what the poor turian would think when he found he'd somehow researched human courtship and mating practices.

Ten minutes later, instead of giggling, Tali was frantically muting the sound on an educational video while she stared with wide eyes.

* * *

"Where's the pet food?"

Shepard chuckled and shook his head as he descended the few steps, seemingly unsurprised to see his turian friend making himself right at home on the couch. "I knew I forgot something." He set the three bottles of Turian liquor down on the tabletop and dropped to a seat, pulling a clear and a blue glass out from under the table and sliding the latter over to Garrus, who simply shrugged at it and popped the cork with a talon.

"You'd just have to wash it." Garrus took a sip of the brandy and sighed contentedly.

"Yeah, good point. I'd never get it clean."

"Exactly." Garrus watched as Shepard debated his choices before grabbing a bottle of asari wine. An unexpected choice, given his friend's preference for dark beers or some earth liquor called 'scotch'. "Asari, huh? What prompted that choice?"

The question earned him a smirk while the commander poured himself a glass. "A good mood, Garrus. A rare thing, with you around."

"Whatever embraces your eternity, Shepard." Garrus took another sip while his friend laughed, both of them leaning back in the couch.

"All right, why are you suddenly so curious about my... 'R&R time', Garrus? Something I should know?"

"Well..." Garrus' voice sounded sly in its odd timbre, and he paused before answering, snickering first at the uncomfortable look on his friend's face. "Wrex and I had a bet. Quite a.. sizeable one."

Shepard smirked and set his glass down, folding his arms across his chest. "I should have known. And just what was this bet?"

"Oh, just a simple matter of who you'd pick. Actually, half the crew was in on it. It was more of a pool, but Wrex and I had our own private wager."

"Uh huh. Let me guess: he picked Tali, and you picked Liara."

"Yeah. Come on, Shepard, you can't let me lose _again!"_ Garrus looked plaintive, but his commander was laughing and shaking his head.

"Damn, Garrus, how many times did I warn you not to bet against Wrex?"

The turian's face fell while he muttered something unintelligible against the neck of the bottle.

Shepard couldn't resist adding insult to injury after he took a sip of wine. "No, I won't give you a loan."

"I hate you."

* * *

Garrus remained on the Normandy the next morning, leaving Shepard to face the council alone. Apparently, he was a sore loser. Fortunately, the council was as agreeable as they ever had been, which was to say that they were tolerable, if nothing else. Mordin would be receiving a fruit basket or some new dangerous lab toy as thanks for the peace of mind he'd given the councilors, Shepard had decided, after the council upheld his Spectre status and seemed to indicate they'd stay out of his hair if he stayed out of their crests, fringe, and horns. It had been more than he'd been expecting, and the day got off to a good start, at least.

Of course, that left Anderson. The two men gazed at each other for a long moment before the councilor broke the silence with a chuckle. "I know, son. Believe me, I'd like to be able to be at your disposal when you're off wandering the galaxy on a ship full of Cerberus, but you're right about the whole thing. It's too good an opportunity to pass up, especially with the Illusive Man having his fingers in what might be half the damned Alliance. Just... stay safe out there. Your mother will skin me alive if you end up missing again and... and you haven't talked to her yet."

As predicted, Anderson didn't miss the grimace on his former XO's face when his mother was mentioned, though the man did smirk at the sheepish expression on the face of the Hero of the Citadel. "Not... yet. Honestly, I don't want to do it over the extranet. For all she knows, it could be a trick or some damned thing." He sighed and slumped slightly where he was leaning against the balcony railing. He missed her, wanted to wrap his arms around her and reassure her that he was indeed her son before she started reading things in the news, but...

"I suppose that's a good point." Anderson pulled up his omni-tool and searched through it for a moment. "Well, the Orizaba will be visiting the Citadel in ten days. If you can swing by, I'll use some of my meager influence and set up lunch or something."

Shepard turned and gave Anderson a curious – and perhaps suspicious – gaze. "Why would she meet you for lunch?"

"I'll make something up... wait a minute." Anderson arched a brow, but he shook his head when Shepard let out a laugh and stood upright. "Very funny."

"Call it misplaced revenge. Garrus has been having a little fun at the expense of my own personal life."

"Even I'm not dumb enough to go there. Don't expect any help from me."

"It's nice having friends you can count on."

* * *

Reluctantly, they'd parted with a firm handshake and a quick hug, and Shepard put on his best irritated face when he left the office, just in case the Illusive Man's eyes were more widespread than they imagined. He kept it on when he reached the security checkpoint, but something was bothering him as he passed by the security desk, glancing around with the appearance of casual curiosity. When he rounded a corner, he pulled his pistol and waited for a moment before he reached out. He was almost surprised when he felt his hand on something solid, and was definitely surprised when he heard a feminine gasp. "That's no way to introduce yourself to a lady!"

The air shimmered and the cloaking field – a very good one, at that – dissipated to reveal a hooded woman whose shadowed eyes seemed to be glinting at him while her lips pouted, the bottom one painted in a narrow vertical line. She was compact, slender, and looked Japanese, and it took him a moment to realize just where he'd grabbed her. When he pulled his hand from her chest, she smirked and folded her arms. "Really, Shepard, what would your girlfriend say?"

He sighed heavily, remembering the dossier that detailed the clever thief. "I wouldn't call her my girlfriend, but she'd probably short out your cloaking field, slap me upside the head, and call me a _bosh'tet_."

"Quarian, huh? I thought so, but it's hard reading that tiny omni-tool print when the other person's walking."

He holstered his pistol, smirking at her. "It's not polite to read other people's private correspondence, Miss Goto."

"No..." she smiled mischievously and leaned in conspiratorially, whispering. "...but it's a lot of fun."

Shepard couldn't help but laugh, shaking his head and gesturing for her to tag along. "I can imagine." Despite the fact that the woman had been hired by Cerberus and had agreed to contract to them, there was something about her that put him at ease. "Nice cloak, by the way."

"Thanks!" She replied cheerfully, though she gave him a dark-eyed gaze beneath her hood. "But how did you even know I was following you? You're not really known as being the Alliance poster boy for all matters tech."

"I'm Commander Shepard."

" 'and this is my favorite store on the Citadel', yes, I know. But that doesn't answer my question."

He grinned, remembering his introduction to Mordin. "Yes, it does."

* * *

"Come on, seriously, you have to tell me!" Kasumi was still cajoling him as they exited the airlock, attracting Joker's intrigued stare.

"Hey, Commander. New recruit? I swear, they're getting smaller every year."

"And prettier," Kasumi replied with a dazzling smile, one Joker couldn't help but agree with, nodding.

"Good point."

"I'm Kasumi Goto, thief." She stepped over and extended her hand while Shepard watched with amusement, arms folded across his chest.

"Uh, Joker, pilot." He shook her hand and she gave him a small bow. "Well, Jeff Moreau, but everyone calls me Joker."

"Don't ask him why. You're better off not knowing." Shepard ignored the smirk Joker gave him when the handshake ended. "Just avoid him in the corridors or his ego will knock you over. Joker, set a course for Korlus. We're low on dangerous aliens."

"And overflowing with crazy humans, yeah, gotcha." Joker turned his seat around while Kasumi grinned back at Shepard.

"This is going to be fun."

"You have no idea," Shepard replied quietly, chuckling while he tugged his gloves off and headed toward Kelly. He hadn't spent as much time talking to the crew as he'd intended, and she seemed a good place to start. Before he got far, though, he felt a tap on his shoulder, and he turned to see Kasumi looking up at him quietly. He could already tell this was an unusual mood for her, and he gestured toward the elevator. "You need to talk to me about something?"

She nodded and followed, waiting until the doors closed behind them. "Actually, I was hoping we could take care of something while we're in the neighborhood."

* * *

In the days of half a light year per hour travel, 'in the neighborhood' was a fairly broad term, though this time the phrase was applicable enough. Bekenstein was only a few hours from the Citadel, and the timing couldn't have been better for Kasumi's little plan. Of course, her plan involved feeling more naked than he'd been when he'd awoken under a thin sheet upon a cold metal table back on Lazarus Station.

"Stop squirming."

He smirked over at her as he brought the aircar in for a landing, pulling his finger away from his shoulder. "Small wonder I stick to casual clothing and combat gear. I don't know what this is made of, but it itches like crazy."

"I told you to see the doctor before we left!"

"No, you mumbled something about getting used to it." He glanced down at the high-collared suit jacket and slacks, frowning at the shoes on his feet. Without boots, he felt like he'd end up tripping and falling on his ass if he took off running while one of the delicate little things flew off his feet. Well. He'd worn this crap plenty of times before, though it was usually navy blue with gold trim.

"You _will_ get used to it. Now stop complaining. You can keep it and wear it for your not-girlfriend." Kasumi had been a bit subdued on the ride while she put the finishing touches on her explanation of the plan, but her humor seemed to be returning as the adrenaline started to flow.

"She's... oh, forget it. I'm putting on my Commander Shepard face now." He shot her a smirk, ignoring the arch of her brow as they landed. He stepped out of the car with the same impassive, calculating expression the old squad had called 'the deadliest face in the galaxy'. Of course, he'd argued that Wrex owned that one, mostly due to the sheer ugliness. It had been worth a laugh. Kasumi tagged along behind him respectfully as if she were a servant as he approached the front door. _All right, here we go. _Gazing over at the golden statue of Saren, he hoped he could blow the damned thing up after they had Kasumi's partner's greybox in their possession.

* * *

"There's a lot of them!" Kasumi grumbled when she returned to cover under stealth, reappearing and reloading her new Locust SMG. Breaking into the vault had turned out to be child's play, though Shepard had to tolerate Hock's bloviating in order to get a voice sample to bypass one of the security measures.

"Now who's complaining?" He chuckled and pulled his head back into cover while he reloaded his Mattock, ignoring the swarm of hypervelocity rounds that were impacting all around them. Sure, maybe it was suppressing fire, but these Eclipse mercs were still lousy shots.

"I told you we should have brought Miranda to distract Hock." He leaned out of cover and rippled off shots until the clip heated to capacity, letting out a grunt of satisfaction when the lieutenant and three others fell dead. The others dove for cover, all thoughts of rushing abandoned.

"She said she didn't have a dress!" he protested, slapping in a new clip before he vaulted over his cover and biotically slammed a merc into another, taking down a third with two heavy shots from his rifle while Kasumi ripped apart a fourth with her new toy.

"Women always have a dress." She double checked to ensure the greybox was still in a pocket and followed him into the next room while he rolled his eyes. "Well, except maybe quarians."

"Don't _you_ start with me," he scolded her as they slid into cover while doors opened to reveal another squad and a heavy mech. "And you said in the cockpit this would be fun."

"I was talking about recrutiing dangerous aliens!"

He laughed while he fired alongside her, mowing down the infantry stupid enough to stick heads or limbs out of cover. Thank the gods most of his squad so far had a sense of humor, because he was already getting tired of gunning down mercs. When they'd thinned out the infantry, the YMIR was close enough to open fire, and Shepard sprinted out of cover, diving behind the wall separating the two bay doors. "Keep it distracted."

"Not fun! Not fun at all!"

He chuckled at her protests, but she unleashed an electrical overload that made the mech's shields flare while he fired on the run, taking down the last two remaining mercs from their flank before he ran around an armored vehicle to come up on the YMIR from behind. It was close to Kasumi's cover, and he saw the flicker of her cloak as she dashed to safety, but he was close enough to try a new tactic on the hulking form. This time, he just leaped up onto its back and pressed the muzzle of the rifle to its head, filling the heatsink to capacity while he held on to an armored shoulder plate. Inside its shield perimeter, the armor-piercing rounds blasted deep chunks out of the head, and it started sparking and beeping ominously.

"_Move!"_ Kasumi yelled, and he jumped off, following her to cover behind the armored vehicle just before a wave of heat washed over them, forcing them to squeeze their eyes shut. When the heat faded and the stench of atomized metal reached their noses, he grimaced and peered out from cover.

"What the hell was that? The last one I took out didn't do that."

"Yeah, they self-destruct catastrophically when you destroy their heads."

"Oh," he chuckled, standing and pulling her up with the grip of hands. "That explains it."

"Explains what?" she inquired while they reloaded and headed for the next door.

"I didn't destroy its head. I ripped it off."

He ignored her stare and hit the panel to open the next door, Commander Shepard face back on while he fired and sent a merc slamming into a vehicle with a biotic shove.

* * *

"Another fucking gunship," Shepard muttered after they'd dived into cover. This time, he'd brought a new Cerberus toy instead of the grenade launcher, and it seemed the perfect time to use the Arc Projector's electrical attack. While they ignored Hock's broadcasted taunts, Kasumi held off the infantry and he fired a shot at the gunship. Its shields flared brilliantly, and again at the second shot, but after the third, its guns opened fire and sprayed the area with rounds.

"I can see why you don't like them," Kasumi groused, reloading and peeking around cover to fire one-handed at another group. "And he just doesn't shut up!"

"It could be worse!"

The thief checked her omni-tool and sighed, watching as the gunship's shields quickly recharged. Redundant power supplies. "It's worse."

Shepard turned to gaze at her with an arched brow before he unloaded his heavy rifle into a fresh group, eliminating them before they could get into cover. "How?"

"His shields recharge! We'll have to... all right, I've got a crazy plan."

"Par for the course on my team. Lay it on me." Despite the fact that rockets and gunfire was all over the damn place, and they'd have to change cover soon before the crates were shredded, he was amused once more. Until she described her plan. "_That's_ your plan? Are you wearing rocket boots or something? Look at the distance!"

Kasumi gazed up and frowned. Hock was staying rather far away from any structures. "Well, do you have any better ideas?"

He stared at a row of pipes, the gunship, Kasumi, and then down at a hand wreathed in blue energy. "Just one. But you will _not_ like it."

He was right. She didn't like it. Kasumi dodged a hailstorm of fire on her way to the pipes, and as she leaped toward the gunship, Shepard extended his hand toward her and gave her a biotic push. _Craziest fucking thing I've ever... oh, you've got to be shitting me._ He was staring while Kasumi's boosted leap sent her flying onto the gunship, and she was quick to grab a hold, flashing him a look he couldn't identify. He could only chuckle and shake his head while he lifted his rifle and fired on another emerging group of mercs, throwing one off the roof with a shove before he returned his attention to Kasumi, who was flicking an insolent salute to Hock. Running out of cover, he sprinted toward her while she leaped off the gunship, and he slowed her descent with another biotic nudge.

"Let's never do that again." She pulled her pistol and exchanged a smirk with him while they raised their weapons and opened fire on the cockpit glass and the man inside who was wrestling with the controls with a scowl on his face. Like before, the armor-piercing rounds dug deep into the reinforced duraglass, and finally punched through just as Hock triggered two rockets. They had the satisfaction of seeing an explosion of red splattering the cracked windshield before they dodged for cover, two blasts putting deep gouges into the metal floor between them. This time, when he stopped rolling, Shepard grunted with satisfaction to see nothing sticking out of him. Kasumi was apparently no worse for wear, either, giving him a wide grin.

"Let's do that again!"

He could only sigh, then chuckle, then laugh before he called for a pickup while the sound of an explosion rumbled up from far below.

* * *

Shepard had escorted Kasumi to the lounge, parting with a gentle smile before he wandered the corridors in thought. He'd left the decision of what to do with the dangerous information in her old partner's greybox up to her, and she'd chosen to keep it. It was a decision he hoped neither of them would come to regret. It reminded him of another decision he'd made, though he wasn't sure if he was regretting it or not. While the council had reinstated his Spectre status, they'd also made it clear they had no interest in hearing anything about the Reapers. He found himself staring out the window in the opposite observation lounge, wondering whether a new council would have taken the threat more seriously with their predecessors dead at the hands of the abomination that attacked the Citadel. He'd never been one to fret over decisions once they'd been made, and fortunately he had few that would even tempt him to do so, but the scope of the one he'd made and the ones he might make in the future were more daunting.

He sighed and rubbed his neck when his omni-tool beeped at him, pulling up the new message. Only a hint of a smile curled his lips for a brief moment when he noticed the sender, and he opened it. The contents weren't a surprise, as Anderson had agreed to send a message apologizing for being unable to support him, but he put on a show of frowning and shaking his head while he read it, closing down the message terminal before he returned to his stargazing.

A minute later, the door hissed open. _Don't tell me she's that quick to monitor my communications._ He fought the urge to scowl at the sound of slowly approaching footsteps, clacking lightly on the deckplates.

"Commander? I trust everything was a success?"

Miranda was proving to be a curious one. She was adept at combat and office work, intelligent and perceptive, and she even seemed to have _some_ sense of humor, but he'd seen little else in her other than her dedication to Cerberus and to their mission. Jacob, at least, had a sense of duty supported by honor and not simply blind idealism. He nodded as 'his' XO stepped up beside him. "Yes. Hock's in pieces and isn't a threat to the Alliance anymore. I'll be expecting another medal any day now." He put a dry, bitter note in his voice and folded his arms, turning to lean against the glass of the window and gaze at her.

She nodded and gave him a small frown. "I take it Councilor Anderson couldn't be of much help?"

He sighed and shook his head. "He's Councilor, not Prime Minister, and there's limits on his pull with the Alliance, but you'd figure humanity's representative would be in a position to offer _some_ help. I guess we'll have to be satisfied with the Council reinstating my Spectre status."

"It's the least they could do after you saved their lives." She rolled her eyes and gazed out the window while he wondered whether she was being genuine or putting on her own little theatre. It was all frustrating, but a part of him wanted to chuckle at the irony that he'd put a soldier in a politcal job, and now it felt as if he was playing the same game.

"Yeah, well. Jacob mentioned some armor upgrades, and Garrus forwarded me the specs on those cannons. If we're lucky, the Council will let us use a drydock for that work. We might have to repaint a few spots on the hull beforehand, though."

Miranda smirked at the sight of his grin and shrugged her shoulders. "I'm sure the Illusive Man wouldn't object to that. We don't exactly have an advertising campaign."

Chuckling, he pushed off the window and patted her shoulder. "Don't worry, Miranda. If he puts one together, I'm sure he'd use you as the model." He smirked at the sight of the faint blush that rose to her cheeks and headed for the door. "I'm going to beat up on Garrus for a while. Enjoy your evening."

When the doors closed behind Shepard, Miranda found herself chuckling and shaking her head.

* * *

_Shepard,_

_ Talk about long shifts! One of the new engineers fresh from Pilgrimage accidentally installed an eezo capacitor backwards and nearly blew us up. Well, actually, we wouldn't have blown up, but we would have been cleaning eezo up for a week. Don't ask me what he was thinking, because I know even you learned how to install capacitors in your __Alliance training. ...Right? Maybe you shouldn't answer that._

_ We leave in four days for our mission. I admit I'm excited, but only because when it's done, I'll get to see Garrus and Chakwas again. And Joker. I feel like I'm forgetting someone. Hm. Oh! Your fish, too! I still can't believe you sold a poor fish to be gobbled up by a krogan. If it wasn't for that, I'd be excited to see you, too._

_ Fine, I'll admit it. It was wonderful getting to speak with you live. If we get another chance before the mission, bring the others by to say hello. Which reminds me... Liara sent me a message and she was worried about you. She said you hadn't replied to one she sent you a few days ago. It feels a little strange relaying messages, but perhaps you should ease her worries. With Wrex being busy, Ashley off on missions, and Garrus having been busy on Omega, I think it's been lonely for her._

_ I'm back in my quarters, so I'll spare you a long, rambling message. Keep Garrus out of trouble, and please avoid getting vorcha blood all over your armor again. Two decon cycles to get the smell off drains resources. Yes, I'm a quarian. Deal with it, or I won't fix up your junker of a ship._

_ I think I'll watch a vid before I go to sleep. Humans have some interesting ones. Talk to you later!_

_Miss you,_

_Tali_

Shepard leaned back in his chair and smiled over at the fish tank, ignoring the dull ache in his ribs from where Garrus had landed a solid blow. He was certain that the turian was massaging a sore mandible down in the main battery. As he pulled up a window to reply, he idly wondered what she'd be watching. Science fiction? Adventure? Romance?

Halfway across the galaxy, Tali glanced back at the cloth that covered the entrance to her quarters before she pulled up a window on her omni-tool. _Are you sure you want to upgrade to the Deluxe Edition?_

She clicked 'Yes'.

* * *

** Author's note:**

_ Sorry, Tali. Couldn't resist._


	15. Release the, uh, krogan

"And here I thought we were done with shitholes," Shepard grumbled, stepping over the body of a dead Blue Suns merc. Why the idiots didn't get the message that they couldn't stop him or his squad, he didn't know, but his amusement at their stupidity had faded rapidly when they were attacked by crazed krogan. Korlus was turning out to be a giant pain in the ass, a maze of rusted ship bulkheads and ruined parts. A quarian salvager's paradise, but little else.

"At least Noveria was nice and sterile. Cold, but clean."

Garrus was the optimist? This was a new one. "You're forgetting all the rachni acid and blood."

"Still can't believe you two fought rachni... goddamn, doesn't this bitch ever shut up?" Zaeed grumbled when the woman's voice came over the loudspeakers again, exhorting her troops to prove themselves and kill.

"She's all yours when we find her, Zaeed."

"Appreciate that, Shepard. More krogan!"

They dove aside when an insane krogan fired an explosive blast from a rather large shotgun. He would have smiled at the memory of teaching Tali that trick, except he rolled onto a sticky puddle of half-dried blood. Yeah, not a memory he wanted to associate with the lovely quarian. "Kill that fucking krogan already, Garrus."

"Don't rush me." The turian replied dryly right before he pulled the trigger and his Mantis round blew through the krogan's helmet. The lumbering figure had been in mid-charge, and it stumbled and rolled off the catwalk to fall into the cavern below.

"Took you long enough," Zaeed grumbled while he and Shepard rose and took point, rounding a corner to nearly stumble into another krogan, whose shotgun's muzzle was glowing. The scarred merc went flying from Shepard's shove as the commander lashed out with a glowing blue fist, knocking the shotgun upward. The carnage blast it had been charging went off right into its own face, and the explosion showered Shepard with blood.

Garrus almost chuckled, but his old friend now looked seriously pissed while orange fluids dripped down his face. Growling, Shepard yanked a flexible tube from the neck of his armor and sprayed down his face with some of the energy drink Mordin had built into his suit, spitting before he started moving again.

* * *

Shepard took a last glance back at the krogan that was walking away, shaking his head in disbelief. Why a crazed, cloned krogan only a few days old would bother helping them, he had no idea, but he wasn't going to look a gift lizard in the mouth.

"You know, we could have just recruited that one and called it a day, Shepard."

The commander chuckled but Zaeed beat him to the reply. "Right, because all we need is a goddamn tank-grown crazed krogan who rants on about 'the voice'." Zaeed spat as they made their way down an incline, and none of them blinked when a couple of mercs rushed out firing only to be gunned down by a pair of concussive shots and a biotic throw. "Don't know about you, but between me and the little thief, you've got enough crazy on your crew."

Smirking, Shepard shrugged and peered around the corner, ducking back as rounds ripped into the metal. "You can never have enough crazy, Massani." And with that, he sprinted through the door with an extended blue hand, putting up a barrier that gave them about two seconds to get to cover before it faded out and the commander dove behind a pile of junk with a pant. He'd been experimenting more and more with his biotics in combat, and while pulls and throws were simple enough, the barrier was still difficult. He'd had no luck learning any other tricks, such as singularities or the warp, and had found himself wishing Liara was around when he was practicing on his free time down in the hangar bay.

"You're still lousy at that, Shepard," Garrus drawled as he reloaded. "I took two hits on my shields."

"Move faster." Shepard leaned out of cover and emptied his clip into as Zaeed and Garrus did the same, armor-piercing rounds digging through thin cover to tear into the hiding mercs, who fell with screams. As the trio passed, Zaeed finished the survivors with a pair of shots and a quiet, cruel chuckle. He'd done it on Omega and here with equal delight, and not for the first time Shepard wondered just what the merc's history was with the Blue Suns.

* * *

Tank-grown krogan, crazed and vicious. An entire company of suicidal mercenaries. The whole experience had been a combination of Virmire and Omega, except this time, he put a bullet into Rana Thanoptis, who had been working with Okeer to train his tank-bred krogan, and the mastermind of the breeding program was a krogan himself. Although Shepard wasn't certain this one was any more mentally stable than Saren had been, as the old warlord ranted about letting thousands die in a clutch and the usual krogan bluster.

"Right. You'll make the genophage obsolete with one soldier. Gotcha." Shepard rolled his eyes, earning a hard, narrow-eyed stare from the previous raving warlord, but the human ignored it. "Now, tell me what you know about the Collectors."

Okeer stared at Shepard for a long moment, but the human didn't flinch, though the grizzled mercenary and the scarred turian behind him took a harder grip on their weapons. Finally, the krogan chuckled and shook his head. "Perhaps there is some krogan in you." Shepard could swear the warlord looked amused. "I gave them many krogan in exchange for the knowledge I gained to create my legacy. This-"

_"Attention! We've traced the release of the krogan! Okeer, of course!"_

As the woman on the loudspeaker blathered on, three men sighed and a krogan narrowed angry eyes out a window. When the gas began to vent into the room, all but Okeer were on their way to the door to put a bullet in the loudmouthed bitch.

Naturally, she had other ideas. And she was a pain in the ass, as Zaeed would put it, as he yelled out obscenities at her while he and Garrus fired on the krogan that kept pouring out of tanks. How they were already armed and armored, neither had any idea, but they were fortunately stupid enough to stay out of cover and absorb bullets while Shepard distracted Jedore and the YMIR mech. For his part, the commander couldn't understand how the walking tanks were all over the damned place. Lazarus Station (albeit through a window), Freedom's Progress, Omega, Bekenstein, and now here? _The galaxy is fucked if the Reapers are half as numerous as these fucking things._ His muttered curses would have done Zaeed proud as he dove behind cover while a rocket from Jedore and another from the YMIR shot overhead.

"Spirits, Shepard, keep your ass in cover! I'm not consoling a crying quarian again!"

Shepard ignored Garrus and peered around cover at the YMIR, who was fully focused on him. He knew Garrus and Zaeed could handle the krogan. As he gazed past the mech at Jedore, who was reloading her rocket launcher, he imagined what it would be like to land a solid punch right into her teeth in the middle of one of her rants. The thought left a vicious grin on his lips, but the sound of the YMIR firing a rocket at his relatively thin cover stole that moment of mirth. Leaping over the cover, he rolled to the side as the rocket impacted and the shrapnel tore chunks out of the wall. But there, in a crouch, he saw Jedore smirking at him from six meters away with her rocket launcher aimed at him.

"Good riddance... Shepard."

It wasn't the first time he'd stared down certain death. The first time, it had been true, his life had flashed before his eyes... in a way. While he was sliding down a slope toward a sheer cliff and a drop of two hundred feet on one of those damned moons he'd had a training course on – he couldn't remember the name – he'd practically relived a day a year before the Mindoir attack when they'd enjoyed their traditional springtime feast outside the house. Or so it had felt at the time. Kaidan had been the one who'd caught him just in time, with straining biotics that had left the L2 biotic with a crippling headache. Shepard had risked his company commander's wrath by leaving his platoon in the hands of his senior NCO so he could scrounge up some painkillers for the man who'd become a friend and the conscience of his decision-making process.

The part of his mind that was working at incomprehensible speeds briefly wondered why that memory had chosen to surface while the merc captain's finger was tightening on the finger of her rocket launcher, but another part already knew he couldn't get his rifle up in time. On instinct, his entire body flared with a blue aura as he lashed out at Jedore, and he was subconsciously aware that she'd fired, but when he regained his senses, he was watching her slide down a wall ten feet away, her head lolling unnaturally while blood trickled from her nose, mouth, and eyes and a red smear like that from a paintbrush remained on the wall from where her head had rubbed downward.

Of course, the YMIR didn't give him time to ponder the situation, and he heard the unmistakable sound of its chaingun roaring, knowing it was firing at him. His comm implant had been blaring at him that his shields were down, but he didn't feel any impacts while he dove behind cover, hearing Garrus and Zaeed shouting his name as their rifles stole the mech's attention.

_What the fuck...?_ He took a moment to scan his form, but found only one puncture, feeling the hot pain across his chest from a glancing shot that had skimmed under his shoulder plating and tore his skin. Shaking it off, he turned his attention to the YMIR, which was pouring fire and advancing on Garrus and Zaeed's position.

"We're out of clips, Shepard! Do something, goddamnit!"

The grizzled merc's voice made him chuckle and he vaulted over his cover, sprinting up behind the mech and leaping atop it like he had with the one in Hock's garage. Once again, he put the muzzle of his rifle to the mech's head, but he quickly remembered what Kasumi had told him, and so he tossed his Mattock and reached down, grabbing hold of the cranial unit and straining with a growl and a flare of biotics. The head tore free two seconds later and he leaped off, landing in a roll while the mech's body sparked and fell to the ground with a crash. Grabbing his rifle, he glanced over at Zaeed and Garrus, who were staring. "...What?"

"Remind me never to piss you off, Shepard. Goddamn." Zaeed muttered, but he was soon laughing while Garrus just stared. He'd witnessed Jedore's death, and now he was wondering just what the hell Cerberus had done to his friend.

* * *

No one was a fan of popping the top on the krogan soda, as Joker had put it, but Shepard had to admit that he was damned curious. Wrex had been a friend and in invaluable member of the original Normandy crew, but he was also a mature and experienced krogan with powerful biotics. This new one, well. Okeer certainly had bred a lot of insane krogan before dubbing this one perfect. And he'd proceeded to die choking on gas instead of simply stepping out of the damned room, so his sanity was in question. Still, as Shepard applied a coat of black paint to the Kodiak with a sprayer, he wondered just what this 'perfect' krogan would turn out to be. He was too lost in thought to hear Garrus approach until something clanked. Turning, he saw his turian friend sitting on a crate, gesturing to the one beside it with a large bottle of levo beer waiting.

"Drink up, Shepard. When you're wasted, you can tell me just what you did to Jedore."

Disarming the sprayer, he set it down and pulled off his breathing mask while he took a seat and uncapped the beer, arching a brow at his friend. "What do you mean? I hit her with a biotic throw. Nothing I haven't done before." Shrugging, he took a sip of the beer, enjoying the chill that soothed his raw throat. The breathing masks tended to filter out every drop of humidity as well.

"What?" Shepard met Garrus' gaze, finding the turian staring at him intently and shaking his head. "You did more than that. Here, look." While the commander looked on curiously, Garrus pulled up his omni-tool recording and played back the section where he'd dived out of cover and ended up crouching six meters from Jedore. She spoke, and it was only a half second later that she'd fired, but there was a brilliant streak of blue and a deeper flash before the merc captain went flying as if she'd been struck by a rocket herself... and Shepard was standing in her place.

The commander blinked hard. "...What the fuck?"

"Yeah, that was my question."

As far as questions went, it was certainly one of the more interesting ones he'd had.

* * *

Miranda looked just as surprised as Garrus, but she quickly chuckled with an odd satisfaction and pulled out a datapad, tossing it over her desk to him, instructing him to simply read. And so he'd returned to his cabin, thoughts of the tank in the cargo bay forgotten while he studied the detailed descriptions of the L5n biotic implant's capabilities. As he read, his brows just kept arching higher and higher. Half an hour later, the datapad was sitting on his desk while Shepard stared down at his hand, summoning a brief glow of blue before he shook his head and gazed over at the bottle of wine sitting on the table by the couch. Tempting, but not strong enough. Sighing, he rose and ran a hand back through his hair with a shake of his head. They'd be at the prison Purgatory in two days, leaving him with tomorrow to catch up on a CO's paperwork, figure out how to recreate that biotic charge, and chat with Tali for the last time before she went off on her mission.

A sigh escaped his lips at the thought of that one. He hadn't asked her to tell him where she was going, but she knew he'd desperately wanted to, just in case. But despite the admirals' trust in him – relatively speaking – he knew they'd be incensed if a Cerberus-flagged ship showed up at their top secret mission site to play watchdog. Sure, with stealth capability they wouldn't know they were there... unless they were in trouble. In which case...

"Goddamnit," Shepard cursed at the fish tank, hands tightening into fists. He was rapidly losing patience at the game he had to play with Cerberus, and now the quarians' enmity toward the terrorist organization was making it almost impossible to safeguard the woman he...

He cursed again and resisted the urge to punch the fish tank. His temper hadn't been this bad in years. And now Garrus and Joker were off watch and doubtlessly asleep. Cracking his knuckles, he stormed out of his room and into the elevator, hitting the button for deck four. There was at least one dilemma he could resolve, one way or another.

* * *

"You're one big son of a bitch, aren't you?" Shepard murmured the question while he stared at the silver-armored krogan through glass and clear, bubbling liquid. It looked asleep, but certainly not peaceful. A kindred spirit at the moment. Snorting with amusement, he reached for the button to open the tank.

_"Shepard, Cerberus protocol is very clear regarding untested alien tech-"_

"I'm the commander of this ship, EDI. I'll take your advice when you feel it necessary, but don't ever bother me about Cerberus protocol again."

_"Understood, Shepard. I am prepared to seal off the deck and sound general quarters if you are snapped in half."_

Apparently, even the AI had learned how to read the tone of his voice. And it seemed to have some concept of humor, at least. With a smirk, he pressed the button. "Thank you, EDI."

While he watched the liquid begin to drain from the tank, he idly wondered if EDI would start piping ominous organ music through the comm. Fortunately, none came, and he wouldn't be caught laughing like an idiot when a newborn perfect krogan woke up. He really should have strapped on his armor and weapons for this, but there was little time to spend dwelling on that, as the tank opened... and so did a pair of light blue eyes, blinking as the krogan coughed up lungfuls of fluids and fell heavily onto his knees outside the tank. He matched Wrex in size, but when those eyes reopened, they held a dangerous instinct that Wrex had always kept under control. Before he could say a word, the krogan roared and charged, slamming him into the wall with a massive forearm pressed to his throat. His cybernetic implants had been entertaining before, but this time he blessed them as lifesavers when his sternum and ribs didn't crack.

"Human. Male. Before you die, I need a name."

The voice was a deep, growling timbre like Wrex's, but the eyes lacked the same cunning. At the moment, however, Shepard's only real concern was the flexed muscles that were at his throat, and how to decipher a newborn krogan that carried the knowledge a madman wanted him to have. On impulse, he slipped a hand between them and gave the silver armor a biotic push as he growled in effort, and six hundred pounds or more of krogan went stumbling back into the empty tank. "My name is Shepard, and I kill anyone who threatens me." As the krogan growled and rose back to his feet, Shepard was walking toward him, fists glowing blue. "So far that's included a rogue Spectre, hundreds of geth, and a hundred of your kind."

Pale blue eyes stared hard at azure for a long moment before the krogan chuckled. "Hmm. Maybe you're not as weak as you look. But I meant _my_ name. Okeer gave me knowledge, I know things, but not a name." Shepard arched a brow while he watched the krogan adopt a contemplative expression, muttering to himself. " 'Warlord', 'Legacy', 'Grunt'... hmmm. Grunt. It has no meaning. It will do." The krogan – Grunt – narrowed his eyes and stared at Shepard for a long moment, who was regarding him with folded arms.

_Hope this doesn't turn into a staring contest._

* * *

Fortunately, it didn't, but Grunt had little to add to the conversation after he'd finished sizing up Shepard. Apparently, he'd either decided his odds weren't good, or his words had convinced the krogan that he'd find some good fights by the commander's side. Of course, Grunt had stared intently down into the hangar bay, watching Shepard's every move while the commander pounded on the heavy bag and slammed it repeatedly with biotic force, his face growing into a deeper scowl after each hit. That charge maneuver he'd pulled off on Jedore had proven difficult to repeat, and Miranda and Jacob had arrived in time to watch his efforts. Neither had much to say about the subject, being L3s, and their helpful advice hadn't led to any results, a frustrating fact that led to Shepard challenging them both to spar.

"Damn, Commander, you hit hard even when you pull your punches." Jacob rubbed his armored torso, but he was grinning while he extended a hand and pulled Miranda and Shepard to their feet. He'd swept her legs out from under her, but Jacob had kicked out the back of the commander's knee and dumped him unceremoniously onto the floor. Shepard had been pleasantly surprised to find that both of them were quite adept in hand-to-hand, though there wasn't much call for it. What Miranda lacked in strength, she made up for with reaction time and agility, and Jacob's formidable knowledge was augmented by his biotics and his finely honed body.

"Miranda turned me into a cheater." Shepard chuckled and walked over to pick up his drink, taking a long sip while they did the same, all three gazing up at the window where Grunt was still watching.

"It looks like you made quite the first impression." Miranda still appeared uncomfortable at the sight of the krogan but she didn't let it bother her while she retied her hair behind her head.

"Yeah, and now I've got a krogan watching my every mood and not just an AI." Shepard frowned at that and turned toward Miranda. "Speaking of that, how many surveillance devices are in my cabin, and what kind?"

"I'm not authorized to reveal-"

"You know the deal I made with the Illusive Man. We share a mission, but not a command. This is _my_ ship. Answer the question." Jacob looked on impassively, stifling a chuckle at Miranda's unease and the weight she shifted between legs.

"Three video and the usual audio pickups."

Shepard nodded and drained his drink, tossing it into a waste receptacle. "Send their locations to Mordin. I want them removed within the hour. Same goes for the crew quarters. And please make sure I don't find any that escaped notice."

Miranda hesitated for a moment before she sighed and nodded. "Very well, commander."

Shepard chuckled and gazed over at the opening elevator doors, watching Garrus and Zaeed stretching and cracking knuckles. Apparently they had the same idea. "I don't want to hear any objections from you or the Illusive Man. He gets to keep you as his eyes and ears, and we both know you don't miss a thing." He gave Miranda a wry grin for a moment. "Doesn't mean I wouldn't like to sing horribly off-key in the shower without being spied on."

Jacob and Miranda shared a quiet laugh at the thought while Shepard waved Garrus and Zaeed over, expecting some sort of match to be set up.

* * *

_"Keelah, what did you do now? You're all bruised!"_

Mordin had announced the cabin free of bugs and made a modification to EDI's little holoterminal to prevent the AI from activating the audio pickups without being acknowledged, and he'd promptly left while humming the same damned tune Shepard couldn't place. The good news was that it was upbeat and not depressing. The better news was that he could call Tali before she went to sleep. Sometimes he was still amazed that galactic society functioned when different species were on different day lengths and functioning hours.

"I'm fine, Tali. Just some sparring. A little four on one to get the blood pumping." He grinned encouragingly despite the bruises on his cheeks, but her arms promptly folded across her chest while she stared at the screen. He resisted the urge to sigh. "I already have a mother. I don't need two. Besides, I didn't spar the krogan." _Crap. Mom. I still need to see her._

_"You'd better not. The-"_

"The stink, I know." He shifted into a more comfortable position on the couch, wincing at a sore rib where Zaeed had landed a hard knee. "But this one hasn't been out of his tank long enough to develop a stench." Tali just stared for a moment, and he continued with a chuckle. "He's a genetically engineered 'perfect' krogan. I, ah, 'birthed' him just a few hours ago. First thing he did was charge me and slam me into the bulkhead before I returned the favor."

* * *

Tali sighed and slid onto her stomach on her sleeping mat, folding her arms in front of her while she shook her head at the screen. "Really, Shepard, you can't go one day without doing something insane, can you?"

_"Not really. I try, but it never works out." _She watched as he slid onto his own bed, laying his head back on a pillow while he gazed up at the screen projected over his forearm. His bed certainly looked comfortable... and large. And... _"Tali?"_

"Hm? Oh. Sorry." She hoped he didn't notice her blush through the comm link, but the twitch of his lips answered that question. "I was distracted. I, um, remembered that I need to check my shotgun's power cell before I leave tomorrow, and-"

_"Uh huh."_

Damn that subtle little grin of his. It was annoying and attractive at the same time, and always made it feel like he knew something she didn't want him to know. Fortunately, she'd already triple checked to make sure the unique encryption their omni-tools shared couldn't be used to hack into hers... not that he could ever figure out how. He understood tech operations well enough but was hopeless when it came to code and hacking. It figured. She'd fallen for a human who couldn't engineer his way out of a hole even if he had the Neema's entire inventory of spare parts at his feet. Grinning wide, she answered his tease with her own, tilting her head at him. "Do you even know how to check the charge on a power cell?"

His smirk gave her a little thrill of victory even before he replied. _"I'm not __**that**__ clueless, Tali. I can even describe how the Normandy's stealth system worked."_

"Maybe, but that doesn't mean you'd have _any_ idea how to repair it..."

_"Oh, that part's easy. You just find a gorgeous quarian girl and give her some data on the geth, and she'll do anything you ask her to."_

Bah. She felt her cheeks heating up again despite her wide smile at the compliment. And that damn grin was back on his lips. Well, there was a way around that one. She put a coy tone into her voice. "Not _anything_." Rolling over onto her back, she slipped her free forearm behind her head and stretched in an arch, her eyes narrowing to slits behind her visor. She had the satisfaction of seeing his grin vanish and his eyes wander off hers and she suppressed a laugh. "Shepard? You look distracted all of a sudden."

_"What? Oh. Sorry, I just remembered that you need to check the charge on your __shotgun's power cell."_ They both shared a laugh, but she was grinning behind her visor at the faint color on his cheeks.

* * *

**Author's note:**

_ Sorry for the slow update. Got caught up in another story for a while, then did something to my neck, and decided to take a mental vacation and play video games. Since I started writing back in late June, I've barely touched a game.  
_

_ Little of this chapter excited me. It's been harder than I expected writing the first few recruitment missions, since I didn't want to just gloss over them, but neither did I have any good ideas for a complete rewrite of them. Horizon and Haestrom are the ones I'm looking forward to, and while I'll have to rewrite the huge chunk that's already written for Haestrom and after due to some minor plot changes, it'll stay mostly intact. _

_ I enjoyed writing Shepard's stumbling into his ability to charge. Considering that he's such a badass in the games, and should be a badass, it's fun to write those moments where he's sitting there scratching his head saying 'What the hell just happened?' Perhaps Liara will one day despair at the thought of him ever successfully learning to create a singularity._

_ Writing Grunt's awakening was a pain in the ass. I hate pulling stuff verbatim from the games, but neither could I think of anything really interesting to do with it, since I really enjoy that meeting as it stands in the game. He'll be one of my favorites to write once he's more familiar with Shepard, though, and I think you'll enjoy a good bonding moment they have coming up in a few chapters. It'll leave Garrus incensed at the commander. Looking forward to posting that chapter. Been looking forward to it since I first published.  
_

_ It occurs to me that I haven't written much from other characters' points of view aside from when they're interacting with Shepard. It's on my mind and on the list of things to correct._

_ Thanks again for the reviews and follows. I'll try not to let a couple of weeks go by again without an update._


	16. Prison break

** Author's note:**

_This one flowed out in about five hours, which was nice. I enjoyed writing it. More from other perspectives, lots of dialogue, some action. Hope you enjoy._

_ Horizon is next, followed by Thane, then Samara, then LotSB, then Overlord, then... just kidding. Haestrom's after Horizon._

* * *

"Spirits!"

Shepard chuckled when he heard an untranslated turian curse and the banging metal of a dropped tool on the deckplate, leaning against the doorway to the forward battery. "Garrus, you said you were calibrating, not cracking your skull open."

The turian peered out from under the forward cannons and huffed, mandibles twitching in irritation. "Whoever designed the access hatches for these things should be shot. Twice. In the ass. Not to mention it's a tight fit under here."

"You could, oh I don't know, remove your armor?"

"On a Cerberus ship?" Garrus scoffed. "You'd have better luck getting Wrex out of his armor or Tali out of her..." The turian fought a snicker at the arch of Shepard's brow. Usually that was a bad sign, but being an old friend had its advantages. "Heh. I'm not going to ask how you plan on overcoming _that_ obstacle." Garrus decided to wriggle back beneath the cannon when another black brow arched.

"Good idea." Shepard tried not to dwell on that problem despite the slight frown on his face, but he shook it off after a moment. "We'll be at Purgatory in two hours, unless you have a prior engagement." He heard the turian hum in contemplation beneath the cannon.

"It's just a prisoner pickup. I'll stay here and start working on those upgrades."

"Garrus, how the hell did you manage to get full schematics for a prototype Turian weapon? And why don't you feel like a traitor arming a Cerberus ship with them?" Those two questions had been bugging him since the turian had dropped by the day before with the blueprints for the new cannons, which were currently being fabricated in the hangar bay under Donnelly's supervision. Shepard took a seat on his customary crate and peered at the shadowed turian who'd stopped his wriggling beneath the cannon with a sigh.

"Well, one of my old contacts mistakenly thought I was a Spectre and forwarded them to me to review. I didn't have the heart to tell him the truth." They shared a chuckle, but Garrus was quiet again quickly, pausing again. "As for arming Cerberus? Honestly, they'll get their hands on the specs soon enough, one way or another. Might as well use them to save our asses."

They both laughed again and Shepard shook his head, standing. "Can't say I'm not looking forward to meeting up with that Collector ship again. Try not to snap off your fringe under there. I'm going to check on-"

"Me?" The playful female voice came out of nowhere along with a hard pat of Shepard's shoulder, but he was already smirking in her direction, and Kasumi reappeared with a pout. "That's the third time I haven't been able to surprise you. How do you do that?"

He only shrugged and smiled while Garrus chuckled from under the cannon. "Shepard attracts trouble. He has a sixth sense for it."

Actually, the real explanation was far more mundane, but he simply kept smiling and stepped around her. "That's as good an explanation as any. You two have fun. I'm going to make sure Grunt hasn't eaten Mordin."

Garrus groaned silently beneath the cannon while Kasumi hopped down onto the ventral hatch and lay on her back beside him. "Hey, Archangel! What're you up to?"

The turian sometimes wondered if Shepard sent the talkative young woman his way just to be a bastard. And as Kasumi began speaking about wriggling through tight spaces on one heist or another, Garrus became certain of the answer to that question.

* * *

Grunt was an odd combination of talkative and grumpy silence. Another thing that reminded him of Wrex. And so he found himself in the armory, working beside Jacob to install heavier mass drivers in the assault rifles. The Cerberus lieutenant was a difficult man to dislike, he'd discovered. They'd both been Alliance soldiers who saw their share of combat and spent a lot of time aboard ships, they were both biotics of relatively simple talent, and they both hated red tape and enjoyed a dark beer. But still, it was hard to get past the fact that he'd voluntarily joined Cerberus despite their history and reputation, no matter how honest he'd been to his new commander about his reservations. Still, he was a straight talker who knew his weapons, and his input came more from the heart than Miranda's, which was often completely lacking in anything but logical considerations. Not to mention the conversations were usually less serious.

"Yeah, so then we drop out of FTL right into the middle of a shootout between two turian frigates and a swarm of terminus pirate scum. The turians take a shot at us but miss, and even after we started firing on the pirates, the damn birds were _still_ shooting at us." Jacob shook his head while Shepard chuckled and finished reassembling a Vindicator. "Really don't know what that captain was thinking. We had to maneuver behind the other turian frigate to keep the first from firing at us, and we were _still_ firing at pirates."

"The captain must have forgotten to tell his gunnery officer to remove you from his target board. I remember one time after I got my N7 designation we had a joint training mission with some turian commandos." Shepard grabbed another rifle and started field stripping it while Jacob gave him his full attention. "Good troops, but I started figuring out why we were so successful against them in the First Contact War. We swapped half our ranks, so my XO for this mission was their own. At one point I ordered him to hold the left flank with his platoon while we advanced." Shepard chuckled, and a knowing grin began to form on Jacob's lips. "Wasn't until an hour later, when we were hopelessly pinned down, that I realized I hadn't explicitly qualified my statement like they were used to." They both laughed while the commander shook his head. "Upside was they'd dug us some very nice positions while they were waiting, and the next day's exercise was outstanding once I remembered to be more specific. They're great soldiers, but we're a lot more flexible. My mother has a similar story from when she did a joint exercise as the XO of one of their cruisers." He cursed inwardly again, realizing it had been ten days since he'd awakened and he _still_ hadn't spoken to his mother.

"She's the captain of the Orizaba, right? Must be nice, being the boss." Jacob smirked down at the Mattock he was upgrading while Shepard put his Vindicator back in the rack. "My father was a captain. Long-haul transport, though, nothing glamorous."

Shepard was tempted to ask about the past tense, but the lieutenant's face had tightened a bit, so he just nodded and brought his own Mattock over to the workbench. "Anyone waiting for you back home?"

Jacob shook his head. "Only child, parents are gone. Never settled down. You? Other than your mother, I mean?"

"An aunt, my mother's sister, back on Earth. Edinburgh. A couple of cousins." Shrugging, he installed the upgraded mass driver. "Only met them twice, last time when I was... thirteen, I think. One day my mother will drag me off to visit them again, I'm sure."

Jacob chuckled and exchanged the finished rifle for another. "Don't let Donnelly know. He'd probably demand to go with you and take you on a tour of distilleries and castles."

"Nah, he's a pureblood. I'm just a mutt." Shepard grinned and tugged at a stubborn driver for a moment before he realized the damn barrel was bent from a blow he'd given a krogan, hard enough to crack its brow plate. He tore the barrel loose with a scowl and tossed it into a pile of scrapped components while Jacob arched a brow with amusement.

"So no settling down? I keep seeing Garrus snickering at you while you're typing on your omni-tool."

"That damned turian is a bigger gossip than a teenage girl," Shepard growled, slipping a new barrel onto his rifle. He didn't volunteer any more, though, and Jacob let it go with a grin at his commander's irritation.

* * *

Tali cursed as the crate she was dragging bounced off her heel again. Letting it go, she gave it a firm kick before Kal'Reegar walked up and grabbed it with a chuckle. "I'll take it, ma'am. Can't have you breaking the radiation sensors or whatever this stuff is."

"Maybe not, but it'd be fun."

Kal suppressed a smile behind his visor to keep the amusement out of his voice. "Everything all right, ma'am? You've been kind of irritated since the Admiralty bumped our mission up a day. It's not like we're not already prepared for it." That was true enough. They'd been ready for two days due to Dholen's erratic emissions, and its radiation output was calculated to be high enough to mask them from geth sensors in two days. Haestrom's turbulent magnetosphere would do the rest. Or so Xen and the other scientists hoped. Most of it was technobabble he didn't understand, quarian or not.

Tali hesitated for a moment while she walked with him toward the shuttle, then shrugged and answered with a touch of sadness in her voice. "I was going to talk with someone later. It's not a big deal."

"I'm sure he'll understand," Kal replied with kind conviction in his voice. He still wanted to grin, though.

To his surprise, Tali just shrugged again and hopped up into the shuttle, reaching down to take the crate. "I know. Let's just get this loaded so I can send him a last message."

"Keelah, don't say 'last' message. We're heading for Haestrom, not Tuchanka." He had the satisfaction of hearing Tali laugh as she stowed the crate and he finally allowed himself to grin.

* * *

Shepard scanned the message on his omni-tool as the decontamination cycle came to an end, frowning. Miranda caught the expression, as she always did. She'd been surprised at how little he hid his emotions around the crew. He did it nearly as well as she, but there was often a smile or a laugh or a scowl on his lips when he wandered the corridors speaking with someone. Lately, however, his default expression when alone seemed to be a slight frown, as if keeping himself busy was his own reprieve from... well, she wasn't sure. Yet. But she'd find out. She was equally curious about who he kept communicating with, but EDI had postulated that it would take six weeks to break the highly complex and unique encryption. That EDI would have trouble hacking it suggested it was the quarian girl he'd accompanied back to the Migrant Fleet. He hadn't replied to the asari, T'Soni, since he'd received her message, but whether that was because he had no interest or because it wouldn't be over whatever private link he had to the quarian, she wasn't sure. Shepard glanced back at her and she realized she'd been staring, but he simply arched a brow and chuckled at her, which earned him a smirk.

Miranda glanced over at the krogan while they exited the airlock and stepped onto the Puragtory's deck. She hadn't been enthused when Shepard had told... Grunt?... to grab his weapons. It was to be a rather routine prisoner transfer, after all, despite Jack's reputation for powerful biotics and criminal tendencies. Nothing she and Shepard couldn't handle by themselves, she acting as Cerberus' representative and the commander as, well, himself. Zaeed had practically invited himself for some reason, and Shepard hadn't objected, though he was surely as curious about the mercenary's motivations as she was. Motivations that became much clearer when she caught sight of the trio of guards clad in blue and white. Beside her, Zaeed's lip curled in something between a grin and a snarl, but she only hoped the man wouldn't fly off the handle and start killing. Or Grunt. The krogan had, surprisingly, noticed the expression as well, and pounded his fists together, but they were both given a hard glare by Shepard that instantly wiped the gleam from their eyes. How he did that, she didn't know, but she was jealous of it. And of his ability to instantly put those Blue Suns mercs on the defensive when he strode up to them as if he was in command here as well.

* * *

"Go to hell. I'll send you there myself."

Shepard's reply to the treacherous warden was why Zaeed had quickly come to love this job, a wide grin on the scarred face while he drew his rifle and moved to cover beside the commander. Sure, the mission was dangerous, complicated, and would probably cost half the ship their lives, but Shepard made everything so goddamned simple. If they get in the way, kill them. And so Zaeed was laughing while he and Shepard sprayed down a group of mechs that were approaching with powerful rounds from their Mattocks. "Can't believe the Suns haven't gotten the message not to fuck with us, Shepard." His eyes tracked the krogan, who roared and charged out of cover to smash a bipedal LOKI mech with his shotgun, sending it flying into a wall before he blasted a quadrupedal FENRIS point-blank and kicked another LOKI to the ground, stomping on its head with a loud crunch and a shower of sparks.

"Add Grunt to the list," Shepard commented dryly as he vaulted over cover and jogged ahead with Miranda and Zaeed to catch up to Grunt, who was already firing down the glass corridor toward an entrenched lieutenant. Between Shepard, the turian, and the krogan, Zaeed was starting to think he could take on the entire Blue Suns HQ... and win. The thought made him grin wickedly while he tossed an incendiary grenade at an opening door, showering another squad with flaming shrapnel that burned furiously through their armor as they screamed in agony.

Yeah, this was still fun, all right.

* * *

Grunt stared down at the room below, a toothy maw dropping open along with Zaeed's and Miranda's. He, too, had been expecting a dangerous-looking criminal to be thawing out of the cryostasis, but none of them had expected it to be a bald woman covered in tattoos and little else but pants, boots, and some straps. From what little knowledge the imprints had given him on other cultures (other than how to kill them), he gathered that the women were the weaker of most species. The asari were proof enough of that: a race of commandos and saboteurs, none with the strength for a stand-up fight. Sure, the Lawson woman was a good shot and had strong biotics, but... this was Jack? A small human with scarcely any muscles to speak of, who'd allowed herself to get captured?

"Jack is small," Grunt commented, kicking the lab tech who'd fired on Shepard back into unconsciousness.

"Compared to you, _I'm_ small, Grunt. But you already know better than to cross me." Shepard chuckled while he began operating the controls to wake Jack. The krogan grunted and shrugged noncommitally.

"If you keep finding me worthy battles, there'll be no need."

"I'm sure he'll keep that in mind," Miranda remarked dryly before their attention was stolen by the monitor where a close-up showed the imprisoned biotic opening and blinking her eyes. A scowl quickly formed on what would have been a beautiful face, and a few short moments later, she was ripping her arms free of the shackles with a fierce azure glow of her biotics. "Wow. That's some strength... damnit, there's two YMIRs down there." Miranda cursed and switched the camera feed to a wide view, showing two of the hulking mechs advancing on the bald prisoner, but Jack didn't seem concerned as she ripped out of her leg restraints and sprinted towards them. An extraordinarily powerful biotic force slammed into the chest of one of the mechs as she slipped inside its shield perimeter and it toppled like a tree while the other's rocket launcher spooled up and raised. A split second before it fired, its arm was smashed back, and the rocket exploded out of the muzzle right into its own head. That was when the four of them realized they were standing right above a heavy mech that was about to catstrophically explode.

"Get out!" Shepard yelled, grabbing Miranda and yanking her toward the door. Grunt felt the need to follow his lead and grabbed Zaeed, doing the same while the merc cursed furiously, and they all dove out the door a split second before the mech detonated. As the bulkheads and deck rumbled furiously, the lights went out, leaving them in darkness.

After a moment, a deep voice broke the silence. "It's dark. Just like the tank."

* * *

They weren't in darkness long before the emergency lighting came on and klaxons began to sound, and Grunt led the way again with an excited laugh. "Hurry up! I want to see how long she'll last!" Shepard could only shake his head with grim amusement. Once again they'd be wading through a swarm of mercs with the end goal being to pick up another dangerous squad member. If this kept up, there'd been no human colonies left in the Terminus and the Normandy would be out of small arms ammunition, but they'd have one hell of a ground team. He caught the disapproving frown Grunt gave him when he'd almost lazily thrown a merc off a catwalk with a biotic push. It was the first time in a while that he'd found little amusement in mowing down a horde of idiots, but Zaeed and Grunt were having the time of their lives. Until they rounded a corner and ran into a firestorm of YMIR chaingun fire that sent them diving. Fortunately, he didn't even have to glance at Miranda for her to unleash an electrical attack from her omni-tool, and he opened up on the mech alongside the krogan and the mercenary while his XO recharged her overload.

"Why aren't you charging at that mech, Grunt?" Zaeed was still irritated after being manhandled like a raw recruit, and the krogan returned his ire with a toothy smirk.

"I'm waiting for you to run out of thermal clips so I can use you as a shield."

Shepard glanced at Miranda and they shared a smirk before they rose out of cover and unloaded on the mech again, the Cerberus operative laughing when she returned to cover. That was an unexpected reaction from the controlled ice queen, and he arched a brow at her while he reloaded. "Oh, sorry, Commander. I was just wondering if you were going to run up and rip off its head like you did with the others."

"He did what? Is there video?" Grunt suddenly sounded very excited and Zaeed had to slam a fist into a meaty krogan arm to get him to keep firing.

Shepard shook his head and dashed out of cover to move around to the flank of the mech and a small squad of approaching infantry that were using it as a shield. He emptied his clip – why that expression was still in use a century after magazines had fallen out of use, he wasn't sure – into the four mercs, dropping them before he sprinted over to the mech and leaped onto it like he had before. This was becoming just another day at the office, really. This time, he fired his last few remaining shots with his muzzle pressed to the mech's head. It should have been good enough. Except he'd forgotten that he was using disruptor ammunition and not armor-piercing. As the mech suddenly turned and tilted its chaingun arm up toward him, Shepard tossed his rifle and sighed, reaching down and grabbing the head with both hands, but before he could start yanking, the gun was spinning up, aimed at his chest from half a meter away.

"Shepard!"

He was dimly aware of Miranda's alarmed yell as the gun roared, unleashing a stream of hypervelocity rounds that dropped his shields in half a second while he twisted out of the way. He felt a searing hot pain in his side and it was distracting enough for him to stumble instead of landing neatly on his feet when he jumped off the mech's back. Just in time to see the rocket arm being raised at him. He quickly grabbed the arm and his arms flared up with biotic power while he grunted and shoved the muzzle back and up, and the rocket exploded into the mech's own head just as Jack had done a few minutes before. The explosion sent him flying backward and he tasted blood when he slammed on his back onto the deck as the mech started beeping furiously. He growled at the pain in his side and a fresh protest from his knee as he scrambled to his feet and sprinted away, diving behind cover just as the mech exploded in a blast of heat and light that hurt his eyes even from behind closed lids.

A moment later, he opened his eyes to the sound of deep, uproarious laughter. Well, at least the krogan was impressed. Grimacing, he rose to his feet and looked for his Mattock, finding only a dark smear of polymer on the floor where it had been. Sighing, he pulled his Mantis from his back and started limping toward the next door while Miranda came up beside him and shot him a glare. "That tactic might need to be adjusted, Commander."

"Yeah. Just a little."

* * *

Jack's trail of devastation was impressive, and the two human biotics were shaking their heads in disbelief. Why they hadn't found the woman collapsed and exhausted on the floor already, he had no idea, but it certainly would have made things simpler. Grunt was still grinning with delight, spattered with blood from the close range he'd been engaging in after tossing Shepard his assault rifle. The commander had stuck with the Mantis, though, his twisted knee having relegated him to sniper support. It was a role he didn't mind at all while he put another round into Warden Kuril's face, and the turian blinked again when the round spent itself on his shield, dropping them. For all his boasting, the turian had backed himself into a corner. It was a corner with good cover, but he was still trapped, and he couldn't lean out to fire without receiving a heavy rifle round on his shields. And now they were down.

"Damn you, Shepard! I could have sold you and lived like a king! I could have-"

An incendiary grenade bounced off his head a split second before exploding. Zaeed and Grunt were cackling as the warden shrieked and stumbled around, burning from head to toe before he fell off the edge of his platform and landed with a sickening crunch thirty feet below. Zaeed put three more rounds into him for good measure while Grunt pounded his fists together. Shepard only sighed and gestured at them to follow while he limped toward the exit. "Nice throw, Zaeed. Let's find Jack and get out of here."

"Don't tell me you want to _leave_!" Grunt's protest was predictable, but the commander was in no mood to placate the two-day old krogan.

* * *

Shepard was a hard one to understand. The logs of the previous missions had shown him that the human enjoyed the rush of combat, and his skill and strength were undeniable, but he'd been grim and terse the entire mission. Grunt stared at the man's back, his young mind working to decipher the man, before a Mattock barked once and blasted through the faceplate of a merc that was coming up behind the small one, Jack. Injured or not, his marksmanship wasn't suffering, at least.

"Who the fuck are you?" The tatooed human snarled at them with glowing blue fists. Grunt grinned and held his shotgun a little tighter, expecting a fight. This one promised to make it interesting.

"Shepard. Spectre. You probably heard all the BS about me on the extranet." Shepard had lowered his rifle and was staring right back at the woman, his own fist glowing blue down at his side. Jack's eyes narrowed and she took a half-step forward, pointing a finger at him.

"Bullshit. He's-"

"Dead. Yeah. It wasn't fun. Now, do you want off this ship, or do you want to die sucking vacuum like I did?" Shepard was glaring at her now, and Grunt chuckled low in his throat. If they were krogan, they'd either end up ripping out each other's throats or ripping off each other's clothes.

"Just knock her out and carry her sorry ass onto the ship, Shepard," Zaeed grumbled from the side, earning Jack's cold glare and a more furious glow from her fists.

"I'd like to see you try. Who are you, anyways? A walking birth control advertisement?"

While Grunt laughed, Zaeed's scarred face twisted into a grin and he looked over at Shepard. "She'll fit right in."

"Fuck that. You're Cerberus. I'm not going anywhere with you." Jack was back to glaring daggers at Shepard, but the glow in her hands had dimmed, a fact that didn't escape his notice.

"This ship is going down in flames. I have the only way off it. Do you _really_ want to stand here and argue with me, or do you want to earn a small fortune killing Collectors?"

He could see the stunned confusion in her eyes, but she shook it off quickly and scowled, the glow on her hands fading along with his own. "Look, you want me on your little squad? Make it worth my while. I want access to any records Cerberus has on me."

Miranda stepped forward and Jack sneered at the sight of her. "Out of the question. I'm not letting some criminal-"

"Done." Shepard interrupted her and Jack grinned wickedly at the stare Miranda was giving him. "Now, can we go? I've got better things to do than stand around on a burning ship."

"Yeah, let's go." Jack turned toward the airlock with what might have been a small spring in her step, calling back over her shoulder as the doors opened for Shepard's approach. "We're going to get along just fine, cheerleader."

Miranda scowled at Shepard, who'd turned his head back to glance at her. He only shrugged and led them into the airlock while Grunt and Zaeed chuckled and spoke quietly between each other.

* * *

Shepard grimaced when he stepped into his pants. Chakwas had promised that the knee would be back to normal by tomorrow, and she was always as good as her word, but leg injuries always annoyed him to no end. At least the two rounds that had ripped through his side were relatively superficial, the muscle and skin already regenerating from a dose of medigel and covered by a waterproof bandage. Dropping into his seat with a sigh, he left his socks atop his desk and opened his terminal, shaking his head. Aside from a couple of little 'housecleaning' items like mineral surveys and a request to find some missing Cerberus operative (which was hardly a priority for him), there was nothing. They'd picked up six new squad members in a week, but there was still nothing from the Illusive Man on the Collectors. No new disappearances, no leads, no hints.

He could feel his frustration growing, but he knew it wasn't only because Tali was out of contact. So what was it? Not contacting his mother? Not being able to message Anderson? Liara? Ashley? Wrex? A combination of the above? Whatever it was, the lack of a cause was becoming as annoying as the frustration itself, and he closed his eyes to think it over. If no cause was evident, then what for a remedy? Alcohol? No. Sparring or sports? Eh. It helped, but his knee wasn't in any condition for them. Sex? He laughed aloud at the thought of a furious quarian woman chasing him around with a shotgun, but his door chimed, breaking that moment of amusement. "Enter," he grumbled loud enough for EDI to pick up, and the door hissed open to reveal Miranda, her hand already on a cocked hip while she glared at him. _No, definitely not sex._ He fought the urge to laugh and folded his arms across his chest.

"If this is about Jack's request, have a seat." He waved toward the couch on the other side of the glass display case. It had a few models in it from his visit to the Citadel, and he'd spent some time gazing between the original Normandy and the SR2, comparing their design and their size difference.

Miranda looked ready to start arguing with him right there, but she sighed and headed down the steps to take a seat, calling over her shoulder dryly. "I've seen it all before, Commander, but if you could find yourself a shirt, I'd appreciate it."

He laughed and stood, cautious with his left knee, and grabbed his socks, making his way over to his armor locker and closet. "Have you said that to our newest recruit yet?" He could practically feel Miranda's smirk on his back while he pulled out a button-up and slipped it on, ignoring the protest from his side.

"Don't tempt me."

She had indeed seen it all before, but he was a rather pleasing specimen. She could have reconstructed his scars easily enough, but she'd decided to leave him unmarked, an image of perfection... or as close to it as a genetic mutt and an Alliance soldier could get. Of course, between the Saren campaign, Elysium, Akuze, his special forces training, and going from an enlisted soldier to an officer qualified for ship command, he'd more than proven himself. Not to mention that humanity now had the trust of the council races because of the decision he'd made in the council chambers two years ago. She'd debated with the Illusive Man about that decision before, she opposing and him defending, and she'd grudgingly come to realize that trust may be as useful as power with the Reapers on their way. Maybe. She was still undecided.

"I'll tempt you with this instead." Miranda blinked and looked up, realizing she'd let her mind wander while he'd taken a seat on the other end of the couch and was holding out a glass with a few sips of wine already poured, a brow arched at her when she didn't reach for it.

"I'm sorry. Yes, thank you." She took the glass and sniffed with some surprise, recognizing the french merlot she preferred, and gave him a suspicious gaze while he poured himself a glass as well, catching her eye when he set the bottle down.

"What?"

She flicked her eyes down at the glass and smirked, but he chuckled and waved a hand. "Gardner keeps a list of everyone's favorite drinks and dishes. Glare at him, not me." He settled back in the couch and took a sip, but she was still eyeing him.

"And you just happened to remember mine?"

He gave her a wounded look and set his glass down, reaching over to grab his socks and pulling on one with a slight grimace. "Have you ever seen the amount of information Alliance officers have to memorize before they can become qualified for command? You're not the only one with an IQ higher than your... shoe size. Zaeed prefers Islay single malts, the smokier the better." He leaned back again and gestured a hand toward her. "Out with it."

She'd smirked at his hesitation before deciding on shoe size but decided not to comment, taking a sip instead, sighing quietly. The wine was a pleasant warmth on her tongue and throat... the bastard. She wasn't letting him off that easily. "You're not authorized to grant outsiders access to our records, Shepard." _Commander, damnit._ She shook her head. "We can't just give her free access to our-"

"Miranda," he interrupted, a faint smile on his lips. "What exactly did she say? 'I want access to any records Cerberus has on me'. I think 'on me' are the important words there, don't you?"

She blinked and thought back. Yes, that was true enough, though she doubted Jack meant to limit her request in such a way, and she shook her head. "She's not a turian, Shepard. She's a criminal."

He gave her an odd, curious look, leaning toward her with his glass cradled between his hands. "Not a turian? Don't tell me you were eavesdropping on my conversation with Jacob earlier."

_Oh, for the love of..._ She could feel her cheeks warming but she forced a frown to her lips and shook her head. "What are you talking about? I meant that she won't give a damn about the letter of the law, and if she think we're holding back, she might blow a hole in something or someone important."

He was laughing while he leaned back again, but at least he didn't _appear_ to be mocking her. "Don't worry about her. Just give her access to the database and tell EDI to restrict her to anything that doesn't relate to her with a note that she can come to me if she has a problem. I'll talk with her tomorrow and get on her good side... if she has one."

Miranda took a sip of wine and gave him a doubting look. "Even you have your limits, Shepard." _Commander!_

He shrugged and gave her a faint smile while he lifted his glass to his lips. "I talked a krogan battlemaster down from saving a genophage cure. Have a little faith."

That was true. She permitted herself a wry smile and opened her mouth to reply, but Joker's voice came over the comm.

_"Commander, incoming call from the Illusive Man, priority. He says another colony just went dark."_

Shepard and Miranda traded a sober gaze while they set their glasses down and made their way toward the door.

* * *

**Author's note:**

_ Been getting lazy about other characters' perspectives lately. Or so it feels to me. Doing some experimenting. Let me know what you think. Grunt's an interesting challenge, as he's physically mature but he's 99% tank imprint instead of a developed personality._

_If you think you know why Shepard's getting irritable, send me a PM. Interested in hearing the theories. Probably obvious, but ah well.  
_

_ Let me hear some feelings and preferences, damnit. You've all gotten soft on me. I enjoy praise, so keep it coming, but nobody's perfect. You think it needs more action? Needs more dialogue? Speak your piece. It's my story, so in the end I'll write it how I want, but that doesn't mean I'm not interested in considering other perspectives. Just be careful how you phrase it, or Miranda will spend a lot of time up in Shepard's cabin and Tali will bunk in a dark corner of the hangar bay... all right, maybe not. She'll bunk in the AI core. It's louder in there.  
_


	17. Facing the enemy

Councilor David Anderson allowed himself a smile when he read the reply from Hannah Shepard, confirming she'd be aboard the Citadel in six days, and quickly drafted a message to her son, wording it as an olive branch. It wasn't until he'd finished writing the short note that he shook his head at the realization that, for all his protests, he was well-adapted to playing the political game. It was a thought he didn't particularly enjoy.

He turned his attention back to the other matter of concern, trying again to initiate a comm link with Ashley Williams on Horizon. He'd had no luck four hours prior, and now as the terminal brought up an error message he felt his stomach start to clench with dread. He quickly opened a comm link to Hackett and as the admiral's yeoman went to go escort him out of a meeting, Anderson could only hope that Shepard was already on his way to the colony, cursing their agreement to act as estranged friends.

* * *

Jacob sighed as the lightweight suit of armor went flying across the armory, and as Jack glowered at him, he just threw his hands up and went back to the workbench where he was modding an Eviscerator shotgun for her. "Fine, whatever. Take it up with Shepard."

"Take what up with Shepard?" Grunt's rumbling voice sounded a bit distorted, and the two humans turned to see the krogan chewing loudly on... something crunchy. Jacob decided not to ask.

"Soldier boy here was trying to get me to wear armor." Jack scoffed and folded her arms across her chest. "As if armor's going to stop anything moving ten times the speed of sound unless it's so damn heavy you can barely move or use biotics."

Grunt laughed, a small chunk of food flying out of his maw and landing on the deck. Jacob's scowl quickly grew to epic proportions, between the crude and loud krogan and the undisciplined criminal. "My armor weighs thirty-nine kilos and it doesn't slow me down."

"You're a krogan, genius."

"Shepard's not, and his weighs fifteen kilos. He carries more weight than I do, pro... propor... what's that word?"

"Proportionately," Jacob added helpfully.

"Yeah, that."

"He's also almost as strong as a krogan." Miranda's cool voice immediately sent Jack's lips into a curl. A few hours on board, and she already loathed the 'Cerberus cheerleader', as she'd dubbed the brunette. "Get your gear ready. We have intel that says the Collectors may be on Horizon. We'll be there in three hours."

Miranda disappeared behind the door that led to the conference room and the lab before Jack could deliver an insult, leaving the biotic to vent her irritation on the human and krogan. "Damn, that figures. I haven't even slept yet and we're already going off to kill something?"

"Shepard doesn't waste any time," Grunt remarked brightly, grabbing his weapons from his locker. "It had better be the Collectors. I want blood."

Jacob could only roll his eyes while Jack shook her head and yanked her shotgun from his grasp to look it over.

* * *

"It's all hands on this one." The entire ground team was armed and armored down in the hangar bay, sitting on crates or leaning against the shuttle while they did final checks on their gear, listening to Shepard. "There's not much intel on the colony's layout. Seems they never bothered sending the Alliance a map. Expect it to be a maze of prefabs. We're going to start at the south and work our way through to the heart of the colony. I'm splitting the squad up into three teams. Grunt, Mordin, you're with me. Garrus, take Jacob and Jack. Miranda, you've got Zaeed and Kasumi."

Everyone but Jack and Grunt nodded. The convict rolled her eyes and Grunt slammed his fists together eagerly, and he had a feeling both gestures would end up being a common occurrence. After what he'd seen of Jack he'd considered leaving her on the ship. One unknown element in the Collectors was bad enough, but two? Still, the carnage she'd unleashed in Purgatory was impressive, and he had a feeling Garrus' calm demeanor and wry sarcasm might put her at ease, if there was any to be found. Garrus' unease was obvious and surprising, however, but he put that aside to be addressed later.

"What're the priorities, Commander?" Miranda inquired, and the question put a slight frown on Shepard's lips where he stood with folded arms.

"If it's the Collectors, engaging them and gathering intel are at the top. Survivors second. Chakwas is standing by in our second shuttle to provide medical assistance, but if it's Collectors we're dealing with, we'll have enough on our hands." He turned to Mordin, who'd been attaching small devices to everyone's armor or belts, and the salarian took the cue.

"Countermeasure should provide protection from seeker swarms. Theoretical, given limited data, but confidence high... in limited numbers. Avoid larger swarms, can't guarantee anything in that case."

Many eyes traded glances, but Shepard only laughed. "Even geniuses give disclaimers on new products, it seems. We've got two hours, so go catch some shut-eye. Dismissed."

Garrus remained behind with Shepard as the elevator doors closed behind the rest of the squad, and he looked at his old friend for a moment before speaking with uncharacteristic hesitation. "Are you sure you want me leading one of the teams, Shepard? Jacob could do it."

The commander fixed him with a disappointed stare, shaking his head. "Haven't we been over this, Garrus? You're not a mind reader. You kept an entire squad alive on Omega for almost a year and tore up half the mercs on the station."

"Yeah, but-"

Shepard cut him off coldly, his voice hard. "I don't want to hear it. You're a turian, not a batarian. Stop making excuses and do your damn job, or go back to Omega." Garrus' mandibles twitched in anger and his fingers curled, but Shepard ignored them and walked off without another word, leaving the turian to stare at the elevator doors with a growl in his throat.

* * *

She'd been in some tough spots before, but this... this was something else. She'd never been trapped in her own body before, unable to do anything but scream and breathe and shift her eyes around to take in the sight of horrors that could have crawled out of a nightmare. Dark brown quadrupedal figures chittered between themselves while they tossed unresponsive colonists into pods that looked moist and alive, and none of them could even scream in terror when the coffins closed over them, dooming them to some horrible fate. Slavery? Dissection? Twisted pleasures? Once more, she wanted to shriek and thrash, but her body would not respond to her, and Ashley Williams knew sheer terror for the first time in her life.

* * *

Garrus was still irritated when they boarded the shuttle, but he was standing with Jack and Jacob on one end of the shuttle discussing things with them while Shepard paid attention out the corner of his eye with a faint smile. Despite the conversations they'd had about his old squad, it had felt like he'd barely made any progress in the turian's stubborn refusal to relinquish responsibility for another's betrayal. But at least now he seemed to be back in a familiar role, and even Jack had smirked at some joke he'd told about Wrex and Fist. Miranda smacked his thigh, and Shepard returned his attention to the datapad with the orbital scan of the colony while they revised their plans.

Zaeed, to no one's surprise, was sound asleep across from them, his head lolled to the side with his face pressed against the bulkhead. Apparently, professional soldiers weren't the only ones who learned to find sleep wherever they could. Mordin, as usual, was buried in a datapad, humming to himself while his fingertips worked frantically over the haptic interface, but whether he was writing a paper for a medical journal or reviewing data was anyone's guess. Grunt was devouring a large stick of some sort of preserved sausage at a prodigious rate, ignoring everything but the food. Jacob had asked Shepard just how difficult it was for krogan to get out of their armor and dispose of all the food they ate, but both men had immediately winced and decided to move onto another topic. Kasumi was nowhere in sight, but Shepard imagined she was contorted in some strange position making faces at him beneath her cloak, and he considered himself fortunate that the scent of her floral perfume was for the moment overpowering the smell of whatever the hell Grunt was rapidly annihilating between his teeth. So far, they were an interesting cast of characters, but they were all competent and effective, and he was curious to see just how they'd perform on the surface.

Those thoughts faded quickly when he recalled the scans Joker had made of the Collector dreadnought that was _sitting_ on the planet below. It was a profile that was unmistakably familiar to the pilot, and when he'd shared that info with Shepard, the both of them scowled at the image. The Illusive Man had considered the Collectors as the most likely attacker of the original Normandy, but with that confirmation, the two human survivors on the SR2 were eager to return the favor.

* * *

Thousands of light years away, Tali leaned back in her seat with a sigh and read the latest message from Shepard for the third time.

_Got a lead on the Collectors. On our way to check it out. Don't worry, we'll blast a few dozen of them and I'll even shoot one with a shotgun just for you. Not much time, got to go. Stay safe out there._

She knew it was the last she'd hear from him for the next few days. Once they entered geth space, there'd be no comm buoys and no messages letting her know that they'd made it out safely. Kal'Reegar watched as she bowed her head with another sigh and murmured a quiet plea to the ancestors, lifting her head when she finished to gaze over at her equipment locker.

* * *

Ash silently blessed the time she'd spent with Liara on the Normandy when she finally managed to slow her breathing and heart rate down. When she'd first discovered the asari meditating with open eyes in the hangar with a crate slowly wandering through the air in the blue aura of a biotic field, the soldier had considered the asari slightly deranged. But she had to admit that the slow, controlled breathing did wonders for her nerves. Until one of the chittering creatures walked up to her and stared at her for a long moment.

_Oh, God, please make it go away. Please. I don't-_

She was shocked when the creature suddenly levitated into the air and its skin seemed to rip open into a maze of glowing orange fissures, an aura of energy and heat radiating from it, and tendrils of red lightning that instantly brought to mind...

_Oh my God. Sovereign._

The creature, fully transformed, landed on its feet with a final chittering growl and lifted itself out of its crouch to stare at her with glowing yellow eyes. All thoughts of controlling her breathing vanished as the horrified Alliance lieutenant stared at the Reaper puppet that was looking upon her.

_"You will serve our needs. Already he approaches, and you will be the tool that delivers him to us."_

* * *

It didn't take long for him to test out how well a krogan and a salarian geneticist could work together. Scarcely a minute after touchdown they moved into a small picnic area and were immediately fired upon by four Collectors, one of which had a nasty beam weapon that dropped his shields in the half second it took to get behind cover. Fortunately, Grunt was already barreling through one alien on his way to the beam-wielder, and before it could bring the weapon to bear a shotgun slammed up under its chin and destroyed its strange face while the krogan roared. Mordin ignited another Collector with a ball of plasma that made it screech in a hideous insectoid fashion, and Shepard's Mattock took apart the two that remained. Mordin was kneeling over a corpse in a heartbeat, pulling up his omni-tool, but there was little time for that.

"Later, doctor. We can recover corpses when we're finished and you can dissect to your heart's content." Shepard led them in a jog further into the colony, activating his comm. "Blue team, status report."

_"Minimal resistance so far. We got within twenty meters of a seeker swarm without incident. Still proceeding." _Garrus' voice was clipped and perhaps a touch irritable, but as professional as ever.

"Good. White team?"

_"Same, Commander. Proceeding as planned."_

"Acknowledged." A mission against an unknown enemy, going smoothly? He wondered just how long that would last as he stared up at the dark, ominous silhouette of the immense ship that towered over them. It reminded him of Sovereign's grip on the Citadel and put a scowl back on his lips, one that persisted as he peered around a corner to spot a squad of Collectors moving some sort of pods. A familiar sight, one he'd seen on the Freedom's Progress security footage, and they'd already guessed what those things were used for. On the far side of the street he saw Garrus leaning around a corner of his own, taking in the sight of the creatures before his eyes found Shepard's gaze and he leaned back out of sight.

_"We'll hit them first and draw their attention, Shepard."_

"Do it."

A moment later, a trio of Collectors went flying from a rippling blast of biotic energy that kicked up dirt in its path and another went tumbling slowly up into the air while Garrus' rifle barked loudly, tearing the head from one of the aliens with those deadly energy rifles. Shepard moved out of cover and opened fire on the nearest group that had turned their backs to his position, but they spun around only in time to be blasted aside by a charging and roaring krogan while Mordin fired an incinerating blast into another beam wielder. Between the six of them, the dozen Collectors in the small courtyard were dead in ten seconds, but the squad was already moving along their parallel paths as the last dead alien tumbled from the sky into a puddle of its own blood.

Shepard led Grunt and Mordin into another grass street between rows of prefabs with the hair on the back of his neck standing up. Each time he'd looked into the faces of one of the four-eyed Collectors, a tingle had gone down his spine, some strange and almost familiar feeling that he couldn't place. And to make matters worse, resistance had been light for the past five minutes. Mordin had been pleased, Grunt had been disappointed, but the commander had been suspicious. He'd stepped into too many traps to feel at ease with little opposition from a technologically superior enemy with enough room on their ship to house thousands of soldiers. Garrus was leading his team through the street on the other side of the row of buildings to their right, and Miranda's team was moving toward the center of the colony on a circuitous route, acting as their eyes with the Collector ship throwing out enough interference to make sensor readings useless beyond fifty meters.

Ahead of them was another courtyard smattered with picnic tables and large planters that supported young trees and bushes sprouting infant fruits. The setting was idyllic, really, despite the drab prefabricated materials used throughout the colony. And as a half-dozen Collectors suddenly stepped out from behind the planters and another six dropped down from the sky, he was hardly surprised. The three of them dove quickly behind cover, but the chittering aliens were simply aiming their way from behind cover, not firing. The tingle on the back Shepard's neck only intensified for a moment while he traded glances with Grunt and Mordin until a deep, hollow voice echoed through the courtyard.

_"Shepard. Still you live. You stand as a paragon of your doomed species, but resistance is a pointless exercise. Submit and fulfill your role as the harbinger of humanity's destiny."_

The chill that ran down his spine at the sound of the voice was nothing compared to the one he felt when he peered around cover to see a glowing Collector standing with its beam weapon pointed at the head of one of his closest friends, her brown eyes wide with shock and terror.

* * *

Ashley couldn't believe her eyes. The possessed alien had dropped the stasis field and shoved her forward through the colony, that bone-chilling voice still echoing between her ears. She'd known what the power behind that voice and those glowing eyes was from the moment she'd witnessed them, and the knowledge that she was being taken for some other purpose left her stomach clenched in an icy ball. Her only comfort was the thought of the Alliance frigate that would be arriving in six hours to offload upgraded power converters for the GARDIAN batteries, but that was a long time when a Reaper-possessed alien had a rifle to your back and the grip of the fist around her heart only tightened step by step. Until she found herself staring at the face of a man whose soul she'd prayed for throughout the past two years, and hope suddenly returned to her.

But it faded as soon as she remembered the reaper's words to her earlier.

* * *

"Spirits," Garrus muttered as he leaned back out of sight, shaking his head.

"What's wrong?" The sight of the turian's anxiety was evident even to the human, and Jacob's voice was unusually tense while he and Jack knelt and waited.

Garrus was silent for a moment, staring off at the ground while his mind worked before he turned back to them with an angry twitch of his mandibles. "Shepard's pinned down and they've got an old friend of ours. Stay in cover until I call you."

Jack opened her mouth to question what kind of stupid idea was running through the turian's head, but Jacob held up a hand to silence her and simply nodded, clutching tighter to his shotgun.

* * *

Shepard ignored Mordin's wide eyes and held his palm toward them as he rose from cover and glared across the twenty meters that separated him from this Reaper pupper and his captive friend. His entire body was tense, and the words he usually found so easily came out as nothing more than a quiet growl before he asked the only question that came to mind. "What do you want?"

_"You already know our intentions. This cycle comes to an end. Submit, and your companions will not suffer. They will ascend painlessly."_

He saw Ashley staring hard at him, mouthing words, but he kept his gaze locked on the possessed Collector, feeling the faint quivering in his arms that revealed his tension and anger. What the hell was he supposed to do here? Let Ashley die to take out a squad of drones? He could move fast enough to put three rounds into the Reaper puppet's head before he received any return fire himself, but if some of the other Collectors had biotic barriers, this thing surely did as well. Ash would die. _Stall._

"What the hell do you want with me? Revenge for killing your brother?" Shepard adjusted his grip on his rifle, still held across his chest, trying to force the tension out of his muscles while Ash kept staring at him.

_"You cannot comprehend our motivations. Submit or this human dies. We have studied your actions. We know your strengths and your weaknesses. Your affections for your comrades leaves you vulnerable. Do not resist, Shepard, or you will all be destroyed."_

_ "Shepard, I can give you a distraction, but only for a second."_ Garrus' voice came through the comm in a quiet whisper while the Reaper puppet returned his stare from halfway across the courtyard. Beside him, he could sense Mordin and Grunt shifting anxiously behind cover, and he knew they were ready. No doubt Jack and Jacob were as well, but was it enough? He finally let his eyes drift to Ashley's, and to his surprise, the wide expression of terror was gone, replaced by a firm set of her jaw as she nodded her head just enough for him to notice. She was just as willing to sacrifice herself as she had been on Virmire, and the thought lay heavy in his heart.

_"Submit, or you will all die."_

The reaper's voice demanded his attention and he gave it, tightening his grip on his rifle while he glared at the creature's glowing eyes with malice. He had only one card to play, and it was no better than trying to draw for an inside straight. "Five seconds, Garrus... mark." He whispered into his comm before shaking his head at the puppet. "Go to hell."

_"So be it."_

The possessed Collector lifted its rifle to Ashley's head, but Garrus stepped into view on the other side of the prefab with his rifle raised, attracting their attention. He fired a shot that skipped off the particle rifle and dove for cover while Ash followed suit, the yellow energy beam narrowly missing the bun on the back of her head. The Collectors opened up immediately, firing on Mordin and Grunt as they did the same, but two shotguns on the other side of the prefab roared and five of the insectoid aliens fell within two seconds. Shepard was firing on the glowing Collector, but he could only grit his teeth and curse when it shimmered over and over, its barriers heavy enough to absorb almost an entire clip from the Mattock. Only his final shot penetrated but it simply tore a flaming chunk from the creature's shoulder... and it was ignoring him, slamming a foot down on Ashley's ankle as she shrieked in pain, her scrambling crawl toward cover halted while it lifted its rifle toward her head once more.

As his own shields shattered from the impact of Collector fire, Shepard gritted his teeth and stretched out a glowing hand toward their possessed leader and finally found that instinct he'd only managed to tap into once before. He streaked halfway across the courtyard too late to stop a trio of rounds that ripped into his armored torso, but not too late to slam into the glowing Collector, bouncing it hard off the tall planter a few feet away. The creature seemed stunned for a moment, its weapon sparking where it had been crushed between an armored hip and the strong polymer, but the glowing yellow eyes locked on his a moment before Shepard's rifle smashed hard across its face, ripping a blazing orange chunk of flesh, and another, landing a half dozen enraged blows until the hideous thing collapsed and slowly began fading into ash, leaving behind that hollow voice.

_"You will know pain, Shepard. Releasing control."_

By the time he'd turned his attention to the fight, the only Collector survivor was being strangled and the back of its head slammed repeatedly down onto the corner of a planter by a krogan, the courtyard echoing with maniacal laughter. The pile of ash that was slowly blowing away at his feet drew his attention and he gazed down at it numbly before he felt a hand on his forearm.

"...Shepard?"

Lifting his head, he saw Ashley staring at him cautiously from where she sat on the grass, sweat beaded on her forehead from the pain of her broken ankle. She was a mess, splattered with Collector blood, dirt, sweat, with exhaustion and pain on her face, but her eyes held the same concern they'd shown when she'd brought some dinner into his cabin the evening Kaidan had died. The whole situation was a damned mess, a confusing jumble of enemies, motivations, pain, loss, unanswered questions, grim answers... but at least one good thing came out of it. He finally managed a smile and took a knee, drawing her up into a hug. "Hey, Ash."

She laughed, but it was a quiet, nervous sound and she only embraced him lightly before slipping back to stare at him. He had a feeling he knew the question that was on her mind, and he gave her a wan smile. "Yeah, I know, you can't believe it's me. Been through this with Garrus and Tali, and Joker and Anderson. And the Council. And-"

_"Shepard, we've got trouble over here at the GARDIAN battery! We're pinned down, and there's some glowing Collector throwing out attacks I've never seen before!"_

"Fuck," he cursed, rising to his feet and grabbing his rifle. "We need to move! Mordin, stay with Ashley!" The salarian nodded and jogged over while Shepard reloaded his rifle and jerked his head toward the center of the colony, Garrus and the rest nodding and forming up with him as they all broke into a run.

Ashley watched them go with confused emotions while the odd salarian hummed some upbeat tune, scanning her leg with his omni-tool. Whether her prayers had been answered or the galaxy was playing a cruel trick on her, she wasn't certain.

* * *

"Goddamn, this bastard won't go down!" Zaeed growled when he practically threw himself back into cover as another ball of that vicious plasma missed him by mere centimeters to smash into the wall behind his position. Miranda gave him a grim glance as they both reloaded. Her own biotic attacks had severely weakened the possessed Collector's barriers, and Kasumi's submachine gun fire had taken them down, but its armored carapace took repeated impacts. Husks kept climbing up behind them, Collector fire kept pinning them down, and the chittering aliens kept advancing.

"Shepard will be here, just keep firing, damnit!"

Zaeed gave the Cerberus operative a glare, but he leaned out and pulled the trigger as fast as his finger could work while Miranda swallowed and worked up the energy to fire off another biotic warp at the glowing figure. When it struck, the thing finally crackled and the glows died away to leave it collapsing into ash, but more husks screeched from behind them and two more drones landed in the battlefield, firing as soon as their feet hit the grass. She could hardly believe it. She'd led them through half the colony with only light resistance, had hacked a pair of doors to take a shortcut, saved Kasumi from a husk with an instinctively thrown biotic barrier, and now here she was, about to die after leading them into an obvious trap without backup close at hand.

"So much for perfection," she muttered bitterly, but she twisted and fired at a husk that was sprinting at her, her Locust spitting rounds that tore into its face. It collapsed atop her, claws ripping into her forearm and thigh deep enough to make her yell in pain, but Zaeed grabbed it by the neck and yanked it off her with a low chortle.

"Keep firing, goddamnit!"

"Good advice," Kasumi added helpfully before a storm of fire erupted off to their right, leaving Collector drones shrieking with pain and alarm. They lifted their heads to see what looked like a firing squad pouring shots into the courtyard, and in only a few seconds nothing moved out on the grass. Shepard glanced over at them, reloading as he moved toward them with a faint smirk on his lips. He looked like hell with his scraped armor and blood trickling out of a few holes on the right side of his chestplate, but it didn't seem to stop him from hitting her with his usual sarcasm.

"How the hell did you end up in a position like this, Miss Lawson?"

She scowled at him and rose with a hiss of pain from her bleeding leg. She wasn't in the mood to have a heart to heart about her mistake. "Don't start with me, Shepard. What kept you?"

The amusement on his face vanished as quickly as it had appeared and he shook his head. "Long story. Come on. You too, Kasumi. We need this battery operational."

"You got it, Shep." It was hard to believe the little thief could remain so cheerful, Miranda thought with a roll of her eyes, but at least she wasn't an idiot. A fact proven a moment later. "Oh, Shep? You're bleeding. Might want to get that looked at."

* * *

While the squad scavenged up thermal clips and Kasumi worked with EDI on the battery's targeting system, Miranda listened to Shepard's brief on the Reaper-possessed Collector and squirted some medigel into the holes in his armor, ignoring his winces. When Mordin had called in to say Ashley was safely back at the shuttle, he looked relieved but promised he'd relate the story later, and they all took a knee close to available a cover to rest while EDI began the calibrations on the targeting software for the GARDIAN battery. To no one's surprise, their reprieve was quickly interrupted by a trio of new nightmares. A half dozen glowing red husks crawled out from under prefabs at the other end of the courtyard while a pair of huge, lumbering blue husks with cannons on their arms slowly waddled into view. The worst, however, was an immense insectoid creature with an armored carapace and a gaping maw filled with skulls. While Shepard would have pitted his squad of eight against any nine combatants five minutes before, these new monstrosities forced him to change that thinking.

Zaeed and Jack swore a litany of curses as they dove for cover while the ground they had been occupying erupted from a pair of shockwaves the lumbering husks fired at them. Kasumi stared blankly at the fire that burned on the grass when the red husk she'd shot blew apart, muttering 'They explode? Really?' with a flat voice. And while Grunt laughed maniacally and kept pouring fire into the other husks, savoring their explosions, Shepard quickly found himself sprinting from cover to cover while the giant floating shape fired a particle beam at him. Garrus and Jacob tried to distract it with their fire, but as Shepard dove behind a truck with a curse, he knew their attempts were pointless. The Reaper behind the glowing bipeds clearly had a score to settle.

When the husks were cleared out, half the squad focused on the larger forms that kept driving them out of cover with shockwaves. Miranda panted and dropped to a knee with exhaustion when she unleashed another warp that finally annihilated the barrier of the abomination pursuing Shepard, but Jacob shoved her aside as a shockwave blasted into him and sent him flying to slam hard against a wall. He dropped limply to the ground while Miranda shouted his name and rushed over to him, turning a moment later to see the giant husk staring down at her, lifting its arm to fire off another shockwave. Before it fired, a flash of blue erupted at its side and it rocked to the side before an armored gauntlet slammed into it and finished the job. It tumbled to the ground with a disgusting splatter of blue fluids that erupted from its back, and Shepard's rifle finished the job right before a beam slammed into his barriers and shattered them a split second before he charged off again into the other husk.

"Spirits," Garrus muttered while he reloaded his rifle and took a moment to watch the game Shepard was playing with the largest threat. His charges left him glowing fiercely with a strong biotic aura for a few seconds, and they were keeping the hovering nightmare at bay behind the various crates and vehicles that littered the central courtyard of the colony. Grunt and Zaeed were throwing grenades and rubbing their fingers raw on the triggers of their heavy rifles while they pursued it, and as Shepard knocked down the remaining husk, the floating abomination finally reacted to the damage it was taking, falling to the ground with a loud shriek and an explosion of biotic energy that sent the krogan and the mercenary tumbling backward.

"You've got to be kidding me." Shepard was breathing as heavily when he came up beside Miranda and Jack, watching as the... bug?... seemed to recharge its energy. Zaeed and Grunt shook off their pain and rose, while Kasumi tended to the fallen Jacob.

"I don't want to know what factory produces these things." Garrus had a knack for dry humor, but he just sounded tired while they all reloaded and took a moment to catch their breath. Shepard glanced quickly around the courtyard, but with no more targets, it was back to running.

"All right, I'll keep it occupied while you guys just keep putting rounds into its ass. Miranda, Jack, shove some warps down its throat: we need to get that damn barrier back down before we run out of ammo." He cursed the inventors of thermal clips as the insectoid levitated back into the air and he took off running. He dove into a roll behind crates when the beam flashed and burned a line across his side that made him stifle a shout of pain. The courtyard echoed with gunfire when the rest of the squad opened up and two explosions from the biotics' attacks made their enemy's barriers shimmer heavily, but it kept pursuing while Shepard tried to ignore the agony in his side, sprinting for the truck that would keep it at bay for a few seconds.

Zaeed's keen eye noticed when the barrier began flickering violently, and as soon as his shots sparked from impacting armor, he yelled out. "Barrier's down, Shepard!" He and Grunt hit the switch on their grenades and threw them in unison, the thermite hissing violently when it splashed over the armored carapace. Jack managed another warp before she dropped heavily to a knee and fired her shotgun, and Garrus put a round into one of the glowing eyes.

_Gods, what does it take to kill these fucking things?_ Shepard watched as it approached, shrieking its anger and firing again while he ducked behind the engine block of the truck. He could hear the metal of the engine sizzling when the energy sliced into it and he yanked the arc projector from his back, charging and rising out of cover just in time to fire a blast into the opened maw that contained the mess of skulls. It shrieked again, much louder this time, and suddenly began to glow while white cracks spread throughout its carapace. A moment later, the entire thing flared up and vanished with a blinding flash.

_"Calibrations complete. Ready to fire, Shepard."_

He stared up at the sky while he caught his breath, shaking his head slowly at the AI's impeccable timing. "By all means, EDI, start firing."

* * *

_ "Oh, for the love of-"_

_ "God?"_

_ Shepard turned to the side to return Ashley's wide grin, shaking his head while he tried again to latch the disassembly lever on the Spectre-grade rifle he'd bought an hour earlier. Why such a well-engineered weapon had such a cumbersome diassembly mechanism, she had no idea, but she gave its gleaming black shape a longing gaze. "I was going to say 'gods'."_

_ Ash fixed him with an incredulous stare, folding her arms beneath her breasts while she leaned against the workbench. "Gods, plural? Don't tell me I got rescued by a pagan... sir." The thought was distasteful to the monotheistic gunnery chief, but she still couldn't help but fix him with her best smile, one that always seemed to come out as a wry grin around him._

_ He laughed and shook his head, which was some comfort, at least. "No. A heathen, maybe. I started saying that as a boy to irritate a friend of mine who shared your beliefs. I figured I'd see if it has the same effect on you."_

_ "Hmm." She pretended to ponder that, gazing down at the workbench for a moment while she felt his eyes upon her. "Maybe." She looked back up at him and arched a suspicious brow at him. "You're not one of those COs who enjoys poking his subordinates for reactions, are you, sir?"_

_ "Depends on the subordinate," he replied smoothly while the disassembly latch snapped back into place and he gave her a grin, collapsing the rifle and sliding it over to her side of the workbench. "Enjoy the new toy, Chief."_

_ She felt her cheeks warm as she watched him nod at Wrex in passing before he vanished into engineering, no doubt to speak with Tali. Sometimes she wondered if that man was toying with her, hell, with all three of his female recruits, but she couldn't deny that he was always there to lift their spirits. When she'd read the letter from her sister about the passing of an aunt, she hadn't cracked a smile until Shepard came down to work beside her, quietly chatting about comments Wrex had made on Noveria about eating people. And she was grinning again while she expanded her new rifle and started disassembling it. How he cheered them all up like that was a secret she was dying to know._

_ Of course, a few minutes later, the quiet of the hangar bay was broken by the sound of an exasperated female voice exclaiming 'Oh, for the love of -'_

"God!"

A sharp jolt of pain tore Ashley from the memory when Mordin's strong fingers tugged on her foot, the other hand securely gripping her lower calf while he set the bone. "I thought you gave me a painkiller!" She fixed the salarian with a hard glare.

"Indeed. Takes a few minutes for full effectiveness, but little time to spare. Other patients require my attention." He smiled at her, an odd thing to see from an alien that looked like something out of twentieth century science fiction / horror films, but Ash couldn't help but smile.

"All right, go ahead. I'll just... sit here." Mordin nodded and started to turn, but she reached out and grabbed his arm. "Wait!" The professor turned with a patient sigh, opening his mouth, but she beat him to the punch. "You're... I mean, you're absolutely sure it's Shepard? Not some clone or-"

"Quite certain. Been over this twice already! Now, will sedate you if you don't let me go."

Ash let her fingers slip from his arm with a sigh and nodded, and the salarian quickly scurried off with a medical kit while she leaned against the bench seat of the shuttle, leaving her leg stretched out on the deck in front of her. She thanked God for small favors, as the Collector's foot had snapped the bones just above her ankle instead of the joint itself. Far less damage than what Shepard had apparently sustained when he...

She shook the thought off and sighed, glancing down at her wrist. She had no idea how she was going to explain all of this to Anderson.

"How're you doing?" The voice made her jump and she looked up to see Shepard at the open hatch of the shuttle, his eyelids drooping but a tired smile on his lips.

"Um... just what do you want me to say to that, Skipper?" She let all of her weight slump against the bench and she sighed, staring down at the deck. "We just lost, what, half the colony?" He paused for a moment and nodded. "Half the colony. The Collectors are real, they're working for the Reapers, and both of them want your ass... and these people just got caught in the crossfire. Because of me."

His brows rose in surprise at that admission. He hadn't expected her to come to that theory, at least not so quickly. It had struck him as well, halfway back to the shuttle, that the Collectors might have hit Horizon because of her presence. It was an unusual choice, after all, one of the few colonies that had modern defenses. But still, he couldn't help but smile faintly with pride that the 'dumb grunt', as she'd once referred to herself, had apparently turned into an excellent officer. "I know. But Ash, if they'd hit any other colony, we still would have lost half of them, or hell, maybe even the whole thing. We were lucky to be only two relay jumps to Horizon." He reached out and slipped two fingers beneath her chin to lift her gaze, giving her a wry grin. "Besides, saving damsels in distress is my specialty. You know that."

She smirked and slapped his hand away, but a quiet laugh escaped her lips and she gave him a glare. "I'm not a 'damsel', thank you very much. I'm a First Lieutenant in the Systems Alliance Navy and a graduate of ICT. I could kick your ass from here to the Sol System and back." He moved his hand to his mouth and yawned theatrically while he tapped the N7 logo on his chest. "Don't give me that. I'm only on a damn colony because I broke my femur a couple of weeks ago."

"Excuses." Her glare didn't diminish, but he folded his arms and leaned against the side of the shuttle with a sigh, running a hand back through his dusty, oily hair. "This is all a damn mess. The Collectors are running rampant through the Terminus abducting our colonies, and they're working for the Reapers." He grimaced and gazed at the Cerberus logo on the bulkhead that divided the passenger compartment from the cabin of the shuttle. "Can't believe I'm saying this, but Cerberus was actually right about this."

_God, how did I let myself forget about __**that**__? _ Ash berated herself, the glare returning to her eyes when she stared at her former commander. "Shepard, what the hell are you doing with Cerberus? You remember... no, of course you do." She sighed and rubbed at a spot on the chestplate of her armor. "Mordin told me your reasons, but... come on, you're a hero to the Alliance and you're practically family to Anderson! Why didn't you just go to them?" She was practically shouting at the end, a fact she only realized when the weariness in Shepard's eyes was replaced with a flash of anger.

"What the hell do you think I did, Ash? You think I woke up after two years and decided 'For my next career, let's join the terrorist organization responsible for butchering my men!'?" His fingers gripped the side of the hatch hard enough to make his gauntlets creak while he glared at her. "The Illusive Man – their leader – told me the Alliance and the Council just wanted to bury their heads in the sand, and when I saw Anderson, he just sighed and admitted it. Hell, the Council only reinstated my Spectre status because I promised to stick to the Terminus." His anger spent, he bowed his head and sighed, dropping to a seat on the grass beside the shuttle and leaning his head against the hatch. "If I'd told Cerberus to screw off, Garrus and Tali would be dead. Maybe you, too, and hundreds of other colonists. It's the only reason I sleep at night."

Ashley's own anger dissipated as he spoke, and when he fell silent with his eyes locked on a spot of grass beside the shuttle, she reached out to lay a hand on his shoulder with a sigh. "I'm sorry, Shepard. I just... it's been hard. I've missed the old crew... and you."

He managed a quiet chuckle and reached up to set a hand on hers. "Yeah, right. I bet you were just aching to chew me out for sending you to OCS."

"Exactly." They shared a laugh and cracked a smile again before they caught sight of Miranda and Jacob heading their way. Ash arched a brow and leaned down to murmur quietly. "If all the Cerberus women dress like that, why do you find it hard to sleep at night?" Laughing, he shook his head and left the question unanswered while Jacob snapped a salute at Shepard before heading over to the other shuttle where Mordin and Chakwas were treating the injured. Miranda and Ashley exchanged an emotionless glance for a moment before the Cerberus operative held out a datapad for Shepard, who took it.

"Our estimates are forty percent of the colony taken. A little better than we'd hoped. But an Alliance frigate should be here in a couple of hours, so we should get moving."

Ashley's brow arched while she stared at the woman. How she had intel on Alliance ship movements was information she was sorely tempted to extract from the woman in the tight armor. Shepard sighed and passed the pad back, interrupting the women's cold stares at each other. "I'll take what good news we can get. As soon as Chakwas and Mordin are done, we'll head back to the ship." He twisted around to gaze at Ashley with a small smile on his lips. "We could use you, Ash. Plus Tali should be joining us soon, and if we're lucky, Liara and Wrex will have nothing better to do."

She ignored the way the Cerberus woman was staring and sighed, rubbing her temples. _God, how did I know he was going to ask me that?_ "Skipper, I... I would. But I've been working directly for Anderson. I can't just skip out on him... or the Alliance." Ashley frowned at the implications in her words and she was tempted to reverse her position when his blue eyes went from hopeful to disappointed, but he nodded and gave her a half-smile, reaching over to take her hand in his.

"I understand. Well, if you get tired of poking around colonies, maybe Anderson will get his head out of his ass and send you my way." He gave her hand a squeeze before he slipped away and rose, finding Garrus' gaze and waving him over. "I've got a few things to square away, so I'll let your favorite turian babysit you for a bit. Try to stay out of trouble."

As Shepard wandered off beside the Cerberus ice queen, Ashley sighed and lay her head on the bench seat, closing her eyes for a few moments until a familiar voice broke the quiet. "Ash, didn't get you get enough of sitting on your ass after the last time we sparred?"

She opened her eyes and smirked up at the blue-armored turian, eyeing his scars. "What, were you drunk enough to get into a match with Shepard?"

They shared a laugh and Garrus took a seat to catch up with an old... well, friend.

* * *

Waving goodbye to Ashley as the shuttle climbed away and the hatch slid shut was a bittersweet moment. Despite having Garrus, Joker, and Chakwas aboard, the bright corridors of the Normandy, its gleaming surfaces, and all the Cerberus logos left it still feeling uncomfortable and alien, and he'd been hoping to stock it with old friends.

Garrus didn't miss the subtle slump of his friend's shoulders or the distant stare in his eyes as they'd rocketed back toward the Normandy, but there was little he could do for him other than provide a sparring partner, an ear, and a drinking buddy. None of which seemed to do more than take the edge off his stress. He'd be good moods after reading a message from Tali, but they faded as well. _Well, at least he hasn't taken up drinking._ Garrus was all too familiar with that temptation, finding it hard to resist taking just one more sip from the bottle he'd crack open across from Shepard on the couch up in his cabin. But they both always put the bottles away after just enough to warm their stomachs and lighten the mood.

He shifted his position against the bulkhead across from the door to the conference room, pulling up the ship's schedule that Miranda so meticulously kept updated. They were tentatively set to return to the Citadel in six days, when the Orizaba would be making a port call. Garrus decided it was as good a time as any to take his old friend out for a good old-fashioned night of asari dancers and copious amounts of alcohol. _As long as Tali doesn't find out._ He chuckled just as the doors to the conference room opened and a haggard Shepard stepped out, stopping in his tracks when he saw Garrus. It looked as if he was expecting a confrontation, after their conversation in the hangar bay before the mission, but the words that came from his lips were ones he'd say on any other day.

"I should've known you'd be skulking out here waiting for an invitation to have a drink."

"Yeah, well, I thought about waiting up in your cabin, but there's this horrible stench."

Shepard shrugged and gestured toward the armory while he pulled his Mattock from his back. "We must have another turian stowing away. I'll have Grunt and Jack make a sweep."

"I appreciate it."

* * *

Rael'Zorah felt like a giddy schoolboy, bouncing lightly on his toes like his daughter while he waited for the latest translations to compile. He could hardly believe his eyes when his team had finally managed to decode the latest Geth communications protocols. The data that poured into the rudimentary network their experiments had formed was a treasure trove of information that was only rivaled by the data his daughter had brought back from Pilgrimage two years prior, and as he lifted the pad to being poring through it, he laughed aloud with excitement to see that high priority traffic was also included along with mineral survey reports updated stellar cartography data.

Across the lab, behind a thick pane of duraglass, four lights glowed softly in his direction, the mobile platforms immobilized by programming constraints and physical shackles. Their outbound antennae and self-termination protocols were disconnected with the utmost caution, leaving them the perfect spies, a neverending fountain of information that the admiral intended to exploit to the fullest. He allowed himself a treat and sipped from a sterile bottle of turian brandy through a straw while he perused reports on geth ship movements, his smile never leaving his face. Until he reached the reports from the Dholen system.

Gasping and coughing, drops of liquor splattered onto the inside of his visor as his heart suddenly seized up inside his chest for what felt like an eternity. When it began beating again, he frantically reread the report, and again twice more with careful examination of every word.

"Oh, keelah," he whispered.

_Vessel: Frigate JX-918_

_Status: Dispatched to Haestrom in Dholen system._

_Background: Unidentified vessel, tenatively classified as quarian shuttle (56.734% probability), briefly discovered passing through system. Most likely destination: Haestrom (78.296% probability). Radiation emissions from star Dholen make further tracking an impossibility._

_Mission: Investigate possible intrusion and neutralize any invaders._

* * *

_**Author's note:**_

_ I have the nagging feeling I forgot something, some important piece of dialogue or a little bit of exposition. I don't know. Read through it three times and can't find anything, though. Argh._

_ Hope you enjoy anyways. Haestrom's up next. Might be a two-parter, not sure._


	18. Roaring rampage

** Author's note:**

_Wrote this first, I think, before I decided to write an entire game's worth of story. Been looking forward to posting it. Parts of it feel a little over the top, but that was part of the fun. If Denzel Washington can go on a roaring rampage to recover a little girl, Shepard can do the same for a cute quarian. Besides, vanguards are OP anyways. Nerf all the things._

_ Forgot to mention in my notes for Horizon that I always found Ashley's attitude in-game to be a bit too much to swallow. I mean, even if she's not romanced, she doesn't for a second hesitate to become a mutineer and follow Shepard to Ilos, and she's fully aware of the threat the Reapers pose and the Collector ties to them are obvious. I also found her promotion from NCO to an officer rank that would normally take years to achieve an oddity, and she acquitted herself well on Virmire working with Kirrahe, so voila, Shepard recommended her for Officer Candidate School._

_ Despite Miranda not being one of the characters that frequently makes me smile, I find her one of the most interesting to develop, so that's why you'll find a lot of time spent on her thoughts and motivations. Expect to see more from others' perspectives, though, now that the squad's mostly together._

_ Anyways. Enjoy, or Tali and Garrus will be eaten by a thresher maw on Tuchanka._

* * *

The Normandy sat silently out in the void between stars, hidden and safe, while their two Kodiak shuttles hovered beneath the ship's sleek snout with EVA crews moving about slowly. The past two days had been a mixed blessing. While most appreciated the downtime after the nightmare that was Horizon, the quiet left Shepard and Grunt restless. With the hangar bay finally cleared of the mess of a construction project that had been the new Thanix cannons, the human and krogan were taking the opportunity to train and half the squad was watching and passing around credit chits while Shepard dodged Grunt's charges and mighty blows, pointing out the flaws in his methods. Most would work quite well against other krogan, but against an agile opponent like Kasumi or Jack, he'd been left huffing with anger after failing to land a single blow. It was perhaps the first time Garrus hadn't been placing wagers or fighting himself, but he was busy in the forward battery helping Donnelly and an EVA crew as the old cannons were removed and replaced with the new. Even EDI had sounded impressed when she described the improved destructive power over the old mass accelerators.

Miranda had buried herself in reports and tried not to think about her tactical blunder on Horizon that had nearly gotten her team killed. That lasted for almost a day until Shepard came in and passed her a bottle of wine, ordering her to start talking. It had taken half an hour and two glasses of wine before she'd finally admitted the depth of her anger at her own mistake, but he'd simply shrugged and pointed out that his own team had walked right into a squad of Collectors that were holding his teammate hostage. That was good enough for her to smirk and throw a barb at him, but it helped, and they watched the stars twinkle in silence for a while until he slipped out and she returned to her reports with a fresh glass of wine at hand.

Jack was the ship's recluse, but with engineers constantly buzzing around the power conduits in her subdeck and stomping around above her while the cannons were being installed, she'd slipped out to watch the fights from a dark corner of the hangar bay with a smirk on her lips. Kasumi had wandered over once with her customary cheerfulness, inviting her to participate, but a few choice curses and two glowing fists ended that conversation just as quickly as it began. The next day, however, she finally decided to participate and had to groan when her first opponent was drawn. Jacob hadn't looked any more pleased than she, but their fight lasted a good half hour that was filled with taunting and the glow of biotics. Shepard himself didn't participate in the little tournament Zaeed had set up, to Grunt's disappointment and the relief of others, but he watched with some amusement while he worked on the shuttles with Gabby, upgrading their thruster output as they chatted amiably. He was mainly assisting her, but it was a relaxing change of pace from reading reports or watching rifle rounds shred the tissue of living beings, and the young engineer grinned when she caught her commander humming pleasantly to himself as he adjusted a fuel regulator.

* * *

Rael had spent an hour pacing anxiously back and forth around the mess he'd made of the lab, datapads scattered on the deck from where he'd swiped them off his desk in frustration. Revealing the information he'd received would tell the other admirals far too much about the nature of his experiments aboard the Alarei and ruin the only real chance they had to retake their homeworld in his lifetime. Shepard was the only option he could think of, the worst of limited choices given his Cerberus ties, but his attempts to initiate a connection only left him cursing. Wherever the man was, he was out of reach, and the first urge he'd had to slam a fist into the human returned while his fingers twitched at his sides.

Dropping heavily into a seat, Rael leaned his helmet into his hands and closed his eyes for a brief moment before his entire body jolted in a sudden realization and he pulled up his omni-tool. There was only one option left that he could think of, and he quickly typed up a message despite the bile that threatened to rise into his throat.

* * *

The Illusive Man kept the hangar feed from the Normandy up on one of his monitors while he went through his briefings and data, cigarettes and tumblers of whiskey always at hand. Progress so far had let him quite satisfied, though he was less than enthusiastic to see the Normandy sitting idly in interstellar space while the cannons were installed when they could have done that over Illium. But Shepard had made a valid point about the Normandy being vastly outclassed by the Collector ship, and the Thanix cannons were easily powerful enough to make a sneak attack on a cruiser a devastating and quick victory. And so the squad got two days off to recover from minor wounds and aching muscles while Shepard and Miranda supervised a series of upgrades both major and minor.

When his message terminal trilled quietly, he set down the datapad of Omega-4 relay activity and turned to examine his newest communique. He nearly dropped his glass in surprise when he opened the message that had been forwarded through one of their shell companies.

* * *

_"Shepard, the Illusive Man would like to speak with you. He says it is a priority."_

The commander sighed and tore his attention away from where Zaeed and Jacob faced off against Grunt. The fight had gotten off to such a good start, too. Rising and handing off his drink to Gabby, he headed for the elevator. "Be there momentarily, EDI."

When the wireframe hologram morphed into the image of the Illusive Man's gleaming black office, he put on his best diplomatic face and watched a plume of smoke escape from parted lips. "Shepard, I've just received some information that you won't like." He stubbed out the cigarette and tapped on a console built into his chair's armrest, pulling up an image of a planet. "Haestrom, in the Dholen system. It's in Geth space."

Shepard stiffened immediately, recalling what Tali had mentioned about her mission's location, and he took a step forward. "What's going on?"

"Your former teammate, Tali'Zorah, is on Haestrom and we just learned that the geth are aware of their presence. They have a ship on the way to search for them. The entire system is a nightmare for scanners due to unusual radiation from the star, and the planet even more so, but you and I both know the Geth don't give up easily."

He could feel those inhuman glowing eyes on his, knew they were soaking up any information they could find from his expressions and reactions, but at the moment, he didn't particularly give a damn. "You're right about that. I'm setting a course."

"EDI has informed Mister Moreau. Good luck, Shepard."

The commander was already stepping out of view before he finished his sentence, booted feet echoing loudly on the metal of the deck. He muttered a curse beneath his breath as he hurried out of the conference room and through the lab, ignoring Mordin's greeting, and then Kelly's, as he stormed up to the cockpit to find Joker already plotting a course. "How long, Joker?"

The bearded pilot hesitated for a moment before he looked up at his commander, lips drawn tightly. "It's just one jump away, but it'll take us two hours to finish installing the cannons and another four to get there."

_I just had to drag us out into interstellar space. _Shepard sighed and nodded. "Shave it any way you can. I'm heading down to the main battery."

Joker twisted in his seat to watch as heavy footfalls carried the commander rapidly down the corridor before he returned to his panel and sighed. Tali, Garrus, Ashley, and now Tali again. He wondered why his friends had such a talent for getting themselves into trouble that left Shepard stressed enough to practically put holes in the bulkheads.

_"Is something wrong, Mister Moreau?"_

He pulled his cap from his head and ran a hand back through his hair while he frowned at the hologram. "There's always something wrong. Haven't you noticed that by now?"

EDI had gathered enough data on the pilot's moods to remain silent while he returned to work.

* * *

There was no shortcut to be taken, and ripping the cannons out would take more time than it would to finish installing them onto their mounts. Garrus scowled and grunted inside his helmet while he tugged hard on a wrench until it clicked, the last fastening finally torqued down. Attaching the tool to the magnetic case tethered to his waist, he pushed off the deck and floated through the depressurized forward battery to the console, grabbing it and swinging his legs down, letting the magnetized soles of his boots reattach to the deck. Zero gravity still upset his stomach, but he once more forced down the tickle in his throat and began dancing his fingers over the haptic interface at a speed even Tali would be proud of.

As the cannons began retracting into the battery, Garrus sighed and leaned heavily against the console. "Garrus to Shepard. Cannons are installed, outer doors closed. We're ready as soon as the shuttles are back aboard."

_"All right. I'll have Jacob get your gear together. I want those cannons calibrated by the time we get to Haestrom."_

Garrus chuckled quietly and started a diagnostic. "Never thought I'd hear you _order_ me to calibrate something. Garrus out."

When gravity returned to the deck and his heads up display read green on the atmosphere, the turian yanked off his helmet and tossed it aside, failing to notice that he didn't hear it bouncing off the deck. Miranda set it on the workbench before she joined Mordin on either side of Garrus, who looked up at them with some surprise. The salarian dove right in to help work while Miranda arched a brow at the turian. "I think reports can wait, don't you?"

"They can always wait. But what do you know about experimental cannons?"

Miranda scoffed and walked over to the cannons, hopping the rail and kneeling while she began hooking up the power couplings. "Are you kidding? I read through those schematics twice."

Garrus recalled what Shepard had mentioned about her intellect and memory but had never put much stock in it. He pulled up the list of errors in the targeting system. "Only twice? Five times for me."

"Turian memory not as developed as salarians' or Operative Lawson's," Mordin chimed in while his own fingers danced over the console, deflating the turian a bit. "Curious, though. Why are we on our way to geth space? Heard something about a quarian, but gossip common aboard ship. Never put much faith in it."

"We have an old friend there. She was on our crew when we were hunting Saren." Garrus' voice was a distracted murmur while he ran through the targeting system's flaws.

"And while we're on our way to the edge of the galaxy to save one quarian, the subjects of our two newest dossiers might be on their way off of Illium." Miranda sounded a touch irritable while she connected the power to the port cannon with a grunt of effort. "This isn't an efficient use of our time."

Garrus lifted his head and fixed her with a glare while his fingers curled around the edge of the console, talons scratching the polymer. "And it would have been safer for us to set up an ambush instead of charging in to pull you out of the mess you created yesterday, but none of us hesitated." He didn't miss the wince that briefly tightened the corners of Miranda's eye and took the opportunity to continue. "What, do you think Shepard had a crew of aliens because we enjoyed being shot at? If you look after your team, they'll look after you."

Miranda was silent as she kept working and Garrus' mandibles twitched in the turian equivalent of a smirk. Beside him, Mordin was humming quietly to himself as if he hadn't heard a word of it.

* * *

Jacob had patched the holes in his N7 armor, but there was a faint discoloration of the textured charcoal grey where the rounds had punched through to lodge themselves a few inches into his skin. His mind idly contemplated the strangeness of that thought, that tiny particles could do devastating damage to a body at hypersonic speeds but were little more than birdshot when armor abraded and slowed them. It had once amused him that he'd never been seriously wounded by gunfire: shrapnel, blunt trauma, claws, acid and a couple of knives had been the extent of his life-threatening wounds. But the thought of Tali's suit being punctured by a storm of gunfire had begun to scare him in their last few weeks of pursuing Saren. At one point, he'd nearly told her to stay behind, but the sight of her standing ready at the Mako before any of the others, bouncing out her anxiety on her toes, only made him smile. In a way, she was the most fragile of all of them, but she never let that stop her. It was the quiet of the Normandy that had kept her awake at night until he'd sent her a few of his favorite musical compositions, not fear of danger or death.

He exhaled a deep breath and glanced over at the picture Shala had sent him, managing a faint smile before he stood and took a seat at his desk, pulling up the available information on the former quarian colony. But the datapad went flying across the room only a few seconds later and Shepard stood again with a frustrated sigh at the pointless exercise. Information on a colony abandoned to the geth three hundred years ago? There was little more than the occasional orbital recon probe report and no maps of the surface. They'd be going in blind. That wasn't uncommon; hell, it was very familiar, but being unable to come up with anything resembling a plan was suddenly maddening.

He forced himself to take a slow, deep breath while he gazed into the fish that swam slowly through the tank. They were simple creatures, without a care in the world, but he'd never been one for pets he couldn't hold. He wasn't even sure why he'd bought them except to add a little life to the dull metal environment. He wandered over to the clear cage up on a shelf behind his main desk and sat a few moments later, letting the furry little hamster wander along his arms while he stared at the fish and tried to focus on creating some semblance of a plan.

Enemy? Geth, easy enough: he'd fought hundreds and they were predictable. Objective? Secure Tali and her team. Environment? Unknown, probably a rundown mess of old buildings with nonfunctional doors and other electronics. Reminiscent of Feros, perhaps. Plan?

...Plan?

He sighed and gently picked up the unnamed hamster, cradling it gently between his hands. At least with a delicate little creature in his grasp he wouldn't try to smash something in frustration, and he murmured at it with a hollow smile. "I don't suppose you want my job, do you?" He reached down and pulled open a drawer, removing a little bag of seeds. He sprinkled a few on his palm and the hamster began nibbling immediately, tickling his skin with its teeth and whiskers. While it ate, he resumed his unfocused staring into the fish tank, wondering just what he was going to do.

* * *

The plan was going off without a hitch, and Tali couldn't help but smile with a modicum of pride at having come up with it herself. Kal managed his marines, of course, and led the fire team, but she'd set the objectives after making a few orbital scans of the ancient observatory and surroundings that still existed in fleet records. They'd landed without incident, made it most of the way through the colony without so much as an ominous noise, and now they were only a few hundred meters from the observatory. In a few hours, they'd be off this overheated rock and back to the fleet, where she'd pack her few belongings and head to the Citadel. Behind her visor, she was smiling, and her expression was obvious from the sound of her voice while she explained the purpose of an ancient and broken instrument up on a roof nearby.

Behind her, Kal kept his laugh stifled and shook his head at the sight of the spring in her step. On the shuttle she'd been quiet and a touch depressed, burying herself in her datapads, but being on the surface without geth on their tail had invigorated her. Looking around at old buildings built by maskless quarians with their bare hands left a touch of sadness in all of them, but Tali was the first to begin smiling and pointing out interesting landmarks with a happy note in her voice. It proved infectious, though his marines were well trained and kept their heads on a swivel. None of them missed Tali's mention of Shepard in the first two log entries she made, but they'd given Kal inquisitive glances when he chuckled just quietly enough to keep Tali from overhearing. He said nothing, of course.

"Sir, hold up... do you hear that?" Kal held up a fist to stop the squad and he turned to share a look with his rear guard whose auditory pickups were the envy of the team. They all listened for a moment but shook their heads while Tali's stomach began to fall.

"Geth dropship," she whispered, pointing to the south where a tiny speck of darkness was visible low on the horizon over a stone building. "We need to take cover!"

"Taala, get your team into the buildings on the west! Move!"

Tali was already running off to the east with one of the members of her science team in tow, Kal following close behind with a half-dozen marines. As they made it into cover, they all winced at the sound of plasma fire and the shrieks of the soldiers that hadn't made it to cover in time. She blinked her eyes to clear the sudden warmth of the tears that welled in them while she pulled her shotgun and jogged over to Kal who was already leaning out of cover and firing at geth platforms that the dropship had left behind. All they'd wanted was some data on the star, and now they'd be lucky to leave the planet alive. But there was only one way out now, and she started firing with gritted teeth.

* * *

"Oh, shit," Joker swore, quickly flicking his screen over to a more detailed magnification. Behind him, Shepard's fingers were clenched tightly on the back of the leather seat and they both watched as the blurry, flickering image of a geth dropship fired down into the colony. There was no sign of the frigate it had launched from, likely orbiting on the other side of the planet.

"Garrus, you're sure you've got those cannons working properly?"

Joker didn't miss the unusually quiet and tense tone of Shepard's voice while he twisted in his seat to shake his head at him. "Commander, we can't fire those unless that dropship moves away from the colony. They'd do a lot of collateral damage on the surface, and so would our torpedoes."

_"He's right, Shepard. This is the only time I'd wish we had smaller guns."_

"Then get your ass into atmosphere and find yourself a better shot, Joker! Garrus, get everyone onto the shuttle. I'll be down in thirty."

Shepard sprinted down the corridor, drawing surprised glances from many of the crew and a look of concern from Kelly, but he noticed none of it as he slammed the button for the elevator and stepped inside, fists clenched at his sides. He'd had no luck coming up with anything useful but a plan to improvise, and his frustration was obvious to everyone when he stepped off the elevator and dashed for the shuttle, leaping in and hitting the hatch closure. "Jacob, get us out of here and down to an LZ closest to where that dropship was firing at."

"Yes, Commander." The Cerberus lieutenant traded a glance with Miranda who sat in the copilot's seat beside him, but they were off the deck swiftly and shooting out the open hangar door before the Normandy hit atmosphere, the two ships soon leaving a blazing trail across the sky.

While the others gave their weapons one last check, Shepard simply stood at the hatch, holding onto the bar overhead while he watched their descent through the viewscreen. Concerned gazes were traded behind him until Kasumi finally made a fierce gesture at Garrus who stifled a sigh and turned to his commander.

"What's the plan, Shepard?"

The spectre was silent for a long moment before he shook his head, the plan finally having come into focus. "No plan for me this time, Garrus. You're in command of the squad."

The looks the squad were exchanging went from concerned to shocked and Garrus' jaw dropped open. "...What? Shepard, come on, I know it's Tali, but I think it'd be better if you-"

Shepard turned and shook his head, silencing his friend with a hard look. "I've been drawing a blank, Garrus. I trust you more than myself on this one. You're up for it, and you already know that." Before the turian could protest, he turned his cold blue eyes on the krogan, the only one to look eager instead of concerned. "You're the only one who can keep up with me, Grunt. If you volunteer, we don't stop. Anything synthetic gets in our way, it dies. You up for that?"

"Ha!" Grunt barked out a laugh and slammed his fists together, standing with a deadly gleam in his eyes. "We'll land on Tuchanka one day and they'll sing a song about this mission."

Shepard only nodded and turned back around to resume staring at the viewscreen while Miranda twisted in her chair to meet Garrus' gaze. The turian shook his head and turned to the squad, taking a deep breath before he began handing out assignments.

* * *

"No, Kal, I'm not going to just hide in here while you all-"

"Damnit, Tali, that's our job! Get the data and bunker down!" Tali was too angry to notice his lapse in self-imposed protocol, but the rough push he gave her before he keyed the door to the observatory left her jaw falling open. _"Lock that door and encrypt it!"_

Her hands were trembling while she pulled up her omni-tool and began doing as she was ordered. It was a familiar feeling, that cold pit of dread in her stomach, but the last two times she'd felt it had come with a steep cost. Alchera and Virmire were two planets she hoped to never see again, and she was certain that before the day was over, Haestrom would either be on that list or it would serve as her tomb. Blinking back tears at the thought of Shepard having to experience the death of another friend, she once more gritted her teeth and ran to the console at the far end of the dim observatory, pulling up her omni-tool and getting to work, despite how pointless the data suddenly seemed.

* * *

The Kodiak hadn't even touched down when Shepard and Grunt leaped out and broke into a run, leaving the rest of the squad behind to exchange disbelieving glances before Garrus barked at them to follow and led them off at a more cautious pace. While the squad moved from cover to cover, Shepard led Grunt to the first door and hit it, not even taking cover before he dashed into the next courtyard. His Mattock's staccato booms echoed off the walls of stone alongside Grunt's while they tore into the few troopers that turned to greet them with spitting pulse rifles.

"He's insane," Miranda muttered on the comm line as she led Jacob and Zaeed to cover, opening up on geth units across the courtyard that had begun to fire on Shepard and Grunt. "He's going to get himself killed for one quarian?"

"The last time I saw that look in his eyes he left behind the corpses of a hundred geth and krogan. I don't think Tali and I had five kills between the two of us on Virmire-" He paused when Shepard suddenly vanished in a streak of blue light and sent a trooper flying thirty meters from his previous position. "...and now you've given him some serious upgrades."

Still, Miranda's stomach clenched while she watched Shepard and Grunt advance through the door into the next courtyard, the commander's barriers glowing from a fusillade of impacts before he vanished again in another azure streak of light. The two of them had torn right through the middle of the geth lines, leaving the squad only the stragglers on the flanks.

"Son of a bitch is hardly leaving us anything to kill," Zaeed griped, but he laughed as soon as he said it while the squad picked up the pace behind Garrus. Steady, precise fire ripped into any geth that exposed themselves from cover, and the main danger ended up being the slippery white fluid and synthetic parts that littered the middle of the courtyard. "Poor bastard must be in love."

Grunt's maniacal laugh suddenly rang in their ears over the comm. _"You're all missing it! It's goddamned glorious! I can barely keep up with him!"_

Garrus' mandibles twitched as he shook his head in disbelief, the squad now at a sprint in what just might end up being a futile attempt to catch up. Kasumi remained behind with Mordin as Garrus had instructed, helping him patch a suit rupture on an injured quarian, and her amused giggle and bubbly voice made a few eyes roll. "Definitely love."

* * *

Grunt had been given imprints on the combat styles of some of the greatest krogan warlords and biotic battlemasters, but the carnage he caught glimpses of was something he could never have imagined. Shepard's rifle fire was relentless and the man barely stopped moving, reloading on the run and charging off in a streak of azure light as soon as his barriers dropped. To their credit, the geth recognized him as the greater threat and Grunt's tough armor shrugged off most of the isolated shots that streaked his way, leaving him free to keep running and firing on the move, smashing any geth units that Shepard left behind with powerful swings of armored fists and the reinforced stock of his rifle. Despite having been alive only a few days, he knew that this battle would be one of the greatest memories of his life and his ecstatic laughs after each kill only invigorated him further.

The sight of Shepard streaking off again and tearing the head off a destroyer unit with a ferocious swing of his rifle added to his glee and he shrugged off the blast of a hunter's plasma shotgun with a howl of rage, charging forward and slamming the geth into a wall with his shoulder. Dropping his rifle, he took a firm grip on the glowing head and roared, ripping it from its shoulders with a spray of white fluids. He nearly ran off with the head still in his hand before he laughed and tossed it aside to recover his rifle, but the delay had left him fifty meters behind Shepard and the distance kept growing. Lowering his head, Grunt resumed his charge, barreling into a trooper and sending it flying, not even pausing to put a kill shot into it in his race to catch up.

When Shepard finally came into view again around a small maze of stone pillars, Grunt's maw gaped open at the sight of the human yanking a machine gun from the hands of a Prime, taking its arms with it. As if to add insult to injury, he dodged around behind the unit and jumped up, grabbing the head of the towering platform and ripping it off with a fierce blue glow before he dropped and kept sprinting, tossing the head aside.

* * *

"Holy shit, no wonder he woke that krogan up!" Jack exclaimed as they entered the courtyard Grunt was quickly vacating, watching the headless geth's neck pouring out white liquid onto the stone. The mess of fluids and metal body parts had grown into a spectacle that would have been gruesome if their enemies weren't synthetic. "I've got to get Shepard to teach me that charge." Her biotics and shotgun had been virtually useless so far while Garrus and Zaeed's long rifles took care of the bulk of the killing. Their heavy shots didn't have the same flash as Shepard and Grunt's beheadings, but their precise fire mowed down opposition at an impressive rate that even Jacob envied.

"If krogan didn't regenerate and Shepard hadn't learned that charge, they'd both be dead, the idiots." Garrus growled under his breath as he reloaded and led them off again in a run. Miranda and Jacob nodded their agreement, but Jack and Zaeed laughed before their mirth was cut off by a high-pitched whine.

"Dropship!" Garrus yelled as they scattered with a number of curses. Miranda glanced up with a sudden dread, but she found her eyes suddenly squeezing shut at a brilliant flash. A moment later, the courtyard trembled beneath their feet and they all had to dive for cover again when burning and glowing debris began raining down onto the stone.

_"You're welcome!"_ Joker sounded quite satisfied with himself over the comm and this time even Miranda and Garrus couldn't help but chuckle before the Normandy roared overhead in a victorious barrel roll. _"I already took care of the frigate and the other dropship. Garrus, man, I __**love**__ you for getting me my new toys."_

"Keep the love. I'll take alcohol instead." Garrus smirked but gestured at the squad to follow him as they all broke into a run again, this time dodging not only puddles of white fluid and body parts, but glowing red chunks of hissing shrapnel.

* * *

Shepard barreled into Grunt and shoved him out of the way of the siege pulse that detonated on the far wall with enough force to rattle their teeth. The few seconds it had taken for the shutters to open was all the time the krogan had needed to catch up, and he was laughing as he rolled to his feet and followed the commander into cover and down a ramp. "This is why I follow you, Shepard! Big things!"

_"What the hell was that? What are we missing up there?"_ Zaeed demanded over the comm, and the squad traded worried glances when Shepard replied coolly.

_"Colossus."_

"Problematic!" Mordin exclaimed, regretting his choice in words instantly when his quarian patient's eyes went wide beneath her visor. "No no, not you." Mordin promptly stuck the woman with a sedative.

_"Not for long."_

The tone of Shepard's voice sent a chill down Garrus' spine.

* * *

"Who the hell are you?" the wounded quarian demanded as the human and krogan rounded the corner and slid into cover to avoid the next siege pulse that left the stone trembling beneath them. The former looked familiar... something about his eyes and the grey armor he wore despite the red blood that was trickling from a hole at the man's side.

"Shepard. He's Grunt. Status report!"

The human didn't even look at him, narrowed azure eyes darting from place to place across the battlefield while the krogan laughed and sprayed geth with his rifle. There was a flash of recognition in the quarian's eyes before he responded, compelled by the commanding tone of Shepard's voice. "Kal'Reegar, Migrant Fleet Marines. Tali and I are all that's left as far as I know, and she's in the observatory up ahead. The geth have been trying to hack the door, but I've been keeping them busy with rocket fire." Kal didn't miss the the relieved exhale of breath or the way Shepard's eyes softened, and he couldn't help but smile behind his visor. Especially when the man pulled a Mantis from his back and picked the head off a destroyer that was advancing across the nearest bridge.

"What else?"

They all ducked when another pulse flew overhead and Kal muttered a curse before continuing. "Colossus has some damned repair protocol, huddles up and fixes itself once it takes some damage. So we've got to scrap it fast once its shields go down." He peered out of cover, watching with no small amount of satisfaction as two more geth platforms erupted with white fluid and fell to the ground. "Left side, your ass is hanging out for the geth. Center is just suicide, don't even think about it. Right side, you've got some cover, but it'll be hell on your shields when you pop out to move or shoot."

Shepard's eyes were focused on the two sets of bipedal legs he could see beneath the massive body of the colossus and he gritted his teeth, knowing they were still working on the observatory door. He ducked behind cover and stared at the ground for a moment before he yanked a pouch of thermal clips from his belt and tossed it at Grunt's feet. "Fuck cover. Grunt, keep the infantry busy. Reegar, stay in cover and watch our backs. If I need a rocket, I'll call you over the comm."

"Channel 617 Theta," Kal replied to the interrogative lift of Shepard's brow, watching as they patched into the channel on their omni-tools. "But if you think I'm just going to sit on my ass while you risk your necks for my mission, you're out of your mind, sir!"

"That wasn't a request, marine!" Shepard snapped at him, fixing the quarian with a glare. "I'm not going to tell Tali that I let one of her friends die on my watch. Keep your ass in cover unless I call you."

Reegar could have replied with the simple fact that he wasn't under Shepard's command, but he instead gritted his teeth and nodded. "Sir."

The commander regarded him with a cold stare for another moment before he lifted his rifle and turned to the krogan. "Grunt, now!" They popped out of cover and unleashed a hail of rounds that ripped through a team of geth that was advancing across the bridge. As soon as they were down, Shepard popped his clip and stood, watching the colossus carefully as it leveled its cannon at him.

Kal's eyes went wide, the image of Tali crying over a broken body armored in scorched charcoal grey suddenly coming to mind. "Sir, what the hell are you doing!?" He nearly dove away from the insane human to avoid the blast of the siege pulse, but instead reached out to try to grab the man. He blinked hard when his hand found nothing but air and Shepard vanished in a streak of blue, the siege pulse flying overhead to explode harmlessly behind their position. Kal scrambled back into cover to peer around the corner, barely aware of the krogan's maniacal laughter while Grunt poured more fire into any platforms in sight.

_Keelah, and I thought the krogan was crazy._

Across the field he spotted Shepard at the feet of the colossus, firing his rifle into its joints from inside its shield perimeter and dodging its legs when it tried to reposition to fire at him. When his rifle ran empty, he simply took it in both hands and smashed it into one leg, the weapon shattering but tearing through the damaged joint to send the colossus stumbling backward as Shepard rolled beneath it and slammed into it with a charge. The force tipped it over onto its side with a crash and Kal heard Shepard bark a short laugh when he drove a glowing blue fist into the lightly armored belly, ripping off the thin armor to expose servos and circuitry.

_"Reegar, give me a rocket!"_

Kal wasn't even aware of his own laughter as he sprang out of cover and took aim at the dark spot on the colossus' grey underbelly, pulling the trigger.

* * *

"What the _hell?_" Miranda breathed as she and Garrus came to a stop behind the opened shutters above Kal and Grunt's position. It wasn't those two that they were noticing, however. They found themselves transfixed by the sight of their commander ripping the belly plating off the toppled colossus before he sprinted away. Though it lay on its side, the massive unit was facing the retreating Shepard and began charging up a siege pulse. Before it could fire, however, the platform exploded in a blinding white flash and a torrent of shrapnel. Sparks lit up all around the courtyard where metal skipped off stone, and the entire squad just stared while Grunt and Reegar kept laughing and firing at the remaining geth infantry. Without the Prime and Colossus' formidable networking capabilities they weren't even a challenge, but it didn't stop Shepard from streaking across the courtyard to send a destroyer unit flying. A biotically charged punch tore the head off another, and in seconds, it was over.

Reegar slammed his fist into Grunt's, ignoring the pain in his smaller wrist while they shared a laugh. The quarian was smiling as he tapped on his omni-tool and sent a message to Tali, deciding against mentioning who would be greeting her when she opened the door. The entire squad lined up at the railing overlooking the courtyard, putting away their weapons and catching their breath while they watched the door a hundred meters away slide open, Shepard stepping inside.

"When he finds out he missed this one, Wrex is going to be _so _pissed_,"_ Garrus muttered before he dropped to a knee and started laughing, all his tension draining away.

* * *

Tali had downloaded the data inside of ten minutes, leaving her with an hour of waiting restlessly while she tried to undo the knot that had formed in the pit of her stomach. Geth jamming had left her in silence a few minutes after Kal had pushed her into the observatory, and after half an hour she'd stopped trying to contact him, letting her tears trickle down her cheeks. They were dead. She knew it. A heavy frigate held two dropships and two entire platoons of platforms, against half a dozen marines and one scientist. There was no hope of leaving the planet alive, but she finally decided to crouch behind a desk and take a firm grip on her shotgun, deciding to take every geth she could with her on her way to join her ancestors.

She'd heard the loud impact of what was either an armature or a colossus outside the observatory, could see the panel beside the door flickering while the geth attempted to hack it, but it wasn't until she heard the colossus begin firing siege pulses that a tiny amount of hope returned to her. But she could only wait, clutching her shotgun in one hand while she pulled up the recording Shepard had given her from their time atop the Mako two years ago, watching it through moist eyes and managing a quiet laugh at the sight of herself tackling the human.

The deafening boom of a powerful explosion made her cringe and curl up into a protective ball as the walls shook and dust began raining down from the ceiling. She remained there, waiting to see if the structure would collapse, until she realized the armature wasn't firing anymore and the sounds of combat had died down. That loud explosion was a good sign... wasn't it? Still, she got back into cover and gripped her shotgun tightly until her omni-tool beeped at her and she pulled up the message, reading with a joyful laugh. Standing, she unlocked the door remotely and squinted at the intense light that silhouetted Kal's frame in the doorway.

_Strange. He looks different._

It took her a moment for her eyes to adjust, but she blinked a few more times at the sight of the familiar face before she dropped her shotgun and rushed forward. "Shepard!"

He nearly collided with Tali in the dark, but his arms flew around her waist and lifted her off her feet to clutch her to his chest, earning him a happy laugh from the slender quarian as she threw her arms around his neck and squeezed tightly with an odd popping sound.

"Ow."

"Oh, I'm sorry!" Tali's smile instantly changed to a frown of concern, but he was still smiling as he gazed up at her, lightly setting her on her feet but not releasing his embrace.

"It does that all the time." He slipped his hands from around her to take her hands in his, squeezing them gently. "Are you all right?"

He could tell she was smiling again, but it faded after a moment and she shook her head. Her voice was nearly a whisper when she gazed down at the stone beneath her feet. "I'm okay, but my team... how many are left?"

All traces of his smile vanished, replaced by a sudden feeling of guilt while his thumbs ceased their light strokes along the backs of her hands. He'd rushed ahead and ignored the quarians lying on the ground, even if they hadn't been moving. "Kal'Reegar's still alive, but... I don't know about anyone else. I'm sorry. I was in a rush to get to you."

"That's an understatement." Shepard turned and Tali peered over his shoulder to see Garrus, recovered from his amusement with arms folded across his chest. "Mordin's working on a couple of wounded now and Miranda's helping Reegar with his suit puncture. Speaking of punctures..." He pointed at Shepard's armor, where a round had torn into his side and blood was still flowing rather freely.

Tali leaned around to gaze at his side and gasped, reaching into a pocket to pull out her medkit. Shepard craned his neck to gaze at it and chuckled quietly. "Ah. I thought I felt a little something. That Prime blew through my barriers faster than I expected." With the adrenaline fading, pain in both his sides began to make its presence known, leaving him gritting his teeth.

_Is he talking about that Prime we found in that last courtyard missing its arms and head? Spirits._ Garrus shook the thought off and practically growled his next sentence. "That's what happens when you charge through their damn lines and leave your team behind, Shepard."

"He _what?"_ Tali exclaimed as she yanked at the fastening of his breastplate urgently, shoving his hands aside when he tried to stop her. She tugged off the armor and let it bounce off the floor while Shepard laughed quietly and managed a smile, but he wasn't fooling Tali. She removed a bandage from its sterile wrapping in record time and tugged his wet shirt up. "What the hell did he do?"

Garrus sighed and shook his head. "I'll tell you about it later. I'm going to go check on your people and coordinate a pickup." He fixed Shepard with a glare for a moment before he turned and walked out of the room. Tali pressed the medigel coated bandage to Shepard's side firmly despite his wince, kneeling and gazing up at him with glowing eyes narrowed behind her visor.

"Shepard, what's he talking about?"

He shook his head and she could swear she saw a blush on his cheeks despite dim light. "Later, Tali. It's... not important. Besides, I'm fine." His weary smile didn't do much to ease her nerves, however, and she gave him a look, one she knew he was perfectly capable of understanding through her purple visor. "Oh, come on, don't give me that look." Yes, he understood all right. "You're a quarian: you always think wounds are worse than they appear when they're on other species."

"No, just the ones on you," she murmured, shaking her head and sniffing as she tossed aside the first bloody bandage and applied a fresh one to the trickling holes in his side. Her words made him smile softly and reach down to lay his hand on her shoulder, and she pulled his shirt back down. Standing, she sighed and wrapped her arms around him tightly despite his bloodstained shirt, laying her head against his shoulder. "I should have joined you back on Freedom's Progress. This mission wasn't worth... whatever it's cost." She sniffled quietly but didn't sob, instead shaking her head slowly while his hands gently stroked her back.

"Come on, Tali. Let's go see Reegar and check on your people." He would have preferred to just hold her for a while, but Garrus had made his point about responsibilities, and Tali and her people were now one of his. "We'll talk about everything once we've taken care of them, all right?" He gave her a warm smile when she raised her head and nodded silently.

Leaning down, she picked up his breastplate and helped him strap it back on before he led her back outside, slipping his hand into hers and giving it a gentle squeeze. He had a feeling she was smiling, however faintly, and led her across the bridge in a run, shielding her from the radiation for the few seconds it took to cross despite the protest from his ribs.


	19. Downtime

**Author's note:**

_Nothing dies in this one. Just a lot of downtime on the Normandy. And some comedy at the expense of poor Grunt... and Shepard. Tali has a vicious streak, it seems. As it turns out, so does Mordin.  
Like I've said before, I had a huge chunk from Haestrom on written already. Might end up being a few chapters of the crew hanging around bonding and making fun of each other and all that. Not sure what it'll do to the pacing, but I enjoyed writing it too much to let it go to waste. Some elements might get incorporated into later chapters. Not sure yet.  
_

* * *

Of the fifteen quarians that had landed, only two others besides Tali and Kal'Reegar were still alive, and they were both badly wounded. Garrus' instructions to Mordin and Kasumi to tend to any injured had saved the marines' lives and it was a thought that made the turian smile despite the weight of a less fortunate quarian he was helping Zaeed carry to their shuttle. He was one of eleven that would be returning to the fleet only for funeral rites. He turned after they laid the young man to rest with his comrades to see Mordin pursuing a limping Kal'Reegar, sternly making demands. "Still wounded, will likely develop infection. Must rest!"

Zaeed snickered as the tough marine politely but firmly refused, insisting on checking on his wounded squad members where they waited, unconscious, aboard the Normandy's Kodiak to be transported up to the medbay. "Remind you of anyone?" The mercenary pulled a flask from his belt and took a swig, offering it to Garrus who simply smirked. "Oh, right. Poor dextro bastard." Grunt lumbered up and grabbed the flask, pouring a half ounce into his maw before Zaeed growled and snatched it back.

"Yeah, he definitely reminds me of someone." Garrus folded his arms while Grunt muttered 'weak' and wandered off to look for more trouble. The young krogan had been in a mood that could only be described as 'joyous' since the end of the fight, but now he was becoming restless. In the Kodiak, Reegar carefully examined one of the women's suit damage and the patch that had been applied, stubbornly ignoring his own wounded hip.

"Who might that be, Garrus?" Shepard's quiet voice made the turian's fringe stiffen, but he only sighed and wondered how a man in heavy boots sometimes managed to sneak up behind people when witnesses swore he wasn't tiptoeing.

"Oh, just some stupid human spectre I knew." Garrus turned to give Shepard a smirking twitch of mandibles, but to his annoyance, most of his anger had cooled to amused disbelief. "So stupid, he insisted on pulling a crippled pilot to an escape pod while his ship was disintegrating around him. So stupid that he put me in command of a squad against an entire company of geth."

Garrus jumped when he heard a rough voice behind him. "From what I heard, he didn't leave you much to clean up."

Spinning, the turian saw Kal'Reegar standing calmly with hands clasped behind his back. "Are you and Shepard long-lost brothers?"

"Don't think so, sir." Reegar gazed past Garrus at the glimmering eyes of Tali who was clearly smiling. He'd had a few words with her while Shepard organized the recovery of the fallen quarians, easing the burden on her shoulders by reminding her that the command of the squad had been his. Still, she'd stubbornly tried to hold onto responsibility until he'd driven his point across just enough to make her smile just a little. "You weren't exaggerating, ma'am. Your old captain's as good as you said. Better, actually. A bit crazy, though."

"Understatement," Garrus and Zaeed both muttered before they shared a smirk. Shepard snatched the flask from the mercenary's hand and took a sip, ignoring the glare he got from mismatched eyes.

"Oh? Does this mean someone is going to finally tell me what happened?" Tali folded her arms across her chest, cocking a hip and leaning slightly toward Shepard as she did, a subtle bit of body language that didn't escape Kal's notice.

"Later." Shepard didn't resist when Zaeed snatched his flask back, chuckling quietly while he rubbed the back of his neck. Between the painkiller and the warm burn of the liquor, things were looking up, despite the conversation he'd undoubtedly have with Garrus and Miranda. "Let's get your wounded to the Normandy, Reegar. Tali and I will bring your ship into the hangar so you can ride with them."

"Appreciate that, Captain." Reegar nodded and limped away toward the Kodiak while Zaeed whistled loudly and Garrus signaled for the squad to rally. Everyone but Shepard and Tali piled into the Kodiak and shut the hatch, leaving the two to watch while it lifted off.

When it was out of sight, Tali slid her arms around him with a deep sigh, feeling his arms enfolding her in his warmth. They were content to just stand there in the shade while Dholen finally began to dip below the horizon until Tali finally whispered to him. "You did something stupid today, didn't you? Just so you can add another notch to, what was it? Your 'rescued damsels' list?"

"Me? Never." He still wasn't looking forward to giving her the full story, but neither did he regret the outcome now that she was safe in his arms and he could hear her voice.

"Liar. If you don't tell me what happened, I'm not giving you your present." She gave him a tight squeeze and heard him hiss reflexively. Pulling away, she gazed down at his bloody armor and her fingers were suddenly entwining at her waist again. "I'm sorry, I forgot about... wait, why are we still standing here?"

He managed a chuckle while he pressed a hand to the side that hadn't taken a shot. "That wasn't you. I think I cracked a couple of ribs when I charged that colossus and took a hit from one of its legs." Uh oh. It was as if here eyes were rising in slow motion to his own, and he could tell she'd be folding her arms... yes, there they went. "Really, Tali. I'll be fine... wait, what present?"

She sighed and shook her head, taking his hand and pulling him along with her into the quarian shuttle. She tried not to stare at the shrouded bodies of her team as she made her way to the pilot's seat and sealed the hatch. Shepard had to wriggle to fit his more broadly armored frame into the narrow copilot's seat. "When we're on your ship and you're patched up, then _maybe_ you'll get it." Her fingers flew over the controls as the engines started and she gave him a sidelong grin, unable to stay mad at him when she saw those blue eyes on hers and the smile on his lips.

* * *

"So Grunt is the krogan, Jack is the human who hates clothes, Kasumi is the one with the hood, Zaeed is the one with the scars, Mordin is the salarian, and Miranda and Jacob are the Cerberus _bosh'tets._" Tali's review was accurate and the venom in her voice obvious when she spoke the name of the terrorist organization.

"You got it," Shepard replied, "but I trust Jacob. He's a good man. Miranda... I think she's coming around, but she's still loyal to the Illusive Man. A work in progress." He turned to give her a reassuring smile, one that eased her mind a bit more as she took the shuttle toward the glimmer of light that was his ship.

She hadn't been happy to hear that he was playing nice with the Illusive Man, but she couldn't argue with his logic. Pretending to grow to trust the reclusive tycoon seemed dangerous, but also safer than constantly butting heads with the man. She reached over and squeezed his hand in hers with a smile. "Okay, Shepard. I trust you, you know that. Now..." When her voice trailed off, he followed her gaze out the cockpit window and grinned at the sight she was taking in. "Keelah! That's... impossible! It's... no, it's not. What?"

He couldn't help but laugh, taking the controls to slow them and bring them in a slow loop toward the hangar doors at the underbelly of the ship. "I told you you wouldn't have to fix up my 'junker', as you put it. The drive core's three times as big as the old Tantalus, she's twice as big, but half again as fast. And she has some mean teeth now."

Tali couldn't tear her gaze away from the sleek lines that were so familiar but so different to her trained eye and her head was shaking slowly. "How did Cerberus do this?"

"By being devious, underhanded, rich, and evil, I imagine. Joker can tell you more about her construction and upgrades." He brought the quarian shuttle slowly into the hangar, keeping a careful eye on the third-person projection of the ship. It was a snug fit, but doable even for him.

"Keelah. I'm going to keep you awake all night."

"Oh?"

She blinked and turned to glare at the innocent smile he was giving her, ignoring the heat that rose to her cheeks. "You... I... that wasn't what I meant. There's a lot to catch up on."

He shut down the engines and unfastened his harness, standing with a tired grin. "Very true. First, I need a shower."

She practically leaped out of her seat and grabbed him by the collar of his armor. "Oh, no. First you're heading to the medbay, and if you argue with me I'm sabotaging your shower to spray engine oil instead of water."

"Remind me never to get wounded with you around again."

* * *

"Joker!" Tali's spirits were already high, between being reunited with Shepard and Garrus and being aboard an even more advanced version of the Normandy, but they rose just a bit more at the sight of the lopsided grin on the bearded face and she walked over to give him a hug despite the awkward and cautious way he returned it.

"Long time no see, but watch the ribs. I sneezed earlier." He grinned when she pulled away, turning toward Shepard. "She's smirking under the helmet, isn't she?"

Shepard smiled and folded his arms across his chest. It was common knowledge among the old crew that he'd been the only one who could really read Tali's expressions through her body language, and he nodded. "She is. She knows you're not _that_ weak, Joker."

"_Bosh'tet,_" Tali laughed, giving Joker a light swat on his arm. "You can tell me what's going on after Shepard gets patched up." Grabbing the commander's forearm, she tugged him toward the medbay where she saw Chakwas and Mordin attending to the two wounded while Kal'Reegar stood out of the way to the side, cutting up suit patches inside a sterilization field.

"Tali, I can wait until they're finished with your team." His voice was firm as he came to a stop outside the doors despite her tugging and she turned on him, sighing audibly and gazing up at him with her fingers entwining at her waist.

"Shepard, please... I worry about you, and I know you were hurting. Just stop being a stubborn _bosh'tet_ and... do it for me, okay?"

The subtle slump of her shoulders and the little droop of her head would have been enough for him, but the little dance her fingers were doing truly sealed the deal. He smiled warmly. "Well, that's as good a reason as any. But if you try to make me sleep after, you're in for disappointment." He ignored her smirk and folded arms while he reached up and tapped the keypad, but it buzzed at him in refusal.

"We're in quarantine here." Chakwas' voice was clipped and terse and he knew that meant she was in full doctor mode.

"But Shepard was shot!" Tali protested, her frustration evident in her voice while the commander only chuckled quietly and grinned at her from behind.

"Shot? Garrus said all critical patients were in medbay. Must not be life-threatening. Tell him to come to window and show me the wound. Will provide guidance for self-treatment." Mordin's voice was as efficiently hurried as Karin's but there was a note of happiness in it. Shepard understood, though. Mordin always enjoyed a good challenge, one that tested his blisteringly fast mind and hands.

"Stupid _bosh'tet._ I'm going to strangle him," Tali muttered, grabbing Shepard's hand and tugging him along with her around to the windows in the mess hall where they saw the two doctors working on the injured marines.

"I think he wanted me to suffer," Shepard began unfastening his armor, ignoring the pain in his side from his ribs. His implants seemed to eat through even painkillers at a prodigious rate. Tali wasn't fooled, though and grabbed his arms, shoving them down to his side before she took on the clasps herself.

"I'm going to strangle him, and then I'm going to beat him to death with that rifle he probably sleeps with." Tali was still muttering while she finished on one side and moved to the other. Shepad just stood there, shrugging helplessly over at Gardner, Miranda, and Joker who were all watching with amusement.

"Wow, Tali, I've never seen you so... Shepard-like. He's really rubbed off on you," Joker quipped before he took another bite of a chocolate bar.

"Unsurprising. Quarians fiercely protective of their mates." Mordin chimed in without even glancing over, his hands a blur while they worked inside a quarian abdomen repairing a bullet's damage. He was oblivious to the way Tali's hands suddenly jerked and then stopped moving in shock at the salarian's words. Rupert and Joker hid their snickers behind their hands and Miranda hid her frown by turning and walking into her office. Shepard was wise enough to keep his mouth shut, though his blue eyes sparkled with amusement.

"He's – he's not my... it's not like that," Tali muttered, jerking the last clasp free as she breastplate fell to the deck. She kicked it aside and whether by intention or chance, it bounced off Joker's ankle and he yanked his foot back.

"Ow! Hey! I'm not the one who shot your m... uh... commander." The glare Tali shot him stopped the pilot cold. "Uh... I'm just gonna go, you know, fly the ship or something." Joker quickly limped away while Gardner make a show of turning and rummaging through the cabinets.

"_Bosh'tets,_ all of them." Tali yanked Shepard's snug black shirt up until he lifted his arms to pull it off. To his credit, he only breathed a quiet hiss at the pain in his side before he tossed the shirt atop his breastplate with a splat of wetness.

"No, Tali, you can't disembowel him. Just think of him as your annoying brother or something." He gave her an encouraging smile, but she was too busy prying off his bandage to notice, tossing it with his breastplate and shirt before she called to Mordin.

"Okay, um.. Mordin." Tali stepped out of the line of sight and wrung her fingers at her waist while Shepard stood there obediently, his arm raised to expose the wound to Mordin's critical eye.

"Blood flow ceased, medigel application quite thorough. Through-and-through wound, shallow. Yes, very good. Clean with antiseptic and reapply medigel, then rebandage. Will be quite satisfactory for now." Mordin began singing quietly to himself while he worked, leaving Tali to frown behind her visor.

"I think he broke a rib or two, though. What about that?"

"No no, no break, no internal damage. Skin not swollen, would have been in far more pain when lifting arm. Most likely cracked or heavily bruised. Soothe pain with two hundred milligrams of Norazipine, cold compress. Fully stocked medkit on deck one, recommend you use waterproof bandage and have him shower. Removal of blood will ease worries. Go now, much to do here."

Shepard could tell Tali was blushing furiously, but she was quick to nod and grab his hand, tugging him toward the elevator while he laughed and followed, calling back to Mordin. "Wait a minute. Why are you telling her all this and not me?" Kasumi let out a wolf whistle from the doorway to the lounge at the sight of the shirtless spectre, earning her a glare from Tali and a smirk from the commander.

Mordin's voice came over the comm as they moved out of earshot and stepped into the elevator. "_You are stubborn patient. More likely to cede to Tali'Zorah's demands than my own."_ They heard the salarian sniff indignantly. _"Should have known movements of lower eyelids were not suggestive. Relieved, but also slightly disappointed. Would have been intriguing insight into human mating practices. Oh well. New opportunity to study human-quarian mating practices instead. New experience, quite exciting!"_

Over the comm they heard Karin and Kal'Reegar break out into laughter. Shepard just stared at the comm panel while Tali's head dropped and she muttered. "Oh, keelah..."

* * *

_"I'm not sure I see the problem, Miranda."_

"I agree, sir," Jacob seconded as he and Miranda stood side by side in the middle of the lowered conference room table.

The Normandy's XO had brought Jacob with her to the debrief, knowing the lieutenant had more insight into Shepard's character than she did. It was something that both annoyed her and left her a touch envious. But she stood her ground with a shake of her head and the sway of black tresses. "We are talking about _Shepard_ here, aren't we? The same man that's regarded among the Alliance and even the Spectres as one of the finest small-unit tacticians and combat officers in the history of both organizations? And he just gave up command to Vakarian without a second thought."

While the Illusive Man's glowing blue eyes fixed her with a gaze that made her shift her feet slightly, Jacob shook his head. "It wasn't like that. He was perceptive enough to know he wasn't in the best frame of mind to be making tough decisions."

Miranda rolled her eyes and folded her arms across her chest. "My point exactly. Whatever his feelings for the quarian, when have his feelings ever gotten in the way of his decision-making? Not to mention his behavior since he awoke has been more erratic than our psych profiles and his history projected."

The Illusive Man's chuckle surprised her, and he gave her a faint smile while he stubbed out his cigarette. _"That wasn't unexpected. As I recall, you and Jacob were at odds over whether he'd even listen to you before he pulled the trigger at the mention of Cerberus. The Collector involvement was hardly enough for him to overcome his distrust of us." _He picked up his glass and took a sip, holding up his other palm to forestall her rebuttal. _"Yes, __leaving Agent Rawlings to his fate wasn't encouraging, but he hasn't exterminated the crew and tried to take the ship for himself either. But back to your original objection. Yes, I would have been more comfortable if he'd simply put his feelings aside and focused on the mission, but he did the next best thing. And from what I've seen so far of the krogan's omni-tool recordings, the upgrades we gave him have been put to... good use."_

Jacob chuckled and murmured just loud enough for them to hear. "You can say that again." While Miranda gave him a cold stare, he simply returned it with a smile. "Come on, Miranda. You saw it yourself. He got a handle on the charge and his barrier strength in record time and took down a colossus with a brilliant move."

"Reckless is more like it." Her rebuttal wasn't unexpected, and the Illusive Man concealed an amused smirk behind the rim of his glass, letting them argue it out. Despite the rocky relationship between Jacob and him, the younger man had good instincts, even if he didn't voice them often. "He nearly got himself and Grunt killed. If they hadn't rushed ahead, it would have taken us only a few minutes longer to clear out the geth."

"You think he doesn't know that? He also knew a lot could happen in a few minutes."

_"You both make valid points, but don't forget the impact that having both Vakarian and Tali'Zorah aboard will have on him, not to mention Moreau and Chakwas. I imagine you won't be quite as concerned about erratic behavior from here on in. If T'Soni is available when you reach Illium, all the better. Her investigation into the Shadow Broker may also end up working to our advantage."_ Draining the remaining whiskey from his glass, the Illusive Man tapped a few buttons on the console of his chair. _"Reports indicate the Justicar and the assassin are both still on Illium and will in all likelihood be there a while longer. I've transferred some more funds. Find what upgrades you can. Jacob, we're putting together a cargo drop with the materials you asked for. Let me know if you have trouble finding a port to perform the upgrades and I'll look into it. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have other matters to attend to."_

The holographic image dissipated before either could reply, a not-so-subtle reminder to them to work out their bickering without involving their boss. It made Miranda frown, but Jacob folded his arms and smirked at her. "You sure you're not just jealous Shepard picked Garrus instead of you?"

The glare he received could have melted the Silaris armor he was planning to have installed, but that expression no longer fazed him. "Don't be ridiculous, Jacob. Garrus has more experience fighting geth than I do. It was a-"

"Proper and logical tactical decision?" At the sight of her faltering frown, he chuckled and turned, leading her toward the door. "My point exactly, Miss Lawson. Come on, I could use something to eat."

The beginnings of a smile twitched on her lips while she followed him out, but she suppressed them quickly. She'd always beat her friend soundly in chess and other games, but somehow he often managed to outwit her in arguments of logic. Small wonder people often underestimated him.

* * *

"Believe me, I have no idea how my lower eyelids could be... 'suggestive'. Shepard's voice was a tired murmur as he lay prone upon the couch, adjusting the position of his head on his folded arms. The towel beneath him was stained red with blood, as were Tali's gloves, but Mordin had been correct in his unconcerned diagnosis, and cleaning the red liquid from his sides was soothing her nerves.

"Maybe it's a salarian thing," Tali mused, her fingers swabbing gently with cotton around the edges of the bandage she'd carefully applied. She'd been surprised when he'd dozed off mere seconds after lying down: even after the battle that had stretched from Ilos to the Citadel, he'd had enough energy to debrief the Council, check on the Normandy and all of its crew, and meet with Anderson and Hackett. Chakwas had finally been forced to come retrieve him and order him to the medbay, and the glare Shepard had given the trio of concerned females made them all laugh. She'd been relieved to see him head off to rest, but this time she found herself disappointed at his sleepiness and a wicked grin curled her lips behind her visor. "Mordin's kind of handsome, though. Hmm... I wonder if he likes quarians..."

_"What!?"_

It took a great deal of willpower to avoid a fit of giggles as she gazed into Shepard's blue eyes, now wide awake and staring. She shrugged innocently and continued her cleansing. His expression of shock slowly melted into a smirk and he sat up, folding his arms across his bare chest. "Very funny, Miss Zorah."

She couldn't help but smile wide while she wiped her hands clean and sat up straight at the edge of the table, curling her fingers around its edge. "You didn't seem amused when you yelled at me. Is there something wrong, Commander?"

Her voice was amused but it held a soft, sultry note in it that made his heart skip a beat. She looked incredibly beautiful in her new suit, and he found his eyes drawn to the gap between her arms and body where her hips curved in deeply toward her narrow waist. Shaking his head to clear it, he gazed back up to her eyes to find them focused on his body and not his face, raising slowly instead of jumping back up to his eyes. For once, he couldn't tell if she was blushing behind that visor of hers.

"Commander?" she restated playfully. He smirked, using the expression as a cover for the debate that suddenly started taking place in his mind. Despite their time apart, he hadn't really spent much time considering whether it was a foolish idea to get involved with a woman who could get terribly sick – or worse- from a single kiss.

_Hell with it._ He smiled and reached out and lightly swatted her thigh. "You shouldn't tease your old captain like that. You're well aware he did something stupid today just to wrap his arms around you again."

Tali giggled, enjoying the playful banter and the warmth that rose to her cheeks while she cocked her head to the side inquisitively, resisting the urge to hop onto his lap and slide her arms around him. "Why did he do that? And just what was this stupid thing he did, anyways?"

He paused for a moment before shaking his head and standing. "He'll tell you after he takes a shower and gets out of these bloody clothes." He started to turn but stopped and took one of her hands in his, lifting it to press a kiss to the back of her glove before he gave her a smile and headed over toward the stairs and the washroom.

"Stubborn _bosh'tet._ Fine, I'll be here. Just let me know if you need any help." She snickered quietly while her cheeks burned even hotter. She knew all the adrenaline and happiness of the day was making her uncharacteristically bold, but it was just so much _fun._ Especially when he stopped in his tracks and turned to stare at her with a slight color in his cheeks. _Keelah, I made Commander Shepard blush. I'm awesome!_ "..What?" she asked innocently as they stared across the room at each other. "I'll call Garrus if you need a hand."

As she broke out into a fit of giggling laughter, he just shook his head and chuckled, turning back around to enter the washroom. Tali grinned wide when she heard him mutter 'Oh, keelah' before the door slid shut behind him and left her to her own devices. Standing, she bounced lightly on her toes while she looked around the room, the fish tank catching her eye. She watched the multicolored animals swim about for a few moments before the large bed caught her eye. The sheets looked really soft...

A minute later she was blushing furiously while she turned to scurry out of the room before her imagination ran wild. Still, on her way down to the hangar, her mind returned to thoughts of cool sheets on her skin and the warmth of a firm body pressing her tightly down into them.

* * *

When the doors to the hangar bay opened, she hurried out but ran right into Kal'Reegar, who cursed and dropped the box he was carrying, tubes of nutrient paste clattering out on the deck. "Oh, keelah! I'm sorry, Kal, I was... distracted." The sight of him still working despite the wound he was nursing and the two members of his squad up in the medbay made her head hang in sudden shame. How had she let herself get distracted and happy when the majority of their team was lying cold in their shuttle?

She knelt swiftly to put the tubes back into the box before he could, instinctively trying to hide the blush she knew he'd be able to pick up on. To her relief, he simply knelt across from her with a warm laugh and helped retrieve the scattered cargo. "Not a problem, ma'am. I'm sure you were just deep in thought about the new ship or fancy engines or something else completely unrelated to the captain."

Her embarrassment returned just as quickly as it had faded and she muttered at him. "_Bosh'tet._"

"Thank you, ma'am. I try." He dropped the last tube into the box and stood, tucking it back under his arm while he took one of her hands in his, pulling her to her feet. "I can see why even your father resisted the urge to shoot him. Good man, if a little reckless."

Tali gazed down at the fingers that were writhing together at her waist. "I... I know. But a few minutes ago I was so happy, while most of our squad is covered up in the shuttle and I'm leaving the fleet just to... keelah, what's wrong with me?"

"I think it's called 'love', ma'am. More dangerous than a suit rupture, but a lot more fun." Her laugh was brief and quiet, so the perceptive squad leader kept going. "But you told me about the Reapers, remember? Shepard's not the only reason you're on this ship." Her head lifted, an encouraging sign. "Besides, ma'am. If I was one of the ones lying on our shuttle, I'd want you to be happy to be alive, not treating my sacrifice like some sort of burden."

Those familiar words sent a jolt through her before she finally managed a smile, reaching out to squeeze his arm gently. "Garrus was right about you. Shepard said the same thing once."

"Don't know about that, ma'am. I just shoot things." Still, he grinned behind his visor at the compliment. "Sounds like he knows what he's talking about, though. Now, go relax for a while."

"I will in a minute. Be right back."

He watched her walk over to the shuttle while he leaned against the bulkhead to take the weight off his injured hip with a quiet sigh. Tali had always tried to put more of the weight on her shoulders than was necessary, a trait he'd figured she'd picked up from her father. It was a frequent battle getting her to remove some of that burden, and sometimes a tiresome one, but the brightness in her eyes and the spring in her step when she stepped off the shuttle made it worth it. The sight of a familiar black strap slung diagonally across her chest made him chuckle.

"You've carried that thing everywhere for as long as I've known you. Can I finally know what it is?"

Tali shook her head with a smile, hitting the panel to open the elevator. "Not yet, but you might find out later."

"Bah. Fine... ma'am."

* * *

Jack had been ready to blast an ugly krogan head clean off its shoulders when Grunt had come rumbling down the stairs into her subdeck, demanding to know how he could become a biotic, but Zaeed had followed with scotch and she exercised some self-restraint, yanking the bottle away and taking a swig despite his protests. Now the mercenary leaned against the edge of the table across from where she sat on her cot, Grunt listening with rapt attention like a kindergartner during story time from his place on the floor.

"So these two batarians are laughing and slugging away at my stomach while I'm hanging by my wrists when I twist and one of them breaks a finger on a rib. The other squint just started laughing while the first one was howling and turned his back just long enough for me to wrap my legs around his neck and snap it like a twig." Zaeed grinned and passed the bottle back to Jack, who wasn't hiding her interest very well behind a mask of boredom. "The first one blinks and pulls out a goddamn little pigsticker of a knife, but I kicked it right out of his hand and into one of his eyes. Heh. Even asari whores have never squealed so loud as that squint did, I tell ya."

Jack rolled her eyes while Grunt looked on in confusion. "Why would you waste time killing prostitutes? They can't be much of a challenge."

Jack finally burst into laughter while Zaeed just stared at Grunt hopelessly, shaking his head. "Damn, pup, remind me to take you to the lower levels of Illium when we get there. You'll figure it out."

While the biotic continued to laugh at Grunt's expense, the krogan growled and shook his head. "Waste of time. There won't be any good fights on an asari planet. We should go to Omega or Tuchanka. Can't believe the turian actually had a good idea and picked a fight with all the merc groups at once. Ha!" Grunt slammed his fists together and stood. "Come on, let's go to the hangar and fight. Bring the small one, too. I'll try to get Shepard down there."

"Yeah, good luck with that, pup," Zaeed laughed. "I wouldn't bother him tonight if you don't want to have your fool head ripped off."

Grunt looked puzzled again and Jack rolled her eyes as she hopped to her feet and stuck her pistol on her belt. "I still say you and the thief are out of your fucking minds. Like any man who's still breathing would be interested in someone stuck in an envirosuit over some easy Cerberus bitch in a tight catsuit."

Zaeed snickered and led her toward the stairs while he yanked the bottle from her hand and took a swig. "Shepard spends a lot of time with the ice queen, but you never know. Maybe I'll start up a little betting pool."

As they disappeared up the stairs, Grunt scratched at an itch on his developing brow plate, contemplating for a moment before he spoke up.

"Hey! Ship!"

_"Yes, Grunt?"_

"What the hell were they talking about?"

_"I am forwarding your inquiry to Yeoman Chambers. Please hold."_

* * *

_I hope he's still in the shower._ Tali peered into the cabin when the door slid open and smiled when she heard the water running through the bulkhead. Stepping inside, she looked around for a moment before she hurried over to the bed and removed the object from her back, sliding it beneath the sheets and rumpling them up to hide the outline. That done, she walked over to the couch and crumpled up the bloodstained towel, staring at it with some puzzlement. What did other species do with their soiled clothes, anyways? It took her a few minutes before she found the compartment beneath Shepard's armor and clothes locker, dumping the towel into a bag before she returned to the couch and peered at the collection of bottles and glasses beneath the table.

_Hmm.. wine? Just who has Shepard been entertaining up here?_ She felt an uncomfortable tightening of her stomach at the thought, remembering the ridiculously tight outfit the Cerberus woman wore, but she distracted herself with translating the labels on the bottles. A few were opened, but an older turian vintage sported a handwritten message written on it with a marker. '_Garrus, don't you dare touch this one or you'll be stuck using nothing but a shotgun for a week.'_

Tali laughed and pulled it out with a smile. _He saved this one for me, didn't he? Sweet bosh'tet._ She set it on the table and pulled out an asari vintage whose label looked familiar. It reminded her of a bottle Liara had shared with Shepard, Ash, and Kaidan while they'd all sat in the mess hall, laughing and trading stories and omni-tool recordings of some of their missions for the benefit of the squad members that hadn't been present. The thought of Liara brought a frown to her lips, so she thought of Wrex instead, smiling at the memory of the old, tough krogan carrying her so gently through the Citadel after he, Garrus, and Ashley had landed and rushed up to the council chambers to help them to a presidium hospital.

"Tali?" Shepard's voice called from the door and she turned to smile at him through the glass display case that housed half a dozen model ships. He was leaning out from one side of the door with a sheepish smile. "Can you toss me a towel?"

Grinning, Tali just reclined against the couch and draped an arm over its back. "Sorry, but I'm very comfortable here."

"Very funny. Come on, all the warm air is escaping! And you're supposed to be nice to the wounded."

"Mordin said you're fine. And I watched you take those painkillers. Don't worry, I'll close my eyes."

The silver glow of her eyes narrowed to a crack behind her visor, watching him smirk and shake his head. "You're a pain in the ass." He reached out toward his armor locker with a concentrating squint, hand glowing with blue before one of the drawers slid open quickly and promptly fell onto the floor with a crash, spilling towels and washcloths. He sighed. "Damnit," he muttered while Tali laughed.

"I thought your biotics were weak, not overpowered," she teased, crossing a leg over the other. "Are you nervous about something?"

His blue eyes glimmered though his lips kept on smirking. "They've... gotten better. Now come on, Tali, don't make me beg. I'm freezing!"

Laughing, Tali uncrossed her legs and stood, walking to the pile and picking up one of the smaller towels before she turned and smiled at him. "Begging sounds fun. Go right ahead."

Shepard's lips finally broke free of their smirk and he wiped a bead of water from his eyebrow, laughing and shaking his head. "What happened to the sweetheart girl I knew two years ago? You're evil."

Tali set a hand on a cocked hip and slung the towel over her shoulder. "You still haven't told me why Garrus was angry with you and why Kal called you reckless. And you went and died on me. And you're getting a present despite that! I'm not going to make this easy on you, Shepard."

While he'd adored the sweet girl he'd known two weeks... years... ago, he found himself grinning wide at the playful teasing and the carefree happiness she'd displayed in the last half hour. It seemed that stammering shyness had fallen into balance with the rest of her, and he'd returned to find a matured woman. Laughing, he threw up his free hand helplessly. "Okay, fine. I give up. What does your heart desire, Miss Zorah?"

Tali paused for a long moment, beaming at him behind her visor before she tossed the towel to him and spoke with that warm, almost sultry tone he'd heard earlier. "For you to get dressed so I can give you your present. So hurry up!" She turned away from him to return to the couch, hopping down onto it with a cushioned bounce and a grin. She liked the furniture. She nestled back into the soft cushions and began humming while she stared up at the stars through the skylight and the swirling blue aura of the Normandy's mass effect field. She'd been so worried that things would be awkward or she'd be facing hatred around every corner on the Cerberus-crewed ship, but things were merely... different. And different in this case was turning out to be a lot of fun.

"I should have asked for a shirt and a pair of pants, too. And a larger towel." His voice interrupted her reverie and she saw him giving her an accusing smirk while he padded across the cabin with bare feet, short black hair still dripping and his bare torso glistening with moisture. One hand kept a cautious hand on the knot of the towel at his waist. "You did that on purpose."

Tali blushed, but she was smiling while she gazed at him. He was so... firm. And muscled. And broad. And... keelah. She had to swallow before answering, shrugging while he opened a drawer and pulled out some clothes. "I... I was just being... efficient. A large towel would be, um... unnecessary. And wasteful."

"You're still a terrible liar, Tali. Back in a minute."

Her eyes didn't leave him until the washroom door slid shut and she wasn't even aware of her foot tapping rapidly on the deck or her wriggling fingers. Her fidgeting stopped when he reemerged from the washroom in black pants and socks, his torso and hair mostly dried. And he was still smirking at her while he walked to his drawers and pulled out a fresh black shirt, tugging it on. "Why didn't you get a shirt when you first came out?" Tali teased, still blushing but enjoying the warmth in her cheeks.

He checked the bandage on his side before he tucked in the shirt and rolled his eyes, turning to his armor locker and pulling a black top off a hangar. "Because I don't usually have to worry about who's sitting on my couch leering at me."

"I was not... leering!" Tali protested, though she was watching intently while he fastened the strip of white on one side of the black jacket. Her brows rose at the sight of the tailored, formal top and its elegant high collar. He looked rather dashing in it. "Besides, between that outfit and the wine, who knows who you've been entertaining up here?"

The subtle hint of jealousy in her voice made him smile and he walked over to the bed, sitting. Tali's heart skipped a beat at his proximity to her concealed present, but he just reached under the bed and pulled out a glossy pair of short boots. "Most everyone, I think, except Jack and Grunt. No krogan on the furniture. Why, Miss vas Neema? Are you worried about something?"

_"Bosh'tet,"_ she muttered. "That Miranda doesn't know the meaning of the word 'loose'."

Laughing, he started lacing his other boot. "Neither do you." He shot her a wink and got a nearly concealed blush as a reward.

"A loose suit could snag on something... and it would be harder to seal. It's just... efficient."

"Well, you look beautiful. Your new suit is lovely." His warm words made her lift her head and smile, ready to thank him, but he was gazing over his shoulder at his rumpled sheets with an arched brow. He always left the bed made crisply. "Don't tell me quarians jump on the bed." He turned back to her with a grin, noticing the twiddling of her fingers and the subtle slump of her shoulders.

"Jump on the captain's bed? That's... that would be so... I don't get it." Her fingers began entwining furiously, giving the commander some insight into where her mind had wandered. Laughing, he stood.

"Human kids jump up and down on beds for fun, but I guess damaging a bed would be worth some serious punishment for a quarian child." He took another look at the sheets, making Tali start. "So what were you doing, then?"

She stood and grabbed his hand, pointing him to the couch. "Sit down and close your eyes. It's time for your present... no, no arguing! Just sit!" She put her hands on his chest and pushed him down for good measure before she turned toward the bed and he grinned when her back was turned, dutifully closing his eyes. Glancing over her shoulder, satisfied there was no hint of blue irises, she peeled back the sheets and picked up the black object she'd hidden. Carrying it back to the couch, she took a seat on the table across from him and gazed down at the item on her lap. Her happy anticipation also came with a little regret as she ran her fingertips across what had been her only physical reminder of him for two years, but her selfless quarian nature reasserted itself and she set it gently on his lap. Taking his hands, she set them atop the smooth leather and smiled, whispering. "Okay. You can open your eyes now."

When his eyes opened, they quickly drifted down to his lap and his entire body suddenly froze while his lips parted in shock. Tali felt tears brimming in her eyes while she sat watching him, resting her fingers atop his hands and waiting through the long moment it took him to respond. His voice was nearly breathless while he brushed his fingers over the leather. "Tali... you..."

He raised his eyes to hers, swallowing, but she just smiled and nodded at the case, slipping her hands away. His fingers moved hesitantly to the two latches at the side, different than he remembered. More secure, polished brightly. He twisted the knobs slowly and folded the latches open before he took a deep breath and opened the case. His breath escaped his lips in some cross between a laugh and a sob, and he closed his eyes a moment too late to stop a tear from falling onto the smooth wood of the violin he'd forgotten about but Tali had carried for two years.

* * *

Tali imagined the sight of tears running down Commander Shepard's cheeks would be a sight as baffling as a two-kilometer dreadnought shaped like a crustacean to almost anyone in the galaxy except Anderson and his mother, but she was smiling while she held his head to her shoulder and squeezed his hand in hers upon her lap. It had been only a couple of weeks since he'd awoken on a cold Cerberus table, life upended, and he'd been given no time before he was thrown right back into the fray. It was hardly fair, and from what limited amount of information Garrus had included about Shepard in his extranet messages, she'd started to get worried about him. Now, though, as he quietly let it out, she was content to hold him and squeeze his hand in hers.

It was only a couple of minutes before he lifted his head and she saw him smiling down at his old instrument, shaking his head slowly while he spoke in a calm whisper. "Tali, you don't know what it means that you... thank you."

Smiling, she drew his head back onto her shoulder and nuzzled her hood against his hair, wishing it was her cheek that rubbed him. "Yes, I do."

He laughed quietly and shook his head slightly, gazing down at the leather case and smooth wood. "I can't believe you held onto it for two years."

"See that strap? I carried it with me everywhere... well, almost everywhere." She wished he could see her smile, but she had a feeling he knew how wide it was. He always did.

He took in the sight of the strong but elegant strap, the new and stronger latches she'd installed, and the worn but lovingly polished leather, trying to picture Tali bumping around the narrow corridors of the Neema with a violin strapped to her back and drawing odd gazes. "You must have attracted a lot of strange looks."

She laughed. "A lot. My father always disapproved of carrying around some mystery object that never got any use, but the one time he tried to get me to get rid of it, I almost pulled my shotgun." She giggled at the memory and smiled at the warm look Shepard gave her. "I tried to give it some use, but..." She held up a hand with a thumb and two fingers, and he laughed.

"I told you those extra digits came in handy." Lifting his head, he closed the case and set it gently on the table before he turned to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer and laying his forehead against her visor with closed eyes. "I can't thank you enough, Tali."

"You just did," she murmured, raising her hands to his cheeks and caressing them softly, ignoring the faint scars her fingertips were grazing over. She wanted to say more, but... _Not yet. Not from behind a mask._

"Tali, I-"

"You're hungry? Me too." She smiled and slipped from his embrace, standing. "Come on, let's go check on Kal and the others and get something to eat. You can drag me back up here later for a drink and some music."

Her sudden focus on her stomach didn't fool him, but he knew she wasn't embarrassed, and so he stood and smiled at her with a warmth she'd never quite seen before. "It's a date. I'll even throw in dinner and a movie."

She laughed happily and slipped a hand into his as they headed toward the door. "Oh, keelah, as long as it isn't another one of those Jayne Bomb movies. Those gadget things were so unrealistic."

"It's James Bond, Miss Zorah. And you always missed the point." He wiped a lingering drop of moisture from his eye and grinned when she bumped him with her hip hard enough to bounce him lightly off the door frame.

"Right. Just don't tell me he's your hero. My captain doesn't get a new woman for every mission."

"What makes you think he'd want that?"

Tali pressed the button for deck three a split second before she yelped and found herself spun and pulled into a tight embrace that made her blush and swallow while Shepard smiled down at her with an arched brow. Damn the man, she wouldn't let him distract her from her teasing. Grinning, she shrugged her shoulders and set her hands on his waist. "I saw the way you looked at Liara, and that game we played in the hangar?"

"Oh, come on!"

Tali's laughter at the sight of his coloring cheeks drowned out his protests.


	20. Dinner and a movie

**Author's note:**

_Sorry for the long delay. Spent a lot of time debating just what to do with all the stuff I had written. What to keep, what to trim, what to change, concerns about pacing, etc. Took a break to clear my head before I finally I said screw it and ceased worrying so much about it. Cut out a couple thousand words of a section that didn't quite fit, added a couple others, but it's pretty true to the original stuff I wrote months ago. Hope you enjoy. Especially the tortures I sadistically enjoy putting Shepard and Tali through._

* * *

The deep exhalation of breath and the relaxed slump of Rael'Zorah's shoulders did not go unnoticed by his team, but they'd learned enough to keep out of the admiral's affairs. Still, Rael drew a few curious gazes while the tension drained from him after a day that had consisted of him snapping orders and throwing out criticisms without provocation. So as he sat at his desk in the lab reading studiously from his omni-tool, the technicians and scientists traded looks of relief at having their old boss back. He was not a charming or pleasant man, but he was fair and knew when they needed breaks from their work, even if he seemed to never leave the lab. When the tension suddenly returned to him only half a minute later, muffled sighs and mutterings were kept from the admiral's ears by silenced vocal emitters.

* * *

The Illusive Man tapped ash from his cigarette and watched the feed from the Normandy's mess hall where half the ground team was gathered. It was a strange sight. Miranda and Jacob were speaking with Vakarian between sips of their drinks. Goto was telling a story with animated gestures where she sat atop the table, and Chakwas, Moreau, and the quarian marine were laughing and listening with rapt attention. Chambers, Donnelly, and Daniels were having their own conversation by the medbay window with Solus, who was rapidly tapping away at a console working on studies of the quarian immune system. And when he switched to the hangar feed, he watched a krogan being bounced off a bulkhead by biotic force while lifting a meaty arm to block a punch from a scarred mercenary. Despite the ferocity of the attacks, Grunt was laughing and Jack had a wicked little grin on her lips.

He was a man who didn't mourn the absence of a circle of comrades or friends to share his time with, but he could appreciate the crew's interactions. Even Miranda had agreed that Shepard's more relaxed command style was well-suited to a crew on a strange mission that led them around the galaxy, often lacking clearly defined goals. Delegation was something that didn't appear to bother the commander, unlike the founder of Cerberus. Of course, after so many failed projects, he'd begun to keep a closer eye on all of his organization's affairs.

He muted the sound and returned his attentions to the datapad in his hand concerning Project Overlord. He was confident that the favor he had done for Rael'Zorah would be returned. He hadn't really left the admiral much choice, after all. The information he could provide on the geth just might be enough for the breakthrough the project needed.

* * *

"Okay, fine, I admit it. Now will you stop-"

Shepard and Tali came to a sudden stop when they rounded the corner on deck three to see almost a dozen people gazing their way.

"Admit what, Shepard?" Joker inquired as he took a bite out of another chocolate bar.

"It's a quarian thing. You wouldn't understand. Right, Reegar?"

"Right, sir." The marine answered without missing a beat despite having no idea what they'd been talking about.

Tali blushed, once more grateful for the visor as she made her way toward the kitchen area where Gardner was chopping potatoes with a large knife at a speed that made the immunodeficient woman stare in amazement. His fingers were only a few millimeters from the blade at times, but he seemed oblivious. A quiet sigh of envy escaped her lips while she ignored Joker's nosy questions and opened a cabinet to pull out a tube of nutrient paste from the cache Kal had stocked it with.

"Commander, were you being teased by a woman you outweigh by a good thirty-five kilos?" Tali turned to see Shepard smirking at his mother hen of a doctor where he stood, arms folded, leaning against a bulkhead.

"I can't help it. It's just too much fun." Tali blinked her eyes sweetly over at her commander, who rolled his.

"Indeed. Enjoyed it myself," Mordin chimed in over the comm from the medbay, looking up from his console to give Shepard that little grin that turned his expression from a perpetual frown into something that always made people nervous.

"_Bosh'tet_," Shepard muttered a split second before the galley erupted with laughter.

"And he's already started wearing a suit! I mean, sure, it's not an environment suit, but hey!" Kasumi dodged a swat the commander aimed at her arm as he walked by on his way to the fridge. "I had a feeling you saved that outfit."

Tali was about to attach the tube of nutrient paste to her helmet when a hairy hand snatched it from her grasp. She stared at the balding cook, stunned, but the man was grinning and pointing at the oven, where he had a turian dish baking in a blue glass dish.

" I was going to ask... keelah, is that dextro food? Can you sterilize it? Um, I was going to ask where that outfit came from... wow, that smells good."

Most of them had a hard time keeping up with Tali's distracted mind and mouth, but when they'd figured it out, Kasumi pointed at Gardner who answered first. "Damn right, miss. There's no way I'm letting the commander's, uh, friend get sick from _my_ cooking or letting her eat that nutrient paste crap if she doesn't have to. Same for you, Mister Reegar!"

Tali was still staring longingly at the oven while Kal laughed. "Shepard, can we take him back to the fleet with us?"

"Not a chance," Tali replied, sniffing the air with a sigh of anticipation before she turned away. "Okay, so, the suit?" She walked over and hopped up to a seat on the edge of the table with a smile at Kasumi. She had a good feeling about the people who weren't wearing Cerberus logos, especially the petite woman in the hood. Besides, with Shepard and Garrus in the room, punches would come swiftly to anyone who offended her.

Over at the refrigerator, Shepard chuckled and pulled out two of the nutrient drinks reserved for the biotics and tore off the top of one while Kasumi began her story. He leaned against the fridge and pulled up his omni-tool to examine their schedule and other ship's business. He usually reserved paperwork for when his spirits were up, lest he put holes in the bulkhead... or for when Miranda stormed up to his cabin and demanded he start signing things. While most in the galley laughed at Kasumi's retelling of Shepard finding a credit chit in a couch and accidentally setting off an alarm, the commander was chuckling at a memory.

* * *

_"You've got to be kidding me. More? I never would have agreed to this post or gone to PCO school if I knew being in command meant __**this**__ much paperwork."_

_ Anderson laughed at his suffering XO and tossed two more datapads on his desk. "You didn't agree. I bribed Admiral Hackett with a couple of bottles of bourbon and he cut your orders. Besides, isn't this a nice change of pace from going a week without a shower, chafing in your armor-"_

_ "No." Shepard smirked and leaned back in his chair while they shared a laugh and turned to gaze out the window of their office at the Arcturus shipyards. Looking at the patchwork of hull plating that half-covered the skeletal frame of the Alliance's newest frigate, he couldn't help but feel a bit of pride... even if he was going to be spending most of his time standing watches instead of shooting things. Well... probably. He imagined the Alliance brass didn't put two N7 rated combat officers in command of a frigate just to drink coffee and do paperwork. He didn't mind the hat with 'Plankowner' stitched on it, though._

* * *

"From what I know of biotics, shouldn't you be unconscious and snoring right now?"

Garrus' dry voice broke his attention from the latest hull inspection report and he shrugged, flipping to the requisition requests. "I napped for a few minutes while Tali was patching me up. And I have this." He waggled the nutrient drink in his hand and drained it in a long pull before tossing it in the garbage. "So. What can I do for you, Garrus?" _Here it comes..._

"You can move your ass away from the refrigerator, for starters."

"All right, but that's your one favor for the day." Shutting down his omni-tool, he pushed off the fridge and returned Garrus' smirk with one of his own before he glanced over at the table where Tali and others were laughing at the retelling of the mass accelerator cannon shot he'd fired to punch a hole in one of Hock's walls. Tali shot him a glance that seemed to say 'you're hopeless', and he just shrugged.

"She seems happy. You drugged her or something, right?"

"That's my theory," Kal'Reegar said as he walked up to stand beside them. "Haven't seen her this happy in a while."

"She's just excited to be aboard another Turian-designed warship." Garrus ignored Shepard's glare and took a sip of water.

"Turian and human. And in case you've forgotten, Garrus, Anderson and I were the ones who first took the SR1 out of spacedock."

"How does that work, anyways?" Kal'Reegar inquired. "You're a soldier but you're also in command of a ship? That doesn't make much sense to me."

Shepard chuckled and opened his second drink, taking a sip before he answered. "If you score high enough, demonstrate enough potential, and can handle the workload, you can be approved for a second designator. Spectre status moved that along, but I was already qualified for command... barely. It all comes in handy when you get shot at for a living; you never know when you'll end up like Garrus here, too banged up to perform properly on the field."

"I forget, who of us here hasn't been killed before?"

Kal laughed quietly but stared at Shepard for a moment. "So you really... Tali wasn't pulling my leg? You were actually dead?" He didn't miss the faint shudder of the commander's frame while he stared down at the orange liquid inside the pouch in his hand.

"Yeah. It wasn't pleasant." Draining his drink, he tossed it in the garbage and walked over to the table without another word, coming up beside Tali while Kasumi told the story of their fight with Hock's gunship, her hands waving about animatedly.

"Touchy subject," Garrus clarified for the quarian marine, shrugging. "His ship gone, crew disbanded, his mother's children both dead. I think he feels guilty that it's only been a couple of weeks for him when it's been two years for everyone who cared about him."

"Good point. Guess it's a good thing I didn't bring up how it affected Tali." He didn't miss the way her hand brushed against Shepard's, but their little moment was interrupted by the arrival of a stomping krogan.

"The gunship again? Really, thief? That last fight on Horizon is a better story." Grunt snorted and strode over to the galley, grabbing some plastic-wrapped cured sausage from a cabinet and taking a monstrous bite without even unwrapping it. Tali peered over at Shepard with interest, but he shook his head.

"A giant floating cockroach that shoots laser beams? That wasn't much of a fight. You all just kept shooting it while I distracted it."

"How about the colossus?" Kal inquired with a grin as Tali's eyes shot over to his.

"Yes, I want to hear about that. And if someone doesn't tell me why Garrus was mad at Shepard, I'm taking Reegar and the others and heading back to the Flotilla."

"Not likely," Shepard murmured, taking a grip on one of the straps on the back of her suit, grinning at the way her shoulders tensed in the telltale sign of a blush.

Garrus and Reegar snickered as they walked over to the gathering at the table. The turian pulled out a chair and leaned back comfortably while everyone turned to listen to the story. Tali tried subtly to reach back and dislodge Shepard's grip, but he just smiled innocently and draped his arm on her shoulder instead.

"Are you two finished? Can I get on with the story now?" Tali was suddenly aware of everyone's eyes on them and she muttered something unintelligible while the commander shrugged.

"Make it quick. I'm starving."

"No shit you're starving," Jack snorted as she and Zaeed walked into the mess hall, making a beeline for the galley. "You probably burned up twelve thousand calories charging around like that."

Tali twisted to give him a curious gaze, but Garrus cleared his throat loudly. "Will you all please shut up? I have a story to tell and calibrations to finish."

" 'Finish', yeah, that's a good one," Joker commented as he limped in and found a seat.

Tali's patience finally ran out and she pointed her activated omni-tool at Garrus. "Start talking, turian, or I'll hack your visor to display hanar pornography."

The mess hall erupted in laughter again while the turian's mandibles twitched and he deactivated the eyepiece. "I'm not going to ask why you have hanar pornography." Tali's eyes narrowed behind her visor and her hand twitched threateningly. "Ah, yeah. So, we get intel from the Illusive Man that you're on Haestrom and the geth were searching for you..."

"Why the hell are you talking when we record all of our missions?" Zaeed snickered and walked over to open up his feed from the start of the shuttle drop. Few of them missed the discomfort on Shepard's face, and the grizzled merc was all too happy to exploit his embarrassment. Everyone but their commander watched, most with amusement, but Tali's jaw had dropped open when Shepard relinquished command to Garrus.

_He put Garrus in charge because he... keelah._ She wasn't sure whether to be deeply touched or profoundly disturbed that she had that effect on him. She was only further confused and stunned when the recording showed Shepard disappearing in a flash of blue light. _What the...?_ She hadn't forgotten he was a biotic, but he wasn't a very powerful one. _Right?_ But some of the crew was laughing as if it was no surprise to them. She glanced up at him, but his attention seemed focused on paperwork he had pulled up on his omni-tool.

"I still can't believe Shepard left our poor krogan behind," Kasumi laughed, giving the commander's shoulder a light shove. Tali watched his cheeks darken slightly before said krogan interrupted with a roar.

" 'Poor' !? It was was glorious! We didn't even fire our weapons half the time! Let me show you... hmm... stupid machine!" Grunt bellowed at his activated omni-tool before Kasumi sighed and leaned over, tapping a few keys. Zaeed deactivated his recording while Grunt took his place, starting up playback of his own from their entrance into the first courtyard. Tali was transfixed by the sight of Grunt and Shepard tearing through geth platforms, but she was one of the few who didn't laugh or cheer. She didn't say a word until the recording ended, when she slowly turned to gaze up at Shepard, but he was tapping quietly away at his omni-tool with a tight jaw, ignoring the others' amusement... and her.

Frustrated, she stood and punched his shoulder. "You... stupid... _bosh'tet! _You're lucky you didn't have more than two holes in you and-"

"Hey! Watch it, quarian!" Grunt bellowed, stomping toward her with narrowed eyes, to the surprise of almost everyone but Shepard, who held up a palm toward the krogan.

"She's not trying to kill me, Grunt. She's just-"

" 'Fiercely protective'?" Joker practically sang the words with a wide grin on his face, drawing a dozen laughs and glares from silver and blue eyes.

"I'm not sure if I should be glad or mortified that we decided to upgrade you to an L5n implant, Commander." Miranda's voice threatened to break as she spoke, but she couldn't restrain herself any longer and laughter suddenly spilled from her lips while Jacob grinned beside her.

Shepard slipped away from Tali and Grunt's 'fierce protection' and hopped to a seat atop the kitchen counter with a smirk, folding his arms. "Be glad. It was a damned good show. Right, Grunt?"

"Battlemaster, every krogan on Tuchanka will be put to shame!" Grunt appropriated Donnelly's beer and drained it with two fearsome gulps.

_"When he finds out he missed this one, Wrex is going to be __**so**__ pissed." _Garrus' recorded voice drew everyone's attention and they turned to the image over the turian's wrist where he was doubled over laughing. Tali finally cracked a smile despite the unanswered questions that were bouncing around in her head.

* * *

When everyone's amusement finally faded and Gardner had fresh drinks passed around, Tali found herself sitting on the counter beside Shepard, eying him curiously. "There's something I don't understand. How did you manage to do... all that? Your biotics were so... well, weak before."

"Thanks, Tali," he said, taking a sip of dark beer while giving her a smirk.

"You know what I mean."

"I can explain that." Miranda gave Tali a small smile. "Come on, I'll show you engineering and explain on the way." Silver eyes glanced over a shoulder as Tali followed Miranda out of the mess hall, accompanied by Kasumi and Kelly.

When they were out of sight, Shepard turned to the table, seeing the remaining crew grinning at him. "...What?" he inquired warily, folding his arms.

Jack was the first to speak up from her spot by the medbay door, back to the wall. "How the hell is the krogan hungrier than you?"

"His love is all he needs," Joker chimed in, earning a swat to the back of his head from a chuckling Chakwas while the rest had another laugh at their commander's expense. It faded quickly, though, when they spotted the stare he had fixed on the pilot.

"Seriously, Joker? After what we just watched, pissing him off is goddamn stupid." Zaeed chortled and downed a shot of whisky.

"He would never. No one pilots our baby like I do." Joker's declaration was proud, but he found himself standing when Shepard took a step toward him. "Oh, shit. I'm gonna, uh, go-"

"Get us to Illium? Why, yes, you are, Joker. And if I so much as feel the deckplates quiver beneath my feet, I'll order EDI to leave no more than ten seconds total of dead air in the cockpit for the duration of the trip."

"Oh, shit," Joker muttered again as he hobbled off. When he was out of sight, laughter erupted again while Shepard cracked a grin at Jack.

"Come on, psychotic biotic. You worked hard today, too. Let's whip up something to eat."

Jack seemed to press a little tighter back into the wall when a few pairs of eyes turned her way, but Shepard's seemed to be challenging her, a smirk on his lips. Scowling, she pushed off the wall and strode toward him to meet his challenge. "Fine, but only if you teach me how to do that damn charge."

* * *

Gardner had recommended a large batch of Texas chili that was an old family recipe, and Jack's mood improved when she had a large knife in her hand, even if she was chopping peppers beside her commander. Kenneth had been assigned the baking of potatoes at Gabby's insistence despite his objection that he was Scottish and not Irish. She, of course, would have none of it, forcing him to play nice with the crazy woman that squatted in their subdeck. Kal occasionally wandered by to peer into the oven with longing, and Gardner had brightened his spirits by starting up another dish of casserole to save for the unconscious quarians in the medbay. Shepard corralled Garrus and Kal into assisting, to their chagrin.

The peace was broken when Tali came storming in following her introduction to EDI. Fortunately, she and Kal were placated by a warm smile and the granting of full access to her shackling protocols, and Tali wandered back off while she gaped at the sophistication of the code she was examining on her omni-tool. Of course, her muttering about 'appropriate retribution' for concealing EDI's presence left Shepard a bit concerned, but Jack distracted him by waving the knife in front of his face.

Miranda was the next to interrupt, informing him of a call from the Illusive Man. Shepard fought the urge to scowl and instead shot his XO a smile and gestured for her to accompany him, grabbing two glasses and a bottle of Scotch from a helpful Kenneth. They pulled up chairs and took a seat when the quantum entanglement communicator came online, Shepard filling Miranda's glass while the Illusive Man raised a curious brow.

"Sharing a drink with me, Shepard? Rather friendly, even for you."

The spectre shrugged and tapped Miranda's glass after he filled his own, then held his up to his 'boss'. "Well, that's three significant favors you've done for me, even if one wasn't intentional. My life, Garrus' life, and now Tali's. We may not always agree, but you should know me well enough by now to realize that I pay my debts."

There was a brief pause while blue and mechanical eyes locked on each other's, but the Illusive Man relented and picked up his glass to raise it as well. "Eliminate the Collector threat and any debts will be settled." They all took a sip and Shepard sighed quietly at the warm, familiar burn.

"I'm afraid our tastes in liquor differ, though." He allowed a wry smile to play across his lips. "I heard you prefer bourbon, but Scotch is more to my taste."

The chuckle that came across the communicator accompanied a smile from the Cerberus leader and his top operative as the former took a drag from his cigarette and blew it out slowly. "Well, I can't fault you for that. How's your progress?"

Shepard deferred to Miranda with a gesture, taking another pleasant sip of the smoky malt and leaning back in his chair. "Good," Miranda answered, "The new cannons are completely operational – and very effective – and we're on our way to Illium for the next two dossiers. While we're there, we'll look around for some more upgrades and try to find a dock that can help us install the armor Jacob recommended."

"Good. I'm still not convinced Doctor T'Soni will rejoin you, Commander, but she and the justicar would both make powerful additions to your team... though I hear you've put even Jack to shame." There almost seemed to be a twinkle in the glow of the Illusive Man's artificial eyes and Shepard could only force a chuckle while Miranda grinned at him.

"I had a feeling Miranda would enjoy typing up that part of the report. Yeah, you two were definitely correct about that theory regarding the eezo exposure, and the new implant. Can't say I'm disappointed."

The Illusive Man leaned forward slightly in his chair, his cigarette forgotten in its ashtray. "I heard you and Grunt left piles of torn Geth heads and extremities all over the place down there."

Shepard his his sneer behind a slightly embarrassed grin and a shrug of his shoulders while he rubbed the back of his neck. Whether the Illusive Man was truly intrigued or playing the buddy act, he didn't know, but he didn't like either possibility. "Yeah, I think Grunt's a bit... impressionable. But it was a lot of fun. I'll have EDI forward you his omni-tool recording of the mission."

"I look forward to it." The Illusive Man leaned back in his chair, tapping ash from his cigarette. "I'll admit, when I first read you deferred command to Mister Vakarian, I was surprised. Miranda was rather effusive in her praise for the decision, though, both because of his capabilities and your realization of your own limitations."

Shrugging, Shepard glanced sidelong at his XO. "Well, I can't say it was one of my finer moments. I know Miranda would have done just as good a job, though. But Garrus has more experience with Geth."

Miranda shook her head and smiled. "I understand, Commander, and I agree with you. If we encounter any more geth, though, perhaps you should bring a sword." Her lips twitched and curled into an amused grin, and the three shared a chuckle.

After they all had another sip, the Illusive Man scanned his datapad for a moment. "I see there are three other quarians aboard. How are they doing?"

There was a false note of sincerity in the man's voice, one that almost resulted in a scowl. He knew the man really meant 'When are you getting rid of them?'. _Diplomatic, remember?_ So he simply nodded and tapped his fingers thoughtfully on the armrest of his chair. "Yes, one is nearly recovered from a minor wound and two are under sedation, but our doctors are confident they'll recover. Their ship is undamaged and ready to take them home when they're well enough to travel. I'll have Tali look for some possible upgrades when we're on Illium."

The subtle arch of a holographic brow made Shepard smile and lean more comfortably back in his chair, chiding Cerberus' leader gently. "Don't tell me you forgot about the 'playing nice' suggestion. Commander Shepard rescues them, gets them medical attention, upgrades their ship, and sends them back home, all from a Cerberus vessel? Good PR is good PR. Especially when it comes out of _my_ pocket."

The Illusive Man regarded him for a moment through a plume of smoke before nodding with a quiet laugh. "A fair point. I'd heard a rumor about you picking guns up off the battlefield for salvage..."

Miranda grinned at a wincing Shepard who was again rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, well... it adds up. Especially with all the combat we saw. Just don't ask how much. I'd hate to see my Cerberus funding suddenly drop off."

Miranda and her boss' laugh gave him a moment of dark amusement at their expense... well, the latter's, at least. "Don't worry about that, Shepard. I'll let you handle the quarians' upgrades, but the Normandy is our responsibility." Miranda replied first and smiled behind the rim of her glass while she took a sip before she turned back to her boss. "We have dinner for the crew cooking..."

The Illusive Man smiled and stubbed out his cigarette, waving a hand. "Of course, I'm sure they'll appreciate it. Enjoy your evening and your reunion with Doctor T'Soni, Shepard." The commander rose beside Miranda and started to turn. "And... thank you for the drink."

He had to fight that sneer again, but Shepard turned back to the Illusive Man. "I'll give bourbon a shot next time," he promised, draining the rest of his glass while the other man chuckled and ended the call. When the table returned to its usual position and they pushed in their chairs, Miranda gave him a sidelong smile.

"Nice job. I know you two still don't really trust each other outside of the mission, but he does appreciate civility."

"Civility? Me?" He laughed quietly and gestured for her to precede him out the door. "I just shoot things."

"And tear their heads off," Miranda said with an amused smirk shot at him over her shoulder as they walked through the door to the empty armory. "One downside to these automatic doors is that you can't hold them open for a lady."

His lips twitched at that remark. The Cerberus ice queen certainly seemed to have been warming up to him lately, but the extent of it was a curious – and perhaps worrisome – question. A response mentioning Tali came to mind, but they hadn't really discussed... well, anything yet. Including whether or not they'd try to keep their feelings concealed. But a subtle hint might do the trick. "Well, you can ask Tali and Liara about my 'rescued damsels' tally. Chivalry isn't completely dead."

Miranda's face darkened slightly when she stepped into the elevator before him, but she had her smile back on her lips when she turned around and the doors closed behind him. "I'll try to avoid becoming an entry on that list. I think Tali might glare at me."

Laughing, Shepard pressed the button. "It doesn't take much. She likes glaring. Especially at Garrus and me."

* * *

"Is that one of her glares?" Miranda asked quietly when they rounded the corner to the mess hall with glasses in hand and a bottle in Shepard's. Tali was standing at the counter beside Garrus, arms folded across her chest with silver eyes staring intently at the pair.

"Yeah, but it's one of the ones that says 'I'm going to zap you with my drone' instead of 'I'm going to shoot you with my shotgun'." He smiled at Tali as they approached and set the bottle down. "What did we miss while we were talking to the Illusive Man?"

Tali's eyes flicked over to Miranda who was refilling her glass with wine while moving over toward Jacob, who smiled at the woman. "Oh, not much," she answered after a moment with a deceptively sweet note in her voice.

"Liar," Garrus responded dryly. "We were telling everyone about the assault on Virmire and how you hardly left anything for us to kill."

"Oh, come on," Shepard protested. "I left you at least six."

"Five." Tali and Garrus answered in unison, sharing a glance before they laughed.

Shepard shrugged and refilled his glass. "You must have missed one."

* * *

As dinner approached readiness, Tali and Garrus shared the old SR1 tradition of a weekly movie night with the others. The recommendations all seemed to follow the same theme, to Shepard's mixed amusement and annoyance: rampages by a driven hero. Kasumi had been insistent upon a classic samurai film. Jacob's involved machine guns and headbands. Everyone groaned at Garrus' suggestion and shot down that idea quickly. A random number draw ended up deciding, and Gabby smirked victoriously at her partener when she picked a film about an ancient kilted hero who wielded a large sword, to Kenneth's chagrin. The bulk of the crew took their seats in the mess to watch the projections against the walls while Shepard, a disappointed Garrus, and Gardner put the finishing touches on the chili and dextro casserole. Half of the latter was carefully loaded into tubes via a sterilization unit under the scrutinizing gaze of Mordin, who'd come out to devour a heaping portion of dark salad. And possibly insects. The salarian wandered contentedly over to his seat after requesting a private meeting with Shepard following the movie, leaving the commander wondering why his stomach had suddenly tightened up on him.

The food was served before the evil trio of Jack, Zaeed, and Grunt could start cursing and destroying things. Tali and Reegar gave the steam-obscured tubes cautious glances, but Mordin reassured them all sterilization procedures had been followed and they took their first bites with wide eyes and happy noises that made Gardner grin and slap Garrus' hand. Gabby grew daring enough to kick Zaeed beneath the table when the merc complained about the relative mildness of the chili and Gardner tossed him a bottle of fiery sauce while the non-humans stared intently at the film and the primitive humans. Mordin was especially intrigued, Tali and Reegar were horrified by the dirty, bare skin, and Grunt was less than impressed by the battle prowess of everyone but the heroes... though he did admit to wanting the large poleaxe that the red-bearded bruiser friend of the hero carried. Shepard and Jack wolfed down their first helpings of chili at a rate that made Miranda and Jacob chuckle and Gardner grin. He was quick to give them refills, and the commander ate quietly in the back while he continued catching up on his paperwork. Tali, however, discreetly moved back beside him and snuggled contentedly against his side while Grunt and Zaeed hooted at the various decapitations and other brutal displays.

Gabby found herself elbowing Kenneth when the Scot mumbled about poorly imitated accents, but it didn't escape Shepard's amused notice that they were leaning against each other's sides practically the entire film. They'd figure it out sooner or later. Grunt had started to move his seat back toward Shepard when he noticed the commander wasn't with the rest of the group but he was waved off and Tali's confusion was likewise waved away while the krogan resumed his attack on the chili pot. That offensive grew only more intense when Zaeed shared the bottle of fiery hot sauce. Gardner had to insist upon taking care of the serving himself despite Kasumi's attempts to help, keeping the crew's drinks refilled while the desserts baked. Chakwas likewise had to kep Reegar in his seat, assuring him she'd be looking after his teammates and watching the movie on her office monitor with the sound nearly muted in deference to the sleeping quarians on their beds.

When the credits rolled, Grunt was the first to give his review. "Fine warrior... for a human. But Shepard would have torn off the restraints and left a trail of blood all the way to the dying king's bed!"

The laughter from that comment reached all the way up to the CIC while the commander dropped his face into his palm and silently wondered how he had the misfortune to become an infant krogan's personal hero. Tali and Garrus, naturally, found it hilarious.

* * *

Kal'Reegar sighed when he stepped off the elevator and into the hangar. Tali had noticed his silence while they wiped down the tables and satisfied their quarian need for cleanliness, but she hadn't pushed. He was thankful for that. He'd tried to stay positive for her, and he'd enjoyed the last few hours, but when the ache in his hip returned, so did his thoughts on the events that took place on Haestrom. He snorted quietly as he made his way toward their shuttle, imagining what Tali would say if she found him brooding when he'd been the one to tell her not to do so earlier. But she hadn't been in command of the marines. They were his squad. And most of them were dead. When the hatch to the shuttle hissed open and he caught sight of the draped bodies lined up in the main hold, he dropped to a seat and buried his visor in his hands.

"Kal?"

He jerked and lifted his head with a sniff to clear his nose, swallowing and catching sight of Shepard standing in front of him, his formal jacket gone and a familiar black strap strung diagonally across his chest. Clearing his throat, the marine straightened his back, wincing at the hoarseness of his own voice. "Yeah, Shepard? What can I do for you?"

"It should be the other way around, I think." The human commander's expression of concern shifted to one of understanding as he walked up to the hatch and gazed inside at the bodies of the quarian fallen, exhaling a slow breath. Kal turned and stared as well, blinking back the tears in his eyes. He'd lost marines on missions before, but never more than one or two. And he'd only been in command of a squad for two years, and a marine for only five. Shepard, he knew, had been at it over twice as long as that, and in far more and far bloodier battles. Part of him was grateful for it, that the human's timely arrival had prevented the total annihilation of his squad, but another part resented it. Resented that they'd had to be rescued by another squad that tore through the geth like they were nothing more than a training exercise. A squad that didn't have the quarian's extensive knowledge on fighting geth. A group of people he would have labeled undisciplined or insane if he'd met them off of a battlefield; nothing like the professionals he would have pitted against any other squad. Until today, at least. Sighing, Kal leaned against the side of the open hatch and shook his head.

"I think I recognize that expression, helmet or not." Looking up, he saw Shepard still gazing at the covered bodies. "If I had to guess, I'd say you're wondering what you could have done differently. You're beating yourself up for not being more prepared. For not being a better leader." The eyes that turned to meet his gaze through a blue visor didn't look like those of a galactic hero or some larger than life spectre. They looked tired, really. And he couldn't argue with them at that moment.

"Yeah. That's some of it." Kal turned away from his gaze and sat back down on the edge of the shuttle deck, leaning forward and setting his forearms on his knees while he stared down at the deck. "Must be the same for humans as it is for quarians. Been through it all before, though. You're going to tell me there's nothing I could have done differently. That I prepared my team as best I could. All that usual stuff. Right?"

"No." Shepard took a seat beside him and leaned against the side of the hatch, folding his arms while he gazed out at the Kodiak shuttle. "You know all of that already. So I'll ask you instead: what do you think you did wrong?"

Kal bristled instinctively and opened his mouth, but it snapped shut a second later and he sighed. "I don't know. Been thinking about it. Insertion went just like it was supposed to, but that wasn't my responsibility anyway. Deployed my team like I should have." He shrugged and sighed again, his head drooping. "Shouldn't have moved so far away from the observatory door. The geth moved right in and started hacking."

"You know better than that. You would've been flanked and cut to ribbons if you'd stayed by the door. Try again."

Well, that was a good point. And he knew that when he'd taken up a position across the courtyard and sealed the door and shutters. If it hadn't been for that initial fire from the dropship that took out half of the other squad and left them separated... but he couldn't do anything about that, either. Kal shot to his feet with a growl and slammed a fist against the hatch. "I don't know, damn it! I can't think of anything! If you're so damn wise, why don't _you _tell me what I did wrong?!"

He glared down at the human, but Shepard just shrugged his shoulders. "Because you didn't. Tali told me about the mission when we were on our way back to the Normandy. What odds did you come up with that you'd be detected on your way to Haestrom?"

The man's calm was irritating, but Kal sighed and thought back. "Twenty-five percent."

Shepard nodded. "Betting odds, but not a sure thing. You rolled the dice and came up unlucky." He stood and shook his head. "For four hours, half your squad held off an entire company of geth, using old, salvaged weapons while your shields were being beat to shit by radiation as soon as you moved out of cover. I don't know about you, Reegar, but that impresses the hell out of me. And so do you." He shrugged and gazed at the hangar door, so similar to the one he stood in front of while he watched Kaidan vaporize through a viewscreen. "You got a bad hand, but you did everything right. Me? I jeopardized the mission on Virmire by playing a numbers game with lives instead of prioritizing the mission and the bomb I should have protected. I risked my life and Grunt's life by charging off instead of staying with the rest of the squad earlier." Shepard snorted and shook his head. "Sometimes I've survived just through stupid luck, if you believe in it. No one's immune. And it's a real bitch sometimes." His face darkened at that.

Kal grunted quietly and nodded slowly, remembering what he'd read about Akuze. Bad luck, will of the ancestors, will of the spirits... whatever people called it. That was something to think about, at least. The opening of the elevator door drew their attention, though, and Tali stepped out with Garrus, Chakwas, and Joker. They stayed behind when Tali spotted them and started heading their way. "She's not gonna give me a pep talk, too, is she?"

"I don't give pep talks, Reegar. I give kicks in the ass." Shepard gave him a sidelong grin, finally drawing a quiet laugh from the marine as Tali drew close and glanced between them with concern evident behind her visor. Her fingers danced at her waist, a familiar gesture that made both men smile.

"Is everything okay? You two vanished when we were all supposed to be having a drink."

Kal traded a quick glance with Shepard and both men shrugged and spoke in unison. 'Everything's okay' and 'No problems here, ma'am' made Tali shake her head.

"You're both lying _bosh'tets_, but I forgive you. Go on, Shepard. I want to talk to Kal for a little while." She brushed her hand against his on her way to the shuttle, taking a seat and pointing at the deck beside her while Shepard smiled wryly at the quarian marine.

"You know better than to disobey her, I bet. I'll talk to you later, Reegar."

Kal took a seat as instructed and nodded up at the commander. "Thanks, Shepard."

* * *

Four pairs of eyes watched Tali set a hand lightly on Kal's slumped shoulder before the elevator doors slid shut, but it was Joker who broke the silence. "I guess that never gets any easier," he said quietly. Garrus and Shepard shook their heads after exchanging a gaze.

"Easier? No. But it helps to have people around who are there for you. Even if their amino acids are all backward." Garrus draped an arm on Joker's shoulder, earning a smirk from the pilot. "You stopped blaming yourself for the Normandy, Pressly, and the rest, right?"

Joker's wry grin faded when he looked at Shepard. "Yeah. Took a while, but Anderson helped a lot."

"He does that." Anderson's former XO smiled. "I told Tali my own story about that that time you all barged into the hangar."

"Is that where you went?" Karin laughed, looking at the violin case slung over Shepard's shoulder. "Interrupted again, I see." The commander shot her a playful glare before Joker piped up.

"Wait, are you telling me Tali knows all sorts of juicy psychological stuff about you that _I_ don't? That's not fair, Commander! I've known you longer!" Joker protested as they stepped out onto deck one.

"You don't have her soothing voice, Joker," Shepard replied smoothly as they entered his cabin.

"Or her non-abrasive personality," Karin added.

"Or her hips." Garrus couldn't resist, earning an elbow from the good doctor. "Hey!"

"Good job, Doc." Shepard chuckled and led them down to the couches, sitting by the desk and pulling out two clear glasses and one blue, passing them around appropriately while Karin winked and reached under the table for a bottle. She passed it to the commander while Garrus reached toward the one with the message on it. "Touch it and die, Vakarian."

Garrus sighed and plucked out the one he'd left half-finished instead, gazing over at the spectre who hadn't even looked up from the bottle he was uncorking. "One day you're going to tell me how you do that."

"Magic. Here you go, Karin." He gave her glass a splash of wine and she sniffed it with a smile.

"Liara's preferences seem to have grown on you, Commander."

Shepard winced at the mention of her name. It had been a week since she'd messaged him and he'd never responded. Well, tomorrow he'd make it up to her. "Yeah, well, that's what happens when you let a curious asari archaeologist play around with your brain." He pulled the violin case from his back and slid it onto the desk beside the couch.

"Just your br- hey!" Karin's elbow was quick to find Garrus' ribs again, earning her a grin from Shepard and a laugh from Joker. "Damn it, woman, I'm not a punching bag."

The doctor sipped her wine and stared hard at the turian when she lowered her glass. "You do recall sneaking out of my medbay and coming up here to poison your liver hours after major surgery, do you not?"

Garrus' mandibles twitched while Shepard and Joker exchanged grins. "Shepard was the one who ordered EDI to lock you out of his cabin and the comm, remember?"

"True. But he bought me a bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy while you were on the Citadel." Her impish smile made the turian sigh and shake his head in defeat.

"So, speaking of Liara, what happens if she joins us? Like, is there going to be a catfight, with claws and mud and ripped clothing and- ow!" Joker rubbed his ribs and glared at Karin, who was smirking at him like a mother scolding her child.

"Vrolik Syndrome won't protect you from righteous justice, Joker." Shepard took a sip of his drink and reclined against the cushions before the door chimed, cutting off Joker's reply. He rolled his eyes and smiled. "Come in, Tali. You didn't need to... Mordin?"

The salarian scientist had walked in and started descending the stairs at his usual rapid pace before he noticed the other three on the couches, a datapad in hand. "Oh. Apologies. Asked EDI where you and Tali'Zorah were, she gave different locations. Assumed you were alone. Will return later." He turned, but Shepard smiled and held up a hand, leaning forward while Garrus and Joker traded smirks at the mention of Tali.

"Wait, wait, Mordin. Have a seat. I don't know if you drink wine, but you're welcome to some. What can I do for you?"

Large salarian eyes blinked, apparently intrigued by the contents of Karin's glass, and she held it up for him to sniff when he approached. Mordin's eyes opened wider. "Thessian, excellent. Very well, will stay. Medical matters, however. Should discuss later in private." He took a seat and set the datapad down while Shepard pulled out another glass and filled it with a chuckle.

"Mordin, half the crew thinks it's hilarious to poke fun at their commander, you and Doctor Chakwas are intimately familiar with every inch of my internal organs, and these two are old friends. Just go ahead." He leaned back after sliding the glass across to Mordin who picked it up and took a sip, sighing after he swallowed.

"Ahh. Very good vintage. Reminds me of asari maiden that offered to 'embrace eternity' with me once. Intriguing offer... not sure why. What was I saying? Right, right. Medical matters. Very well, if you insist." Mordin raised his datapad and gazed at it while Garrus and Joker traded grins that said 'This should be good'.

"Wasn't teasing about everything before. Mutual affection between you and Tali'Zorah obvious, mission on Haestrom and body language reveal its depth. Likely interested in intimate contact."

Shepard's serene eyes flew wide open as Garrus and Joker stifled their snickering, being kind – or intelligent – enough to gaze over at the fish tank. _Oh, hell, why didn't I listen to him?_

Mordin seemed unaware of the others as he scrolled through his datapad at a blistering rate while Karin hid a smile behind the rim of her wine glass. "Quarian immune system weak, opposite amino acid chirality problematic. Still, have devised enhanced antibiotics and immunosupressants. Not without risk, but substantially reduced." Mordin paused just long enough to sniff proudly while Joker emitted a choking sound. The salarian continued as Shepard's voice was cut off. "Rather fine work, if I do say so myself. Still, recommend avoiding oral contact with tissue or ingestion until her immune system is fully adapted."

He slid the datapad across the table to Shepard who had his mortified face buried in a palm while Garrus and Joker pressed their hands harder to their mouths. "Recommend cabin and self-sterilization. Have included diagrams, positions comfortable for both species, erogenous zone overviews, list of lubricants safe for both species." The pilot and the turian's efforts finally failed miserably as the cabin rang with half-strangled laughter. Mordin looked up and turned toward them sternly, waving a finger at them. "Not humorous! Serious medical matters! Reaction unacceptable!" He took a sip of wine and sighed contentedly, though. "Fine vintage, however."

Shepard didn't bother looking up while Karin gave Joker's thigh a slap and flicked Garrus' mandible with a fingernail, making them both jump and glare at her while their laughter faded into snickers.

"I swear, if you two aren't out of this room in five seconds, I'm going to have EDI broadcast every damn second of your lives aboard this ship, and by every second, I mean _just that._" Shepard's voice was a growl as his hand fell away from his face and his eyes promised death. He never saw Joker and Garrus rise so fast, the turian practically scrambling over the cripple to be the first one out the door as Shepard bellowed after them. "And if either of you breathes a word of this to anyone, _same goddamned fate!"_

Tali looked confused as she dodged past a rushing Joker and Garrus. The duo broke into unrestrained laughter a moment before the cabin door slid shut. Setting her hands on her hips, Tali glanced between the trio. "Okay... what did I miss?"

Shepard's face returned to his palm while Mordin turned and his eyes brightened. "Ah, Tali'Zorah! Was offering medical advice to the commander about any prospective intimacy. Happy to relate to you as well. Garrus and Joker had inappropriate reaction, quite unprofessional."

Shepard knew Tali was staring with slowly dawning horror without even raising his head. Karin took the poor girl's hand and guided the stunned quarian to sit beside her on the couch. "Don't worry, dear. The commander already threatened them with the wrath of God, or the next best thing."

"I... um... what?" Tali seemed to be in a daze as she sat, staring at Shepard, but for once he was no help. So she turned to Mordin, finally managing to summon a reasonably coherent sentence. "You... talked to Shepard about... um... _while those two were in the room!?"_

The human male winced while the salarian appeared taken aback, taking a sip of wine before he replied calmly. "He insisted. Said he was not embarrassed to discuss medical matters in front of his physican or friends."

"I didn't know you were going to talk about _that_, Mordin!" Shepard snapped, finally removing his face from his palm and leaning back in the couch to stare up at the skylight with a sigh.

"Um... and by 'that', you mean... oh, keelah, I knew it." Tali whined, burying her visor in her hands while Karin rubbed her back warmly.

Mordin sniffed. "Should have anticipated possibility. I did warn him. But still, embarrassment unproductive. And Shepard put, er, 'fear of god' into them. Saw it myself. Won't talk. Doctor Chakwas and I are professional physicians, want only safety and happiness for patients."

"He's right, Tali. Besides, he put a lot of work into this." Karin smiled and sipped her wine, though Shepard was certain he saw a vicious little twitch of her lips when she glanced at him. Evil woman.

Tali's hands didn't move from her visor, her voice a soft, far away thing. "I... we haven't even... oh, keelah. Go ahead."

"Excellent!" Mordin began relaying the information over again while Tali glared at Shepard out of the side of her visor, but he was still staring up at the skylight in a pointless attempt to escape his doom.

* * *

**Author's note:**

_Crew of a US naval vessel that gets the ship ready for commissioning or are crew when it is are known as 'plankowners' due to an old tradition that they could petition to get a piece of the wooden deck when the ship was decommissioned. Always thought it would be a nice bit for Shepard and Anderson to have been there to put the finishing touches on the old girl and be the ones to take her out of dock for the first time.  
_

_Also, don't think I ever saw anyone really answer the question of why on earth an infantry officer would be put in command of a warship.  
_

_In case you haven't noticed, Mordin's my favorite source of comic relief. And poor Rael made a deal with the devil, who always comes to collect.  
_


	21. Escaping Doom

**Author's note:**

_Some people probably hate these. Oh well. Sorry for the delay. Life got in the way, then a case of quasi-writer's block in the form of scheduling. After my experience with the latest two chapters, I think I'll have to keep one in reserve in case of rearranging mission orders and such. With all the loyalty missions and other stuff now coming into play, I'd underestimated how complicated a simple change could make things when there's a couple of dozen things on the itinerary. That resulted in a few rewrites and a lot of time spent brainstorming, mostly involving the next chapter, but it affected this chapter, too, though it was done weeks ago.  
_

* * *

Tali sighed and ceased her pacing behind the Kodiak. She'd left Shepard's cabin almost as soon as Mordin had finished his educational monologue in order to let her cheeks bleed off their infernal heat in private. She found herself in the only area of the ship almost guaranteed to be free of other personnel. She'd been relieved to see that their shuttle's hatch was shut and Kal was nowhere to be found, but that didn't stop her from hiding out in the far corner of the hangar behind a Kodiak. Not that she was hiding. She was just... gathering her thoughts. Right. Gathering and organizing thoughts on who she'd kill first: Mordin, Joker, Garrus, or Shepard. But after only a minute or so, she'd found herself laughing quietly where she sat on the deck with her arms wrapped around her knees. It was as if the normal laws of the universe were broken any time she encountered Shepard, leaving her with utter confusion and absurdity to deal with. First he was resurrected. Then he rescued her... again. And he was working with Cerberus. Then her father warmed to him... slightly. And he rescued her again. From a new and improved Normandy. Which had an AI. And an insane salarian doctor with no concept of boundaries.

Of course, said doctor was also annoyingly perceptive. Or wonderfully perceptive. She wasn't sure which. Curiosity started to get the better of her, and she pulled up her omni-tool to review Mordin's information. Her blush returned, but she couldn't deny just how intriguing his findings were. Before, she'd expected a brief kiss to leave her coating the inside of her visor with sneezes, or perhaps leave her struggling to breathe through a swollen airway, a battle she'd possibly lose even with strong antibiotics and immunosuppressants. The worst case was obvious. But Mordin's second-worst case was equivalent to a nasty sinus infection. The worst case was the same as before, unfortunately, but he'd calculated the odds at one percent, instead of fifteen. Best case was... a mild headache and a runny nose? That caught her attention, and she quickly became engrossed in her reading.

* * *

Mordin had departed shortly after Tali, muttering something about Joker and organ failure while he tapped away on his datapad, leaving Shepard to stare at Karin's faintly smirking face while she sipped at her second glass of wine. He, too, wondered just who he should kill first: Joker, Garrus, Chakwas, or Mordin. She wasn't fazed by his glare, however, and simply kept smiling as she snuggled more comfortably back into the cushions.

"Really, Shepard. You're acting like we told you that you have a terminal illness instead of giving you a hope of kissing Tali without putting her in the medbay for a week. Or worse."

"I hate doctors."

"Yes, I know." Standing, she smiled sweetly at him and drained her glass, setting it down while she leaned down to pat his knee. "Don't just sit here on your ass, Commander. Go find the poor girl and give her a hug."

He swatted halfheartedly at her arm, but she was spry and hopped away with a laugh while she headed for the exit. When the door slid shut behind her, he finally chuckled and ran a hand back through his short black hair with a shake of his head. And he thought having one doctor aboard was bad. Standing, he picked up the empty glasses and carried them into the washroom, scrubbing them idly while he tried to review their itinerary for Illium. His mind kept wandering, though, to a blushing Tali with furiously dancing fingers, hidden somewhere on the ship... or perhaps pointing her shotgun at a turian. And he once again found himself wondering just what she looked like behind her visor. She'd described quarian features once after a long explanation of how their suits were constructed and how they kept the wearer clean, but he had a feeling words didn't do her justice.

He shook the thoughts off. Just because Mordin had come up with something to make seeing her face less dangerous didn't mean he should start obsessing over it. He'd take things at Tali's pace... if there still _was_ a pace. She hadn't been so embarrassed when an unexpected bump in the Mako had sent her flying straight onto his lap. Actually, given Liara's unamused expression, Tali had probably ended up enjoying it. Laughing quietly, he carried the glasses back to the table and gave the datapads on his desk only a cursory glance before he headed for the door. Miranda's ire, he could handle. Leaving Tali alone with her embarrassment, he could not.

* * *

Neither of them expected the embrace they suddenly found themselves in when the elevator doors opened and Tali nearly found herself bowled over by a hundred kilos of human. He caught her as she fell backward in mid-yelp, pulling her back up and into his arms loosely with an apologetic smile. He expected her to push herself out of his grasp and sic her drone on him, but to his surprise, her head drooped and she started stammering.

"Oh, I... I'm sorry. I-I wasn't paying attention, and I forgot this stupid ship doesn't have stairs, only ladders, so people are probably coming off the elevator constantly and-"

"Tali."

"-and it's probably the custom to stand back and check the elevator instead of rushing in like a-"

"Tali."

"-a krogan on his way to a buffet or whatever it is you called that meal with all the dishes on the table-"

He didn't bother saying her name again. Instead, he simply leaned down and scooped her up into his arms, enjoying the quiet squeak she let slip. He turned and carried her into the elevator while she lay dead still in his arms and he pressed the button for deck three with a carefully outstretched finger. Her silence and the tension in her muscles didn't escape his notice, and as the elevator began moving, he smiled down at the silver eyes that were blinking rapidly up at him and flicking back and forth as if they were searching for words to say. "Have I told you how cute it is when you ramble?"

She was definitely blushing, but she finally found some words while her fingers found each other atop her waist. "I... I thought Joker said men never use that word."

"There's an exception in there for quarian women. It's in the handbook." He winked and stepped off the elevator when the doors opened, nearly turning toward the sleeping pods before he stopped and walked toward the starboard observation lounge. He'd already decided that his quarters were probably a bad place for a woman who'd just had an uncomfortable talk about sex with a quirky salarian doctor, but walking through the mess hall with her in his arms might be worse.

"Oh. ...Wait, there's a handbook for this sort of..." Her eyes narrowed when her voice trailed off and she slapped his shoulder lightly. "_Bosh'tet._ There's no handbook."

"Well, not in print, at least. It's more a set of unwritten rules." When the door shut behind them, he took a seat on a couch and set her across his lap, taking one of her hands in his while the other stroked her back lightly. "I think one of them is 'keep your mouth shut when the mad scientist comes up to your quarters to talk about medical matters'." He gazed down at where his fingers entwined with hers and frowned. "I'm sorry, Tali."

If there was one thing about Shepard she'd learned aboard the first Normandy, it was that he was more complicated than initial impressions suggested. Hers had been that he was a professional and efficient soldier, a skilled killer, but it had only taken an hour to learn that he was diplomatic and considerate on top of that. After the passing of two days aboard the Normandy and two night watches of restless sleep, she'd discovered he was kind and thoughtful as well. And when she was lying in the medbay with a deeply bruised hip and a mild concussion following their flight from Therum, she'd found herself torn between discomfort and pleasure when he'd shown his affectionate side and given her arm a warm squeeze. Quarians were accustomed to close quarters and incidental contact, and friendly embraces among family, but that kind of touch was rather intimate for someone she'd met only a few days before. Of course, he hadn't known that. And now she was sitting on his _lap_, but he was apologizing to her, that handsome smile vanished from his lips.

_Damn this confusing bosh'tet of a man! I don't know whether to hug him, slap him, or kiss him._

The third option was the most appealing. But ripping off her visor and pushing him back onto the couch beneath her in an unclean room while she attacked his mouth with her lips would probably end up being one of his last memories of her. Other than watching her asphyxiate while she turned purple and swelled up like a volus from anaphylaxis.

The sigh that escaped her lips while she stared down at him ended up sounding like a growl, one that made him blink and his shoulders slump slightly. Despite her frustration at the utterly confusing events of the day and her mixed emotions, she couldn't help but smirk at the sight of the great Commander Shepard humbled by what he thought was the irritation of the slender quarian girl perched atop his legs. A snicker escaped her lips, one that grew into a deep laugh while her shoulders shook. The confused expression that contorted his brows and lips only made it worse and she soon found herself slumped against his shoulder, visor rubbing his hair beneath it while she let her amusement pour out, body shaking.

When the laughter faded into breathless chuckles, she lifted her head to see him gazing up at her with a smirk on his lips. The sight threatened to send her into a fit of giggles again, but his hands took hold of her waist and moved to lift her off of him. She obliged him just long enough to stand before she slipped back onto his lap, this time straddling his legs while she wrapped her arms around his neck. The look of surprise on his face was far more enjoyable than the shocked glance he'd given her when she teased him about Mordin's appeal, and she grinned despite the fierce heat that rose to her cheeks when his hands took a hold of her waist again.

_Option four: get comfortable._

"You know," he murmured, "sometimes even I have trouble reading you through the mask." His hands were warm even through the tough, supple material of her suit, holding her close while he leaned his forehead against her visor. "So if you're still upset with me, I could introduce you to one of the human male's best ways of apologizing to his girl: a back rub." As his hands slid around her waist to massage her lower back, her eyes drifted shut and she uttered a quiet sigh, relaxing against him.

Get _**very**__ comfortable. Keelah._

"That's... a good way to apologize," Tali whispered, her voice husky over a tongue that suddenly felt thick and clumsy. Her fingers rubbed down the back of his neck, tickling the short hairs there on their way to his shoulders while he murmured a quiet sound of agreement... or perhaps appreciation. Her suit suddenly was a damned nuisance instead of her lifesaver while she wondered just how good her back would feel if it had warm hands on its skin instead of simply suit pressure.

"Yes, we human men are devious. It also might help you sleep."

_To hell with sleep._

At the press of strong fingers into her muscles through the rubbery skin of her suit, Tali purred quietly while her fingers gripped tightly at the muscles of his shoulders. It seemed that charging a hundred meters into geth colossi wasn't the only magic he could work, she thought while her brain started shutting down almost every higher process except those that operated her nerves. Nerves that were making her shiver with sensations of warmth and pleasure while she licked dry lips and swallowed. "I..."

If there were any other words on her tongue, they were forgotten when the damned AI's voice overrode the sound of Shepard's quiet breathing. _"Begin night watch. Lieutenant Moreau has the deck."_

The lights in the observation lounge dimmed while Tali blinked her eyes open and scowled reflexively at the sound of the computerized inflections. It suddenly occurred to her that Miranda had mentioned surveillance as being part of EDI's duties and she slid quickly off Shepard's lap and out of his embrace, blushing deeply and glancing around. "Keelah, I forgot that damn AI spies on everyone."

On the couch, Shepard's expression of confusion morphed into one of irritation while he closed his eyes and sighed. "Right. I forgot about that."

_"Operative Lawson instructed me to disable active surveillance of you following the removal of the monitoring devices from your cabin, Commander, with the exception of the operational areas of the ship or in group gatherings. I am aware of you and those in your company, but nothing off-duty is recorded. I have not been 'spying', as Mister Moreau prefers to call it."_

Shepard's brow arched curiously, but Tali scowled behind her visor and glanced up toward one of the hidden speakers in the ceiling while she crossed her arms. "Right, and I'm sure the Illusive Man can't override that order on a whim."

_"He can. However, he has not. I believe he and Operative Lawson wish to remain on Commander Shepard's 'good side'."_

"Some people you might ask would say that all my sides are good ones," Shepard quipped, smiling wryly at Tali while he stood. She sighed and shook her head hopelessly despite her grin.

"Grunt doesn't count. He's like your new... puppy?" The roll of his eyes made her giggle, but her amusement faded when she thought of the time, the AI, and the surveillance devices all over the ship. _Except for his cabin, that is... _She stared at him for a moment before she sighed and shook her head. It was late, they'd be at Illium tomorrow, and rushing would be a good way to get herself terribly sick... or make her look like an asari stripper. "I... should get some sleep. Don't worry, I still fall asleep to music." She hesitated for a moment, fingers writhing at her waist, but then nodded awkwardly to him and moved toward the door.

"Tali, wait..."

But she kept walking, and the door hissed shut behind her.

* * *

Garrus sighed and looked over at the hooded face that was peering mischievously under the cannon at him.

"Damn it, will you shut the door? The shadows are making it hard to trace this lead."

Kasumi leaned back on her hands and smiled. "Nope. Not until you tell me why Joker got off the elevator trying to stifle his snickers and why you rushed in here to do calibrations."

"Got me curious, too." The thief practically leaped off the floor at the sound of Jacob's voice and she twisted around to see him leaning against the door frame with folded arms and a subtle grin on his face. "My guess? Garrus here pissed Shepard off and Joker was sworn to secrecy."

Mandibles twitched in dry amusement while three-fingered hands carefully swept the diagnostic tool along the leads that connected the loading mechanism to the computer. "You're half right. We both pissed Shepard off, and we're both sworn to secrecy. And I am _not_ going to say another word. I like my fringe right where it is."

"Yeah, I like my head right where it is, too. Might be harder than a YMIR mech's, but it's not attached to the rest of me with metal."

Kasumi giggled and lay on her back, folding her fingers atop her stomach while she gazed up at Jacob with a half-glazed look on her face. "True. I wouldn't want to see Shepard really angry. Or Zaeed. Or Jack. Or you or Grunt."

"Why are you including me with the krogan?" He sounded slightly amused and slightly insulted.

"All those muscles," Kasumi replied sweetly. She could swear Jacob's lips twitched toward a grin and his dark cheeks were trying to color, but Garrus breathed an exasperated sigh from beneath the cannon and interrupted their moment.

"What did I tell you about that doo-"

He seemed to blanch and his eyes stared off in the distance. Kasumi turned and Jacob followed suit, and they saw Tali glaring lasers at one of them for a long moment from beyond the sleeper pods before she spun on her heel and stormed back through the mess hall and out of sight.

"What was that all about?" Jacob voiced the question for the two humans, but Garrus just sighed again. Louder this time.

"Go ask Tali, if you're feeling brave. Or really, really stupid."

Neither human felt particularly brave or stupid at that moment.

* * *

_Keelah, why couldn't that bosh'tet just be asleep in a pod or down in the hangar getting beaten on by that krogan?_ Tali fumed as she stepped out onto deck four and headed for engineering. The hangar was too brightly lit, the crew deck was too crowded, and deck one... well... it was a bad idea. Probably. Maybe. Sighing for the umpteenth time, she stepped into engineering and was met with the sound of boisterous laughter from what could only be Grunt and Zaeed, down in the subdeck. That was surprising. She thought the bald biotic would shoot anyone who dared to intrude on her space. Shrugging the thought off, she moved toward the console she'd claimed as her own, but the loud – and perhaps drunk – bellowing and roaring laughter continued. Growling, she shut off her auditory pickups. Twenty seconds later, she turned them back on. Being deaf on a Cerberus ship with an AI staring at her was not a comfortable feeling. But keelah, they just wouldn't shut up down there!

She chewed on her lip and let her fingers dance for what felt like an eternity. _Damn that salarian! If he hadn't been such a busybody, I wouldn't be so... what?_ Scowling, Tali paced her way to the end of engineering to stare at the immense drive core, but for once, she wasn't paying attention to how it was a marvel of engineering. Had she really walked away from the sleeper pod because of Garrus' presence, or because she knew she wouldn't be able to sleep? Or didn't want to sleep? Was she really so intrigued with the fruits of Mordin's labors when she should be focusing on getting up to speed on the new ship instead of thinking about kissing her... boyfriend?

Yes, things were certainly absurd. Despite the embarrassing method of delivery, the salarian had given them _good_ news, but here she was, awkwardly separated from Shepard using Garrus as an excuse for staying awake. Biting her lip, Tali turned and walked away from the drive core. She'd found excuses for not saying anything to him two years ago. Taking the easy way out and saying it could wait until tomorrow wasn't a habit she wanted to return to. Besides, if he was asleep, she could borrow his couch and avoid Garrus.

But she'd make a stop, just in case.

* * *

It had taken all of his patience and a depressing amount of his technical knowledge, but Shepard had managed to install a dimmer module into the fish tank during their two-day 'vacation' after Horizon, leaving his cabin bathed in faint blue light that was considerably better than the irritating glow it had been previously. Still, perfect night lighting and some soft jazz hadn't been enough to lull him to sleep. So he'd cleaned and checked his armor, organized the bottles of alcohol under the table, and put away some of the datapads laying around that threatened to turn into a swarm. He even wiped down every surface he could find with disinfectant and changed the sheets on the bed before he realized what he was doing and scoffed at himself. While he'd expected getting involved in a relationship with a quarian would be considerably more complicated than dating a human or an asari, he'd expected to be soothed by Tali's presence aboard the Normandy. Not lying awake torn between being happy to be around her and feeling the urge to put Mordin's information to use in order to kiss her or feel her skin under his hands.

Surely, there was some sort of long psychological explanation for why Tali had managed to sneak her way into his heart and leave him painfully aware of all the empty space in his bed. He'd curbed most of his aggression and impetuousness years ago thanks to the influence of smarter officers than he, and Tali had turned out to be another calming influence, but now it seemed she was the opposite. And she seemed as conflicted as he was. Shepard shook his head and snorted with wry amusement at himself. While he had a well-earned reputation for being quite an efficiently brutal warrior, he took a more level-headed, diplomatic stance outside of combat, a fact Ash had note with both disappointment and respect when they'd had a little chat about their mutual flirting and the clear violation of Alliance regulations it could have led to. No doubt she'd be laughing at his current dilemma. She'd also probably make a joke that not only was she now an officer, but he was technically no longer Alliance. The thought made him chuckle. Ash's irreverent sense of humor reminded him of his mother's. And Captain Shepard would no doubt have a few mocking words for him if they were to discuss his troubles in three days on the Citadel.

The thought of his mother reminded him that he did have one outlet available he'd forgotten about, and he tucked in the last corner of the bedsheets before he walked to his desk and unfastened the latches on his violin case. A little playing usually did the trick. Garrus had his calibrations. Liara had meditation. He had strings and a bow. As he took a seat on the chair and started tuning the strings, he wondered with some amusement if one could be rusty after two years if it was only two weeks to the brain.

An hour later, he'd been back in bed for thirty minutes, trying to let his mind focus only on the sound of a Spanish guitar when he heard an accented and alarmed voice over the music.

* * *

"Keelah!"

Tali nearly leaped out of her suit when she came face to face with some moving creature with large teeth, but it only took a moment for her to realize that it was in some sort of transparent enclosure and its small nose was twitching in a rather adorable fashion instead of a threatening one. That didn't immediately stop her heart from pounding, though, while she swallowed and took a step back from the desk and the picture of Shepard's family that had piqued her interest. Her heart changed gears and seemed to stop when she heard him speak.

"Tali? Is that you?"

Her fingers met at her waist while she turned her head to gaze through the glass display case at Shepard. He was sitting up in his bed, dangerously shirtless with a hand slipped between the bed and the nightstand. Probably a hidden gun. She swallowed and walked slowly toward the stairs, stopping at them while her fingers danced at her waist. She'd hoped to simply slip in quietly and lie down on the couch without disturbing him since he looked asleep, but sneaking a peek at the photo had been too tempting to pass up. And now her cheeks felt as if they were on fire.

"Um... yes, sorry. I just wanted to borrow the couch because that _bosh'tet_ of a turian was by the sleeper pods and engineering was too loud and the hangar is too bright and that damn AI watches everything and I just... sorry." _You're rambling again. But it's cute, right? Right._ She saw him smile and shake his head, extricating his hand from between bed and nightstand before he narrowed his eyes slightly and peered intently at her.

"I thought I locked the door."

_Oh. Right. Keelah, you broke into the captain's quarters. Father would kill you. Um..._ "...You did. But, well..."

"Quarian. I got it. And the couch is all yours." He cracked a smile and tossed the covers from his lap, making Tali's heart stop for a moment before she noticed the loose pants he had on. Standing, he picked up an empty glass from the nightstand and walked toward her. "Did you stub your toe or something?"

It took her a moment to realize he'd asked her a question and she tore her gaze from his bare chest with a blink. "..What? Oh... no. I forgot about that little furry creature you bought and it startled me. Its teeth look... sharp." _Damn it, why couldn't he have been dressed doing paperwork instead of in bed? _She hesitantly stepped aside to let him pass while he gave her a smile in passing and stepped into the washroom after the door hissed open. The sudden light made her squint, but it gave her a more colorful view of his bare skin than the dim illumination of the aquarium while he refilled his glass with water.

"Oh. Good point. I don't think they could punch through your suit, but a hamster probably isn't the best choice of pet when you have a quarian girlfriend."

_Girlfriend?_ She was still thinking that over in her mind with a smile on her lips when the light vanished and he stood in front of her again, sipping his water. "Well... I don't know. It's kind of cute." She gazed down at the discoloration on one side of his torso and the bandage on the other. They provided a convenient distraction. "How's your wound? Do you want me to change your bandage again?" She moved to brush past him on her way to the first aid kit beneath the desk, but his arm ensnared her waist and he set the glass on the desk before he pulled her into his embrace. She imagined the straps of her suit were chilly on his skin, but he certainly felt warm when she wrapped her arms around him and snuggled close. _Oh, keelah._

"Nope. You did a great job the first time. Now stop fidgeting and relax, Nurse Tali." She could hear the smile in his voice while he pressed a kiss to her hood. His hands resumed their ministrations on her lower back as if they'd never stopped, and she stifled a moan, feeling her knees weakening while she practically melted against him. Hitting the rack after Ilos and the Citadel hadn't felt quite _this _good. _Hmm..._

"Would it be easier if I was lying down?" She wasn't sure where she worked up the nerve to ask _that_ question, or why she didn't stutter in the whispered asking of it, but at the moment she didn't really care. She'd never be able to sleep if his backrub didn't leave her blissfully fading into unconsciousness like he'd inferred earlier. And with a certain suit program that could relax her being virtually out of the question with a nosy AI spying on her everywhere else but Shepard's cabin, going to Chakwas for sleeping medication would be her only other option. It was the wisest alternative, but not the most attractive. She had little desire to face either of the Normandy's doctors again that night.

"Hm. Another good point." He slipped out of her grasp and took her hand, leading her down the stairs. Instead of turning toward the couch like she expected, he headed for the bed, making her stop in her tracks as he came to a stop after his hand almost pulled out of hers. She wasn't sure, but she thought her heart had stopped for a moment. Whether it was terror or excitement, though, she wasn't sure.

"Um..."

He turned and gazed at her curiously for a moment before sighing quietly, taking both of her hands in his and looking down at them. "Sorry. It'd be more comfortable, but my good intentions seem to keep getting me into trouble."

She stared down at their entwined fingers, wholeheartedly agreeing but smiling faintly despite that. "Yes, you're a magnet for trouble. And it's your own fault. You're the dumb _bosh'tet_ who picked a girl in a suit, you know." _Ancestors know why, but I'm not complaining... even if this is maddeningly complicated._

He laughed softly and squeezed her hands in his. "Don't you blame _me_ for that. You're the one with the sweet voice and the killer curves who kept cuddling up against me. You have indoctrination circuitry in that suit, don't you?"

Tali giggled. A few replies came to mind, all of them involving his curiosity about the contents of her suit and his fondness for its fit. They might have made him smirk and color slightly, but as she stared down at their joined hands, she bit her lip. At this rate, she'd end up bouncing between anxiety and excitement forever. _Well, there's one solution to that... _Slipping her fingers from his with a deep breath, she reached up and unlatched the seals on her mask with a quiet hiss of changing pressure, ignoring the way he blinked and stiffened. They both held their breath while she rotated the mask and pulled it off, but when she held it down at her side she was the first to breathe, inhaling the cool air of the cabin and her boyfriend's unfiltered scent.

* * *

Shock, guilt, and confusion suddenly competed for dominance in his mind. Shock that she had just unsealed her suit in an environment that wasn't sterile even with its thorough air filtration, guilt that he hadn't stopped her from unsealing her mask, and confusion that the glow of her eyes had virtually disappeared. But it was too dim to see her face, shadowed as it was by her hood. He nearly grabbed her mask to put it back on in order to quell his alarm when something told him to have a little faith in her judgment like she always had in his. After one deep breath, she'd gone silent and her fingers ceased their twitching, the telltale sign that she had gone from anxiety to terror or dread. That was when he remembered a little bit of quarian trivia Tali had taught him two years ago, and he smiled wryly. He took her free hand in his and squeezed it while he took two steps and spoke softly. "Human, remember? Weak night vision."

* * *

"Oh!"

She practically squeaked the word and took a breath while she turned, but when her face was turned toward the soft blue glow of the aquarium she held her breath again while he gazed at her. Her eyes tried to squeeze shut, but she willed them to stay open and locked on his own while he took in the sight of her face. After a moment that felt like an eternity, his lips spread into a warm smile and she felt his hand squeezing hers. "Wow."

_'Wow'? That's good... right? I mean, he's smiling, and... keelah, he looks handsome._

Tali didn't notice when her mask dropped onto the deck with a clatter; she was too busy throwing her arms around her boyfriend's neck and kissing him while she uttered a delighted sigh at the taste of his mouth and the soft warmth of his lips upon hers.

* * *

'Beautiful' seemed too common a word to describe her when he gazed upon her face for the first time. Her pale skin almost seemed to glow in the soft blue light of the aquarium, and her eyes certainly did, reflecting the light like a cat's while she stared at him, her anxiety apparent and endearing. Tali's features were almost human, with her nose much as he'd expected it from the shape he could see through the mask, and her lips were soft and full. But the black lines that ran from the inside of her brows diagonally up along her forehead and the shine of her eyes gave her a wonderfully exotic allure. Joker had once said he imagined quarians looked rather plain and dull as if they reflected their utilitarian suits, but Tali was an ethereal beauty. A shy beauty that was waiting nervously for him to say something, but he could only smile and murmur one word while he gazed at her, transfixed.

When his girlfriend practically pounced him into stumbling back against the bulkhead while her lips pressed to his, he idly decided he'd said just the right thing and wrapped his arms tightly around her waist, kissing her with equal passion.

Tali blinked repeatedly a minute later when her eyes reopened, feeling dizzy and breathless, but when the air poured into her lungs she knew she wasn't asphyxiating. Her lips were tingling, however. She licked them, swallowed, and gazed at Shepard with a dazed smile. "...Keelah."

He laughed quietly and slid his hands to her waist while hers took a grip on his shoulders. "Keelah indeed. But you are going to ease my worries and tell me you-"

"Yes, I stopped by Mordin's lab, damn it." The subtle coloration of Tali's cheeks was hard to see in the dim light, but its presence was obvious while Shepard eyed her intently and raised his brows.

"Very presumptuous of you, Miss Zorah. I didn't know I had a reputation for being easy."

"What?! I didn't... I mean, just as a precaution! Not because I came up here to..." Her eyes narrowed dangerously at the teasing glimmer in his eyes and the curl of his lips and she moved her hands to his chest to push off him, the word '_bosh'tet_' on her lips. Instead, she found herself tugged back in by strong hands on her waist while his mouth closed on hers again. Tali sighed out a quiet sound of pleasure while their lips met and she gripped the back of his neck. It hadn't taken her long to follow Shepard's lead and inexperienced presses of her mouth turned into a supple melding of warm lips that made her shiver and clutch at his bare skin. Skin that probably felt a lot warmer without the barrier of gloves. Behind his neck she struggled to undo a seal below her elbow, but she found it suddenly impossible when he distracted her with the soft stroke of his tongue on her lips. Her quarian aversion to microbes was already forgotten when she met the caress of his tongue with her own, moaning and clinging to his shoulders while her knees threatened to buckle.

As if he'd read her mind, Shepard slowly withdrew his mouth from hers and gave her a mischievous smile while he wrapped his arms around her waist tightly and lifted her off her feet, carrying her toward the couch. She uttered a soft yelp and laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. "Do you have some sort of obsession with carrying me?" He stopped in front of the couch and sighed theatrically, attempting to dislodge her from her vice-like grip on him, to no avail. She just grinned at him, unmoved by his efforts, while he gave up his efforts and raised his eyes to hers and smirked.

"I had no idea girls in suits were such pains in the-"

She dropped off him and shoved him to a seat on the couch before he could finish, pouncing atop him and giving him a fierce kiss that made him forget all about what he was going to say. Girls in suits, apparently, were trouble. And aggressive. Tali pushed him onto his back while her lips attacked his and her tongue slipped into his mouth as she uttered a low moan and squeezed the muscles of his shoulders with her gloved fingers. From the hunger in her kiss and the tightness in her grip, it seemed she'd forgotten all about her earlier anxiety. And with the sensual flare of her hips gliding beneath his palms and her tongue stroking against his, he found it hard to remember his intentions to take things slow.

He was surprised and disappointed when she sat up suddenly, but she was a beautiful sight in the pale blue light with her shining eyes half-lidded and her lips parted while she caught her breath with soft pants. They gazed silently at each other for a moment and he wondered if she was as conflicted as he found himself in that instant. He was torn between not wanting to rush and being painfully aware of her weight on his hips and the enticing curves of her slim waist under his palms. But Tali seemed to come to a decision, reaching up to unclasp her hood and push it back before she reached behind her neck and unfastened the golden gorget. She tossed it over by his boots with a rather sexy smile that accompanied a bite of her lower lip before her fingers slipped behind her neck again, no doubt working on the rest of her helmet. He couldn't deny how exciting it was to see her undressing atop him, but...

"I should probably just shut up, but I have to ask-"

"You're right. You should just shut up," Tali murmured, fixing him with a heart-stopping smile that was somehow shy, nervous, excited, and seductive all in a single curl of her lips. Her chest was rising and falling at a quickened pace while she unfastened her helmet and pulled it off. She didn't toss it, but leaned down over him and slid it across the deck to roll to a stop beside his boots. His eyes widened, but it wasn't her proximity that caused it. It was the wavy dark hair that had spilled free and was tickling his torso, neck, and face while he found himself smiling and lifting a hand to run his fingers through it. The gesture made her giggle while she began working on a seal below her right elbow. "Don't tell me you're surprised. I told you we have hair."

He laughed and shook his head, moving his hands to her left arm to work on that seal, putting the knowledge she'd given him about their suits two years ago to good use. "I know, I just... all right, two things. One, my short hair gets dirty after just half an hour in a helmet. Two, it's... black?" It was hard to tell her colors in the faint blue light. "I was thinking silver for some reason."

Tali tugged off her right glove and tossed it with a roll of her eyes, sitting comfortably astride him while she watched him puzzle out the seal beneath her left elbow. "Three hundred years? I think we've had enough time to figure out how to make our suits clean and efficient, Shepard. And... why silver?"

He found himself twitching slightly when a soft fingertip lightly grazed down the center of his chest and Tali's eyes widened at her first touch of another's skin under her hand, but the distractions of her fingers and her glove weren't quite enough to make him forget his last dream before waking on Lazarus Station. "Well, I had a dream... just before I woke up for the first time. The old squad was there, and you had silver hair." He grinned at the faint sight of color rising to Tali's cheeks, but she smiled slyly and watched her left glove finally come undone and peel off her forearm and hand.

"You... dreamed about me out of my suit? If my father knew..."

"Let's not go there," he objected dryly. It was his turn to smirk up at her as he sat up and cupped her neck in his hands, making her moan softly at the warmth on her skin before she met his kiss ardently and found his shoulders again with bare hands. It was a curious sensation to have only three fingers on his skin, but the firm grip she took on his muscled flesh and the wrap of her legs around his waist were exciting distractions. Almost as diverting as the sweet taste of her mouth and the arousing caresses of her tongue.

Following a minor suit puncture on Therum, Shepard and Chakwas had agreed Tali needed a clean room, or a space that could quickly be converted when needed. She'd objected, but two weeks later, after a rachni had managed to put a gouge in her suit nearly deep enough to puncture, she'd been purring with delight in the sterilized female washroom following her suit repair while the shower poured warm water over her bare skin. She'd been unable to properly describe just how amazing that had felt when she told Shala about it a year later. She wasn't likely to describe the current sensations she was experiencing to her aunt, but she knew it'd be quite impossible. The smooth warmth of Shepard's skin under her sensitive, wandering fingers and the taste of his lips and tongue on hers were a delicious combination of blissful and maddening, and before she was even aware of her actions, she was reaching back behind her neck to slip the tab of her suit seal from its stow. Her distraction made it difficult, however.

Her fumbling seemed to catch her boyfriend's attention and she was prepared to growl or whine when his lips slipped away before she felt his fingers replacing hers. She bit her lip as some of her anxiety returned, but her eyes slid shut when the warmth of his mouth found her neck and kissed her sensitive skin. While she whimpered softly and wrapped her fingers around the back of his neck, she felt him pull the tab free and slowly pull it down. When the cool air of the cabin found the exposed skin along her spine, Tali shivered, and then gasped when his lips moved to her throat and his warm palms slipped under her opened suit to caress her back and warm her skin. "Keelah!"

Her breathless exclamation made him smile. Exploring the smoothness of her skin and the taste of her mouth was exciting and delightful, but making her shiver at the simple exchange of warmth, something most species took for granted, was immensely rewarding. He pressed a soft kiss to her lips for a brief moment and wrapped his arms around her lower back, lifting her with him as he rose to his feet and started walking toward the bed. He watched her eyes open, saw her swallow and wet her lips with her tongue before leaning in for another kiss, but he held her at bay with a chiding cluck of his tongue. "Ah ah. This is where you relax and get that back rub I promised you." He knelt down a bit to slip her onto the bed, but her grip on his neck and waist didn't abate while she smirked at him.

"'Relax'? I can't relax, you _bosh'tet."_

He could swear her eyes glimmered just a little brighter, right before she set her feet on the deck and yanked him with her onto the bed, where she promptly pushed off with a strong leg and rolled atop him again to deliver a fervent kiss.

* * *

Miranda rubbed her temples and sighed, dropping the datapad onto the desk. Shepard had promised to have the latest requisition requests and ship log entries approved by midnight, and here she was at 0100 still empty-handed. She knew he hated paperwork, but he wasn't one to procrastinate. Unless their newest crew member was distracting him. That thought didn't help her headache. She'd spent the last few hours absorbed in her terminal and despite the technological advances that made eyestrain a thing of the past, she'd been squinting too hard over the last half hour. After spending three mindless hours watching an old film and drinking more wine than she should have, she'd firmly berated herself and tore into her work – any work – with a vengeance as penance. Miranda had hoped Shepard and Jack would have forgotten about their little deal, but he'd reminded her after the movie and left her with a lot of redacting to do before moving on to more interesting work.

What she'd found while perusing new intelligence information had been surprising, to say the least. It was like finding a ghost, one that had been put to rest nine years previous. But it wasn't her ghost. She'd been pacing back and forth by the window, the kind of uncertain habit she abhorred but sometimes found herself lapsing into while she thought over her options. They'd be at Illium in the morning, which was important to the mission. But she couldn't figure out why she was so torn over what to do about what she'd found. A few weeks ago, it would have been obvious. But withholding it felt... wrong, even if she knew what the Illusive Man would do... and how Shepard would do the opposite. Frowning, she turned and strode out the door and headed toward the elevator. She could kill two birds with one stone and take out her ire on the commander while she dumped the decision on his lap.

Across the mess hall, she saw Garrus heading in the same direction and as expected, they came face to face outside the elevator. He gave her a curt nod, but they said nothing as they both stepped into the elevator, staring at each other for an awkward moment when the doors slid shut. Garrus cleared his throat. "It's the human custom to let ladies go first, right? I can never remember." Miranda wanted to sigh. She was loath to clue anyone into her personal business, but neither was she the type to meekly hide her intentions, and she reached out to press the button for deck one, but Garrus cleared his throat again and this time she did sigh, turning to raise a brow at him.

"Something wrong?"

Dark turian eyes regarded her a moment and a mandible twitched before he shook his head and pressed the button for deck two. "No, nothing. Just... trying to get the smell of Kasumi's perfume out of my nose. Human women may love the smell of flowers, but we turians prefer-"

"I don't want to know."

Garrus shrugged and stepped off the elevator when the doors opened, turning left and hurrying through the CIC as if he was avoiding one of Kelly's smiles, though she wasn't present. When the doors slid shut again, Miranda pressed the button for deck one.

Thirty seconds later, she was back in the elevator, rubbing her throbbing temples while she anonymously forwarded the information. Whatever the muffled sound coming through the locked cabin door had been, it hadn't helped her headache. But at least she'd found an easier solution than dealing with the commander.

* * *

"Keelah," Tali breathed again time while she lay curled up against Shepard's side, still quivering. It seemed the magic he could work wasn't limited to biotically charging or backrubs and she smiled dazedly at the thought.

"I think you mentioned that, but I agree."

Tali giggled euphorically and nuzzled her cheek against a broad shoulder which was serving as her pillow. "It's not easy thinking of something original to say when your brain isn't working properly." Her voice sounded strange to her ears out of the confines of her helmet, but maybe that was because speaking coherently was also difficult and she was mumbling against his skin. Nerve-Stim Pro hadn't had an effect quite like _that_ on her. The thought made her giggle again.

"I'll take that as a compliment." He pulled her hand from his chest and out from under the covers to kiss her palm. Even that light contact made her shiver, but she smiled with closed eyes. "Think you'll be able to sleep now?"

"Mm hmm," she murmured, thankful he'd taken the time to reassemble most of her suit and lay it out for her after their first round (and given her a fine view in the process), because she was too tired and her muscles too weak to take care of it. And in the morning, she'd probably wake with a headache and congested sinuses. Besides, she was far too comfortable to move, other than to wrap her arm around him again and snuggle more comfortably against his side. "Even if I didn't get that back rub you promised me. Not that I'm complaining." As if there was anything to complain about while lying naked in her boyfriend's warm arms between soft sheets, comfortable and sleepy, with all of the confusion of the past few hours long gone. Delightful sex and a couple of orgasms hadn't hurt, either.

Shepard laughed quietly and lifted his head to kiss the top of her head. "I knew you'd be trouble. Only half a day ago, I was a juggernaut of destruction. Now, I've been pounced and seduced by a quarian girl I outweigh by almost forty kilos. What would the crew say?"

"That you're one lucky _bosh'tet," _Tali replied without missing a beat, her voice sleepy and amused. A long finger poked his side and made him squirm, though. "But if you or that nosy AI tells them, I'm going to... I don't know, but it will not be pretty."

"Understood. But you and 'not pretty' don't belong in the same sentence, Tali."

She smiled and pressed a weary kiss to his shoulder before snuggling back in, sighing happily at the compliment and the warm, intimate embrace she found herself in between soft sheets. As she drifted off to sleep, she was still smiling.

Shepard watched her in the dim blue light as her lips relaxed and her breathing slowed, smiling contentedly while he held her in his arms. It was hard to believe, really. Dead two years, all the time in the galaxy for something horrific to have happened or for his friends to have met untimely ends, but here he was with one of them in his arms and three others down below while they were on their way to see another. Eventually, perhaps they'd find their way to Tuchanka, and maybe Ash would end up aboard. And in a few days, he'd meet his mother on the Citadel and if he was fortunate, he'd find a way to 'reconcile' with Anderson. At that moment, with Tali sleeping peacefully snuggled against him, thing seemed right enough in the galaxy, Collectors and Reapers be damned. Leaning down carefully, he kissed his girlfriend's hair once more before he laid back and closed his eyes.


	22. Tension

**Author's note:**

_10k words in a chapter. Not sure where that came from. Probably the fact that it took me a couple of weeks to write due to the stuff I mentioned earlier. More character interaction, but I'm not sure how well I wrote it. I can write entirely dark pieces. I can write entirely light pieces. But mixing both has always been something I feel I need to work on. Not to mention writing intimacy, even sans lemon. Feedback is appreciated. Like the beard, growth is necessary for raw power._

_Looking forward to posting violence again!_

* * *

Shepard awoke to the sound of a sneeze and a quiet groan, blinking his eyes open. Shrouded behind disheveled, wavy black hair, he saw Tali's face buried in the crook of her elbow atop his chest while she shivered and pressed tightly against him, the covers gripped in her free hand and held to her neck. _Ah, damn... I should have turned the temperature up last night._ He wrapped his arms around her and rubbed at her back to warm her, seeing her eyes flicking up toward him while she sniffled with what sounded like a stuffy nose. "Hey... you okay?" Despite her shivering and the fact she was likely sick, as predicted, he couldn't help but smile. Waking up without unpleasant dreams was always positive. So was awakening with little more than a dull ache in his ribs. But opening his eyes to see Tali snuggled against him was a wonderful feeling, and not just physically.

She shook her head but laughed weakly. "Sick, but it's not that bad. Just some congestion and a sore throat and a headache."

"Meaning you feel terrible, but you'll be damned if you'll let me know that." He gave her a gentle smile and stretched out toward the nightstand, pulling open a drawer and finding only a spare pillowcase. It wasn't a handkerchief, but it was clean and soft. He made a mental note to make some purchases on Illium and look into ways to keep his cabin as sterile as possible without dousing it all in antiseptic constantly. He held it out for her, and Tali stared at it with some confusion. _Oh, right. Suit-dweller._ "For your nose," he explained apologetically. Tali looked mortified, but she took it gingerly and lifted her head to dab at her wet nose while he pulled the covers up tighter and resumed stroking her back. "It's really not fair that I feel fine, but I can get a hot shower started for you to warm up in. It'll help your nose, too."

"But that's..." She started to object to such an extravagance, but he gave her that narrow-eyed frown that tended to quell crew disagreement and she muttered something in Khelish that didn't translate. Sliding off him to curl up beneath the covers, she mumbled through them at him. "Fine, but hurry up! It's freezing in here!"

He really shouldn't have, but he grinned to hear Tali order him about and complain all in a span of seconds. Apparently, she took to being a girlfriend rather quickly. Not to mention she was rather, well, cute, as a muffled lump under the sheets. He slid out of bed and grabbed his discarded pants before heading toward the washroom, stopping only to raise the temperature in the cabin by seven degrees.

* * *

While there were two other qualified helmsmen on board and Shepard was surprisingly proficient, Joker practically lived in the cockpit despite the irregularities it meant for his sleeping schedule. And though he'd never admit it, it _was_ nice having EDI there to keep an eye on things during FTL travel, since she could have him awake and back at the controls inside of two seconds with a jolt to his adjustable seat. Still, he sometimes wished there was another _real_ pilot aboard so he didn't find himself yawning all the damned time. Like he was that morning as he limped into the mess hall with an emptied bladder with eyes fixed hard on the kitchen counter where Gardner had platters of pancakes, waffles, bacon, sausage, and eggs ready. _To hell with vegetarians. Well, except Tali. _The thought made him snicker just before he caught sight of Garrus, and he immediately looked around for Shepard or Tali. Fortunately, neither was in view, and he breathed a sigh of relief.

"Don't let Shepard hear you thinking whatever it is you were thinking," Garrus remarked dryly as he came up beside the twitchy pilot, sighing with irritation at the all-levo spread.

"What? I wasn't... okay, yeah, good point."

Gardner turned away from the stove with a blue pan in mitten-clad hands and gave them both a glare. "The Commander must have spent thousands on these provisions. I won't hear any trash-talking of him in _my_ mess hall, you hear me?"

Rupert was no Blue Suns gunship, but at the moment, Garrus thought it best to keep his mouth shut and he cleared off a space on the counter for the blue pan that drew his interest. "Wouldn't dream of it. Just tell me you washed your hands after you cleaned the head this morning."

"Don't start with me, son." Rupert set the pan down and smirked at the turian before he returned to his stovetop. Joker chuckled and reached for the platter of pancakes but suddenly found himself nudged aside by well over three hundred kilos of krogan.

"Grunt! Wait your turn, young man!"

The krogan turned to see Doctor Chakwas glaring at him over her mug of coffee, and he scowled, taking a step back. Something about the woman triggered the instinct to obey, though he wasn't sure why. He'd noticed the same even from Shepard and Massani. Perhaps it was because she was a fertile female. Or a doctor. Except that didn't factor into things for other species, did it? Bah. Regardless, he'd follow Shepard's lead. But the other doctor, the salarian, was a different matter. He'd caught the skinny little alien staring oddly at him, but his expression had been hard to read. His imprinted knowledge on aliens had been little more on how to fight and to kill them, but if he had to guess, he'd say it was... indecision? Concern? Maybe guilt? The latter two would be appropriate. If they weren't part of Shepard's crew, he would have beaten the turian and the salarian to a pile of broken bones for their race's roles in developing and deploying the genophage.

"Hey, Grunt. Uh, here you go, big guy."

Distracted from his wandering thoughts, Grunt turned to see Joker holding a plate out toward him, piled high with at least a kilo of steaming food. That was unexpected. He narrowed his eyes suspiciously at the pilot but took the plate cautiously and Joker turned away to load up his own. He turned toward the table, but he saw Chakwas glaring at him pointedly. Oh. He glanced back over his shoulder reluctantly. "Thanks." The social nicety was almost worth the expression of shock on the weak human's face, and Grunt chuckled while he popped a waffle into his mouth and started chewing. Human manners were stupid, but sometimes stupid was amusing.

* * *

Tali had consented to spend an entire quarter of an hour in the steam-filled washroom while hot water warmed her and the humid air eased some of her congestion. The privilege of showers on the flotilla was timed down to the second and water consumption measured to the quarter of a liter. That was easy to forget, however, when her boyfriend washed her back and hair for her after warming her under the water in his arms with a delightful embrace and then wrapped her in a large, fluffy towel before he left to retrieve her suit. Despite her headache and the pressure in her sinuses, she couldn't help but smile while she drew a picture of the Normandy in the water condensation on the mirror with a fingertip, enjoying the chill of the water and glass. All the new sensations of the last twelve hours, intimate and otherwise, were completely worth the equivalent of a human head cold. She awoke feeling a little better than she'd expected to, actually, and Shepard had been right about the shower. But her smile wasn't completely inspired by her immune system or hot water, and it grew wider when the door opened and her suit was draped over the sink so her boyfriend could wrap his arms around her and pull her in for a warm hug.

"You sure you don't want to spend the rest of the day in bed? I don't think chicken soup would work for a dextro, but I'm sure Gardner could whip up something close to it."

Tali remembered the human food a few sick crewmen had found prepared by Doctor Chakwas and grinned. She lay her head on his bare shoulder, still amazed at the sensations of warm skin on hers while she nuzzled him with her cheek and felt his hands rubbing her shoulder blades. "On my first full day aboard a Cerberus ship? That would make me look lazy, Shepard. Or... um..."

" 'Um' ?" He gave her a teasing smirk and ran a fingertip along the side of her neck, making her shiver while she glared at him. The faint blue light of the fish tank had given her skin an almost ethereal glow and emphasized the reflective properties of her eyes, but in the soft white light of the washroom she was a pale lavender and her irises were an almost imperceptible shade of milky violet. A beautiful combination, he thought, even if she was fixing him with a dangerous stare. He softened that look with a gentle massage of her shoulders, making her eyes slide shut while she moaned quietly and lay her head back down on his shoulder.

"Like... I'm the captain's... plaything, you _bosh'tet."_

Shepard laughed softly and wrapped her tightly in his arms, laying his cheek against hers. She squirmed a little, like she had the first time she'd felt the curious tickle of his stubble, but didn't protest. It was a strange but intriguing sensation, even if it had made her shriek with sudden laughter when he'd kissed her ticklish stomach the night before. "I see your point, but you don't have to worry about that, even if the crew figured out what happens behind closed doors. Even a Cerberus crew has heard all about you and the rest of our old squad. And..." He leaned back and cupped her cheeks in his hands, lifting her head while he gave her a playful wink. "They all know better than to mess with the commander's girl."

Tali smiled viciously. "True. Besides, I have a shotgun."

"Exactly." He leaned in for a kiss, but her face suddenly contorted and she snatched his towel away, sneezing into it. He changed his target from her lips to her forehead while she uttered a muffled '_bosh'tet_' into the cotton, deciding to consult Rupert about some dextro soup.

* * *

The crew was certainly an interesting cast of characters, and if they added the next two persons of interest to the crew, it would only get that much more exciting. Kelly smiled to herself while she sorted through the mail on Shepard's public email account. They'd managed to have two years of emails forwarded from his old Alliance account. A few clever fans had discovered and publicized the address, and when they'd migrated it there had been over sixty-five thousand unread messages... once spam and other chaff had been sorted out. The bulk of it had been sent in just the two weeks after the battle of the Citadel. Setting up filters to sort the mail into shock at his demise, conspiracy theories speculating he was alive on secret assignment, thanks, business opportunities, marriage proposals, sexual propositions, death threats (the galaxy could never have enough psychiatrists, apparently), and whatever else was her latest side project. Aside from speculating on the commander's relationship with their latest crew member.

The sound of the elevator doors opening made her turn and she smiled when she saw Tali hurry out. "Good morning, Tali," she said cheerfully.

"Oh, um... good morning, Kelly." Tali's purposeful stride broke into hesitant steps while her fingers began to dance at her waist.

"Mordin's in his lab. Be careful, though. He's had an entire pot of coffee." Kelly didn't miss the odd tone of Tali's voice or the faint sniffle from behind the visor. Was she sick? That poor Kal'Reegar sounded the same way when she'd said good morning to him in the mess hall earlier.

"Oh... um, thanks. See you later." Tali nodded her head a bit awkwardly and returned to her quick pace, disappearing into the anteroom leading to the lab.

_I wonder what they look like under those suits._ Kelly pondered it a moment with a smile before she returned to sorting Shepard's mail. She'd have a chat with the commander about it later. If anyone knew, he did. She'd just have to approach it... carefully.

* * *

It hadn't escaped Garrus' notice that Tali hadn't been in her assigned sleeper pod when he'd gone to sleep. Or that Shepard had some sort of mark on the side of his neck that resembled teeth marks. But he'd be damned if he'd say anything about either of those things without very carefully judging his friends' moods. He didn't fear bodily harm, but the thought of turian-watching becoming the Normandy crew's favorite activity sounded like a possible consequence of pissing Shepard off. He vividly remembered hearing the chewing out Williams and Pressly had received in Shepard's cabin about indiscreet comments regarding the non-humans. And Tali... well, hanar pornography on his visor was a worse possibility. He shuddered and attached his rifles to his back before grabbing Shepard's weapons and bringing them to the workbench to give them a good once-over and a cleaning. Jacob was off by the window overlooking the drive core working on what was probably his three hundredth abdominal crunch. He seemed particularly absorbed in his exercises for some reason, but it wasn't because of the cloaked thief that was watching with fascination. The Cerberus lieutenant may have been oblivious, but really, how could anyone miss the smell of that floral perfume? Garrus' nose twitched irritably while he disassembled the Mattock.

The sound of the door from CIC opening drew his attention and Shepard gave Garrus a faint smirk while he headed for the corridor to the briefing room, a metal carafe in hand. Despite the unnerving smile from his friend, there _did_ seem to be something of a bounce in his step. Ahh. He was bringing a 'thank you' gift to Mordin. If Joker found out, the pilot would be helplessly torn between exercising his irreverent tongue and keeping himself off the Normandy's viewscreens. "Garrus."

"Shepard. Any special requests?"

The commander paused and glanced at his weapons with an arched brow. "Cleaning my weapons for me? Well, it's a start. Nothing for me, but get an Eviscerator and a Carnifex prepped for Tali. Just leave them there when they're ready. Best not to give them to her yourself... just in case."

Shepard gave him another cruel smirk before vanishing behind the closing doors. Garrus sighed and shook his head. _Damn that salarian._

* * *

_I love this salarian._

Tali smiled to herself despite her dully throbbing head and the pressure in her sinuses while Mordin waved his omni-tool over her and examined the readings carefully. "Hmm... moderate reaction, as expected. Low risk of complications. Mild anti-inflammatory and a decongestant will ease most symptoms. Keep suit temperature cool to alleviate fever. Nothing to be done about runny nose, however. Recommend you stay aboard ship for observation."

Tali blinked. Stay aboard ship? True, she'd been anxious about heading to Illium and meeting Liara, though the events of the previous night put an evil and decidedly un-quarian grin on her face with juvenile satisfaction that she'd won the little competition. But whether or not Shepard learned he was alive only because Liara had recovered his body and given it to Cerberus, she still wanted to see her old friend and sort things out. Besides, even if she could do productive work in engineering, she wanted to be ready in case there was trouble. Given what Shepard had told her about all their previous recruiting missions, trouble seemed practically guaranteed, and she'd be damned if she'd let him go off without her. Even if he was a one-man wrecking crew, the reckless _bosh'tet_.

"I can't do that."

Mordin sniffed and shrugged. "Expected as much. Kal'Reegar said the same to Doctor Chakwas when she attempted to get him to go back to sleep." He walked over to a cabinet and opened a drawer, rummaging through dozens of medication vials. She hadn't expected _that_ reply. While she liked Karin Chakwas, she could be irritatingly pushy. And she was hardly surprised that Kal was probably out trying to make himself useful. "Would appreciate details on last night's activities, to document – anonymously, of course – for science."

Tali blinked. Perhaps she didn't love this salarian after all. Fortunately, Shepard came in at that moment and distracted Mordin with a carafe of coffee while she gazed at him and smiled. As if the excitable salarian _needed_ any more stimulation. She, on the other hand... damn. Illium was waiting. And she was already sick. Bah. Still, she tilted her head and stared at her boyfriend with a wistful grin.

* * *

Fortunately, Mordin only took a few sips before they docked and he accompanied them out of the airlock with Miranda, Jacob, and Garrus. The airlock smelled faintly of floral perfume before the decontamination routine began, but Shepard and Garrus only traded a quiet smirk. How the thief hadn't figured out why they always knew of her presence, they had no idea, but it was an entertaining secret. The turian's amusement didn't last long, however, when he saw silver eyes narrowed at him behind purple glass, and he immediately turned away. Miranda and Jacob seemed oblivious, the former quiet and composed. The armory officer was a different matter entirely, his brow deeply furrowed while he stared down at the deck with unfocused eyes.

"Jacob? Everything okay?" Brown eyes blinked and lifted to Shepard, who didn't miss the way Miranda seemed to pointedly glance away. Whatever was on Jacob's mind, she apparently knew something about it.

"It's... nothing, Commander. Just thinking." Jacob set his jaw and nodded firmly, but Shepard arched a brow at him and watched the lieutenant's lips tighten.

"All right. I'll beat it out of you later, all right?"

Jacob managed a quiet chuckle and a set a hand on his ribs meaningfully. "Yeah, all right, as long as you pull your punches. You hit like a krogan, Shepard."

Garrus groaned and rubbed at a mandible in remembered pain. "You don't exactly give out love taps yourself, Jacob. I'm sure Shepard remembers taking a few shots himself."

Tali suddenly seemed to glare between the three men, though she made a sniffling sound under her helmet that drew Miranda's attention before her vocal emitter lit up. "Is this how you all pass the time?" Sniffle. "Hitting each other?"

Shepard grinned and shrugged. Garrus did the same, glancing pointedly at the mark on the spectre's neck above the collar of his armor. "Old habits die hard. Who landed a blow on you this time, Shepard? Looks odd... Geth weapon?"

No one missed the way Tali suddenly stiffened, but the commander simply reached up to rub the bite mark with a fingertip. "Not sure. Might have been one of the colossus' legs. Damn thing was squirrely." Whatever it was, it had sharp teeth. And was hard to pin down.

"Hamster bites." Mordin spoke up while he, as usual, was poring over a datapad humming to himself. "Warned you not to fall asleep with it uncaged. Likely rolled over and frightened it."

Miranda was unreadable but Garrus looked disappointed while Jacob just shook his head slowly. Tali was an enigma to the others, but Shepard knew she was smiling and mouthing a 'thank you' to the salarian behind her vocal emitter. Her smile probably vanished when she sniffled again, though.

* * *

Liara stared at the video feed from the dock on her desktop terminal, watching breathlessly as Shepard emerged from the Normandy's airlock, only a couple of hundred meters away. And beside him were Tali and Garrus, who seemed none the worse for wear after what they'd been through in the past couple of weeks. Still, despite her relief, she felt her stomach tighten with anxiety at coming face to face with her quarian friend, especially after their last conversation. For two years, Tali had been the only real friend she had left after Garrus had all but vanished, but twenty minutes of conversation had... complicated things. Another familiar face caught her eye and she felt her anxiety double. Had Miranda told Shepard the truth about his recovery? Had Tali? Would he walk into her office with clenched fists and a tightened jaw, or...

"Goddess," she muttered, pressing a hand to her forehead and closing her eyes. Once more she wondered just what she'd allowed her life to turn into. What she'd allowed herself to turn into. Only the trilling of her terminal broke the moment of despair and she turned her full attention to the caller, a scowl twisting her face. Another deadbeat. Well, this was a problem she could solve, and she intended to resolve the matter once and for all.

* * *

Her veneer of deadly calm broke just in time for her to hear her office door open and it took all her willpower to finish her threat without melting back into the shy archaeologist who would turn and start crying at the sight of her old friends. The image of her client swallowing nervously before the feed cut off gave her a brief moment of satisfaction, but then there were no distractions. Just the sound of feet shifting behind her and the faint, familiar scent of weapon oil and combat armor. It was odd, but that simple smell made her smile softly as she remembered sharing a ravenous meal in the mess hall after finishing off those geth bases in the Armstrong Nebula. They'd all simply plopped down while still in their armor and dug into their trays - and tube of nutrient paste - with gusto, flush with victory, grinning and making jokes.

The memory flashed through her mind in a split second and brought the hint of a tear to her eye, but she was still smiling as she turned around and saw Shepard waiting patiently with Tali and Garrus flanking him. Despite the six dancing fingers at Tali's waist, Liara couldn't help but quickly step forward and wrap her arms around her human friend while she practically whispered his name.

* * *

Tali's apprehension about meeting Liara had been obvious, but he had a feeling it was about more than just their past rivalry for his affections. Shepard had a generous amount of self-confidence, but he wasn't _that _conceited. He'd gently nudged her as they'd passed through Nos Astra's trading floor and inquired quietly, but she'd just sniffled and shaken her head, muttering about how it was nothing. It wasn't a convincing performance, but he gave her a quick smile and discreetly squeezed her hand in his. That had seemed to help. He knew she'd tell him if it was important, so he'd let his worries subside.

They returned in full, however, when he heard Liara's voice for the first time in what felt like only a few weeks. In the curiously formal dresses asari women tended to wear, with her voice deceptively sweet, something felt uncomfortably different about her. Despite all the chaotic and shocking changes he'd had to deal with since awakening, it hadn't quite managed to feel like two years had passed. Until that moment, when his shy, soft-spoken friend was openly threatening someone with death about money of all things.

But a few seconds later, she quietly spoke his name and wrapped her arms around him for a warm hug, and she was the Liara he'd known, giving him the hello he'd expected. While he couldn't deny many things had changed, at least one of the important things hadn't changed completely. "I knew you were alive, but it's... it's so good to see you." Her voice was a soft, sweet whisper, filled with emotion, and he hugged her a little tighter.

"It's good to see you too, Liara," he said quietly before he drew back and smiled. She released him and she stepped back with the flash of her own smile. It faded quickly, however, when she glanced at Garrus and Tali and her body language changed again. She was the information broker once more as she gestured to chairs and took a seat behind her desk. Shepard glanced back at Garrus and Tali with a slight frown and Garrus only shrugged while Tali's head bowed slightly. As he took a seat, his stomach began to tighten uncomfortably. He had a feeling he was missing something important, after all.

"Nice to see you too, Liara," Garrus spoke up with his usual dry sarcasm as he remained standing with arms folded across his armored chest.

"After leaving Tali and I in the dark about how you were doing for almost a year, I'd say you had that coming," Liara replied evenly. Tali quietly took a seat beside Shepard who glanced at her with concern, but she was staring off into a corner of the room, only breaking her silence to sniffle.

"Right, because you weren't mysterious at all when you dropped off the grid for a couple of weeks right after Shepard's memorial service."

The commander tensed at that and saw Tali's head drooped slightly over to the side. He'd avoided watching that particular recording, but perhaps it would help fill in some of the blanks. Liara also stiffened a bit, but she smoothly put the mask of calm professionalism back on. She suddenly reminded him of... Benezia. The thought gave him a faint chill.

"It's good to see all of you, Garrus. I'm sorry we haven't stayed in touch like we promised, but perhaps I can help you now." The smile that came to her lips was forced and Shepard resisted the urge to sigh. It seemed as if the presence of Tali and Garrus would make it impossible to get anything out of her, and they did have business to conduct. Pushing aside his disappointment, he held up a hand toward Garrus and frowned at Liara.

"First thing's first: are you working for the Shadow Broker?" True, the Illusive Man had mentioned in a later conversation that his sources may have been incorrect about her possible affiliations, but he still felt the need to ask the question. Especially after the man had theorized that Wilson had been operating on behalf of the Broker. Shepard expected some shade of discomfort, but instead her eyes narrowed and a tight, cruel smiled played across her lips.

"Is that why you never responded to me?" Liara laughed softly, a cold, strange sound. "Hardly. I'm hunting him."

Tali finally looked his way and he met her gaze with surprise. "Hunting him? The Shadow Broker?" Shepard eyed Liara curiously while Garrus chuckled behind him.

"Don't tell me you've developed a taste for taking down the galaxy's hardest targets."

A ghost of a smile curled Liara's lips. "Not like you have, Garrus. But I have my reasons."

The turian coughed. "Yeah, well. Got to keep busy somehow. But-"

"Why are you hunting the Shadow Broker, Liara?"

To Shepard's surprise, it was Tali who asked the question, her voice soft and still sounding a bit stuffy. But it was Liara's reaction that drew his attention: she flinched and her lips drew into a thin line. _What the hell is going on here?_

"I'd... rather not say, Tali."

"Why not? Aren't we your friends?" An edge crept into her voice and she leaned forward in her chair. "Do friends keep secrets from each other?"

Shepard had never seen Tali so cool and abrupt. Her elevator spats with Garrus had been defensive and she'd eventually restored to remaining silent. But now she was on the attack, and Liara was clasping her hands nervously atop her desk. He found his surprise suddenly giving way to anger, as he was thoroughly sick of secrets and games. Cerberus was one thing. His friends were another.

"Tali, I-"

"Enough!" Both women started at Shepard's raised voice and turned toward him as he rose to his feet and glared at both of them. "One of you is going to tell me what the hell is going on here." When they didn't answer, his voice fell to a growl. "Now."

Liara sighed and bowed her head. "I... recovered your body."

Shepard blinked. "You what?"

"From the Shadow Broker. He was going to sell you to the Collectors." Liara had been staring at her desktop, but she raised her blue eyes to his with trepidation. He stared at them in stunned silence for a moment before turning to Tali. "...You knew about this?"

Liara preempted Tali's reply. "I told her after you met on Freedom's Progress. We argued about it, and she wanted to tell you, but I asked her to let me do it."

"And you tried to back out of your promise," Tali said with irritation, sniffling and folding her arms across her chest.

"This is Illium, Tali!" Liara hissed. "Anything we say may be recorded! I was going to invite you to my apartment to talk about this later."

Tali's glowing eyes blinked hard behind her visor and the office was silent but for the sound of another sniffle. Garrus finally spoke up after meeting Shepard's shocked stare for a few moments. "So... you gave Shepard to...?" He couldn't hide the look of distaste that even his alien friends recognized. Liara simply nodded, and silence filled the office again.

_The Collectors, and by extension the Reapers, have some disturbing fascination with me. Liara took on the Shadow Broker to recover my body... then gave me to __**Cerberus**__. Who spent billions to resurrect me._

A jumble of confused thoughts were echoing in his mind, but there was no sorting them out at the moment and he broke the silence with a tired voice. "I need a drink."

Tali and Liara were stunned to see Shepard turn and lead Garrus out the door, leaving them alone.

* * *

Jack muttered a curse and dropped onto her cot while she pulled up the information she'd finally been forwarded from the Cerberus bitch. Shepard had apparently remembered to tell her to get off her ass after getting a not-quite-playful reminder at the tip of a chef's knife the night before, even if he'd grinned instead of cowering. Between Horizon and Haestrom he lived up to his reputation on the battlefield, but he was a damned boy scout when out of his armor, letting Cerberus jerk him around, playing nice with the crew. Probably nailed Lawson behind the back of his quarian, though, and vice versa. Smirking, she lay on her back and repositioned her pistol at her side before she began skimming the contents of the files.

Five minutes later, she snarled and threw the datapad into a bulkhead hard enough to shatter it.

* * *

_"Liara T'Soni may be involved with the Shadow Broker."_

He remembered the Illusive Man's words with a scowl while people hurried out of the way of the scowling, armored human and his bulky turian colleague. "That son of a bitch. He knew Liara wasn't working for the Shadow Broker, but he played with me."

Garrus opened his mouth, but nothing came to mind. Besides, Shepard kept speaking with scarcely a pause. "Probably worried I'd run off the reservation and go looking for her instead of heading to Omega."

_He was probably right._ Garrus wisely didn't voice the thought. He would have done the same, but it wasn't a good time to agree with anything the Illusive Man said.

"When we don't need him anymore, he's a dead man. And Liara? What the fuck was she thinking? Shipping me to the same _bastards_ who killed fifty of my men!" Shepard suddenly stopped, apparently ignorant of all the stares he was receiving, and spun about. They'd been headed for the Normandy, but Garrus followed him back toward Liara's office while his friend continued as if he hadn't stopped. He'd been shocked to hear the news and almost as surprised at Liara's demeanor, but Shepard's reaction was nearly as unexpected. He tended towards irritation instead of anger, and he'd seemed more at ease after the previous night than he had since his resurrection.

"Shepard, you might not want to-"

"We're not heading back to her office, Garrus. There's a bar that way." He flicked his head toward the end of the trading floor and kept marching along.

"That wasn't what I was going to say." He drew up alongside his friend but hesitated to continue. Perhaps it would be better said after Shepard had a few drinks in him... if that would even do the trick. His implants seemed to give him a freakish metabolism. Shepard glared at him expectantly, solving the dilemma. Garrus sighed. "If you hadn't gone to Omega first, I'd be dead. And if Cerberus hadn't gotten hold of you, you'd _still_ be dead."

He took Shepard's arm and pulled him lightly to a stop in a corner by some stairs, setting his jaw and ignoring the hostile glare he was receiving from cold blue eyes. "Look, Shepard... the Normandy's gone. It wasn't a week, it was two years. We've all changed, some for the worse. And the galaxy's as screwed up as when you left it, only we've got two fewer years to prepare for the Reapers. I get it." Shepard's mouth opened, but Garrus shook his head and continued. "I'm not saying don't get pissed. But you know better than to go into a blood rage without thinking."

Shepard snorted. "Garrus, the bar is where I'm going to do my thinking." _Oh. Well, true, he hasn't killed or screamed at anyone yet. "_And you haven't _seen_ me in a blood rage."

His friend turned and headed for the stairs, leaving Garrus to stare at his back while he thought over just what his friend said. A determined Shepard was a sight to see. But in a rage? Idly, he wondered if he'd want to be in the same system if _that _ever happened. Probably not, he decided, moving to catch up. If it _did_ happen, Wrex would undoubtedly want video.

* * *

"That didn't go as I'd hoped," Liara sighed, leaning back in her chair and closing her eyes after the door shut.

Her boyfriend had shouted at her and left her behind. That thought left Tali stunned enough to nod in agreement with Liara while she slumped in her own chair and sighed down at her entwined fingers, sniffling again in what had become a regular pattern every ten seconds. The two women were silent for a full minute before muttered despondently. "So much for a happy reunion. I'm... sorry, though. I didn't give you a chance."

"It's all right, Tali. I should have mentioned the possibility of eavesdropping earlier."

The engineer nodded in agreement and sniffled again, finally frowning with irritation at her runny nose and muttering. "_Bosh'tet._"

Liara looked up at her curiously. "Are you sick?"

"Um... a little. Shepard and the others rescued my squad from a geth attack yesterday." Tali decided to let Liara draw her own conclusions.

"Goddess. I'm glad you're all right." _Sure you are,_ Tali thought irritably. "I... tried, but I couldn't find any information on your mission."

"That's a _good_ thing," Tali responded dryly. "Classified missions are supposed to be classified."

"Then... how did Shepard find out?"

Tali blinked at that. She hadn't even thought about it, and the obvious answer made her stomach clench. "His... employer, I guess. The bastards."

Liara met Tali's gaze for a moment before she sighed and stood. "Do you want to go to my apartment? We can talk freely there."

She didn't miss the way Tali hesitated, fingers writhing at her waist while she glanced back at the door. Finally she sighed and shook her head resolutely. Even if he'd left her behind, she wouldn't do the same. "Not without Shepard."

Liara stared for a moment with suspicion in her eyes before she gestured toward the door and smiled faintly. "Let's go find him and settle this. I'd like to be able to sleep tonight."

Tali stifled a sigh and rose. She'd been hoping to fall asleep again on a soft bed with the soft sounds of music and Shepard's breathing keeping the silence at bay, but that possibility seemed in jeopardy. Still, it was a good enough reason to follow Liara, even if she wanted to go another week without speaking to her.

* * *

Eternity was a far cry from the seedy Chora's Den in the Citadel wards where he, Garrus, and Wrex had spent their first moments in a bar together. It hadn't been relaxing, though Wrex and Garrus had enjoyed the outcome, when Fist was lying dead in a pool of blood. To Shepard's surprise, he saw Jacob and Miranda had made it to the bar ahead of them. Judging by the empty glass on the table and the one Jacob was working on at that moment, they had set out for it from the time they landed. Shepard had expected them to be the only two on the crew who would promptly attend to their duty and only their duty instead of finding a bar (or in Mordin's case, a Saronis Applications kiosk). Seeing Jacob speaking quietly with downcast eyes while Miranda listened patiently made him curious enough to disregard his usual tact and walk their way. Miranda glanced at them and said something to Jacob, who lifted his head and flinched.

"Commander. I, uh..."

"Forget about it. You're not the only one who wanted a drink." Shepard moved toward another table, but Miranda stood and gestured at her chair.

"Take mine, Shepard. I think Jacob has something to say, and I need to get to work." She nodded at the three of them and promptly headed for the exit while Garrus made his way toward the bar. Shepard took Miranda's vacated chair and resisted the instinctive urge to watch her depart. Genetic perfection tended to attract the eye, even if it didn't quite rise to the level of mesmerizing.

Leaning back in his chair, Shepard sighed and rubbed at the back of his neck while Jacob stared down into his drink. "One of those days, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for another moment, both waiting for the other to speak first. Jacob took the initiative. "Sorry I'm a bit distracted, Shepard. I, uh... got pinged by a ghost last night."

* * *

Miranda sighed quietly and swept her hair over her shoulder as she stepped out of the bar. Hopefully Shepard would get matters settled, though he'd looked as conflicted as Jacob had. Perhaps she hadn't heard what she'd thought she'd heard last night, after all. That brought a hint of a smile to her lips as she pulled up her 'shopping' list on her omni-tool, but it vanished when she nearly bumped into a pair of women. Tali's purple visor instantly drew her gaze. She nodded at the quarian and turned her attention to the asari, blinking with surprise.

"Miss Lawson," Liara said coolly.

Tali stiffened at that, snapping her gaze between the two women. "What? You _know_ her?"

Miranda said nothing, but Liara sighed. "Yes, Tali. She was my contact for... you know."

_Oh, just lovely._ Miranda bit back a sigh. The quarian was hostile enough at Cerberus already, and suspicious of her. Now, apparently, she knew the history behind the Lazarus Project's origins. "A pleasure to see you again, Doctor. I have business to attend to. Excuse me." She slipped past the silver glare of Tali and exhaled a slow breath while shaking her head.

"I can't believe she... I just... this keeps getting better and better." Tali muttered irritably, brushing past Liara and resuming her stalk toward the bar. If her luck held, Chiktikka would be the only one on the ship or the planet she'd feel comfortable spending any time with. And she was a piece of tech.

"Would you rather he was still dead?" Liara inquired quietly at her side while she read something on her omni-tool.

"What!? No! I just... keelah, Liara, this is all insane! And... we can't talk about it here." Tali quieted with an irritated sniffle as they entered the bar, but Liara hesitated at the top step. Tali turned to see her staring intently at her omni-tool.

"Tali, come here a moment." When the quarian stood at her shoulder gazing down at her omni-tool, Liara changed it to Khelish output. "Is this why you're on Illium?"

Tali read for a moment before blinking at the two familiar names. "Yes. Why?"

"I don't think you have much time. We'd better tell Shepard."

The two hurried across the bar to where Jacob and the commander were sharing a drink and speaking quietly while Garrus chatted up the asari bartender. Neither noticed the glance she gave Liara that lasted a curiously long moment.

When Tali and Liara approached, Shepard grimaced slightly. Despite Jacob's efforts, he'd recognized how important finding his father was to him, and it struck a chord. Two years later he'd found his closest friends again... and then he'd stormed out on two of them without having a full conversation about the matter. Sometimes it was easy to forget that the lives they led could lead to another parting with unspoken words and unresolved conflicts, and that separation would undoubtedly last a lot longer than two years. So he gave them a soft smile when they approached, but Tali waved Garrus over and gestured for Jacob to stay seated while Liara forwarded some information to his omni-tool. When he read it, a frown slowly formed on his lips. Why their prospective recruits seemed to require immediate attention, he wasn't sure, but at the moment it was secondary to coming up with a plan.

* * *

"All right, here's the deal," Shepard said when the squad was gathered in the conference room back aboard the Normandy. Garrus pulled up the data on the display. "Our two prospective recruits are Thane Krios, a drell assassin, and Samara, an asari Justicar. It looks like the former is on the hunt when dusk falls, and the odds aren't in his favor. Garrus?"

The lights dimmed and they all turned their attention to a pair of high-rise buildings that the turian pulled up as he took over the briefing. "Right. Looks like he's going after, ah, an old acquaintance of some of us: Nassana Dantius. She's holed up here. Dantius Towers. Secured by Eclipse mercs, and a whole damn company of them. The reports say he's a stealthy one, but still... those are long odds."

Kasumi nodded her agreement and leaned toward the projection, examining the blueprints. "You're right. Even I would think twice about taking on a target like that. I mean, I probably still _would_, but I'd think twice about it. And I'm the best at this sort of thing." She smiled but kept examining the blueprints.

"Keep talking, Kasumi. We didn't invite you to our bash just to collect our party favors." She shot a smirk at Shepard.

"None of you have good stuff, anyways. Hmm... okay, so her office is the penthouse of building A, but that one's pretty locked down. Building B is still under construction, a lot of holes in the security... hm." She drummed her fingers on the table contemplatively.

"Why not just smash the front door down and kill them all?" Grunt inquired in his usual abrupt fashion.

"Or write him off. Shit, no need to get killed just for another gun. Lots of them out there, you know."

"His skillset, Jack. There are lots of biotics out there, but you're our wrecking ball. Samara will have her own part to play. And Grunt, because we'd get so bogged down with a wave of mercs that Krios might find it easy enough to waltz in, kill his target, and slip out before we reach him." The bald biotic rolled her eyes, glared, and slumped back in her chair. Grunt considered that for a moment before nodding reluctantly. It made sense.

"What about landing on the top of building B?" Kasumi asked, manipulating the holo-image to examine the roof.

"No good," Zaeed answered gruffly. "They might be Eclipse, but they're not _that_ stupid. They'll have heavy weapons on the rooftops. Goddamn suicide unless you blow them all to hell from a ship."

"Which isn't exactly subtle." Shepard frowned and rubbed his chin. "Kasumi, do you think you could hack the security if we went in the front door?"

The thief beamed from the shadow of her hood. "Please, Shep. Remember who you're talking to."

"A human with the strangest face paint." Garrus' quip drew a few chuckles and got him a raspberry from Kasumi.

"All right. Mordin, Grunt, Jack, you're with us."

Miranda raised a brow in amusement. "You're taking a krogan and a... 'wrecking ball'... on a stealth mission?"

Shepard chuckled. "It might not _stay_ a stealth mission. And if I end up fighting off a company of mercs, a krogan and biotic battering ram might come in handy." Grunt grinned and Jack shot the XO a nasty smirk. "The rest go with you while you're off tracking down the justicar. Apparently, she's been making the local cops nervous and there might be a merc connection there, too."

Zaeed's eyes had been closed but he suddenly was sitting upright. "I volunteer."

"I'm shocked," Shepard said dryly. "I already volunteered you. No guarantee they're Blue Suns, though." He ignored the look of disappointment on Zaeed's face. "Any questions?"

"Uh, yeah, I've got one," Garrus responded. "If there's no real plan for the justicar 'mission', why aren't _you_ taking it? No plan is sort of your specialty." He glanced pointedly at Tali, who rolled her eyes behind her visor while Jack snorted.

"Yeah, putting the Cerberus bitch in charge isn't much of a-"

"Give it a rest, Jack," Shepard said quietly. She only sneered and shrugged her shoulders.

"Just because you're the ice queen's white knight or boy toy doesn't mean-"

"Shut your mouth, Jack, or I'll shut it for you."

The room went dead silent at the sound of Shepard's cold voice and eight pairs of eyes glanced between the staring contest suddenly taking place between the commander and the unstable convict. Jack looked startled briefly, but her eyes quickly burned with anger and her fists took on a blue glow. "Fuck you, Shepard! I didn't join up to get ordered around by assholes who don't keep their promises."

"Clear the room." He didn't drop his gaze from Jack while the rest of the squad quickly stood and headed for the exit. Grunt, Tali, and Garrus hesitated, but Shepard shot them a glare and they reluctantly exited. When the doors shut behind them, he returned his attention to Jack, who was still staring angrily at him. "You were saying?"

She scoffed. "Don't play dumb with me, asshole. The files you sent me were wiped cleaner than your quarian pet's food. Who would have guessed the great Commander Shepard would turn into a Cerberus lapdog?" Shepard's eyes narrowed to slits while he started walking toward her and his own fists flared with blue, but Jack's sneer only widened. "I heard about Akuze. I'm sure all your men would be _so _proud of you, kissing the Illusive Man's ass-"

Jack suddenly found herself blinking hard to clear her vision after his fist split her lip and sent her head bouncing hard off the bulkhead. He was a lot faster than she expected, but she was tougher than _he_ expected. Snarling, Jack shoved her hands toward his chest and slammed him full-force with a shockwave that launched him across the room over the briefing table. His vision blurred after the impact of his own head on the wall, but he landed in a crouch as Jack yelled and ran toward him with a cocked, glowing fist.

* * *

The squad was silent outside the door, trading glances and expressions of alarm... or anticipation, in Zaeed's case. Tali stood beside Garrus against the wall of the corridor, avoiding Miranda's gaze when she looked their way. The quiet of the room left the turian suddenly uneasy, and he spoke up with a chuckle to ease the tension. "Fifty on Shepard."

Grunt scoffed but Zaeed chuckled. "What odds you giving?"

The sound of biotics and the quiver in the deckplates made a lot of eyes go wide and Tali was the first to key the door, but Garrus pushed her aside and stepped in first, pistol in hand. Miranda came up beside him, biotics glowing at the ready, but they saw Shepard standing over an unconscious Jack with blood on his knuckles and the back of his neck and an angry scowl on his lips when he turned toward them. "Grunt, Zaeed. Haul her ass to Chakwas and tell her to keep her unconscious. I'll deal with her later." They stepped in to carry out his order while the others made way for the commander as he exited. "Everyone else, get prepped. Miranda, with me."

As the XO quickly fell in behind him as he headed into the armory and out of sight, the squad dispersed. Garrus and Tali lagged behind until the corridor was empty.

"Keelah!" She blurted, coughing from the sudden dryness in her throat.

"I was going to say 'Spirits', but yeah, 'Keelah' works too." Garrus sighed and stroked his recovering mandible with a talon. "Actually, maybe we should be relieved that he can take down the crazed biotic before we can even get inside the room."

Tali's fingers were doing their customary squirming at her waist while she stared down at them. She was very familiar with how protective Shepard was of his crew, but hearing him jump to the defense of the genetically perfect Cerberus human woman was... no, she was being stupid. After all, he'd done the same for her. Less violently, but still. The memory brought a faint smile to her lips. "Do you remember when Shepard yelled at Pressly and Ashley?"

"Heh. How could I forget?" He draped a hand on her shoulder and grinned. "Don't think I've heard him shout like that since. He must really like quarians... or something."

Tali grinned behind her visor. True. A little bellowing about indiscreet comments had shamed the XO and gunnery chief into apologizing. Wrex had been indifferent, Garrus had quietly uttered his thanks, but Tali and Liara had been embarrassed about it all, which endeared them to the humans a bit. Shepard seemed to find a way to protect his crew from anything, including itself. She bit her lip with concern, though, as she wondered if he would need protecting from one of his crew.

* * *

"We... may have made a mistake choosing Jack as a candidate," Miranda admitted when they stood outside the elevator on the engineering deck, looking down into the hangar. "I could contact the Illusive Man and ask-"

"Not yet," Shepard replied as he watched Kal'Reegar wearily lift a thruster pack into position on the quarian shuttle despite the coughs that appeared to be shaking his frame. "Remember Omega? Not everyone learns a lesson the easy way." He folded his arms and stroked at his chin thoughtfully, ignoring the drying blood on the back of his head and knuckles. "I won't tolerate pissing matches on my ship. Rivalries and competition are one thing. Insubordination and blatant disrespect are another." He turned to see Miranda nodding her head in agreement but she stopped when he fixed her with a cool stare. "I told you to give her access to files about her, not to redact them and leave me to deal with the mess. I want datapads with all the pertinent info, and I mean _all_ of it on her medbay bed before you depart."

Miranda flinched at the revelation of the fight's origin, but recovered quickly enough to instinctively frown at his demand. "Shepard, the Illusive Man-"

"Will review the recordings and see that I punched her when she accused me of being a Cerberus lapdog after she brought up Akuze. That won't earn me any points." He scowled and returned his attention to Kal'Reegar's obvious exhaustion. "But you can either leave Jack pissed off, and me along with her, or take a chance on leaving us both satisfied. Your call. Dismissed."

She knew better than to argue the point, especially when it was a good one. Miranda withheld her sigh until the elevator doors closed behind her. The information was old and outdated anyways, and all parties involved were long gone.

* * *

"Is everything okay?"

Shepard turned at the sound of the hesitant but familiar voice while he strapped on his leg armor to see Tali standing at his cabin door, fingers wriggling together. "Nothing to worry about, I think. Jack and I will either have a nice, long talk or another short fight." He grinned at her, but it seemed lacking in its sincerity.

"I hope it's the first one," she replied dryly, watching him turn back around to buckle his belt. "Well... I'll go get my weapons. Um... you did want me going with Miranda and Garrus, right?"

"No, I want you to go with me, but I need Kasumi and you're better at pure tech than Mordin is." He picked up his torso armor and turned to face her with a faint smile while he started strapping it on. "Yes, I'm worried about you. Yes, I'd feel better having you close by. But you'd glare at me and call me names in Khelish for giving you special treatment, wouldn't you?"

"Heh. Definitely." She would have preferred to be beside him as well, but he was right.

"Unless it's the use of my shower. I think that might have been your insidious plot all along. Hmm..." He pretended to ponder that while she smirked and walked over to help him with the straps on his armor.

"Maybe. I _am_ feeling a bit congested again." They shared a little smile, but there was an awkward silence while they worked. When the last strap was tightened down, Tali moved to step back but he took hold of her waist gently.

"Tali, about earlier... I'm sorry. I wasn't angry at you." He sighed. "Tracking down Saren was a lot simpler than this. Find an objective, go hit it. Now it's Cerberus, the Collectors, the Reapers, secrets everywhere, a psychopath on the crew." Shepard chuckled humorlessly. "And I'm a zombie. Who the Collectors want for... I don't want to know."

She shivered at that thought. Miranda had told them about Horizon during their tour of the ship the day before, and it had been disturbing... to say the least. "I know. And it's okay. I just... I don't know anything about..."

"Being in a relationship?" He finished the thought with a wry smile. "Well, I wasn't very good at it the first few times I tried it. I have a good feeling this time, though. Better motivation, maybe. Human women couldn't make a suit look nearly as good as you do."

"_Bosh'tet_, she muttered, blushing but smiling as she hugged him. "Remind me to tell Miranda you said that."

They shared a laugh before Garrus' voice came over the comm. _"Tali, you coming? We're ready down here."_

"Speaking of _bosh'tets_..." Shepard muttered, making Tali giggle.

"_I heard that."_

She slipped out of his embrace and sighed. "I'm coming, Garrus. Tali out. Now, I have to visit Mordin before I leave, thanks to you."

"You're welcome." He smiled and walked with her toward the exit. "Send Kal'Reegar up to the medbay for me. I'm not sure how he's escaped Chakwas' attention, but he looks like hell. If he tries to argue, tell him he'll be stuck aboard a Cerberus ship until we're on the Citadel if he doesn't recover faster."

"He _might_ listen if I put it that way." Tali stopped at the door and held him up with a finger pointed at his chest. "Just so you know... I'm fighting a fever, my sinuses keep trying to fill up with something I can't even describe, and these sniffles make me want to pull my shotgun on you." Hitting the door panel, she stepped out with a glance over her shoulder, shining eyes somehow looking mischievous behind the purple visor while her voice held a coy note despite her congestion. "...And it was totally worth it."

Laughing, Shepard followed her into the elevator. "Just so _you_ know... I got a gunshot wound and three cracked ribs... and I wholeheartedly agree. Oh, and some strange new geth weapon got me on the neck."

"_Bosh'tet_," Tali laughed as the doors shut.

* * *

Shepard entered the medbay with his weapons strapped on to see Karin Chakwas glaring at him. "As if I didn't get enough work yesterday saving two critically wounded quarians." She glanced at them, still unconscious and enclosed in sterile fields around their beds. "But you have to get into a fight with one of humanity's most powerful biotics? Really, Shepard."

He shrugged and walked to the bed where Jack lay asleep, her split lip well on its way to healing from medi-gel. The bruises on the back of her head and her temple would take longer to fade. "It was worth the risk... probably. Is she fit for a mission if you wake her up?"

Karin scoffed. "I don't want to be on this ship when she wakes up... but if her old scars are any indication, she could likely bear a couple of aches and still function normally. No promises, however."

He picked up a trio of datapads that were lying on the bed at Jack's side and smiled tightly, skimming through the contents before setting them back down. "Wake her up and step outside, please. Don't worry, I'm charged up, armed and armored."

Rolling her eyes, Karin injected a dose into Jack's forearm and stepped back, heading for the door. "It's not you I'm worried about. If my medbay gets destroyed..." She let the threat hang in the air. " And we need to talk later in your cabin, young man." The stern, motherly tone of voice told him it was about Tali, and he waved her out irritably. Damned doctors. He moved across the medbay out of Jack's line of sight and waited.

It was a minute before she stirred, groaning quietly and slowly blinking awake before her eyes snapped open and she rocketed upward in bed, fists clenched and chest heaving. She didn't seem the type to be at all relaxed waking up in a strange environment. Her eyes flicked around for a moment before she seemed to calm, and she glanced down to eye the datapads with some confusion, picking them up.

He stepped into view and folded his arms. "The unabridged and non-redacted versions. Or so I ordered, at least. Let me know if they're not."

Jack stiffened and glared at him, but when he stopped calmly halfway across the medbay, she relaxed slightly. "Guess I hit you harder than you expected."

Shepard laughed, which seemed to unnerve her. "And I hit you harder than _you_ expected, I bet. So, are we going to try again, or are we going to agree that neither of us is here to screw over the other?"

Jack's scowl faded into a frown that resembled resignation while she glanced down at the datapads, scanning the contents of one. "Maybe you thought you could get away with it. Maybe it was just the cheerleader. Either way, you'll screw me over sooner or later. Everyone fucks over everyone else."

"Anyone who fucks with my crew has me to deal with, Jack. You learned that lesson an hour ago." He didn't flinch under her returning glare as he leaned against Chakwas' desk. "Turian, quarian, human, Cerberus. Doesn't matter. You cross anyone on this ship, you cross me. And if they cross you, they cross me. Miranda learned that lesson, too." She didn't seem convinced, but her eyes did soften slightly. Shrugging, he gestured with his head toward the door. "You can stay behind on Illium if you want. I'm not going to kill you to keep you here. But if you stay, and survive all this, you'll walk away with a small fortune, some good weapons, a spectre owing you a favor, and maybe a friend or two. All you've got to do is follow my orders and don't cross the others."

Jack's veneer of anger fell away into contemplation while she stared down at the datapads, frowning. After a long moment, she sighed. "Fuck. Fine, all right. I'll stay... for now. But only because I'm not getting off on some world full of stuck-up asari bitches." She glared at him while he headed for the exit, but it seemed a bit forced. "Just don't even think about hitting me again. Or trying to order me to clean toilets. Or whatever crap runs through your kinky mind."

He smirked and paused in the doorway. "I don't even want to know. We're about to head out. If you're up to it, grab your gear. Otherwise, enjoying your reading."

Jack stared hard at the doors when they closed before she stared down at the datapads.


	23. Dangerous aliens

**Author's note:**

_(Sick of these yet?)_

_The chapters seem to be getting longer, don't they? This one's quite action-packed to make up for all the fluffy bunnies you were forced to pet over the last couple of months. Of course, if you don't like fluffy bunnies, something is wrong with you.  
_

_Thanks for the reviews regarding the character interaction. It's nice to know something's going quite well, because sometimes when I think back on how much more could be in this story, I wonder if I've made a mistake. (Of course, that would make this thing 200,000 words just to this point already, probably...) Enjoy._

* * *

With the Normandy sitting idly in dock, Joker hadn't objected to piloting the shuttle that would drop them off at Dantius Towers. After all, he had a feeling they would need their asses pulled out of the fire. Though not part of the ground team, he'd often watched the recordings of their missions to get a feel for what they went through, sometimes to his regret. The Thorian and its creepers on Feros had been worse than any horror movie he'd watched before, and the discussion Shepard had with the possessed Collector while Ashley was at gunpoint on Horizon chilled him to the bone. Why every single mission they seemed to go on ended up with protracted firefights was a mystery to him, and not an entertaining one.

Glancing back over his shoulder, he saw Shepard standing by a seated Kasumi and Mordin while they reviewed the mission plan. During one of their idle discussions in the cockpit, Garrus had mentioned how often their missions ended up being barely planned and improvised despite their commander's extensive training and experience. He couldn't disagree. Hell, their extensive planning on Virmire had ended up losing them a squadmate, but then they just charged off to Ilos, through the Conduit to a Reaper-attacked Citadel, and ended the threat without any further losses. Seeing Shepard plan was starting to make him nervous. But not nearly as nervous as the brown eyes he found glaring at him. Joker quickly turned his attention back to his console.

* * *

"Pussy," Jack muttered to herself when Joker turned away from her gaze. The krogan and the scarred-up merc were the only ones with any spine, it seemed... other than Shepard. She paid close attention to him but was careful not to look his way. She wasn't in the mood for another conversation; the promise of combat was what had brought her along. Venting her anger on mercs seemed like a better idea than going after the spectre again. What he lacked biotically in control and range of ability, he made up for with the tech the Cerberus bitch had stuck in him... and that charge. Her jaw still ached, and her shoulder and hip from an impact against the bulkhead she didn't remember.

He was a confusing bastard. During their off time after Horizon he'd come down to the subdeck to check up on her, but that had ended quickly enough. Friendly chats were never just friendly. At least Grunt and Zaeed were simple enough. They brought booze and wanted to hear or trade stories, not play nice or weasel their way into her pants. And from them she learned more about the ship and crew without having to go deal with them herself. She'd been irritated to find half the crew in the mess hall after Haestrom, but she'd been hungry. Why she'd consented to help make dinner... that was a mystery. An annoying one. Scowling, she pushed the thought aside and checked her pistol again.

* * *

"It's not much of a plan, but..." Kasumi shrugged. "Zaeed seems to know what he's talking about, so the roof's out of the question. Blowing windows and leaping inside wouldn't be very subtle, either."

Shepard and Mordin traded a glance and the salarian shrugged. "True. Security terminal in the lobby likely the best bet." He frowned slightly. "Not sure why you wanted me along. Have fifteen projects in various stages of progress back on Normandy."

"Fifteen?" Kasumi stared. "How do you find time to sleep? And what are they?"

"Salarians need little sleep. Unproductive. Need for eight hours should have been genetically modified out of humans." Mordin didn't notice the humans' raised brows, as he'd buried himself in his omni-tool again. "And many projects. Running simulations with EDI regarding weapon upgrades, shield upgrades. Continuing work on quarian immune system, reviewing genophage, examining Joker's Vrolik Syndrome, attempting to isolate source of varren scale itch aboard ship, et cetera."

"Genophage?" Shepard asked.

"Varren scale itch?" Kasumi looked curious.

Mordin hesitated for a moment. "Mentioned genophage?" He stole a glance at Grunt, but the krogan was engrossed in something on his omni-tool that looked like a book. "Long story."

"And the scale itch?" Shepard found himself suddenly quite curious about the genophage, but discussing it with a salarian geneticist in tight quarters with a large krogan seemed... problematic, as Mordin would say. So he stuck with a less risky topic.

"Sexually transmitted disease, only carried by varren." Shepard and Kasumi shared a look of horror while Mordin sniffed. "Implications... unpleasant."

"Understatement, Mordin." Shepard shook his head and glanced at the display on the bulkhead. "Almost there. Grunt, Jack! Get ready."

* * *

Garrus and Tali followed Miranda and Jacob from ten meters back as they walked through Nos Astra. The trading floor was a different place at night, quiet and cast in soft neon lights and shadows. The skyline of the city, impressive during the day, became breathtaking at night when the stars and nebulae gave the smooth asari architecture an ethereal, mesmerizing quality. It was the kind of view that had let Tali ease her troubles throughout her childhood, when she'd find a quiet viewport on the Rayya and lose herself in the cosmos. That night, however, Dantius Towers kept her attention from their prominent and well-lit place overlooking the city.

"I'm more worried that they'll come back with worn-out weapons and that they'll need a long decontamination shower to get all the merc blood off them." Garrus smiled to hear Tali chuckle. Despite his amusement at Shepard and Tali's expense, he was glad to see there wouldn't be another round of long, drawn-out romance drama aboard the ship. And _perhaps_ he was glad to see them happy, even if it appeared to make him the one to cheer Tali up when Shepard wasn't around. "Shepard and a krogan? Not much out there that could stop them." To his relief, her shoulders straightened a bit.

"Maybe you have a point." Her eyes were drawn to the Saronis Applications kiosk as they passed it, but there was no time for 'window shopping', as humans called it. "I don't know why he put Miranda in charge of us, though. I thought you were the new Kaidan."

Garrus flinched at that, though he knew she meant it as a compliment. The biotic lieutenant had usually served as the second fire team leader when the whole squad was on the ground, and he'd learned a few things from the man. Things that might have kept his team from bleeding out in an Omega slum if Kaidan had been the one implementing them... or perhaps not. He still wasn't sure. "Yeah, well... if I'm busy calling out targets, who'll make sure you don't throw up in your helmet and get killed?"

Tali shot him a glare that could have melted her visor, but he ignored it as they moved to catch up with the Cerberus operatives who began speaking to the tracking officer Liara had directed them to. The short description of justicars that had accompanied the information had piqued Garrus' interest. After all, traveling the galaxy righting wrongs and eliminating bad guys had been a dream career for a while. But Officer Dara's worries about the presence of a justicar left him wondering if they'd end up with another ticking time bomb just like the bald human, and Tali shot him a look of concern at the sight of his frown. It was one turian expression she seemed to have learned.

* * *

While she had faith in her abilities, Kasumi had doubts about the 'plan' she'd formulated. Passing as a cleaning crew, while improbable, was beginning to seem like a better idea than walking into the lobby of the high-rise openly carrying weapons beside a krogan and one of the most recognizable humans in the galaxy. The others remained out of sight of the glass doors while she approached the security panel outside, hidden by her cloak, murmuring to herself.

"Hmm... Fipsis JX-933 alarm panel... the good stuff. But... damn it." She sighed upon discovering the panel was a simple satellite, good for little other than temporarily suspending the alarm and opening the doors so the full-featured panel at the security desk could be reached. That was where the good stuff would be. "Shep?" she called over the comm.

_"Yeah?"_

"I had a feeling your luck only extended to winning firefights. We have to go inside to disable the system."

_"What's this 'we' crap? You're the invisible one."_

Kasumi smirked and shook her head as she began hacking the panel. "Why did I know you were going to say that. Sit tight, I've almost... got it."

The doors slid open and she jogged inside, spotting a yellow-armored asari rising from her seat behind the desk in the lobby, pulling a shotgun cautiously from behind her back. Rolling her eyes, Kasumi sprinted over in near silence and delivered a heavy chop on the back of the merc's neck as the cloaking field faded away, sending her slumping to the floor. A minute later, the doors opened again and she grinned when the rest of the team walked in. "You're welcome."

"I'll thank you when you find me a thirty-year old bottle of something from the highlands," Shepard replied with a smirk as he came up beside her and pulled up the floor plans, studying them beside the thief while the others formed a perimeter.

Kasumi scoffed. "Please, give me something difficult."

"Come up with an override to every bug on the ship so I can disable them at will," he murmured while he scanned through the plans, examining routes and the locations of guard posts.

"Is that why you came with us? To scheme behind the back of Cerberus?" Kasumi glanced away from her hacking to raise a curious brow at him.

"I'm not that devious... am I?" he replied deadpan.

"I'm not sure. I'll ask Tali." She smiled sweetly and pressed a final button. "There. Security's down."

He nodded and copied some of the data to his omni-tool. "Good. Let's get going."

* * *

The trail led them to Detective Anaya, a no-nonsense asari with quite a dilemma on her hands. It seemed that justicars, while virtually revered in asari society, were also capable of causing trouble on a scale that would impress even a krogan. Perhaps even Wrex.

"Your superiors want you to arrest a woman that'd make even a spectre pause? Suicide. Goddamn stupid. You've got a right to tell them to piss off," Zaeed said gruffly, drawing a stern gaze from Miranda and a look of amusement from Garrus.

"Do you think Shepard would let us disobey suicidal orders?"

Beside him, Tali sniffed back a returning trickle from her nose and shifted uncomfortably. "He'd probably send us away and take on the odds himself, the _bosh'tet._" Tali's sniffling, stuffy voice, and frequent glances toward the Dantius Towers hadn't escaped Miranda's notice, and she bit back a sigh while Jacob chuckled. Anaya rolled her eyes where she sat at her desk.

"Look, if you can convince her to join you, I'll buy you all a week's salary worth of drinks at Eternity. But you'd better get going. Justicars don't sit on their asses when there's righteous justice to unleash or whatever it is she's doing."

"Thank you, Detective. We'll be back shortly," Miranda said curtly, ending the conversation and nodding her head toward the door. The four members of her team followed without hesitation, to her relief, but Jacob and Zaeed were glancing back at their weapons as if they needed the reassurance.

* * *

"This is too easy," Grunt complained as they ascended a set of emergency stairs.

"Goddamnit, you just had to say that, didn't you?" Jack sighed. "You don't ever say 'this is too easy'. You screw yourself over that way."

Shepard and Kasumi traded a quick glance of amusement at the biotic wrecking ball's superstition but said nothing. Mordin stopped them with a harsh whisper of sound exhaled through his lips and pointed at the commander's ear. Taking the cue, they all listened carefully for a moment before frowns broke out. "Gunfire," Shepard muttered.

"I knew it," Jack growled, though her eyes lit up when she pulled her shotgun and Grunt cracked his knuckles eagerly.

"Good. This sneaking is no way for a warrior to behave!"

"Remind me to tell you about Mindoir and Elysium later, Grunt," Shepard said in passing as he pulled his rifle and led the way up the stairs two at a time. They were blocked by unfinished construction on the fifteenth floor and emerged into an open area of the building just in time to see a salarian sprinting past them while rounds streaked after him. Shepard and Kasumi leaned out of the stairwell, high and low, and opened fire on the three LOKI mechs they saw shooting, dropping them in seconds.

"Cleaning or construction crew. Mechs have Dantius logo. Killing her own people? Unforgivable!" It was the first time they'd seen Mordin angry, and the salarian hurried in the direction the other had fled. A blood trail made it easy to track him to an elevator where he sat slumped against the doors, wheezing from a sucking chest wound. Ignoring Grunt's expression of disapproval, Mordin began patching him up while Kasumi logged back into the security system to pull up video from other floors.

* * *

Garrus didn't know what it was about mercs, but they were the cockroaches of the Terminus, as one of his old squad had described them. Always underfoot, impossible to eliminate, endlessly irritating, and rewarding to crush beneath a boot. The Eclipse that had arrogantly blocked the route to the crime scene found themselves in that unenviable position following a quick ambush, and now the squad was staring at the voluptuous asari in tight armor that had one of her race by the neck beneath her heel. It was poetic, Garrus thought, and he watched while another cockroach was stepped on. The cool, unperturbed gaze the justicar gave them was not quite as pleasing.

"I am Samara, a servant of the justicar code. My quarrel is with these Eclipse sisters, but I see a well-armed group before me. Are you friend or foe?"

The smooth, even tone of her voice matched her eyes, giving the impression of an asari who had seen more than even most matriarchs. It was impressive and chilling at once, and Garrus noticed Tali's hands tensed on her shotgun beside him.

"Friend," Miranda answered. Though her calm was usually impressive, she seemed an anxious girl next to the blue-skinned woman when icy blue eyes settled on her.

"Yours is a cautious organization, but I am traveled enough to recognize the logo you wear. Cerberus is known for committing atrocities, and by the Code, I am compelled to end its members where I encounter them."

The even tone of her voice suddenly seemed far more dangerous than the squad of mercs they'd left bleeding out in the alley. Miranda shot a concerned glance at Garrus and he in turn looked at Tali, clearing his throat and stepping forward. "Well, you're noticing the turian and the quarian with them, right?"

"I am. Perhaps you will satisfy my curiosity before we do battle."

_Spirits, this woman means business. _Garrus suddenly found himself wishing he'd traded places with Shepard, but he squared his shoulders and gestured at Tali. "This is Tali'Zorah vas Neema. I'm Garrus Vakarian. We're-"

"You were part of the Normandy crew and helped bring Saren to justice." Garrus and Tali traded a look of surprise while the justicar continued. "It was a worthy goal and an impressive performance. But Commander Shepard and his crew put a stop to many Cerberus operations if what I heard was true."

"Um... we did," Tali spoke up. "But the Collectors are abducting human colonies and Shepard is using Cerberus resources to stop it."

Samara looked intrigued, the smooth skin of her brow lifting. "The Code permits investigation before battle. Please continue."

Tali shot a pleading look at Garrus, but the concealment of her visor gave him an excuse to shrug at her and gesture for her to continue. Her glare wasn't nearly as worrisome as the justicar's piercing gaze.

* * *

Shepard knew he should have put a bullet into Nassana Dantius when she'd first manipulated him into killing her sister. Politicians were bad enough, but to be used by one was a blow to the pride that he tried to keep in check. After what he'd heard from the wounded salarian they'd saved, he resolved to correct his mistake like he had when he'd encountered Rana Thanoptis on Korlus. The fact that the building was now swarming with mechs and Eclipse goons who'd slaughtered innocent salarians was all the justification he or Mordin needed to pull the trigger. Scowling, he slammed a levitated turian with a strong throw that detonated a blast of biotic energy and sent him flying while his colleagues were blasted into the walls of the corridor. Jack and Grunt whooped with delight, but he kept stalking forward beside Mordin. For a geneticist, even one who was a former STG member, the salarian was a marvelous shot with his heavy pistol and there was an evil little grin on the thin lips whenever he struck a merc with a blast of plasma from his omni-tool.

"This level cleared, Shepard. Stairs to the northwest."

Kasumi shook her head while she examined the holoprojection of the building from her omni-tool. "Those are under construction. We're stuck with the elevator."

"Good, it's faster," Jack said.

"There's no cover or fallback positions in an elevator," Grunt grumbled. Shepard felt the hint of a smile tug at his lips. The young krogan was learning.

"You remember what I said about cover before the colossus, Grunt." He jogged to the elevator while the krogan laughed at the memory.

" 'Fuck cover!' Impossible to forget, Shepard. But we should still get behind these... things."

Shepard chuckled and waved at them to do so before he hit the button and sprinted to the crates, hopping over them just in time. As soon as the elevator doors opened, a pair of asari mercs filled the air with rifle fire while a roaring krogan shimmered with biotic energy and emptied his shotgun into their cover. "Another damn battlemaster," Shepard grumbled while Kasumi overloaded one asari's shields and Grunt and Mordin opened up on the other.

Jack hit the advancing krogan with a warp field and reloaded her shotgun while rounds zipped over her bald head. "Charge him, Shepard!"

After the blows he'd taken from Garm and the colossus and the worry Tali would feel if he returned with bruises on his face again, he'd decided to be more cautious with getting in the faces of enemies that could strike with forces measuring in the thousands of newtons. He glanced at Jack, about to protest, but she was glaring at him. "Now, goddamn it!"

Putting his trust in Jack after what happened earlier didn't seem as if it would rank among his wisest decisions, but he jumped out of cover and charged the krogan just as it reached their crates with a glowing shotgun. The explosion of biotic energy was almost deafening, but when his eyes cleared from the blinding eruption of azure light, the krogan was skidding to a stop three meters away on the metal floor, growling. Grunt had leaped out of cover and slammed into a dazzled asari, picking her up off the floor and smashing her between the wall and his charging body. A loud crack signified the end of that threat, and a scream announced the demise of the other as Mordin's plasma consumed her. They all turned to the krogan, who was rising to his feet with a feral snarl on his wide face as he rushed toward Shepard, shotgun still glowing.

Jack raised her glowing arm and the spectre prepared to dodge, but Grunt bellowed loudly and slammed into the battlemaster at a full sprint. The force of the collision nearly bounced them apart, but both took a quick grip on the other's armor and roared, slamming their brow plates together. The noise and sight made Shepard grimace and raise his rifle, as Grunt's plate was still forming, but his crew member howled when his head came back from recoil and lowered his body. The younger krogan shoved the elder backward like a football player against a practice dummy and he ignored the slam of a shotgun atop his head that brought forth a small eruption of orange blood. The battlemaster struggled, but Grunt kept his balance long enough to push him to the edge of the unfinished floor. Noticing the deadly drop, the battlemaster roared and finally dug his heels in. Grunt only grinned wide and brought his head slamming down again while he kicked at the krogan's ankle and bashed his forearms against the ones that were holding onto his silver armor.

The battlemaster's loud roar slowly died away into silence as he fell into the depths of the tower while the others stared at Grunt, who yelled down into the abyss. "I AM KROGAN!"

"Hell yes, you are!" Jack started laughing, but Shepard eyed Grunt cautiously. Why the young tank-bred who had recommended cover had left it to engage a battlemaster in close combat was a question that suddenly worried him. The sight of blood trickling down between the developing sections of his brow plate didn't help matters.

"Come on, let's keep going. Mordin, slap some medi-gel on Grunt."

* * *

It had taken a minute of Garrus' omni-tool recording of the Horizon mission to convince Samara that not only were the Collectors real, but Shepard was indeed alive and in command of their mission. Still, they'd spent an uncomfortable minute in silence with their hands near their weapons while Samara gazed at them in contemplation of what the Code would demand. Tali wasn't sure why she was so relieved when the justicar announced that fighting a greater, more pressing evil took precedence. Perhaps it was the absence of their two wrecking ball biotics or the endless confidence Samara seemed to display. She stood in stark contrast to Liara, who had joined the crew as a nervous and inexperienced maiden. Perhaps that meant the new asari wouldn't be inclined to embrace eternity with her boyfriend. The thought made her snicker, a sound that turned into a cough when Samara glanced her way during her explanation of her mission. They'd returned to the precinct where Anaya looked just as nervous as Garrus had, and it seemed Shepard was right: these recruitments were never easy.

"So... you want us to break into Eclipse's local stronghold to get you the name of the ship your fugitive left on? I should have known." Tali sighed and sniffled. While the others were breaking into another fortified Eclipse position, they'd get to do the same. Somehow, she wasn't surprised.

"Yes."

At least Samara's explanations were succinct, even if her Code sounded as dangerous as a krogan with a wrench in the drive core. Sure, because it made sense that the justicar was obligated to surrender herself for one day at the maximum before she started killing her way out of captivity after a good sleep. Garrus glanced over at Miranda and they traded a frown. "Can we wait for Shepard to finish?"

The XO took a moment too long to come to a decision and Samara answered the question. "Time is of the essence. Until I have a lead on the fugitive I pursue, the Code will not be satisfied."

"And you'll have to bust your way out of jail... and through anyone in your way. That about right?" Zaeed looked amused, but Samara's reply was as solemn and unperturbed as ever, to Anaya's discomforted shifting.

"Correct."

The mercenary shrugged. "I've got plenty of thermal clips left and we don't need Shepard to babysit us. I've been doing this a lot longer than he has." His scarred face lit up in a grin.

Garrus shrugged at Miranda, who nodded. "True. None of us are amateurs, after all."

"Well, unless you're comparing yourselves to a a justicar with hundreds of years of experience," Anaya added just to twist the knife a little. The sooner their pride got them on their way, the sooner they'd (hopefully) finish their mission and get the justicar out of her precinct. Miranda gave her a glare, but Zaeed laughed.

"And here I've always hated cops. You're changing my mind, love. Come on, let's go. Sooner we finish, sooner we can meet the detective at that bar." Zaeed headed toward the exit with Miranda while Jacob glanced over his shoulder at Tali and Garrus, rolling his eyes. Anaya, however, was grinning.

"Have fun."

* * *

Since their frequent trips to the Citadel while pursuing Saren, Shepard had come to hate elevators, and this one was no exception. It was an order of magnitude faster than the Citadel's, and it had given him time for Miranda to fill him in on their activities, but he expected Grunt at any moment to start an argument with Mordin about the genophage or Jack with Kasumi about her perfume. Fortunately, the elevator reached the transit level without incident, doors opening to admit them to another half-finished floor. It chimed pleasantly to announce their arrival. A squad of mechs and Eclipse troopers made far more ominous noises as they unfolded and drew weapons.

"Fuck!" Jack swore, instinctively raising her hands to put up a wall of biotic energy. It began shimmering furiously as eight weapons opened up and to Shepard's surprise, it held until their foes were reloading. Jack had bit her lip hard enough to draw blood while she focused and at that moment, the scowl on her stained lips was exactly what he wanted to see.

"Shockwave the right side. I've got left," he said quietly while he put his Mattock away.

She gave him a skeptical look, and Kasumi and Mordin made surprised sounds, but Shepard signaled Jack and the barrier dropped a split second before she fired off a powerful shockwave at the right side of a pillar where half their foes were in a miniature firing line. The nimble asari leaped out of the way but the two clumsy LOKI mechs went flying. So did the turian that Shepard charged into, and as soon as he came out of it he grabbed a LOKI and yanked it around in front of him, using it as an inhuman shield. As the mech began sparking and howling electronically from bullet impacts, the spectre found himself snickering while Mordin, Kasumi, and Grunt began firing. A mech and an asari fell quickly, but the remaining turian and asari dashed behind the pillar close to Shepard and took aim at him. They were too slow.

He launched the battered mech into the asari with a biotic throw, collapsing her barriers and making her stumble while he dashed at the turian. His rifle was chattering furiously, but his barriers absorbed the impact until he was close enough to bash the rifle's muzzle aside with a fist and slam the other into a mandible. The turian was stunned, but to his credit he recovered quickly. Unfortunately for him, it was just in time to realize the human had yanked him around and had him at the edge of a long dropoff. Dark green eyes went wide as an armored boot rose and slammed into his chest. Grunt howled with laughter while the turian went flying.

"That was cold, Shep," Kasumi remarked while she reloaded her Locust.

He shot a smirk at Jack and shrugged his shoulders. "He shouldn't have fired at me. Let's get going."

As he drew his rifle and led the way toward an exit, he saw the hint of a grin play across Jack's lips while Grunt still chuckled.

* * *

Zaeed was an intimidating figure even when he was simply standing motionless. And so a local volus who did business with Eclipse was utterly terrified at the scowl on the scarred face and the wicked, recurved knife that had scraped along his pressure suit.

"I can't believe we actually found a faster way up there than having me hack the controls," Tali commented before sniffling while they ascended in the elevator. Pitne For, the unfortunate merchant, had been quick to give up the access codes under Zaeed's persuasion. The scarred merc grinned at Jacob, but the Cerberus lieutenant was staring silently at the elevator doors.

"Even guns for hire know a trick or two."

"Just keep that knife away from my suit." Zaeed laughed while Tali folded her arms and leaned against the elevator wall, slumping slightly. Garrus looked at her curiously, but she waved him off.

"Yeah, I don't need a pissed-off spectre breaking down my door in a rage. Be fun to watch, though."

Tali blinked a few times and squinted at the merc while Miranda shot him a glare as well. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Obvious, isn't it? Shepard practically stitches Garrus' neck up himself while it's gushing blood all over the floor and then he tears through a company of geth to get to you." Zaeed chuckled and checked his rifle's clip. "Got a soft spot for his old crew, I think."

"...Oh." Tali shot a glance at Garrus and saw his mandibles twitching amusedly. Before either could say anything, the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened to the sound of mechs unfolding. Jacob and Zaeed gunned them down quickly, shaking their heads.

"Can't believe people use these pieces of crap," Jacob said.

"Yeah, we never came across any while we were chasing Saren. The quality of mercs in the galaxy has really gone to hell," Garrus observed with theatrical disappointment while they all stepped off the elevator, chuckling. Tali took the rear, her step faltering for a brief moment before she gritted her teeth and clutched her shotgun tighter. When Miranda cued the door dozens of rounds came pouring through the opening, sending them all back into cover.

"That more like it?" Zaeed asked sarcastically, leaning out to fire off two bursts from his rifle.

"Perfect," Garrus breathed as he sighted on an asari head and pulled the trigger.

* * *

Shepard didn't have a list of rules he made his crew memorize, but there were certain universal truths he'd come to accept. One was that clever and small beat stupid and large. Another was that brunettes were always more attractive than blondes. He was adding another to the list at that moment: mercs were utterly stupid.

"I've got nothing more to say to you. My-"

Shepard took a step back and delivered another slam of his boot. The Eclipse merc that had stubbornly refused to answer questions despite the proximity of a very long drop shattered the large glass window as he went flying, screaming while he plunged toward the ground five hundred meters below. Stepping to the edge, the spectre watched while Grunt ran up to do the same.

"How about 'goodbye'?" Kasumi spoke up before giggling. Shepard turned and raised a brow curiously and the thief stared at him hopelessly. "You know? Nothing more to say... oh, forget it."

"Would've made the perfect one-liner," Jack admitted while they set off toward the exit to open air.

"I'll do better next time," he said dryly as they stepped out into the wind beneath the stars. A quarter of the way around the tower would be the long bridge that led to tower one, and their objective. Crossing it would be the interesting part, now that every merc in the building seemed to be on alert for the assassin. The fact that they were even aware of his presence made Shepard wonder if the drell would live up to his reputation. He pushed the thought aside while he replaced his Mattock with the scoped Mantis and leaned around cover to put a heavy round through a human merc's throat.

* * *

Garrus was forced to retract his statement after they finished off the first dozen Eclipse mercs. The asari and turian troops weren't bad for being little more than gang members, especially the infuriating biotics. Still, Miranda and Jacob made quick work of their barriers with their own dark energy attacks while Zaeed gunned them down and Garrus took care of the ones in cover with his armor-piercing sniper rounds. Tali, however, had stopped firing her shotgun and let her drone flush out their foes while she struggled to focus her unsteady vision and stop her swaying. While Jacob reloaded his shotgun he glanced back and saw her shaking her head while she leaned heavily against a wall.

"Whoa... you okay? You look dizzy."

"No, I'm-"

"Dizzy." Garrus interrupted while Miranda frowned back at them.

"...Yes. That." Tali sighed at the admission and activated her omni-tool, taking a quick scan of herself. A moment later she sighed heavily and cursed. "_Bosh'tet!"_

* * *

Narrow choke points with environmental hazards were something infantrymen loved... when they were defending. Offense was an entirely different story, and Shepard cursed when he missed his second shot due to the heavy wind. He ducked back behind cover and replaced his long rifle with his Mattock, frowning at Kasumi and Mordin. "Can you two work faster on your tech? I need their heads kept down long enough for Grunt to move up."

"I can move up now! Use me as cover" Grunt interjected, but Shepard shook his head.

"Even you can't regenerate your way out of a round in the eye, Grunt. Last resort only."

The krogan frowned but nodded his head while Kasumi frowned at her omni-tool. "I can work a little faster, but not by much. What about you, Mordin?"

They turned to the salarian while Grunt and Jack kept firing their shotguns, but he seemed distracted, listening intently to his earpiece through the howling wind. "Something wrong?"

"Inner ear infection. Problematic."

The humans traded glances. "Uh... you seem fine," Kasumi said.

"Not me. Tali'Zorah. Affecting equilibrium. One moment." Mordin pulled up his omni-tool while Shepard clenched his jaw.

"Good thing she's not five hundred meters up with us, then." Jack yelled, laughing and leaning back out to launch a shockwave at a pair of approaching mercs. Shepard glared at her back before turning to Mordin, mouth opening. A long salarian finger extended skyward, cutting him off. Sighing, he rubbed at his jaw and glanced over at Kasumi who seemed to be biting back a smile.

"What?"

"Hm? Nothing. Why?"

"Hmmmmmm." Mordin's long, contemplative hum stole their attention but he was still engrossed in his omni-tool. After a moment, he smiled. "Ah, yes. Turian virus, equivalent of common cold. Garrus likely carrier."

That got Jack and Kasumi's attention, but the thief was the first to speak up. "Wait, are you saying Tali and Garrus..."

The glare Shepard gave her shut her up while Mordin shook his head. "No, no. Likely surface contamination on..." The glare switched targets, and the salarian hesitated only a moment. "...medbay. Will have to examine quarantine equipment." Turning to Shepard, Mordin frowned. "Treatable with her suit medications, but symptoms will persist for some hours. Tali'Zorah is combat ineffective."

"Damn it," Shepard cursed. Surface contamination indeed. Apparently Tali's suit had picked up some guests where it lay on the couch overnight despite his cleaning. "You all keep them pinned down while I figure this out." While the firefight raged on the bridge, he knelt behind cover and opened up comms to Miranda's team.

* * *

Jacob and Zaeed kept watch while Garrus looked after Tali and watched Miranda pace with a frown on her lips. It was a strange feeling, to be left out of an important conversation while a _Cerberus _operative was in charge. Garrus bit back a scowl and shook his head, returning his attention to Tali just as Miranda finally spoke.

"Yes, I'm sure Garrus would volunteer to stay with her, but we might need his tech skills. He's better at electronics than I am." Whatever Shepard said deepened Miranda's frown and made her shake her head slightly. "Fine... yes, Commander. …..No, we can handle it, but I wouldn't object to backup."

He smirked at that and whispered to Tali. "In other words, 'Get your ass over here and keep me from getting into another situation like on Horizon'."

Tali's eyes seemed to struggle in their attempt to focus on him where she sat slumped back against the wall. "What happened on Horizon?"

"Well, she-"

"Garrus, you stay with Tali. Bunker down or try to exfiltrate. Shepard said it's your call."

Miranda delivered the news calmly, but the touch of irritation in her voice and her curled fingers didn't go unnoticed. Tali started to protest, but Garrus set a hand firmly on her shoulder and nodded. "Got it. Miranda nodded curtly and drew her submachine gun, moving to lead the way while Jacob and Zaeed fell in beside her. A moment later, he was alone with a dizzy quarian who couldn't walk without stumbling into a wall and who couldn't shoot without missing by two meters. He resisted the urge to sigh, but Tali had no such reservations. Exhaling heavily, she stared down at her entwined and unmoving fingers resting on her lap.

"I should have known better. I can't believe I was so stupid."

"No kidding. _Sick_ people hang out in medbays. They're deathtraps for quarians." Garrus gave her his best grin, even if she had trouble reading it. But she wasn't even looking at him, instead shaking her head despondently.

"You know what I mean."

"I do? ….Ah. Maybe I do." Garrus slid an arm around her ribs and lifted her to her feet before reaching across her to pluck her pistol from her belt to keep in his free hand while he led her back the way they came. Her metal boots mostly slid along the smooth floor instead of stepping, but fortunately she wasn't very heavy to his strong turian arm. "All right, it _was_ stupid. You should have stayed on the ship."

"That's not what I meant!" she hissed while she struggled to tap the proper command on her omni-tool. After three tries, Chiktikka sprang to life and floated along beside them protectively.

"You're not going to give me the whole quarian selflessness speech now, are you? Really, I got enough of that two years ago."

His teasing didn't do the trick either, but Tali stopped arguing and instead glared at him while they moved along the corridors.

* * *

Using his charge had been deemed too risky with the high winds and the asari biotics that were no doubt ready to slam him sideways at the first drop of his barriers. Still, Shepard was tempted while he ripped a turian's chest open with three rounds from his Mattock. They were making progress across the bridge, but it was slow going. Slow enough to give him time to berate himself for making another decision with his heart instead of his head. Tali should have stayed aboard the Normandy. As he reloaded his rifle he failed to notice his shoulder and arm were out of cover until his shields shattered, surprising him. He ducked back behind cover just in time to avoid a burst of fire while Mordin frowned at him, leaning in close.

"Need to concentrate. Finish the job and join the others faster that way."

He stepped away to fire off a ball of plasma just as quickly as he'd come up, and Shepard nodded. Mordin epitomized proper, rational decision-making and was the right example to follow. Of course, he'd never been one for plodding rational action in the middle of combat. Stepping out of cover, he charged off in a streak of azure and slammed into an asari that had been aiming a rocket launcher. He grabbed the weapon as she bounced hard off her cover and turned it on the two mercs five meters to his side, watching their eyes go wide as he pulled the trigger.

Twenty meters behind, the others stared when the Eclipse troopers were launched off the side of the bridge in a shower of blood and twirling viscera. Following his commander's example, Grunt roared and hefted his shotgun to charge while the others provided cover fire.

* * *

Getting carried out of the Council Tower in Wrex's arms following the confrontation with Saren had been embarrassing enough, even if she was grateful. But shuffling along under Garrus' arm while her equilibrium kept shifting was worse. The dumb _bosh'tet_ probably wanted to crack a joke about how she got sick, but his face was unreadable with her dizzy vision. She wasn't aware that he was frowning and clutching tightly to the pistol in his hand as they passed by the corpses they'd left bleeding out during their infiltration. With Tali useless and him being reduced to a mere pistol, Garrus dreaded suddenly running across reinforcements.

He wasn't at all surprised to see a half dozen asari Eclipse rush into the cargo bay fifty meters away, but he cursed loudly and dumped Tali down behind cover at the landing between two sets of stairs. Rounds began impacting their cover and zipping overhead against the door they'd exited as soon as he ducked down beside Tali, and he cursed again. "What is it with our luck?" he grumbled, handing her the pistol back and pulling his Mantis. "Send out that stupid little drone of yours."

"Chiktikka is not stupid," Tali protested, but she was having trouble focusing on her omni-tool and the drone just floated beside her head. Garrus scowled and risked a peek, finding the mercs advancing proficiently under cover fire.

"Figures. We get the only mercs in this city who know what they're doing." Giving his shields a momentary boost, Garrus popped out of cover and fired at a shotgun-wielding biotic who was advancing. He had the satisfaction of watching her head erupt into a gout of purple blood before he dropped back down with drained shields. "Got one."

"How many are left?" Tali inquired, squinting fiercely. She finally got it right, and the drone floated out and over a merc in cover, zapping her and making her shriek. The drone was shot down by the others almost immediately.

"Five. And they're all asari." Garrus growled and reloaded, leaning out of cover again only to have his shields immediately shattered. His head found cover just in time to escape a burst. "Bastards."

Tali was quiet and tense while his shields recharged. When they were up, she grabbed at his arm, barely catching it. "I can rig up a tech mine and attach it to Chiktikka if you distract them from shooting at her."

Garrus stared down at the unfocused silver eyes behind the purple visor for a moment. To her surprise, he just barked out an abrupt laugh. "You want me to be a distraction? Your plans are worse than Shepard's. Sit tight." He keyed his omni-tool. "Miranda? Garrus. We're pinned down by reinforcements and we could really use some help."

When Garrus' mandibles suddenly twitched and his expression turned into what looked like a grimace, Tali's heart sank.

* * *

Miranda had stuck to her professionalism and didn't vent her irritation to her two remaining squadmates, though she was sorely tempted. She had confidence in their ability to finish the job: there was no doubting her own abilities, and Jacob was quite capable in his understated way. Zaeed had no doubt survived some truly harrowing situations, judging by the scars on his face, and the man never displayed an ounce of fear. He did, however, scowl deeply when a gunship suddenly rose into view outside the docking bay they were passing through. They barely made it behind cover when its cannon opened up in a roar, spraying rounds across their cover with blinding sparks. Zaeed and Jacob leaned out and opened up with their weapons and biotics while her comm beeped at her and Garrus' voice came through with unusual tension.

_"Miranda? Garrus. We're pinned down by reinforcements and we could really use some help."_

"Join the club, Garrus! We just ran into a gunship and we can't just shoot our way through its cockpit!" Miranda wanted to swear hard enough to put Zaeed and Jack to shame. When they got out of this, she and Shepard were going to have a very long conversation. A shot from the gunship skipped off her cover and splashed her cheek with a few drops of molten metal, making her hiss. _If_ they got out of this.

* * *

By the time they reached the final door that led to Nassana's office Grunt's armor was splattered with four shades of blood, including much of his own. Shepard and the others were in better shape, though an asari's warp had breached his barriers and reduced one of his pauldrons to the consistency of plastic. He grimaced and ripped it off while Kasumi put the finishing touches on her hack. The double doors slid open to reveal a trio of Eclipse mercs flanking an asari in a dress worth as much as his squad's weaponry. Confronted by five fighters that had taken out half her guard force, Nassana Dantius just scowled and stood behind her desk, an image of proud defiance.

"Shepard. I heard you were dead. Did you come back to finish the job?"

He was in no mood for dealing with the traitorous bitch but he stayed his hand. She was the bait for the assassin... if he would even show with eight armed individuals in the room. Perhaps he would resort to explosives and kill them all? The plan suddenly felt like a giant failure and in the meantime, his other squad was left divided and Tali was ill. The scowl that curled his lips removed the smirk from Nassana's face and she glanced nervously to her bodyguards who kept their weapons low.

"Don't flatter yourself, Nassana. I forgot you were even alive."

"Let's just shoot them," Jack whispered while Grunt nodded his agreement, but Shepard shook his head as Nassana's smirk returned. She folded her arms imperiously.

"So you tore up my tower... why? Robbery? You want credits? Fine. I have plenty to go around, if it'll let me get back to work." She reached for a datapad while her guards suddenly looked around suspiciously at a curious metallic sound. Shepard glanced at Mordin and saw him smirking faintly. Salarian hearing wasn't quite as strong as human's, but it was more sophisticated. Apparently he understood the source of the noise and he lowered his weapon to watch.

Shepard turned back just in time to see a shape drop out of a vent in the ceiling. In three seconds, the lithe drell had snapped one neck, chopped another in the throat, shot the third, and slipped close enough to Nassana to push her pistol out wide while he rammed his own into her sternum. She gaped and stared into his black eyes, her haughty demeanor gone, faded into a plea for her life. The shot that rang out was muffled and her eyes went wide before the drell gently lowered her onto her desk and folded her arms over her chest as she faded away.

"Impressive," Mordin remarked with satisfaction while he put away his pistol. Kasumi did the same, though Grunt and Jack clung uncertainly to their shotguns. Shepard waved them down and stepped toward the drell, but the assassin clasped his hands and bowed his head. Was he... praying? For Nassana Dantius? He would have snickered but for the time constraints he was under.

"Thane Krios? I need your help."

"One moment. Prayers for the wicked must not be forsaken."

A cool customer. He stood in contrast to Shepard, who felt the old familiar impatience while he stared at the drell. "Don't bother. She was a monster."

Thane raised his head and shook it slightly. "Not for her. For me."

That raised his eyebrows, but he missed what Thane said next while Garrus's voice came over his comm, nearly drowned out by the sound of gunfire. _"Shepard! We need your help over here, __**now**__!"_

Thane's voice trailed off while everyone turned to see the grim expression on Shepard's face.

* * *

Joker had been cruising idly in circles over Nos Astra at twenty thousand meters chewing a chocolate bar when Garrus' tense voice came over the general comm. "Shit, I knew it!" He tossed the candy aside and disengaged the autopilot and was diving down toward Dantius Towers inside of five seconds. Why did everything always go to hell? He muttered a litany of curses while he listened to the teams over the general comm. Tali and Garrus pinned down, Miranda's team pinned down, and Shepard's team two kilometers away.

_"We're heading for the roof! Joker, land on tower one!"_

"Yeah, I'm already on my way." He didn't bother asking if he was clear to land, but given the chaos taking place, he probably should have. As luck would have it, nothing shot at him when he came to a low hover over the landing pad atop tower one. Shepard and the others leaped aboard as soon as the shuttle came to a stop, including what must have been their newest recruit.

"Get going, Joker!"

Jeff was already lifting off and slamming the thrusters to maximum, leaving the squad to stumble or fall clumsily into their seats. All except the drell, who simply lowered his stance and took a quick step to remain in perfect balance. Another dangerous alien, it seemed. Good.

* * *

_"We're on our way. ETA, two minutes."_

It wasn't much of a relief. Garrus had been unable to get a good shot on any more mercs, leaving him with five asari to deal with. And they were close to the single flight of stairs on either side. One simple rush and it was over. Tali kept firing her shotgun blindly over the railing at the position of two of them while Garrus tossed the last of his grenades down the other side. Predictably, it went flying away from the mercs' position from a blast of biotic energy, but it gave him time to finish fastening Tali's tech mine to her drone. Desperate measures, he though, grimacing while he worked. They just needed to clear out one route off the stairs and they could find cover.

"I'm out." Tali's voice was eerily quiet while she dropped her shotgun and pulled her pistol, which wasn't much of a deterrence to a pair of armored biotics. Garrus cursed and ripped his pouch of thermal clips from his waist, tossing it toward Tali while he put the finishing touches on their improvised explosive delivery system. But he was too late. He turned to see the two mercs coming into view on Tali's side of the landing, shimmering with biotic barriers and taking aim.

An explosion of blinding azure light made him flinch. He was vaguely aware of Tali's startled yelp, but didn't feel any pain, to his confusion. When he blinked his eyes open, he saw the two mercs slumped against the door and heard shouts from down his set of stairs. The biotic explosion left his head ringing and poor Tali was simply lying on the deck, groaning with a lolling head while shouts, weapons fire, and the sound of biotics came from down behind their meager cover. It came to a stop and he carefully lifted his head, sighting his Vindicator down the stairs. He blinked and opened fire on the Eclipse merc that was sprinting up toward him but his shots bounced off a powerful biotic barrier. _Oh, spirits._ He leaped to his feet and raised his rifle to slam it down, but the merc held up her empty hands.

"Relax, Garrus!"

Only then did he take a closer look at the asari face, blinking hard.

* * *

The grip of Shepard's Mattock was creaking ominously as they approached the Eclipse headquarters. The gunship was still firing into the docking bay Miranda, Jacob, and Zaeed were taking cover in, but it was also dodging from side to side as biotic attacks struck and flew past it. They were holding their own, but the pilot was good. He turned to Joker. "Drop me off in the other bay, then take the others to help Mir-"

_"Shepard, it's Garrus. We're, ah, fine here. Go help out Miranda."_

That turned some heads and the spectre frowned in confusion. "What do you mean you're-"

_"Just do it, Shepard. Iota five."_

Shepard finally cracked a smile when he heard the all-clear signal instead of the duress code and nodded. "All right. You heard him, Joker."

Joker turned to grin at his commander. "Aye aye." He turned the shuttle toward the gunship that was firing rockets into the docking bay.

* * *

Miranda had been muttering to herself repeatedly while they alternated between firing and taking cover from the gunship, but Jacob hadn't been able to make it out. Whatever was on her mind, it didn't seem to affect her performance. At one point when the gunship had been making a pass through the docking bay, coming close to drawing a bead on him while he ran for better cover, she'd enacted a barrier and drew fire by launching a trio of warp attacks in quick succession at the gunship. She might have saved his life, but at the cost of stumbling with exhaustion and getting a round through her thigh when she tried to scramble behind cover. Zaeed had made it to her side quickly and made her shriek in agony with the tube of medi-gel he shoved into the wound, but the heavy bleeding quickly slowed. But it gave the gunship time to sideslip around behind them, and Jacob shouted a warning. They looked up with shock, but they weren't looking at the gunship. A sudden blast of heat and a deafening roar made Jacob drop to the deck and cover his head with a curse.

When he looked up, what he saw what had streaked over head and his jaw dropped. A black Kodiak shuttle was shooting toward the Mantis gunship and it started sideslipping again but to no avail. The shuttle unerringly reached it, rising suddenly to ram into its underbelly with a boom and a screech of scraping metal. Zaeed began laughing uproariously while they all watched the clumsy combat of the two lumbering vehicles. The gunship managed to lift away from the shuttle and slip backward to bring its guns to bear, but its rockets streaked harmlessly through empty air when the Kodiak dropped like a rock out of sight.

"Shepard was right. He's a damn good pilot," Miranda admitted through clenched teeth while Zaeed resumed working on her leg. The gunship cautiously backed off, but all three laughed when they saw the Kodiak rising from behind it. Apparently Joker had wiggled the shuttle through the much smaller cargo bay beneath and now looked poised to poke the predator in the ass. Accelerating quickly, the Kodiak shot toward the Mantis as it began to turn. There was a loud boom when the shuttle struck the tail of the gunship, the sound of rending metal, and a shower of sparks as the tail ripped off. The Mantis quickly fell into a nose-up attitude and its thrusters sent it flying back toward the far wall of the hangar. The detonation of its crushed fuel cells exploded the vehicle like a popped balloon and Jacob found himself laughing along with Zaeed.

A few moments later the shuttle set down and the hatch opened. Shepard pointed at Miranda before he sprinted off in the direction of the cargo bay alongside Kasumi. Mordin quickly made his way to his wounded patient and Jacob shook his head slowly, catching his breath. Each mission seemed to be crazier than the last, but they kept working out. While he walked over to Mordin's side to assist, he wondered if their luck would hold.

* * *

When the door to the cargo bay opened, Shepard's eyes went wide with surprise at the sight of an asari in Eclipse armor sitting on a crate talking with his friends. Garrus was sitting against a low wall on the landing overlooking the cargo bay beside Tali who was... giggling? What in the hell?

"Shepard, glad you could make it!" Garrus remarked cheerfully. Tali's eyes seemed to brighten behind her visor, but her head was lolling slightly and her gaze appeared unsteady. That concerned him, but not as much as the merc beside his friends. "Meet our savior." He gestured toward the asari, who paused before turning. The somewhat shy smile on her lips made him crack a grin.

"Liara? What...?"

"I'm a very good information broker, Shepard." She shrugged modestly, but there was a hint of pride in her sapphire eyes. "I was following your missions. You're still using the same encryption key on your comms, you know. Detective Anaya wasn't aware that this base was at nearly double its usual complement while replacements are waiting to go to Omega."

Shepard walked over to kneel beside Tali, setting a hand on her shoulder. It was hard to tell if she was smiling with her apparent dizziness, but she reached up and squeezed his fingers reassuringly. That eased the last vestiges of concern that had a grip around his heart for the last half-hour and he gave her a smile. "So you just decided to sneak in to give us a hand?"

Liara hesitated for a moment and then shrugged. "I couldn't just sit there in my office while the three of you were taking on an army of mercenaries."

"And you decided that Garrus and Tali needed your help more than Shepard? I'm insulted." The turian folded his arms indignantly and received a smirk from his old friend.

"If you preferred that I had gone to the Dantius Towers-"

"No! He's just being a _bosh'tet._ Ignore him." Tali let her head drop onto Shepard's shoulder, but her pillow slipped away when Jacob approached.

"Shepard, Mordin's taking Miranda back to the Normandy in one of the Eclipse cars and he wants Tali back there, too. We've still got to find that info for the justicar, though."

Rising, the commander nodded and looked to Liara. "Can you and Garrus get her back?"

Liara and Garrus both looked between Tali and Shepard and the indecision was obvious. He settled the matter quickly. "Garrus, you're with me." He gave Tali a brief smile and turned, but paused to glance back over his shoulder and give Liara a wry grin. "Liara? Thanks. And... lose the armor."

She rolled her eyes but smiled wide as the three men walked off.

* * *

Convincing Thane to join them had taken less time than he'd expected but more than he'd wanted as he'd fought to restrain his impatience. Fortunately, the assassin was familiar with the Collectors... and had a conscience. He'd volunteered to accompany them free of charge and had quickly followed them to the landing pad upon receiving the news that some of his new crew mates were in trouble. Now he moved silently beside Shepard at the head of their squad as they made their way deeper into the Eclipse base. With most of the squad remaining in the field, the two small teams of mercenaries they encountered were dispatched quickly. Thane proved himself to be an adept hand with a sniper rifle, trading nods of appreciation with Garrus. Their precise fire frustrated Grunt, but Shepard was grateful for the relative ease of their progression. As were Jacob and Jack, it seemed, as the two biotics frequently took sips from their armors' reservoirs of the nutrient drink. Mordin had even promised to improve the taste. The commander hoped he waited to work on that until after the varren scale itch had been eliminated from the ship.

Reaching the door that led to a cargo processing area, the squad stacked up and waited for Shepard. He couldn't help but smile at the relative smoothness at which they moved together. Jack, Kasumi, and Thane had no formal infantry training but they were quick studies despite also being the solitary types. Keying the door, he led the way in to reveal a rather large room filled with crates of various sizes and a desk across the way, behind which another asari mercenary took a sip from a glass and gazed their way. She looked surprised. Perhaps she hadn't expected to see eight instead of them. She gestured to her sides and more mercenaries took up positions, but they didn't appear to have the advantage of numbers. Shepard lowered his rifle.

"I've already cleared out Dantius towers and my trigger finger is getting tired. Just give us the name of the ship you smuggled the fugitive out on."

"I heard about that." The mercenary captain almost hid her unease behind the same confident smile Nassana had tried to wear. She didn't do it very well. "It's impressive. But our boss isn't very forgiving... not to mention generous in her bounties. You're at the top of the list, Shepard."

"I'm flattered." He returned her smile, then charged her. The rest of his squad opened up immediately.

The word 'massacre' came to mind when Shepard glanced around the battlefield ten seconds later, his hand wrapped around the captain's throat where she lay struggling for breath on the ground. He knelt astride her thighs and pinned her good wrist to the floor. The other arm was broken and useless. "Now... the name of the ship?" He relaxed his grip slightly.

"De... Demeter!" she gasped, coughing and pulling down a lungful of breath. "The AML Demeter!"

"Thank you," he said politely before pulling his pistol and shooting her through the heart. Her eyes went wide but they glazed over quickly. Rising, Shepard put away his pistol and turned to see Jacob and Kasumi frowning.

"Was that really necessary, Commander?" Jacob voiced the question for both of them. Shepard picked up the datapad the captain had been reading, reviewing the information.

"No. But it was prudent. Kasumi, see if you can hack their security and erase their logs. No sense in giving Eclipse any info they don't need or having them warn the justicar's fugitive. Garrus, you know the drill."

The turian chuckled. "On it." He moved to start gathering thermal clips and any interesting weapon mods the mercs had. Old habits died hard, and were often profitable. Kasumi and Jacob shared another look of distaste but moved to carry out their tasks. Grunt picked up the asari captain's drink and sniffed at it before dumping it into his maw, earning a chuckle from the commander. Another day's bloody labors were finished. He took some solace in that, despite Tali's infection and Miranda's wound. He'd see both of them as soon as their business in Nos Astra was finished.

"So what's Samara like?" he asked no one in particular.

Jacob, Zaeed, and Garrus traded glances and the first two quickly returned to their scavenging, leaving the turian holding the bag. He sighed and turned to Shepard. "Well, she only refrained from killing us all because the Collectors are a greater evil than Cerberus." Shepard glanced up from the datapad with raised brows. Garrus shrugged. "Short version? She's like you, but I don't think she smiles."

Shepard pondered that a moment before he shook his head and returned to his reading. "Better keep her away from Jack."

"Fuck you too, Shepard."

The squad shared a laugh.

* * *

**Author's note****:**

_(Yes, again. I like explaining my thought processes.)__Trying to make Joker more than just the guy who sits in the cockpit all the time and makes jokes. Honestly, I wouldn't mind giving the same treatment to Chakwas, Kelly, Ken, Gabby, Anderson... but this thing would drag on forever if I added every little thing I'm tempted to. Joker, though, deserves some credit. He cut a 100 meter requirement for a Mako drop down to what, 20? He is a god.  
_

_It was nice writing Kasumi as more than a friendly face or a source of humor. I like her interactions with Shepard and Garrus. I don't view Jacob as boring. I just see him as Mister Dependable, the one you come to take for granted.  
_

_Adding Liara was a last-minute thought that popped into my head yesterday, and it seemed to fit my version of her. Still torn between her mission and her friendships, but willing to let her heart lead from time to time. Which gets Shepard into trouble, but not her... he might complain about that later. Also, cue the awkward drive between her and Tali.  
_

_All in all, not sure how well I did on this one. Satisfied with it and enjoyed writing it, though. It was an interesting challenge writing simultaneous missions and throwing a wrench into the works.  
_


	24. Vicious maneating crates

**Author's note:**

_Sorry for the long hiatus. Just needed to indulge the reader side of me for a while. Feels good to be working on this again, along with a couple of other stories.  
Ah, Samara and Thane. They may pose a challenge to write.  
I've been thinking about rewriting the first couple of chapters. They feel rather rough when I read them months after the fact. Thoughts?_

* * *

Miranda's ride with a chatty salarian surely couldn't be nearly as uncomfortable as one with a quiet asari, Tali decided. Despite her attempts to appear fascinated by Nos Astra's skyline she felt Liara's eyes flicking in her direction repeatedly. It was unfortunate that her vision couldn't focus properly, which made sightseeing a weak excuse for her silence. Sighing, Tali closed her eyes and lay her head back on the headrest. "Either say it or stop looking at me." She felt a twinge of regret at her own rudeness, but between Liara's actions – or lack thereof – while Shepard was in a Cerberus lab and her irritated inner ears, she decided not to fret over it.

"Say what?"

"Fine. Stop looking at me."

Liara sighed and stared straight ahead, navigating the car between a set of skyscrapers. She thought she was finished with awkward car rides when she'd stopped visiting her mother after graduating from the University of Serrice. At that moment she would have gladly returned to those trips. The ones when her mother was still her mother and not a puppet for Sovereign and Saren. A hint of a smile curled her lips when she recalled her mother's teasing about her nonexistent social life, but it faded when Tali's came to mind. She sighed.

"Keelah, just say it already!"

Liara frowned and glanced over at what had been a close friend while her patience hit the breaking point. "Just what is it you expect me to say? Do you think I'm somehow pleased that you were nearly killed? Goddess, Tali, what kind of monster do you think I am?"

"After you gave Shepard to Cerberus, I'm not sure," Tali muttered, once again ignoring the twinge of guilt. Liara's eyes flared but she bit back her anger and responded coolly.

"If your dripping nose and dizziness are any indication, you're happily reaping the benefits of having him back."

All thoughts of guilt fled from Tali's mind when she heard the tone of Liara's voice and she smirked wickedly behind her visor, purring out her next words. "_Very_ happily."

Liara's knuckles cracked where they held the controls in a death grip.

* * *

Garrus and the others had filled a couple of satchels with purloined weapons and mods and Kasumi had hacked into the mercenary captain's bank account after erasing their tracks, leaving them fifty thousand credits richer. Being a corpse robber was profitable, if distasteful. Still, Shepard hadn't accumulated millions of credits during the Saren campaign by being respectful of the dead, and even Ashley had stopped complaining after their hundredth merc kill and her third rifle upgrade. If initial impressions were any indication, however, Samara might have protested. Rather forcefully. When Garrus led them into the police station, Shepard was quickly confronted by a cold pair of pale blue eyes that seemed to be boring into his soul in search of answers. Despite his displeasure at being so closely scrutinized, he appreciated the evident frankness of the woman.

"Commander Shepard, I take it."

"The downside to being plastered all over the news feeds: recognizable by everyone from mercs to justicars." Shepard gave her a faint smile and stepped over to hold out a datapad. "The information you were looking for. Your fugitive left two days ago on the AML Demeter."

Samara scanned the datapad before nodding and turning her gaze on Garrus. "I am impressed."

"Impressing a justicar... I'll have to add that to my list of career accomplishments."

"It should rank high," Thane commented. "I have witnessed their prowess before."

Samara regarded the drell curiously as she stood from her cross-legged position. "I hope you were not the target of that prowess."

Shepard and Garrus exchanged a wary glance and Detective Anaya tightened her grip on the arms of her chair, but Thane quickly defused the situation with a quiet chuckle. "No, simply a witness."

"This is Thane Krios, our second-newest addition... if you're still willing, that is."

He couldn't be sure, but it seemed like Samara may have smiled very slightly. "I am. The Collectors are a blight on the galaxy." If it was a smile, it quickly vanished. "However, you have associated yourself with Cerberus. If I am to follow you, your orders must supersede the Code."

That drew a few surprised looks, particularly from Anaya. From what Garrus had told them on the way, none could imagine anything taking precedence over the justicar's code. Shepard regarded her curiously, both curious and suspicious. "What do you mean?"

The answer to that came in an oath that was both humbling and chilling.

* * *

Miranda frowned while she watched Chakwas extract the gunship's tiny slug from her left thigh as Mordin checked on their two recovering quarian patients. First a husk gashed one leg, now the other had a bullet in it. Perhaps Shepard had a point about wearing more substantial armor. The thought made her smirk. Jacob had never suggested such a thing. Some evidence of his lingering fondness for her suit's cut, perhaps. Her lips fell into a frown at the reminder of the commander's appreciation of another suit's fit. It was no wonder Shepard held such animosity toward Cerberus. Between Akuze, Admiral Kahoku, the other projects he'd shut down, and their pro-human focus while he harbored feelings for a quarian, well.

She wondered once more just how close he'd come to pulling the trigger on she and Jacob in the shuttle ride from Lazarus Station. That would have been a serious mistake, just like the one he'd made earlier. And possibly the night before. The quarian? Really? He'd traveled with a beautiful and impressionable young asari and a bold and sexy human who both had eyes for him, but chose the one in the envirosuit with incompatible amino acids? She was well aware from his psych profile that his crew was a weakness of his, evident in his decision to save lives on Virmire over safeguarding the bomb, but Tali could end up being a troubling distraction. And with the dangerous Garrus at his right hand...

"If you're concerned about scarring, you needn't be." Karin Chakwas' elegantly accented voice was usually reassuring to her patients, but Miranda shook her head. Apparently the doctor's attention hadn't been solely focused on her leg. Or perhaps she was a master at reading body language.

"I don't scar. But I am concerned about the commander. From what I've gathered, he's not prone to committing errors like the one he made earlier."

Chakwas arched a brow at her while her smile vanished. "What error is that?"

"You don't consider sending an ill quarian on a mission a lapse in judgment?" Miranda arched a brow curiously, putting on an expression of concern rather than irritation.

"She had a runny nose and a mild fever. That hardly qualifies as 'sick'." Karin returned to her work, patching up the small incision she'd made in creamy skin and sealing it with medi-gel. "Whereas you and the commander delved deep into a plague zone overrun by armed gangs by yourselves and nearly got killed. Was that a wise decision?"

"Saved thousands of lives. Rescued my assistant. Gained brilliant salarian scientist who formulated countermeasure to Collectors swarms. Necessity supersedes wisdom." Mordin's humming paused only to deliver his four clipped sentences, ones that made Karin frown and Miranda smirk.

"We're in agreement, Professor."

Karin rolled her eyes but said nothing more. Whether the Cerberus operative was genuine or not, something about her tone seemed personal instead of professional. Perhaps it would prove troubling, but it would also be a good reason to open another bottle across from her friend in his cabin later.

* * *

It was fortunate that Tali had forwarded her list of upgrade ideas for the quarian shuttle before they'd departed on their missions. It was quite possible she was unable to read her omni-tool at the moment. Shepard frowned while he perused the list while he walked through the trading floor beside Samara and Thane. He wanted to return to the Normandy to check on her but they needed to be departing Illium and he'd made a promise not to send Kal'Reegar back to the Fleet with nothing other than dead bodies, comatose survivors, and useless data. Shuttle upgrades meant little to a fleet fifty thousand ships strong, but Tali had assured them it wouldn't go unnoticed by the admiralty.

"Commander?"

"Hm?" He realized Samara had been speaking to him and shook his head. "Sorry. You were saying?"

"I was inquiring about your plan to deal with the Collectors."

Thane nodded. "Attacking them would mean passing through the Omega-4 Relay. No ship has ever returned from doing so."

That familiar fact seemed more ominous when it was voiced so calmly. Shepard drew to a stop and frowned while he gazed out at Nos Astra's skyline, nodding slowly. "Yes, I know. Of course, they said it was impossible to get to Ilos, but..."

"Yes, you've made a career out of performing the impossible." Once again he wasn't sure if Samara was amused. He had a feeling her smiles only curled her lips by a millimeter, if they existed at all. Nodding, he leaned against the railing on the edge of the trade floor and sighed quietly, gazing out at the city.

"I've had my share of impossible situations. The Illusive Man is still investigating ways of attacking the Collectors, but I have a feeling it will come down to the relay. I can't say I like that idea. Who knows where it leads? Hell, no one even knows why the damn thing is that creepy shade of red instead of blue." He let slip a humorless chuckle and shook his head, pushing off the railing and turning. "Let's talk about this later, after you're both settled in on the Normandy."

He led the way back toward the kiosks with his two newest crew members in tow. Having a righteous asari walking alongside a drell assassin would certainly make another absurd entry in his journal. If Tali ever read it, though, no doubt she'd be more amused to see him commenting on how he felt like a domesticated husband stopping by the grocery store on his way home. The thought made him snicker while he put in an order for a thruster assembly and he wondered if there was a dextro food store that sold soup. He tried not to dwell on the sobering fact that his odds of surviving the Collectors and the Reapers were... slim.

* * *

For a brief moment after Liara had fallen into a wounded silence, Tali had allowed herself a wicked grin until she remembered how close she and Garrus had come to being gunned down like vermin at the hands of the kind of trash the old squad had waded through two years prior. At the time atop that landing, she'd felt some small comfort that she would at least die beside one of the few people she trusted completely. In that moment, however, as the lights of Nos Astra's shadowed skyline zipped past, the guilt she'd felt on Freedom's Progress and Haestrom returned. On three occasions over the span of weeks she'd been a hairs' breadth from dying, only to be rescued by old friends, ones she knew would never abandon her. Stricken with shame, she blinked to hold back tears while she closed her eyes against the dizzying lights that streaked past outside the car. The silence inside the car was broken only by the occasional sniffling from a runny nose.

When the soft whining of the engine died away, Tali opened her eyes to see the sleek but blurry shape of the Normandy gleaming in the city lights a hundred meters away as Liara quickly popped open the top of the car and got out. She attempted to do the same but found herself dizzily stumbling into her friend's arms with an embarrassed scowl. She wanted nothing more than to push her away and declare herself perfectly balanced, but she had little desire to fall and crack her visor or break her nose. Restraining a sigh, she unsteadily walked along arm-in-arm beside Liara in silent tension thick enough to slow a charging krogan and filled with unasked questions.

Fifty meters had passed before she couldn't help herself and she blurted out the question that had been plaguing her. "Why do you care so much?"

Liara nearly stumbled and came to a stop to glare at Tali, all pretenses of civility flown. "You're my friend! Would you rather I didn't? Should I have left you-"

"No... about him."

Liara's anger vanished at the soft hesitation in her friend's words and the downcast gaze Tali was aiming at the floor. She suddenly seemed so uncertain and vulnerable, and it was a side of the young quarian she hadn't seen before. The truth seemed a dangerous thing and Liara was silent for a long moment before she sighed. Guiding Tali over to a bench along the wall of the dim corridor she sat her down and took a place beside her, clasping her hands on her lap while she stared over at the Normandy. The information broker tried to come up with a lie, but the friend formed the words. "There are many reasons, Tali. Yes, I do... care for him." She swallowed and tried to ignore the tension that hunched her friend's shoulders. "But there's a lot more to it. You have faith in him to lead the charge against the Reapers and so do I. I can't see anyone else doing it, between his experience, Spectre status, the Prothean beacon... everything. But it's not just that either."

Liara sighed and shook her head, staring down at her hands while Tali's own entwined nervously. "I know I'm your friend, but does it feel like I really understand you?" She saw the helmet shake subtly and nodded. "But Shepard does." A nod. "That's how I feel. Especially after our melds." Tali's slender frame stiffened and Liara fought a grimace, forcing herself to continue. "I... got more out of them than I meant to. I suppose I was... curious."

"I'm shocked," Tali muttered bitterly.

Liara closed her eyes and sighed again. "I know. I shouldn't have. It was just so exhilarating to learn about the Protheans, and he was such an intriguing mystery, and he seemed... interested in me. I just wanted to know him better."

"Then you should have kept him company when he was awake in the middle of the night instead of rummaging around in his head like a salvage yard!" Tali growled, fingers separating to clench into fists while she glared at the blurry image of her friend who bowed her head in shame.

"I - I know. But... you or Kaidan were always there," she whispered, shaking her head. "I just wanted to know him like you did. I mean, we talked a lot in the medbay, but you two were always laughing and you made him smile and... I don't know. I wondered what he told you two that he never told me. I wanted to know why you seemed so at ease with him when I was constantly stumbling over my words and making a fool of myself."

Tali scowled behind her visor. "It's not as if he didn't smile after having a chat with you, you know. But let me guess: you know what we talked about because you dug it out like you do with your new job."

Liara's voice fell to a whisper. "I... well, some of it. I'm sorry. I didn't _mean_ to pry. And I don't know what he learned about me."

"I'm sure he didn't go snooping around through your private thoughts. And they say quarians are the thieves," Tali muttered, earning a grimace from the asari.

"I'm sorry! But Tali... he chose you, even after what we shared."

"Maybe he learned more about you from your melds than you thought, then." Blurry vision didn't obscure the sight of pain on Liara's face when the asari bowed her head and squeezed her eyes shut tightly. "I hope you're satisfied."

"Satisfied with what?"

Both women looked up sharply at the sound of the familiar voice to see the man in question approaching, flanked by Thane and Samara. Shepard gestured his companions to move along without him and they continued on toward the Normandy while the commander stopped in front of them to gaze down between them with a slight frown. Tali was tense and Liara was swallowing nervously like a fish out of water, glancing at the quarian hesitantly.

When Tali did nothing but shake her head, Liara stood hurriedly. "It's nothing. I... need to get back to my office." She hesitated a moment, meeting Shepard's own uncertain gaze as if he was struggling with his own thoughts, but then slipped past him and hurried down the corridor. She didn't turn until she was at the corner leading to the trade floor, gazing back to see Shepard kneeling in front of Tali with her hands clasped in his gently. Blinking back tears, she shook her head and resumed walking with a brisk pace. At the rate she was going, she may as well have been back on Therum, isolated and alone with no end in sight.

* * *

"Hey... what's wrong?"

He knelt in front of Tali and took her hands in his as he gazed up at her, but silver eyes remained locked on the floor and she shook her head. How could she explain that the person she had considered her closest friend over the past two years had snooped around in his head and perhaps learned intimate secrets of his that he hadn't shared with his lover? That she felt like an idiot for nearly getting herself and Garrus killed because she hadn't had the simple foresight to remain behind? That she hadn't taken another dose of antibiotics in the morning because she wanted to adapt to him faster, all so that she could selfishly spend more time wrapped up in his arms, sharing the warmth of their skin?

"It's... it's nothing. I'm just dizzy." She could feel his piercing blue eyes on hers but didn't look up at them. At the moment, she wasn't in the mood to be cheered up by his gentle smile or wry humor.

"I'm not sure what you and Liara were talking about, but I know some of that look." He slid up to a seat beside her and wrapped an arm around her to draw her head onto his shoulder. She couldn't deny that she savored the embrace, though it did little to brighten her mood. "Don't blame yourself. I was the one that should have done a better job cleaning." He sighed and took her hand in his, stroking her palm with a thumb in what had become a familiar gesture. "I'm sorry."

"What!? No!" Tali exclaimed, lifting her head from his shoulder before groaning quietly at the sudden return of dizziness. She shook her head and closed her eyes to fight the mild nausea. "I snuck into _your_ cabin and took off _my_ suit. I should have sterilized it before putting it back on, or put it back together myself, or stayed behind, or taken another dose of antibiotics, or never gotten out of the damn suit in the first place!"

Tali's sudden angry tirade made Shepard flinch but he set his jaw and pulled her onto his lap, wrapping his arms around her tightly and leaning his forehead against her visor. "Tali. Enough... please. Look at me." It took her a moment to open her eyes, though their silver gleam wavered behind the purple glass and met his gaze. "We're both responsible, and I knew just as well as you that it was a risk. It's _our _error, not yours or mine. We knew this wasn't going to be easy." Her shoulders didn't relax, so he changed tactics and gave her a wry smile. "Even though, as it turns out, I am in fact easy. At least when it comes to quarians with shiny eyes." When Tali snickered quietly his smile widened. That was a start, even if he knew it would take more than that to coax a true good mood out of her. Slipping his arms around her back and under her knees, he rose and started walking toward the airlock.

"The crew's going to talk," Tali muttered as she closed her eyes and let herself relax in his arms. She never considered herself a legitimate entry in his mental 'rescued damsels' list, but she could admit to herself that she rather enjoyed being carried like one.

"Let's see how long that lasts when I'm glaring at everyone in sight. Besides, you don't have the monopoly on being fiercely protective of your mate."

Tali groaned at the reminder of the second physician on the ship. "Oh, keelah. I'll give you anything if you take me to Chakwas and not Mordin."

Shepard raised intrigued brows, lowering his voice as they neared the airlock. "Oh? Anything? We'll have to discuss that when you're well again and my cabin is fully sterilized."

A three-fingered fist glanced ineffectually off his breastplate and they shared a chuckle.

* * *

Once the medbay doors had closed behind Shepard and his quarian cargo, Kelly turned back to her breakfast companions with a smile on her face that Jacob could only describe as wistful or perhaps dreamy. "That's so romantic."

Jacob glanced at the icy expression on Miranda's face through the glass, remembering the tension, blood, the smell of burning metal and polymer, and the dead mercenary captain with a grimace as his protein shake went untouched. "I don't see what's so romantic about Miranda getting shot and Tali and Garrus nearly getting killed." He leaned back in his chair at the forward mess hall table and finally took a sip of his drink while Kasumi picked listlessly at her own pancakes.

"Yeah, I don't think 'romantic' really describes what goes on aboard this ship." Kasumi cut off Kelly's imminent reply. "I mean, for what Cerberus is paying I didn't expect this job to be puppies and roses, but the body count is ridiculous."

Jacob was more accustomed to combat and simply shrugged while Kelly attempted a reassuring smile, her more juvenile expression fading away. "I know it's outside your usual experiences as a thie... infiltrator. I mean, the entire mission is pretty daunting. Track down and destroy an enigmatic and technologically superior species that are puppets for an ancient race of synthetics that wipe out all life in the galaxy every fifty millennia? The only mission that compares was the one the original Normandy took on two years ago. It's scary. And stressful." Jacob's brows rose in silent agreement while Kasumi said nothing, cutting pieces of pancake into kanji of her name. "But it's important to find something to smile about, or you'll end up with white hair, wrinkles, and explosive blood pressure."

Jacob didn't miss Kasumi's grimace at the mention of white hair and chuckled, sipping his drink. "And you choose to smile about the commander changing hats from soldier to gentleman? You watch too many movies."

"Does he always change tack like that?" Kasumi mused, setting her fork down and frowning at Kelly. "It's so strange. One minute he's joking and smiling and the next he's shooting defenseless mercs in the heart. I mean, he doesn't have multiple personalities or anything, does he?"

The same question had been on Jacob's mind, but he knew how many ears were on the small ship and he decide to keep silent while Kelly blinked in surprise. "It's a bit soon for an after-action report. What are you referring to?"

Kasumi relayed the story of the short battle with the Eclipse mercs and their captain's execution at Shepard's hand, drawing a frown from the yeoman while she stared thoughtfully down at her plate. "I mean, you'd think he was a knight in shining armor or a samurai from the way the galactic press talked about him. And then he just executed that Eclipse captain in cold blood."

"Joker, I forget: what did Shepard get his second Star of Terra and his promotion to Staff Commander for?"

Garrus' flanging voice drew their attention and the trio turned to see the turian and pilot making their way toward the kitchen side by side, the latter frowning at Kasumi. "Uh, I think it had something to do with saving the entire galaxy from extinction, but I'm not sure. I mean, I have a vague memory of dodging fire from an entire fleet of geth and a two kilometer sapient dreadnought..."

"Yeah, so do I. I think it was even on the news. Come to think of it, I think the asari, salarians, and even my people awarded him decorations for that." Garrus and Joker folded their arms and leaned back against the counter, staring at the three humans at the table.

"I have a vague recollection of getting some, too. Not that I didn't totally deserve some for killing a Reaper. But I think there's even memorials for him on the Presidium and Elysium."

"They're building one on Akuze, too."

"Right, almost forgot. Hey, how many people did he save between Elysium and Feros? Thousands?"

"Millions, if you include Terra Nova."

Kasumi opened her mouth but Joker didn't miss a beat. "Oh, and didn't he get spaced saving my life?"

"Don't remind me. Dumbest decision in galactic history."

"Yeah, I heard he used his own fingers to pinch one of your arteries closed back on Omega. Idiot."

"Oh, come on!" Kasumi finally managed to exclaim. "I wasn't saying he's a heartless murderer like some Blood Pack vorcha. It's just... I don't know. I don't understand him."

Joker cracked a smirk and turned to retrieve a bag of chocolate chips from a cabinet while Garrus' mandibles twitched in amusement. "Yeah, I think Tali and I started that club back on the original Normandy. But it's really not that complicated: don't get in the way of his people or his mission, or you end up dead. Those mercs did both."

"I think we're concerned about the fact that that Eclipse captain was helpless," Jacob said while Kasumi nodded in agreement.

Joker snorted but left it to Garrus while he carefully stirred chocolate chips into pancake batter under Gardner's silent observation. The turian's voice shifted into a familiar tone of dry sarcasm. "Right, and if Shepard had said 'Please, don't warn the fugitive when we leave', she would have obeyed as a matter of honor. Come on." He gazed skeptically between the three of them. "We fought our share of merc trash two years ago. We're fighting a lot of it now. Eclipse are all murderers; they have to be to get their uniforms. And he wanted to keep our newest addition's mission from being jeopardized." Jacob and Kasumi traded an uncertain glance, the former shrugging his broad shoulders slightly. The conflict on the thief's face was evident even in the dim shadows cast by her hood and Garrus shook his head. "Things look different when you have a couple hundred kills and a dozen letters written home to grieving families. Shepard has five times that, a Reaper to his credit, Prothean civilization burned into his brain, and the fate of the galaxy on his shoulders. Think about that for a while."

Jacob and Kasumi both blanched and Kelly sighed quietly. The mess hall was quiet for a long moment before the medbay doors hissed open to reveal Shepard backing out with a smirk on his lips and a finger pointed at someone inside. "If I find you down in the hangar without a doctor's note, you're not getting any chicken soup. Well, whatever it is turians call their equivalent of chicken. I couldn't pronounce it."

"But Shepard-"

Tali's protest was cut off when the doors slid shut and the commander just chuckled softly, turning and heading out of sight without a glance their way.

"Like I said: romantic." Kelly grinned wide in an attempt to spread some cheer, wondering about the strange expressions of poorly suppressed amusement on Garrus and Joker's faces.

* * *

"We've got to make a stop in the Hourglass Nebula, but we'll send you off at Illium's relay when we get back. Shouldn't take more than a few hours. The doctors say your people are stable enough to travel."

Garrus exited the elevator to see Kal'Reegar nodding from a seat at the Kodiak's open hatch while he ate what looked like soup from a tube attached to his mask. Shepard was on a ladder staring intently at what looked like a new thruster half-attached to the quarian shuttle before he glared down at his omni-tool.

"Oh, spirits, don't tell me Tali let you near their shuttle. She must be delirious with fever." Garrus chuckled at the glare his friend shot him while he walked over.

"I told her Kal'Reegar and I could handle a simple thrus- shit!" Shepard cursed when a jolt of electricity shocked him and he shook out his stiffened hand with a grimace. Reegar's chortle of amusement sounded odd with his mouth full of soup and Garrus snickered, waving for the quarian to stay seated as he rapped his knuckles on Shepard's back.

"Get down before you lose an arm. I'm not risking Tali's wrath twice in two days, even if it would mean a promotion for me." Shepard was quick to jump off the ladder and Garrus climbed up, ignoring the dangerous smirk being cast his way.

Reegar pulled the empty tube from its port with a quiet pop of the seal and sighed contentedly, watching Garrus skillfully attach the power cables in the proper fashion. "You ticked her off? Did you accidentally jab her with a talon or something? Would explain how she got sick. She didn't get any suit punctures on Haestrom."

Garrus decided against glancing the commander's way and focused on the fuel line, shaking his head and suppressing a laugh. "Turian bacteria, but not my fault. Shepard can fill in the details."

"I can see it now: the Garrus and Joker Show, twenty four hours a day."

Garrus swallowed and concentrated on the thruster while Reegar chuckled quietly behind him. "Right. Some things I'm better off not knowing." The quarian's voice turned serious. "Really, Shepard, you didn't have to do this."

He heard Shepard sigh. "I swear, it's like quarians actively resist generosity. Look, Kal, I know your people aren't beggars, and any people that drift between stars for three hundred years are certainly independent. I only spent a day on only one ship of the Fleet, but it's just... I don't know. I want to help, if I can. I lost my home once, but I could have tried again somewhere else. You don't even have that. And with the Reapers out there... I hate to say it, but we might need every ship in the galaxy. A couple of shuttle upgrades isn't much, but it's all I can do right now."

As the hangar fell silent Garrus stared at the thruster, remembering the twenty Turian cruisers lost at the Battle of the Citadel. Without Sovereign, that number would have been half that or less, against a Geth armada. Losing ten cruisers to one Reaper was not good odds and he knew Shepard was as aware of that fact as he was. The Hierarchy should have known it as well, but the turians were doing nothing. His disgust at that fact had nearly led him to Councilor Sparatus' office if not for the fact that he would have been ruining his consideration for the Spectres. Hopefully with Anderson in the chair the Alliance was at least... hmm.

"Have the quarians ever considered establishing diplomatic relations with the Alliance?" He turned to see Shepard and Reegar both staring at him and shrugged. "Trade mining efforts for access to shipyards? Technical expertise for some land to build dextro greenhouses? Things like that? The other council races would never go for it, but humanity is known for being a bit, ah, unconventional." When Shepard and Reegar kept staring, Garrus glanced between them uncomfortably. "What?"

"Nothing, it's just... a good idea. Can't remember the last time you had one." Shepard chuckled and looked over at Reegar, who was nodding slowly.

"Yeah, it is. Until the politicians get in the way, that is." Reegar sighed, but he still stared contemplatively down at the hangar floor.

"Yeah." Shepard scowled. "Maybe it wasn't a good idea for me to cut ties with the Alliance after all."

Shrugging, Garrus turned back to the thruster and began bolting down the exhaust port. "Just a thought."

The hangar remained absent voices but heavy with thought while Garrus' tools clicked on tightening bolts.

* * *

His ruined and discarded pauldron replaced, Shepard checked over his weapons in the forward airlock while Jacob, Miranda, Samara and Thane did the same. It was a simple recovery job for the Silaris armor materials the Illusive Man had ordered dropped off on Daratar, but biotics would be useful for moving heavy crates and Miranda had been insistent on 'stretching out her leg'. Jack, in her charming manner, had refused to do grunt work and went back to sleep after hurling a datapad at him.

"You sure we'll be okay for this, Shepard? Five biotics is a little light for vicious, maneating crates, you know."

"Laugh it up, Jacob." Still, he snickered and attached his pistol to his hip before hitting the controls for the outer hatch while Joker slowed their descent and brought them within half a kilometer of the sheltered drop zone. The wind forced them all to take a step back and regain their balance – except for Thane, of course. The drell seemed as if he could ride an angry thresher maw for sport even with greased hands. Apparently, he also had a sense of humor.

"Troubling. I was led to believe these crates had peaceful intentions." Jacob frowned, the tension between him and the assassin obvious, but Miranda cracked a smile and Samara's lips might have twitched. Liara had been an open book, but the justicar was wrapped in chains and written in ancient Greek.

_"Commander, I'm getting some strange readings at the landing coordinates. Odd energy signatures."_

Shepard nearly sighed. _Naturally._ "Explain."

_"Not sure. Lots of static electricity in the air and some of the rock is refractory and... you don't really care about that."_

_ "I predict the odds-"_

_ "Never tell me the odds. It's the first rule of being a robot copilot."_

Joker's grumbling about EDI had become familiar, and Shepard grinned. "Don't worry, Joker. We're outfitted for vicious, maneating crates. Just drop us off."

_"Aye aye."_

Thirty seconds later they hopped off the Normandy's deck and onto the dusty soil of Daratar, wandering down the curving slope toward the twenty crates that awaited them. Shepard turned the corner but immediately drew back.

"I should have known."

Miranda arched a brow as the others came to a stop. "Known what? If you try to tell me there really _are_ vicious, maneating crates, I swear I'm going to-"

"Take a look."

She regarded him curiously and stepped forward to peer around the rock while Jacob did the same with a chuckle. "What, do the crates have mouths and fangs?"

_"ONLINE."_

The deep, mechanical word reached their ears in triplicate and the three humans cursed.

* * *

"Hey, Tali. Feeling better?" Joker smiled and gestured her toward the copilot's chair, which she sank into a bit more heavily than usual.

"Much. I'm still a bit woozy but at least I can see straight now. What are the strange readings you wanted me to look at?" Joker moved to tap his panel but EDI put the information up on Tali's display and the two organics shared a look of irritation before returning their attention to the readings. "Hmm. Well, they look kind of like-"

_"We've got a problem here! Three hungry YMIR mechs!"_

Jacob's tense voice made them both blanch. One lone YMIR was a fun diversion for Shepard. Two was trouble. Three on open ground was suicide. Tali took a breath and keyed the comm. "All right, just fall back and we'll load up a shuttle with the rest of the squad and some heavy weapons."

The sound of chaingun fire and the explosion of a rocket filled the cockpit for a moment before Shepard's irritated voice returned. _"Can't. Two of them went right for the crates until we shot at them as a distraction."_

"You did _what?!_ Oh, keelah, you're insane. Just fall back!" Tali glanced at Joker, who was on an interior channel calling the squad to the hangar bay.

_"It's a dead end up the slope we came from, Tali! If the others can't get here in one minute then we've got to keep dodging from cover to cover in this damn rock field!"_

Tali's eyes went wide behind her visor and she glanced at Joker, who shook his head. "Two and a half, Shepard. It was your bright idea for us to do a mineral survey while you-"

_"Can it, Joker! Jacob said he got the M-920 working. Tell Garrus to grab it and get it prepped, then hover a hundred meters off the slope. We'll... shit!"_

"Shepard!" Tali squeezed the armrests of the chair as the sound of a rocket exploding came over the comm. "Damn it!"

_"He is currently occupied attempting to get two of them to shoot each other. One moment." _Samara's voice was unnervingly calm.

Tali stared wild-eyed at Joker, who was doing the same. "He's doing _what!?"_

"What the hell is going on?" Zaeed growled as he and Grunt stormed up to the cockpit, rifles in hand.

_"They encountered three hostile YMIR mechs,"_ EDI explained.

"Three YMIRs and we're _missing it_!" Grunt rumbled. "Get us there, cripple. Now!"

"I am! Jesus! Hold your horses!"

_"What are horses?"_ Thane's voice, like Samara's, was remarkably level.

"Not now, damn it!" Tali yelled. She keyed the intercom. "Garrus, get your bony turian ass up here and bring my shotg-"

"Don't call me bony. You're not Shepard." Garrus dropped her collapsed Eviscerator on her lap and snatched the twenty kilogram M-920 away from an eager Grunt and his greedy hands. Tali cringed at the site of a krogan attempting to play with what had been described as a miniature nuke launcher.

"Don't touch!"

_"Who's touching you?"_ Shepard growled over the comm, sounding out of breath. Tali ignored the question.

"Get your ass killed and it won't be you anymore, Shepard," Jack practically sang as she approached with her shotgun in hand.

"Shut up," Tali hissed as she rose to her feet and expanded her shotgun, glaring daggers at Jack who was snickering until Garrus shoved past her and into the airlock where the sound of an ominous whining began.

"Christ, Garrus, don't charge that thing up inside the ship!" Joker screeched.

_"The projectile of the M-920 requires thirty meters to activate, Mister Mor-"_

_"For fuck's sake, Joker, what's your ETA?"_ Shepard snarled into the comm over the renewed sounds of a storm of gunfire and another explosion.

"Twenty seconds! Get out of there! Now!" Tali replied, her foot tapping up a storm on the deck while she adjusted her shotgun in her hands.

_"You heard her! Move! I'll draw their fire!"_

"Oh, keelah, not again," Tali moaned while Mordin patted her shoulder.

"Worry too much. Shepard master at extracting himself from dangerous situations with small odds of success. The, ah, SR-1 incident aside."

"He's a master at giving Tali and me heart attacks," Joker muttered while he licked dry lips and focused intently on the controls, bringing the Normandy down into position. "In position! Garrus, ready?"

_"Ready,"_ the turian confirmed from his position kneeling at the opened external airlock hatch, M-920 charged and awaiting the dual trigger presses that would fire it. _"I figured Shepard would be the one to get the first shot with this thing. Glad I was wrong."_

"If you miss, I'll kill you," Tali hissed while they all stared at viewscreens. Outside the ship, Miranda, Jacob, Samara and Thane had sprinted around the corner from the field of crates and low rocks and up the slope to where they'd been dropped off. Suddenly, Shepard came charging around the corner as well in a full sprint, biotic barrier glowing fiercely from chaingun impacts and shattering just as he exited the line of fire. Tali breathed a loud sigh of relief, watching him dash to the top of the slope and drop onto his belly with the others.

"This is like waiting for the fireworks on New Year's back in London," Zaeed said as he cracked his knuckles eagerly.

_"I thought you were from Johannesburg," _Jacob responded breathlessly.

_"I thought Sydney,"_ came Miranda's winded guess.

"Spent time in all three. Long story."

_"And it's one I'd love to hear about over a pint or ten, but not right now."_ Shepard was as out of breath as Jacob but his commander's growl came through clearly.

"Get ready for a show," Garrus breathed as the last of the three mechs was safely around the corner from the precious cargo he was attempting to avoid vaporizing. He depressed the dual triggers and the heavy projectile shot out of the M-920, streaking toward the middle YMIR. When it hit, the ship trembled as the bright interior lighting was suddenly washed out by a fierce glow of orange coming through the open airlock and cockpit windows. Everyone stared wide-eyed at the immense, angry fireball which consumed the entirety of the viewscreens.

"Keelah," Tali whispered, frantically panning the image over to the top of the slope. At the sight of five dark shapes barely visible through the haze and swirling ash and smoke, she exhaled the deep breath she'd been holding. "Shepard? Are you all right?" No response. "...Shepard? Answer me!"

"I can see them moving. Hang on." Joker slipped the Normandy back and brought the nose to the top of the slope, where Garrus and Mordin jumped out, followed quickly by Tali. She saw Shepard attempting to stand beside Jacob, but the two men promptly wavered unsteadily and fell back down, blood trickling from their ears. Miranda, to her credit, simply lay on the ground staring up at the sky while Thane and Samara did the same. Tali dashed over to her boyfriend and helped him up into a sitting position while he blinked at her, grinning weakly.

"Are you okay?" He tilted his head curiously, bringing a flutter of anxiety back. "What's wrong?"

His brows furrowed and he pointed up at his ear, shaking his head. "I can't hear anything."

The clumsy and loud sound of his voice made Tali groan and glance at the others, who were all sitting up now at the hands of the rest of the squad. Samara and Thane were free of blood, but Miranda and Jacob looked as unhappy and damaged as Shepard. Mordin caught her eye and flashed one of his thin-lipped smiles. "Hearing loss temporary. Ruptured eardrums, easily repairable. Back to normal in three hours."

Shepard stared at Mordin's moving mouth but frowned at the lack of comprehension until he received the message Tali typed out and sent Miranda, Jacob, and him on their omni-tools. Nodding, he gave his girlfriend a reassuring smile and then turned his gaze to the stone cliff and the narrow slope down. It had a rather interesting bowl shape to it now, smooth and glowing a dull orange. His jaw dropped open, and so did Tali's when she caught sight of the destruction.

"Keelah."

"Better than New Year's Eve," Zaeed agreed, laughing.

* * *

_Commander, we need to talk about what happened on Illium._

Shepard appeared to sigh – inaudibly, of course – at the message and turned his head to gaze over at where she lay on a medical bed on her side, head propped on a hand and bandages over her ears. Behind her, Jacob was sound asleep, like the two recovering quarian patients that would shortly be departing. With Garrus left in temporary command of the Normandy given the CO and XO's hearing and balance impairment, Miranda had decided to make the best of the idle time. Shepard, however, appeared none too interested. She glanced down at her omni-tool and his reply.

_Met up with Liara. Killed mercs. Recruited two more dangerous aliens. Mission accomplished._

Miranda arched a black brow at him but he was simply staring blankly at her. Stubborn pain in the ass of a man! She had to admit, sometimes his quirky humor made her lips twitch, but she wasn't about to let him off the hook like that. Shaking her head, she moved to reply but paused. _Hm. You know, he really seems to respond better to humor. _Nodding, she started typing.

_Of course it was; you had me. I'm just a little concerned about what happened with Tali. I think we should discuss it._

She looked up and watched him read, awaiting a change in his expression. If anything, his mild irritation had turned into a mask of stone. Damn that man. She should have known better than to try out _his_ tactics. He was using her own now.

_Unexpected variable. It happens. Tali and Chakwas will be more careful._

Short and to the point, if a rather insulting lie. Miranda wanted to sigh and voice the questions that were really on her mind, drumming her fingers on the bed idly while she contemplated how to ask them without clamming him up or pissing him off. She didn't know what it was, but when it came to her, Shepard was a minefield. With anyone else, things seemed simple. It certainly had been far simpler when he was just a biotech project: savior of the Citadel or not, he was a soldier; surely he would end up being quite controllable by a woman with her capabilities. _Apparently not._ Miranda snorted, then noticed her screen flashing at her.

_You look troubled. Stop worrying. You're off duty for the next two hours. Here, enjoy._

Miranda regarded the extranet link he'd sent her curiously before following it. Her omni-tool screen was quickly saturated with pictures and videos of small, furry kittens of dozens of breeds. As soon as she realized her lips had curled into a smile she clamped down on it and frowned over at Shepard, but he'd already turned onto his side away from her and had his head nestled comfortably into his pillow.

Miranda sighed and then returned her attention to the extranet site, allowing herself a chuckle in the safe silence of the medbay where recovering eardrums would hear nothing. Shepard was a pain in the ass all right, but she wasn't about to let the matter drop _that_ easily. As she watched a small white ball of fluff fall into a crate, she idly wondered if the galaxy's most lethal spectre had an extranet page of kittens bookmarked. Probably not. After all, he apparently was the hamster type.

* * *

When the elevator doors slid shut behind Garrus, Chakwas and Mordin, Tali sighed and stared into the quarian shuttle in silence for a moment beside Kal'Reegar. Their dead were secured, their survivors strapped in and under sedation, the lockers were filled with salvaged geth parts from Haestrom, and the shuttle was much improved thanks to Shepard's credits and Garrus' skill. Still, she felt guilty sending her friend back alone to face the wrath of the admiralty board. And her father.

"Don't worry, ma'am. I'm sure all the salvage I'm bringing back will take the edge off his-"

"Wrath?"

"Keelah, and I was going to say 'irritation'. Now I'm terrified."

Tali laughed softly and shook her head. While their mission was technically a success, Kal was returning home with a dozen dead and what was likely useless data on a star their people had lost centuries ago, but he was still trying to cheer her up. Not for the first time she wished he could stay aboard and join the squad. "Well, he's a lot older than you and he doesn't have the shield enhancements I gave you."

"Yeah, thanks for those. Saved my life down there. Along with Shepard."

Tali couldn't help but smile. "Now you know how I survived an army of geth and krogan. Even if Shepard tried his hardest to get us all killed in the Mako."

Kal laughed, recalling an omni-tool recording from one of her first missions, to recover the asari that became Tali's squadmate and friend. "Please tell me he doesn't try his hand at piloting."

"Oh, he does. Actually, Joker said he's 'decent'. It's Garrus that terrifies me."

They shared a grin before lapsing into silence for another moment. Finally, Kal stepped over to the hatch and nodded his head at her. "Be careful out there, ma'am. I'll send you a message when I'm home. Well, if I'm not spaced for letting you stay aboard a Cerberus vessel. Tell Shepard goodbye and thanks for me."

Tali flinched at the mention of being spaced but shook off the memory and nodded. "I will. Now you'd better go before he tries to add you to the squad."

"Don't tempt me, ma'am. I like the cooking. You'd better be careful or you won't be able to fit back into your suit."

"_Back_ into...?" Tali sputtered. "Wh-what do you...?"

Kal'Reegar just snapped to attention and hopped up into the shuttle, keying the hatch before she could finish her sentence. As she watched him climb into the cockpit and start the engines, Tali rolled her eyes and shook her head. _Bosh'tet._

* * *

When the quarian shuttle was safely through the mass relay, Joker turned toward the turian in the copilot's seat. "Time to go back to civilization, where you can find a decent steak and real beer."

Garrus chuckled while he typed a letter to Liara asking for her assistance tracking down Sidonis. "You're the only Alliance soldier I know that's excited to be leaving a planet full of asari. What was it you said earlier about Shepard giving you heart attacks? Does Tali know?"

"What?! Oh, that's it. Give me that stick you keep up your ass so I can beat you to death with it!" Joker made a show of turning his cap around and cracking his knuckles.

_"Physical violence against the commanding officer, acting or otherwise, is a grave offense according to Cerberus regulations, Mister Moreau. And quite possibly hazardous to your skeletal system."_

"I didn't ask you, you damned malignant tumor! Stop eavesdropping on my private conversations! And stop lowering the temperature in the cockpit!"

Garrus listened to the bickering about the temperature with a smirk while EDI prattled on about warmer temperatures being more conducive to human somnolence. After a minute of their back and forth, he reached over and hit the mute on the control panel. "Spirits, I take it back. Now I know what Ashley meant when she said Wrex and I bickered like an old married couple. Wait until Shepard hears that you've got a thing for the autopilot."

"Yeah, and wait until Kelly hears you sleep with your rifle."

Garrus flinched. "What? What is _that_ supposed to mean? Why would she...?"

Joker chuckled ominously and accelerated toward the relay.

* * *

Shepard exited the medbay with a yawn to see Tali standing in the middle of the mess hall, her head turning first toward the elevator, then to the sleeping pods, and back to the elevator. Cracking a smile, he stepped up quietly behind her and tapped her shoulder. When she jumped and whirled around he held up his palms defensively. "Hey, it's just me." His voice sounded a bit muffled still, but Karin had assured him his hearing would be back to normal in the morning.

"I thought I asked you two years ago to stop sneaking up on me like that," Tali muttered, her fingers entangling at her waist.

"It's not my fault you never upgraded your auditory pickups." Flashing her a tired smile, he gestured her toward the elevator. She hesitated for a moment before accompanying him, though her fingers continued their dance. Why was she so nervous? Once they were in the elevator his yawn would have impressed a varren.

"Are you tired?"

Shepard opened his eyes and gave her another sleepy smile, nodding. "I played the part of ping pong ball again to keep the mechs distracted. You look a bit bushed yourself."

Tali recalled the table top game with paddles some of the crew had played during a brief shore leave on Terra Nova, but his reference to foliage gave her pause. "I look like... a plant?"

The doors slid open and he took her hand with a quiet laugh, leading her into his cabin. "'Bushed' is just another word for tired." He hit the panel next to the model display to dim the lights and led her down toward the bed, glancing back over his shoulder at her with a grin. "Remind me to learn Khelish. It's only fair." He expected to see her eyes brighten a little at the thought, as she had been a quick study of his own language, but she only nodded absently and glanced around the cabin. Was she still upset about what happened on Illium? He released her hand and turned to wrap his arms around her, caressing her back warmly. "Hey, what's wrong? Are you still bothered about the mission?"

She had forgotten about it until he mentioned it, and she tensed in his arms. "I... well, yes. But still... I mean, I know we're going to be on the Citadel for a couple of days, not Ilos, but I'm still recovering and I don't want to jeopardize anything."

"Oh."

Tali sighed inwardly at the way his face fell. Until the previous day she hadn't realized just how large a problem her immune system was, even with an airtight cabin with excellent air filtration. "I mean, I'd probably just get a runny nose and a headache again, which would be totally worth being able to feel your warmth and the bed again, but..." But... what? Damn it, would she be eternally conflicted about measuring the mission against what she wanted and pleasing her boyfriend?

"...But I forgot to give the cabin a cleaning." He looked dejected for a moment but then his face brightened. "Well, I can take care of that while you go get some soup."

Tali felt a little rush of warmth in her chest when he gave her that soft smile. The crazy man was willing to postpone sleep just so she could enjoy being free of her suit? He seemed a bit too tired to be thinking of... well. When he'd burned up three days worth of calories under chaingun and rocket fire and was recovering from ruptured eardrums? _Keelah._ She couldn't help but beam like a fool behind her visor and she shook her head, grabbing his hand before he could slip too far toward the door. "No. It's okay. I really should let my body recover." Yes, that would work. He could get right to sleep, she could let her immune system recover, and they'd still get to sleep beside each other. Granted, she didn't expect it to top sharing body heat after two bouts of lovemaking that left every muscle in her body blissfully limp, but it was definitely a huge step up from a cramped sleeper pod.

Shepard regarded her curiously for a moment but then smiled and nodded. "Okay. I suppose it's the wiser course of action, even if I'd enjoy keeping you warm." He took her hand and tugged her to the bed to sit her down, removing her boots while she allowed herself to collapse onto her back with a quiet groan.

"You have to stop spoiling me," Tali muttered, "or nobody on the fleet will recognize me when I visit."

"Suck it up, beautiful. I know it's horrible, being forced to suffer things like real food and a bed and shower, but you signed up for it."

Tali wriggled her suit-clad feet when they were free of the heavy boots and smiled dreamily with closed eyes. "Mmm. Don't forget backrubs. And sex." She giggled and heard his quiet answering laugh before he slid her body up the bed and pulled the sheets from under her.

"Yes, the worst of the lot. You get a reprieve tonight, though."

"Oh. Damn. Maybe tomorrow..."

Shepard smiled at the sound of her sleepy voice and the absence of her gleaming eyes behind the visor. "We'll see." When she didn't reply he divested himself of his boots and socks before slipping under the covers. Tali instinctively wriggled toward him to find his embrace and he melded his form against hers with a yawn, closing his eyes. He had a feeling that even his previous outlet of playing music late in the night wouldn't have been enough this time around. Not without her. Allowing himself a smile at the knowledge that she'd let her own troubles slip away to relax in his arms, he soon drifted off with a final musing: just how hard Captain Shepard would slap him when she learned he'd been alive for over two weeks without contacting her?


	25. Hannah

**Author's note:**

_This chapter is something of a character experiment for me. Hopefully the pacing doesn't suffer for it._

_Whether approving or critical, I appreciate the reviews. They're good feedback and motivation._

* * *

The Citadel was once a place of happy memories for her, a marvelous sight that held the promise of a few days of contentment. The same was true of many women she knew, but for them the ancient space station was a place of amazing variety in food, trinkets, fashions, new friends, and entertainment. In truth, it had once been all of that to her as well, but they had never been the primary reason for her visits. And those visits had stopped two years earlier. Enveloped in an ethereal lavender nebula that cast the 'sky' from the Wards in a magical glow, the Citadel was deemed home or paradise by millions, a place of comfort or wonder. For Hannah Shepard, it was the last place she had ever seen her son alive.

Even in victory, the Alliance Navy had been throw into turmoil at the news that a geth armada following an immense dreadnought had cost them and the turians a combined total of almost thirty ships with dozens of others crippled. The Kilimanjaro, on which she served as XO, was quick to arrive on the scene to support the battered turians. At the time, she had never been so proud and happy to see her son.

A bitter smile pulled weakly at Hannah's lips while she watched the flow of traffic to and from the Citadel from her place at the conference lounge abutting the navigation bridge. The memory was still painfully vivid.

_Flux seemed a decent enough place, even if the music was a bit loud for ears accustomed to stringed instruments and the soundproofing of spaceships. Karin Chakwas had directed her to the club with obvious irritation that her patient had used his spectre status to get himself off the ship and out of her observation, but there was a hint of amusement in the twitch of her lips while she'd relayed the information. Hannah had a feeling she'd be keeping in contact with the good doctor in order to gain some amusing anecdotes about what her son had been up to on his first command._

_Hannah stepped inside after showing her identification to the bouncer and tipping him fifty credits to keep her presence unannounced. She gazed around the club, torn between excitement and apprehension. A large portion of the crowd wore casual Alliance uniforms, too many to be from the Normandy alone, and there were quite a few civilians on the arms of celebrating sailors as well as a party of armored salarians. All in all, it looked like quite the celebration._

_Her cerulean eyes stopped wandering when they came across an isolated table at which a rather large krogan sat pounding back a drink with a blue-armored turian while an asari, a female quarian, and a bearded lieutenant watched with rapt attention. It amused her that she already knew all their names, even if her son hadn't included images. When she first read that four out of the six on his ground team were aliens, she'd been skeptical. It was hard to erase the memories of the fear she'd endured as a mother of a three year-old while her husband was off engaging the first species humanity had ever made contact with, or the anger she'd felt when he'd returned home recovering from a spinal injury serious enough to convince him to take medical retirement. It was her son's written anecdotes about all the ways they'd saved each other's lives that left her wanting to meet them all._

_When Garrus and Wrex slammed their mugs down on the table while Joker cheered enthusiastically, she watched as sapphire and silver eyes flicked away from the display and toward the dance floor. She grinned when she followed their gazes to their target. Ah. That explained it. Hannah couldn't help but laugh when she saw a stunning brunette poking at her son's ribs in what was no doubt an attempt to get him to move more than halfheartedly. For someone who had grown up at home climbing trees and jumping fences, he apparently had all the grace of a krogan on the dance floor. And if the smirks they were trading were any indication, whatever they were bantering about was apparently familiar. Snickering, she made her way over to the dance floor until she was close enough to hear his familiar baritone voice._

_"Ash, I swear, if the three of you keep dragging me onto the dance floor I'm going to pay Wrex ten thousand credits to take my place."_

_"Well, skipper, you could always just shoot us. Oh, wait, I forgot." She sighed dramatically. "You're a gimp."_

_'Skipper'? Aha. Williams. Definitely the gutsy type. Especially with the saucy grin she was flashing her commander. With one of her own, Hannah stepped up beside them. "Actually, I bet the commander can shoot equally well with either hand. May I cut in?"_

_The look of surprise on her son's face was enough to make her want to break out into laughter, but she flashed him a warning look and a wink before glancing back at Ashley, who had suddenly broke into a frown._

_"Actually-"_

_"Sure, why not?" The spectre grinned and pulled a credit chit from his pocket, depositing it in Ashley's hand. "I'll only be a few. Buy everyone a round for me, Chief."_

_The mention of her title made Williams nod curtly and give an 'aye aye' before she reluctantly wandered off. Hannah heard her mutter something about cougars, but she waited until the chief was safely out of earshot before she broke into laughter and gave her son a tight hug which he returned with one arm. Hannah ignored the unfriendly stares she was receiving from three females and turned._

_"I'm not sure whether to say 'thank you' or to call you a pain in the ass, mom."_

_Pulling back, she returned her son's wry smile with a charming one of her own. "And here I thought you'd appreciate having three women glaring at your dance partner with jealousy. But I suppose I could always chastise you for being on a crowded dance floor with one arm in a sling. Or berate you for nearly letting yourself be crushed. Or-"_

_"Oh, be quiet."_

_She ignored the embarrassed way he rubbed the back of his neck and grinned insouciantly. "Anyways, I'm not sure why they're jealous of a woman who has twenty-four years on you. Just what have you been doing in your free time?"_

_He rolled his eyes and took her hand, pulling her from the dance floor. "Other than avoiding you? Well, let's see. I maxed out my bank account at ten million credits, racked up around six hundred kills, learned Prothean, talked a rogue spectre into blowing his own head off, and helped bring down an ancient sapient dreadnought that's the vanguard of galactic extinction every fifty millennia, all the while having to tell the Council to go fuck itself while they nearly got the entire galaxy annihilated because of their stupidity. What about you?"_

_Hannah blinked at the ice her son's voice acquired while he spoke. It was a tone she hadn't heard in years, one she hoped she'd never hear again. Where had it come from? A minute ago he was fine. Just what exactly had he been through?_  
_"Sorry." He sighed and rubbed his temple, dropping into a bar stool at the end of the counter with a weariness that surprised her. "I didn't mean to... not sure what came over me."_

_She slid to a seat beside him and took her hand in his to squeeze it warmly, giving him the patient, loving smile she rarely used but instinctively knew as a mother. "After what you've been through over the last few months, it's okay. Why don't you start at the beginning?"_

_The tired and grateful look he gave her should have broken her heart, but instead she found it warmed with the reassurance that he hadn't slipped back into his old cloak of bitter anger. And he wouldn't, she decided. Not if she had anything to say about it._

"Captain? ...Captain Shepard?"

"Hm?" Hannah looked up from her reverie to see a young crewman giving her a hesitant look. "I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Commander Narita wanted me to inform you that the first shuttle will be departing in thirty minutes, ma'am."

She sighed inwardly. A request from humanity's councilor could hardly be ignored, even if the man should have known better than to ask her to set foot on that station again.

"Very well."

* * *

Waking up to the sensation of a heavy weight upon her backside had been disconcerting, but the feeling of strong fingers pressing skillfully into the muscles of her lower back had been enough to make her purr out a rich moan and go limp on the cushioning of the soft bed. After the events of the previous day she should have been sprinting down to engineering to make herself useful, but those four extra digits of his were working some serious magic. If that massage hadn't been enough to start her day off wonderfully, the breakfast of flavorful soup she was brought completely sealed the deal. She had to admit, she'd found herself suspicious, but it didn't stop her from stripping off her suit in the sanitized washroom and getting the water hot enough to make the mirror fog up... after taking a pair of injections and telling her boyfriend to join her in five minutes. And when she felt her back pressed into the shockingly cold metal wall while hot water cascaded down her front and a pair of lips found their way onto her breast, she wondered if she was in what Ashley had called 'heaven' while she uttered a low moan.

_"Joker to Shepard."_

_"Bosh'tet!" _ "Son of a-"

They both growled out the words at the same time before Shepard shook his head and called out. "_What,_ Joker?"

_"Uh... is this a bad time? Sounds like you're in the shower." _Tali tried with limited success to stifle a giggle.

Shepard scowled at the 'Definitely a bad time' he heard muttered over the comm and tried to ignore the soft fingertips that were tracing a dangerous path down his stomach. He failed miserably and squirmed. "You've got five seconds to spit it out, Joker."

_"We'll be docking at the Citadel in an hour, Commander, and Miranda said she needs to discuss a few things with you before we arrive."_

"Noted. Inform her of the following, and keep careful note of it yourself: my omni-tool has the standard scheduling functions that everyone else has. I do not need reminders, and even if I'm late, I'm the commander of this damn ship. My schedule is the only one that matters. You got that?"

_"Uh, yes sir. Joker out."_

When the comm beeped to signal the end of the transmission, Shepard met Tali's intense stare and shrugged. "What?"

"Have I ever mentioned how _exciting_ it is when you take charge like that?"

She purred the words in a way that made his lips curl in a predatory smile and he captured her hands in his, pinning them into the wall above her head. "Good to know," he murmured, pressing up tightly against her and bringing his mouth onto hers in a searing kiss that made her moan and arch her shivering body.

* * *

"Commander, I'm sorry, but I really need that-"

Shepard held out a datapad when his XO smoothly fell into step beside him and she hesitated a moment before taking it. Her brows rose while she read over the updated and approved procurement list and her surprise left a tight smile on his face. Being able to surprise Miranda was just one more benefit of waking at too early an hour, along with preparing soup for his girlfriend and being invited into a very long shower. "If you haven't, solicit ideas from the crew. I didn't have a list of everyone's favorites my first time around. Actually, take Gardner and Kasumi with you. He's the cook, and I bet she hears everything that goes on around here, including culinary preferences." The thought put a hitch in his step and he reminded himself to have Tali Kasumi-proof his cabin door lock.

"Mind if I tag along as well?"

Kelly's voice turned them away from the elevator doors. Shepard didn't miss the frown that manifested itself on Miranda's face for a split second and he hid a wicked grin. "I'm sure they won't object. Right, Miranda?"

"Of course not, Commander." For her part, the XO didn't miss the small, secretive smile on Kelly's face or the tone of her voice, which had been a touch too innocent. Whatever was on the cheerful yeoman's mind, she had a better chance of discovering it with the redhead near at hand.

"Good. Keep track of the evil trio while you're at it. I have a bad feeling about the kind of trouble they're capable of getting into." He grimaced. "Even so, I don't want to be disturbed unless someone ends up shot or in a C-Sec holding cell."

Miranda smirked at that but said nothing, signing off on the pad and reaching for the elevator call button. The doors slid open and she was nearly bowled over by two meters of armored turian. "Damn it, Garrus, please watch-"

"Shepard, can we talk in private?"

Being ignored by the former vigilante put a frown on Miranda's lips but Shepard gave her shoulder a calming pat. "Be back in a few."

As the spectre and his cohort stepped into the elevator, Miranda sighed. Somehow it felt as if this trip to the Citadel was going to be about far more than stocking up on provisions and a family reunion. Especially when Jacob stepped out of the armory with a subdued frown and headed her way.

"Miranda, do you know if Shepard's scheduled that detour out to Aiea yet?"

She couldn't deny that Jacob had been a fine sport about treating the possibility of his father's survival as something other than an immediate priority, but the downtime they had was giving him time to worry about it. She nodded. "It's currently on the itinerary after our departure from the Citadel. The commander hasn't picked a time or a dock to get the new armor installed yet, though."

"One out of two works for me," he said, managing a slight smile. "Have you had a chance to speak with Shepard about doing some surveying? We're going to need more palladium than I thought to get it installed, and I don't think he'll want to pay current market prices for it."

Miranda sighed and added a notation to her checklist. Shepard may have been on the ball this morning, but he didn't have to contend with the mountain of paperwork that hit harder than any krogan.

"That sigh sounded positively stressed. We should go shopping," Kelly proposed brightly from her place at her console.

Jacob's smirk left Normandy's XO resisting the urge to slap the back of his head with her datapad.

* * *

Shepard added an item to his own checklist as he stepped off the elevator onto deck one behind Garrus, making no move to open the cabin door.

"Aren't you going to unlock the door?"

"No."

When Garrus made no veiled joke about Tali and dextro germs, he raised his eyes to see his friend pacing back and forth. Whatever was on his mind, it didn't involve opening a bottle of alcohol. He closed his omni-tool to give his undivided attention.

"Liara forwarded me some information this morning." The turian's voice was grim.

The mention of Liara put a small frown on his lips but also gave him an idea. One that could wait. He leaned against a bulkhead and folded his arms. "About?"

"Sidonis."

That got Shepard's attention. "Did she track him down?"

Garrus' mandibles moved in irritation. "Not quite. She found a lead that led her to a forger on the Citadel. Calls himself 'Fade'. I was hoping..." The conflict must have been evident on his face, because Garrus immediately shook his head. "It can wait a day, if that's what you're worried about. I know Jacob's got something of his own, too, but since we're here..."

"Thanks, I appreciate it. But if you find out it's time sensitive, just let me know. As for Jacob, we work fast. I'm not worried about that." He shot his friend a wry grin. "Actually, I'm just glad Grunt was grown in a tank. I really don't need to be darting around the galaxy to track down some crappy old armor again."

"Heh. Yeah." Garrus nodded, and some of the tension melted away from him. "I appreciate it, Shepard. I owe it to my men to make him pay for stabbing them all in the back."

"As long as you have no doubts, I'm right there with you. And when it's done, we'll open a couple of bottles and toast to your team."

His mood improved, Garrus nodded. "Now that sounds like a better plan than 'oh, by the way, Garrus, you're in charge of this one.'"

Shepard smirked, shrugging. "Yeah, I was astonished when you didn't 'accidentally' mistake Jack for a geth."

"Heh. Now I know the temptation you live with."

* * *

He would have preferred to leave a few of the ground team on the ship, but with his spectre status reinstated, it really wasn't necessary. The hull had been cleansed of Cerberus logos during the installation of the Thanix cannons, thankfully. Learning from their omni-tool recordings that Eclipse had been behind the YMIRs on Daratar still troubled him, but they gave the Citadel a wide berth like the other merc groups and the Illusive Man was investigating that security breach.

Zaaed and Jack were the first ones off the ship with Grunt in tow, a sight that was not particularly comforting. Still, it was better than having the brash young krogan tagging along with him on the Presidium when he wanted some quiet time with his mother. Samara and Thane were already deep in conversation about the Collectors when they exited the airlock, having reviewed the recordings from Horizon over breakfast. Mordin accompanied Chakwas on her way to visit Doctor Michel. Apparently the two human physicians had formed a friendship after the destruction of the SR-1. Miranda and Jacob led Kasumi, Gardner, and Kelly on their errand to restock the Normandy's larders, though the yeoman had another mischievous look on her face when she nodded goodbye to her commander. It was somewhat unsettling. Only a skeleton crew remained aboard, and they would get their turn at shore leave the next day.

With no one left to check off on the crew roster, Shepard sighed and leaned a little harder against the bulkhead by the airlock. He'd been able to keep his mind distracted all morning between work, Garrus, and Tali, but now there was nothing left to do. Nothing except debate just what he was going to say to his mother, and to worry about what he'd find when he saw her. It had been hard enough on her fifteen years ago, even if they had each other and duties aboard ship to keep them busy. She'd received dispensation to bring her teenage son with her and he'd quickly made himself useful by learning and assisting with shipboard tasks with the CO's blessing, even if they were mainly in the galley and damage control. He remembered the pride in her eyes, the smiles she always tried to keep on her lips, but they had been tempered by sadness as the Alliance became his focus instead of the more creative paths he'd bounced between only a year before. Losing his father and sister had been bad enough. He could only imagine what losing the last of her family had done to her.

"Are you sure you want us to come along?"

Joker's uncharacteristically muted voice freed him from his musing and he nodded. "Yeah. She knows who you all are. If she's worried I'm not... me... the three of you being there might help." The unexpected silence made him turn to see Joker staring glumly down at the deck. "What? Are you upset you'll have to hobble a longer distance than from the cockpit to the head?"

His attempt at humor didn't have the effect he'd expected. Joker shook his head. "No, it's the least I can do." He sighed heavily and took a spot against the bulkhead beside his commander. "First you got killed saving my stupid ass, and then I felt too guilty to even write her. I mean, I didn't know if it would hurt more than it would help, but... still."

Shepard didn't know the answer to that either, and he could only shrug. "Don't worry about it, Joker. Writing letters to the families... I don't think I would have done it if I hadn't been the CO. Writing almost fifty of them after Akuze was... well, it was even worse than being there. I was in charge and ended up being the only survivor. 'Hey, I was in command and I got your kid killed while only getting a bit of acid spit on me. Sorry.'" He chuckled humorlessly while Joker shook his head.

"Come on. What the hell were you supposed to do against three thresher maws?"

Shepard gave his pilot a faint smile. "I know, Joker. But that's how it probably sounded to some of the families."

Garrus approached, his customary dry humor back in place, though it sounded a bit strained. No doubt he'd written or had considered writing almost a dozen letters himself. "Aren't you two just filled with joy today?"

"Garrus has a point. Miranda's departed already. There's no one left on board to suck the life out of everything."

Shepard and Joker chuckled, watching Tali walk up with a spring in her step. Apparently she had enjoyed her hour in engineering. Still, her eyes softened behind her visor when she neared and she set a hand on her boyfriend's arm. "Are you okay?"

He smiled faintly and nodded. "I'm all right. I'm just worried about my mother. Let's get going."

He checked the pistol, knife, and shield generator on his belt beneath his jacket before plucking at the high collar. He would have preferred his armor, but Anderson had recommended civilian attire to avoid notice in his brief email notifying him when and where to meet his mother. After the attention he'd received on his last visit to the Citadel, that sounded like a good idea. Armored turians were no strange sight, and Tali couldn't exactly change clothes, but Joker had changed into simple unmarked utilities baggy enough to wear his leg braces beneath them. Garrus led the way out of the airlock with Joker at his side, leaving Tali to fall in step with her quiet lover.

* * *

Hannah Shepard seemed to have aged ten years since he saw her last. Though the wrinkles at her eyes and mouth remained small and her auburn hair had only light streaks of grey, there was a cold hardness in what had been bright blue eyes that once frequently housed a mischievous gleam. She had come to attention and nodded politely to humanity's councilor, but Anderson didn't miss the reluctance and irritation in her stiff posture. At times, when he'd looked out on the Citadel at wreckage of Sovereign that still remained, he'd felt the same. Being aboard a Reaper trap was bad enough without the memories of loss she felt so much more acutely than he. Anderson had been tempted to blurt out the truth but he stuck to his script, apologizing for an unavoidable delay and requesting she meet him in half an hour by the deactivated Conduit near the Presidium Spire. She'd simply nodded curtly and spun about on her heel, all military bearing despite the civilian clothing she wore.

Sighing, Anderson took a familiar position leaning against the balcony railing outside his office while he gazed down at the lake below. It was hard enough for him, being forced to stay away from his protege and one of his only remaining friends while he was forced to deal with Udina and the Council. But he took comfort that the light might soon return to the eyes one of the Alliance's finest captains. After all, she'd helped him do the same for her son years ago. No doubt Shepard could return the favor. Nodding, he allowed himself a smile as he went back to his desk to study the reports Hackett had forwarded by courier on known Cerberus activity.

"That comes out to 65,200 credits."

Miranda initiated the credit transfer, pleased to be spending Shepard's donated money rather than Cerberus'. At first she had debated whether or not to even attempt a discount, but Kelly had the gall to elbow her in the ribs. And it had turned out to be a rather substantial percentage after the two women had turned on the charm and left the young salesman smiling like a fool. That smile had vanished when Miranda had input her key to apply the discount given to one of Cerberus' front companies, cutting a full third off a hundred thousand credit order. After the young clerk had mumbled out a goodbye and a promise to have the provisions delivered to the Normandy's airlock, the two women turned and left.

"That was fun," Kelly said with an impish grin. "Remind me to bring you with me if I ever decide to get an apartment on the Citadel."

Miranda almost sighed when she saw Jacob and Kasumi leading Gardner away toward a small Japanese noodle kiosk. She'd been abandoned. With Kelly. The happy, excitable young thing she'd caught staring at her ass more than once. If they were trying to set her up, she swore she'd go to Shepard and solicit his help with revenge. The man seemed to be holding something over Moreau and Vakarian, after all, and if those two could be kept in check, anyone could. She wasn't aware of the small, wicked grin on her lips until Kelly folded her arms and stepped in front of her, the bubbly smile faded into a knowledgeable smirk. "Let's hear it, Operative Lawson."

_What?_ Miranda's smile vanished and she glared at the redhead. "Hear what?"

Kelly arched a brow. "Whatever has been on your mind since Illium."

Miranda frowned and started walking toward an asari cafe a hundred meters away. "Please do not psychoanalyze me, yeoman. If-"

"The Illusive Man didn't give you an exemption. It's my job." She kept pace with the taller woman's brisk stride effortlessly. "Technically, I'm not required to report unless there's a problem, and there isn't anyone out here recording our conversation. So you have now until the time we return to the ship to spill it."

The operative sighed. Chambers was more intelligent and perceptive than she let on, which was exactly why she had been assigned to the Normandy. And she had a point, as much as it pained her to admit it. "Fine. I'm frustrated that we're shopping on the Citadel while Shepard takes a day off. I'm irritated that the Collector bodies on Horizon all disintegrated and left us with nothing to study. And I'm positively annoyed that we're no closer to knowing how to accomplish our mission." Miranda gave Kelly a sidelong smirk. "Does that about cover it?"

Kelly shrugged, smiling warmly at a turian in passing who gave her an odd look. "Almost. You haven't mentioned your vexation regarding the commander yet."

Miranda grit her teeth and ignored the asari that was giving her a lustful once-over. "I thought that was obvious. In the past few days he's let his personal feelings jeopardize the mission twice. Half the time he shrugs and launches us into combat without a plan. He hates Cerberus, doesn't trust any of us, and switches between hot.. well, warm and cold with me faster than a krogan devours a meal." She led Kelly to a secluded table at the bright cafe and slid into a seat, folding her arms.

"And yet here you are, with some survivors on Horizon, the ground team a dozen strong, and with with nothing worse than a couple of broken bones and a few minor gunshot wounds." Kelly sat and leaned back in her chair, the very picture of relaxation. "Shepard regularly gets his team into and out of tight spots, sometimes through sheer luck, whereas you needed him to pull you out of couple that you got yourself into. You should have known better. Right?"

The psychologist's calm, level voice was irritating, but Miranda knew it was her words that bothered her. True words. She sighed and brushed back a loose strand of hair. "Fine. Yes."

Kelly appeared unperturbed. "As I recall, the Collectors set a trap for Shepard on Horizon and it was Garrus' team that got them out of it. I haven't noticed the commander kicking himself about that."

Miranda shrugged and tapped her fingers on the table, idly wondering where the waitress was. "Why would he? That was Garrus' job, to back up the other teams-" She paused mid sentence for a moment before snapping her mouth shut. _Clever girl._

Kelly smiled and opened a menu. "Now that we've established that neither you or the commander are more perfect than the other, I vote for a sampler platter and some wine. Followed by shopping. And an honest talk with the commander later. Maybe with more wine. We can invite Kasumi."

Miranda allowed herself a smirk, shaking her head. "You have too much time on your hands."

"And you don't take enough for yourself," Kelly retorted. "Everyone needs a day off now and then."

"Fine. I'm sure there's a real bookstore somewhere on this station," Miranda groused, ignoring the amused roll of Kelly's green eyes. If the yeoman suggested lingerie shopping, she'd be reassigned to scrubbing toilets, no matter how insightful she was.

* * *

It was strange to see him so quiet. He was leaning against the railing on the metal path that led by the Conduit beside her, staring down into the water apparently lost in thought or memory. Garrus and Joker talked quietly thirty meters away, seated on a bench in the grass. It was an idyllic setting, one she had always enjoyed. She hoped that in an hour, they'd all be sitting at a table in Flux, laughing and trading stories about a young Shepard or some of the more enjoyable memories from the original Normandy. The thought put a smile on her lips and she reached out to gently caress her boyfriend's arm, earning a warm look from azure eyes before he returned to his silent musing, though he took her hand in his and clasped them together on the railing as he stared at the Conduit.

Tali caught movement out of the corner of her eye a minute later and turned her head to see a human woman with reddish brown hair in a long charcoal skirt and a black blouse approaching. That was an odd sight, considering how long asari-inspired dresses seemed to almost be a uniform for human women on the Presidium. The colors she wore were as uninviting as the hard look in her blue eyes and the rigidity of her bearing. Still, she seemed familiar, vibrant music coming to mind. Tali looked a bit closer at the eyes that were locked cautiously on her before gasping under her breath. The rigid bearing, the light blue eyes, the familiarity of her...

When the woman gave her a curt nod and turned to stare out over the water ten meters away, Tali squeezed Shepard's hand lightly. He lifted his head to meet her eyes and she stepped aside to reveal what lie behind her. It was his turn to tense with surprise, his hand tightening in hers. He stared at his mother for a few quiet moments and Tali didn't miss the flash of sadness in his eyes before he broke the silence with a low murmur. "I've never seen her look so... shut down. Not even after Mindoir."

Tali nudged him gently with her elbow and gave him a smile she knew he recognized even through the visor. "Go on. I'm sure I'm not the only woman you're good at cheering up."

He nodded slowly and slipped his hand from hers, taking a cautious step forward. Tali watched as he squared his broad shoulders, lightly tugged the hem of his jacket down, and walked forward with the determination he always managed to summon from somewhere.

* * *

Quarians were an unusual sight on the Citadel, especially on the Presidium, though Hannah knew better than to assume the female in the lavender-accented suit would be wandering by to pick her pocket. The quarian's suit seemed somewhat familiar, but it was rather well-made and subtly ornamented. If there was such a thing as a rich quarian, she was likely one of them, and certainly not a thief. But she had felt a strange unease when she'd gazed at the silver eyes behind the purple visor. Shaking it off and staring out at the water, she let her mind slip back into the memories of the letters her son had written her over the months of pursuing Saren. She remembered the reassurance she'd felt when he'd described how Kaidan kept him company on sleepless nights, a role the lieutenant had begun to share with the quarian engineer who'd volunteered to postpone her Pilgrimage just to help the Normandy and her crew. Out of all of them, only she had ever communicated, a wordless gift that reassured her that her son had spent his last days content and in the presence of friends. She'd thought about responding, of asking for stories about him, but had never worked up the courage to have her emotions once more ripped free of their imprisonment.

"If you find any fish in that lake, I know a couple of hungry krogan."

So deep was she in her thoughts that she failed to notice the quiet presence behind her until the man spoke. She flinched at the first sound of the deep voice but a scowl quickly curled her lips while she forced herself to relax. She was in no mood to be hit on by some bored diplomat. The man's voice was familiar, however, bringing to mind the first news report she'd heard upon debarking her ship, one that no longer filled her with hope but stabbed her in the gut like an icy blade. _"Witnesses report seeing Commander Shepard alive on Omega and the Citadel, but is there any truth to it? Tune in at 1900..."_

Blinking back an angry tear, Hannah shook her head. "I'm meeting someone, so please leave me be."

"I know. Anderson can't make it. You'll have to settle for me, sorry."

Hannah felt a inexplicable chill run down her spine, her breath catching in her throat. It took her a moment to swallow and summon the nerve to turn, but she only got as far as the quarian off to the side, who was watching her intently while gloved fingers twisted nervously at her waist. _You'd like Tali. She's a sweet girl, reminds me a lot of Haley. Brave and brilliant, though, and she breaks the tension in the Mako with humor even while she's wringing her hands nervously and muttering about my driving under her breath._

Over the quarian's shoulder she saw a bearded human wearing a ball cap and a turian armored in blue staring at her from their spot on a bench. _You should hear Garrus and Joker bitching at each other, fighting over who contributed more to the Normandy's design; us, or the turians. I swear, those two have what you could almost call a sibling rivalry. Makes poker night... exciting. Great jokes, though._

Hannah felt her hands trembling on the railing as it all hit her at once. Anderson had set her up to meet the Normandy's old crew. But... who was behind her? Swallowing again, she tried to turn to see the figure in her peripheral vision, but her muscles and her nerve betrayed her. It felt as if her heart stopped when the man took a few steps into her line of sight, giving her a glimpse of broad shoulders, stubble on a strong jaw, thin scars in a strange pattern on his cheek, and... familiar azure eyes.

"My mother, at a loss for words. Now I've seen everything."

The soft, sad smile that accompanied those murmured words broke her.

* * *

Tali watched while Hannah's rigid form and face seemed to shatter and the woman collapsed into her son's arms, choked sobs already racking her frame while she buried her face into black wool. Shepard's appearance on Freedom's Progress a few weeks prior had been a shock. She could only imagine how much more overwhelming it was for a mother who'd lost both of her children. Blinking a tear from her eye, Tali smiled and turned to walk over to Garrus and Joker to let mother and son have their privacy.

"Well. Guess our job is done, since she hasn't tried to shoot him or anything." Despite the humor, Joker's voice was unusually subdued, and both he and Garrus were watching the reunion somberly. Not for the first time Tali wondered if there was a member of the former crew that didn't have some sort of issue with at least one of their parents. Shepard, herself, Joker, Ashley, and Liara had all lost one. Wrex had killed his father and Liara helped kill her mother. Now it seemed Garrus had something on his mind as well. She made a note to ask him about it later in private. And to message her father.

"Well, she _is_ a Shepard. You never know," Garrus deadpanned. Tali and Joker chuckled softly, watching while their friend gently rocked his weeping mother from side to side, a bittersweet smile on his lips. "She looked familiar for a moment there, but I can't remember ever seeing a picture of her."

"I know," Tali replied, pondering that as well for a moment. "What's that human expression? 'On the tip of your tongue'?"

"Yeah," Joker answered quietly, watching as Captain Shepard's head finally lifted.

* * *

He'd met the former captain of the Einstein once while on Arcturus, and Admiral Sengupta had told him about the day Mindoir had been attacked from his own perspective. His mother had been the officer of the deck when the distress call was received, and though her face had been ashen and her body stiff, she'd summoned the senior officers and relayed all the pertinent information with deadly calm. Despite her easygoing, mischievous exterior, she was all steel on the inside. Or at least, she had been, even when finding her hollow-eyed son at the side of a marine lieutenant where they stood watch over the bodies of her husband and daughter in silence.

This was a side of his mother he had never seen before, and though it pained him to see her so completely overwhelmed, he couldn't help but smile while he held her tightly in his arms. It was his turn to be there while she cried out her pain. How much time had passed with her tears soaking his chest, he couldn't say. And it hardly mattered.

When her sobs changed into hoarse, shuddering intakes of breath he ceased stroking her hair and allowed her to tilt her head up. Seeing her eyes red and puffy and rimmed with tears, her cheeks streaked, throat swallowing painfully, he smiled gently. Wiping a droplet off her cheek with a thumb, he shook his head. "It's a good thing you're off alone on shore leave. You'd ruin the reputation of the Shepard clan if any of your crew saw you."

She did not laugh. Instead, she shook her head slowly and forced a hoarse whisper past the lump in her throat. "Two years. Two years, and not even a _word?_ How could you? I don't give a damn how secret whatever mission you've been on is. You could have told me." Her voice was weak and defeated, and there was only one word that described the expression on her haunted face: betrayed. It struck him like a punch in the gut. His mother, who had survived the loss of her husband and daughter and her son's youthful innocence, had finally found her breaking point.

He felt drained, his stomach clenched in a cold knot. He raised his gaze past her to Tali's gleaming eyes, ever his source of calm and reassurance, but he was unable to keep his own from drifting to his helmsman.

For the first time, he wished he had left Joker to die on that bridge.

* * *

Shepard and Miranda had strongly suggested that no one leave the nicer end of Zakera Ward, but Jack and Zaeed had other ideas in mind, leaving Grunt to follow along reluctantly. Though the more affluent end was dull and the suggestion hadn't quite had the weight of an order, he felt uneasy as they approached the loud club. Bright neon lights cast the moving crowd in alternating shadow and light, an intriguing form of chaos, and the bass stirred at something primal inside him. Grunt clenched his fists and stared at the bouncer. Elcor. An immensely strong quadrupedal race from a high-gravity world, but not one bred for war. Still, the young krogan wondered what kind of opponents they would make. Okeer had not included any imprints about the slow-talking, heavily muscled species. He took a step toward the alien but stopped, blinking and forcing his hands to relax. Starting an unprovoked fight would only draw the attention of C-Sec and put him firmly over the line they were already nearly crossing, no doubt drawing Shepard's anger.

"Hey, pup!" Zaeed's voice drew his attention. Grunt looked over to see Jack folding her arms and tapping her foot impatiently while the mercenary stared at him. "The half-naked women and liquor are inside, not out here." Zaeed turned to Jack with a wicked grin. "Present company excepted. Come on."

Grunt nodded slowly and followed, glancing over at the elcor for a moment. Something strange had just happened, but he wasn't sure what. Maybe some ryncol would clarify things. He rubbed idly at a small itch on his developing brow plate.

* * *

"Why didn't you tell me?"

His mother's listless murmur broke him from his staring at Joker, who had begun to squirm uneasily in his seat with guilt clearly plastered on his ashen face. Shepard sighed and released his mother from his embrace, taking a step back to lean against the railing and running a hand back through his hair. Joker had been the first one to support him when he'd been given command of the original Normandy. He'd done the same when they were departing Virmire with Kaidan left behind as nothing more than scattered atoms. He'd made an impossible Mako drop onto Ilos. He'd led the Alliance charge during the battle against Sovereign. He'd maneuvered the Normandy to keep it between the escape shuttles and the Collector dreadnought. It was easy to forget that when the man was cooing over leather seats and making jokes. Shepard raised his head and gave Joker a brief smile, pleased to see that it was returned, albeit uneasily. He would talk about his sudden anger with Tali later. Now came the more difficult part, the one that couldn't be solved with a beer, a few minutes of serious words, and some jokes.

He pushed off the railing and took his mother's hand in his, setting his jaw and meeting her tormented gaze. "I couldn't tell you because I wasn't even conscious." He led the way toward his friends and the grass, hoping the walk and a seat might make things easier. He could feel her eyes on him, no doubt narrowed in puzzlement.

"You... were unconscious? For two years?" she asked with a touch of suspicious anger in her voice.

"Technically? Yes." He waved for his friends to stay seated and led his mother toward a nearby tree, helping her down onto the grass to lean against the trunk. While she smoothed her skirt he folded his arms and glanced over at Joker and Tali with a faint smile. "I suppose I'm a zombie."

Hannah's patience was apparently at the breaking point and she shook her head irritably with a flick of an auburn ponytail. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Rather than flinch, he felt a bit of warmth that some of the fire was back in her voice. "Well, I suppose not a zombie, since they're brought to life with magic. In my case, it was two years' worth of experimental procedures and ten kilos of tech." Turning, he saw his mother staring at him with a dangerous impatience in her eyes. He ignored the implied threat. "Apparently when you asphyxiate in vacuum, nearly burn up in the atmosphere, and slam into a snowdrift at terminal velocity, you get pretty banged up."

Hannah practically leaped to her feet, advancing on him with fire in her eyes and clenched fists. "Don't you dare try to bullshit me, A-"

"I was dead." He dropped the levity and fixed her with a hard stare that made her draw up short and blink. "It took two years to put me back together." He grabbed his sleeve and pulled it up to his elbow to reveal smooth skin over his forearm where there had previously been evidence of his exposure to thresher maw acid. "My skin? It's all new, as far as I can tell." He pointed up at the healing scars on his left cheek, then up at the branches and leaves over their heads. "They had to grow new organs, and I was exposed to a lot of eezo when the drive core exploded." He pushed his open palm up in a blue glow and the branches suddenly jolted in an explosion of leaves that slowly rained down on them.

His mother was staring at him in... shock? Horror? He couldn't tell, and the uncertainty chilled him. He swallowed and gazed over at Tali and the gleaming eyes that narrowed slightly in what he knew was a smile, and a beautiful one. He had to admit, it had been reassuring to see the thin lines of Tali's own cybernetic implants when he'd first undressed her. It was hard to feel like a monster when tech helped keep the woman he loved alive.

* * *

_Dead? That's impossible._

_ Your son survived Mindoir, Akuze and Elysium. He's the first human spectre. He chased a disgraced one all the way to Ilos and took a Mako through a Prothean-built mass relay. Does 'impossible' mean a damn thing to him?_

Hannah's mind fell into stunned silence and she slowly backed up to lean heavily against the tree while she watched a warm smile curve her son's lips. Aside from the three scars on his lip being replaced by some on his cheek, he looked no different than the last time she saw him. There had been something in his eyes a moment ago that reminded her of the weight on his shoulders following the battle with Sovereign, but it was curently gone, and he looked just as he had when she'd seen him shortly before the Normandy was commissioned. Following his gaze, she saw Garrus and Joker looking awkwardly out over the Presidium lake, but Tali was staring right back at her son, the picture of serenity.

At least one person had no doubts about him, but it wasn't his own mother. Hannah blinked at that realization. When had she ever doubted her son before? Anyone who ever had was proven wrong. A psychiatrist she knew hadn't expected him to recover from Mindoir and Akuze. Alliance brass had been skeptical about posting him as XO of their experimental warship. The council and that bastard Udina hadn't believed his story about Saren. A damned sapient dreadnought had mocked him, and it was in pieces.

"The galaxy has a sick sense of humor," she murmured, feeling fresh tears brimming in her eyes while she buried her face in her hands.

"So do I," she heard her son reply, his voice soft but amused while he took one of her hands in his and led her toward the bench. "Garrus, Joker, why don't you two go stop a hanar from proselytizing or something?"

Hannah chuckled weakly and opened her eyes, remembering that particular story. "Big, stupid jellyfish," she muttered, drawing a laugh from Garrus and a small grin from Joker while they rose.

"Your son is more persuasive than we are. Just ask Tali. But we'll try our best."

Hannah noticed her son glaring at Garrus, but the turian was already departing quickly, practically dragging Joker along with him.

"_Bosh'tet,_" she heard Tali mutter, and she looked over to see fingers clasped and writhing on the quarian's lap. Clearly she was missing something, but her head was beginning to throb and her throat still ached. Letting her son guide her to a seat on the bench, she rubbed her temples and closed her eyes.

"Garrus, I'll make you a deal. You bring us back some levo and dextro fruit juice and a painkiller for my mother or I won't pull my punches next time. Oh, and don't forget that threat I made in my cabin, either."

She heard the turian sigh over her son's omni-tool. _"Agreed. When you help me on that other matter, I'll swear to end the harassment."_

"You'll stop now or I'll beat you over the head with your own rifle _and _hack your visor to play vorcha pornography," Tali growled. Hannah couldn't help but laugh despite her tightened throat at the banter, finally feeling her lips tugging up into a smile.

_"Ouch. First hanar and now vorcha? Y__ou're really getting nasty. Shepard's a bad influence on you."_

"Keep it up, Garrus, and I'll add elcor to that list."

The mischief in her son's voice was so familiar. Opening her eyes, she saw him grinning down at her.

_"All right, fine. But if you try to make me sit through their adaptation of your Shakespeare, all bets are off."_

"Amusedly: you don't stand a chance against me." Her son droned out the words in a deep monotone before closing the channel. The sound of him impersonating an elcor was too much. Hannah started laughing and before she knew it, she was nearly doubled over and clutching at her stomach while a strong hand patted her back.

* * *

Loud clubs with flashing lights weren't usually his style. Zaeed preferred to drink alone or in small groups of trusted colleagues, not in crowds where one couldn't hear someone sneaking up from behind with a knife. Jack, on the other hand, seemed to prefer to do her drinking with others, and the energy of the club put a wicked gleam in her eyes. Glancing back at Grunt, he snickered. The young krogan was completely out of place in a club mostly filled with humans. Shin Akiba was a human-dominated district of the ward, after all. Still, the pup was lightly nudging people aside instead of lowering his shoulder and ramming through them. Maybe it was a learning experience for the naïve krogan.

"Damn, you and the krogan are slow. Get moving already!" Jack punched the back of a pauldron to urge him toward the bar and shot Grunt a glare. Zaeed only chuckled, but Grunt gave her a wicked grin and stepped up, looming over her and showing his teeth.

"Which of us did Shepard bring with him on Haestrom?"

Jack smirked and folded her arms. "The only one he could find that was stupid enough to follow him. Didn't hurt that you were a walking bullet sponge, either."

Grunt growled. "Watch it, human. I'm a krogan warrior, not a decoy."

"Is your pet krogan giving you trouble?"

The trio turned to see two human men leering at Jack with grins on their lips and alcohol on their breath. Grunt moved instinctively to stand between the female and the intruders but Jack rolled her eyes and slipped to his side, glaring at the men. "If you don't want your teeth rammed down your throat, you should leave. Now."

One swallowed nervously and his smile vanished, but the other only smirked and ran his gaze down Jack's tattooed torso and the thin straps she wore. "What's the matter? You got a thing for giant reptiles?"

Zaeed chortled at the stupidity of the drunk and moved to lean back against a wall, preparing for the show. Grunt's eyes narrowed dangerously and his fingers curled into fists, but Jack grinned wickedly and lunged forward, slamming her knee into an unprotected groin.

* * *

After almost two minutes, Tali was worried. Hannah was still laughing, gasping for breath with a red face while she clutched at her ribs as if in pain. Shepard didn't seem concerned, though. He was _grinning_. That same crooked little amused expression he had when he was climbing over a piece of Sovereign after emerging from the rubble. At the time, when she'd gotten over her joyous shock, she'd thought him insane. Apparently it was hereditary, or a human response to grief that had turned into joy. Sometimes, humans were truly baffling.

Shepard's omni-tool started beeping furiously at him, ending his levity. With a growl he opened the comm. "_What?"_

_"Shepard, there is a problem. I am reading significantly elevated levels of adrenaline from Jack and Grunt, along with an accelerated heart rate." _Simulated inflection or not, EDI was not terribly clear.

"Keelah, _please_ tell me you're trying to say that they're fighting," Tali muttered. The alternative was unthinkable.

_"That is the most likely scenario. Zaeed's vital signs are somewhat elevated as well."_

While Hannah tried to catch her breath and looked on in concern, her son shook his head. "Idiots. Send me the current map and include the locations of the squad." When the hologram of the Citadel sprang to life he took a few seconds to examine it before nodding, apparently satisfied. He tapped a key. "Shepard to Samara. Grunt, Jack, and Zaeed are involved in some trouble in the 1300 block of Shin Akiba. Can you go break it up and get them out of there before C-Sec shoots them? I'm all the way over on the Presidium."

Tali raised her brows at the amusement in Samara's voice. _"Of course, commander. Thane and I thought it wise to stay close to them, in fact. We will contact you if we require your assistance."_

"Thanks. Shepard out." He closed the channel and sighed, rubbing his temples. "I should have known better than to let a baby krogan hang out with an insane biotic powerhouse and a sociopath."

"What?"

Hannah's alarmed inquiry made Tali wince. She'd forgotten that they'd have to explain just who was providing the ship and funding for their mission.

* * *

Though the drell's breathing had a faint rasp to it, he ran alongside her with an easy grace in long strides through the dim orange glow of Shin Akiba's narrow streets. Samara was aware that he was an assassin, but with her oath swearing her to Shepard's mission she saw no need to delve into his past. That was fortunate, for she had been impressed by the recording from his entrance in the Dantius Towers. "Shepard did not sound terribly surprised when he informed us of the trouble. I am unsure how to take that."

Thane only shrugged and vaulted a keeper that had skittered into his path. "I would surmise that chaos is closer to a fact of life than an exception on the Normandy. The ground team is rather... diverse."

Samara nodded her agreement as they rounded a corner and entered a busy thoroughfare. Across the street people were streaming out of a building illuminated in garish neon. Judging by the azure flashes that lit the doorway from within, Jack was hard at work. Samara and Thane sprinted inside, dodging nimbly past panicked citizens, until they entered the main hall. What they saw made Samara shake her head. "It seems I was right." Chaos, indeed.

Between flashes of a strobe they could see twenty or so humans swarming around Jack, Zaeed, and Grunt, with a few turians, two krogan, and an elcor mixed in. An explosion of blue from one of Jack's shockwaves sent four humans flying and six others were bowled aside when Grunt roared and threw a turian into the crowd. Others immediately pounced on him, but the young krogan roared and waded into them with swinging fists and mighty headbutts. Zaeed was doing nothing more than sipping whisky on a stool at the bar, though he lashed out mid-sip with an empty bottle and knocked an approaching young man out cold before calmly returning to his drink.

Jack was holding her own with biotically charged punches and shockwaves, but Samara could tell she was tiring quickly. Her power was very impressive, but she needed conditioning. And assistance, as their krogan opponent was coming up behind her. She readied her self to issue a biotic throw, but when Thane came sprinting out of the shadows she held up. Samara watched as the drell spun and slammed his foot into the krogan's throat, following it with two hard punches to the side of his neck and multiple kicks to the stomach. The krogan doubled over but immediately went into a partial backflip when Thane slammed him with biotic force.

Impressed, Samara waded calmly into the crowd, catching two punches thrown at her with biotically enhanced strength. A hard kick sent one opponent sprawling onto the ground and she launched the other into the wall with a blast of force. Feeling another behind her, she spun and erected a barrier just in time for it to stop a bar stool. Its wielded paused in shock but quickly found himself hauled into the air by two powerful krogan arms. Grunt roared and charged back into the fray, using the man as a battering ram. A few humans were slammed aside, another was knocked to the ground, and the remaining turian found himself bounced off the wall before falling unconscious to the floor.

Samara watched most of their opponents scramble to their feet and flee for the exit. The elcor had apparently withdrawn itself from the melee, standing off to the side by the bar, but when Grunt dropped his improvised battering ram he turned toward it, chest heaving and eyes narrowing. Jack grinned wickedly and leaned back against the wall beside Zaeed to watch the show. But the fight was over. Samara walked toward Grunt, biotics flaring, and Thane did the same from the other side.

"Grunt! Shepard has ordered me to escort the three of you out before Citadel Security arrives."

His icy blue eyes turned toward her and narrowed ominously, but their focus shifted to a place behind her and he snorted. "Too late."

"Hold it! You're all under arrest!"

Samara sighed quietly. Twice in two days would test the limits of even her patience.


	26. Anger

When the images of the other three councilors faded away, David Anderson sighed and shook his head, turning to see Ashley Williams scowling with fists clenched at her sides.

"Now I know how Shepard feels," she muttered, turning to limp toward the balcony and folding her arms. "Thousands missing, eyewitness accounts, my omni-tool data, and they still think that damn glowing Collector was just some genetic freak and not a Reaper puppet. God, didn't they _listen_ to what it was saying? It talked just like Sovereign!" Whirling around, she glared at the inactive holographic projectors, and Anderson had the sense that she was resisting the urge to put a few rounds through the equipment.

"Maybe we shouldn't have bothered," Anderson reluctantly admitted, walking to a table and pulling out a chair. "Sit down, Lieutenant. The last thing you need is to trip and screw up your knee, too." He dropped into another seat and rubbed his weathered face with his palms, exhaling heavily while Ashley reluctantly limped over and sat.

"You know, I'll admit Shepard had a point about humanity needing to cooperate with the other species, but the Council's definition of 'cooperate' is 'do what we say and shut up'". Ashley glowered down at the table and slowly flexed her foot, ignoring the ache in the knitted bones above it.

"It could be worse."

"Yeah, Shepard could still be dead instead of out there in the Normandy's big brother hunting those bastards down," Ash muttered. "Are you sure the Alliance can't do anything, sir?"

Anderson exhaled a resigned sigh. "Hackett believes us, and he tried to get a couple of flotillas into the Terminus to serve as a quick reaction force, but Alliance command shot him down."

Ashley nodded dully and turned to stare out at the Presidium. It was the very picture of serenity and galactic progress, but she knew what dark secrets were concealed behind the veneer of civilization. "Figures, doesn't it, sir? First they don't believe us and an armada comes knocking on their door. Now there's another one knocking, but just because it's not _their_ door, they won't grab their gun. But Cerberus did." She shook her head with a scowl. "I still can't believe it. Shepard working with_ Cerberus? _Thank God Garrus, Joker, and Chakwas are with him." Her brown eyes unfocused while she stared off at the wall, frowning. "No offense, sir, but I kinda wish I'd just sent you my report and gone with them. Maybe I could shoot Collectors _and_ stab Cerberus in the back."

"None taken, Lieutenant." Anderson stared at the wall with her in silence for a few minutes before his omni-tool beeped at him. Checking it, he sighed. Another damn meeting. At least he could give Williams some good news. "The Normandy docked this morning. You should go spend some time with old friends. Check the Conduit."

He had the satisfaction of seeing her mood brighten immediately and she rose to her feet, saluting. "Aye aye, sir."

* * *

Shepard sighed and rubbed his temples after receiving an abbreviated report from Samara. "Figures. It's a good thing there's no law enforcement on Omega or I'm sure we would have had to deal with them, too. What the hell did those three do?" He glanced over at Tali and wondered if there was a faint glimmer of amusement in the silver spots of light behind the purple glass that concealed her beautiful face.

_"If what Jack says is true-"_

_ "Screw you!"_ he heard the bald woman snarl in the background. This time, he was certain he heard Tali utter a muffled snicker. When he glared at her, she turned away and pretended to admire the krogan statue down the lake. That drew a quiet laugh from his mother, who in turn received a stare of her own. Those two women were going to be the death of him.

_"-she disabled a drunken man who was antagonizing her and a melee broke out. There are no fatalities, and no injuries among any of us, but there is some minor damage to the club."_

One good thing about this situation was that Samara and Thane were there to offset the volatile trio of Jack, Zaeed, and Grunt. He snorted at the thought. An assassin and a justicar... _Hmm._ An idea came to him.

"Samara, hold on. I'll get back to you in a minute."

_"Understood."_

He envied her calm while he fought his own frustration, jabbing away at his omni-tool's keyboard until he got to the database he was looking for. Entering his spectre authorization code, he began searching through it. Slowly.

"Keelah, I'd hoped you'd gotten better at using an omni-tool," Tali teased. "No wonder Garrus didn't let you install that thruster on our shuttle."

"Quiet, you." Shepard poked her side beneath her lowest rib, drawing a yelp from her lips while she jumped. He smirked victoriously. The discovery of that particular sensitive spot had been good for a moment's amusement until she had growled, flipped him onto his back, and pinned him down.

"That's no way to treat a lady, young man," his mother admonished sternly. He wasn't fooled, though. He heard the amusement in her voice, and it made him smile.

"You're right. I'll give you another backrub later, Tali." He didn't take his eyes off the data scrolling by but he sensed her tense and could feel his mother eying him. Probably with suspicion. _Aha._ He opened the C-Sec directory and tapped a name, waiting for the comm link to connect. A moment later a holographic screen popped up to reveal the grumpy face of Commander Bailey.

_"What!? ...Oh, Shepard. I'll be damned. You need something?"_

"Actually, yes. I've got a few crew members down at the Indigo Club in Shin Akiba that are under arrest for a bar fight."

Bailey sighed. _"Damn it. Let me guess: you want me to tell my people to let them go?"_

It had been a tempting idea. As a Spectre, he could tell even the Executor to let them go and it would be done. It would, however, likely reach the ears of the council, who had virtually banished him to the Terminus Systems. Better to play it safe. He shook his head. "Not quite. One of them is a justicar, and-"

_"Damn, how'd you pull that off?"_

"Long story. Your immediate superior is asari, right? Samara will attest that she broke up a simple bar fight without fatalities, I'll cover the damage to the bar, and in your report you can accept the word of the justicar and give your boss a good impression of your cultural sensitivity and all that."

Bailey stared at him through the viewscreen for a moment, brows raised thoughtfully before he shook his head. _"It might work, but I hate playing politics."_

Shepard shrugged. "Who knows, maybe your racial tolerance and respect for asari culture will get you a date."

Bailey smirked and folded his arms. _"Funny, Shepard. Fine, tell your justicar to have __the officer contact me. I'll get it sorted out. Bailey out."_

When the screen vanished, Shepard smiled with satisfaction. That had been surprisingly easy. Turning, he saw his mother regarding him curiously, some of that familiar sparkle returned to her eyes. "What?"

Hannah smirked. "Oh, I'm just looking forward to grilling you on all the little mysteries I keep getting hints of."

"Plenty of them, that's for sure. Tali, why don't you tell my mother about Mordin?"

He slipped off the bench just in time to avoid a two-knuckled punch aimed at his ribs, laughing and reopening comms with Samara while silver eyes glared at him.

* * *

Two minutes later, Tali was fighting sudden panic while her boyfriend stormed off, muttering about nothing being easy and turian C-Sec officers with sticks and rulebooks lodged up their asses. She followed him with her eyes until he rounded a corner and out of sight, but then she became aware of another pair of eyes, focused on her. Turning her head slowly, she saw Hannah Shepard regarding her intently. She swallowed and clasped her hands on her lap.

"So..."

"I really should wait and drag the story out of my son, but I've moved past 'shocked' and 'weepy' and into 'impatient'. What happened to him?" Though Hannah's blue eyes had acquired a warmth that had been missing an hour before and her voice was soft, there was some familiar iron in her that made Tali wonder whether it was an inherited Shepard trait. And she found herself wondering if she had bitten off more than she could chew when she became the girlfriend of humanity's first spectre.

"Well, it's a long story and even I don't know all of it." Tali looked down at her lap and found her fingers were already writhing nervously. _Damn it! Stop that!_ She quickly folded her arms, oblivious to the tapping of her foot until Hannah suddenly smiled softly.

"Sorry. Sometimes the mother and the captain sides both come out at once." Hannah relaxed back into the bench and took a calming breath before continuing. "I don't think I ever thanked you for that recording and the messages you sent me. I'm sorry."

Thankful for the delay in having to spill the details on Cerberus, the few weeks her son had been alive without contacting his mother, and the fact she was sleeping with him, Tali breathed a quiet sigh of relief. "It's okay. I wasn't sure... I thought maybe it would just open up old wounds, but..."

Hannah's face darkened. "Trust me, wounds like that don't close. But it helped. Thank you." Tali nodded and they sat in an awkward silence for a moment. "Okay, I'll _try_ being patient, but at least tell me what he's been doing since he... woke up?"

_Oh, keelah. Here we go._ Tali summoned her courage and met Hannah's gaze. "Well, less than twelve hours after waking up he was on Freedom's Progress saving my life."

Cobalt eyes blinked and then narrowed. "He... woke up after two years and immediately went looking for you on a deserted colony?"

"No!" Tali blurted out, fighting the urge to start squirming. "He was investigating the disappearances and I was there to retrieve one of my people who was there on Pilgrimage, but..." Hannah was still staring and it was impossible to tell if it was interest, suspicion, or disbelief. _Oh, keelah._ Tali sighed. "Okay, so _every_ story about your son is a long one. Let me start over."

* * *

He shouldn't have been surprised, really. It had only been two years since he had left C-Sec, and the Presidium had been his beat as a patrol officer before he'd advanced to detective. He hadn't dreaded meeting old colleagues, but did the first one to recognize him _really _have to be Brigitte Leclair?

"Garrus!" the voice repeated again. Beside him, Joker glanced back over his shoulder.

"Hey, Garrus, I don't know if you noticed, but there's an attractive woman calling your name. Wait, what am I saying? Of course you wouldn't notice. She doesn't have a barrel or accept heatsinks."

He opened his mouth to retort, but the woman called his name again, this time from only meters away. Biting back a sigh, Garrus stopped and turned to see the beaming brunette approaching. Why the human woman found him so fascinating was a mystery he'd never solved. "Hello, Brigitte. How have you been?"

If the willowy C-Sec officer was insulted that he'd taken so long to hear her, or clued in to the fact that Joker was giving her his best smile, she didn't show it. "I've been great! It's been so long since you left, I started wondering if I would ever see you again. What have you been doing? You never replied to any of my messages." The sad pout that replaced her winning smile made Joker's heart skip a beat, but Garrus just shifted awkwardly.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I kind of threw myself into another job."

Her pout vanished, replaced by shock as she reached up toward the bandage on the side of his face. "Mon dieu, Garrus! What happened to you?"

Joker sighed and shook his head, turning to limp off. Why the emotionally stunted dextro-DNA turian had gorgeous French women taking an interest in him, he'd never understand.

When Joker wandered off, Garrus nearly cursed at his back for leaving him alone with the excitable woman. "Oh, I got a little too close to a rocket. Long story. Weren't you transferred to Tayseri Ward?"

Brigitte withdrew her hand and shook her head. "They changed my reassignment to Zakera Ward after the attack. E-Crimes. I'm just on loan to the Presidium for a diplomatic conference."

The mention of E-Crimes drew Garrus' attention. "Really? Have you heard of a forger named 'Fade'?"

* * *

Tali's fidgeting would have been quite endearing if her flustered state hadn't left her continually backtracking and clarifying. Hannah had the feeling the story was somewhat edited, but the poor girl seemed far too sweet to be lying outright. From the awed way Tali described how her son had taken out two heavy mechs and helped her patch up the quarian wounded, curiosity began to set in. By the time the story reached the Migrant Fleet, Hannah was downright suspicious, but she was smiling.

"Wow. Is every day of his that... exciting?"

Tali's head tilted contemplatively before she shrugged. "Or close to it. Keelah, just a few days ago he and his squad fought an entire prison full of murderers and were on their way to stop the Collectors on Horizon just a few hours later. And then yesterday-"

"Wait." Something had been nagging her about the mention of Freedom's Progress, but it was Horizon that made it click. The former had gone silent weeks ago. "When were you on Freedom's Progress?" When she saw Tali stiffen Hannah knew she wasn't going to like the answer.

"Almost three weeks ago."

Hannah's jaw dropped, but an angry flush quickly colored her skin. "Three _weeks_!?" she exclaimed, rocketing to her feet. "He's been awake three weeks and didn't message me?! That miserable... I'm going to kill him! How the hell could he!" She turned her ire on Tali, glaring down at the uncomfortable quarian. "He may be a self-absorbed jackass but why didn't you or any of the others make him-"

Tali suddenly came to her feet, silver eyes narrowing behind purple glass. "Sit down and shut up and maybe I'll tell you!" Hannah blinked hard, stunned into silence. Being yelled at by a quarian quivering in anger instead of anxiety was unexpected, to say the least. "Good, you know how to shut up. Now sit down!" Hannah wasn't sure why, but she obeyed, and Tali's glare kept her in place. "First of all, Shepard woke up from being _dead!_ Second, he had to deal with the fact that it was _Cerberus_ who saved him, not the Alliance or the Council."

_Cerberus...? What?_

Her dismay must have been evident on her face, because Tali nodded firmly and kept on going. "That's right. The same people who killed Admiral Kahoku and your son's entire platoon were the ones who brought him back. How do you think _he_ feels about that? Oh, and do you know how many times my heart felt like it was crushed all over again when I heard some false rumor on the news saying he was alive? Didn't you feel the same? Would you have believed it if he wasn't standing right in front of you? I wouldn't have!"

"I... no. But-"

Tali didn't relent. "But what? But he's still a self-absorbed jackass, even when he brought his friends to make sure you wouldn't have doubts that he is who he says he is?" Tali huffed. "He was so worried about you and it broke his heart to see you so sad before he walked over. He has a hundred things on his mind and millions of lives to worry about, but he made the time to come do this. I know you're overwhelmed, but don't you dare insult him again, you self-absorbed _bosh'tet._"

A dozen meters away, a shocked Jeff Moreau failed to notice that he'd dropped the bag of drinks, so stunned was he by the sight of a quarian shouting down an Alliance captain, and Commander Fucking Shepard's _mother_, at that. Who was currently slumped in her seat, head bowed while a tear trickled down her cheek.

_God, remind me __**never**__ to piss Tali off again._

When Tali sat back down and pulled a sniffling Hannah Shepard into a tight hug, though, he nearly laughed. Any woman who could handle a Shepard like that was a force to be reckoned with. He wondered if his commander knew what he was in for.

* * *

'Expect the unexpected' was a cliché, but certainly true enough. Shepard had a feeling Miranda enjoyed being the unexpected, and the wry smirk she shot at him from beside the nightclub entrance made it clear his surprise was evident on his face. "Miranda? What are you doing here?"

"EDI told me you were coming down here to clean up their mess, and you _did_ tell me to keep track of them."

"Great job," he teased, earning a roll of pale blue eyes while they headed toward the doors. "Citadel fashions weren't as interesting as you'd hoped this year?"

"I draw the line at going lingerie shopping with a woman who checks me out when she thinks I'm not looking." She gave the commander a scathing look when he snickered.

"I'm not touching that one."

They put on their mission faces as they stepped into the club. The lights were on full and the music was barely audible. He caught sight of half his squad sitting on their asses upon the dance floor, separated from a group of bruised and grumbling clubgoers who shot them angry looks. As they approached, a turian C-Sec lieutenant stepped up and held up a hand.

"This is a crime scene. I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Shepard bit back a sigh.

"I'm the captain of the rabble on the dance floor. What kind of trouble did they get themselves into this time?"

Before the lieutenant could answer, Jack chose to exercise her bountiful tact. "Hey! Shepard! Get us the fuck out of here! That turian has a stick so far up his ass I'm surprised he's not chewing on it!"

He could see Miranda drop her face into her palm beside him while Grunt and Zaeed broke into raucous laughter, drawing the ire of the lieutenant. "Be quiet, human, or I'll throw you into-"

Jack scoffed, folding her arms. "What? Solitary? Psh. I spent a year as a popsicle, asshole. Do your worst."

While the turian's mandibles quivered furiously, Shepard stared up at the ceiling and sighed. Only Jack could drag him away from a reunion with his mother and make everything even worse in the span of half an hour.

* * *

"What the hell was _that_ about?"

Joker nearly jumped out of his boots, whirling to see Ashley standing at his shoulder, dressed in a casual utility uniform and staring at the women on the bench. "Damn it, don't sneak up on people like that!"

"Nice to see you too, Joker." She smirked and folded her arms, inclining her head toward the bench. "You gonna answer my question? I'm guessing that's Tali, but who's the redhead? She looks familiar."

Attempting to slow his heart through force of will was getting him nowhere, so Joker gingerly bent to pick up the dropped bag of drinks, chuckling. "Tali just chewed out Shepard's mom. She's hardcore."

Ashley blinked and fixed him with an incredulous stare. "Shepard's_ mother? _Damn. Why? And when did Tali get so gutsy?"

"Because she called her son a jackass for not telling her he was alive for almost three weeks. As for her guts, I think that happened a few nights ago." She fixed Joker with a puzzled stare but he decided to keep his mouth shut and shook his head. "Nevermind, I don't want to die. What are you-"

"Ashley?"

Tali's surprised call drew their attention and they turned to see her wide silver eyes staring their way while Captain Shepard wiped her own dry. Grinning, Ashley gave Joker a pat and headed toward the bench, waving at Tali before snapping to attention. "Hello, ma'am. Lieutenant-"

"-Ashley Williams, formerly of the Normandy. We've met... briefly." Though Hannah's eyes were red again, Joker didn't miss the little spark of amusement in them and he grinned at the furrowing of Ash's brow and the twitch of her lips.

"You do look familiar, ma'am, but I can't recall when-"

"Where's Shepard?"

Ashley started at the sound of the urgency in the flanging voice but retained her bearing, while Joker and Tali turned to see Garrus jogging up with dark eyes and clenched fists. "He went to go get Jack and the others out of trouble," Tali answered dryly. "I told him not to let those three-"

"Damn," Garrus muttered, turning and beginning to pace. Hannah waved a hand and Ashley relaxed, turning and smirking at her turian friend.

"Nice to see you, too, Garrus."

"What? Oh. Yeah." Garrus nodded and turned back to Tali. "When will he be back?"

Hannah sighed. "I see what you mean about every day being exciting, Tali."

"You have no idea," Tali muttered. "We don't know, Garrus. I'll send him a message."

Garrus shook his head. "No, don't interrupt him. It's all right, I can take care of it myself."

"Take care of _what_?" Ashley asked in exasperation. "What the hell have you all been up to in the last few days? Tali's back with the crew and chewing out Shepard's mo... er, the captain.. for some reason, Garrus looks like he's about to explode, Shepard's off bailing out some more of the crew... I mean, seriously, what's going on?"

At that moment, the itch that had been building in Tali's nose turned into a sneeze and Joker broke into a fit of what he would later deny were giggles. A minute later he wiped his eyes and saw Tali and Ashley glaring at him, Hannah alternating her curious gaze between him and Tali, and Garrus still pacing. "What?" Joker asked defensively, setting the bag of drinks on the bench. "What are you looking at me like that for?"

Garrus preempted the females' replies, shaking his head. "Look, just tell Shepard one of my old C-Sec colleagues told me where to find Fade. He'll know what I'm talking about." He took a long step toward the Presidium Spire and its transit terminal, but Tali's irritated voice stopped him in his tracks.  
"Hold it, Vakarian! You're not going off to do something dangerous or stupid without backup. Get back here and tell us what's going on."

Garrus muttered a curse under his breath. Arguing with Tali when she had that particular tone of voice would probably get his visor and shield generator shorted out. Turning, he sighed and began explaining.

Ashley had felt the occasional pang of guilt about being in such infrequent contact with the others, but throwing herself into her duty had been her way of coping with losing what had been the best duty station and friends she'd ever had. Between OCS and ICT, she'd thought she had it rough, but hearing about Garrus' work on Omega and losing his entire squad hit home, bringing back unpleasant memories of Eden Prime and Virmire.

"There, you know what's going on. Like I said, tell Shepard where I've gone when he's through."

Garrus had always been uncomfortable around displays of sympathy, something she had in common with him, but he seemed unusually eager to be on his way. On impulse, Ashley grabbed the collar of his armor. "Hold it, Garrus. I'm coming with you." The surprised stare she received from dark green eyes almost made her laugh. "What? You don't think I'm going to let you walk into some criminal's den without backup, do you? Tali was right."

Mandibles twitched in irritation. "When did you and Tali become so damn bossy, anyways?"

A three-fingered hand grabbed the other side of his collar and he turned to see silver eyes behind a purple visor glaring at him, but Tali's voice was a fierce whisper. "Damn it, Garrus, you can't leave me here with Shepard's mother and Joker! That _bosh'tet_ doesn't have a filter between his brain and his mouth!"

Ashley was puzzled, but Garrus looked on the verge of being convinced. Good enough for her. "Three is better than two. Come on, I need to grab my gear."

Sighing, Garrus nodded and extricated their hands from their grip on his armor. "Fine."

As they walked away, Ashley heard Joker's awkward voice behind them. "Uh... so, Captain, do you want some juice?" She snickered.

"Poor Joker. Tali, why were you yelling at her, anyways?"

"Um... it's a long story."

* * *

One of the perks of being assigned to the staff of humanity's councilor was a Presidium apartment with a great view, but they were there only long enough for Ashley to change into her armor and grab her weapons and another painkiller. Tali eyed her from the passenger seat of the skycar while she was flexing her ankle.

"Are you okay? I heard that... thing on Horizon broke your leg."

"Yeah, I'll be fine. It's mostly better, just aches some." Ashley shuddered slightly. "God, that thing was creepier than Sovereign. It took possession of one of the Collectors like Sovereign did with Saren's body and it was ranting on about Shepard being the harbinger for humanity's destiny or something like that."

Garrus had been silent in the driver's seat until that moment. "What do you think they want with him? To make him into another Saren or something?"

It was Tali's turn to shiver at the thought and she seemed to shrink in the passenger seat. "I don't know. Maybe they think anyone who can beat their puppets would make an ever better one. Keelah, that scares me. The Collectors already hunted him down once and..."

Ashley reached up and squeezed her shoulder. "Hey, don't worry so much. The new Normandy's even better than the first one, right?"

"Yeah, and you should see her new guns." Garrus' low voice practically purred. "They nearly vaporized a geth dropship even inside atmosphere. And the armor we plan to install is tougher than Wrex."

Ashley laughed alongside Tali's weak chuckle. "Nothing's tougher than Wrex, Garrus. Well, except maybe Shepard." She squeezed Tali's shoulder lightly. Her quarian friend's feelings for the Spectre had been a poorly kept secret among the females of the SR-1.

"Damn right. The Collectors already killed him once; there's no way they'll stop him this time."

Ashley grinned when Tali let out an honest laugh but became concerned when she sneezed again. "Are you sick, Tali?" The silver-eyed glare shot Garrus' way before the turian could say anything was puzzling. The mysteries kept deepening.

"Approaching level 26. The warehouse isn't far." Garrus brought the skycar in for a landing while Ashley eyed him suspiciously. Was he covering for her?_ Hmm._

Three minutes later they were in a warehouse watching a volus waddle out from behind a stack of crates. _Really? This is Fade? 'Cue ball' or 'Rotundo' would fit better._ The two krogan that accompanied him with rifles kept her amusement at bay. Right. Of course it wasn't going to be that easy.

"Are you Fade?" Garrus asked, the edge back in his voice.

"Yes." The volus sucked in a breath. "So... which one of you wants to disappear?" Another breath. Ashley hated talking to volus. Quarians didn't suck air as if they breathed through a straw; why couldn't the volus study their suits?

"I'd rather see you make someone reappear," Garrus retorted.

"Ah... that's... not the service we provide." The volus sounded nervous, and the krogan's hands twitched on their weapons. _Crap._

When Garrus drew his pistol, Ashley yanked her rifle from her back and Tali pulled her shotgun. Shields were small comfort when two krogan had weapons aimed from only a few meters away, but they weren't exactly the first giant lizards to point guns at the trio. The krogan found that out the hard way when Fade ordered them to shoot. Two zaps from Garrus and Tali's omni-tools and a few shots later, and the volus' backup was on the ground groaning while their knees began the slow process of regenerating.

"Wait! Wait! I'm not Fade!"

Tali sighed and put away her shotgun. "I knew it. It's never that easy."

While Garrus knelt in front of the volus and interrogated him at gunpoint, Tali lost the battle to suppress a sneeze and muttered to herself while Ashley stretched out her aching foot. "Okay, I got stepped on by a reaper-possessed bug-man. What happened to you? Suit puncture?"

"No. Er, yes... well... no. It's..."

"A long story. Right." Ashley smirked and returned her attention to Garrus just in time to hear a familiar name. _Harkin is Fade?_ "Harkin? That pig? He's Fade? Oh, now I'm looking forward to this." Harkin, the disgrace of a human C-Sec officer, was one punch she regretted never throwing. Of course, Shepard had bounced the man's head off the table in Chora's Den after the crude remark about her figure, but still.

Garrus nodded his agreement and after a final threat to the volus, they departed the warehouse. Once outside, he strode purposefully toward their skycar but Tali jogged up and put a hand on his arm. "Wait, Garrus! Didn't you hear him? Harkin's in with the Blue Suns."

"Tali, we've killed a hundred of them. I'm not worried."

Ashley imagined silver eyes were rolling behind the visor. "You're not C-Sec anymore and in case you hadn't noticed, we don't have a Spectre with us who practically gives us legal immunity to firefights on the Citadel."

The darkness of Garrus' eyes resembled black holes when he glared at Tali, pulling his arm free of her hand. "We'll be ridding them of a nuisance. Bailey will probably thank us. And if that doesn't work, Shepard can do his thing." Turning away from them, he opened the skycar and slid inside while Tali and Ashley traded worried looks. "If you're not inside in ten seconds, I'll handle this myself."

Ashley sighed and slid into the back seat. "Hell with it. I haven't shot anything in a while."

Tali hesitated for a second before jogging around to the passenger side and getting in.

* * *

_Gods, no wonder Sparatus and I don't get along._ Shepard ground his teeth and exhaled a slow breath, fighting the urge to punch the turian lieutenant on the sensitive mandible. There was something about turian bureaucracy that seriously tried his patience, even when he was the picture of civility to Tevos and Valern. It had taken five long minutes to get the stubborn lieutenant – who apparently abhorred the fact that he reported to a human – to call Bailey and report. To his credit, the C-Sec captain put on a good acting job, pretending as if Shepard hadn't spoken to him before and putting on a show of being thoughtful regarding the justicar issue. Finally, the lieutenant was countermanded, five of his crew were free to go, and the problem was resolved.

And then his omni-tool beeped at him. Samara gave him a curious look when he uttered a quiet growl in his throat and opened the link. "Yes?"

_"Shepard, it's Tali."_ Right, he could have taken the time to check the caller before barking at his lover.

"Oh, hey, Tali. Is everything all right? Has my mother tried to pry stories out of you yet?"

_"Um, sort of. She's with Joker. Look, Garrus found Fade and we're... on our way to the factory district to, uh, interrogate him. I think."_

Sighing, he ran a hand back through his hair. One uninterrupted day of shore leave was, apparently, too much to ask. "What's going on? Garrus said he'd tell me if it was time sensitive."

_"I don't know. I'm worried about him. He's... well, do you remember when we found that krogan scientist on Virmire?"_

_Uh oh._ "Yes, I do," he replied cautiously.

_"Well, then you remember when Wrex threw down his weapon and charged him in the middle of the fight and-"_

"Got it." He glanced over at Samara and Thane, the very definition of calm, and then aside at Grunt, Jack, and Zaeed, who looked intrigued. "And he won't wait?"

_"No,"_ Tali replied sadly. _"What do you want us to do? Stick with him?"_

Shepard frowned. "Who's 'us'?"

_"Oh. We ran into Ashley and she's with us. Sorry, I muted myself so Garrus can't overhear."_

"Ashley, huh?" He rubbed the rough stubble on his jaw and stared up at Kithoi Ward for a moment before beckoning the squad and setting off toward a transit terminal. A determined Garrus, Tali, and Ashley was a team he'd put up against a squad of krogan."All right, look, it's your call. Try to stall him if you can. But if he won't listen and you think he's going to do something stupid and get you killed, and all else fails, knock him out or disable his weapons and shield generator. I'll handle the fallout."

* * *

The quiet in the skycar had been heavy, but the silence on the line after being told to attack Garrus if necessary was worse. Tali glanced aside at the turian, watching his dark eyes fixed intently on their destination, the tension in his jaw and hands. Still... "I don't think it'll go that far. He's just... single-minded, not crazy."

It was silent for another moment before he answered. _"Okay. Be careful. I'm on my way."_

The line clicked off and Tali sighed, trading a look with Ashley and shrugging helplessly. The sudden feeling of weightlessness in her stomach drew her attention and she turned to see the car descending to a landing spot in a loading bay... near a couple of figures in Blue Suns armor. She swore under her breath, not having expected to arrive so fast. Before she could unmute herself and reach out to stop Garrus, he was already springing out of the car and walking toward the troopers as a door opened. A balding man stepped out with a sneer on his lips, turning to one of the troopers and pointing a finger, but Garrus' approach drew his attention and his jaw fell open.

"...Garrus?"

When their friend reached for his rifle, Ashley and Tali both cursed and grabbed their weapons, diving behind cover while the Suns troopers opened fire. Garrus slid into cover just as his barriers shattered, yelling over the crate. "Run all you want, Harkin! I'll find you!" Tali usually liked the pleasant sound of his flanged voice, but at that moment it sounded chilling and menacing.

A second later, she and Ashley were firing around cover at the troopers too stupid to take cover while reloading, spraying the wall behind them with flecks of blood. Garrus vaulted his cover and stalked past the corpses to the door, keying it and leading them inside while Ash and Tali traded another concerned look. The warehouse was a gargantuan expanse of space and a virtual maze of crates with cranes rushing back and forth overhead. Hundreds of places for ambushers to hide, lots of time to set traps if Blue Suns troops delayed them, and judging by the sound of unfolding LOKI mechs, there was plenty of opposition.

"Never easy," Tali muttered while she followed Garrus into cover. Ashley poured fire into two mechs and blew a trooper off his feet with a concussive shot before tossing an incendiary grenade at a trio of barrels with warning logos prominently painted. The ensuing explosion sent a sparking mech flying over their heads and Tali found herself suddenly laughing. Garrus chuckled as well and Ashley gave them both an amused look while she took cover and reloaded.

"Wrex and Shepard have really rubbed off on you two, I see."

"Don't you remember that last geth base in the Armstrong cluster?" Tali asked as she hopped over her crate and looked around. "Remember when Shepard blasted a juggernaut with a carnage shot while Wrex hit it with a biotic throw and it went flying across the room and nearly crushed Kaidan?"

"Good times," Garrus admitted while Ashley snickered. "But yes, one of us really had an effect on her."

_Bosh'tet!_ Tali gave his back a withering glare but felt a smirk tugging at her lips. His sense of humor was still present; that was good news, even if she'd make him pay for it later. He led them into a dense field of crates stacked at differing heights and Tali shook her head at the inefficiency of it all. Why weren't the crates all packed into containers and sorted? True, the Migrant Fleet's ships had crates all over the place, but they were neatly stacked along walls and labeled, inventoried, and cataloged. "Why does it seem like crates are taking over the galaxy?" she wondered aloud. "Is there some hidden purpose behind it all?"

Ashley snickered quietly behind her while she made her way carefully around a stack. "I don't know, Tali. Do you think the crates have a god of their own? A chaotic, mischievous god that tells them to cause trouble and provide convenient cover everywhere?"

"Let's save this discussion for later," Garrus growled. "Unless you want to get shot in the b-"

A burst of movement to the side drew the attention of the dextros, where a Blue Suns trooper had leaped over cover behind Ashley to get the muzzle of his rifle inside her shield perimeter. As soon as his weapon was within a few inches of her back, however, she spun and slammed it aside with her own before smashing him in the visor with the butt of her rifle and kicking his legs out from under him. When he hit the ground she put her muzzle to his helmet and fired. Rejoining them a moment later, she glanced sidelong at an impressed Garrus. "What were you saying?"

"Keelah," Tali muttered. "They teach you a lot at ICT, don't they?"

"Nah, I learned that from an asari commando on a joint training exercise. Come on, let's go." Though Ashley put her 'game face', as Kaidan had called it, back on, Tali could swear there was a hint of a proud grin on the human woman's lips.

The rest of their journey through the small maze of crates was uneventful, but when they stepped out of cover the panels on two storage containers slid open to reveal a half dozen LOKI mechs unfolding and taking aim. "Shit!" Ashley swore, diving forward behind a flatbed truck while Garrus threw himself backward over their previous cover and Tali leaped to the side, rolling behind more crates. "What is it with these damn mechs all over the place?"

"We've asked ourselves that same question," Garrus replied dryly before popping out cover and blasting the left side trio of mechs with an overload pulse. Tali stepped out of cover and opened fire on them with Ashley, taking a half dozen hits to her shields. She heard Ashley shout a warning but an energy drain pulse of her own recharged her shields and stunned the right side mechs. A tech mine from Garrus and a grenade from Ashley finished them all off.

"Nice to know we still play well together," Ashley said with a playful grin while she reloaded and followed Garrus toward a narrow path along the side of a deep storage pit. Their amusement faded at the weak smattering of cover and disappeared entirely when an overhead crane dropped a bulk white package down at the end of their path, one that made the floor tremble under their feet.

"Damn it, I hate these things!" Tali swore when the YMIR mech unfolded and spooled up its gun, spraying down their cover with hypersonic rounds. "Where's Shepard when you need him?" She half expected her boyfriend to slide into cover beside her just in the nick of time, a witty remark on his lips, but when Garrus just grunted and leaned out to unleash an electrical overload, she sighed. And sneezed. "_Bosh'tet._"

"You've gotten spoiled," Garrus called while he expended the clip of his Vindicator on the mech's tough shields. Ashley's disruptor ammo mod was more effective, but their foe had energy to spare.

"What, does Shepard have a superweapon against these things?" Ashley inquired while she reloaded and Tali drained shield energy from the advancing mech. They all ducked behind cover when the YMIR's missile launcher charged up.

"He _is_ the superweapon against these things," Garrus chuckled darkly. "We'll tell you about it-"

The rest of his words were droned out by the explosion of the missile on their cover and the booming echo that bounced back and forth across the metal walls of the bay. Setting aside the banter, they leaned out and poured fire onto the mech until blue flashes were replaced with sparks flying from around the armored cranial unit. They ducked back to reload while the mech fired, Garrus and Ashley drawing their sniper rifles. They put two heavy rounds into the YMIR's optics when its firing ceased and five seconds later they were wincing while a heated blast of air swept overhead.

"Garrus, what is it with you and miniature nuclear explosions?"

Tali didn't get an answer, as Garrus was quick to vault their cover and keep moving. The explosion had left their path largely free of cover, crates and a pair of vehicles blasted over the edge of the walkway, leaving them vulnerable. Moving at a brisk jog Garrus and Ashley led the way, coming under fire when a pair of Blue Suns sergeants leaned out of cover. Using a reverse of her energy drain program, Tali fed them energy from her own shields from her safe position behind them while their accurate fire ripped through their enemies' barriers and shredded their armor and flesh. When they reached the end of the path Ashley shot a grin over her shoulder.

"Have I ever told you how awesome it is having you around?"

Tali felt her cheeks warming at the compliment and smiled. "You just did. Thanks."

Their path led them to a small control room that overlooked the last section of the factory, giving them a moment's respite from keeping an eye on dark corners and concealing crates. Ashley lowered the shield over a large window while Garrus pulled up data on a console, a growl quiet in his throat.

"That bastard has been using C-Sec funds and equipment to operate his dirty little business. He's going to pay for that."

Ashley shot him a worried look but Tali waved her off and laid a hand lightly on Garrus' arm. "Garrus, I've never seen you so angry. Even when you were hunting for information on Saren. What are you going to do when we catch up with Harkin?"

He fixed her with a cold stare from his dark green eyes. "Make him talk."

She didn't back down, staring right back at him. "And if he doesn't? What will you do to him?"

His expression softened a little. "He's a coward, Tali. He'll talk. Before I do any permanent damage, at least. Come on."

When he stepped past Ashley to the door, the two women just shared another helpless look and a sigh before following him out into a nightmare of a battlefield. Blue Suns troopers held good positions on raised cargo platforms, firing missiles and accurate rifle fire down into their cover. But Tali's pink combat drone silently crept its way up behind the rocket wielder and zapped her in the back with enough force to send her stumbling out of cover. Garrus' Mantis put an armor piercing round through her visor while Ashley kept the other pinned down long enough for the drone to leisurely float its way over. Unfortunately, it was riddled with bullets before it could fire, but Tali took the moment of distraction to sprint over to the platform while Garrus and Ashley kept the trooper behind cover. Twenty seconds and a trio of strong jumps later, Tali had scaled the supports of the platform and came up behind the Blue Sun just in time for him to turn and get a shotgun blast to the chest from point-blank range.

They repeated the tactic of distraction two more times until they reached the end of the multi-level maze below the main control room. Home free at last, Garrus led the way in long strides toward a final set of platforms. As he neared them, they suddenly moved and Harkin's voice came over the loudspeaker. "You should have stayed away, Garrus! Here, play with this!"

The two YMIRs that dropped from overhead were unfolded and firing while the three of them scrambled back up the platforms to throw themselves behind cover in a storm of orange streaks and flashing sparks.

* * *

He'd been in a hurry but not in a rush until EDI came on the line and told him that the bio readings from Tali and Garrus were indicative of combat. Thane, Grunt, and Zaeed were already well on their way back to the Normandy when they landed at the factory complex, spotting a pair of dead Blue Suns mercs on the ground. Swearing, Shepard led Samara, Miranda and Jack on a dash through the factory with nothing but a pistol in his hand and a lightweight jacket on his frame, but the trail of exploded mechs and dead mercs reassured him every step of the way. Until they reached the final bay and heard a storm of YMIR fire and exploding missiles while they jumped and dropped through platforms of varying elevations. When they leaped up onto one they found Garrus, Tali, and Ashley all huddled together for cover behind battered crates.

"Are you okay?" Shepard shouted from a crouch. Three pairs of eyes went wide and Tali suddenly burst from cover, tackling him and yelling at the others to drop.

"What the fuck are you-"

Jack was cut off by a blinding flash and a deafening roar that made them all curl up protectively and cover their ears while squeezing their eyes shut against the heat and light. Ten seconds later, when the platform stopped trembling violently, Shepard blinked his eyes open but saw nothing but darkness until he realized Tali's gloves were cupping his face protectively while she practically buried him with her body.

"You couldn't have been ten more seconds late?" Tali finally asked, rising off him and helping him to his feet while Samara did the same for Jack.

"You can add me to your 'rescued _bosh'tets_' list, I guess," he replied with a wry smile.

Ashley laughed, drawing their attention. "Good idea, Skipper. Nice job with the double hack, Tali. I've never seen two YMIRs trying to blow each other's heads off before."

Tali shrugged modestly but Shepard grinned. "Sounds like I missed all the fun."

"Not all of it. Harkin's up there, Shepard." Garrus' voice was cold but laced with anticipation. "Want to go say hello?"

"Harkin is 'Fade'?" He glanced at Ashley, who smirked and cracked her knuckles. "Yeah, let's go say hello."

Dismissing Miranda, Samara and Jack to go enjoy themselves non-violently, he followed Garrus and Ashley toward the final platforms, but Tali's hand on his arm gently slowed him and even through the visor he could see the apprehension in her eyes.

* * *

Though Harkin was scum and Ashley grinned wickedly when Garrus' armored knee caught the swine in the crotch, the sight of the man turning blue and gasping beneath a heavy boot was unnerving her. Not for Harkin's sake, but for the turian she'd come to call a friend. A hand on Garrus' shoulder only got irritably shoved aside, leaving her torn. She breathed a sigh of relief when Shepard and Tali came jogging in and the latter moved up to place a light hand on Garrus' shoulder.

"Come on, Garrus. He's not going anywhere."

Ashley's brows rose in surprise when the boot slipped off Harkin's neck and the man coughed for breath, skittering away to lean hard against the wall. Either Tali had the magic touch or it was a dextro thing. "Terminus really changed you, didn't it, Garrus?" Harkin croaked.

"No, but Sidonis... opened my eyes. Arrange a meeting."

They let the disgraced C-Sec officer find his own way to his feet and stumble to a terminal. The sight of Garrus pulling his pistol from his hip made Ashley want to sigh, but Shepard stepped in front of him and fixed him with a hard stare, freeing her up to keep an eye on Harkin. "Garrus, what's going on with you?"

"He's a criminal, Shepard. So was Doctor Saleon. Don't you remember?"

The mention of the psychotic salarian who had evaded Garrus in his C-Sec days put a frown on Shepard's face. He'd put a bullet in the fiend himself to spare Garrus the weight of the decision. "We found him on a ship in the middle of nowhere full of horrific experiments, he was armed, you made a positive ID, and we couldn't spare a room to lock him up in. C-Sec can be here for Harkin in minutes. Don't mistake a calculated judgment for thoughtless murder."

"Like that Cerberus scientist Toombs had at gunpoint?" Garrus retorted quietly. "You put a bullet in him, too. What was that, _thoughtful _murder?"

Tali gasped when Shepard's fist slammed into Garrus' jaw and sent the turian sprawling onto the floor.

* * *

**Author's note:**

_Thanks for all the positive reviews on the last chapter and others. Sorry for taking three weeks on this one. Too many projects but I don't have Mordin's ability to multitask. Disappointing._

_Pacing, as far as checking off missions on a list goes, has been slow for a while. That will change soon. Can't help from getting verbose when it comes to our core characters, though. (Hell, you should see the post-ME3 stuff I wrote last year that **might** be rewritten into a story here). Could be a flaw. Maybe. Not sure. Too many variables._

_Lots of character analysis to follow. If you'd like to discuss it, please send me a PM. Would love insight._

_Sometimes I wish I'd written an ME1 novelization first (well, I've started on one, but it's low priority). The end of this chapter is one of the reasons why. There's little back story into the reasons behind his decision-making for things like the Council and the killing of Drs. Wayne and Saleon without one._

_If I was to measure my Shepard on the Paragon / Renegade scale, he'd be ~2/3 Paragon and ~1/3 Renegade. Though he believes in cooperation with the alien races, for example, saving the Council was not simply an idealistic decision for him. While Sovereign was the larger threat and the most logical decision would be to hold back the Alliance fleet, he recognized the goodwill the Alliance would earn by saving the asari flagship and the Council. (Of course, Tali's input helped nudge him. I envision her as sort of the backup conscience of Shepard's, taking over Kaidan's role as they got to know each other in ME1. We'll see what happens to that when Legion comes onto the scene...)_

_He'll kill monsters like Saleon for practical reasons, but also to spare Garrus from having it on his conscience. And yes, though he doesn't suffer from debilitating nightmares over Akuze (don't think a military organization would let someone so psychologically messed up command a ship), it's a sore spot, as Garrus has discovered. There are feelings of hypocrisy, even if he can articulate reasons why Harkin should be spared but Saleon and Doctor Wayne should not have been. More on that in the next chapter._

_Tali taking Hannah's head off was fun to write, and I did so to display how strong her feelings and commitment run (and to show Hannah's fiery nature [especially after such an emotional day]... crazy redheads), but then I pondered it for a while. Though we don't see Tali losing her temper much in the games, other than choosing certain dialogue regarding Rannoch on the Alarei (am I missing others?), loyalty has always been one of her core traits and she's protective (as Mordin previously stated). Not quite sure if it fits, though. Analysis didn't lead to consensus. Input appreciated._

_A question: do you think this story belongs under T or M? My mind, in general, belongs under the M category, as I'm an adult with shockingly pragmatic views on almost everything, but it seems like detailed sexual descriptions are the primary reason to label something M on this site. Originally posted it as M just because I figured my writing style was best suited for that rating, but I thought I'd ask._

_Thanks for reading!_


	27. Lessons

**Author's note:**

_Remember that in turian society if someone not up to the job is promoted, the blame falls not on them but on the person who put them in that position._

_Sorry for the slow update. Sometimes it's hard to stay focused on writing if I keep things too serious. No doubt a flaw, but it's also becoming a learning experience._

_I've rewritten the first chapter and am working on the second, but I might add some more so neither have been posted yet. Perhaps on the next update._

* * *

Garrus' shock lasted only a split second, replaced by rage while he twisted into a crouch and hurled his pistol at the scowling human stalking toward him. Shepard slammed it aside with a backhand, cutting his knuckles, and hopped over the armored leg that tried to sweep him off his feet. Only a quiet grunt indicated he felt the heavy punch that Garrus landed on his ribs when he dropped to his knees, but it was the only hit the turian got in before his wrists were grabbed in biotically charged hands and pinned hard against blue chest armor. Shepard's voice was almost a growl while he shoved his friend onto his back on the metal deck and kept him pinned through futile attempts to struggle.

"Let's hear it, Garrus! Get it off your chest, or you can stay here on the Citadel and go begging on your knees to Pallin for your old job back!"

Neither noticed when Harkin took the opportunity to make a break for the exit only to be promptly laid out by a clothesline from Ashley. Cold azure eyes were locked on nearly black orbs while Garrus bared pointed teeth and his mandibles jerked in fury. Shepard had seen Garrus frustrated, despondent, and angry, but he had never seen the raw, almost primal rage his friend was displaying.

"It's so easy for you, isn't it, Shepard?" Garrus snarled. "You killed the batarians that murdered your family. You wiped out dozens of Cerberus scum that might have sent your men to their deaths. You put a bullet in Haliat's head, and suckered Saren into doing the job himself." Garrus' quivered and struggled with renewed anger, but Shepard scowled and slammed him back onto the deck, earning a furious hiss for his efforts. "You're a damn hypocrite. Who are you to tell me what I can't do when ten of my men are dead and unavenged?"

Garrus' words bit deep and heated his blood in a rush of fury, but he knew there was a grain of truth in them. He hadn't shot Doctor Wayne solely to spare Toombs the consequences of murder, even if he hadn't rejoiced about it afterward. The shifting of silver boots in his peripheral vision caught his attention and his anger subsided a touch to let worry find a place in his thoughts. But he shook it off and took a deep breath, setting his jaw to stare back down at his pinned friend. "When did I tell you what to do? What did I say? I told you I'd be right there with you if you were sure, like you were with Saleon. But you're not fooling me, Garrus." He released his friend and rose in a single motion, folding his arms and staring coldly at the glaring turian. "You're not sure. That was about justice. You were angry, but you were angry at the system. It wasn't personal."

"Well, this is," Garrus growled while he stood, fists clenched tightly at his sides. A drop of blue blood dripped from his jaw while he took a menacing step toward Shepard. "He killed ten of my men! He-"

"No, _you_ did that."

The room went silent and he could feel Tali and Ashley's incredulous stares directed at him, but he forced himself to stare down his shocked turian friend and to remain still when another flanging growl broke the quiet. "How dare you, you son of a-" Garrus swung his fist with surprising speed, but Shepard grabbed his wrist and collar, twisting and hurling him into a wall hard enough to jar his visor loose and make him grunt in pain from bent fringe. The human didn't advance, but refolded his arms and stared coldly at dark eyes.

"_You_ killed them. You picked Sidonis. You put him on your team. He was your responsibility. You made that bad choice, and you got ten good men killed!" Shepard shook his head grimly. "You called yourself a bad turian, but you were wrong. Being turian is about justice and responsibility, not rule books. You had that in spades. Until you tried to blame the wrong man." Garrus was quivering with fury, but after two steps forward he was rooted in place and his eyes lost their focus to stare blankly off into space. Shepard gave him a moment to let it sink in before continuing, his voice falling quiet. "You see it now, don't you? It's not personal because they were your men, your responsibility. It's because _Sidonis_ was your responsibility. And you think you failed. You blame yourself like a good turian is supposed to, even when you're at war in your own head over who really is at fault."

Dark eyes dropped to the floor when silence returned. Sighing, Shepard retrieved Garrus' pistol, holding it out for him. "I know who's at fault here, but I'm not a turian. I can't make you see that betrayal is only that if it's the breaking of a trust that was earned. I can't force you to accept that betrayal is _always_ out of the hands of the one betrayed." Meeting Garrus' eyes, he shrugged and released the pistol into his friend's grip. "Maybe I am a hypocrite. I might even be a murderer. But you're not. You're still about justice, not revenge. So if you can tell me you're doing it for the right reasons, if you tell me you're doing it because you're taking responsibility instead of feeling bloodthirsty, if you're sure you can live with the decision, then I'll watch you put a bullet in Sidonis' head and I'll tell C-Sec it was Spectre business if they figure it out."

Turning on his heel, he walked out of the room while three pairs of eyes followed him in silence.

* * *

Hannah Shepard hadn't bothered with the juice or looked twice at the pills she tapped out into her palm, simply tossing them into her mouth and dry swallowing as if she had a lifetime's worth of practice at it. She certainly looked as if she had, her eyes puffy and reddened, but there was a quiet sort of determination in her that told him in no uncertain terms that she was indeed a Shepard. Her back was still straight and her gaze was still piercing, even after the emotional turmoil of discovering her dead son alive and being torn into by a fiercely protective quarian. Those blue eyes were unnerving him at that moment, and Joker squirmed a little on his seat, adjusting his ball cap.

"So... um... sorry about Tali. I'm not going to ask what set her off, but she's just really protective of... well, all of us are, really." A hint of a smile curled Hannah's lips and Joker resisted the temptation to exhale a loud sigh of relief.

"My son wrote to me about all of you, and it was all rather flattering. His first description of Tali was that she reminded him of his sister, a real sweetheart if ever there was one." Her smile widened a touch, growing into something wistful for a moment before it vanished. Chuckling, Hannah shook her head. "I can see _that_ wasn't the entire truth."

"You have no idea," Joker muttered under his breath. Hannah's lips twitched into a grin.

"Well, we'll all have to have dinner tonight. I didn't really get a chance to meet any of you two years ago." Retrieving a bottle of fruit juice she opened it and wet her throat while Joker tried to suppress the sense of imminent doom. Apparently, he did a bad job at it. Hannah eyed him curiously. "Oh, come on, now. I'm not _that_ terrifying. And my son has said that you're the best pilot the Alliance ever turned out."

_Great. Now even his mother is singing my praises._ Joker sighed and hung his head, pulling his cap off to run his fingers awkwardly through his hair. "Look... there's something you should know about how Shepard died."

He didn't look up. At that moment, a firing squad would have been preferable, but he grit his teeth and started talking.

* * *

He recognized the booted steps that approached from behind while he leaned on the railing overlooking the factory and wasn't surprised when he turned his head to see Ashley adopting the same pose beside him. "Hey, Ash."

She gave him a small grin. "I didn't lose the coin toss, if that's what you were going to ask."

"It wasn't," he said, shrugging. He knew Tali wouldn't leave Garrus alone in his state of mind. "How's your leg?"

Ashley looked down, shaking her foot. "It works. I've gotta admit, watching you beat the shit out of that Reaper puppet was pretty satisfying. Can't say I was looking forward to watching you do the same to Garrus, though."

Whatever was going on behind those warm brown eyes of hers, it involved some concern and a measure of caution and it stoked the embers of his anger. "What, you thought I was going to beat him to death?" he snapped.

She shook her head quickly. "No! I know you better than that. I was just... worried for a second. I mean, between the whole resurrected by Cerberus thing and that biotic move you pulled off on Mr. Harbinger of Destiny... I don't know. It's all kind of crazy." She bit her lip, furrowing her brow but meeting his stern gaze.

"I think it's safe to say that Tali, Garrus, Joker and Chakwas aren't losing any sleep about me. You shouldn't, either."

Ashley's eyes did drop away from his then and she nodded slightly. "You're right. Sorry. I guess... I just figured you were in heaven, having a barbecue with my dad and yours. Never heard of anyone checking out before, you know? I don't know what to think about it all."

Her words cooled the anger stirring in his breast and he returned his gaze to the mess of crates and platforms with a resigned sigh. "That's a memory I wish I had. Instead, all I have are a few disturbing dreams that probably only started in the last week or so before I woke up." Feeling her eyes on him again, and deciding to go with deflection, he turned to shot her a weak grin. "Really scary stuff. In one of them, you wore a sun dress and Garrus was out of his armor."

"Oh God," she laughed, shaking her head. "That's at least better than a tinfoil miniskirt, but _please_ tell me Garrus was wearing clothes."

"If you say that I was wearing the miniskirt, I'm uncalibrating your new cannon," a quiet voice replied from behind them. They turned to see Garrus with a firm hand on Harkin's shoulder, the disgraced C-Sec officer glaring at the floor with hands tied behind his back and blood coagulating beneath his nostrils. Shepard arched a brow, but Ashley smirked.

"That was my doing. He ran into my forearm. Whoops."

"He got off easy." Shepard regarded Garrus thoughtfully, seeing something quiet and elusive in his eyes instead of the boiling anger they held ten minutes before. "Did you set up the meeting with Sidonis?"

"Yeah," Garrus replied quietly. "You had it right. It's his fault... but he's still my responsibility. I need to take it."

Tali stepped into view behind him and Shepard met her gaze. He could tell she didn't like the idea, and neither did he, but he looked back to Garrus and nodded. "All right, then. I'm with you."

"Me, too," Ashley said.

Tali hesitated, sighing quietly, but she spoke up as well. "Same here."

"Do I get a vote?" Harkin sneered.

"You get a cell. If you're lucky, it'll have a window." Garrus growled, his firm hand shoving their prisoner forward. "Let's go."

* * *

Sharing a car with a high-ranking Cerberus operative and a criminal dangerous enough to earn a stay in Purgatory was certainly a new experience, even to a justicar nine hundred years old. Miranda had made for the driver's position, but a discreetly murmured suggestion had left their fate in the hands of Jack. Though the two human women said nothing to each other during missions that wasn't relevant, there was an obvious tension between them when bullets were not flying. Although Samara had only been aboard a few days, she had heard enough to know the reasons behind the animosity. A former Cerberus experiment had little reason to feel anything but antipathy toward one of the organization's directors. Fortunately, Jack seemed to be content concentrating on the controls of the car instead of engaging in verbal combat with the Normandy's executive officer. Still, neither of them looked particularly at ease. It seemed as good a time as any to exercise her rusty interpersonal communications skills, so she twisted in the passenger's seat to gaze back at Miranda.

"I am curious about something, if you will indulge me."

Miranda nodded. "Of course. What is it?"

"During the incident on Daratar, the Commander utilized a biotic charge that I have seen only a few very powerful asari use. If I recall correctly, he was not a strong biotic two years ago. Or was my information incorrect?"

Samara did not fail to notice the sneer that curled Jack's lips or the snort she uttered, but Miranda only pursed her lips and nodded, ignoring the outburst. "Yes, that's true. It was a side effect of his rehabilitation and the new implant we installed."

Curious. She had heard one of the crew whispering about how Shepard had been dead and rebuilt, but outlandish rumors were common aboard ships. "Rehabilitation? Is there some truth to the rumors that he was dead, then?"

Jack was not content to simply scoff, instead preempting Miranda. "Oh, yeah. Cheerleader here's just another Cerberus scientist; of course she wouldn't be happy just bringing a man back from the dead. She had to play god and poke at his corpse like a lab rat, just like some of their other scientists did to me." She twisted and glared daggers back at Miranda, ignoring the oncoming traffic rushing by at four hundred kilometers per hour. "The fuck's wrong with you people? Do you get turned on doing that kind of shit?"

Really, she should have known better than to disturb the quiet status quo that had been present until she had opened her mouth. Samara resisted the urge to sigh, instead gesturing out the port window while Miranda just stared silently back at angry brown eyes. "We are drifting into oncoming traffic, Jack."

The bald human glared at a silent, icy Miranda for another few seconds before returning her attention to the controls. "Yeah, yeah, keep your suit on." Jack swerved them back into the proper traffic pattern through the sound of blaring alarms.

"Take your own advice, convict," Miranda muttered. Unfortunately for her, the warning noises ceased just as she began speaking and Jack quickly turned around again with a raised, glowing fist.

"Fuck you, bitch! I'll-"

"Enough!" Samara shouted, raising a barrier between the two women. Though their glare continued for a few moments, that strong, shimmering curtain seemed to cool Jack's temper and the azure glow Miranda had taken on slowly faded away.

"Fine. We'll talk about this later," Jack muttered, twisting forward again.

"Just keep it off the ship, unless you want Shepard to finish the job he started in the conference room before Illium," Miranda replied dismissively.

"Oh, no one will interrupt us, cheerleader. Count on it." Jack purred the words as if she was making a promise to a lover for a midnight rendezvous.

Samara let the barrier drop and caught Miranda's cold gaze. Though her pale blue eyes showed an outward confidence, there was a hint of fear behind them as well. Clearly, this was a disaster waiting to happen. Settling back into her seat, Samara allowed herself a small frown. It sounded as if Jack had come to blows with the Commander before... and lost? That was a curious mystery. It was worth investigating with the man himself... while she warned him about the storm brewing between the two women.

* * *

Tali and Ashley followed while Garrus led Shepard to a dark spot on the maintenance catwalks overlooking the street leading to the Orbital Lounge, the turian detailing his plan while they walked. A plan that very quickly made her nervous, a sentiment Ashley apparently shared if the frown on her face was any indication. Using Shepard as a lure to drag Sidonis into position for Garrus' shot was not an idea she relished.

"Hang on. Let me go talk to him. Shepard doesn't even have any armor on," Ashley proposed. Tali agreed wholeheartedly, but Garrus narrowed his eyes at her.

"Why would he need armor? This isn't a firefight."

"Be... because our plans always go to hell!" Tali blurted out, unable to help herself. It was true enough, but it sounded weak to her ears. She simply didn't want Shepard anywhere in Garrus' scope after what happened in the factory. What if he rushed his shot, or there were trigger happy guards, or-

Shepard reached over and patted their shoulders. "Not today. Besides, armor and guns will attract attention, and so would a quarian. Just keep a lookout for C-Sec and be ready to leave in a hurry."

Before they could object, he was springing over the railing to drop into the dark corner below them. Tali glared at Garrus, but he was already turning away and pulling his rifle. While he busied himself setting up and checking his scope calibration, Ashley leaned in close and murmured to her quarian friend.

"Okay, why am I suddenly so nervous about this?"

Tali's throat felt as if it was starting to close up to match her congested nose, and she could only shake her head helplessly.

* * *

Jacob had wisely restrained a chuckle when Kasumi's face twisted into a grimace at the first bite of her lunch, but judging by the thoughtful 'hmm' she uttered and the resumption of her chewing, perhaps the noodles were growing on her. She hadn't looked encouraged when she'd stopped to investigate the kiosk of Japanese cuisine, but her curiosity and growling stomach had gotten the better of her.

"So is it at least an acceptable substitute?" he asked before taking a bite of his tuna steak.

Dark eyes glittered beneath her hood while she shrugged and swallowed. "Welll... it's better than Rupert's attempt, at least."

"Hey!" the man in question protested, pointing his chopsticks threateningly at the thief. "I can cook asari, some turian and salarian, and a half dozen Earth cuisines. Don't get snippity at me for not getting too excited over noodles, missy."

Jacob watched the two exchange a long glare while he took in a forkful of steamed broccoli, grinning at the twitches of lips that betrayed their amusement. When Kasumi had first started dropping by the armory to chat, Garrus had warned her that the thief seemed to delight in harassing the more reserved members of the crew. But while she was a bit odd, she was a good source of levity, and his conversations with her took his mind off the Hugo Gernsback. The staring contest persisted until someone dropped into an empty seat at their table with a sigh and a rustling sound.

"Phew. I should have known the Citadel hasn't gotten any smaller since the last time I was here." Kelly pushed a couple of bags under the table and stretched out her back, grinning at Kasumi. "Ooh. Ramen?"

"That's the theory, at least," she replied with a wink before glancing under the table. "What'd you get?"

Jacob arched a brow when Kelly subtly nudged the bags farther away from the thief with her foot and shrugged nonchalantly. "Just some civilian clothes and some reading material. A couple more fish for the Commander. Oh, and I had a couple of mattresses sent to the Normandy, since almost everyone we pick up seems to prefer crashing out somewhere other than the crew quarters. Sure, we could rotate, but Shepard called hot-bunking a 'cruel thing to do to people out risking their asses hunting Reaper puppets'."

Kasumi grinned wide, earning her a smirk from Jacob. "How'd you manage to get the only other real bed on the ship other than Shepard's and Miranda's, anyways?"

She shrugged innocently. "You were too slow. You're supposed to abuse your power when you're third in command, aren't you?"

"If that's the case, Garrus should have taken it," Jacob answered dryly.

"He's just known him longer," Kelly replied kindly. "I imagine killing a Reaper tends to form strong bonds."

Swallowing a bite of food, Jacob waved a hand dismissively. It didn't bother him in the least. "No problems here. Actually, I think this might be the best mission I've ever been on. A great ship, great crew, and no red tape anywhere in sight." Grinning viciously, he leaned back in his chair and folded his arms. "Goal gets named, we get the money and gear to accomplish it, and Shepard says 'go kill it'. Dream job."

"Damn right," Rupert agreed.

"It's still weird for me," Kasumi said, shrugging. "I'm used to working alone or with... well, just one partner. And now I'm stuck on a ship with forty other people. I don't know how you all stay sane."

"Who says we are?" Rupert answered with a wink and a wide grin, drawing laughs from around the table.

"Too true," Jacob agreed. "Chasing after a dreadnought that blew up the first Normandy? We're definitely crazy."

Kelly tapped her chin with a fingertip thoughtfully. "I don't know about 'crazy', but you're all certainly fascinating." The skeptical looks she drew made her blink. "I mean, from a psychological standpoint. The mission is basically 'Hey, there's a race of galaxy-ending machines out there and the bogeymen work for them. Go kill them.' And most of the ground team just shrugged and said 'Okay'."

Rupert snorted congenially. "Aw, hell, that part's just good old-fashioned bravery."

"I'm not so sure," Kasumi replied. "I didn't know much except that we were investigating the colony disappearances. Now that I know what we're really chasing? Yeah. Crazy." Her grin was far from invisible even in the soft shadows cast by her hood, and Jacob chuckled. Crazy, brave... either worked.

* * *

_"Comm check."_

Tali and Ashley's anxiety was obvious. Whether they thought they were hiding it was a different matter altogether. If it had been any other situation, he would have been angry that they thought he would carelessly endanger Shepard's life, but at the moment he simply couldn't be bothered. Weeks of anger and guilt were about to be wiped away, to be replaced by the cold finality of justice. "I read you fine. I think I see him sitting on a bench at your one o'clock, but I don't have a good shot. Too much foot traffic. Bring him out into the middle."

_"Copy."_

"Here we go," Ashley breathed from her lookout's spot beside Garrus. Tali was fidgeting off to the side, but that was hardly an uncommon occurrence. To his relief, his own breathing was eerily regular and his hands as steady as they would be on a firing range. Shepard's earlier words had rattled him, and a part of him hated the man for voicing the truth he'd tried to keep buried, but there was no time for introspection. It was time to end this chapter and provide his men with the closure they deserved.

_"Sidonis?"_

_"Don't use that name!"_ the turian hissed, making Garrus bare his teeth in anger. Damned coward. _"Fade sent you?"_

"Come on, Shepard, get him in position," Garrus urged impatiently. But the Spectre wasn't listening.

_"Not quite. Remember Garrus?"_

His friend was going off script, but he couldn't help the sneering smile that twisted his mouth at the sudden terror that sprang to life on Sidonis' face. It was fitting that the traitor knew what was about to happen, and what anger he had still simmering over Shepard's earlier words and blows began fading away.

_"Oh, spirits,"_ Sidonis whispered breathlessly, his entire body suddenly tense and quivering. It was... delightful. The worm started to turn, to flee like the coward he was, and Garrus' finger found the trigger in an anticipatory caress, waiting for the shot, waiting for the perfect moment to take up the slack and dispense justice. But Shepard grabbed Sidonis' arm and yanked him back around to safety, covered by an unarmored human body.

"Damn it, Shepard! Let him go!" he protested. But his friend wasn't listening.

_"This is your only chance for confession. I can't promise it'll be your salvation, but you can either take responsibility like a turian, or run and be gunned down like a vorcha. You know how Garrus is with a rifle. There's no third option."_

His friend's baritone voice was steel but he released Sidonis' arm, and even with only half a turian head exposed Garrus could see Sidonis' face fall in shame. Only Shepard could get a coward to stand his ground, the bastard. He was barely aware of his finger leaving the trigger to turn up the volume on his earpiece.

_"I... what does it matter? They're all dead, and it's my fault."_

It was pathetic. Sidonis had once been a professional, filled with drive, eager to stand at his side while they dispensed justice on the murderous thugs of Omega's underbelly. But now he was just a broken shell, a worthless pile of self-loathing. Shaking his head, Garrus scowled and returned his focus to the scope and trigger.

_ "It matters because the truth should come out. Because this is your last chance to do right by the men you killed and take responsibility for leaving Garrus with ten bodies decomposing under blankets while he took everything Omega threw at him in __**their **__honor."_

'In their honor'. He'd thought the same words before, but suddenly they seemed wrong, somehow. Discordant notes of an instrument out of tune instead of a solemn, lingering harmony. His eyes unfocused for a moment only to sharpen through the scope when he heard Sidonis sigh and speak with a quiet, stronger tone, a hint of the turian he'd known revealed.

_ "You're r__ight. He deserves to know." _Sidonis lifted his head wearily and took a half step to the side, staring up into the darkness of the catwalks where a bullet awaited him, eyes hollow and dark. _"They captured me. Offered to pay me. I... I told them to go to hell. They threatened to find my brother... my niece. I still said no." _Sighing heavily, the turian turned and took a few steps to a railing, leaning heavily against it and staring blankly at the wall. It was a perfect shot, under the arm and through the heart and lungs, or through the cranium. Opting for the latter, Garrus tried to align the crosshairs on his temple but found them trembling.

_"They beat on me for a while, but when they took out a knife..."_ Sidonis' voice cracked, eyes shutting and shoulders slumping. _"I didn't give in to keep my family safe, but I did to save my own ass."_

Garrus listened intently, quivering with anger and disappointment, but for some reason his finger wouldn't curl and take up the last kilogram of pressure on the trigger. And while Shepard walked away, Sidonis just kept talking, spilling out every last detail of his cowardice, quivering with shame and misery while Garrus stared at him through the scope, caught up in a confusing tempest of emotions.

* * *

He wasn't surprised when the familiar footsteps approaching behind him fell as muted clunks instead of more metallic scrapes. Ashley could be quite graceful when she wanted or needed to be, but her typical approach more closely resembled that of Wrex: direct and lacking any desire for subtlety. At first he'd found that exciting and attractive, but Ashley was a bit too much like himself: bold, driven, questioning of the status quo. Liara had been an interesting contrast, and their brief melds had given him better insight into the intriguing asari maiden, but there had always been something lacking. For all the growing she'd done as a person during their mission, she was still a touch too aloof and naïve. Tali, though, was a different story. Despite her inexperience, she let nothing intimidate her and she absorbed every bit of info thrown her way faster than Wrex consumed his dinner, all the while keeping that kind heart of hers beating strongly. The thought of her brought a smile to his lips while he sipped his ale and Ashley slid to a seat across from him, ignoring the sideways gazes some of the bar patrons gave the armed and armored woman.

"Well, no gunshot or screaming civilians." Ashley leaned back in her chair and eyed him suspiciously. "How'd you know he wouldn't take the shot?"

Shepard shrugged and drained his glass. "It was just a feeling. But I led you sad bunch through some nasty crap. If I don't know my squad by now, then I'm a complete failure as a leader." Setting his glass down, he found himself staring at it in silence for a long moment while his mind returned to the jumbled thoughts he'd been having before Ashley's arrival. Their campaign against Saren had been remarkably straightforward: pursue Saren via any means possible. Aside from a few tough but relatively simple choices, it'd hadn't been all that complicated, really. No, the toughest parts about it had been trying to sort out his new and jumbled memories from the Prothean beacon while coping with the nightmares it caused, learning to be an effective captain while he was struggling to do the same with a team of aliens on the ground, and prioritizing the nearly endless list of missions Hackett and others sent his way while they were waiting for leads.

But he'd also found himself trying to be a leader, guide, teacher, and something of a father figure at times to a young crew and his little collection of dangerous aliens. He had taught Tali combat tactics and weaponry and general facts about the other races and the galaxy. Liara had received the same combat training and suggestions on how to operate with humans and other species. Wrex and Kaidan had needed only instruction in how to play drinking games, really. Ashley had received some guidance on the finer points of leadership and cooperation with the other races. But Garrus was something else entirely. His questions had been those of morality and boundaries more than anything else.

"Shepard?"

Ashley's concerned voice broke the silence and he looked up to see her gazing at him with concerned warmth in her brown eyes. He flashed her a small smile. "Sorry. I was just wondering if I screwed up with Garrus." Sighing, he leaned back in his chair and rubbed the back of his neck. "I wonder if too much of me or the Spectre mentality rubbed off on him. He used to be a lot like Liara and Tali in some ways: eager, optimistic, just."

"And now it takes practically a miracle to keep him from blowing an unarmed man's head off," Ashley finished, nodding somberly along with him. "Yeah, I think I understand." It was her turn to sigh while she slumped in her chair and folded her arms. "I'm sure you didn't know this, but I had a chance to waste Balak six months ago."

_Balak? That piece of shit!_ His ears twitched and his eyes flashed when he stared up at her. "A chance? Let me guess: he got away again?"

Ashley nodded. "Yeah. That squint fuck hit a cruise liner on its way to Eden Prime. He crippled it and left it on course to collide with a gas giant and we only had enough time to either chase him or help the passengers evacuate."

"And you chose the passengers," Shepard grumbled. It was the right call, but still...

"If it had been my call... maybe not." Ashley said, pursing her lips and staring down at the table. "I was pissed. I wanted to at least get close enough to shoot some Javelins at his ass, but the captain wouldn't hear of it. She almost confined me to quarters over it."

"She was probably right," he sighed, shaking his head. "Guess I screwed up with both of you."

A derisive snort was her answer, along with a smack of a boot to his calf under the table. "That wasn't my point, Shepard. The point is that sometimes both choices suck and you have to pick the lesser of two evils. Sometimes it's hard to tell which is which. And after a while it takes a toll. And Garrus has that whole turian mentality to deal with." When he looked up at her, she flashed him a wry grin. "You did good. You taught us that it's not usually black and white, that you can't just look at a handbook and a flowchart to make your decisions. Garrus and his team did good on Omega, and they could only operate in the grey. There wasn't any room for black and white there. Problem is, the fallout usually ends up in the grey, too. Grey is hard for turians to deal with." Putting a charming smile on her lips, she leaned back in her chair and laced her fingers behind her head. "Fortunately for the both of you, you had me to keep you in line and lead you out of the fog."

Shepard laughed, plucking a peanut from a bowl and flicking it at her head. Ashley dodged it with a smirk. "I forgot how... poetic... you are. And how much of a pain in the ass you are, too." He left the compliment about her newfound wisdom unspoken, though. No sense inflating her ego.

"You forgot charming and beautiful, skipper."

"I thought we were talking about you, not Tali or Liara." He smiled innocently while her mouth fell open in mock outrage.

"Why you... You know what, nevermind." She smiled serenely and shrugged, sighing theatrically. "You had your chance two years ago. You couldn't handle me now."

"Please," he scoffed, folding his arms. "I have a genetically perfect Cerberus femme fatale as my XO, a half-naked biotic powerhouse of a convict in my engineering subdeck, and a striking asari matriarch who's also a cold-blooded justicar. Oh, and I've kept a hamster and some fish alive for over a week now. If I can handle all that, some snotty lieutenant fresh out of ICT is child's play." He didn't shrivel under the glare he received, but he did arm himself with a handful of peanuts.

"You're forgetting Tali and that evil little drone of hers."

He resisted the urge to grin at the mention of his girlfriend and a threat she had made to have him zapped if he didn't release the covers he apparently hogged in his sleep. "Oh. Good point."

He had to dodge a peanut before Ashley laughed and shook her head. "What's up with her and Garrus, anyways?"

"Huh?"

She arched a dark brow. "I've been getting this vibe from her, and she keeps sticking with him while you walk off. And she's been sneezing. Have they...?"

He'd lifted his mug to take a sip, but the mouthful of ale became a cloud of droplets when he coughed after nearly choking on it. He heard her laughing and felt his cheeks heating up while he tried desperately to clear his windpipe.

* * *

"Is everything all right?" Chloe Michel asked while Karin Chakwas took a seat beside her at the asari cafe. She'd been recalled to the Normandy as a precaution while her stomach protested the deprivation of fresh fish and salad.

"Oh, yes. Apparently Garrus, Tali, and Ashley decided to go shoot up a gang of Blue Suns on Zakera Ward but no one was injured," Karin responded with a smirk and a hopeless shake of her head. "I really don't understand the fascination this crew has with wanton destruction."

Chloe's forehead wrinkled with concern but their lunch companion beat her to the punch. "Could be habit formed by three months of near-daily combat and associated adrenaline high. Could be boredom. Many factors." Karin almost grinned until she caught another glimpse of the bowl in front of their salarian companion. It looked like someone had collected interesting specimens from a swamp and it smelled little better. And there was something dark and crunchy lurking beneath the surface if Mordin's chewing was any indication. She tried not to think about it.

"I have a better theory," Chloe replied dryly. "Shepard. I swear, that man is a magnet for trouble. Every single time you docked on the Citadel you nearly cleaned me out of my supplies!" She sighed quietly. "I never thought he would abuse the discount I gave him. He nearly put me out of business!" She took a sad bite of her salad.

Karin grinned evilly, glancing sidelong at the redhead. "Actually, I was the one who abused it."

"What!?" Chloe glared at the older woman. "How could you? I thought we were friends!"

While Mordin chuckled under his breath and lifted another spoonful of swamp to his lips, Karin gave her sweetest smile. "You're right, I'm sorry. I'll tell you what: on the Normandy's next cruise, we'll trade places. You can treat an average of twenty contusions, ten lacerations, two fractures, and five bullet wounds a week, and I'll sit on my duff putting colorful bandages on the local children."

"Fine," Chloe retorted, shaking her fork at Karin. "It'll give me a chance to visit with Garrus and Tali and repair the hatchet job you did on the poor man's face."

"Hatchet job!?" Karin exclaimed, lifting her own fork threateningly while she regretted ever updating her friends' medical files with the latest entries. "I told him I could fix his scarring in a week or so, but he wouldn't hear of it."

"Some elements of turian mentality. Scars worn as proudly as medals. Likely even more important to Garrus as reminder of his squad," Mordin injected while he continued his multitasking of eating and working on his omni-tool.

"True," Chloe conceded, lowering her fork.

"You're just upset that his handsome visage has been marred," Karin muttered under her breath with a grin, receiving a kick under the table.

"Don't make me start on the mess you made of Shepard's face. At least those are mostly healed."

"That was Cerberus!" Karin protested. "They didn't even let me see him, the bastards."

"They probably didn't want him to come out looking like Garrus," Chloe muttered, drawing a snicker from Mordin and a glare from Karin.

"Possibly concerned about objections to tech, biotic amp upgrade, moral repercussions of bringing a man back from the dead. Not to mention Shepard's aversion to 'crappy bedside manner' as he put it."

"Thank you, Doctor Solus." Chloe smiled sweetly at a glowering Karin Chakwas.

"Call me Mordin. Fewer syllables. More efficient use of time when eating." The salarian didn't seem to fully grasp the concept of a social lunch, but food and research didn't stop him from remaining in tune with the conversation.

"Mordin, then." She took a bite of her salad before furrowing her brow and glancing between them. "What's Shepard's first name, anyways? I don't believe I've ever heard it. It's not even in his medical file!"

"Andrew," Karin responded, chuckling. "Though I'm not sure even his dog tags have his first name on them."

"Not Andrew," Mordin said casually, seemingly oblivious to their curious gazes while he tapped on his omni-tool.

"It's not?" Karin frowned. "That's what's in his Alliance file. I think you're mistaken, Mordin."

"Not mistaken," he replied. "Not his birth name. Took a new one when he enlisted."

"Oh." The women traded a curious glance. "What's his birth name, then?"

"Unknown. STG never found out. Mindoir records destroyed in attack, Alliance only has 'Andrew'. Possibly named after his father, Alastair, and changed name to avoid painful reminder. Supposition, though."

"Hmm," Karin mused thoughtfully. "Maybe we can ambush Shepard's mother and ask. Or perhaps Tali knows."

"Why would Tali know?" Chloe asked, confused.

Mordin and Karin traded a quick glance, then shrugged and went back to eating while green eyes regarded them both suspiciously.

* * *

"Oh, come on. Don't tell me you've never flipped through a copy," Ashley teased while he tried desperately to outpace her on the walk toward the inactive Conduit. Tali had commed and informed him that she was taking a rather quiet Garrus back to the ship before returning to the Presidium. Ashley, predictably, had disturbed the peaceful ride with her theories about the Normandy's two dextros. When she had snickered to herself and muttered something about knocking on a rocking clean room, he'd narrowly resisted the urge to pop the canopy and biotically toss her into the Presidium lake. Then she'd moved on to playfully accusing him of being grossed out by xenophilia, and then changing tacks and intimating he kept a subscription of Fornax under his bed. Really, this was becoming intolerable. It was time to put her in her place.

Stopping in his tracks, he whirled around and smirked mysteriously at her. "Why would I? A magazine is a poor substitute for the real thing. Trust me."

"What real thing?"

_Oh, hell._ Tali's voice was usually music to his ears, but not when its notes of curiosity sounded unexpectedly from off to the side on the heels of _that_ admission. He turned and swallowed, wondering just what the hell he was going to say, catching sight of not only Tali but his mother walking alongside her. Before he found words that would save him from certain doom, Ashley cheerfully chimed in with a reply.

"Oh, I just asked him if he'd ever kept a copy of Fornax under his bed." The grin on her face made him want to dump her body in the lake before sprinting for the Normandy. And the sudden twinkle in cobalt eyes and the evil curl of pink lips on his mother's face made him briefly contemplate dumping his own. Neither compared to the narrowing of silver eyes behind purple glass, however. He had a sudden glimpse of the future, and it contained a bed devoid of quarian company and a shower that squirted concentrated essence of poison ivy.

"Why are you asking him about _that?_" Tali's voice was quiet but he could have sworn there was something like a hiss in her intonation, a very dangerous sound, but she gave Ashley no time to answer, swiveling her sharp gaze over at him. "And what did you mean about it being a poor substitute?"

"I, uh..." He glanced at his mother who was hiding a grin behind her hand, silently willing her to remain silent about the time she had been on a call with him and two asari wandered into view behind him wrapped in towels, fresh from the shower. That medical leave was possibly quite memorable for that alone by most men's standards, but he barely remembered half of it in a fog of survivor's guilt and a foolish combination of alcohol and pain medication following the disaster at Akuze and his subsequent surgery.

"Well?" Tali demanded, oblivious to Ashley's confused gazes and his mother's suppressed snickering. Suddenly he wished he could close his eyes and find himself back in his cabin being glared at by Tali in the midst of Mordin's long discourse about interspecies sex. That had been far less dangerous.

_Shit. Now what? Oh! Yes, deflect blame. You had a sibling; you remember how to do that. _Sighing, he attempted to glare at Ashley. "Ask her. She kept rambling on about her theories that you and Garrus were an item before going on a tangent about my disgust or lack thereof regarding interspecies romances."

"_What!?_" Tali exclaimed while his mother's shoulders shook with muted laughter. "You thought Garrus and I... where did you come up with _that _idea? Have you been sniffing engine coolant?" While Ashley tried to stammer out a reply, he took the opportunity to slowly step toward the edge of Tali's peripheral vision to make his escape. It didn't work. Silver eyes snapped over at him and locked him in place with a dangerous squint. _Crap._

"Well, I... I mean, you had that vibe and the sneezing and were all worried about him..."

"'Vibe'? What 'vibe'? I wasn't vibrating. And what does my sneezing have to do with anything? And would you rather I left that confused _bosh'tet_ alone to do something stupid?" Turning, she glared at Shepard. "And what did you mean by a 'poor substitute'?"

"All right, enough of that!" Hannah finally took the opportunity to chime in, laughing and setting a hand lightly on Tali's shoulder. "Tali, you're scaring the poor lieutenant and you're sounding like a jealous lover in the process. Really, hasn't anyone taught you that you're supposed to make the _men_ jealous and not the other way around?" Blue eyes flashed with mirthful cunning. "Now, I know the mask doesn't help matters, but you have curves to set men's tongues wagging. Come on, let's take a walk and I'll give you a few pointers."

Hannah led Tali away while the poor quarian complied in a daze, staring at the older woman, wide-eyed and speechless. Ashley sidled over and snickered quietly before murmuring sidelong at him. "Your mom is awesome, Shepard. But now I'm _really_ confused."

He could only shake his head slowly, stunned as he watched the two women he loved walk away. "Please tell me that my mother isn't teaching my girlfriend how to make me jealous."

"Wait, what? Girlfriend?"

* * *

She should have felt bad, especially after Tali had so sadly recounted the details of the affair with Sidonis and the effect it had on her friend, but even a captain in the Systems Alliance wasn't above revenge. Even against someone half her age who she suspected was in love with her son. The chance to get a little payback for being yelled at earlier had been too good to pass up, and so when Tali had explained that her son was on his way with Ashley, she jumped at the opportunity to remark what a good soldier Williams was... and how beautiful. It had been hard to resist laughing at the sudden fit of squirming and sneezing that struck Tali, but thirty-two years of Alliance discipline had been up to the task. Barely.

While she blithely explained the finer points of putting a little extra sway into one's hips, she found she'd completely lost Tali's attention, so focused was the girl on gazing back over her shoulder at her son and Williams, who appeared to be quarreling rather intensely. _Interesting._ She remembered cutting into a dance between the two and the hostile gaze she'd received, and not only from the human. With a smirk on her lips she came to a stop and folded her arms, watching while both her son and Williams threw up their hands and stormed off in separate directions. She waited to speak until Tali took a step toward him, suppressing any hint of mirth in her voice.

"You know, Tali, we Shepards can smell fear. If you're going to sleep with my son you'd better learn to rein in your jealousy." The jolt that went through the quarian from head to toe didn't quite break her composure, but the sight of the violent twist of her masked head and the silver eyes that opened wide enough to resemble dinner plates forced a cruel smirk onto her lips.

"_What!?_ I... but..." Hannah was quite certain Tali gulped even if she couldn't hear it through the suit. "How... how did you know...?"

The apprehensive whisper of her voice was just too precious for words. Oh, the poor girl. It wasn't even a challenge. This time she allowed herself to grin, shrugging. "Because you just told me."

Tali groaned and hung her head, pressing a gloved hand to her purple visor. "Oh, keelah."

Whoever said revenge was a dish best served cold really needed more experience in the matter. Leaving Tali to stew in her awkward silence, she turned to smile brilliantly at her approaching son whose steps were slow and hesitant while he cautiously regarded his embarrassed lover. "You really need to give her some poker lessons."

Azure eyes flicked warily between the two women for a moment. "Why?"

She ignored the question, stepping up to his left side and running a fingertip along the fading white lines on his cheek while he eyed her suspiciously. "Tali, please tell me he doesn't have these patchwork scars all over the rest of him." The poor ex-Lieutenant Moreau had been greatly relieved when she'd eased his concerns that she'd attempt to strangle him for his part in her son's death, but absolution had come at the price of filling in some details Tali hadn't. It had been equally satisfying to make him nervous, though. Her son, however, was a different matter. The man could bluff the pants off of Admiral Hackett and charm an angry krogan if he wanted to (actually, she'd heard that he _had)_. And so in lieu of stiffening like Tali did, he simply narrowed those bright blue eyes and tilted his head as if puzzled.

"Why are you asking her? She's not the one who stitched me back together, you know."

"No, but she's seen you without a stitch of clothing," Hannah chirped, grinning when Tali buried her visor even deeper into her palm. Her son, to his credit, only rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Great, now dinner is going to be harassment and snooping instead of, you know, adult conversation. Not that you have any experience with that." He folded his arms and glared down at her, but imposing height and bulk and a reputation as the deadliest human in the galaxy weren't quite up to the task when one still remembered the three kilogram cooing bundle that clung to her shirt. She only smiled sweetly.

"Really, do you think so little of me?"

"You're an evil woman," Tali muttered from behind her hand. "She's definitely your mother, Shepard." _Shepard? Why doesn't she call him by his first name?_

"Hey, don't blame me for this," he grumbled. "I'm not the one who went into a fit because Ashley was being a pain in the ass."

"A _fit?_" Tali's hand dropped and her head shot up to glare silver daggers at him. "I'm not the one who was bragging about his... his..."

"Conquests?" Hannah provided helpfully, to the horror of her son. Oh, yes, revenge was an exquisite dish indeed, especially when you served two of them at once. Though getting her son and his lover into an argument was probably _not_ the best way to do things, now that she thought about it...

"Yes, _that!_ You... _bosh'tet!_" Stepping up to him, Tali poked him hard in the chest. "What were you bragging about? Quarian? Asari?" _Uh oh. Please don't say batarian..._ "No, wait, it was probably vorcha!" _Phew._

Grabbing her three-fingered hand despite her attempts to yank it away, her son cradled it between his, bravely weathering the glare she was giving him. "Damn it, Tali, I wasn't-"

"Wasn't talking about quarians, I'm sure." Her voice went from simmering to icy. _Not a good sign._

"You're right, I wasn't!" he exclaimed, finally reaching exasperation. That also was not a good sign. Once riled, he quickly progressed from exasperation to anger to fury. "I was-" She opened her mouth to intervene, but Tali beat him to the punch.

"Of course not, you-"

"I wasn't talking about quarians, plural, I was talking about _you!" _How he managed to get out a complete sentence without Tali interrupting was quite simply a miracle, to Hannah's thinking. But she saved her mental applause for his choice of words, as Tali went silent and ceased tugging fruitlessly at her trapped hand, choosing instead to stare up at him, blinking repeatedly. "And if you'll remember, I didn't go into details. You know me better than that." Well, it wasn't exactly a balcony scene with doublets and gowns, but it seemed he'd inherited his father's ability to charm even furious women, at least on a basic level. _Good enough. _

The silence got a bit awkward, though, while she watched them both just stare at their entwined hands at a loss for words. She decided to break the spell, but found herself struggling to come up with something until her mouth acted of its own accord. "Are there even any quarians in that magazine?" she mused quietly. "I mean, with the suits..."

"I'm not the Shepard that would know the answer to that," her son replied smoothly, lifting his gaze to Tali's silver eyes. "Go dig out your collection and let us know."

"And take your time about it," Tali muttered, adding a '_bosh'tet'_ under her breath. Hannah grinned, patting her son's shoulder.

"I like her."

Her son turned to glare at her, but there was a hint of a playful gleam in his azure eyes. "Oh, you're still here? You're like gum on the shoe. Or a bad penny."

"Or Conrad Verner," Tali added wryly, earning a laugh from her boyfriend while he drew her into an embrace.

"Worse, actually. He hasn't been annoying me for twenty-nine years."

"Thirty-one."

"Whatever you say, beautiful."

Hannah watched their interaction with fascination and a wide smile. She hadn't really understood two years ago why the young and inexperienced engineer was the most frequently mentioned name in her son's letters given his lack of interest in most things tech and the way biology and suits seemed an obstacle to romance, but things were becoming clearer. One moment a sweetheart and the next a spitfire, Tali would certainly keep things interesting for her son.

"So which one of you is going to tell me why my mother got chewed out by my girlfriend earlier?"

_Uh oh. _Tali turned toward her, tilting her head slowly. Hannah wondered if she had on a predatory smile behind that mask. _Probably._

"Oh, she called you a self-absorbed jackass for not ambushing her with the news that you were alive over the extranet." Turning back to her boyfriend, she blinked innocently. "Wait, didn't you tell me why you didn't do that? Something about not wanting to leave her with any doubts it was you, and being able to hug her?"

Hannah grimaced. _Okay. I deserved that._ She watched while her son nodded and slowly turned his gaze on her. "Oh, right. I remember that. As I recall, you were there for me while I was torn up about having to wait so long. I think part of it had to do with the fact that she's the captain of a dreadnought and couldn't just drop everything and go on shore leave and I had to work on some mission involving trying to save humanity from the Collectors. Not that that's important or anything."

"Fine, yes, I get it!" she snapped, rubbing her temples. "I got it hours ago when Tali shouted me down and made me cry. Again." _Damn them both, the lovable... bosh'tets? Is that the word?_

"You made her cry?" His voice was incredulous and she opened her eyes to see him beaming down at his quarian girlfriend. "Wow. The hell with _my_ reputation: you're the one that should be known throughout the galaxy."

Hannah's jaw dropped open. Poking fun at each other was one thing, but her own son was smiling about her pain? Of course, as quickly as his smile appeared, it vanished and she found herself enfolded in a tight hug, wrapped up in a comfort she'd missed desperately for two lonely years. She couldn't help the quiet sobs of joy and leftover grief that shook her slender frame, but this time she was smiling where her face was buried into her son's jacket. While two broad hands rubbed her back comfortingly, she felt a smaller one with three fingers give her shoulder a warm squeeze.

"Well," she heard her son murmur, "I guess it's not as hard as I remember." Hannah hiccuped a quiet and abrupt laugh, smiling wider at the touch of his lips on her hair. "And neither are you. You really need to work out more, mom. Tali puts you to shame."

Smirking, she rubbed her wet eyes on his jacket before lifting her head to see him grinning at her. "Well, I'm not a savior of the Citadel. Actually, I'm starting to think she's too good for you."

"Who trained you, anyways? A krogan?" He flashed her a wry grin. "Mothers are supposed to think no one's good enough for their children. I'm sure it's in a handbook somewhere."

"Never read one."

"Why am I not surprised?" Tali teased. Hannah turned her head to grin at the quarian, waving a finger at her.

"That kind of attitude makes for a good Shepard, but don't you start or I won't be buying your dinner."

Tali shuffled her feet a little but looked at her boyfriend and shrugged. "I'll just make him pay for it. He can afford it."

While her son sighed and shook his head, Hannah smiled and slipped from his embrace to drape an arm over Tali's shoulders. "She catches on quick." Leading her away, Hannah leaned in to murmur just loud enough for the younger Shepard to overhear. "Find us some place expensive."

"I was safer back on Elysium," she heard him mutter.

* * *

**Author's note:**

_In the games, Hannah's nothing more than a disembodied voice with a bland personality (not that she gets any time to even develop a personality). So you may consider her an OC if you'd like. You won't find many of them in my ME writing, given how many characters there are to keep track of already. Not sure if she stretches the bounds of believability for a fifty-four year old woman, but I figured my Shepard had to have had pretty tough and interesting role models to keep him going. Anderson is the calmer guide imparting wisdom and life lessons, while Hannah's the one that taught him not to give up and to find a reason to laugh (and is the source of his sense of humor and irreverent nature). The two of them collaborated to pull the younger Shepard up off the proverbial mat when Anderson sent him to the Citadel to meet his mother (the early chapter flashback where Anderson finds Shepard in the hangar). They'd probably make an interesting team. No, not that sort of team. The Collectors are horrifying enough without subjecting Shepard to worse terrors._

_Regarding Tali, to anyone who finds her a bit OOC, I can understand that. Before I sacked the original foreword to this story that served as Chapter 1, I mentioned that I'll write her a bit more assertive and aggressive than she's portrayed in the games. Now, I abhor when characters that are given a solid personality are written OOC, but I always felt like they didn't really show all of Tali's personality in the first place. You see Garrus, Liara, Ashley, etc covering the gamut of emotions but you almost never see Tali angry or aggressive outside of a couple of brief moments where she displays a temper, and she's proven to be as brave as the rest of them so she isn't plagued with self-doubt or lacking confidence. The fact that she pounces Shepard seconds after he takes her mask off proves she's not always quiet and relatively passive. So while you won't see her pulling a Grunt and charging the enemy, you will see her being more bold when it comes to her personal life in my writing. If you disagree with that, that's fine. I don't take it personally, but neither do I plan to change anything._


	28. Changing course

**Author's note:**

_Sorry for the long wait. Fortunately, I didn't occupy all my time off with thumb twiddling. The first two chapters have been rewritten and updated, and I plan to update one or two with each new chapter I post._

* * *

It was a pity Chora's Den had never reopened after the geth attack. That kind of soulless dive would have fit his mood perfectly. Instead Garrus found himself glancing with mild interest at a pair of shopping bags by Shepard's cabin door before he slammed a fist into the metal with a frustrated sigh. Locked, no doubt for Tali's benefit. If Shepard had been the one with the weak immune system he would have just overridden the lock, but Tali had never punched him and left his fringe aching. Fortunately, there was another source of dextro alcohol on board, even if it wasn't top shelf.

Two minutes later he entered the gun battery and locked the door behind him, dropping to a seat on a crate and taking a long pull of a spicy spirit while he stared off into a corner of the dim room. On impulse he pulled off his visor and gazed down at the ten names etched into its frame and the one that had been scratched out, sighing while he turned it over in his hands. He had lost count of how many times he'd asked himself whether he had done the right thing. They were unavenged, but was it more fitting to let a coward live with his crimes and his shame or to put the matter to rest permanently? He had no more of an answer at that moment than he had an hour prior when Sidonis' head was in his scope.

Had he spared him because of the remorse that had been displayed, or as a punishment, to let him live a miserable excuse for a life plagued with tortured dreams and the constant whispers of failure in his ears? Would it had been just to put him out of his misery?

After seeing the weight of the guilt on the man's shoulders, Garrus wasn't at all certain. He took another long sip and sighed, leaning his head against the weapons bench. There was one person on the crew he could ask about the nature of revenge versus justice, but he was the last person whose voice he wanted to hear at that moment.

His omni-tool beeped at him, and he glanced down to see an invitation from Grunt to spar down in the hangar. Garrus stared at it for a moment, then at his bottle, torn.

* * *

Tali wasn't sure what to make of Hannah Shepard. The woman had bounced from one mood to another, but of course she'd just been reunited with her dead son and had two years of grief to finish processing. Really, she should have been a little more understanding when Hannah's anger had surfaced, but something about being sick, even mildly, always left her a bit unsettled. Garrus' problem had added to the stress. Fortunately, Shepard had helped find a better solution to that problem, and he and his mother were in good spirits.

Hannah had been regaling her with a few childhood stories, to her delight, while the object of them pretended not to listen, following along behind them doing some paperwork on his omni-tool. That reminded her that she'd spent hardly any time in engineering since coming aboard, and the sudden wave of guilt made her bite her lip. Her father was no doubt disappointed that she hadn't taken the time to salvage more geth components from the destroyed drop ship over Haestrom. The fact that she simply notified the admirals that she was taking leave instead of requesting it wouldn't likely help. And if he knew what she'd been up to with her human boyfriend on his Cerberus ship... the thought was rather unsettling.

"Oh, you've _got_ to be kidding!"

Shepard's exasperated exclamation stopped Tali and Hannah in their tracks. Turning, they saw him glaring fiercely at his omni-tool. Whatever the problem was, it was certainly preferable to thinking about her father's certain disappointment.

"What?" Tali asked, head tilting curiously. "Don't tell me Conrad Verner just messaged you. Or did Grunt get arrested for eating a turian?"

Sighing, the commander shut down his omni-tool and looked up at his concerned girlfriend. "Worse." Turning his gaze to his mother, he smirked and folded his arms. "I'm being charged with tax evasion." _Tax evasion? The larger-than-life, returned from the dead Spectre... charged with tax evasion?_ Tali couldn't help but giggle... after muting her audio output.

"What?" Hannah asked, brow furrowing heavily. "How could you possibly have paid taxes when you were... well..."

"I should have expected this. Bailey even told me spending a year dead is a popular tax dodge." Sighing, he closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. "Idiot bureaucracy. I'm sure the right hand has no idea the left hand even exists. I wonder if they'll drop the charges and waive the penalties if I just pay what I would have if I was alive."

"Probably," Hannah said soothingly. "I'm sure Anderson can get it straightened out for you."

"How much do you owe?" Tali asked, a wry lilt in her voice. "Because if you tell me you can't afford dinner, I'll have to find another boyfriend. I mean, criminals are bad enough, but _poor_ criminals? I have standards, you know."

Hannah snickered behind a hand while her son's azure eyes opened to glare at his girlfriend, muttering something about digging gold. Tali was unfazed, folding her arms and tilting her head saucily. After a moment, he gave up and sighed. "One point three million with the penalties. Eight hundred thousand in straight taxes."

Hannah's eyes opened wide, her mirth dissipating. "What? How could you possibly owe that much in taxes?"

"Oh, he's rich," Tali said brightly, receiving another glare which she ignored. "He built a little empire out of all the scavenging he did while we were chasing Saren."

"It wasn't _that_ much after my last shopping spree before Ilos," he added wearily. "But two years of continued investments added up, apparently. Surprised the hell out of..." He stiffened and gazed back over his shoulder. "Wait a minute." The tension in his frame killed Tali's amusement.

"What?"

Shepard turned back to Tali, his face grim. "Barla Von set it all up for me."

She shrugged, not understanding. "And?"

A black eyebrow arched. "Barla Von, volus financial adviser, agent of the Shadow Broker?" Silver eyes opened wide in realization.

"The Shadow Broker?" Hannah said, surprised. "And you had him help you with your finances?"

"That was back when we were on the same side, when Saren crossed the Broker," Shepard replied, frowning. "Now he's doing things like trying to sell my body to the Collectors."

His mother paled. "He... he tried to..."

"He didn't count on an obsessed asari," Tali muttered. She'd tried hard to put Liara out of her mind for the time being, the situation too complicated to consider without stress.

Shepard winced but entwined his fingers with Tali's, squeezing lightly. "We really need to talk to Liara about that the next time we're on Illium." Tali hesitated before nodding fractionally. "Anyways," he said, turning back to his mother, "he failed, but I think he's still up to something. Which makes me wonder why the hell I even still have access to my accounts." Puzzled, he rubbed the stubble on his jawline. "I'm surprised the Broker didn't steal it or it wasn't transferred to you, Mom."

"Maybe Cerberus did something about it," Tali suggested. "I mean, it sounds like they have a lot of shady businesses in their pockets."

"That's possible," he conceded. "Let's head back to the ship. I want to get this straightened out while we're here, and Miranda can probably help." Giving the ladies a reassuring smile, he nodded toward the transit station and started walking.

"I don't trust that woman," Tali muttered, fingers tightening in Shepard's. "Her suit doesn't have any pockets."

Hannah smiled but said nothing.

* * *

Garrus and Thane watched from their spot by the shuttle while Samara dodged a biotically charged punch and kicked Jack's legs out from under her, spilling the human to the deck.

"Fuck!" Snarling, Jack twisted and sent a wave of dark energy at the asari matriarch, but Samara vanished in a streak of azure light, reappearing two meters to the right of her previous position. Jack's jaw dropped open, as did Garrus'. "God damn!" the younger biotic exclaimed. "How the hell did you do that?"

Samara stepped over to extend a hand to her opponent. "It is a highly advanced technique that took centuries to master."

Jack eyed the asari warily but took her hand, standing. "It looks like that charge Shepard uses."

"It is a similar technique. I was sufficiently surprised when I first saw him utilize it that I nearly took a rocket from one of the mechs."

Jack snorted. "Yeah, but he hasn't figured out warp or singularity, yet. It's like Cerberus gave a kid a loaded gun. Fuckers."

Garrus cleared his throat, drawing their attention. "So, Jack. Did you ever get the chance to get even with Cerberus for... whatever they did to you?"

"'Whatever they did to me'?" she echoed, her hands clenching into glowing fists. "They kept me locked up and experimented on me for _years_! I broke loose, yeah, and killed a couple of dozen guards and scientists, but I'm not even _close_ to being done." Her eyes narrowing to slits, she stared up at one of the cameras that surveyed the hangar. "By the time I'm finished, 'scorched earth' will take on a whole new meaning."

Garrus had ample time to watch the angry young human, at first sympathizing with her for being as mistreated by Cerberus as Admiral Kahoku and Corporal Toombs had been. But to his surprise, her answer to his question only left him uneasy.

"The Justicar Code prohibits the use of subterfuge when administering justice, but perhaps vocalizing your intentions while on the ship of your enemy is not the wisest course of action."

Jack turned to grin wickedly at Samara, shrugging carelessly. "Fuck it. I don't think Shepard will try to space me for talking." Grabbing her towel, she slung it over her shoulder and headed for the elevator. When she disappeared behind the shutting doors, Samara frowned subtly.

"She is a very angry young woman."

"Revenge occupies her thoughts," Thane added, inclining his head toward the space cleared for sparring. Samara nodded and accompanied him, both falling into combat stances. "It is... dangerous."

Garrus had been spellbound when he first saw the two agile biotics face off, suddenly wondering if the Normandy's commander or their old friend Wrex had finally found their matches in close combat. The Spectre was strong, fast, and brutally efficient. Wrex was slower but had the krogan's incredible resilience and immense strength. Samara had centuries of experience, agility, and powerful, tireless biotic ability that she combined with deadly effect. Thane was not as powerful as the others but possessed remarkable reflexes, speed, and agility, tending to use his biotics to augment the blows he waited with infinite patience to land. The thought of the four of them together left him wondering if they should set course for Tuchanka, and then dark space.

"What is your opinion, Garrus?"

Samara's voice interrupted his thoughts and he lifted his head to see the two warriors gazing expectantly at him, neither even breathing hard after a minute of furious attacks. "What?" he asked, clearing his throat.

"I asked if you believe Jack's desire for revenge will pose a threat to the mission or the crew," Thane said.

"Or perhaps one of the crew in particular," Samara added. "Jack and Miranda nearly came to blows earlier."

Garrus sighed quietly. Revenge seemed to be the day's theme. "I... don't know."

"Revenge can be blinding," Thane remarked quietly, the scrutiny of his dark eyes making Garrus shift uncomfortably. "And not always as satisfying as one would expect."

Did he know? Garrus snorted mentally. Of course he did. There were no secrets on such a small ship. The amused gossip about Tali and Shepard's attempts to keep their relationship quiet was evidence of that. With a sigh, he leaned heavily against the shuttle. "Yeah, I've... been wondering about that myself. It sounds like you have personal experience."

Thane's head lowered subtly, and he was quiet for a moment. "I... perhaps. I do not wish to speak of it. But I will say that the closure I sought came with a high price. Too high a price, in my case."

_What would have been the price?_ Despite his anger in the moment, he had later been quietly relieved that Shepard had taken the decision of what to do about Saleon out of his hands. While he often disagreed with his father, the thought of being considered a murderer by a just man had been chilling when he was reflecting on the matter beneath the Mako.

"I... no. No, you're probably right." Garrus admitted, feeling a weight lifted from his shoulders. Sparing Sidonis had not been satisfying, but a life like Jack's was not one he envied. "As for Jack... heh. Just sic Shepard on her. He'll figure it out." Rubbing his sore mandible, he grinned wickedly at the thought. Perhaps a _little_ revenge between friends was not such a bad thing.

* * *

Miranda shut off the feed from the hangar with a sigh. Things kept getting worse. After Horizon, she had been optimistic and impressed by their progress. She had been worried at the appearance of Ashley Williams, correctly anticipating Shepard's extended invitation for her to join them. Having an Alliance soldier aboard would not have made the Illusive Man happy, but fortunately that alarming situation had not developed. While his old crew boosted Shepard's morale, they were also obviously a weakness. And possibly a threat.

While diverting for Haestrom before Illium had ended up being optimal – by lucky happenstance – Tali's infection had endangered the mission on Illium, and they now had two aliens deep in Shepard's confidence that disliked Cerberus. And Shepard's deal with Jack had only further angered the hostile biotic, who now hated her with a passion for her role in redacting the Cerberus files that concerned the psychopath. To make matters worse, there was little for them to do other than to put the matter concerning Jacob's father to rest and to find a port to have the Silaris armor installed. When it came to their primary mission regarding the Collectors, there was nothing. At that point, any news would be good news.

When her console trilled at her, she blinked in surprise to see a message from one of her personal contacts, a sinking feeling suddenly leaving her with doubts regarding the validity of that particular expression.

Hannah gaped when they exited the elevator to the docking bay. She had seen the SR-1 when her son had given her a tour after the Battle of the Citadel and had been left impressed and envious. The new ship was an even more beautiful sight. The original Normandy, while quick and quiet, had been relatively fragile and lightly armed. Her successor looked every bit as fast, but the Javelin torpedo launchers and the large bay doors for the main guns spoke of some very nasty teeth.

"My jaw dropped when I first saw her, too," Tali said brightly. "She's amazing."

"The three finest ladies in the galaxy are all right here in this docking bay," Shepard added. "Worth spending two years as a science project, I think."

Hannah rolled her eyes and opened her mouth to retort before movement at the docking tube drew her attention. She couldn't help the brow that arched when she saw the raven-haired woman that emerged, clad in a skintight white jumpsuit. There was something rather severe about her, she could tell, but creases at the corners of her eyes and subtle wrinkles on her forehead spoke of some distress. "Who's that?" she murmured sidelong to her son.

"Miranda, my Cerberus XO," he replied while the woman in question approached, some hesitation in her steps. "She and Tali are the best of friends."

"_Bosh'tet,_" his girlfriend muttered.

"Shepard," Miranda said in greeting, her pale blue eyes flicking to the redhead with evident curiosity.

"Miranda, meet Captain Hannah Shepard of the Orizaba." His lips twisted into a wry smile. "She's here for the tour."

The brunette's eyes widened fractionally. Clearly the idea of an Alliance captain poking her nose around the Normandy alarmed her. Hannah suppressed a grin and decided to be diplomatic. In her own way.

"Oh, be nice," she chided. "Something's obviously on the poor girl's mind." Black brows rose sharply at being referred to as a 'girl'. "Come on, Tali, let's give them a minute."

When Tali and his mother were twenty meters away, the former animatedly explaining some feature or another, Shepard leaned against a railing and folded his arms. "What's going on? Did we get a lead?"

"I... no." Miranda shook her head, the fingers of one hand lightly rubbing below her throat in what was a surprisingly obvious nervous habit. "Shepard, I need... a favor. I find myself in the unfortunate position of asking for your help."

Personal business from Miranda was certainly a surprise. "I don't bite, you know," he reassured her. "Kasumi's detour to Bekenstein is evidence enough of that."

"Yes, but that was part of her arrangement with Cerberus," Miranda corrected. Her mask of professionalism fell into place but faded just as quickly. "This is personal, and... well, inconvenient."

Shepard eyed her more carefully. At first, he'd assumed she was just hesitant and perhaps nervous. But the more she spoke, the more obvious it was that she was truly worried. "A lot of things are. What's going on?"

* * *

"You're _leaving_?" his mother asked incredulously. "You just got here this morning!"

Hannah Shepard was a fearsome sight when angry, but a heartbreaking one sad and disappointed. Sighing, he ran a hand back through his hair. "It's time-sensitive, and it's on Illium. I can't just hop in a cab and be back in a couple of hours."

"What's so important that we have to cut shore leave short for Miranda?" Tali asked, clearly displeased at the notion of helping the Cerberus cell leader.

He grimaced. Though neither Jacob nor Miranda had asked him to keep their problems confidential, both were private people. But his mother, he knew, would understand. "Miranda has a sister, and she's in trouble." Hannah's face immediately softened, as expected. Tali was unreadable. Turning his attention to her, he continued. "I can't very well have my XO fraying at the seams when we're trying to fight Collectors. I'm sure Garrus would remind you of the consequences of that."

Silver eyes widened behind purple glass. "You're right. I don't think a distracted Miranda could leave behind a trail of massacred geth like you did."

The puzzlement on his mother's eyes made him chuckle quietly. "Another time, Mom. Look, knowing you, I bet you're maxed out on leave time. If you can get some, let me know. We need to put into port for a week or so for some upgrades; I'm sure we could make it work."

After a moment's frowning, his mother managed a faint smile and nodded. "Okay. Just make it soon."

"Count on it," he assured her, enfolding her in a hug.

* * *

"I thought you hated the media," Tali said while she helped him fasten the last strap on his armor in his cabin. Their transit time to Illium had been impressive, and Joker had proudly announced his besting of his previous record.

"I do," he confirmed, glancing over his shoulder at her. "Why?"

"Don't you know how recognizable you are walking around on an expensive asari world dressed in grey N7 armor?" she asked, amusement in her voice. "If you keep it up, those two reporters will track you down. Maybe even Conrad Verner," she added after a moment's pause.

"Keelah," he muttered. "Don't jinx me." Flashing her a smile, he pressed a kiss to her hood and hit the comm panel. "Miranda, you ready?"

_"I'm already at the airlock. We're running behind. Lanteia's waiting."_

Behind by two minutes. They'd docked five minutes ago. No doubt half the crew was already chomping at the bit to resume their abbreviated shore leave. "What's the hurry? You said your contact doesn't even know when they'll be arriving."

_"Wouldn't you be in a hurry if it was your sister?" _she replied tersely, making him grimace. "_I'm sorry,"_ she said after a moment of silence.

"It's fine. Be down in a minute. Shepard out."

"She's so tactful," Tali said drolly as they headed for the exit and the elevator. "Do you think Illium has a shop where you can buy someone a sense of humor?"

"Hopefully she'll grow one." Glancing aside at her, he grinned. "Why don't you ask Kelly? She seems to know where to shop."

"Keelah," Tali muttered, no doubt blushing at the reminder of what she'd discovered in one of the bags the yeoman had left outside the cabin door.

* * *

Lanteia, Miranda's asari contact, didn't have the best of news. Oriana and her family wasn't scheduled to arrive on Illium until the next day. Shepard had scowled, displeased by the twenty-four hours lost that he could have spent with his mother, but had been quick to shrug it off and recommend another sparring tournament in the hangar. Miranda was eager for the distraction, returning to the ship to organize it, leaving Tali and Shepard alone to wander Nos Astra's trading floor, both glancing up at a familiar window.

"Do we have to?" Tali asked, trying to ignore the butterflies in her stomach.

"You don't. I do." Sighing, Shepard paused by the stairs leading up to the office. "Look, I'm concerned about her, too. And about what she did. But she's one of us, and I doubt it was any easier on her than it was on the rest of you. You still had family, and so did Garrus and Ashley, but she was suddenly alone again. No mother, no sister, no... second mother." He shrugged and leaned against the wall. "Maybe she held on too tight, I don't know. But I do know that if she hadn't turned me over to Miranda you, Garrus, and maybe Ashley would all be dead by now."

Tali's head dipped at that reminder and after a long moment's pause she sighed quietly. "I know. It just... bothers me." Her fingers squirmed at her waist. "I don't know if it's because of how she feels about you, or..."

"Or?"

She raised her gaze to him, shrugging weakly. "Or... because she thought of it when I didn't. It never occurred to me to go down to the planet to look for your... for you. But she thought of it. She never gave up on you."

Shepard nodded slowly, sighing with guilt. He had hardly been kind or diplomatic to the woman who hadn't left him to rot as a specimen for the Collectors, storming out of Liara's office the way he did. They all seemed to carry scars, but Liara seemed to have been the most isolated of them all. Though she was over three times as old as him, there had been times where she reminded him of a girl barely out of her teens, wide-eyed and impressionable. He had that same impression when he had first met Tali, but it had quickly been dispelled when they had more than a few brief conversations about how awed she was by the Normandy. And while Liara had been forced by combat and the death of her mother to mature, it had felt like she was struggling to find a place, relying more heavily on him for guidance and support than the others.

"I don't know what's going on with her, but I think we'll probably need a few hours to sort it all out." He gave her a wry smile. "Good thing deck one is well stocked with alcohol. We might need it. Come on." He led Tali up the stairs, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze.

* * *

Despite her anxiety, Liara couldn't help but stop to stare through the windows at the Normandy's gleaming silver and black lines, a wistful smile upon her lips. Her last decade spent with her mother had been spent in a house that no longer felt like home, not with their constant disagreements on nearly every topic that was broached. She laughed softly, remembering when her mother had recommended in frustration she go dancing instead of spending yet another night curled up with her studies, in opposition to most other mothers of young maidens. It had taken her over fifty years, but she had finally taken that advice not long after the destruction of Sovereign. The Normandy had begun to feel like home, something she had been missing for decades. And then she had just as quickly lost it.

Liara exhaled a soft sigh, leaning her forehead against the cool glass. After two years of near-exile, she barely understood herself, so focused she had become on her objectives. But one of her goals had been accomplished: Shepard was alive. One more remained. She had tried to object to leaving her office when Shepard had forced a smile and asked her to join them on the Normandy, though she secretly craved the contact and the thought of setting foot on what might remind her of home. In the end, she'd hesitantly accepted, pretending to be lured by the promise of wine.

Lifting her head from the glass, she took a deep breath and forced a smile, remembering when they had been trapped underground working frantically to disarm a nuclear bomb. When Shepard had uttered a quiet laugh, she'd asked him in frenzied puzzlement what he found so amusing about being buried alive with a nuke. _"Just look on the bright side: it can't get any worse. And once I put my boot up Haliat's ass, it'll end up being a good day."_

True enough. It couldn't get any worse. Walking to the airlock, she keyed the panel.

_"Look, I already told you! We don't want to donate to the krogan orphans' fund!"_

Liara couldn't help but laugh at the sound of Joker's voice, remembering the warmth of dozens of jokes running the gamut from hilarious to puzzling. "I quit that job," she replied, smiling. "I'm... um... selling cookies."

_"Cookies? Well, why didn't you just say so?"_

The hatch hissed open and Liara's smile widened when the inner airlock door opened to reveal a frowning Joker leaning against the bulkhead. "I don't see any cookies."

"I said I was selling them. I didn't say I had them on me."

"Oh." Joker's green eyes looked her up and down before he grinned. "Well, you look sweet enough. I guess you'll do for now."

Liara blushed, stepping forward to lightly swat him on the arm. "I see you haven't changed."

Joker rubbed his tricep, shrugging. "Why mess with perfection?"

"Yes, I thought the same thing when I was debating whether to get facial markings."

Chuckling, the bearded pilot led the way toward the CIC with his customary limp. "Wow, when did you get a sense of humor? Wait, did Shepard's rub off on you when you were doing that freaky black eternity thing with your eyes?"

Liara winced at the reminder of her conversation with Tali but forced down the anxiety to shrug nonchalantly. "Yes. I also learned how to kill you twenty different ways with my bare hands." Her eyes roamed the CIC, marveling at the similarities to the original Normandy. The brighter light and polished bulkheads made it feel almost sterile, however. It was lacking the more familiar atmosphere of the SR-1, especially with all the Cerberus logos... and the crew members that regarded her with curiosity.

"Only twenty?" Joker asked as they approached the elevator, grinning. "I thought Shepard would know at least fifty."

Glancing sidelong at him, she smiled. "Sixty-five. The last forty-five are just overkill on someone with brittle bones."

"Great," he muttered, stepping into the elevator. "Shepard threatens to beat me up, Tali threatens me with her shotgun, Chakwas threatens me with big needles, and now you're joining in on the fun."

"Well, we have to keep ourselves entertained somehow."

When the door to Shepard's cabin opened, Liara's eyes widened. Where Shepard's quarters on the SR-1 had been spartan relative to their size, Cerberus workers seemed to have shrugged and asked themselves just what else they could throw into the loft. The glass display case half-filled with ships was impressive, if pointless, and the skylight was an indulgence, but it was the fish tank that sent her jaw dropping. She had an even larger one in her apartment, but still.

"A... fish tank? On a warship?"

"I don't get it either," Tali spoke up, her hands clasped nervously at her waist as she stood from the couch where she'd been hidden below the display case. "The hamster worries me, though. It keeps staring at me."

Liara's mouth had snapped shut at the sound of her friend's voice. Threatening clients who refused to pay came as child's play to a woman who had faced down hundreds of geth, krogan and mercs, but one slender quarian suddenly left her tongue dead weight inside her mouth.

"Yeah, they have teeth," Joker said. "And they're mean. He should have bought a guinea pig. Or a snake."

Liara and Tali were still awkwardly avoiding each other's eyes while they stepped over to examine the furry little creature that was gazing warily at them all with beady eyes. Neither noticed Karin Chakwas rolling her eyes and chuckling to herself.

* * *

Shepard looked into the flooded women's washroom, frowning. "Six hours? To repair a busted pipe?"

"Aye, but it's more than that," Kenneth Donnelly replied glumly in his Scottish brogue. "It looks like they didn't properly insulate the water lines in the yard, so we'll have to snake a fiber optic camera through the spaces to check for corrosion, electrical hazards, and the like. Then we'll have to-"

"Bottom line, six hours," he interrupted. Turning to Kenneth's partner in crime, he smirked. "If he starts making cracks about the women using the men's room, let me know and I'll restrict him to Irish whiskey on shore leave."

Gabby laughed, ignoring her colleague's look of abject horror. "Will do, Commander. But we're going to have to tear up the men's room soon before _those_ pipes go bad."

"What's this 'we' crap? Donnelly and Rupert will handle that while you're sipping martinis in a bar somewhere."

The two men opened their mouths to object but Shepard was already walking off, a grin on his face. A little subtle punishment was in order for the crack they'd made about their commander's showers lengthening since Haestrom, spoken as he'd walked up behind them.

"Commander, do you have a moment?"

Samara's smooth, elegant voice stopped him and he turned to see the justicar standing in the doorway to the starboard observation lounge, as calm and collected as ever. As EDI had not warned him that Liara and Tali were attempting to kill each other, he nodded and followed her into the lounge. "What's on your mind?"

Samara sat and folded her legs while he took one of the couches. "I am concerned about Jack. She nearly came to blows with Miranda when we were returning to the Normandy earlier. I fear her anger may boil over soon."

"Great." He sighed and ran a hand back through his short black hair. He'd almost allowed himself to forget that he had a ticking time bomb in his engineering subdeck, one he'd barely spent any time getting to know. He'd spent little time with Samara or Thane, either, but they were professionals. Jack was... he really didn't know, and that troubled him. He usually had little trouble identifying with those on his crew, one way or another. Perhaps that was the problem; he could identify with being a walking pit of anger, and she wasn't a pleasant reminder of that. A part of him didn't _want _to know her. And another wanted to help her but had no idea how. "Do you have any suggestions?" he asked the centuries-old asari.

She shrugged her shoulders fractionally. "Perhaps. I had given thought to working with her on her biotics. While she has power, she lacks patience and discipline. That kind of education may prove not just beneficial but also calming."

"Now you make her sound like me," he observed dryly. He still had no idea how he managed to get a handle on the biotic charge so quickly while more simple techniques eluded him. Where Liara and Kaidan had reminded him of artists, he felt more like a blunt object.

"Then you should join us," she suggested, the hint of a smile on her lips. "After all, I do not look forward to seeing the kind of damage the two of you could do inside a ship if you came to blows."

"We already did," he said darkly. "I can't say I'd like to-"

_"Commander, I have an incoming call for you from the Illusive Man. It's urgent."_

The subtle tension in Kelly's voice even over the intercom troubled him. The Illusive Man had taken to contacting them very infrequently after the first couple of weeks. Whether it was because he was focusing his attention on tracking the Collectors or because he no longer felt the need to check in on the investment that hated his organization, Shepard wasn't sure. Either way, if he had something urgent to discuss...

"We'll talk about this later," he promised, standing quickly. "Kelly, patch him through to the briefing room. I'll be there in a moment."

* * *

When the holographic grid shimmered into the lightly distorted view of that color-changing star and Cerberus' leader standing before it, he once more restrained a sneer. Turning, the Illusive Man's gazed on him calmly with those glowing cybernetic blue eyes of his and exhaled a plume of smoke.

"Shepard, we caught a break. I intercepted a distress call from a turian patrol. They stumbled upon a Collector ship beyond the Korlus system. The turians were wiped out, but not before they crippled the Collector vessel."

While the Illusive Man continued, speaking of the need to gather data, Shepard was listening carefully to the alarm bells that had started going off in his head. The Collectors had set a trap for him on Horizon, using Ashley as bait. They had possibly even engineered the ship disappearances in the Omega Nebula that had resulted in him asphyxiating over Alchera. Something didn't feel right.

"You're telling me a few turian frigates left a dreadnought drifting?" Shepard frowned, folding his arms. "The GARDIAN batteries on Horizon barely scorched that thing."

"Perhaps they struck at a tender spot and the turians were able to exploit it. Regardless, this is the best lead we've had, despite the danger." The Illusive Man sat, tapping ash off his cigarette.

A possibility. He still had trouble wrapping his mind around the fact that Sovereign had invested so much of itself into possessing Saren that whatever feedback had been caused by his death had left the Reaper vulnerable. But if the Reapers themselves were fallible...

Shepard hummed noncommittally. "Are you sure this information is good?"

The Illusive Man's reply was eminently confident. "Information is my weapon, Shepard. It's good."

He sighed inwardly. Regardless of how badly they needed intel on the Collectors, getting anywhere near that dreadnought again without their new armor installed concerned him. But if worse came to worse, the Normandy had some very sharp teeth, courtesy of Garrus. "All right, I'll check it out. Send the coordinates to EDI."

* * *

Garrus had picked up on the tension between Tali and Liara as soon as he'd sat down beside Joker. The two women were as far as they could get from each other, sitting on different couches, but even with the distance their eyes seemed to occasionally wander toward the other and just as quickly flit away. Of course, it wasn't as if he expected any different between himself and Shepard when the latter arrived. He chose to shore himself up with another swallow of rough spirits, ignoring the subtle frown Chakwas gave him.

"So, Liara, Garrus told me you were all ready to flay someone alive with your mind when we first visited," Joker said cheerfully. "Why couldn't you do that two years ago? You know, when you were trying to stop a threat to the galaxy. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think it's awesome you're broadening your horizons and all, but you're supposed to have big ugly guys to handle the breaking of the kneecaps and stuff. Like Wrex, or Shepard."

Liara smirked at him, some of the tension abating. "If you could break kneecaps, you would be eminently qualified for that position, Joker. You're certainly ugly enough. And for your information, Wrex is considered very handsome by krogan standards."

"The scars," Garrus clarified, absently rubbing his own. "You know, the things warriors earn in battle instead of from falling down and shattering their legs out of clumsiness." As the others laughed, Joker's little grin vanished, morphing into a smirk. He turned to Tali.

"So, Tali, did Cerberus put Shepard's N7 tattoo back on when they gave him all new skin?"

"Shepard had a tattoo?" Liara asked, her brow furrowing in puzzlement. "I don't remember that."

"That's because you took your showers in the ladies' room," Joker replied, grinning. Liara seemed to pale when she got his meaning, glancing reflexively at Tali who only crossed her legs casually. Garrus resisted the urge to snicker. The antics of alien females had always amused him. Turian women tended to just stare awkwardly at him and back away. The thought inspired him to take another drink.

"Oh," Liara said dully.

Rolling her eyes, Karin set her glass down on the table. "Jeff, stop trying to provoke them. Shepard never had a a tattoo."

"Actually, I did, but I had it removed years ago," Shepard said as he walked in, a subtle frown on his face. He didn't stop or even look at them, storming over to his armor locker and opening it. "We've got to go. We got intel that there's a Collector ship adrift in space and we're on our way in ten minutes."

His five guests exchanged stunned glances, standing. "Wait," Garrus spoke up, "a Collector ship, just out there just floating?"

"Apparently a turian patrol left it disabled but bit it in the process." Shepard had already pulled off his jacket and was stripping off his shirt to replace it with the snug, insulating black garment worn under his armor.

"That sounds... convenient," Liara said, her voice hesitant and worried. "I saw some of the footage from Horizon and we all remember what happened to the Normandy."

"Yeah," Shepard replied tersely, sitting on the bed to start unlacing his boots. "Very convenient. I don't know what the hell we're going to find, but I'll probably split us up into two teams. Garrus, you've got Thane, Jack, Kasumi, Zaeed, and Jacob."

Garrus nodded silently. Concerns about his suitability didn't even occur to him, but he almost smiled with the knowledge that Shepard had no qualms about leaving him in the role of second squad leader.

Tali spoke up. "Wait a minute. How do we know this isn't a trap?"

Shepard looked up and smiled ruefully at her before his attention was diverted toward the cabin door. They all turned to see Miranda standing there, looking almost frazzled. "The Illusive Man was quite confident his information was good. Has he ever been wrong, Miranda?"

His XO shook her head and glanced at the others anxiously. "No, not to my knowledge. Um... Shepard, what about...?"

Apparently unconcerned with the number of females in his cabin seeing him in his shorts, Shepard tossed his pants aside and pulled out his lower armor with a sigh. "I know, Miranda. It's your call. I won't object if you want to stay behind."

Liara appeared to be the only spectator who wasn't confused, looking over at the Cerberus operative that was chewing her lip. "Is this about Oriana?"

Pale blue eyes blinked. "I... yes. How did you...?"

Shepard chuckled, fastening his belt while Tali prepared the other half of his armor. "Information broker."

"I may be able to delay matters. I could raise a customs flag and tangle up enough paperwork to keep them on Illium for a day or two."

Miranda's eyes opened, and Garrus thought he saw the faint glimmering of moisture in their corners. "I... thank you. I'd appreciate that." Liara immediately opened up her omni-tool and began tapping away.

"Who's Oriana?" Joker asked.

"What the hell are you still doing up here?" Shepard barked. "Get your ass down to the cockpit, Joker! I don't want the damn AI flying us there!"

Flinching, Joker nodded and began hobbling off. Garrus watched him pass up a swiftly moving Mordin, idly wondering if the conversation would be as entertaining as it had been the last time the salarian had been on deck one. Shepard spotted him and flinched slightly.

"Mordin, please tell me you're not here for medical matters," Shepard muttered.

Large black eyes blinked. "No. Well, yes, in a manner of speaking." Tali appeared horrified for a split second, silver eyes flashing in Liara's direction. "Wanted to remind you to take seeker swarm countermeasure and to ask if you wanted me to accompany the ground team." Shepard had been working on three different rosters for various squad sizes and had left Mordin off one of them due to his medical expertise.

Shepard helped Tali tighten down a fastening on his breastplate, flashing her a tiny smile before he shook his head. "I was going to have you stay aboard and help Karin get the medbay ready just in case."

Mordin was speaking almost before he'd finished his sentence. "Collector corpses disintegrated on Horizon, no opportunity for in-depth study. Recommend I accompany you, take detailed scans."

Shepard paused with one foot in a boot, eying him contemplatively. "All right, if you think it's important, but you stay in the back. I have a bad feeling about this and I'd rather not have one of my doctors out of action."

"The ship's adrift, Shepard," Miranda pointed out. "It's not likely we'll encounter the kind of resistance we found on Horizon."

Garrus met Shepard's eyes, a subtle frown on both of their faces. Apparently his friend didn't put any more faith in Miranda's boss than he did. "Just the same, I think I'll go check the cannons," Garrus said, heading for the exit as others moved to follow him.

Shepard pulled on his gloves, watching the door to his cabin hiss shut behind Mordin, leaving him alone with Tali and Liara. When he looked up at the quiet women, he blinked at the sight of Liara's white combination suit and armor. "I'd forgotten you weren't on the crew. You'd better get going, Liara. We're departing in a few minutes."

The asari hesitated, glancing between the two of them. After a moment she spoke, her voice clear and firm. "I'm coming with you."

Tali looked taken aback. "Don't you have people to spy on and debtors to threaten?" she asked, her voice a quiet mutter.

"Tali," he said gently, swallowing his irritation at their antagonism. "Imagine we'd had a fight that last day on the old Normandy instead of just being embarrassed. How would you have felt then?"

Her hooded head drooped and it took her a moment to find her voice. "I... okay. Maybe you have a point."

"'I do," he confirmed, standing and turning to Liara. "And I'll take my own advice. I'm sorry I snapped at you and walked out, Liara. No, I'll never be thrilled it was Cerberus money that put me back together, but I doubt anyone else would have." Some of the tension left her shoulders and the tiniest of smiles formed on her lips as she met his gaze. "At least, anyone with their cash reserves." He stepped up and wrapped his arms around her in a gentle hug, kissing her cheek. "Thank you."

When he slipped away, a genuine, if shy, smile was on her lips. Which, he noticed, were painted black. Between the dark lipstick and her multi-purpose white and blue armor, it almost felt as if he was looking at two different people; the wide-eyed maiden he'd brought aboard on Therum, and the hardened information broker she'd become. But the brightness of her sapphire eyes reminded him more of the former. Smiling, he stepped aside. "All right. Now, if you want to come, you can. I won't turn down another scientist and biotic. But only if the two of you bury the hatchet. Otherwise, you'd better go. I don't need catfights on my ship." He gave them a teasing smile and headed for the exit, trailing his hand lightly down Tali's arm in passing.

When the door closed, Tali returned her friend's awkward gaze. A small part of her wanted to smack her gloved hand across the cheek Shepard had kissed, but it was hard to ignore the fact that he'd forgiven her for handing his body over to Cerberus when so many of his men died at their hands. After a moment's hesitation, she sighed quietly and found her voice.

"I'm sorry," they both said at once. The room fell silent for another few seconds, and then they both laughed nervously.

"Me first," Tali said. "I, um... I guess it really doesn't matter _why_ you did it. I don't think his mother or anyone else cares about anything but having him back. I shouldn't either."

"Maybe," Liara said dubiously, sitting on the edge of the bed with a small frown. "I don't know, Tali. I remember thinking when we were on shore leave that everything would be okay, even without my mother, since I had all of you. I never had many friends before the Normandy. I never really felt like I needed them. I was content with my research." She smiled wanly down at the deck. "And then, even with her gone and no dig site to keep me fascinated, I found myself happy. But..."

"But then it all vanished," Tali finished quietly. "I know. The Fleet didn't really feel like home anymore when I went back."

"I think that's why I called you so often," Liara added thoughtfully. "You were the only one left, really. It was nice to still have someone."

Tali felt the anger in her heart beginning to simmer again but chose to vent it in more level tones. "But you never told me. I don't know how you could be my friend and keep that a secret!" Liara winced, but she found no satisfaction in the landing of the blow. She only dropped to a seat on the edge of the desk, sighing. "I know why you did, but it would have been nice to have something to hope for." Bowing her head, she stared down at the deck, remembering the hopelessness that had often left her in tears in the late hours of the night. "Keelah, I kept thinking that the Reapers would show up one day and that would be the end. Everything we did would be a waste. And... I felt guilty."

She saw Liara's head lift out of the corner of her eye. "Guilty? Why?"

She shrugged. "Because I wasn't doing anything except fixing engines and rewiring circuits. It all seemed so pointless. It wasn't until a few months ago that I felt any kind of hope, when I started going off on missions researching the geth. I thought 'finally, maybe we can find some data on the Reapers, something that people will believe.'"

Liara's voice was soft in its reply. "I wish you would have told me. I always thought you would be all right. You still had your father and you told me once the Fleet was like your family."

Tali shrugged, feeling a familiar confusing mix of feelings at the mention of her father. "Maybe I should have. I just tried to put it all out of my mind whenever we talked."

They fell into silence for a minute, the only noise the sound of the ventilation system that she'd set to constantly filter the air. "I'm sorry, Tali," Liara murmured. "I should have told you."

Tali exhaled deeply, feeling some of her resentment dissipate at the simple, heartfelt apology. It was a start. "Well..." she began, an idea springing to mind. "...maybe you can make it up to me."

"How?"

Lifting her head, she smiled wryly behind her visor. "You can tell me what Shepard's first name is."

Liara laughed and then sighed dramatically. "I have no idea. I didn't come across it in my 'snooping'."

"Damn," Tali muttered, a grin on her lips despite her disappointment.

* * *

Something told him to pack heavy for the mission, so he attached an Eviscerator shotgun to his back beneath the arc projector and issued orders to Jacob for everyone to bring along an assault rifle on his way out the armory door. Twenty seconds later he drew up beside Miranda in the cockpit, laying a hand lightly on her shoulder. She turned her head with some surprise but gave him a weak smile. Her tension was hard to miss, despite Liara's offer to keep Oriana and her family on Illium where Lanteia could keep an eye on things.

"Nothing to it," he murmured to her. "We'll go in, grab some intel, blow the thing to hell with Garrus' new toys, and head back to Illium for some shore leave."

"Liar," Miranda replied wryly, her voice equally soft. "You have a bad feeling about this, don't you?"

His reassuring grin fell away to be replaced by a frown. "Something about the Collectors always gives me a bad feeling. Every time I looked at one on Horizon, there was... I don't know. Something."

"_Lieutenant Moreau has referred to the Collectors as 'walking bugs,'" _EDI spoke up, her blue hologram appearing on the port side of the cockpit. _"Given their anatomical differences from humans and their status as Reaper collaborators, some discomfort is understandable."_

"Yeah, don't get me started on what you look like, EDI," Joker muttered. Shepard glanced at Miranda to see her rolling her eyes, but there was a tiny smile on her lips.

"Well, whatever it is, they're dangerous and need my boot up their ass. That's all I need to know." Shepard stepped up behind Joker's chair and laid a hand on the backrest, gazing out at the millions of glittering stars in view. "How long, Joker?"

"Thirty seconds. Stealth systems are engaged, but you remember how well that worked last time."

"Vividly," Shepard muttered. "Are the cannons warmed up?"

"Armed and ready," Tali answered behind him. Turning, he saw Liara approaching beside her, their pace even and shoulders relaxed. He smiled inwardly to know some things were going right. "Kenneth promises he fixed the power balance problems."

"Good." He looked Liara over, noting her borrowed weapons and rebreather. "So, Doctor T'soni, ready to kill some bugs?"

Liara's sapphire eyes twinkled. "Well, I'm not pissed off, but I am ready to shoot something. Just find me some bugs, Shepard."

The SR-1 veterans laughed, remembering one of the commander's quotes from their time assisting an Alliance unit with a rachni nest.

"There it is." Joker's quiet statement broke the amusement and they all stared out the viewscreen. The dark, chaotic shape of the Collector ship looked like an asteroid that had been impaled with spikes and given a patchwork of tech to get it moving. It was every bit as menacing as it had been two years prior over Alchera, even dark and slowly tumbling helplessly end over end.

"Goddess," Liara murmured, apparently remembering as well. A thought occurred to him.

"Joker, do you detect any wreckage from the turian ships? Maybe we can salvage some of their sensor recordings."

"_Passive scans detect no debris, Shepard," _EDI answered. "_However, given the Collector vessel's current velocity, it may be out of range."_

For some reason, he doubted it. "Maybe." He turned to the others. "Let's get to the shuttles."

As they walked down the bridge corridor he took one last glance over his shoulder at the hulk drifting silently through space, a tight grimace thinning his lips.

* * *

**Author's note:**

_I never really understood why Ashley/Kaidan and Liara were virtually excluded in the second game. It also felt like everyone was remarkably calm about Shepard coming back from the dead. At any rate, don't be surprised to see them more involved in this story, even if they don't get assigned a rack on the Normandy._

_I plan to give my less-referenced characters some more page time. They're not easy to write, but I enjoy a challenge._


End file.
